R.J. Blain's Blog, page 53
February 27, 2020
The Beard has Returned.
We call the male the Beard because he has a fluffy chin. He has safely returned. However, he is not providing food like males should, and the female is whining because she’s hungry. World might be ending. (World also might be ending because she was up at Dark Thirty to make sure the Beard was awake to go to the airport on time.
Here is a picture of some tasty treats the Beard acquired for the female when she was dealing with a doctor’s appointment. Tasty treats are tasty, and she doesn’t let...
February 26, 2020
The House Lost at Sea and Other Shenanigans from the Blain Household
Dear humans,
The female has taken to coping with the male’s disappearance via foods the male doesn’t like. Yesterday, she ordered from the Vietnamese place, which is one of her favorite nomnoms. She really loves this nomnoms, humans. She was so excited to go outside and meet another human to retrieve these nomnoms.
Not pictured are two other of those fried rolls that she so loves. They’re very tasty. Also not pictured is the mango slushie with strawberry she also purchased, as the Vietnamese...
February 24, 2020
Dear humans, I was bad. (I’m not sorry.)
1: I pawed my way over to The Run Around and inserted Juliette via special Kitty Edits. You’re welcome.
2: I hit ‘send’ to the beta proofreaders before the female could do yet another pass on this book she’s edited to death. You’re welcome, female.
3: I’m making the female work late tonight because she needs to get stuff done, and unless she writes a lot, she can’t order the cover for a Mag Rom Com she really wants to do. The title has cost her (temporarily) several friendships, and she hopes...
February 22, 2020
My apologies.
As posted on facebook:
To those who are upset regarding my print choices to go large print to accommodate disabilities without accommodating your specific disability,
I apologize that this choice has negatively impacted you.
I cannot continue to make two individual versions of the book in print, and I have been seriously debating discontinuing print altogether due to the heartache and trouble it creates for me–along with the expense. It is *not* a significant money maker for me. (To keep...
Let’s Talk about ARCs & book availability. Also, Humor for the Holidays is now available.
Before I get into the nitty gritty, please enjoy this picture of me using the female as my pillow. She’s such a good human slave, doing what I want, when I want, and how I want. See? She was doing a good job. How do you know? I’m smiling!
Now that you have been brought into line with the cuteness of my sleeping self, I am barring the female from working to discuss a surprisingly complicated and controversial subject: ARCs. Advanced Reader Copies. AKA, free books exchanged for review.
The...
February 19, 2020
Cold Flame’s Release & Other Random Stuff from the Trenches
Dear humans,
As you can tell from this photograph, I am not impressed. Why am I not impressed, you may ask? The female is being a so-and-so, and she needs to go to her corner and take some chill pills. Alas, she doesn’t have a prescription for a chill pill, so she’s having a… orange vanilla Coca-Cola instead.
I don’t think you’re supposed to be having that, female.
Long story somewhat short: the female’s blood pressure is high because of the medications that keep her reproductive organs from...
February 8, 2020
News from the Trenches
Dear humans,
The female has been busy. She is revamping as much of her books as humanely possible as part of her ‘make words go better’ campaign. So, there’s a lot in the works, and the wench is making me tell you all about it.
Do I look like a servant to you? She thinks I’m a servant!
As my lack of fucking thumbs bars me from entering the treat container without help, I’m stuck doing this wretched task. Revenge will be coming, female. Just you wait and see.
1: The Royal States series is...
February 1, 2020
A State of the Blain Address, Plus Blood Bound Released!
Dear humans,
The male was mean to the female. He made her get rid of the desk she’s had for fifteen years. (That’s almost my entire lifespan, female! It was old! Let it die!) It was bad for her back and neck.
She now has one that goes up and down at her whim. It looks like this:
The mug is new. It came in the mail today. She is drinking tea in it. It pleases her. The desk is white. This does not please her. At all. She wanted espresso. She got white instead. Now everything is all clashy on...
January 19, 2020
Shammed Audiobook, a new Preorder, (It’s something special, y’all!) and Other News from the Trenches.
Dear humans,
The female bought us a present. It’s a television stand with a fireplace built in, and when she flips the magical switch, it makes us warm! We like it very much. She also put our laser pointer toy on the Booze Shelf, and they keep turning it on for us! We’re having a great time.
P.S.: The humans are not raging alcoholics. They just collect fancy bottles of booze, and they sometimes drink them. The one with the pinkish-purple top is the female’s.
Next week, she gets a new desk...
January 10, 2020
For Authors: Advertising, Market Research, and Ad Targeting. A Cat’s Guide to Losing Your Sanity in Several Easy Steps.
Dear humans,
Today, the female has asked me to give the Furred & Frond’s opinion on market research, advertising, and stuff like that to other authors hoping to build a viable career for their books. Honestly, we started laughing when she said that. Then we realized she was serious, and we stopped laughing.
Advertising, understanding the market, and basically… anything to do with the publishing industry is a work-in-progress, much like the progress of the female’s crochet project. She is...
