Pat Hatt's Blog, page 164
April 3, 2015
The Big C On A Spree!
So continuing on with things that get a rise is the big C that picks everyone off like flies. Humans or animals we all get it. For a to z we go on a cancer bit.
Cancer, a downer,
Even for an out of towner.
Can strike at any time,
Even if in your prime.
But that we know.
Can even get it in a toe.
The human body is grand.
Too bad you can't kill it with sand.
Instead radiate yourself.
Become a bump on a shelf.
Quality of life down the tube.
Enjoy a nice little ice cube.
Years upon years of giving,
And barely any more are living.
Cancer is still wide spread,
And almost as many drop dead.
Last a little longer maybe.
And can get rid of it if caught early.
But other than that,
It seems to rack up another stat.
But don't let that deter.
Sit there and purr.
Help fund cancer research.
We'll leave it in the lurch.
Billions of dollars a year,
With nothing to show for it we fear.
Still the same way to kill it.
Fight body shit with body shit.
But trust and donate.
Add to our collection plate.
Fund cancer with each bill.
We'll still let it kill.
Then on the flip side,
Fads are far and wide.
Can cure cancer by drinking your own pee.
Sadly, I actually saw that spree.
Nuts on both sides.
Both taking people for rides.
And the why I think you know,
It all comes back to the dough.
There is my rant on that. Cancer has been seen by more than a few close to the cat. Damn, thing is everywhere. Without it, poof billions lost to the big pharma lair. Will there ever be a cure for any of it? Not until something really bad happens then out a cure they'll spit. At least that is my take and sass. Cancer can just kiss my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
Cancer, a downer,
Even for an out of towner.
Can strike at any time,
Even if in your prime.
But that we know.
Can even get it in a toe.
The human body is grand.
Too bad you can't kill it with sand.
Instead radiate yourself.
Become a bump on a shelf.
Quality of life down the tube.
Enjoy a nice little ice cube.
Years upon years of giving,
And barely any more are living.
Cancer is still wide spread,
And almost as many drop dead.
Last a little longer maybe.
And can get rid of it if caught early.
But other than that,
It seems to rack up another stat.
But don't let that deter.
Sit there and purr.
Help fund cancer research.
We'll leave it in the lurch.
Billions of dollars a year,
With nothing to show for it we fear.
Still the same way to kill it.
Fight body shit with body shit.
But trust and donate.
Add to our collection plate.
Fund cancer with each bill.
We'll still let it kill.
Then on the flip side,
Fads are far and wide.
Can cure cancer by drinking your own pee.
Sadly, I actually saw that spree.
Nuts on both sides.
Both taking people for rides.
And the why I think you know,
It all comes back to the dough.
There is my rant on that. Cancer has been seen by more than a few close to the cat. Damn, thing is everywhere. Without it, poof billions lost to the big pharma lair. Will there ever be a cure for any of it? Not until something really bad happens then out a cure they'll spit. At least that is my take and sass. Cancer can just kiss my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
April 2, 2015
On Today's Plate, A Blogland Trait!
Back for B in the a to z. I know that isn't a surprise to thee. Considering I've had these done since October or so. But on with the B at my show. B is for blogland as many new bloggers seem to have their head up their you know or need a helping hand.
Look at me, I'm new.
I haven't a clue.
Or I just don't want to.
Here, buy what's in view.
Buy my book.
Buy it for your nook.
Don't let it dwindle.
Buy it for kindle.
Buying is the name of the game.
Buy so I can get fame.
Nope, I won't visit you.
Nope, I'm not through.
Buy, buy, buy.
I sit upon high.
Buy, buy, buy.
Do more than try.
Pffft do they have a brain cell?
They are lucky they can spell.
Maybe they sold them all in a sale?
Either way, one big fail!
Blogging seems to have gone the way,
Of many just trying to get pay.
Wanting this and that,
With no appreciation for anything at their blog mat.
When the cat started it was one big community at play,
Even when new ones joined the fray.
Now that sure doesn't seem to be the way,
As all are after nothing but pay.
Do they really think it will work?
They are nothing but a wannabe spammy jerk.
Maybe not even a wannabe,
For some who shout from sea to sea.
Is their head too far up their butt?
Maybe it got stuck at their hut?
Many new ones sure don't make the cut.
It's more fun to get butt sniffed by a mutt.
They seem here to stay.
All just trying to get pay.
Not saying a word otherwise,
And the idiots expect people to come like flies.
Seen it at your bay? Think the cat is too harsh on them today? Nah, I didn't think so. Many just start and expect people to show. Guess what though? Not gonna happen and you'll eat crow. I wonder if that is a tastier treat than bass? Either way, such bloggers are ignored by my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
Look at me, I'm new.
I haven't a clue.
Or I just don't want to.
Here, buy what's in view.
Buy my book.
Buy it for your nook.
Don't let it dwindle.
Buy it for kindle.
Buying is the name of the game.
Buy so I can get fame.
Nope, I won't visit you.
Nope, I'm not through.
Buy, buy, buy.
I sit upon high.
Buy, buy, buy.
Do more than try.
Pffft do they have a brain cell?
They are lucky they can spell.
Maybe they sold them all in a sale?
Either way, one big fail!
Blogging seems to have gone the way,
Of many just trying to get pay.
Wanting this and that,
With no appreciation for anything at their blog mat.
When the cat started it was one big community at play,
Even when new ones joined the fray.
Now that sure doesn't seem to be the way,
As all are after nothing but pay.
Do they really think it will work?
They are nothing but a wannabe spammy jerk.
Maybe not even a wannabe,
For some who shout from sea to sea.
Is their head too far up their butt?
Maybe it got stuck at their hut?
Many new ones sure don't make the cut.
It's more fun to get butt sniffed by a mutt.
They seem here to stay.
All just trying to get pay.
Not saying a word otherwise,
And the idiots expect people to come like flies.
Seen it at your bay? Think the cat is too harsh on them today? Nah, I didn't think so. Many just start and expect people to show. Guess what though? Not gonna happen and you'll eat crow. I wonder if that is a tastier treat than bass? Either way, such bloggers are ignored by my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
April 1, 2015
Let's Adverties The Lies!
So the a to z has begun its run. The cat has decided to give a bit of a theme a run. They will be mainly topics that can get people going. You know I like such a showing. Nothing is off limits at my sea. So for A we tackle advertising and human severe gullibility.
Advertising is the way,
To make lots of pay.
But 90% of it is a lie,
And some may even make you die.
As seen on Dr. Oz!
That should get an applause.
You see such ads everywhere.
Guess what? 95% are a fake affair.
Will make you lose weight fast.
It will be a blast.
Not to mention kill your liver.
But there is no need to shiver.
You will get rich quick.
$5,455.56 an hour if your slick.
Just sign up today.
I guarantee you pay.
Forget what I am saying.
Forget what is even playing.
Just look at that model in the pic.
Don't they just make everything click?
Yeah, you'll look like that.
Just use our product, stat.
Sex sells everything for us.
No muss, no fuss.
Oh and even better for you,
A celebrity endorses it too.
Damn, you are on a roll.
Come and take this truck for a stroll.
Such and such a diva drives it.
It has to be the umm spit.
It will get you all the girls.
It can even do twirls.
Forget the "do not try this at home."
The sexy outcome will still foam.
Believe in what we say.
We want you happy at the end of the day.
You'll look and feel your best.
We beat all the rest.
Who needs fat people showing our stuff.
I think you've heard enough.
Pffft you humans must buy into the nonsense though, as this crap keeps continuing to flow. Sure beats the cat why because there is no magic pill or product that will rain down from the sky. You want something you have to do the work. Some things may be a perk, but they aren't going to go poof and make you look or feel or whatever like what is shown. So just put down your telephone. Save money and give such advertisers some nasty gas. It works well for my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
Advertising is the way,
To make lots of pay.
But 90% of it is a lie,
And some may even make you die.
As seen on Dr. Oz!
That should get an applause.
You see such ads everywhere.
Guess what? 95% are a fake affair.
Will make you lose weight fast.
It will be a blast.
Not to mention kill your liver.
But there is no need to shiver.
You will get rich quick.
$5,455.56 an hour if your slick.
Just sign up today.
I guarantee you pay.
Forget what I am saying.
Forget what is even playing.
Just look at that model in the pic.
Don't they just make everything click?
Yeah, you'll look like that.
Just use our product, stat.
Sex sells everything for us.
No muss, no fuss.
Oh and even better for you,
A celebrity endorses it too.
Damn, you are on a roll.
Come and take this truck for a stroll.
Such and such a diva drives it.
It has to be the umm spit.
It will get you all the girls.
It can even do twirls.
Forget the "do not try this at home."
The sexy outcome will still foam.
Believe in what we say.
We want you happy at the end of the day.
You'll look and feel your best.
We beat all the rest.
Who needs fat people showing our stuff.
I think you've heard enough.
Pffft you humans must buy into the nonsense though, as this crap keeps continuing to flow. Sure beats the cat why because there is no magic pill or product that will rain down from the sky. You want something you have to do the work. Some things may be a perk, but they aren't going to go poof and make you look or feel or whatever like what is shown. So just put down your telephone. Save money and give such advertisers some nasty gas. It works well for my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
March 31, 2015
The Glory Of Story!
The cat has something to say, yeah I know I do everyday, but today it was just strange. It seems things wanted to change. The cat was not impressed at all. I'd rather visit that thing you call a mall.
I jumped off the bed,
After causing Pat dread.
Yeah, I tramped on his head.
Never fear, nothing bled.
I saw the floor.
I saw the door.
So I leaped in the air.
A standard morning affair.
Then there was a hole.
It ruined my stroll.
It appeared out of nowhere.
It sucked me away from my lair.
There I was,
In a land of fuzz.
It was worst than dust,
Or engine rust.
It was fuzz.
The fuzz could buzz.
The buzzing was loud.
The fuzz was proud.
The fuzz could talk.
It could also gawk.
It was alive.
How would I survive?
I ate the fuzz.
Fuzz that never was.
But more came.
The fuzz wasn't tame.
It gave me gas,
Right out my ass.
Yeah, where else would it come,
Than out my bum?
I used that as a rocket.
Poking the fuzz in the eye socket.
I flew into the air,
Burning up the fuzzy lair.
Then I saw the hole.
I did a little mid air roll,
And into it I went,
Telling the fuzz to get bent.
Now I have to clean myself for a week. The fuzz isn't for the meek. You just don't know what you'll find in a hole. Those things should be cleaned by some worker mole. Hey, I survived the curiosity of a cat. Isn't that where it's at? So fall in any holes? Get visited by any cleaner moles? I also got to the hole before poor sleepy Cass. I am just such a helpful little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
I jumped off the bed,
After causing Pat dread.
Yeah, I tramped on his head.
Never fear, nothing bled.
I saw the floor.
I saw the door.
So I leaped in the air.
A standard morning affair.
Then there was a hole.
It ruined my stroll.
It appeared out of nowhere.
It sucked me away from my lair.
There I was,
In a land of fuzz.
It was worst than dust,
Or engine rust.
It was fuzz.
The fuzz could buzz.
The buzzing was loud.
The fuzz was proud.
The fuzz could talk.
It could also gawk.
It was alive.
How would I survive?
I ate the fuzz.
Fuzz that never was.
But more came.
The fuzz wasn't tame.
It gave me gas,
Right out my ass.
Yeah, where else would it come,
Than out my bum?
I used that as a rocket.
Poking the fuzz in the eye socket.
I flew into the air,
Burning up the fuzzy lair.
Then I saw the hole.
I did a little mid air roll,
And into it I went,
Telling the fuzz to get bent.
Now I have to clean myself for a week. The fuzz isn't for the meek. You just don't know what you'll find in a hole. Those things should be cleaned by some worker mole. Hey, I survived the curiosity of a cat. Isn't that where it's at? So fall in any holes? Get visited by any cleaner moles? I also got to the hole before poor sleepy Cass. I am just such a helpful little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
March 30, 2015
Grocery Shop Until You Drop!
There are all kinds of things about, even a scream and shout. You just have to look. One place you find them is the grocery store nook. Yeah, the gawker's scary place. This won't put a smile on his face.
It's grocery shopping day,
The fridge has become bare.
That processed food is just A OK.
Forget the mixed in rat hair.
It's grocery shopping day,
Your credit score is calling.
Credits cards want out to play.
Who can deny those prices falling.
Everywhere the carts are pushing.
It's the end of being stress free.
Parents all around are shushing,
Some kid always has to pee.
Well it's grocery shopping day.
Your cart is already half full.
Why not try the sample tray,
Grab some testicles of a bull.
You might find some more deals,
Or something completely gluten free.
But even with your cart's squeaky wheels,
With wheat you still strongly agree.
Oh it's grocery shopping day,
Your limit has been met.
It's almost time to pay,
There's just that thing for the pet.
It's grocery shopping day,
The line up has you waiting.
With your fingers you play,
Well reading who plastic face is dating.
It's grocery shopping day.
Your turn has finally come.
You load the belt ready to pay,
Well talking out your bum.
It's grocery shopping day,
Your credit card has been maxed.
But you'll pay that next May,
After all you were just taxed.
The fridge has been totally filled,
The best before dates are one day away.
Your family will be thrilled.
Until next grocery shopping day.
Now doesn't that make you just want to go out and shop until you drop? Would you rather do the bunny hop? Enjoy shopping at the store forevermore. The cat will stay home and let you humans roam. That way he won't end up giving slow pokes sass. But that would be fun for my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
It's grocery shopping day,
The fridge has become bare.
That processed food is just A OK.
Forget the mixed in rat hair.
It's grocery shopping day,
Your credit score is calling.
Credits cards want out to play.
Who can deny those prices falling.
Everywhere the carts are pushing.
It's the end of being stress free.
Parents all around are shushing,
Some kid always has to pee.
Well it's grocery shopping day.
Your cart is already half full.
Why not try the sample tray,
Grab some testicles of a bull.
You might find some more deals,
Or something completely gluten free.
But even with your cart's squeaky wheels,
With wheat you still strongly agree.
Oh it's grocery shopping day,
Your limit has been met.
It's almost time to pay,
There's just that thing for the pet.
It's grocery shopping day,
The line up has you waiting.
With your fingers you play,
Well reading who plastic face is dating.
It's grocery shopping day.
Your turn has finally come.
You load the belt ready to pay,
Well talking out your bum.
It's grocery shopping day,
Your credit card has been maxed.
But you'll pay that next May,
After all you were just taxed.
The fridge has been totally filled,
The best before dates are one day away.
Your family will be thrilled.
Until next grocery shopping day.
Now doesn't that make you just want to go out and shop until you drop? Would you rather do the bunny hop? Enjoy shopping at the store forevermore. The cat will stay home and let you humans roam. That way he won't end up giving slow pokes sass. But that would be fun for my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
March 29, 2015
A Chance Dance!
So by chance you might have thought of this. Maybe by chance you got bliss. Maybe by chance you missed getting hit by a bus. Chance just has so much fuss.
Chance has odds.
No fishing rods.
No fake things like luck.
Odds make or break a buck.
Chance encounter takes place.
A chance you see a familiar face.
What are the odds of that?
Sure beats the cat.
Work them out.
Math isn't what I shout.
What you want me to?
Okay, just for you.
One million to one.
Your chance of dying by the sun.
Two million to three,
Your chance of dying while you pee.
Don't you love odds?
Are they made up by cods?
One person dies by this.
So now your chances are this bliss.
Chance of winning the jackpot.
Pffft better chance of catching dry rot.
Or turning into a robot.
Maybe getting hit by lightning on the spot.
See, chance can be compared as well.
Doesn't chance make all things swell?
What is the chance you agree?
Fifteen to one I see.
Wow, you are mean.
Such chance aversion at my scene.
You don't like math?
Prefer knowing the chance of dying in the bath?
Chance runs every place,
Odds from here to outer space.
Chance of aliens probing you?
About seven billion to two.
I knew you'd want that stat.
No need to thank the cat.
Chances are I am done.
Any chance you had fun?
Chance and odds seem to always be at play. But pfffft to the odds they give I say. They are pulled out of thin air sometimes. Get better advice from mimes. Yep, say nothing at all. That is the chance at your hall. When numbers are involved chance is at play, like the lottery at any bay. The dying sort could happen whenever. You just up the chances with each endeavor. Isn't chance worse than a case of gas? Chances are no when talking about my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
Chance has odds.
No fishing rods.
No fake things like luck.
Odds make or break a buck.
Chance encounter takes place.
A chance you see a familiar face.
What are the odds of that?
Sure beats the cat.
Work them out.
Math isn't what I shout.
What you want me to?
Okay, just for you.
One million to one.
Your chance of dying by the sun.
Two million to three,
Your chance of dying while you pee.
Don't you love odds?
Are they made up by cods?
One person dies by this.
So now your chances are this bliss.
Chance of winning the jackpot.
Pffft better chance of catching dry rot.
Or turning into a robot.
Maybe getting hit by lightning on the spot.
See, chance can be compared as well.
Doesn't chance make all things swell?
What is the chance you agree?
Fifteen to one I see.
Wow, you are mean.
Such chance aversion at my scene.
You don't like math?
Prefer knowing the chance of dying in the bath?
Chance runs every place,
Odds from here to outer space.
Chance of aliens probing you?
About seven billion to two.
I knew you'd want that stat.
No need to thank the cat.
Chances are I am done.
Any chance you had fun?
Chance and odds seem to always be at play. But pfffft to the odds they give I say. They are pulled out of thin air sometimes. Get better advice from mimes. Yep, say nothing at all. That is the chance at your hall. When numbers are involved chance is at play, like the lottery at any bay. The dying sort could happen whenever. You just up the chances with each endeavor. Isn't chance worse than a case of gas? Chances are no when talking about my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
March 28, 2015
We Estimate That We Control Your Fate!
So the cat had to call for a number thingy the other day, yeah Pat did because my meowing only goes one way, and the first thing they said was we'll get to you when we get out of bed. What, don't believe me? Just follow along with my rhyming spree.
Call #1 was such fun,
They said oopsy you're done.
Call back tomorrow.
Your time we will borrow.
Call #2 a repeat.
Hates those at my street.
But beats a remake.
Drown those in a lake.
Call #3, a big yippee.
They are at their sea.
Oopsy, still a bad fate,
Because you have to wait.
30-60 minutes is your wait time.
That is not a crime.
You are reminded it is an estimation.
Shhh not that much of a guestimation.
Just sit and hold the phone to your ear,
We will soon be near.
The phone companies will dance with glee.
Long distance charges added up on thee.
Bah, forget toll free.
We just want to screw thee.
Not in a fun way.
Screw you out of pay.
Maybe you'll give up.
Then more money in our cup.
Damn stubborn cat.
Go chew on a rat.
You still here?
Gonna be another 30 minutes I fear.
We said that 60 minutes ago.
What do we know?
Not much I guess.
Hey, at least we confess.
Enjoy the tune while we slumber.
You will soon get your number.
A number for another number.
Like swapping a pickle for a cucumber?
One is bigger I suppose.
Wait while we put on some clothes.
Yeah, Pat had to hold the phone up for a few hours. My he sure has such powers. That whole half a pound phone might make weak humans groan. What was it for? To kick the IRS out of my shore. Get that EIN number so they don't take 30% of my dough. Damn withholding crap at my Canadian show. And turns out you no longer need it anyway, as Amazon changed it so my tax id here will suffice on display. All that for nothing at all. At least I wasn't charged long distance for the call. So now I get the whole, very small, mass. If we're lucky at least it can buy cat food for my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
Call #1 was such fun,
They said oopsy you're done.
Call back tomorrow.
Your time we will borrow.
Call #2 a repeat.
Hates those at my street.
But beats a remake.
Drown those in a lake.
Call #3, a big yippee.
They are at their sea.
Oopsy, still a bad fate,
Because you have to wait.
30-60 minutes is your wait time.
That is not a crime.
You are reminded it is an estimation.
Shhh not that much of a guestimation.
Just sit and hold the phone to your ear,
We will soon be near.
The phone companies will dance with glee.
Long distance charges added up on thee.
Bah, forget toll free.
We just want to screw thee.
Not in a fun way.
Screw you out of pay.
Maybe you'll give up.
Then more money in our cup.
Damn stubborn cat.
Go chew on a rat.
You still here?
Gonna be another 30 minutes I fear.
We said that 60 minutes ago.
What do we know?
Not much I guess.
Hey, at least we confess.
Enjoy the tune while we slumber.
You will soon get your number.
A number for another number.
Like swapping a pickle for a cucumber?
One is bigger I suppose.
Wait while we put on some clothes.
Yeah, Pat had to hold the phone up for a few hours. My he sure has such powers. That whole half a pound phone might make weak humans groan. What was it for? To kick the IRS out of my shore. Get that EIN number so they don't take 30% of my dough. Damn withholding crap at my Canadian show. And turns out you no longer need it anyway, as Amazon changed it so my tax id here will suffice on display. All that for nothing at all. At least I wasn't charged long distance for the call. So now I get the whole, very small, mass. If we're lucky at least it can buy cat food for my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
March 27, 2015
The Perk Does Not Work!
Ever see a cartoon and think that would be grand? Would it not be fun to do that across the land? What is that? Just stick with the cat.
Popeye chewed away,
All through the day.
Spinach made his muscles grow.
Real life = no go!
Now is that song in your head?
Oh the dread.
Could go back to bed.
Don't bump your head.
Walk in a tub of ice.
That is some nice.
It never melts at all.
Be hard to pee at your hall.
Get things dropped on your head.
But you aren't good and dead.
Just burnt and crispy a bit,
Followed by a meep meep fit.
You have no ass.
So nothing to pass.
Easy as can be.
Look at Donkey Kong if you don't believe me.
You can go inside a mouth.
It won't stunt your growth.
Can see how insides work.
That has to be a perk.
You can eat all day,
Never getting fat at your bay.
Eat whatever you want.
That be nice at your haunt.
Plus you can have 1000 episodes done.
They will always rerun,
And from start to end,
You're still the same age, my friend.
No wardrobe to worry about.
No need to twist and shout.
Just wear the same thing every day.
Lets you be cheap at your bay.
And maybe easiest of all,
Everyone talks your language on the wall.
Dubbed just for you.
No language barriers to go through.
Don't you want cartoon powers? You could live life for many extra hours. Wear the same clothes every single day. Spinach will also make you look like Rambo at your bay. Plus like the two light hearted fools you could be all mass. How they get around with no legs or arms sure beats my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
Popeye chewed away,
All through the day.
Spinach made his muscles grow.
Real life = no go!
Now is that song in your head?
Oh the dread.
Could go back to bed.
Don't bump your head.
Walk in a tub of ice.
That is some nice.
It never melts at all.
Be hard to pee at your hall.
Get things dropped on your head.
But you aren't good and dead.
Just burnt and crispy a bit,
Followed by a meep meep fit.
You have no ass.
So nothing to pass.
Easy as can be.
Look at Donkey Kong if you don't believe me.
You can go inside a mouth.
It won't stunt your growth.
Can see how insides work.
That has to be a perk.
You can eat all day,
Never getting fat at your bay.
Eat whatever you want.
That be nice at your haunt.
Plus you can have 1000 episodes done.
They will always rerun,
And from start to end,
You're still the same age, my friend.
No wardrobe to worry about.
No need to twist and shout.
Just wear the same thing every day.
Lets you be cheap at your bay.
And maybe easiest of all,
Everyone talks your language on the wall.
Dubbed just for you.
No language barriers to go through.
Don't you want cartoon powers? You could live life for many extra hours. Wear the same clothes every single day. Spinach will also make you look like Rambo at your bay. Plus like the two light hearted fools you could be all mass. How they get around with no legs or arms sure beats my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
March 26, 2015
If You Were A Rock. A Blue Guy Mock!
The blue guy came after the cat a while ago, did you think I'd let that go? Whining about his little shoe. Maybe he is part kangaroo? A blue kangaroo would be a sight at a zoo. So the cat will mock and the picture may even shock.
If you were a rock, what kind of rock would you be?Would you stick to a foot or fall on me?Would you be pointy and sharp as a tack,Or be one with your great big rock pack?Would you be large and ready to please,Or would you crumble and be one big tease?Maybe brag that you were around when dinos roamed the Earth,Or be smashed to bits and call it giving birth.Would you end up really frail and bitter,Becoming some clumping kitty litter?How about your texture and curves?Would you be smooth and round, remember, rocks, pervs.Will you prick me if I touch you with a finger.Or will you like it and let me linger?Would you be in a collection of some collector,Or suck up some metal and fool a metal detector?Would you hide gold beneath or behind you,Preventing thieves from stealing it two by two?Maybe hide a body or something more.Could be the Fountain of Youth or another trinket of lore.Would you carve yourself into a headstone,Listening for eternity as ghosts moan?Would you gather with others to make a good bed,Where any traveler can come to rest their weary head? Would you protect lovers from a detection,As behind you they hide with an umm err erection?
Or would you sit and stareAnd not bother going anywhere?Would you make rocks talk about you.By not giving a whoopdi friggin doo?Would you stand on your own without a care,Or find another and make a rocky pair?Would you let others get a good whiffAnd the drop them off your cliff?Tell me...One, two, three...What kind of rock would you be?
Have you decided what rock you will be? Are you like me and scared the blue guy has multiple personality disorder at his sea? Or maybe he just likes to play dress up. Whatever fills his cup. The cat will stick to being crass, passing gas with some sass and as always, being a little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
If you were a rock, what kind of rock would you be?Would you stick to a foot or fall on me?Would you be pointy and sharp as a tack,Or be one with your great big rock pack?Would you be large and ready to please,Or would you crumble and be one big tease?Maybe brag that you were around when dinos roamed the Earth,Or be smashed to bits and call it giving birth.Would you end up really frail and bitter,Becoming some clumping kitty litter?How about your texture and curves?Would you be smooth and round, remember, rocks, pervs.Will you prick me if I touch you with a finger.Or will you like it and let me linger?Would you be in a collection of some collector,Or suck up some metal and fool a metal detector?Would you hide gold beneath or behind you,Preventing thieves from stealing it two by two?Maybe hide a body or something more.Could be the Fountain of Youth or another trinket of lore.Would you carve yourself into a headstone,Listening for eternity as ghosts moan?Would you gather with others to make a good bed,Where any traveler can come to rest their weary head? Would you protect lovers from a detection,As behind you they hide with an umm err erection?
Or would you sit and stareAnd not bother going anywhere?Would you make rocks talk about you.By not giving a whoopdi friggin doo?Would you stand on your own without a care,Or find another and make a rocky pair?Would you let others get a good whiffAnd the drop them off your cliff?Tell me...One, two, three...What kind of rock would you be?
Have you decided what rock you will be? Are you like me and scared the blue guy has multiple personality disorder at his sea? Or maybe he just likes to play dress up. Whatever fills his cup. The cat will stick to being crass, passing gas with some sass and as always, being a little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
March 25, 2015
The Pest of Rest!
After yesterday are you all rhymed out from my play? Nah, I didn't think so. You know there will always be another post to show. But for those that can't past the test here is a little rest.
Stay in bed.
Rest your head.
Let the body stretch.
Don't play fetch.
A little air,
Screw the hair.
Screw the clothes.
Umm curl toes.
Wait, that's not rest.
But passes any test.
Did you stutter?
Okay, out of the gutter.
Now rest within.
Forget the woes at your bin.
Think happy thoughts.
But don't think lots.
I really just said that?
A bumper sticker cat.
A bumper to a humper?
Won't be a umm grumper.
Unless you're grumpy blue.
Then that's nothing new.
Now rest your fingers.
Nothing new lingers.
Sing a tune.
Be like Betsy and dance with a spoon.
Even at rest exercise be nice.
But no need to do it twice.
Relax in a chair.
Can still be bare.
Just pull the curtain.
Of that be certain.
Eat and be Mary.
Play with dogs that are hairy.
Hmm got that wrong?
Blame Donkey Kong.
And viola it's the next day.
Things came what may.
And guess what?
Nothing exploded at your hut.
Rest for the cat? We get plenty of that. May not seem so but when you are ahead plenty of rest can show. Things will always get done and then more things will need to be given a run. It never ends until you are dead. Then you rest in a permanent bed. So take a day, come what may, relax and let go of some gas. Trust my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
Stay in bed.
Rest your head.
Let the body stretch.
Don't play fetch.
A little air,
Screw the hair.
Screw the clothes.
Umm curl toes.
Wait, that's not rest.
But passes any test.
Did you stutter?
Okay, out of the gutter.
Now rest within.
Forget the woes at your bin.
Think happy thoughts.
But don't think lots.
I really just said that?
A bumper sticker cat.
A bumper to a humper?
Won't be a umm grumper.
Unless you're grumpy blue.
Then that's nothing new.
Now rest your fingers.
Nothing new lingers.
Sing a tune.
Be like Betsy and dance with a spoon.
Even at rest exercise be nice.
But no need to do it twice.
Relax in a chair.
Can still be bare.
Just pull the curtain.
Of that be certain.
Eat and be Mary.
Play with dogs that are hairy.
Hmm got that wrong?
Blame Donkey Kong.
And viola it's the next day.
Things came what may.
And guess what?
Nothing exploded at your hut.
Rest for the cat? We get plenty of that. May not seem so but when you are ahead plenty of rest can show. Things will always get done and then more things will need to be given a run. It never ends until you are dead. Then you rest in a permanent bed. So take a day, come what may, relax and let go of some gas. Trust my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.
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