Dave Barry's Blog, page 152

AND IN BASEBALL

Mets��� Pete Alonso hit first-pitch homer because he had to poop: ���Straight to the bathroom���

(Thanks to Michael Parry)

ALSO 'GOOD SHERRY'

I���m a 102-year-old ��� good sex is my secret to a long life

(Thanks to Allen at Division and Michael Parry)

CRIMINAL MASTERMIND OF THE WEEK SO FAR

Last week, police shared online that Rhinehart was a wanted man for having multiple warrants. They alerted the public to contact them if the 20-year-old was spotted. Rhinehart then replied to the social media post saying, ���Y���all almost had [me] the other day you gotta be quicker than that.���

(Thanks to nursecindy)

UPDATE

Man who terrified passengers by opening aircraft door midair ���wanted to get off quickly���

Well in that case, sir...

(Thanks to Steve K.)

GUYS IN ACTION

Pa. man in jail after nearly burning his house down trying to kill spiders

(Thanks to The Fourth George)

THEY'RE EVERYWHERE

Meet the ���gummy squirrel��� and thousands of other newly discovered deep-sea species ��� in pictures

(Thanks to Michael Parry)

CONNECTICUT TACKLES THE ISSUES

Connecticut lawmakers have voted to exonerate 12 people more than 370 years after they were convicted of witchcraft in colonial America.

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

FATHER���S DAY IS COMING

Always wanted a lighthouse? US is giving some away, selling others at auction

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

HE DROPPED IT WHILE TAKING A SELFIE

India official drains entire dam to retrieve phone

(Thanks to Robert Moats)

(He did not, in fact, drain the dam; he drained the reservoir.)

CRY US A RIVER

Male Arctic ground squirrels go through puberty every year. As if that wasn���t hard enough, now the females have a problem, too.

(Thanks to Robert Moats)