R.J. Blain's Blog, page 54
October 27, 2019
For Authors: Building a Business Plan
Dear humans,
This post is for authors, but everyone is invited to read. Before we begin, while we’ll be including general writing tips whenever we do an update on the female’s writing progress, to be done at random intervals as we felines see fit, we won’t be doing a lot more of these.
We’re sorry.
We’re currently working on writing a humorous little piece that goes into the details of us felines caring for a female author–and the business sides associated with it, but the female is tired.
She doesn’t have the energ...
October 22, 2019
A Day in the Life of the Female.
The headline of this article is misleading. I’m a cat, and if I didn’t mislead you every now and then, you might become suspicious. I’m convinced you like when I do things like this, so I will continue to do so.
But, keep reading. There are actually some important announcements in this post. Somewhere. Aw, hell. I’ll start with them.
We goofed.
One or two books have multiple versions at a vendor. This is because the female is having difficulties right now, and she went on autopilot while uploading finals to...
October 11, 2019
The Daily Grind: October 10, 2019 & A Writing Tip
Please enjoy this picture of me in my Halloween costume. I’m a spider. Be afraid, humans. Be very afraid!
PG&E took out the male’s workplace. The female had to attempt to coexist with the male under working conditions. Shenanigans ensued.
The female was very relieved when the male of the species learned power had been restored to his workplace.
Her attempt to flee to Barnes & Noble to work for a while died a terrible death due to everyone else trying to flee to Barnes & Noble for internet ac...
October 9, 2019
The Daily Grind: October 9, 2019.
Dear humans,
The female wrote 5,090 words today. She is happy with this! She is also not happy I refused to cooperate with her ‘artistic photography’ efforts. Frankly, she’s wrong. Aren’t I beautiful? I am so beautiful.
We still have power. PG&E taunts us all. The male is stressed, as he doesn’t know if he’ll have power at work tomorrow.
No one knows what is happening any more.
Writing Tip of the Day: If you’re going to murder someone you don’t like in a book, change their name and remove an...
October 8, 2019
An Announcement, The Daily Grind, & Dear Diary, the Apocalypse Soon Begins…
Dear humans,
The Apocalypse begins tomorrow. Possibly. The male’s phone has beeped, informing him the cell company will do everything in their power to keep their cell towers operational. We are not hopeful.
PGE has added more cities to the list since this morning.
For the curious, we live in California, and it’s wildfire season. PGE now cuts power to areas if conditions are potentially dangerous for the start of wildfires to prevent one from starting. as such, the humans are not upset the p...
October 6, 2019
The Daily Grind: October 5, 2019.
Dear humans,
Do you hear that sound? It’s the sound of whining and sniffles, coming from the female. Apparently, she has caught a cold. I meant to post this yesterday, but the female ushered herself to bed and took away my computer access.
I don’t think anyone told her she doesn’t actually want to catch those cold things.
Despite her sniffles and general blehs, she wrote 1,721 words yesterday. She worked on the Run Around and Outfoxed. She also did some general plotting work on the Flame Gam...
October 4, 2019
Along Came a Starbucks: Daily Word Counts?!
Dear humans,
The female has lost her mind. That’s it. That’s all. She’s totally gone loco, and now here I am, doing her dirty work. Yuck.
So, here’s the deal.
There are author people who like seeing author people doing the grind, much like the female does. So, because the female has absolutely zero common sense anywhere in her wretched human body, I’ve been recruited to do two things.
Most days of the week.
One, I will confess her sins. (Err, share her accomplishments and failures for the da...
Author to Author: the Basics of Bringing a Book to Life.
Dear humans,
I have stolen this picture of Tia the Majestic for your enjoyment. It seemed appropriate, considering she was hard at work seeking attention and interrupting the female’s ability to write books.
This post is meant for authors, but readers are more than welcome to follow along. (Readers, scroll to the bottom for an announcement, if you please! Otherwise, you’ll find out in another post at another time. Eventually.)
For experienced authors, this is really basic. You probably don’t...
September 17, 2019
Teaser: Ginger Snapped.
Dear humans,
Today, I have stolen a snippet for your enjoyment! The female dared to not press the button on my new toy to make it go. I have chosen this theft as my retaliation. That, plus the more nice humans who order the book, the higher my odds of the female buying me even MORE new toys.
I need more toys.
She got me this little one with a magic button that makes the red dot appear! I love it. It’s glorious. I want to play with it ALL the time. All of the time, I tell you.
Then she got me...
September 16, 2019
Hypnos and Hoofin’ It Audiobooks are Now Available.
Dear humans,
Sometimes, only a picture of a scorched landscape will do. This is the female’s brain today. There are one or two stubborn trees clinging to life in an otherwise charred landscape.
She will be okay. For now, just leave her to her mumbling. She’s editing a book. She’ll be fine, albeit whiny.
Hoofin’ It: a Magical Romantic Comedy (with a body count) is now available for audiobook listeners. Go do your thing, people who wanted it in audio! It is here! Hooray!
