Lysa TerKeurst's Blog, page 10

Watch the Release Day Live Event Replay!

Wow… what an amazing night we had together celebrating the release of It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way! Thank you for all of the love, support, and prayers as we launched this book out into the world.



If you missed the live event, here is the replay you can watch now!

If the video player isn’t visible in your email, click here to watch.

Here are links to some of the things we talked about:



Purchase your copy of It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way

Listen to worship music by Mack Brock

Learn more about my counselor Jim Cress and find a Christian counselor in your area

Onsite Workshops



After you watch the replay, I’d love to hear from you in the comments below… what resonated most deeply with your heart? And how can my team pray for you today with a hard thing you might be facing?

Related posts:

Why would a good God allow hurt?
When things don’t turn out the way you thought they would
The Best Battle Plan

Why would a good God allow hurt?

Have you ever faced a hard life situation that left you thinking, “Why this? Why now? Why me?”

Sometimes our expectations look like one thing, but then our actual experience is quite another thing. The distance between those two becomes the fertile soil of disappointment where fear, disillusionments, and doubts about the goodness of God grow wild and fierce.

Disappointment is a feeling we all have, but few of us know how to process it, what to do about it, and most importantly how to find God’s goodness and wisdom in the midst of it.

It comes in varying degrees of pain. Sometimes we struggle over the small disappointments like a crazy haircut or a missed opportunity. Other times the disappointments are much more disillusioning and sometimes even devastating.

A friend that suddenly goes silent. A child that starts making decisions so opposite from the way you raised them. A job loss without any new possibilities on the horizon. A betrayal from someone who you thought was completely trustworthy. Financial debt that feels inescapable. A terrifying medical diagnosis. The sudden death of someone you love so much you don’t know how you’ll go on without them.

The list of disappointments big and small are endless. We’ve all experienced our fair share of things not turning out how we thought they would.



So what do we do about it?



How do we live the joyful and abundant Christian life when we are so afraid of the next unexpected hardship and heartbreak? And why would our loving God allow all of this hurt?



I’ve personally wrestled through these questions on a very deep level and asked the Lord to give me His perspective through one of the hardest seasons of my life. And I want to share those perspectives with you.



That’s why I wrote my new book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered.



It releases TODAY and if you purchase your copy today from Proverbs 31 Ministries, you’ll receive a download of one of my personal paintings!



I’d also love to have you join us tonight at 6:30pm EST for the live stream release day event! I’ll be giving a message and sitting down with my personal counselor to share practical ways to heal from our disappointments. Make sure to head over to my Facebook page to tune in.



If you are unable to watch the release day celebration at the scheduled time, don’t worry! You’ll be able to watch the replay tomorrow, right here on the blog.

Related posts:

Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer?
When things don’t turn out the way you thought they would
An early sneak peek of my next book…

The Process Before the Promise

“I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry.”  Psalm 40:1 ESV



Are there any deep disappointments in your life that seem to be lingering on and on? Do you feel like you’ve been praying the same prayers over and over with little to no change?



I understand how hard that is. As I’ve mentioned recently here on the blog, I’ve walked through some of the most heartbreaking seasons in my family, marriage, and health in the last few years.



And although the circumstances of your life may be different, you probably have middle-of-the-night moments of wrestling through your own tears.



You, too, have memories that still hurt. Realities that make you swallow back tears. Sufferings that seem forever long. And you’re disappointed that today you aren’t living the promises of God you’ve begged to come to pass.



In your most private moments you want to scream words you don’t use around your Bible friends at the unfairness of it all. But then there are more hopeful moments… where you want to turn up the praise music, lift up honest prayers, and declare that God is good even when the situation doesn’t seem good.



That’s what it is like to be so very human—hurting but still hoping.



And that is where we find David in Psalm 40. In the first ten verses David praises God for delivering him, but then in verses 11-17 he is having to cry out for God to deliver him again. David is hurting but still hoping.



Hoping doesn’t mean we ignore reality. No, hoping means we acknowledge reality in the very same breath that we acknowledge God’s sovereignty.



Our hope can’t be tied to whether or not a circumstance or another person changes. Our hope must be tied to the unchanging promise of God. We hope for the good we know God will ultimately bring from our situation, whether the good turns out to match our desires or not. And sometimes that takes a while. The process will most likely require us to be persevering. Patient. Maybe even longsuffering.



Honestly, I know that can feel a little overwhelming.



I want the promised blessing of Psalm 40:4: “Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust.” I forget that this kind of trusting in God is often forged in the crucible of longsuffering. God isn’t picking on me. God is picking me to personally live out one of His promises.



It’s a high honor. But it doesn’t always feel that way. I’ve got to walk through the low places of the process before I’m perfectly equipped to live the promise.



We read about some of the low places of the process in verses 1–3 of Psalm 40:



“I waited patiently for the Lord;

   he inclined to me and heard my cry.

He drew me up from the pit of destruction,

   out of the miry bog,

and set my feet upon a rock,

   making my steps secure.

He put a new song in my mouth,

   a song of praise to our God.

Many will see and fear,

   and put their trust in the Lord.”



The idea of waiting patiently in verse 1 is incredibly important in this Psalm. The Hebrew word indicates that the waiting is ongoing and holds a sense of eager expectancy and hope.



So while I want the solid rock on which to stand, first I have to wait patiently for the Lord to lift me out of the slime and mud and set my feet. That word set in the original Hebrew is qum, which means to arise or take a stand. God has to take me through the process of getting unstuck from what’s been holding me captive before I can take a stand.



I also want that new song promised here. Did you notice, though, what comes before the psalm’s promise of a new song? It’s the many cries to the Lord for help. The most powerful praise songs are often guttural cries of pain that got turned into beautiful melodies.



I know this is hard. But let me be the one to lean in and whisper to you, “God is working things out. He’s not far away. He is right here with us. We need to cling to this hope. Believe this hope. Live out this hope. Right here and right now. Even if our prayers aren’t answered in the way and the timing that we want. Even when this process feels messy. We will trust that God is good.”



Keep crying out to Him, friend. Keep hoping in Him. And know that God will take every cry you’ve uttered and arrange those sounds into a glorious song.



Lord God, we know You often work in ways we don’t understand. Help us feel close to you in the middle of the process You’re taking us through. Help us trust You are at work even when You seem silent and far off. Help us believe You are good in every way—every day. Thank You for Your loving and watchful care of us, Your children. We’re thankful today and always. In Jesus’ precious Name we pray, Amen.

_____________________________________________________________

If your life or current circumstance isn’t turning out the way you thought it would, I understand. That’s why I wrote my new book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way. You can pre-order your copy here today and receive the first three chapters immediately, ahead of its upcoming release next week on November 13th!



It’s also time for a giveaway! I’d love to give away three advance reader copies to three of you! Leave a comment below and tell me what you’re choosing to tie your hope to in this season.



We’ll draw three winners on Friday at 12:00pm EST!

Related posts:

Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer?
Shattered Beyond Repair
If Only I Had…

Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer?

When God doesn’t seem to be answering our prayers, it can be hard.



Sometimes, downright awful. Heartbreaking. Soul-shaking. One minute I’m determined to trust God. In the next, I feel myself slipping.



The “why” questions tumble in so hard. My heart hurts. My eyes leak. Can you relate?



The hard realities we’re facing can really make us believe that God isn’t hearing our prayers. And when our cries seem to go unanswered, His timing can feel questionable, His lack of intervention hurtful and His promises doubtful.



But the truth is … God loves us too much to answer our prayers at any other time than the right time.



At one time or another, we all feel the ache of these “why” questions when our situations don’t seem to be getting the attention they need from God. That’s why I’ve written a 5-day devotional called, Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer?



With this free devotional, you’ll be equipped to:



– Stop feeling suspicious about God’s goodness by discovering how to better understand and process the times when He seems silent.



– Find the hope your heart needs in the midst of deep disappointment by recognizing there is purpose in the process God is working out in your life.



– Learn how to trust that the Lord will answer your prayer in the right way, at the right time, with new perspectives you can embrace today.



Click here to download Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer? and receive the help and hope you’re needing right now in this season.

Related posts:

Shattered Beyond Repair
When things don’t turn out the way you thought they would
Rest and Reassurance

Shattered Beyond Repair

“Yet You, LORD, are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.” Isaiah 64:8 (NIV)

Are there any broken places in your heart and life right now?



I know how hard that can be.



And there’s this wonderful Christian story I could tell you. It’s the one that talks about how we can pick up the broken pieces, glue them back together and then let God’s light shine through our cracks. That’s a beautiful story.



But what about those times when things aren’t just broken but shattered beyond repair? Shattered to the point of dust. At least when things are broken there’s some hope you can glue the pieces back together.



But what if there aren’t even pieces to pick up in front of you?



You can’t glue dust.



It’s hard to hold dust. What was once something so very precious is now reduced to nothing but weightless powder even the slightest wind could carry away. We feel desperately hopeless. Dust begs us to believe the promises of God no longer apply to us. That the reach of God falls just short of where we are. And that the hope of God has been snuffed out by the consuming darkness all around us.



Over the past few years I have been walking through my own season of dust. And if we could sit down over coffee, I imagine you would have some kind of shattered dust story that you could share with me too. We are alike in that way. We’re united with our tears, even if our circumstances are different.



We’re also united in our desire for God to fix it all. Edit this story so it has a different ending. Repair this heartbreaking reality.



But what if fixing, editing, and repairing isn’t at all what God has in mind for us in this shattering?



What if, this time, God desires to make something completely brand-new? Right now. On this side of eternity. No matter how impossible our circumstances may seem.



You see, dust is the exact ingredient God loves to use.



We think the shattering in our lives could not possibly be for any good. But what if shattering is the only way to get dust back to its basic form so that something new can be made? We can see dust as a result of an unfair breaking. Or we can see dust as a crucial ingredient.



Think about a plain piece of ice. If the ice stays in a cube, it will always be just a square of ice. But if the ice melts it can be poured into a beautiful form to reshape it when frozen again. Dust is much the same; it’s the basic ingredient with such great potential for new life.



Of all the things God could have used to make man, He chose to use dust. “Then the LORD God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being” (Genesis 2:7, NIV).



Jesus used the dust of the ground to restore a man’s sight. Jesus said, “‘While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.’ After saying this, he spit on the ground, made some mud with the saliva, and put it on the man’s eyes” (John 9:5–6, NIV). And after the man washed in the pool of Siloam, he went home seeing.



And, when mixed with water, dust becomes clay. Clay, when placed in the potter’s hands, can be formed into anything the potter dreams up!



“Yet You, LORD, are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.” (Isaiah 64:8, NIV)



“‘Can I not do with you, Israel, as this potter does?’ declares the LORD. ‘Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand, Israel.’” (Jeremiah 18:6, NIV)



Oh, how I love and need the hope God has tucked into these verses.



Dust doesn’t have to signify the end. Dust is often what must be present for the new to begin.



I don’t know what hard realities have left you feeling shattered, friend. But I do know this: We can trust our God. We can trust Him with our dust.



Our greatest disappointments and disillusionments, those things that shake us and break us and make us wonder about everything, they don’t have to mean that all hope is lost. We can place our lives fully in the hands of the Potter. We can dare to believe He is making something glorious out of dust, out of us.




Father, I confess that I don’t like this—I don’t like dust. But I’m reminding my soul that dust is one of Your favorite ingredients to use when making something new. And I’m choosing to believe You are working right now to do this very thing in my life. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

People say it all of the time: “God won’t give you more than you can handle.” But what about when He actually does?



Discover the secret of being steadfast and not panicking when God gives you more than you feel like you can possibly bear with my new book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way. Pre-order your copy here today and get the first three chapters immediately!



It’s also time for a giveaway! I’d love to give away three advance reader copies to three of you! Leave a comment below and tell me which one of the Scriptures mentioned in the post resonated with you the most.



We’ll be in contact with the winners on Friday!

Related posts:

When things don’t turn out the way you thought they would
An early sneak peek of my next book…
You’re Invited…

When things don’t turn out the way you thought they would

Do you ever find yourself saying, “this isn’t turning out the way I thought it would”?



Maybe you have this feeling that circumstances should be better than they are.



Relationships should be better than they are.



Your marriage should be better than it is.



Finances should be better than they are.



Life should be better than it is.



And underneath it all, you’re disappointed.



I deeply and personally understand that ache. If you’ve followed along with my story, you know that the last few years I’ve been walking through heartbreak after heartbreak with my marriage, my family, and my health.



But God has been showing me such rich truths from His Word that have literally saved my life. And I want to share that hope with you to help you in your own disappointments. That’s why I wrote my new book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered.

In this book, we’ll learn to:

● Stop being pulled into the anxiety of disappointment by discovering how to better process unmet expectations and other painful situations.



● Train ourselves to recognize the three strategies of the enemy so we can stand strong and persevere through unsettling relationships and uncertain outcomes.



● Discover the secret of being steadfast and not panicking when God actually does give us more than we can handle.



● Shift our suspicion that God is cruel or unfair to the biblical assurance that God is protecting and preparing us.



● Know how to encourage a friend and help her navigate hard realities with real help from God’s truth.

It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way hasn’t released yet, but you can pre-order your copy today and get the first 3 chapters immediately. You’ll also gain access to a private Facebook group I’m hosting with my friends where we’ll process through deep disappointments together.

Pre-order your copy by clicking here.

I love you, friend. Let’s meet in the pages of the book and journey on together.

Related posts:

What Do We Do With Expectations?
An early sneak peek of my next book…
The Best Battle Plan

What Do We Do With Expectations?

Have you ever felt like a failure in your relationships?



Or maybe you’ve wondered why relationships have to be so hard and confusing at times?



This week, I’m excited to be a guest on the Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast as we talk about expectations in our relationships. I’m convinced one of the top reasons relationships feel like they’re failing is because of unmet expectations.



Expectations come in three potential categories:



1. realistic expectations

2. unrealistic expectations

3. uncommunicated expectations



It’s normal to be baffled by expectations, because they can be so confusing and wreak havoc on our relationships. We all know that unmet expectations breed frustrations. And we certainly don’t need more frustration in our lives. But what can we do about it right now?



Join in on the conversation by listening to the podcast on your phone or computer here. Or, you can take it on the road by downloading the show on your favorite podcast app.



The things we’ll be processing have radically changed some of my most difficult relationship challenges. My prayer is that you’ll gain a new perspective as you navigate expectations with your friends, co-workers, and family members!

Related posts:

Perfection is My Enemy
How Can I Grow Closer to God?
You’re Invited…

Because We’re All a Work in Progress

Over the last couple of years, I’ve watched my home undergo several renovation projects.



And with each floor that’s torn up, wall that’s removed, and plan that’s put in motion—I’m paying attention. As I’ve seen portions of our home demolished beyond recognition and put back together again—I’m learning that home renovations are so very similar to heart renovations.



1. You have to tear some things down before you can build back up in new and beautiful ways.



It’s impossible to see true transformation unless you remove the damaged and unhealthy portions first. Houses and people are alike in this way.



2. Working on the foundation isn’t the most appealing or attractive work but it is some of the most important.



Jesus spoke of this truth in Matthew 7:24-27:



“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”



Building our lives on anything but God’s Truth will result in a shaky foundation—a detriment to any building project before it even begins. Yes, we must put in the necessary, hard work of building our lives and our faith on the solid grounds of Scripture through consistency and daily seeking.



3. Not everyone is going to like what you’re doing.



Change invites both compliments and criticism. Just remember what comes out of someone else’s mouth is much more a reflection of their heart, not yours.



4. It’s good to stay humble enough to realize sometimes you need to get the professionals involved.



Some things you can do on your own and some things you can’t. Many small repairs can be handled without the help of a professional, but most large renovations—those deeps hurts and devastations—must be handled with care by those who are skilled in working with God to bring renewed health and restoration to both body and soul. My family and I have benefited greatly by bringing in the professionals in this season and we’re so grateful.



5. Those who don’t lose sight of the progress being made will find joy in the process.



And it’s always a process. Celebrate the wins, even the small ones. Stacks of small wins turn into big wins. And we can give God praise for each and every one.



“But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” – 1 Corinthians 15:57



I’m sending all my love to you on this progress-filled day. Heart renovations, like home renovations, take diligence, patience, and a whole lot of prayer.



You are a beautiful work in progress.

Related posts:

Tearing Out the Old
Lord, help me see beauty
God’s Unfailing Love

Perfection is My Enemy

“It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect.” – Psalm 18:32



Twenty-three years ago a beautiful soul captivated my heart from her very first breath.



From the moment my middle daughter Ashley was born, I’ve adored, loved, and tried to keep up with her. Her sense of adventure, pure passion for Jesus, crazy love for her family, and intense work ethic makes her a beautiful force of good in this world.



Ashley and her husband David live in California and are preparing to welcome their first child in just a few short weeks! My role as Gigi to my grandchildren is one of my greatest joys and I can’t wait to meet my new grandson and have him join our big, loud, and loving family.



And today we’re thrilled to have Ashley as a guest on the Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast! I want to invite you into the conversation as she talks about her struggle with perfectionism and how it has affected her life and relationships, “I was so exhausted and I finally decided—physically and emotionally—I just couldn’t do it anymore.”



I really love the wisdom Ashley shares as she encourages us, “The Lord is the only thing that can fill that ache … only God and His plan is perfect.”



If you need hope in the midst of feeling tired and frustrated with always trying to be perfect, you don’t want to miss this episode.



Listen in to the Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast through your Podcast app on your phone, or by clicking here to listen on our website.

Related posts:

There’s No Way
When Impressing Others Depresses Us
The Fruit We Bear

Checking the Landscape of Our Hearts

“On that day his feet shall stand on the Mount of Olives that lies before Jerusalem on the east, and the Mount of Olives shall be split in two from east to west by a very wide valley, so that one half of the Mount shall move northward, and the other half southward.” – Zechariah 14:4



I wish today’s blog could come with a boarding pass.



Instead of meeting here, we would travel together to one of my favorite places to study God’s Word — the Holy Land. There is something so powerful and humbling about standing in a place where you know Jesus Himself once stood.



As incredible as that would be, I’m thankful we don’t have to travel internationally in order to glean something personally from Scripture today. All we need to do is dig a bit deeper into the history of a pivotal location found in this chapter of Zechariah — the Mount of Olives.



The Mount of Olives is a ridge that runs about two and a half miles from north to south on the eastern side of Jerusalem. Three of the peaks that make up this mountain range are Mount Scopus (the north peak), Mount of Olives (the center peak) and Mount of Corruption (the south peak). It is separated from the city of Jerusalem by the Kidron Valley, also known as the Valley of Decision. And it serves as an important location for a variety of biblical events.



In the New Testament, we discover that Jesus’ feet were found standing on this mount often. He rested, taught and prayed in this place. It is where He was on the night of His betrayal (John 18:1), and it is on this very mount that His disciples watched Him ascend into heaven. (Acts 1:9-12)



In our key verse, Zechariah 14:4, we learn that it is the place where His feet will one day land again: “On that day his feet shall stand on the Mount of Olives that lies before Jerusalem on the east, and the Mount of Olives shall be split in two from east to west by a very wide valley, so that one half of the Mount shall move northward, and the other half southward.”



I don’t want us to miss what the prophet Zechariah says will happen when the Lord’s feet hit the Mount of Olives on that day. The land will be split in two. Divided. And before we think this is simply a geography lesson, God wants us to know there is so much more going on here.



The physical ramifications brought on by Israel’s divided hearts hold powerful spiritual implications for our hearts today.



On the day Jesus returns, He will destroy the Mount of Corruption. This is the part of the mountain range where King Solomon allowed his pagan wives to build altars to worship false gods. (1 Kings 11:7) This area defiled by Solomon as he clung to his wives instead of the Lord will fall. And water will come up from the temple and flow both directions, east and west (Zechariah 14:8), moving with such force that the Mount of Corruption will be rushed with the water into the Dead Sea.



Why? Because God will always tear down anything that is detestable to Him.



How this convicts my heart.



I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be in the camp of Solomon on that glorious day when Jesus returns. I don’t want to be like the children of Israel, found time and again clinging to things that do not honor Him.



I want to ask the Lord to convict me. To reveal the places where I’m holding fast to sin. To show me if there is anything in my life that dishonors Him. I know it’s not an easy or comfortable thing to do. But when we repent and press past the initial discomfort of conviction, we get to step into the glorious work of God’s restoration.



Ezekiel 47:8-9 tells us that when the Mount of Corruption is washed away into the Dead Sea, those waters will once again be teeming with life. How like Jesus! When we ask forgiveness for our sins, He washes us clean. He says that our sins will be cast into the sea to be remembered no more. He makes us new and offers eternal life to all who profess Him as Lord.



What an incredible gift it is to be His.



Let’s ask Him to help us check the landscape of our hearts. Let’s allow Him to reveal any divided affections. Any idols taking up space that belongs to Him.



The things in our life that don’t honor God will eventually be removed. We have a choice. Either we can release them, or He will remove them. May today be the day we choose release.



God, create in me a clean heart. Purify me, Lord. I know that anything in my life that dishonors You will not stand. And I don’t want to wait until the last day when those areas of compromise and sin fall and become my shame. I want to confess them now. I want to release each one into Your hands so they can be carried away into the Dead Sea. Thank You for being a God of both grace and truth. A God of conviction and restoration. I surrender anew to Your work in me today. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

If you enjoyed today’s post, I’d love to invite you to download our FREE First 5 app! Every day, we do in-depth Bible study together in the first moments of our morning. Find out more information and download it here.

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How Can I Grow Closer to God?