Edward Lorn's Blog, page 64

Happy Fourth of July (Paying it forward with some free Audible swag)

 

Happy Independence Day! Try not to go deaf shooting off whistlers today, because I have something for your earballs!

 

I don’t know much, but I know I love you guys (Booklikes, Goodreads, and WordPress users, along with anyone else who follows me across this vast expanse of internet). Moreover, I don’t have much to give, but I have an ass-load of Audible codes. 

 

So here’s what we’re going to do. Because everyone’s been so awesome, I’m giving back to the community. Sadly, I can only offer audiobooks. Good news is, this giveaway isn’t exclusive to books I’ve written. I’ll be sending you a code. Buy whatever you want with it. No restrictions. 

 

Let’s start out with ten codes. That’s a nice round number. At least half of it is (ba dump tst!).

 

All you have to do is comment on this post. That’s it. I will then message you with a code. If you’re in the top ten comments and don’t receive a code, please remember that this post will be shared across four different blogging platforms and I will be using timestamps to decide who the first ten commenters are. Also, if you’re commenting anywhere other than Booklikes and Goodreads, you will need to email me to receive your code, as I will have no way to contact you. But we’ll cross that bridge if and when we get there. 

 

International Audible customers: These are Audible US codes, so they will not work for you. But there is a way around that. If you are one of the top ten commenters, I will message you asking you what book you would like. I will then gift it to you. Problem solved. 

 

Final stipulation: I am posting this crazy early in the US because I know people will be out and about later today, grilling and boozing and attempting to have fun with explosives without blowing their tender bits off, so I’m limiting international readers (those of you already about your day) to five codes. That’s half, and half seems fair to me.

 

To those of you who don’t enjoy audiobooks, my apologies. Summer is notoriously slow where books sales are concerned and money is tight at the moment. Come see me after Halloween. 

 

Commenting starts now!

 

*hugs and high fives*

 

E.

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1195608/happy-fourth-of-july-paying-it-forward-with-some-free-audible-swag

I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things.To...

I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things.

Tom Waits

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1195404/post

A Very Special Gift from a Friend.

A little more than a week ago, I posted THIS. If you’ll read all the way to the end of that post, you’ll see that I mention only needing three more books to completely rebuild my mother’s book collection, the one we lost most of during Hurricane Opal in 1995. 

 

Well, today this came in the mail.

 

 

That’s a first edition from 1979. The book is in terrific condition. Probably better condition than my mother’s copy before it suffered irreparable water damage. Jessica (Hopelessly Devoted Bibliophile) bought it for me. I cannot adequately express how much this means to me. Thank you, Jessica. 

 

*hugs and high fives*

 

E.

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1195400/a-very-special-gift-from-a-friend

The Fold Review

Review:

Before I begin my review it should be known that I pretty much hate science fiction literature. I couldn’t even finish Andy Weir’s uber-popular novel, The Martian. I hadn’t heard of Robert Heinlein until last year, and I cannot recall the last sci fi novel I actually finished. When it comes to movies, I don’t like Star Trek, and if Star Wars didn’t exist I wouldn’t be upset. That being said, I love science fiction movies with a strong horror element.Event Horizon, The Thing, and Sphere are three of my favorite films.

But this book? This book right here? This book is fucking awesome.

I started Peter Clines’s The Fold at 11pm last night. It is now 5:30am and I am finished. I’ve read mixed reviews, but I’m here to say that I found absolutely nothing wrong with it. The Fold is gargantuan fun from beginning to end. In fact this review is going to be all over the place because I don’t have any complaints. I’m just going to tell you what I liked while trying not to spoil anything for you. Because you really should go into this book knowing nothing about it. Let the joy of discovery wash over you. Or, you know, whatever.

The first thing I will mention is the attention to detail where character development is concerned. Mike, our MC, is a genius with an IQ of 180 and an eidetic memory. I’ve read about these types of people several times before but Clines delves into aspects of this character I never would have considered. How someone with a photographic memory deals with loss. What goes through their minds during sex. If other authors have tackled these ideas, I’ve not come across them. All I know is that Clines did it well. I shed a tear listening to Mike explain how everyone he’s ever lost replays perpetually in his mind because it is literally impossible for him to forget.

The insane happenings of this book was another huge plus for me. I had no idea what was coming next, and I sure as shit did not expect the second half of the book. It gets pretty fucking epic by the end. I certainly did not plan to read this in one sitting. But after the halfway mark it was impossible to put down.

Finally, the science. I loved the way Clines explained the unexplainable without really explaining anything. If you read this, you’ll understand. In the hands of a less-capable author, the how of the device would have come off as a cheat. Not here. It makes sense, and leaves just enough to the reader’s imagination.

In summation: The Fold is the perfect blend of action, what-if tech, and creature-feature. This book is definitely in the running for my favorite of 2015. All the fucking stars. Highest possible recommendation.

Final Judgment: Don’t’cha wish your sci fi was cool like me? DON’T’CHA?!

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1194573/the-fold-review

Randomized Randomocity #163

An individual donated $100,000 for the Girl Scouts of America with the stipulation that the money could not be used to aid transgender girls. 

 

The GSA kindly told this person to fucketh off. Knowing that this kind of money would have made available over 500 scholarships, the GSA took to Kickstarter to replace the funds. In the past two days, they have raised over $280,000.

 

Fuck H8. Eat Cookies.

 

Indiegogo Page: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/girl-scouts-is-foreverygirl#/story

 

Original story: http://sourcefed.com/girl-scouts-raise-185k-after-declining-donation/

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1194468/randomized-randomocity-163

A Bit of My Childhood Reclaimed

They have arrived. It’s a good day. No way this smile is going anywhere.

 

 

The final picture is a section of tear-away calendar I found in the back of STORMBRINGER. Someone had used it as a bookmark. Notice the date. 

 

The seller found these in a box in his attic. They are the First DAW printings of the Elric of Melnibone Saga and are the first time the original unaltered text was used. Michael Moorcock was unhappy with the versions Lancer published in 1972, as they were heavily edited without his approval. These are the author’s preferred editions. Honestly, I feel as if I stumbled across someone selling buried treasure. 

 

I loved this series growing up, and they remain some of the only fantasy novels I’ve enjoyed aside from Tolkien. I lost my copies when my storage shed flooded in 2004. Finding these books in this condition… Man, it doesn’t get much better.

 

Thanks for allowing me to share this with you.

 

*hugs and high fives*

 

E.

 

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1194326/a-bit-of-my-childhood-reclaimed

The Girl on the Train DNF Review

Decline to rate. DNF @ 50 pages, but I only actually read maybe 35 pages.

I have a 15 or 50 Rule. If you’re a film, you get 15 minutes to pique my interest. If you’re a book, you get 50 pages to engage me.

Well, sports fans, I am not engaged. The book might be brilliant, but I can’t be bothered. After thirty pages of rambling and not getting anywhere, I started to skim. I rarely skim. Skimming is a sign that something is wrong.

Bad part is, there’s nothing really wrong with this book. There’s nothing really right either. There are words. The author wrote stuff. Loads of people like the words the author wrote, so I’m sure there must be a reason for all these words. The problem is that, after 35 pages read, and 15 skimmed, I see no point of continuing. So I’m not. There. Problem solved.

In summation: I guess this is so long. Farewell. Alvetersain. Good bye.

Final Judgment: Anyone wanna buy a brand new hardcover?

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1194128/the-girl-on-the-train-dnf-review

Rant Review

Review:

It’s not everyday you read a book about rabies, the origins of God, time travel, and bumper cars. Seeing that this is a Chuck Palahniuk book, I shouldn’t be surprised that this novel hops barriers and barrels through genres without a single fuck given for your comfort or confusion level.

Buster “Rant” Casey can tell you want you had for breakfast three days ago, what kind of flowers you have waiting in a vase back at home, and whether your shower head is steel or bronze simply by eating your pussy. That’s talent folks. Of course, all this is explained, but for a while all you can do is laugh. Rant: An Oral Biography of Buster Casey is so fucking absurd that you will begin to think you are reading bizarro fiction. And then, about 2/3 of the way through, everything starts making a shade of lunatic sense. Before it’s all over everything is explained and you’re left wondering how in the Great Balls of CHrist Palahniuk managed to juggle all these different voices and plot threads into one cogent narrative.

Invisible Monsters is still my favorite of his works, but this is the new runner up. SorryChoke, but this book is smarter than you. Don’t feel bad. You’re still good, but not as good as Rant

Funny side note: I didn’t finish this the first time I read it because it seemed like a book full of character interviews and I fucking hate that shit. This time I powered through. Damn glad I did. All the fucking stars!

In summation: You’ll need your thinking caps if you’re going to appreciate this one. The book is written the way it is for a reason. Every character is important, and all thread tie together by the end. A lot of people will hate this book. I get that. But it does not deserve their hatred.

Final Judgment: Fight Club references are rad.

Glamor Shot – E Edition #HAWT

This Glamor Shot is brought to you by the letter E for ELECTRIC!

 

(All your Glamor Shots are fantastic. You’re all so #hawt!)

 

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1193803/glamor-shot-e-edition-hawt

Drunken Fireworks Review

Review:

“Drunken Fireworks” will be available in print in November when The Bazaar of Bad Dreams releases. Until then, we have this audiobook version narrated by Tim Sample. Oh, did I mention this came out today. Because it did. HAPPY STEPHEN KING RELEASE DAY!

I’m not sure this story will be as good in writing as it is as an audiobook, but I wanna believe it will be. Part of the fun I had was listening to Sample’s hilarious delivery and character acting. I found myself laughing out loud more than once, and fully enjoyed the experience. I miss living in Maine. I really do.

That being said (I hate when I feel I must do this), this is not horror. I like the fact that it wasn’t horror. I actually prefer literary King to horror King, and that’s saying something, considering King is my favorite horror author. He’s simply a better writer when he’s not trying to explain his monsters.

“Drunken Fireworks” sees Uncle Stevie returning to Castle County to have a bit of fun with two warring families who try to oneup each other every July 4. Shenanigans ensue and laughs are had. Disaster even rears its ugly head by the end, but the story is never truly dark. It’s light hearted and, I believe, intended to make you walk away with a smile on your face. The story was a bright, refreshing change of pace. Like a glass of ice water after a night of imbibing.

In summation: Tim Sample’s narration is awesome. Big fun with a New England accent. Ayuh, I’d recommend it.

Final Judgment: Drunks and fireworks mix beautifully.

Original post:

edwardlorn.booklikes.com/post/1192594/drunken-fireworks-review