P.J. Roscoe's Blog, page 17

Honourable Mention

Well, I am speechless right now, so will write instead!! I entered a competition months ago, New England Book Festival and although I didn't win, 'Echoes' got an Honourable Mention - along with other books, but still, an acknowledgement surely??
There I go, making it less than what it is. Someone, perhaps a few people have read the book and enjoyed it - not enough to win, but enough to say, 'hey, that was actually good, worth a mention'.
I feel honoured and look forward to continued success...Echoes

new cover

I've been working on learning how to do covers because however much I like the design, it wasn't working and I had to find that out the hard way - everyone is not like me!! Its an expensive lesson because I have 35 books sitting in my front room with the old, boring design - giveaways perhaps? The new designs have gone through many changes this last week - until finally moving the design to the back cover as a watermark and finding a photograph I'd taken years ago and placing that on the front. I love green and trees and it's better, but still not great...Maybe? Feeback will tell.

If I could have superimposed a shadow of a tower somewhere in the background and shadowy figures that would be perfect??? But, as yet, not enough brain cells to undersatand the very hard process! Lets see what readers think??

Reaching out...

December comes around again and I can be found sitting in my chair, typing - nothing changes, but oh how happy I am when I'm here!
I may not be happy with lack of bestseller title...Yet, but I can't complain - when I am writing, I feel alive and surely that's what it's all about???
There are a number of people out there, beyond my window, who have read, or are reading my book, Echoes and it's a glorious feeling. What job can compare?
Well, as a counsellor, that comes pretty close - excellent feeling when a client tell me they don't need me anymore - they are ready to live again. Much the same when I hear that I have people waiting for my second novel, because they loved the first!!
So, I'll keep on going, keep on writing and unloading my bursting head and get those stories out there...Here I go...Echoes

Frustration is setting in

Hello to all writers out there - is this normal? To feel doubt in your ability as a writer? I am now questioning the cover of my book - I love the picture, but wonder if its not 'eye-catching' enough? Should there be more detail perhaps? More colour? More clues as to the story within?

I am thinking about a box with a cake inside. Do I look at the box first, or the cake? Is it the box that draws me to the shelf to have a closer look, or is it the knowledge that the cake inside is one of my favourites and therefore, I know I'll like it??

Feedback would be deeply appreciated from fellow authors. I have asked others and have had a mixed response - to 'yes, it is a bit bland, needs more colour, trees, castle etc, to 'no' it is an intriguing picture and draws me in wondering what it means...?

I am confident about the story, but the sales don't reflect this, or lack of sales I should say.

And that's another thing, do people say to your face, they will definately buy the book, and then they don't? Sooooo many people have done that to me, I am losing trust in the human race!!

O.k, I think...?

Well, it's October and I've sold some more books, I did a little 'whoohoo!' when I saw the balance go up, yet I am feeling tired and deflated - why? Is the reality setting in where I am seeing my dreams fading away quicker than mist? Did I truly believe it would be so easy to become a best-seller when the cast majority of humans on this planet have never heard of P.J Roscoe, never-mind that I write!

I read how other writers have 'done it', achieved the dream by selling thousands when they too only expected to sell a handful - so what did they have that I don't? Computer skills? Knowledge? Time?

I reach out on twitter, Amazon, e-mails, facebook and face to face (which is great because I've met some lovely people) and just for a moment, I can almost believe that I can make a living, a decent one as a writer of supernatural fiction - but am I deluded? Or is it early days and I am impatient as usual? I hear my family and close friends who know me well, shout 'YES!' you are impatient - give it time, keep reaching and let the ripples reach the right people in time - but never stop...So, here I go again on my own...!!!?

Work, work and selling myself but still in limbo...

I have to admit to feeling deflated; sales are not rocketing off the shelves as I'd dreamt over and over in those blissful few moments when I could shut my eyes and wander effortlessly into another, more satisfying world. Being a writer is not the same as being a successful writer...Or is it?

I learnt on a writing course in the Spring from likeminded ladies, that writing must be a passion regardless of payment - writing for the joy of it. I didn't quite agree at first, as I would like to become successful enough to earn a living, so for me, writing HAD to succeed. But after a while, I began to change my mind. Not about the success, but that writing had to be a joy or what was the point. Stress from lack of sales can lead to tension, headaches, stress and a plethora of negative emotions - none of which I care for.

So, I stepped back and looked at my writing again and thus, 'Echoes' was reborn. Not because I wanted money (even if that would be a wonderful happening) But because it had to be written and written properly, before I could let it go.

Having let it go and felt good about the story, the deflation I feel comes from others not jumping onto my band wagon and agreeing wholeheartedly that my book is excellent and here's my money for the privilage of reading your masterpiece!

Is this wrong to feel this way? Do other writer's?

So, I shall continue to write and fulfill my destiny as a novelist as I try to find the time to edit my second book, 'Freya's Child' between selling myself and networking and hoping, constantly hoping, that one fine day, my writing will be truly seen and appreciated by the masses.

A new month and fear is setting in...Is this normal?

Well, been a busy few weeks having to take breaks from writing and networking to holidays and a festival - oh what joy it was, but oh so terrifying. To be away from the sites and potential readers/buyers of my book was a horrifying concept - and this is soooo wrong. I should be able to have a break andchill with a nice glass of chilled wine or walk around a lovely stately home without my thoughts wandering back to the potential misses my absence might be creating!

Also, all of these absences have left me with three days to prepare for a book launch - well, I say prepare, I have no idea what to read my audience and this is crucial - any ideas from other authors??? I was also informed that after the 'show' they may expect nibbles back at my house - well, I hope not all of them or there wont be room for me, the author!

Champagne and vol e vonts it is then - but first, a big cup ofcoffee rom thecafe and a chat with anyone who wants to chat...Ideas welcome

Sore arm - but is it worth it?

I seem to be suffering with a very sore elbow joint - I expect its moving the mouse around - click, move, click etc. Pain, they say, no pain, no gain - but is it the same for writers? I have barely sold any books - and await my book launch with both dread and hope - Not sure which one is higher rated?

I wonder though, how many of us potential writers feel this pain - not so much my elbow, but the pain of wanting something so badly and as yet, nothing has come of it?

The questions that move frantically around my head keep my awake at night:

What am I doing wrong?

Do I need to become a computer expert?

If so, why can't i learn quicker?

And if i can't be an expert blogger/twitterer/forum campaigner etc, does that mean i will die in the water of failure?

And if that's the case - why?

Or, is word of mouth more preferable?

But to get people talking about me, they need to read my books so how do i reach my audiences?

And it goes around again...!

I know i am not the first and have no doubts that I will be the last to pull my hair out with frustration but oh how I dream of the simplicity of writing a bloody good story!

When in my dreams an agent would read about me and want me because they could see my potential and then a publisher would quickly follow as would the book deals and the success would be comfortable and not too intrusive - It's good to dream...

'Echoes' is but the first dream - dare I awaken from the rest...?

6th August 2012 Learning mode

O.k, so, here it is brain - learn something new today...Please. If not, then it will begin to feel like I'm going around in my own little circle and not reaching the human race who read.

What the **** does a 'hashtag' do? How do I blog successfully? Meaning that I reach other potential people?? I am reading various articles on line, but to someone who is not literate in computer jargon - it can seem like I'm staring at gobbledegook with no meaning!

I am an intelligent woman, yet I feel so unintelligent right now as I roll around in the mud of technology, unable to stand up. I search for that helping hand who can pull me to my feet and steady me...

3rd August

I feel a bit low - a tiny bit unhappy and a tad worried - what does that make me??

I see the frightening words

'No sales recorded for this month' and it terrifies me - how to reach the millions of potential readers in Europe and America?? Others have managed, while others have failed - what is the secret? Perserverence? Resilience? Or who they know??

Do I sound bitter?? I hope not, but on reading my words it could be misconstrued. I wish them success, but i wish myself success too - I'm just not sure how to get it. Will I look back on this blog in later years and smile with fondness as I see the sales of my books soar? I sincerely hope so...

So, you, in the future...Tell me how you did it!!!!!!!!!!!!!