Lysa TerKeurst's Blog, page 9

April 9, 2019

I Don’t Want This to Be Part of My Story

“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.” Isaiah 40:29 (NIV)



Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “God, please don’t let this be part of my story”?



That was me when I first got my cancer diagnosis. Honestly, it just felt like too much on top of an already devastating season in my life.



When life is unfolding in hard ways, it can feel impossible to understand why God would allow hurt upon hurt. How could His mercy not fix all of this? How could He possibly use any of this for good?



We see more and more unnecessary heartbreak. But God sees the exact pieces and parts that must be added right now to protect us, provide for us and prepare us with more and more of His strength working through us.



I learned about these very necessary “pieces and parts” one day with a friend whose mother is a professional potter.



I was sharing with her about how, when we place the dust of our shattered places into God’s hands and He mixes it with His living water, the clay that’s formed can then be made into anything. She smiled so big. She’d seen clay being formed into many beautiful things when placed into her mother’s hands. And she shared something with me that made my jaw drop.



She told me that wise potters not only know how to form beautiful things from clay, but they also know how important it is to add some of the dust from previously broken pieces of pottery to the new clay. This type of dust is called “grog.”



When shattered just right, the grog dust added to the new clay will enable the potter to form the clay into a larger and stronger vessel than ever before. And it can go through fires much hotter as well. Plus, when glazed, these pieces end up having a much more beautiful, artistic look to them than they would have otherwise.



Isn’t that incredible?



And then I read Isaiah 45:9: “Woe to those who quarrel with their Maker, those who are nothing but potsherds among the potsherds on the ground. Does the clay say to the potter, ‘What are you making?’ Does your work say, ‘The potter has no hands’?”



I kept reading that verse from Isaiah and decided to do a little investigation into the term potsherd.



A potsherd is a broken piece of pottery. Interestingly enough, a potsherd was also mentioned in the story of Job when he was inflicted with an awful disease:



“So Satan went out from the presence of the LORD and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the crown of his head. Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes. His wife said to him, ‘Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!’ He replied, ‘You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?’ In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.” (Job 2:7–10)



A broken potsherd can lie on the ground and be nothing more than a constant reminder of brokenness. It can also be used to continue to scrape us and hurt us even more when kept in our hands. Or, when placed in our Master’s hands, the Master Potter can be entrusted to take that potsherd, shatter it just right, and then use it in the re-molding of us to make us stronger and even more beautiful.



When I understood this, I saw that in all my circumstances God was keeping me moldable while adding even more strength and beauty in the process. Much like He promises in our key verse, “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak” (Isaiah 40:29)



I didn’t want to have cancer.



There’s no part of my human brain that thinks cancer is fair for any precious person who receives this diagnosis. God didn’t cause this potsherd reality in my life. It’s the result of living in this sin-soaked world.



But I had to decide that I didn’t want that broken reality to just be a potsherd wasted on the ground or something I kept in my hand that hurt me more. I had to take it and entrust it to the Lord.



What do you need to entrust to Him today?



God is making something beautiful out of our lives, sweet friends. I truly believe it. We can keep questioning what He sees as the necessary ingredients to strengthen us or we can choose to believe that He can do amazing things with the dust and the potsherds of our lives. I know it’s not easy. But let’s surrender every broken piece into the Father’s hands.



Lord, I’m choosing to trust You. Take all of these broken places in my life and shatter them just right, so I can be made stronger, more beautiful, and able to withstand fires as never before. I believe that You see things I cannot see. And You have eventual good in mind. In Jesus’ name, Amen.





If these words resonated with you and your life looks so very different than you hoped or expected, I’d love to tell you about my newest book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way. It will help you find unexpected strength as you learn to wrestle well between your faith and feelings. Click HERE to get your copy.

Related posts:


You don’t have to fight through your hurt alone.
Shattered Beyond Repair
An early sneak peek of my next book…


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Published on April 09, 2019 07:34

March 22, 2019

How Do I Get Through This?

When hurtful circumstances happen in our lives we often wonder, “How will I ever get over this?”


I deeply understand that feeling. Since the release of my latest book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way, I’ve received hundreds of emails, direct messages on social media, and inquiries from people asking me how I got through one of the hardest seasons of my life.


Over the next few weeks on the Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast, we’re taking a break from our regularly scheduled programming to introduce a 6-week series called Therapy & Theology: How Do I Get Through This? Our goal is to meet you in the middle of your hurt and give you biblical answers on how to move through it.


In this series, you’ll hear me dive deep into conversation with my personal, licensed professional Christian counselor Jim Cress, as well as Proverbs 31 Ministries director of theology Joel Muddamalle.


By listening, you’ll learn how to…



Overcome the feeling that you’ll never get over the hurt you’re facing by recognizing small steps you can take today.
Replace the negative stigma of “therapy” by gaining a healthy, biblical view of counseling for your situation.
Discover the two distinct and necessary parts of forgiveness and how to live them out.
Find hope in the midst of devastating circumstances by seeking restoration for yourself through prayer and proven exercises to help you process your pain.

Listen to the first episode in the series: Why therapy and theology? by clicking HERE.


We pray these episodes over the next six weeks will bring hope and healing into your life.



Related posts:


Giving the Gift of Our Tears
Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer?
Perfection is My Enemy


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Published on March 22, 2019 14:56

March 8, 2019

What I Really Need Most

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Proverbs 13:12 (ESV)



Have you ever struggled because you know God can do anything but you can’t understand why He doesn’t seem to be intervening for your situation right now?



You’re trying to hang on to hope, but the more time that passes without any apparent change the harder it is.



In Proverbs 13:12 we’re told, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Deferred in this verse refers to a hopeless situation that feels long and drawn out. It’s the seemingly unending and disappointing kind of season that can leave us tempted to look at our lives and question, “Why is God withholding this from me? Since He’s not intervening I’ll just try to fix it myself in my way.”



This dangerous assumption is reminiscent of when Eve ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Adam and Eve were free to eat of any other tree in the garden. But Eve listened to the enemy. She got alone with her own thoughts and assumptions. And it led her to doubt her Father. Instead of heeding His instruction (Proverbs 13:1), she took control to get what she wanted. What she thought was best. (Genesis 3)



And as soon as she and Adam ate the forbidden fruit…

Perfection ended.


Curses began.


Consequences were unleashed.


And they were banished from the garden.




If only Eve would have noticed the other tree in the garden with her. The tree of life. The tree of God’s best way and perfect provision. It was there for her. She had a choice.



And so do we.



The tree of the knowledge of good and evil may not be in our physical sight today, but Satan is certainly making use of that same sense of disappointment, of our hope deferred. He wants us to be so consumed with our unmet expectations that our hearts just get more and more self-reliant and sick of waiting on God.



But God wants us to look to the tree of life.



Charles Spurgeon once preached, “My dear friends, you will never see the tree of life aright unless you first look at the cross . . . Thus then, Jesus Christ hanging on the cross is the tree of life in its wintertime.”



In the darkest hour this world has ever known, Jesus died on a cross, on a tree, as Galatians 3:13 puts it in the New Living Translation. But just as we know that trees in the wintertime only appear to be dead, so there was a redemptive transformation at work as Jesus hung on the cross.



Your life may be dark and confusing today. But make no mistake, there is a powerful work happening. And Jesus wants us to hear Him saying, “Eve turned to the wrong tree and received death. I hung on a tree to bring you back to life. I am the fulfillment of your every longing. I am your Tree of Life. Look to Me.”



Let’s make a different choice than Eve did. Turn from the deep desire to know all of the reasons and to control all of the outcomes. That knowledge would be a burden and attempting to control it all will do nothing but entangle you with anxiety and fear.



That’s why God didn’t want Adam and Eve to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. The knowledge it would give them was a burden God never wanted them to carry. And maybe that’s why we don’t have all the answers to our “why” questions. God isn’t trying to be distant or mysterious or hard to understand. He’s being merciful.



We don’t have to know the plan to trust there is a plan. We don’t have to feel good to trust there is good coming. We don’t have to see evidence of changes to trust that it won’t always be this hard.




We just have to close our physical eyes and turn our thoughts to Jesus. Fix our thoughts on Him. Say His name over and over and over. And know that we can trust our Father’s heart and His plans.



Father God, You keep showing me that I don’t need answers. I need Jesus. Help me stop the madness of my own assumptions of how things must turn out. My soul was made for assurance. And that is exactly what You have given me. The divine assurance of Your Son. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.




Do you long to be a woman who trusts God no matter what? Remind your heart that even if He doesn’t do what you’re asking, you can trust Him still with our “Even If” bracelet.



You can purchase this beautiful stainless steel rose gold cuff along with other resources that will help you fix your eyes on the hope you have in Christ HERE today.



Related posts:


Surviving Our Seasons of Suffering
Three Things to Remember When Your Normal Gets Hijacked
There’s No Way


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Published on March 08, 2019 04:00

February 18, 2019

Wisdom Together

“Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.” James 3:13 (NIV)



For all of their lives, my children have known a secret. When circumstances fall apart, there is a safe place. Their mom’s arms. More than a hug, this place beats with the gentle rhythm of a heart that feels what they feel. So they bring what they can’t bear to experience alone into this place. And we reconnect.



So, when my daughter crawled into my arms at 3 a.m. several years ago, I knew. Trouble had found its way into her heart. A boy, whom she thought would handle her heart gently, didn’t. Her crush, crushed her.



She felt it all so deeply. And while I could see it was all for the best, I hurt for her with her split-open heart, because she’s mine — my girl who couldn’t sleep, so she slipped into my bed to be near the rhythmic heartbeat she’s known since she was conceived.



And in the quiet middle of the night, I held her. I brushed her long brown hair off her tear-streaked face. I kissed the wet salt on her cheeks. And I whispered, “I love you.”



And she knew I was safe. Her safe place to run and find when the world got wild and cruel and heartbreakingly mean.



The next morning, she showed me the source of her middle-of-the-night anguish: a text message from him. His words were from a heart entangled with immaturity and his own sources of hurt. He wasn’t a bad person. He was young. And sometimes young means incapable of handling situations the right way.



I understand that. Age has given me that gift. But my young girl did not understand. She took the words like daggers to the heart. And cried.



She handed me the phone.



“Help me reply.”



There we sat in the midst of poached eggs and toast crumbs, talking together, thinking together, replying together.



Together is a really good word. Together is what we need when we hit tough patches in life.



No matter what hard place we find ourselves in, feeling alone can make us vulnerable to bad decisions. Hard places can so easily make us want to default to our feelings rather than to wisdom as our guide. That’s not the best time to make a decision. Especially not alone.



I suspect if you’re in a tough place, it probably feels more significant than a teenage heartbreak. I understand. I’ve been there. And I’ll probably be there again. And when we’re there, we have to be honest that we’re not in the place to make big decisions right then. Maybe we’re not even in the place to make decisions on simple requests from others.



This doesn’t make you bad or incapable. It makes you smart. Smart enough to know to pause and take extra time when life takes on extenuating circumstances that are hard.



In this pause from decisions, go to your safe place. When the world beats you down, open up your Bible. Let His sentences finish yours. Let truth walk before you like a guide on a dark path.



And also go to someone in your sphere of influence whom you know is wise. How do we know whom to go to? The Bible makes it clear: “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom” (James 3:13).



Yes, let these wise people help you. Stand on top of their wisdom when you feel shaky with your own. When we can rise up on the wisdom of others and get a new view of our situations, our next steps seem a little clearer.



Father, thank You for the help You surround me with — not only in Your Word, but also with the people You place in my life. Give me the wisdom to reach out for help when I need it. And make me aware of those around me who are hurting and could use Your hope. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.



Related posts:


Giving the Gift of Our Tears
Tearing Out the Old
If Only I Had…


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Published on February 18, 2019 07:00

February 4, 2019

A God Who Still Does Miracles




On an unusually sunny Tuesday in December, we dressed up a bit and whispered healing words, heartfelt promises, and holy vows. A million prayers. A miracle answer. A marriage restored.



Art and I renewed our wedding vows in our backyard surrounded by those who’ve walked closest with us these last few years. It was so personal and meaningful to seal our commitment in the very place we can once again do daily life together.



It hasn’t been easy or simple, and I still cry over what was. I still find myself wishing the hurt wasn’t part of our story.



I also wish that hurt wasn’t part of anyone’s relationship story. I know for some of you that you prayed, and hoped, and worked, and tried everything you could but the reconciliation never came. If I could sit with you right now, I would weep with you and simply say, “I’m so sorry. I don’t understand either.”



I wouldn’t offer you plastic sounding answers. God doesn’t want to be explained away, He wants to be invited in. So, we would just invite His presence and ask Him to help. Redemption is possible even when reconciliation is not.



Throughout this long process of healing, God has whispered deep into my soul, “I haven’t ‘cursed’ you with this. I’ve ‘entrusted’ you with this.”



May we all be found fiercely faithful no matter how our stories go.



And may we never doubt we serve a God who still does miracles. Sometimes they look like we hoped but other times it comes in the most unexpected unfolding.



Trust that only God knows the full story. He is working. He is hearing and shifting and intervening and convicting and stirring and doing what only He can do.



God does some of His best work in the unseen.





Related posts:


You don’t have to fight through your hurt alone.
When things don’t turn out the way you thought they would
An early sneak peek of my next book…


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Published on February 04, 2019 03:30

January 25, 2019

Surviving Our Seasons of Suffering

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11 (ESV)



Have you ever walked through difficult circumstances that felt unending? The kind that require you to be longsuffering?



Longsuffering isn’t a word I want to be part of my story. It means having or showing patience despite troubles. And I don’t particularly want troubles to begin with … let alone for any extended period of time.



Thankfully, today’s passage of Scripture offers us encouragement for when we’re not sure we can endure our season of suffering for one more second.



In Jeremiah 29, the children of Israel get news from the prophet Jeremiah that they are going to be held in captivity by Babylon for 70 years. Think about how long 70 years is. If we had to go to prison today for 70 years, for most of us, that would mean we’d probably die in captivity. Seventy years feels impossibly long, incredibly unfair and horribly hard. It would seem like a lifetime hardship without a lifeline of hope.



But here’s what God told the people of Israel: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place” (Jeremiah 29:10).



This is the scene and the setting where we then get these familiar and glorious promises I love to cling to:



“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you …” (Jeremiah 29:11‒14).



God is assuring His people that His thoughts and intentions toward them are fixed and established. His plans are for their “welfare” (šālôm), not for hurt. His sure and steady promise is one of restoration.



But He also reminds them of what they must do as they await the fulfillment of His promise. They need to call on Him. They need to intentionally and wholeheartedly seek Him.



When we seek God, we see God. We don’t see His physical form, but we see Him at work and can start to see more of what He sees. Trust grows. If our hearts are willing to trust Him, He will entrust to us more of His perspective.



If we want to see Him in our circumstances and see His perspective, we must seek Him, His ways and His Word. That’s where we find His good plans and promises for hope and a future.



If we find ourselves in an incredibly disappointing place — a place we don’t want to be — it’s easy to start feeling that some of God’s good plans don’t apply to us. We can even lapse into the mentality that we somehow slipped through the cracks of God’s good plans.



But the truth is, God is closer than we often realize. He sees things we don’t see, and He knows things we don’t know. He has a perspective from where He is that allows Him to see all things — the past, the present and the future — from the day we are conceived to the day we breathe our last breath, and even beyond that into eternity. He declares He is our rescuer. He is the One who will sustain us. And He is more than able to bring His plans to pass. (Isaiah 46:3-11)



All of these things were true for the Israelites. And they’re true for us.



For the Israelites, the news that they would be in captivity for 70 years was absolute reality. But the truth that God had a good plan and a purpose not to harm them but to give them a future and a hope — that promise was very much in process all the while they were in captivity.



This is how we, too, can trust God in the midst of our longsuffering journeys: by having a higher perspective in our present realities.



Let’s cry out to Him in the midst of our suffering. Let’s earnestly seek Him and ask Him to help us look at our circumstances through the lens of His love instead of a lens of disillusionment and disappointment. We are not forgotten or forsaken. And our longsuffering won’t seem nearly as long or nearly as painful when we know God’s perspective is to use every single second of our suffering for good.



Father God, thank You for reminding me I can trust You in the waiting. I know I can entrust every season of my life into Your hands. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.



Have you been looking at life through the lens of disappointment or the lens of God’s love? How can you let the truth of God’s goodness shift your perspective this week?


If this post resonated with you, my new book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way would be a great resource to help you process your disappointments with a friend who understands. Click HERE to get your copy.



Related posts:


Three Things to Remember When Your Normal Gets Hijacked
The Process Before the Promise
Shattered Beyond Repair


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Published on January 25, 2019 03:15

January 9, 2019

You don’t have to fight through your hurt alone.

There was someone I kept thinking about when writing my book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way.



This precious person kept my fingers, sometimes flying, sometimes trembling, still clicking the keys until they became pages of words.



She was worth wrestling through my tangled thoughts until they finally flowed like a healing balm for the hurting heart. She was on the top of my mind during all those whispered prayers, “show me how to understand this and teach this, God.” And who was this beautiful soul?



You.



You don’t have to fight through your disappointments, tears, and unanswered questions alone.

That’s exactly why I want to invite you to be a part of the FREE study Proverbs 31 Online Bible Studies is doing of my new book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way starting on January 21st.



Register today and you’ll get:



• A free download of Mack Brock’s new single, “Into Dust,” inspired by the book.

• Automatically entered into a drawing to win a copy of the It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way audiobook.

• Exclusive access to the weekly teaching videos that accompany the It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way curriculum during the Online Bible Study.



You’ll be a part of an incredible community of women and learn biblical truths to get you through life’s hardest circumstances.



Find unexpected strength when you sign up to join us here.


 



Related posts:


Watch the Release Day Live Event Replay!
Why would a good God allow hurt?
Shattered Beyond Repair


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Published on January 09, 2019 03:00

December 27, 2018

Giving the Gift of Our Tears

“They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.” Revelation 12:11a (NIV)



The worst kind of lonely for me is being surrounded by people and yet still feeling utterly alone.



I can feel it at a restaurant full of noise and activity and people talking loudly over one another. I can feel it in a mall bustling with crowds and overhead announcements and music meant to move everyone along. I can feel it even in a house full of voices I know with all the typical background noises of this place I call home.



The world is spinning, people are connecting, and music is playing … and there I am in the middle of it all, smiling on the outside but crying on the inside.



It’s like one of those Broadway show moments when all the other actors are frozen in a moment of activity, but the spotlight gets thrown on the unsuspected girl stage left. She sings a sorrowful solo about all that’s going on inside her world. And the brokenhearted ballad strikes a chord inside the part of us that feels so very alone as well. We swallow hard, because it could so very easily be us singing that same song in the midst of the crowds of our life as well.



Never have I understood this feeling more than when my marriage hit the roughest of places, and I didn’t know who to turn to for help.



Part of the problem was I didn’t know exactly what was going on. But the other part of my silence was because I wasn’t sure what to say or who was safe to say it to. So I just walked through my days pretending to connect with others while feeling so very isolated.



Since I’ve broken my silence about this, I’ve been astounded by the number of women who feel the same way. They’ve slipped me notes in person or through social media that admit how very alone they feel because of a hurt they haven’t been able to talk about or process.



This is a huge tactic of the enemy. He knows if he can isolate us, he can influence us. He can make us so consumed with the hurt and convinced it will never get better that we miss one of God’s greatest gifts. God created us to do life in a community of believers where we can go stand on someone else’s faith when our own gets shaky. People who can help us see the hope in the midst of our hurts. Friends who pray more words over us than they speak to us. Fellow journeymen who can share their testimony of heartbreak turned healing, so we don’t get swallowed up by the pain of our similar circumstances.



We need each other.



God designed us to help each other.



Look at the very first two humans recorded in the Bible, Adam and Eve. Genesis 2:18 tells us, “The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’” (NIV).



Throughout the Bible, we see our need for each other clearly communicated.



“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, NIV).



“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing” (1 Thessalonians 5:11, NIV).



“They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony” (Revelation 12:11a).



Oh, how I love that last verse. God’s message of hell-defeating hope is often most powerfully preached from the lips of those whose pain has been turned into the purpose of helping others.



Who do you need to share your tears with? Who needs to know they aren’t alone?



I know how hard it is to open up about our deepest disappointments. I deeply understand how terrifying vulnerability can be. But I also know there’s someone else in the world who would drown in their own tears if not for seeing yours. And when you make one other human simply see they aren’t alone, you make the world a better place.



Father God, I’m so grateful You don’t waste any of my tears. I want to take these lessons I’m learning in the midst of my own brokenness and use them to help someone else feel less alone, less broken, less hopeless. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.



One of our deepest desires here at Proverbs 31 Ministries is to reach those who feel painfully alone in their circumstances, and provide a safe place for them to get connected and get their hopelessness redirected with solid teaching and honest testimonies. If you have ever needed the exact message you received from Proverbs 31 Ministries through one of the many ways we reach out daily, will you consider partnering with us financially, so we can continue reaching those who are desperate for connection and hope? You can give here today.



Related posts:


Perfection is My Enemy
When Impressing Others Depresses Us
How to Hold On to Hope in Your Most Devastating Seasons


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Published on December 27, 2018 08:00

December 10, 2018

Where Is My Happily Ever After?

“The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.” Psalm 145:18 (NIV)


It’s hard when a situation doesn’t look anything like we thought it would.



Especially if you’re like me, and you like a plan. I like all involved to follow along with the plan. And I certainly don’t want any unexpected deviations from or disappointments with the plan at all, ever.



In reality, though, life is highly unpredictable. I keep bumping up against this as I walk through a long season of life not looking like I thought it would.



I suspect many of you are also facing circumstances that have left you feeling caught off-guard and unsure about what tomorrow holds.



Maybe you’re in a job where you feel unsettled, and you think that God is leading you somewhere else, but He hasn’t yet revealed what’s next. So, for now, you walk into an office every day giving it your all, but your heart feels disconnected and your real calling unfulfilled.



Or maybe you’ve been watching everyone else in your life find love, walk down the aisle, and start the life you’ve dreamed of. Then a few months ago you met someone who was everything you’ve been hoping for. You told your friends this might be the one. And then this week you felt that person pulling back. It’s hard to understand. You feel panicked. But the more you press in, the more distance you feel between the two of you.



There are thousands of scenarios that evoke these feelings of uncertainty, fear and exhaustion from life not being like you thought it would be.



Whatever your situation is, you probably feel like you can’t change it, but you still have to live through the realities of what’s happening right now. Sometimes you just have to walk in your “I don’t know.”



The Lord makes it clear in His Word that things will not always go as we wish they would in this life:



“In this world you will have trouble” (John 16:33b, NIV).



“Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:34b, NIV).



All this trouble is exhausting. Walking in the “I don’t know” is scary. And sometimes we can be desperate to make things easier than they really are.



We keep thinking, if we can just get through this circumstance, then life will settle down and finally the words happily ever after will scroll across the glorious scene of us skipping happily into the sunset.



But what if life settling down and all your disappointments going away would be the worst thing that could happen to you?



What if your “I don’t know” is helping you, not hurting you?



Remember those verses we just read about troubles? Here they are again in the context of the full passages:



“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33, NIV).



“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:33-34, NIV).



The crucial detail for us to have peace in the middle of everything we face is to stay close to the Lord.

We think we want comfort in the I-don’t-know times of life. But comfort isn’t a solution to seek; rather, it’s a by-product we’ll reap when we stay close to the Lord.



I wish I could promise you that everything’s going to turn out like you’re hoping it will. I can’t, of course. But what I can promise you is this: The assurance of Psalm 145:18 is true, “The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.”



Let’s cry out to God, declaring that this hard time will be a holy time, a close-to-God time. And let’s choose to believe that there is good happening, even in these places. Because wherever God is, good is being worked.



Father God, I’m forever grateful for Your presence and all that You offer me as I rest in You. More than I need You to fix anything in my life, I need You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.



Do you ever struggle with knowing how to encourage a friend walking through difficult circumstances? Discover how to help her navigate hard realities with real help from God’s truth with my newest book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way. You can order your copy here today.



Related posts:


Three Things to Remember When Your Normal Gets Hijacked
The Process Before the Promise
The Best Battle Plan


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Published on December 10, 2018 13:04

November 26, 2018

Three Things to Remember When Your Normal Gets Hijacked

“‘Abba, Father,’ he said, ‘everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.’” Mark 14:36 (NIV)


The only way I could fall asleep was to lie to myself. “If you can just fall asleep, when you wake up you’ll realize this is a nightmare that will soon end.”


But that wasn’t reality. The next morning, I woke up and the devastation was there in an even more heartbreaking way. I reached across the covers and all my fears were confirmed.


My husband was gone.


Death hadn’t taken him. No, the hijacking of our normal was a slow erosion that led to an eventual landslide wiping out everything secure about our relationship.


That awful morning happened nearly three years ago. And I promised myself if I actually survived looking my greatest fears in the face, I would eventually be a voice of help and hope for others thrust into a darkness they never imagined.


So, here I am. I survived. We survived. And we’re determined to turn our battle scars into a battle cry to help others.


Whether you’re reeling from a life altering circumstance or you’re wrestling through something not turning out the way you thought it would, I know what it’s like to say, “It’s not supposed to be this way.” And I feel compelled to tell you three truths you must hear:


1. You are not alone in wanting things to be different and asking God to change your situation.


Did you know even Jesus asked God to change His circumstances and fix what God surely could have fixed in an instant? Listen to these words of Jesus right before he was arrested and eventually crucified:


Mark 14:36. “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me….”


I have found such comfort in remembering the humanity of Jesus. Yes, His divinity made him perfect and sinless, but His humanity felt the brutal weight of human hurt. He understands loneliness, betrayal, and being devastated by people He should have been able to trust. He knows what it’s like to be lied to, misunderstood, falsely accused, and rejected. And because I know He’s felt what I feel, I know I can trust Him to lead me through my heartbreak.


2. There is a place to attach our hope but it’s not to our desire for changed circumstances.


Verse 36 doesn’t end with Jesus’ request for things to be different. It ends with the strongest statement of trusting God that I can find in the whole Bible: “… Yet not what I will, but what you will.”


In other words, Jesus had a strong desire for change. But He had an even stronger desire to trust God with it all. This is hard for a girl like me who loves to suggest to God all the ways He could surely fix my circumstances. But God loves me too much to do things my way. His plan is always better even if I can’t understand or see it clearly as it’s unfolding.


3. Though my story took the most unexpected twists and turns through the darkest valleys I’ve ever known, God’s plan was good.


Only God could take a string of really bad circumstances and add them together to make a good I never knew was possible. None of my suggestions to fix things ever worked. The good only came in God’s timing and in unexpected ways.


And though our normal will never look like it used to, it’s been replaced by something better. A deeper awareness of who God is and an unexpected strength that comes with truly trusting Him.


Don’t give up dear friend. Don’t stop praying. Don’t stop hoping and believing. But also, don’t believe that your way of getting to the other side of your circumstance is the only way. God has a perfect plan for a path to a renewed joy and a redeemed future that’s probably one you can’t even fathom. Trust Him.


The hijacking is over. I no longer lie to myself. Now the only way I can fall asleep at night is to speak truth. God is here. God is near. God can absolutely be trusted with it all.


Father God, these devastating circumstances have left me so weary. But the truth of Your love leaves me hopeful. I’m trusting in Your plans for me and I’m lifting up these words to You – not my will, but Yours. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.


_____________________________________________________________


In my newest book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way, my heart is cracked wide open so that the words, life lessons, hope, and courage I’ve found in the midst of disappointment can help you find unexpected strength for your journey. Order your copy here today.



Related posts:


The Process Before the Promise
Shattered Beyond Repair
When things don’t turn out the way you thought they would


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Published on November 26, 2018 12:44