Roxy Mews's Blog, page 11

My Favorite NaNoWriMo Memes and a little outline #PReptober

Part of my absolute favorite prep for NaNoWriMo, that I get giddy about now, are my daily check-ins. A few years back, I started posting on Facebook a little NaNo pep talk to get myself hyped up. A few people began following and playing along. So I started a group for some friends and did the same thing with a bit more intention the following year. After that I ran a NaNoWriMo Word War group for my local RWA chapter.

This year, I'm going to open it back up, because I have lots of friends that aren't in RWA and I want to write with everybody. I'm also reviewing some of the memes I had last year. These are some that I still have stashed and make me giggle. The best part of NaNoWriMo is knowing you're not alone. Finding someone else that shares your struggles, or is your polar opposite, is one of my favorite things about this community. 

No one person has the same skillset or technique when getting their story from brain to paper. So we all have things we can learn too. Every year I participate, I try something different. This round, I've got a basic plot outline for my story. Which is a DAMN MIRACLE for this self-proclaimed pantser. I even made a spreadsheet in Excel, because I love me a good spreadsheet.

It's not pretty or colorful or even formatted well. It's just a basic rundown on everything I need to know, and because it's a spreadsheet, I can move it around.

The things I'm listing for each scene are...

1. Scene Number (Duh)
2. Characters - Who are the players in this scene? This is going to help me make sure people don't pop up out of nowhere.
3. Main Event -  What is the big thing that this scene revolves around? Of course other stuff happens, but this is what HAS to go down.
4. Setting - Where is it? This lets me see where my characters are at a glance if I'm coming back to a scene in progress.
5. POV - I'm writing in 3rd person this round, and going back and forth between the hero and heroine. This let me make sure I wasn't spending too much time in any one character's head.
6. Timeline - I used dates here, but I'm thinking of adding specific times of day as well. Either way, knowing when something happens is important, and a step I used to regret not doing as I was drafting.
7. Why It Matters -  If I can't come up with why a scene is important to the plot, and is just moving the characters from one setting to another, this is a good way to know it needs cut.
8. Done? - I added this one recently. It's SUPER helpful to know what scenes I've already knocked out and a simple "YES" puts me in the exact spot I need to go to next.

Using these basic headers for an outline, I've been able jump into my words faster than ever before. I'm giving this technique a trial run with my CP for the rest of this month, and I'm pleased with how the prep is paying off for me. 

Will my outline hold up until the end? Heck, no. I've already added characters and altered settings in a few spots. But I'm super excited to see how having this info will help me write up a synopsis and blurb when I'm done. That's for December, though. Right now and through November 30th, it's all about the word count.

You can see a few of my basic tips that work for both plotters and pantsers in my "Getting Ready For NaNoWriMo" post from last year. Or you can browse all my National Novel Writing Month goodies by clicking the "NaNoWriMo" and "National Novel Writing Month" tags.

Are you prepping for next month? Anything you're trying for the first time? I'd love to hear about it!

~Roxy

Daily Word Count Goal #Preptober

There are a lot of #PREPTOBER blogs out there, and yes...this is another one. "Preptober" is what those of us who are old hats at National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) refer to when we're talking about October. Because October is the month where we prep for a full thirty days of creating or working on refreshing our writing habits.

Many people want to get into the habit of writing every single day, and NaNoWriMo is a great time to get into that habit. Because if you can write every day in November in the United States during Thanksgiving, Daylight Savings Time, school parties and projects if you have little ones, and general overtime and extra work for those of us in the retail game, then you can write all year round.

Well...I know writing every day isn't realistic for me as my current schedule sits. I work a twelve hour shift every Sunday, and dealing with all that time on my feet and interacting with people means I come home and I know I won't be able to touch my WIP.

So part of my #Preptober every year is to find out what my actual word count goals are.

I threw together a quick calendar with the NaNoWriMo word count milestones on it. The image and the PDF file for download are available below if you need something basic too.​
nanowrimo_2018.pdfFile Size: 94 kbFile Type: pdfDownload File But I know that those Sundays and Thanksgiving are no-word-count days for me. 

So what I do, and what I encourage you to do, is sit down with this calendar, and your planner or your digital calendar app, and figure out how many days you have where you can actually write. 

1. Cross out any days where you are traveling, working overtime, or know are not writing days. BE HONEST.
2. Count your number of days.
3. Divide 50,000 by your number of days and round up. (You can't write 2/3 of a word.)

If I write absolutely every day I can, I'll have 22 days in November where I can add to my WIP. Meaning instead of the 1667 words NaNoWriMo tells me I need to get daily, I actually need to clock in with nearly 2300 words when I sit down at my laptop. 

I'm aiming for 2500 words per day to allow myself a buffer if I have a hard writing session. Meaning IF I stick to plan, I'll hit 50k on November 28th. *fingers crossed*

Are you participating in NaNoWriMo? Make sure you add me as a buddy. (I'm Roxy Mews on NaNoWriMo.org) If you want in my super secret NaNoWriMo group where I'll be posting daily, send me a message on Facebook telling me to get your ass in there. I posted a link to the group, but I don't think it's able to be found, so just drop me a message and I'll invite you in. Or you can fumble around Discord with me using this invite ( https://discord.gg/ftZE94x ) and you can probably teach me a few things about that platform as I try and figure it out with out using the nearest teen to answer questions for me.

What are you doing to get ready for next month's frenzy of literary abandon? I'd love to hear about it.

~Roxy

"Horny-Ass Moms"

*sigh* 

You too, Daily Show?

I was excited to watch this clip when it rolled past on my YouTube recommended feed. I am excited that Georgia might elect it's first Black Woman as Governor. And the fact that she's a romance writer was almost enough to make me want to move to Georgia just so I could have the chance to vote in such a historic election.

Who does the Daily Show think is going to vote for this top-of-her-class trailblazing woman and Georgia house minority leader? Go ahead. Watch.That's right. "Horny-Ass Moms". 
 
*deep breath*

Okay. So I thought we'd moved on from the romance genre being a punch line, but I guess it always circles back. 

Maybe moms are voting for Stacey Abrams because she is fighting for affordable education and child mental health services. Maybe humans are voting for her because she's working toward anti-discrimination laws. Or because she is working for our vets to keep their jobs at home when they are called on to serve.

But since she writes romance novels, all that is put aside. 

*yet another deep breath*

Guess what, world... ROMANCE READERS VOTE. I don't know of a more feminist and empowering genre than romance. And maybe those "Horny-Ass Moms" will be the next wave of incumbents. 

Romance readers read more than the average reader. Romance writers write more than the average writer - at least the successful ones do. Because we have to keep up with the demand for the BILLION dollar industry. According to RWA the romance genre occupied 34% of the fiction market in 2015. We're in a saturated market because in the end we want our heroes and heroines to accomplish their goals, and find their happily ever after. We fight through edits and re-writes and late nights after we've worked all day to get these stories written. 

Romance writers are tenacious and strong. Romance readers devour stories that give them the hope things can get better and we can overcome whatever obstacles are put in our way. 

#RomanceReadersVote

And I can't wait to watch people realize the reality that Romance Writers are also going to be leaders in the community and the country. Because we all know this gig comes with the need for a day job.

This romance reader votes for legal protection of LGBTQIA rights, for higher wages, more access to health care, and protection of the public school funds which are vital for kids with special needs. #RomanceReadersVote

— Roxy Mews (@RoxyMews) October 11, 2018

Anyone want to play along? I'd love to hear why you're exercising your right to vote on November 6th.

And for my non-US buddies, what do you think of a Romance Writer up for election over here in the states? Pretty damn cool, right?

Tweet me, comment, however you want to communicate. Tell me what you think. I'd love to hear it.

​~Roxy

"This Isn't Crap!"

"This isn't crap!"

The words we all shoot for when reviewing our WIP, am I right, writers? I heard my CP say those words the other night, and my first thought was, "Of course your book isn't crap. You're awesome! Now, my book? My book is crap."

We're our own worst critics. And while we might fall in love with our books by the end of the final round of line edits, the majority of us are constantly living in fear that people will find out we're faking this whole shebang, and are really just frauds.

Yes. We really all think that. 

There's even a term for it. "Imposter Syndrome."

Here's a quick video about it.
​There are all kinds of videos and blog posts about Imposter Syndrome out there. 

In the end. We all think we suck. And when we try to combat our negative thoughts with positive reinforcement that we're not alone, all that comes out of it is our brain will tell us..."Yeah. Totally true for other people. But I actually suck."

We all think we're that one schlub in dirty sweatpants at the gala. 

via GIPHY

Then someone, at some point tells us that we're not complete trash. They might compliment our work, or in a writer's case, leave a glowing review. 

The thing is, most of us don't know how to handle it. I've gone back to just a simple "Thank you" like I talked about a while back, but I'm still left feeling like I need to go lie down, because my brain can't wrap it's head around the praise.

via GIPHY

Many of you are probably nodding your head right now. Because you feel the same way. And you know what? 

You're just as wrong about yourself as I am about myself. We can't can't get it through our own skulls how awesome we are. 

So maybe we aim toward the middle. Let's aim for "Not Crap" first. Then we can scale our thought ladders and work towards praising our own accomplishments. 

At the end of the day we need to be able to walk up to a reader and honk our own horns. I'm off to get a few words in while the rain is pouring down outside. 

Are you writing today? Or doing something else your evil brain is telling you you can't do? Do it anyway. And just in case you need a soundtrack, here's a song to add to your playlist. Let's sing it together and get shit done.

​~Roxy

​

I'm ready to laugh again. and mean it.

"I'm ready to laugh again. And mean it."

Those were the last words I wrote in my morning pages today. 

Yesterday I chatted about and shared some of my favorite places to escape after a long day in retail. Customer service jobs are an interesting mix of real human connection and the ability to turn off emotion and eat shit with a spoon while smiling. I've learned a lot of skills over my two decades of working with the general public. 

I've learned how to go up and talk to pretty much anyone. Which served me well in conventions. I still stumbled and got star struck from time to time, but there wasn't a single person I wanted to meet that I didn't when afforded the opportunity.

I've learned to read people. Some people want to talk. Like the gentleman I got to chat with about his brand new sports car he got at seventy-five years old. Or the woman who needed a hug because she'd buried two people in the past week and was unable to read labels because of the tears in her eyes. Then there are people who won't get off their phones to give me their savings account information at the register. I just let those fuckers continue on with their conversations and without their sales cards. NEXT. But in learning to take stock of where someone is in their mental state by body language and intonation, I can interact with people or leave awkward conversations at appropriate moments.

I've learned patience. DEAR GOD HAVE I LEARNED PATIENCE. 

But I've also learned how to dim myself. 

Being a representative for someone else means I have to turn my own opinions and thoughts off. Because in order to keep my corporate funded and detailed job, I have to follow the rules even if they don't make sense. So a vast majority of my days on the job include finding a way to spin the tasks so as not to go against my personal thoughts on how the store should actually be run. It's a hard spin some days, and perhaps that's just my entrepreneurship education coming back to haunt me. (My very expensive education that I will never pay off. LOL)

I was writing with my CP last night and we were chatting about how even when we can't say the things we want to say out loud, we can create the world we want to see in our books.

Ever hear the threat from a writer that they will kill you in their books if you're not nice to them? Yeah. That's a thing. And even in fantasy, science fiction, and paranormal stories, a writer is going to incorporate their emotions into the book. For a book to connect, the writer has to be honest. 

I've seen a lot of people tell their readers that "if you don't like my Facebook and Twitter feed, you won't like my books." And you know what? There's truth to that, but there's also the opportunity to change minds through books. My DMA Files books were written during a time in my state where there were people being blocked from getting their marriage licenses. There was talk about how all this discussion around sex and love between people of the same or non-traditional gender labels was awful "for the children".  

via GIPHY

The vilification of sex as a whole and the idea that one type of love has more legal value than another between consenting adults, just hit my bullshit meter with such force that the world around the DMA Files was born. Why did I use robots? Well, I used robots because I wanted a character that was untouched by bias and shame around sex. And growing up with a Catholic school background it seemed impossible for a human to escape these biases from my own rationale. So my character in the book was a robot.

I remember vividly asking my editor about a manuscript, and asking if I was being too transparent in my own political leanings. Her response? "Have you read your robosex books?"

I laughed out loud. I wasn't as subtle as I thought I'd been at the time. Or perhaps she was of a similar mindset and it translated for her differently than it did for others. But I am of the mind that love between consenting adults, no matter if they are of the same gender, or how many are involved in the relationship, is intrinsically valuable and worth fighting for. Love is love is love is love.​ 
​​And while I was worried about how I was portraying my emotions into the stories, I am much less so now. I write with humor, or at least with stuff I find funny. And I write with the idea that love finds you among the most difficult and awkward situations. The humor is just a byproduct of being able to laugh at the horrid situations we sometimes find ourselves in. Because when things get bumpy, whether from external or internal obstacles, being able to laugh brings me out of it.

I spend a lot of my day as the real me tip-toeing. I don't tip-toe in my books. And I think that's why I love the stories. I don't hold back the cuss words. I don't hold back the sex scenes. And I don't hold back the jokes at the expense of a corrupt system holding back people I care about.

I'm writing again regularly, and I'm letting the one-liners and dad jokes fall right alongside the anger and frustration. I'm letting the comebacks and cuss words accompany the open-door sex scenes. Because I'm ready to laugh again. Really laugh without worrying about who might be listening. I'm putting this next batch of characters through hell, but I'm all in for making sure they see the light through love and humor.

I can't wait to laugh along with them again tonight when I write more of their story. I'm ready.

​~Roxy

Thought Ladder

I've seen a few different meanings for the term "Thought Ladder" and a few different applications for it. 

One option is illustrated very well in this Ted-Ed video below. Our thoughts run through a variety of steps to make it to our final conclusions and resulting actions. And only the first little bit of it is raw data. We filter and infer most of what we view through our lens of experiences.

Under this option, we can understand how this process works and attempt to cut off the ladder before we hit the escalating conclusions and actions that are very rarely based on facts.

Using a thought ladder like this, is beneficial in cutting off your brain's skilled ability to jump to conclusions. 
But the reason the term "Thought Ladder" showed up on my radar is my current favorite podcast Unf*ck Your Brain. I am almost at the end of my binge listen, and now I'm going to have to wait for the weekly installments like everyone else. (Insert sad emoji here)

One of the things Kara was talking about was using a thought ladder to change your way of thinking. Her whole philosophy is about changing your thoughts to change your life.

But changing your thoughts is easier said than done. So she talks about taking baby steps. Up a ladder. Hence the term.

I believe this was the episode where she was also talking about affirmations. She chatted about a lot of ways to turn your affirmations into things you can actually convince your brain is true. 

For example, if you're thinking... "I'm never going to get promoted. I'm always going to be struggling financially." Telling yourself "I'm wealthy and money is already in my bank account." isn't going to work, because your brain is automatically going to say, "But that's not true!"

So instead of starting with a negative, Kara suggests starting with a neutral and moving forward. Below is a random example of how you could apply the idea of starting with a negative thought and moving it to a neutral factual statement. 

EXAMPLE

8. I can't wait until the next job opens up and they have the opportunity to promote me.
7. I am qualified for the next step in my career.
6. This company is lucky to have me.
5. I'm good at what I do.
4. I'm a necessary member of my team.
3. I've lowered costs and helped the company free up capital to invest back in the business.
2. I'm always on time, and am productive when I'm at my job.
1. I'm never going to get promoted.



Now...could you jump from the first thought directly to the last? Nope. But from #1 to #2 or even #3 and #4 could be possible. 

I found an app called Think Ladder that I'm going to test out over the next couple of days and I'll let you guys know if it helped make this process any easier. But I thought it was a great way to start turning negative self-talk into positive and in an actionable way. 

I've had a rough week, and whenever I fall off the wagon, the negative thoughts tend to wiggle their way back in. In listening to the Unf*ck Your Brain Podcast, I've noticed Kara always talks about this type of self-improvement as "Work". And yeah. That's exactly what it is. Sometimes we have a bit more work ahead of ourselves than others. 

So I'm starting off today by making my own thought ladder with anything negative that comes up. I may only be able to move up one or two steps from where I start, but it's waaaay better than wallowing at the bottom. 

Have you used either of these techniques to change your thoughts? Any tips for someone trying it out for the first time? Or did you have a different definition of "Thought Ladder" that you're used to using? I'd love to hear about it.

~Roxy
(AKA, Woman starting on Rung 2)

I'm about to head back in...

I've been working in a retail or restaurant environment since I started my employment way back at sixteen. I've got more than twenty years into this gig, and while I enjoy helping people and making displays, there are times in my day that test my patience and make me question if humanity has gotten dumber over the years.

For anyone who has worked in the customer service industry, this is for you. Because we all know that feeling when it gets to be about five minutes before close, you've got the mop water ready, and an entire busload of people pulls up and files in like you're selling the last Twinkies during the apocalypse. 

via GIPHY

You plaster on a smile that is so fake it hurts your jaw and get to work. I work twelve hour shifts on Sundays, so when the horde descends, is when I really have to use those muscles and make it look like I'm not dead on my feet.

Over the years I've found the best way to deal, is to laugh. Because no matter what retail service environment you're in, there are a few constants that you'll always see. And the Retail Robin meme has been my source of laughter when I'm icing down my back spasms. I got to introduce a new employee to the giggles the other day and it reminded me that we're not alone in dealing with problematic customers. 

So for any retail warriors out there who haven't seen this meme. Here are a few of my "Retail Robin" favorites. And yes. During holiday hours we have played bingo. I have hit a bingo before, but I'm not sure I'd call it winning.  And there is a tumblr dedicated to the stories people have to tell and website called "Retail Hell Underground" that I highly recommend visiting when you've had a shit day. Because there's always something worse, and even if your story tops theirs, at least you know you're not alone. I've occasionally watched a YouTube video or two just to realize there are a ton of people out there dealing with this shit too. It's a good watch with a drink in hand after a long day. You might be asking yourself at this point why I keep going back if my job sucks so bad. Well, partly because my mortgage lender really doesn't care if I don't like my job, but in reality I have a few bright spots that I keep trying to find again like Pavlov's dog salivating to find the treat.

There was the one time I gave the tiniest kittens ever a bath and got all the fleas off of them while my manager ran the store, so I could help the little anemic babies until my favorite shelter volunteer got there to pick them up.

Or the time a girl came in with a kitten that was far too young and I had to help the poor thing go to the bathroom because babies can't do that by themselves without their momma. The kitten looked at me and I could see the relief in the poor thing's eyes.

Then there are all the puppy kisses I get when they find the toy or treat or harness that just makes them wiggle with joy. 

Even the times that someone has had the worst day ever and I offer someone to talk to, or a joke that makes them smile. 

That's why I go back. I work in a pet store now, if you can't tell. LOL. But there is something about helping people that makes everyone a little happier. 

So to all the retail workers out there in the trenches, prepping for Holiday Hours with longer shifts and angrier customers (because no one is happy during the holidays at stores), hang in there. We'll make it to New Years, pop a bottle of champagne and party till we drop because we made it through. 

Just remember that we're not alone, and all coupons expire.

Do you work in retail? Or have a retail horror story? Or even a nice surprise that happened at work? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy 

Life is what happens between coffee and wine

I've had this blog space open a few times this past week, and frankly have shut it without typing out a single word, aside from a title or two. 

This past week has had a lot of personal stuff hit me and come to a head emotionally, and one of the ways I cope is by turning off the internet. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I had a birthday on Monday. Or maybe it has to do with the fact that I was catching glimpses of my first book releasing 5 years ago. (RIP Hart Clan Hybrids) It could also be some seriously dark parts of the news hitting me harder than I could handle while still functioning and showering as an adult.

So I gave myself permission to stop and breathe. 

Because I don't want to be dark here. I want this blog and my books to be a spot of light, and there are times in my life, like everyone else's that I don't feel the laughter. I didn't even use a single sticker in my planner this past week, and anyone who has seen my planner knows there was something seriously off. 

I had a funnier blog planned for today, but looking at it up against the rough experience I chatted about last week, didn't make me happy with the flow. So that blog will be coming in the next couple of days. (Foreshadowing for the retail warriors out there...google Retail Robin.)

I was walking back into my office after reheating my coffee and saw the sign my parents brought back for me after their recent trip to New Orleans. "Life is what happens between coffee & wine"

This sign sits on top of my stove and usually makes me smile, but today it made me think. 

My biggest goal in life at the moment is to attempt to find a place of balance. Right now I'm on a sprint of emergency management and constant taxi service for family members. Right now I'm in the coffee part of life. Everything is energetic and fast paced. My days are busy, and I'm scrambling to write everything down that will cause a disaster if I don't handle it NOW. I'm shaky and on edge, and showering is sometimes too much to ask. Bless whoever invented dry shampoo.

But there are days and moments among the coffee, when I crash. There are days when, for my own sanity, I need to turn it all off and play a video game all day. There are moments that I have to stop and watch an hour of youtube videos and remember to breathe. There are times when I put real life away and let "Roxy" take over. I go to RWA meetings, or writing events, or even get on Discord with my CP and madly type until I can't form a complete sentence. Those moments are wine. Those days help numb the buzz of the coffee.

Those are the extremes. Those are the endcaps that push me back toward the middle. The extremes push me back to my life. Yesterday I went and spent an hour playing in a Halloween pop up store with my family. We chased a robot Chuckie around. We walked into a mini haunted house with a water-like layer of fog. We danced to Jason's stabbing music, and put on funny masks to check and see if the Grim Pizza Reaper would be a viable costume. And we laughed. We didn't accomplish anything, we didn't check anything off a To Do list. And we weren't escaping reality. It was a moment between coffee and wine. 

I've been doing meditative work and self-reflection in my journal, which I started writing in again yesterday after a few days off. I've been looking at mindfulness as an aspiration. I'm trying to take moments in the day and appreciate them for what they are instead of running ahead in my schedule or thinking about what I should be doing instead. I think mindfulness is often harder for creatives because when we're not working on our new project we're either thinking about it or feeling guilty for doing something other than completing what our muse wants next. Yesterday was the first time I've felt that moment of mindfulness in a long time. 

Our store stop wasn't on the schedule. It wasn't in the plans, and it accomplished nothing other than getting me a new shirt proclaiming my lineage as the 4th Sanderson Sister. (Tweet proof below.)


So I think I'm not going to blog about something huge today, but maybe give you something to think about. There are highs and lows all around us, and sometimes it's easier to focus on the extremes when really, it's the soft moments that can matter the most.

I've found the "Life" between my "Coffee" and "Wine" this week. And I feel like I'm working my way back toward the grind with a little more perspective. 

Take care of yourselves, and I hope you find a little joy in a moment you might not expect today. If you do, tell me about it. I'd love to hear your story.

~Roxy

Don't Shit on someone Else's Joy

This blog is going to be very short and not at all sweet.

I would say I'm mad, but mostly I'm just tired. I temper the things I say for the most part to keep my content light. I like to think I'm hilarious too, but ya' know...could just be me laughing at my own jokes. Everyone has different tastes.

But there is something that needs to be said. 

Don't Shit on Someone Else's Joy.

Just don't. If someone comes up to you and has a glint in their eyes about a book or a movie, or an activity. Don't make an ewe face. Don't ask them why they would ever enjoy such a thing. 

We're all guilty of this from time to time, and it's important to take a step back and take stock. I know friends of mine have talked about camping, and for the life of me, I can't imagine why I would pretend to be homeless voluntarily. It's just not my bag, and the way bugs like to bite me, I'm pretty sure even with the strongest bug spray I'd come back anemic.

But I try and say things like "It sounds like you had fun." Because I'm also careful not to get invited to things that are really not for me. I have learned a lot about myself and I know I need temperature controls and indoor plumbing. But I do enjoy a crackling fire and hanging with people I adore without tech taking up the day.

So I get it from that point and that's what I try to do in every situation like this. I pull a perspective where I can relate. It's really hard sometimes, but it's possible.

Yesterday I went to a fabulous event put on by a local mystery writers' group. The speaker was fantastic, and although her methods and genre were different than mine, I took a lot away from the event. Then an incident happened where I was made to feel ridiculed and looked down upon because I write romance. 

I'm not going into details, because I was a guest, and for the most part, other than feeling a bit out of place, I had a great time. I don't want to talk bad about the group or the event because it was well done and free. So I don't feel like I have a whole lot of room to complain. 

But when someone insinuates that my genre is trivial when theirs is not, just makes me so damn grumpy. Because in the end, all genre fiction has the same basic structure. We all have specific items that need to be followed to fit into the genre. We all have specific things that need to happen. Like in romance, it's an HEA. In a mystery, we need to solve the puzzle. In a thriller, the bad guy or thing has to be stopped. If you don't do those things, your readers are going to be pissed. So why is it that my genre is trivial, while yours isn't?

Just because you don't understand something doesn't mean it's bad. Just because you don't find joy in certain books, doesn't mean they're pointless. (Especially when they hold the lion's share of book buying dollars, but we won't go there.)

If you love Fifty Shades of Grey, if you love Twilight, if you love Erotica, if you love Inspirationals, or if you love Manga...embrace it. And fuck anyone who says you can't find joy in something. 

If someone finds a book or movie troubling because they believe certain themes were sending a horrible message (The article about 16 Candles comes to mind here), you might want to acknowledge it. But much of our cinematic and literary history is problematic. It's a decision you have to make for yourself. 

But if someone is coming at you because they don't think your form of entertainment is worthy for the sole reason that they don't like it...show them your favorite finger and flounce.

Like I said. This is something I know I've been guilty of in the past, and I work hard now to avoid doing it. So I wanted to share as a reminder to the collective or anyone who stumbles across my blog...

Don't Shit on Someone Else's Joy


~Roxy

Yes, Another Planner

Hi. My Name is Roxy, and I'm addicted to the Me And My Big Ideas(MAMBI) Happy Planner line. 

I came late to the planner game. Mainly because some of this shit is expensive as hell. But after getting tempted by bullet journalling, my 80's sticker loving self began to stock up on bits and bobs to add to my journal.

Bullet journalling worked until I hit the end of the book and all my carefully crafted notes were now in different volumes. Sooo...I had to either re-write them or carry multiple planners. 

My journey took me to a few different planner types, but I finally landed in the world of Happy Planner, and fell into the YouTube rabbit hole. Seriously. There are tons of MAMBI planner babes who do flip throughs, plan with me's, and ways to use extra supplies or "frankenplan". One of my favorite planner babes is "AtHomeWithQuita". A video of hers is right below here. She's far more organized than me, but I love her voice and she does thorough flip throughs and uses lots of the MAMBI line.But Quita's got a bigger budget than your girl, here. So I tend to shop sales, use coupons, and hit up the clearance bins. Doing all of that means I don't always have the latest and greatest, but sometimes I splurge. 

When I saw the new Happy Planner mini lines this year, I was so damn excited because the previous years' minis were horizontal, and that's just not my jam.

THIS year, we have vertical planning in the minis, along with a planner theme that makes me smile. 

First, I ended up grabbing a deluxe cover, because my Joann's had them on ultra clearance. I picked up this hot pink "Hustle" cover for less than $7 after tax. I hug it occasionally. Don't judge me. I had a mini notebook that I carried around with daily planning sheets for busy days, but I wanted a full monthly planner with me so I could have my future plans with me on the go. If I wanted to make plans with friends or check into my availability to do an event six months from now, I didn't have an easy way to do that.

I had been using a ring binder, but after using the disc systems for my book bibles and my everyday planner, I was ready to make the switch. 

Then I saw a flip through of a mini with vertical lined planning pages, AND it was covered in girl power inspirational quotes. I stalked my local Joann's daily and snatched that puppy up as soon as it came out.  The fact that it perfectly matched my cover with pink discs...well, it was meant to be. The cover, and each of the monthly tabs all have inspiring quotes. The decoration is just enough that I don't feel the need to cover it with stickers. And the aesthetic is completely me. Well...for now, anyway.

It's something I can jot notes in and keep details and lists when I'm out of the house. And who doesn't need a planner that gives them all kinds of happy feels?
Just to pull a couple quotes from this little gem...

"Sometimes the bravest and most important thing you can do is just show up." ~Brene Brown

"I love the person I've become, because I fought to become her." 
~ Kaci Diane

There are a ton more, and all of them are next to a handy dandy little spot to put a monthly goal. 

I like the idea of pausing to take stock every month and getting myself prepped to kick ass. 

Unfortunately this little gem doesn't start until January, but because I've become addicted to this line, I have some spare undated inserts, and traded out the last quarter of next year for enough pages to get me through the last quarter of this year.

I get to start using the weekly spreads in just a few days, and I'm stoked.

Yeah, I know. I should be writing. But hey, at least I have the perfect set up to get myself organized now. 

(said every procrastinating perfectionist ever...)
What do you use for your planning system? Do you use paper planners? Are you team vertical or team horizontal? Spiral bound, disc bound, or perfect bound? Or are you straight up digital?

I'd love to hear about it. And if you have any favorite planner channels, make sure to send them my way. I need a good binge.

​~Roxy