Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 35
September 16, 2022
Everything answers the call to home
Everything answers the call to home. Hiro Boga
What do you consider home? What do you answer the call to?
Is it a space where you grew up, a house? Is it in nature? Is it a spot on a bench? A song?
Where do you go when you get a calling back to Self?
What I have learnt is, the call to home becomes a whisper when we lead busy lives, when it is ignored life will show up more and more loudly to get your attention. What get's you to stop in your tracks? that is what life will do.
The call to home may or may not be a painful one - you get to choose. The more self aware you are, the more you are able to hear the whisper.
According to Hiro Boga, that call can emerge as restlessness, emptiness, a longing for something as-yet unnamed. We work harder, or party more. We hang onto relationships that leave our hearts blighted, or we buy stuff . . .
When we go searching for "home" outside of ourselves, we remain dissatisfied, it cannot be found. The call to home is an inside job.
Listen to your body, to your soul and recognize that there is a space inside you which will always be home. You have to go inside, go to the space, locate the peace and be unwavering about it. If you go there consistently there is guidance and lessons and wisdom and love there.
Peace
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
September 14, 2022
love isn't really love if it's not loving
love isn't really love if it's not loving. - Stacey Herera
What does love mean to you? How do you define it? Have you even reflected on what it is, how it feels? Confession on the Journey - when I just got married I thought love meant no arguments and no leaving, fun times and passion. I lived by that credo. Of course to be disappointed. There were times with little fun, dried up passion and differing opinions - well when he left, I thought that love was a complete waste of time! What is it anyway if all of the things I believed it was just was NOT!
Life guided me - kicking and screaming to love....myself first so I can take that love and loving to everyone else.
With my analytical mind, at the time, I researched what love is, how is it supposed to look and feel. What I researched did not resonate at all. I read books, papers and watched documentaries to determine how and what was love in order for me to "do it right" When I surrendered to wanting to control, fix, avoid pain and make everything perfect, that feeling that I know was love came to me.
What I learnt is self reflection started my journey towards love. I had to look within and determine how I felt, what I wanted, what brought me peace and joy. What I wanted to do when the pain and argument came first with self and others?
What would it look like for me to be more loving, even when you're triggered? Would it mean being more patient? More gentle? More present? More honest about how you're feeling? more forgiving?
I also learnt that it was so easy to take for granted those I love, including myself. Because its familiar, because you have seen both yourself and your lover vulnerable, first thing in the morning, with the breath and all! its easy to say well they KNOW me so its a default to take it for granted and forget the love. We neglect ourselves, we eat poorly, don't rest, take nonsense from others - this is us taking love of self for granted.
No judgment. I'm a work in progress just like you, doing my best to walk my talk.
So, this is your gentle reminder to know for yourself, inside yourself
Love is showing up and being consistent
Love is being self aware
Love is keeping your word
Love is making time for fun and joy
Love is taking risks
Love is being authentic
Love is patient
Love is kind
Love is not arrogant or boastful
Love does not insist on its own way
Love is listening to your intuition and to your others
Love does not delight in retribution
Love is forgiving self and others
First to self, then to others
Keep the thread going
Peace
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
September 12, 2022
Noticing feels so much more doable than fixing
Noticing feels so much more doable than fixing. Tending to feels so much more kind than forcing. Practicing feels so much more possible than changing. Lisa Olivera
Over the past few weeks I have been struggling with feelings of enoughness, I have been doubting myself and making up stories. So many factors contributed to these feelings such as starting a new online course - will it be good enough? supporting someone close to me through grief - am I doing enough? deciding whether I want to continue doing the work that I started a few years ago - is this in alignment with where and what I want to do now? Is it enough?
I acknowledge that doubt comes with being human, and I guess that the practice of overcoming doubt remains one that is ongoing, one that we require the right tools in order to move forward.
Confessions on the Journey - there are many times that I forget the tools and lessons that I have learnt and default to the doubt, to the reaction, to the making up stories and ignoring my intuition. I am so grateful that I have been practicing on the Journey, especially this year, on forgiving myself, on authenticity, on letting go, on courage. These have been the principles that remind me to get back to centre.
Rather than stress and terrorize myself this time around, I have been practicing the following and want to share them with you as we Journey together:
Slow down — “take some time with this thought, no reaction, no fixing, only pausing.”
Locate the unease in your body — “my stomach, my head.”
Explore the basis of your thinking — “I’m afraid I’ll let people down, which will make them leave.” I am afraid of being abandoned
Validate that experience — “It makes sense to fear abandonment, aka your core wound. Duh. Of course. It makes sense for that fear to come up quickly.”
Do a reality check — “What else could happen? What else could be true? What else might unfold? And, even if you did let people down, how might that actually be okay?”
Come back to YourSelf— “It’s okay for fear to come up, and you can also remember what is true. You don’t need to be for everyone. That isn’t your job. Your job is to do your best and be real , and let others decide what they do with it. That’s all.”
Breathe — into my stomach, into what’s true, into safety.
(please don’t think I’m able to do this with every single hard thought I ever have… it’s an ongoing imperfect practice.)
What I have learnt is that as life goes on I will come face to face with uncomfortable or challenging situations. Not because I moved past a situation using the tools that it may never come up again. in fact, the tools can be used in many different situations and practice makes masters.
Forgiveness helps!
Forgiveness of self helps when I feel scared, uncomfortable, and irresponsible.
According to Lisa, The truth is that no amount of shape-shifting will keep us safe from rejection, from being disliked, from being judged and criticized, from not being everyone’s cup of tea. No amount of molding ourselves into what we think others want us to be will keep us from not actually being that for everyone. No amount of efforting, of forcing, of dedication to performance, of acting skills, or of desire will keep us from experiencing the pain of sometimes letting people down, sometimes getting it wrong, sometimes disappointing others, and sometimes flat out becoming a bad character in someone else’s story.
The most important thing is how we respond to what is in front of us, its important to have the tools at hand.
Peace
(process created by Lisa Olivera)
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
September 6, 2022
On Forgiving Yourself
More than anything, you give yourself what you need, instead of what you crave. Treating your energy like a precious resource has a deep effect on your life. Yung Pueblo'
A huge part on the journey to forgiveness is learning to forgive yourself, and once you have learned to forgive yourself, be willing to do it consistently and with grace.
I have learnt to forgive myself:
1. When I have ignored my intuition.
2. When I have judged myself, especially harshly.
3. When I dishonored myself.
4. When I forget who I am - an idea that came reality from the Most High
5. When I outsource my power and responsibility to others.
6. When I blame others, project onto others due to shame, guilt and denial.
When I forgive myself, the path is made clear to forgive others.
Peace
September is here, are you ready to go on a Self Awareness Journey- It's an Inside Job.Four Week Immersive online Workshop. Join us, spread the word. Self Awareness - Tools for the Journey - SIGN UP NOW
September 1, 2022
September is the Journey to Forgiveness
Self-analysis and observation is the only way you can create change in your life. Forgive yourself and know that all of your previous actions were created from your level of consciousness at that time in your life. ACIM
Welcome to the Journey to Forgiveness.
What does forgiveness mean to you?
I have learnt that it means giving yourself grace, accepting that things in the past are gone and forgiveness allows for a clear path forward.
Forgiveness must be one of the toughest lessons on my Journey, I wanted people to pay for any "wrong" doing to me, I wanted others to know who did me "wrong", I spent a lot of energy sharing a story both to myself and anyone who would listen about other people and their "ways"
Did not do me a fat lot of good I must say, I spent loads of energy and time on proving and shaming rather than on healing and growing. Its been getting better, I practice, practice and practice forgiving myself. I start with looking in the mirror daily and saying
"Akosua, I forgive you today for......"
every day!
Daily it gets easier to believe, to practice and to forgive.
It is indeed a process.
Most important lesson has been to forgive yourself first!
Happy Journeys
Peace
August 31, 2022
People are ultimately responsible for their own attitudes and actions.
people are ultimately responsible for their own attitudes and actions. Adam Grant
How do you respond to what situation is in front of you? How do you respond when that situation is totally out of your control?
A Course in Miracles talks about making decisions based on illusions. I love that. We make decisions based on what is not real and expect to benefit.
I can share that sometimes I have made decisions on what I thought should have happened, what I was told is best to happen, how I judged, how angry I am. Rather than on what is exactly in front of me at the present moment.
Blaming, projecting, judging are shrouded in illusions, we make real that others are responsible for what we do, what we said, what we did not do, what we did not say.
We outsource responsibility for for our attitudes, for our decisions.
I have learnt that I give away my inherent power when I outsource my responsibility and make decisions from a place of illusion,
We are ultimately responsible for our attitudes and behavior- it is our ability to respond that makes a difference.
Yes, people, places and things play a part in our decisions, yes we have to take into account situations. However, the moment we forget that we alone must take responsibility is the moment we give away our power.
Pay attention to when you start judging, blaming, denying, avoiding. Changes are you can take a pause and make a decision from your power rather than your illusions.
Peace
August 29, 2022
Things I learned on the Devotion Train
Devotion is different than hardworking. It's totally separate from disciplined. It's such intense loyalty that it has to be born from something else entirely: love. Maxie McCoy
There is a mantra that my friend and I share on days when we are about to do something tough, something we dread, or something that we may not like.
Show up with Love and Devotion
Hearing this brings me back to the now moment. It reminds me that I am love and devotion leads to mastery.
What are you devoted to? What is the thing that you do rooted in love and you show up for?
Sharing the ten things that I have learned to keep me on the Devoted Train
1. Focus on the Love, rather than the Fear.
2. Focus on what you are giving, rather than losing - Devotion is not about sacrifice but service.
3. Remind yourself of the "why" - if you don't know the why, find it, if you can't then you are not yet devoted.
4. Be grateful - Give thanks through and for it all.
5. Build and Know your Tribe - who is for you, in your corner, authentic and bold enough to give you a kind word of truth?
6. Balance - Have fun, rest when you are tired.
7. Celebrate the small wins
8. Have a strong NO and a string YES - no to the things that diminish you, dishonor you. Yes to the things that light you up.
9. Take Small steps and learn as you grow, there is no perfect way
10. Just start... and make it Consistent.
Peace
August 27, 2022
Release from Fear Comes From Changing Our Minds
Trying to rearrange external circumstances to alleviate fear, such has changing behavior or changing our environment, will not work. Release from fear comes only through changing our mind and accepting that we remain part of God and share His Love. ACIM
There is this saying that how we interpret an event brings more fear than the event itself. I know I can testify, even with little events. I sometimes make up elaborate stories - all by myself- if I have to visit the doctor. By the time I arrive at the doctor's office, my blood pressure is literally high because I have been stressing myself out with fear.
Making up stories without all the facts and details can fuel fear. We put pressure on ourselves to control what is happening outside of us, to control the narrative. In fact, we look to find a way to control anything that we believe we can control to support us in eliminating the fear, and discomfort. I have learnt that changing my mind from fear to love supports in eliminating the fear. How? Simply affirming to myself, there is nothing to fear, and what ever it is I am equipped to handle it. I may not automatically believe that however, saying it puts my mind on notice that there is another way to approach a situation rather than fear, control and manipulation.
It also supports in me pausing on making up stories. Trust me, those stories can mash you up!
The next time you catch yourself in the grips of fear with the response of making up stories and wanting to control the external:
Pause. Affirm. Proceed
Peace
September we go on a Self Awareness Journey- Four Week Immersive online Workshop. Join us, spread the word.
Self Awareness - Tools for the Journey - SIGN UP NOW
August 25, 2022
What are you focusing on?
Focus on your tribe of supporters. Oya
What you focus on grows. Supporters go far beyond only telling you what you want to hear, they are the ones who cheer for you and also let you know when you need to raise your game.
I hear quite a bit about the "haters" people speak and write about them. It is useful to know who is not in your corner, however if you focus and spend time on that, you will not give yourself the opportunity to focus on yourself on raising your game, on achieving your goals.
You must ask yourself -
"what am I focusing on?"
"what am I telling myself?"
"what is taking me away from the things I say I want?"
Once you have asked yourself these questions with the courage to hear the real response, you can move toward making and taking the necessary steps to find your tribe, find your voice and live your own life.
Peace
September we go on a Self Awareness Journey- Four Week Immersive online Workshop. Join us, spread the word. Sign up Now - Welcome to Self Awareness - Tools for The JourneyAugust 22, 2022
Imagine the Possibilities
Our world needs us, each of us, to bring our whole selves to the task of renewal and regeneration. Steadily. Faithfully. Devotedly. With focus and power. Hiro Boga
Can you imagine if all of us, individually, focused on healing, loving, remembering who we are, and connecting with others from a space of brotherly and sisterly love?
Can you imagine what the world will look like? This is the power of us doing the individual work. The power of each person focusing on doing the work to live a full life of purpose and love.
Can you imagine what the world will look like if we focus on collaboration rather than lack and proving to others?
I imagine it quite often, it is a motivation to continue on this journey of learning and sharing the lessons.
Imagine all the possibilities!
Peace
