Sundi Jo Graham's Blog, page 33
March 6, 2014
Stay Away from the Wicked Part Three
Does a person living in a homosexual lifestyle know they are living in sin? Some do and some don’t.
I didn’t realize I was living in sin. Like I said before, the only verse I remembered from the Bible was John 3:16. I assumed I was a good person and would go to Heaven because of it. I hadn’t killed anyone. I helped others. I wore a cross necklace around my neck. I said my prayers at night. I was in.
I didn’t come to know Jesus because I was a homosexual. I came to know Him because I was a broken sinner in need of help.
There are those in the homosexual lifestyle who honestly don’t know better, even if they have read Leviticus 20:13. They don’t know the whole truth. They’re defending themselves against judgmental Christians by using Google search to find Bible verses to prove them right. We Christians are doing the same.
Then there are those who do know better. I know of an openly gay man who has no desire to change. He publicly blasphemes God every opportunity he gets. I see no desire in him to know any else but the life he is involved in. It makes my heart sad for him. And it’s not just his choice to be in a homosexual lifestyle. It’s not even that which breaks my heart. It’s his disdain toward the God that created him. His heart is as hard as Pharaoh’s. Today I know where his eternity stands and it truly saddens me.
I have another friend who is gay. I love him to pieces. He’s one of the coolest, most kindhearted people you’ll ever meet. He’s married to another man and they seem to be happy together. I’ve heard him talk about God and he’s even asked for prayer in certain situations.
He has been burned by the church on numerous occasions, and unfortunately, his view of God is skewed. Those who have burned him will have to answer for their own sin of judgment without grace. He believes he is going to heaven and I have to disagree.
But it has nothing to do with his decision to be gay.
It has everything to do with the fact that he hasn’t accepted Jesus Christ as his Savior. He hasn’t taken to heart that according to John 14:6, Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life, and no one comes to the Father except through Him.
But I am excited because I believe he has a desire to know God more. I believe he has allowed Satan and the world to define him as a gay. He doesn’t know who he is in Christ and I look forward to the day he learns.
He doesn’t truly know he is living in sin, because he doesn’t have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
If a person doesn’t realize homosexuality is a sin, we do need to tell them, but not with a Bible opened to the Old Testament in one hand, a picket sign in the other, and the word abomination on our lips.
What if we as Christians actually took the time to build a relationship with someone in this lifestyle? What if got outside of our safe, Christian bubble and tried to understand their world? What if we pursued a friendship?
Stay tuned for the final part of this excerpt. You can have blog posts sent directly to your inbox when they’re published by signing up below.
March 3, 2014
Jesus, Meryl Streep, and The Oscars
Can you imagine being called to deliver to a pizza party, only to find out Ellen plans to drag you into the crowd with the likes of Angelina Jolie, Meryl Streep, Julia Roberts, and more?
photo credit: eonline
The guy delivering the pizzas was not an actor, but actually a real delivery man whose life will never be the same. I’m impressed at how calm and collected he remained. I probably couldn’t have done the same.
Seeing him get to do something he never expected to happen reminded me of how amazing God’s love is.
He wants to lavish us with surprises!
No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him. – 1 Corinthians 2:9
I’ve talked to so many who seem to think God is this distant God ready to punish us around every corner, just waiting for our next screw up. Oh, friends, that’s not the God I know.
He wants to give us the desires of our hearts. (Psalm 37:4)
He loves us with an everlasting love. (Jeremiah 31:3)
If He’s waiting to surprise us, shouldn’t we be waiting, too?
I’m excited to see what He does for you when you least expect it. You never know. He could toss you in front of some of the greatest actors in the world because of something as simple as a pizza.
Look for his blessings today. They’re all around you.
What did you enjoy about the Oscars? Share below…
February 27, 2014
Why Your New Years Resolutions Have Failed
It’s February. The excitement of your New Year’s Resolution has probably worn off by now.
You’ve already failed ten times on your new “life changing” diet. Your resolution to be more patient with your kids went to the wayside on day three when you walked into the hurricane they like to call their room.
So, you’re feeling down. 2015 is a ways away. What will you do for the next 10 months? May I make a suggestion?
Stop making resolutions and start setting goals.
What’s the difference?
Let’s use weight loss as an example. A resolution says, “I want to lose 30 lbs.” A goal says, “I want to lose 30 lbs. by July 31, 2014 and here’s how I’m going to do it.”
Resolutions are dreams in your head that never come to pass. Goals are something you make tangible before you. 25 percent of people abandon their New Year’s resolutions after one week, according to Michael Hyatt.
You have to get to the why behind your goal.
It’s easy to know the what. You want to lose weight. More specifically, you want to lose 30 lbs. Why?
Allow me to share one of my goals with you.
I want to pay off $3,000 of medical debt by December 31, 2014. My key motivation, my why, is because I want to be one step closer to financial freedom.
Here are some more motivations: Without debt I can start a college fund for Caleb, my little cousin. I won’t have to feel controlled by debt. I can teach others about financial responsibility. I could possibly write another book based on my experiences.
Keep your goals in front of you.
I consistently look at my goals. Sometimes more than once per week. I want to be reminded of the why behind my what. I track my progress. I look at my motivations and ask myself, What is getting in the way of my goals becoming reality?
At this point in my life $3,000 is a lot of money to pay off in one year, but it’s not impossible, especially if I keep remembering my why. Caleb and I often talk about his future plans and it’s a reminder to me that he’s almost 13 and I’ve got to get in gear if I’m going to help him with college.
Michael Hyatt, author, speaker, and goal expert, who has been a catalyst in helping me set goals and keep them, is someone I highly recommend you pay attention to when it comes to setting goals vs. making resolutions. Check out his course, 5 Days to Your Best Year Ever. The course is closed for now and I don’t know when he’ll open it up again. I can promise you this, it will open your eyes to the way you strive to make your biggest dreams come true in life.
What goals are you working on in 2014? Share in the comments below…
February 25, 2014
Stay Away from the Wicked Part Two
Food is often a struggle for me. Some days it seems to be the thorn in my side. I’ve lost 145 pounds, but it wasn’t easy. Guess what? It’s still not easy trying to keep it off.
There are days I stop fighting the battle and give in to overeating. There are days I choose my feelings over the truth, and the next thing I know I’m feeling the regret of my choices. It’s a struggle and I hate it.
But despite my struggles and sin, God is still there with open arms, waiting for me to return to Him and not the comforts of food. I repent. I receive His grace. I run to His arms. I accept His forgiveness. I get back on track. And then . . . I mess up again.
But the glory is in the struggle.
And as Joyce Meyer often says, “I’m not where I need to be, but thank God I’m not where I used to be.”
My struggle with food doesn’t make me a bad person. It makes me a real person, with real struggles. Whether it’s food, drugs, working too much, or homosexuality, we’re all broken people in need of a savior.
John 10:28 tells us that Jesus gave us eternal life and no one can snatch that away from us. This is not, however, an excuse to keep sinning, as we discussed earlier.
If someone living in the homosexual lifestyle comes to know Jesus Christ, then they are a new creation in Christ Jesus. But what if they don’t act that way?
I came to know Jesus Christ in 2006. By that time, I had been in a homosexual relationship for four years. I didn’t immediately break off that relationship and everything was fine. For one reason, I still didn’t know what I was doing was wrong. Why? I was ignorant to what God’s Word said.
I was saved on July 31, 2006, sitting in the office of my home. What would have happened if, on August 1, I died in a car accident? Would I be in hell?
The answer is no. I had received eternal life twenty-four hours earlier by my decision to follow Jesus Christ. Though I was still walking in my sins, I was saved by grace. Eternal salvation was mine to keep.
It took me five months to end that relationship. Why? Because I was fighting my flesh. I was battling against conviction and my emotions. It wasn’t someone telling me I was going to hell that helped me make that decision. It was the Holy Spirit guiding me. It was prayer. It was journaling. It was begging God to help me and show me the right way. It was learning who I really was in Christ, one step at a time.
Fast forward seven years later. What if I was still in that relationship? What if I was still claiming to be a follower of Christ, knowing what the Bible says about my sin, yet saying, “Oh well . . . I’m going to do it anyway”? Then I would have to question my salvation experience in the first place.
The same goes for drugs, alcohol, food, stealing, etc. If you are purposefully and deliberately operating in those sins, knowing they too are an “abomination,” then your salvation should be in question.
Please know that I realize we all struggle.
If an alcoholic falls and has a drink, his salvation is not in question. If a drug addict, after two years of being clean, gives into her feelings and emotions and gives in to her desires to snort a line of cocaine, she is not bound to hell for doing so. If someone who has struggled with homosexuality in the past, accepted Jesus Christ as their Savior, yet has a one night stand with someone of the same sex, their salvation is not lost.
True repentance changes that. True repentance doesn’t allow us to stay where we’re at. It keeps us in the process of growing to be more like Christ daily, through our struggles.
Stay tuned for part three of this excerpt. You can have blog posts sent directly to your inbox when they’re published by signing up below.
February 20, 2014
Why Food is Killing Us
In the next 18 minutes after you read this, four Americans that are alive will be dead from the food that they eat.
Yes. I said that. Actually, it wasn’t me. It was Jamie Oliver in his Ted talk titled “Teach every child about food.”
Allow me to share some statistics with you regarding obesity in the United States, according to Oliver:
Diet-related disease is the biggest killer in the United States, right now, here today.This is a global problem.It’s a catastrophe.It’s sweeping the world.
Obesity costs Americans 10 percent of our healthcare bills, 150 billion dollars a year. In 10 years, it’s set to double: 300 billion dollars a year.
Your children are getting fast food everyday, highly processed with additives and ingredients you cannot pronounce.
It’s profoundly important that every single American child leaves school knowing how to cook 10 recipes that will save their life.
Now here are some statistics, according to me:
When it says fat-free, run.
When it says sugar-free, run.
We’re an entitled nation looking for a quick fix with food.
I’m watching people around me die due to obesity and food addiction.
Sugar is killing us.
Are you ready to do something about it?
Don’t miss this alarming, but true video. It’s only 18 minutes and it’s worth your time. I promise.
February 18, 2014
Stay Away from the Wicked
The Bible defines a wicked person in many ways. I love the description in Proverbs 6:12–16. God calls wicked people constant liars. He says their hearts are perverted and they plot evil. They’re constantly stirring up trouble. And He says in an instant they will be destroyed, broken beyond all hope of healing.
Leviticus 20:13 is the famous passage that both Christians and those in the homosexual lifestyle use against one another: “If a man practices homosexuality, having sex with another man as with a woman, both men have committed a detestable act. They must both be put to death, for they are guilty of a capital offense” (NLT).
Some translations replace detestable with the word abomination. This is where the Christians come in. We judge those practicing the homosexual lifestyle and tell them what an abomination they are.
Often times, especially in the older generation, I see homosexuality looked at as a disease.
What if it’s contagious? Many are afraid if they socialize with someone in that lifestyle, they’ll “catch something.” Give me a break! I understand much of this has been taught and passed on through generations, just as hatred toward the African American community has. But when does it end?
Christians have been taught to categorize people in the homosexual lifestyle. It is assumed they are different than us. How crazy is that? They don’t have six ears and two heads. They put their pants on the same way a heterosexual does. They drive cars. Some are doctors, lawyers, architects. Why do so many people not realize this?
On the other side of it, many homosexuals use this verse to say it doesn’t apply anymore because of the New Testament Covenant.
May I say both parties are wrong?
I am not here to debate whether or not homosexuality is a sin. We could go on for days between arguments. That is not my goal.
We as the church (the body of Christ) need to stop using this one verse to condemn homosexuality and forgetting about the other parts of the Bible that discuss grace, mercy, forgiveness, and God’s love.
Now, if someone living in the homosexual lifestyle wants to dig deeper and trusts me enough to speak truth to them, then I will be happy to sit down and talk more about the subject. But I won’t use their lifestyle choice to condemn them and “scare them out of hell.”
Those practicing the homosexual lifestyle need to stop using this verse to excuse their actions, meanwhile ignoring the rest of Scripture. Especially those who know what the Word says versus those who do not.
The truth is, we are all wicked. From the time we are born, we’re sinners. We live in an evil world, and we ourselves do evil. It is grace that takes that label from us.
We are all broken people in need of a savior.
Salvation doesn’t make us exempt from brokenness. It doesn’t keep us from struggling with sin and wickedness. Though there are times people are immediately set free from their struggles, most of the time it is a process. We don’t all get knocked off our horses on a dirt road like Paul. Even he still had his struggles after that.
Stay tuned for a follow up to this excerpt. You can have blog posts sent directly to your inbox when they’re published by signing up below.
February 14, 2014
Why We Have to Love the Crazy Cat Lady
Who is your neighbor? The crazy cat lady? The guy who mows the yard in his underwear? (Does that only happen to me?)
When I first read Mark 12:31 and it told me to love my neighbor, I just assumed those words literally meant I just had to love the cat lady and the half naked guy. I was wrong.
I’m not simply required to love those within 500 feet of me. I’m required to love everyone.
Everyone is our neighbor.
That means the difficult, different, or dangerous people in our lives. Yeah, we have to love them. I mean, I guess we don’t have to, but Jesus said this commandment was as equally as important as number one, which is to love God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength. So it makes sense that we would desire to want to love our neighbors as much as we love the God who created us.
Honestly, there are days I don’t feel like loving people, especially those I don’t understand. I’m often convinced the world would be a better place if people would think like me. I’ll tell you this. If they did, Algebra, cottage cheese, and high heels wouldn’t exist.
What does loving my neighbor look like?
First, let’s look at what the word love means. To love includes affection, tenderness, compassion, warmth. So, maybe don’t go buy the cat lady some food to feed her flock and enable her to adopt five more, but drop by her house and offer her your friendship.
You most likely want to bring the guy on the lawn mower a shirt. Instead, bring him a sandwich and a glass of lemonade. You may just get your own lawn mowed out of the deal, just sayin’.
What if we passed out bottled water at the gay pride parade instead of holding up picket signs?
Don’t think you can only love your neighbor if you agree on everything.
Again, I’d assume not watch you eat cottage cheese, but it doesn’t mean I won’t take you out to lunch. If you’re a Republican, take a Democrat out to lunch. I promise the place won’t burn down if a Catholic has coffee with a Baptist.
If you’re a Christian, hang out with those who aren’t. They put their pants on the same way as you do.
Jesus met a woman at a well once who barely had enough fingers to count the number of men he had been with. He didn’t run from her. He offered her love. She was different and difficult. And according to the rules, He wasn’t even supposed to be seen talking to a woman, much less a Samaritan woman. She was dangerous and He embraced her anyway. (See John 4)
Who have you embraced lately? Are you loving your “safe” neighbors, or embracing the difficult, different, and dangerous?
Go and be different. You won’t regret it.
February 11, 2014
How to Pursue Your Dreams Like a Snail
I’m a sucker for a good animated movie. Even more so when the movie has a message that has a deeper meaning.
photo credit: flickeringmyth
Enter Turbo.
The movie is about Theo, an underdog snail with big dreams and a deep passion to become the fastest racer in the world. He’s also an outcast to those around him. Though others don’t believe in his abilities to race, Theo never gives up on pursuing his dreams. He lives by this motto:
No dream is too big, and no dreamer is too small.
He’s a snail for the love of Pete. All odds are stacked against him, but after an accident gives him super-speed, he’s not looking so crazy anymore. He winds up at the Indy 500, wins the race, and changes history.
Why? Because he didn’t let fear hold him back. We can’t either.
We have to let our passions outweigh our fears. (Tweet that)
Leave the tomato factory for something more.
Theo worked alongside his older brother and the rest of the snails, waiting for the tomatoes to fall from the vine each day so they could have dinner. While everyone around him settled, too afraid of the unknown to step (or scoot) out into the grass, Theo couldn’t do the routine day in and day out stuff anymore. He knew he was called to something greater.
Getting to that something great requires us to go beyond on what we know.
If you know you’re supposed to do it, then do it.
Theo could have listened to the words of his negative brother and taken his place as just another snail going through the motions, but he choose not to. He didn’t let others’ negativity hold him back. He pursued his dreams, even though his only family member told him he was crazy.
We won’t always do what looks normal to others, and if they’re afraid of change, they won’t support us. Do it anyway, unless of course you’re trying out for American Idol and you just really can’t sing. If that’s the case, listen to them, for your sake and for the millions of viewers watching at home. It’s important to be the best version of you.
Find others dreaming the same dream.
Theo wound up at a run down taco joint where he met a few other outcast snails. On his way to the Indy 500, it was these “out of the box” thinkers supporting him. They knew his dream was crazy, but so was theirs. If he failed he failed, but at least he tried, and he had a cheering section behind him regardless.
If you fail you fail, but at least you tried.
It’s not over until you quit.
At the end of the race, Theo’s shell is broken and he loses his speed. For a split second he ducks for cover in his shell and gives up. But those supporters, and even his previously negative brother, come to his rescue to say, “You were made for more.” He’s only feet away from the finish line and he has a choice. Go for it or quit.
He perseveres and without his super speed, moves inches at a time until he reaches the finish line. Other racers tried to destroy him, but he kept moving forward and didn’t look back. He won what was considered impossible.
When is the last time you strived for the “impossible”?
February 7, 2014
How to Exercise When the Cold Sets In and a Book Giveaway
I don’t know where you are right now, but I’m in Missouri and it’s freezing.
Photo Credit: Katarina 2353 via Compfight cc
We got hit with an unexpected snow the other day that left a 15-car pile up on the road I use to get home. Thankfully, I was three hours away, driving in the sunshine.
Not only can winter cause traffic jams, it can wreck our exercise routine.
But it doesn’t have to. We can think of a million reasons to use the winter as a reason not to stay fit. But honestly, when it comes down to it, they’re just excuses.
Here are four suggestion to keep you fit during the winter:
Use a workout video.
No, you don’t have to sweat to the oldies with Richard Simmons, but hey, it’s actually kinda fun. There are so many good workout DVD’s out there. I’m stocked up on The Biggest Loser Bootcamp, You Won’t Be Able to Walk for a Week After You Do This Workout with Jillian Michaels (Okay, it’s actually called Banish Fat Boost Metabolism, but it’s all the same), and a few others.
Most videos run from 30-45 minutes, giving you plenty of time to workout in your living room.
Invest in a treadmill or elliptical machine.
I know not everyone has the money to go out and buy exercise equipment. If you do, then make the investment. If you don’t, search for a deal on Craigslist, or share the news with your friends on Facebook. That’s exactly what I did. I was looking for a used treamdill and a week later someone graciously gave me one.
Right now it’s covered with a suticase and a pile of clothes, but it gets used on the days I can’t get my car out of the driveway. I’m curious if my new dog will take to it as well.
Do a deep clean in your house.
You’d be surprised how many calories you can burn while sweeping and mopping in those nooks you haven’t seen in three years. Go through those old boxes in the garage you’ve had on your t0-do list for a while. Do your dishes by hand.
And you must dance. Don’t just sweep the kitchen floor. Sing into the broom handle like you’re Tina Turner. You think those legs just came naturally to her? No. I imagine she’s used a dust pan a few times in her life. Maybe not. I dunno.
Embrace your inner rebel and go outside.
By this time the snow plows have cleared the roads enough for you to know you’re not falling into your neighbors ditch.
You can do it! Bundle up nicely, layers preferabbly. Grab the running shoes and the lip balm, put “Eye of the Tiger” on your iPod and run like the wind.
I’m sure you can think of several other ways to keep yourself going in the midst of winter blues. Just remember to keep your heart rate up, try to workout for a minimum of 30 minutes, and be creative and have fun!
I’m giving away one copy of Faithfully Fit: A 40-Day Devotional Plan to End the Yo-Yo Lifestyle of Chronic Dieting to one lucky winner.
For your chance to win, you must:
Leave a comment below. Tell me what creative things you do in the winter to keep exercise in your routine.
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February 5, 2014
The Grammy’s and the Church Collide
My response to the Grammy’s controversial mass ceremonies performed on stage may be delayed, but my heart needed prayerful time to respond. It’s actually not my response to the event I’m writing about today, it’s the response to a fellow brother in Christ that I feel led to confront.
photo credit: fox news
I woke up to read this response to to the event with a sad heart.
“Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; Who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; Who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes, And prudent in their own sight!”
(Isaiah 5:20–21)
Flaunting sin before a Holy God.
First of all, allow me to say I respect the writer of these words. I believe he loves God and has a desire to see no one be separated from God. However, I am disturbed by the judgment I read in his words.
This year, the Grammy Awards weren’t just about the music, they were also about making a statement in the same-sex marriage debate.
Heavily hyped in the hours leading up to Sunday night’s show, 34 couples — both gay and straight — exchanged rings and said “I do,” as officiated on stage by Queen Latifah. The actress/rapper/talk show host was recently deputized by Los Angeles County to legally conduct wedding ceremonies and will sign the marriage certificates for each couple.
The event took place on a stage set to resemble a giant chapel with stained-glass windows during a performance by hip-hop duo Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, in which they sang their hit tune “Same Love,” a song embraced by the LGBT community last year.”
We are seeing Romans 1 worked out before our very eyes.
So what would Jesus say–what DID He say:?
“Have you not read….:”
“Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?”
(Matthew 19:4–5)
Really the battle about origins is a battle over authority–who is the authority, God or man! And it’s a battle of world views–secular humanism (moral relativism) and Christianity (moral absolutes).
To all my believing friends, may I ask this question?
If you were a non-believer, would any of these words draw you closer to the God whom created you? I would have to say no.
Dr. Henry Cloud said, “Truth without grace is judgment.” He is right.
As Christians, we should share the truth. It’s our responsibility to share the Gospel with the world. It’s our duty as followers of Jesus Christ to be a light in a dark world.
But, oh, please hear my heart. So many of our words, much like the above mentioned, are not spreading light. They are simply spreading judgment, confusion, and a lack of love.
Before I became a follower of Christ, had you written on your Facebook page, as a well-respected Christian, “Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil,” I would have walked away confused. Confused because I didn’t know the Lord. Confused because I had no clue who Jesus was. Confused because of your condemnation of me without giving me a true explanation of the love of Christ.
Dear Church, I’m not saying you shouldn’t share Scripture with others. But I am asking you to consider how you say it. I’m not asking you to stand back and keep your faith a secret. But I am asking you to share your faith with grace. I’m asking you to respond out of a love for Christ, and a true desire to see no one depart from the Lord, not out of judgment.
Let’s take Natalie Grant for example. Of course she’s been under fire, accused of leaving during a certain performance. But her words. Her words exude grace. Her words don’t deny her love for Jesus, nor do they condemn. You can read the rest of the amazing story on Natalie here.
I am honored to be a part of the Christian music community. I’ve had many people throughout my career ask why I never tried to go in to mainstream music and last night was a beautiful reminder that I love singing about Jesus and FOR Jesus.
I’ve judged no one. I hate no one. And I believe that every person has been created in the image of God. I will never stand on a street corner and wave a sign, I won’t use my platform to engage in political arguments that will only divide and not unite. I will continue to pray that my life will be my message. I do have my own personal convictions that I live by, and I will continue to work out my own salvation with fear and trembling before the Lord.
Dear Church, people are watching you. Non-believers from every race, gender, age, and sexual orientation are watching you. They’re listening. They’re waiting.
People don’t go to hell because they choose homosexuality. Someone doesn’t go to hell because they’re an alcoholic. Someone doesn’t go to hell for having a one-night stand.
People go to hell because they don’t know Jesus Christ. What are we as the church doing to change that?
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. – Colossians 3:12
Dear Church, let us walk in love. Compassion. Kindness. Humility. Gentleness. Patience.
