Christina Bauer's Blog, page 65
January 14, 2017
Why I Moved The Dimension Drift Launch
To begin with, there is good news and bad news. The good news is that Monster House Books has seven launches in 2017! Now for the bad news. To make all these new releases possible, I had to move prequel novella #1 in the Dimension Drift (DD) series to 2018. Why? It all started with the Beholder books, which turned out to be a far darker series than I had ever planned. That became a problem and here’s why:
Christina + dark series = bitch to live with.
When I’m writing dark stuff, I’m really no fun to be around. My family asked me to stop the train to Morose-ville, so I promised them that my next series would be fun-fun-fun. Enter Dimension Drift. DD was going to be a humorous take on the all-too-often ponderous genre of dystopian future. Nothing can go wrong, right?
And then, something did go horribly wrong: the 2016 election cycle.
Suddenly, writing about a dystopian future with any sense of humor got to be a MAJOR challenge for yours truly. All the fun of my previous drafts disintegrated. Getting a single word on the page became downright painful. In the end, I decided to take a break from DD and focus on WOLVES & ROSES (Fairy Tales of the Magicorum) instead. The series combines of shifters, snark, and classics from the Brothers Grimm.
With a little distance, I feel confident that I can get back to the fun side of the DD books. In the meantime, WOLVES & ROSES is definitely a blast to write and while I’m at it, DD is still rattling around my head and ‘wants out,’ so I don’t think I can push it past 2018 anyway.
Long story short, the writing-side of my brain always gets what it wants in the end. Thanks in advance for understanding 
January 1, 2017
Wolves & Roses Cover Reveal – Sign Ups Live!
Don’t want to participate in the reveal…but still want to see the awesome new cover? Then be sure to check back here on Wednesday, January 18th when the cover and pre-orders will be live!
Description
Seventeen-year-old Bryar Rose has a problem. She’s descended from one of the three magical races—shifters, fairies, or witches. That makes her one of the Magicorum, and Magicorum always follow a fairy tale life template. In Bryar’s case, that template should be Sleeping Beauty.
“Should” being the key word.
Trouble is, Bryar is nowhere near the sleeping beauty life template. Not even close. She doesn’t like birds or woodland creatures. She can’t sing. And she certainly can’t stand Prince Philpot, the so-called “His Highness of Hedge Funds” that her aunties want her to marry. Even worse, Bryar’s having recurring dreams of a bad boy hottie and is obsessed with finding papyri from ancient Egypt. What’s up with that?
All Bryar wants is to attend a regular high school with normal humans and forget all about shifters, fairies, witches, and the curse that Colonel Mallory the Magnificent placed on her. And she might be able to do just that–if only she can just keep her head down until her eighteenth birthday when the spell that’s ruined her life goes buh-bye.
But that plan gets turned upside down when Bryar Rose meets Knox, the bad boy who’s literally from her dreams. Knox is a powerful werewolf, and his presence in her life changes everything, and not just because he makes her knees turn into Jell-O. If Bryar can’t figure out who—or what—she really is, it might cost both her and Knox their lives… as well as jeopardize the very nature of magic itself.
The post Wolves & Roses Cover Reveal – Sign Ups Live! appeared first on Monster House Books.
December 30, 2016
What’s Coming In 2017?
SPRING RELEASES
Angelbound Audio Book
I used to be a disc jockey in college—and I also got my BA in Audio Production—so sound and voice are very important to me. In fact, they’re both so critical that I often read my books aloud while writing. I never thought much about it until I recorded the voice over for my Angelbound trailer. Folks liked the read so much, I thought ‘why not record the whole book?’ That way, everyone can know the voices as I planned them. (Hint: Sharkie and Zeke are my favorites!) The audio book version of ANGELBOUND officially launches March 28th.
Beholder Cherished
Readers want to know…Who will Elea choose? Does she stay with Rowan or move on with Philippe? I’m not going to tell you now, but I will say this: all the answers will be live with CHERISHED on May 28th! Preorders are live now at Amazon, B&N, iBooks, and Kobo.
Fall Releases
New Fairy Tale Shifter Series
WOLVES & ROSES (Book 1 of the Fairy Tales of the Magicorum) is my new fairy tale shifter series. It also marks my very first release with full print support. What does that mean? For those of you who visit old fashioned brick and mortar stores, you’ll now be able to see this book on a shelf without first having to give up an ISBN, pound of flesh, and your Grandmother’s social security number. Huzzah and watch out for it on October 31st!
The Sleeper Princess Shall Awaken!
It’s been a joy to work with GIE as an editor, and I’m thrilled to help her bring this story to readers. MORIBUND, Book 1 of the Circuit Fae, is a kickass young adult F/F urban fantasy series. Watch our web site for details and the book itself will launch on September 12th!
Myla + Earth = Awesomesauce
This one is going to be so much fun, I can’t stand it! Lincoln gets kidnapped and replaced with a body double, so a very pregnant (and grumpy) Myla goes to Earth to rescue him. Myla drags Cissy along, so we get to see their relationship in some more depth. Also, Zeke shows up to ‘help,’ which is going to be hilarious. Angelbound THRAX (Book 4) will be released on September 26th… along with the audio book version of ACCA (Book 2). Preorders of THRAX are live now on Amazon, iBooks, B&N, and Kobo.
Beholder CROWNED
All the Beholder books have been leading to this… the BIG REVEAL about Elea’s true identity!!! I am DYING to blab what it is, but I will somehow keep my yap shut. Maybe. The title goes live on November 28th. CROWNED is now live for preorders at Amazon, B&N, and Kobo.
Moving to 2018
Dimension Drift is Moving to 2018
In order to make all of the above possible, I had to move prequel novella #1 in the Dimension Drift (DD) series to 2018. Why? It all started with the Beholder books, which turned out to be a far darker series than I had ever planned. That became a problem and here’s why:
Christina + dark series = bitch to live with.
When I’m writing dark stuff, I’m really no fun to be around. My family asked me to stop the train to Morose-ville, so I promised them that my next series would be fun-fun-fun. Enter Dimension Drift. DD was going to be a humorous take on the all-too-often ponderous genre of dystopian future. Nothing can go wrong, right?
And then, something did go horribly wrong: the 2016 election cycle.
Suddenly, writing about a dystopian future with any sense of humor got to be a MAJOR challenge for yours truly. All the fun of my previous drafts disintegrated. Getting a single word on the page became downright painful. In the end, I decided to take a break from DD and focus on the Magicorum instead. With a little distance, I feel confident that I can get back to the fun side of the DD books. In the meantime, Magicorum is definitely a blast to write and while I’m at it, DD is still rattling around my head and ‘wants out,’ so I don’t think I can push it past 2018 anyway.
Long story short, the writing-side of my brain always gets what it wants in the end 
December 27, 2016
Myla & Lincoln: The ACCA Interview
Susan Smiley: Welcome back. We’re very excited here at Good Morning, Purgatory. Today we have with us Myla Lewis, the Great Scala, and her fiancée Prince Lincoln.
Myla: He’s not my fiancée. We’re married.
Lincoln: (Smirks) We talked about this, Myla.
Myla: (Makes innocent face) We talked about what?
Lincoln: This is a book tour for ACCA. Christina Bauer wrote our story and we’re here to help her sell more novels. You’re not supposed to give away anything that happens in the books. It’s counter-productive.
Myla: (Taps chin.) There’s a loophole, but my brain is fudge right now.
Lincoln: There is indeed. You can say whatever you want as long as you start off by saying SPOILER ALERT.
Myla: (Snaps fingers.) That’s right. (Clears throat). Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye! This is a SPOILER ALERT! Now, are we all good? (Glares at Susan, eyes glowing red)
Susan: (Blood drains from face) Sure. We’re, uh, fine.
Myla: Okay, everybody. The book happened in the past and as of today, Lincoln and I have already gotten married. Also, he knocked me up and I’m super grouchy. That’s more fair warning than spoiler alert, though.
Lincoln: (Raises his hand) I’ll vouch for that.
Myla: In fact, someone better bring me some crackers like, now. I have the munchies.
Susan: (Calls to stage left.) Can someone get her crackers?
Myla: And I want a diet coke.
Lincoln: (Clears throat.) We talked about that, too.
Myla: Right. The baby. No diet coke.
(Terrified intern runs up and hands Myla a box of saltines.)
Myla: Thanks, kid. (Opens box, stuffs face, and talks through mouth full of crackers.) What’s up, Susan?
Susan: Well, you’re the Great Scala, the only being who can send souls to Heaven or Hell. Our viewers want to know… what’s it like to wield so much power?
Myla: It’s a pain in the ass, mostly. Except I can park wherever I want. That’s pretty much the big perk.
Susan: And what about you, Lincoln? (Blushes.) I can call you Lincoln, can’t I?
Lincoln: Of course.
Susan: You’re the High Prince of the Thrax, a race of demon fighters from Earth. Most of our viewers have never left Purgatory. We see some recordings of Earth on television reruns, but everyone wants to know… what’s it really like?
Lincoln: (Purses lips.) Filled with demons, mostly. Only humans can’t see them. Trust me, Purgatory is a nicer place to live.
Susan: (Blushes.) Thank you, Lincoln. I must say, you’re a… (Giggles.) Very fit man.
Myla: Back off. That’s my baby daddy.
Lincoln: Ever since Myla became pregnant, her demonic side is a little high-strung.
Myla: True that. I tried to fight a broom the other day. Long story.
Susan: How fascinating. Your mother is the President of Purgatory and your father is first consort as well, isn’t he?
Myla: Yup. He’s also an archangel.
Susan: What’s that like?
Myla: It’s like any girl living in her parent’s basement while being pregnant. Not too great. Lincoln and I are looking into getting our own place in Purgatory, but it isn’t easy.
Lincoln: We need a rooftop where her father can land safely. He’s a big fan of flying around.
Myla: What a pain. (Tips cracker box upside down, nothing comes out.) Well, I’m all out of crackers, which means I need to get some juice and a back rub. (Chucks box aside and turns to Lincoln.) You up for that?
Lincoln: (Leans in and whispers something in Myla’s ear. Her eyes glow red.)
Myla: (Hops to her feet.) We’re leaving RIGHT now, thank you very much. (Waves to camera.) Buy Christina’s book and write a review for crying out loud. These books won’t sell themselves.
Lincoln: (Takes Myla’s hand,) And keep an eye out for the next installment, THRAX, which is due out in the Fall of 2017.
Susan: Thank you both for visiting us here today. (Turns to camera.) I’m Susan Smiley, and this was Good Morning, Purgatory.
Want more ACCA stuff?
Why did I write ACCA after ARMAGEDDON? Get the inside story here.
Wonder what Myla looks like? Lincoln? Take a peek at my scrapbook of inspiration pictures
Check out the book on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Goodreads, iBooks, and Kobo
Get yourself a sample chapter now for free
Discover my fav quotes from the book
Listen to the playlist
The post Myla & Lincoln: The ACCA Interview appeared first on Monster House Books.
December 23, 2016
My Playlist for Angelbound ACCA
House Of The Rising Sun By Heavy Young Heathens
Great tune from the trailer for the remake of the Magnificent Seven.
DJ Shadow feat. Run The Jewels – Nobody Speak
The words to this song are awesome. As an insult/threat: “I’ll dress up like Santa and take pictures with your kids.”
Royal Deluxe – Dangerous
More from the Magbificent Seven remake. Total music to kick ass by.
Fatboy Slim – The Rockafeller Skank
Best song in the universe with the worst music video. Just close your eyes and listen.
Lady Gaga – Teeth
You can’t write a book about kick-ass chicks without including some Gaga. I love how she mixes a Native American chant in here.
Rolling Stones – Can’t Always Get What You Want
Once you read the book, you’ll get this one.
Want more ACCA stuff?
Why did I write ACCA after ARMAGEDDON? Get the inside story here.
Wonder what Myla looks like? Lincoln? Take a peek at my scrapbook of inspiration pictures
Check out the book on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Goodreads, iBooks, and Kobo
Get yourself a sample chapter now for free
Discover my fav quotes from the book
The post My Playlist for Angelbound ACCA appeared first on Monster House Books.
December 17, 2016
Angelbound ACCA: Why I wrote this after Armageddon
Here’s the deal. There are two Christina Bauers (not literally, but work with me here.) One is the Business-Me, who sets all the publishing deadlines and stuff. The other is the Writer-Me, who does the you-know-what. In the Angelbound series, Business-Me wanted a wedding at the end of Book #2, SCALA. It seemed logical, eight?
Writer-Me thought that was a shitty idea. Writer-Me wanted to dive into ARMAGEDDON.
So Business-Me overrode Writer-Me. Long story short, I forced myself to write the wedding scene anyway. After days of forced solitude with my computer, I had all of two pages to show for my pain. In this version of the wedding, Myla was all ooey-gooey about getting married. Lincoln looked awesome and said sweet stuff. Everyone showed up on time and cried at the right moment. Then, Business-Me thought everything through carefully (as Business-Me is won’t to do). The ensuing internal conversation went something like this:
Business-Me: This sucks!!! Myla and Lincoln can’t have a typical wedding. There has to be a battle. WTF?
Writer-Me: I want to write ARAMGEDDON.
Business-Me: Can’t we try to make this scene a little longer? Get some conflict in here? At least, have her break a stained glass window or something.
Writer-Me: What part of “I want to write ARMAGEDDON” was unclear to you?
Business-Me: Can she trip on her way sown the aisle?
Writer-Me: Keep fighting me on this and I won’t even write blogs for you.
In the end, it seemed best to skip the whole wedding scene and–you guessed it!–go right into ARMAGEDDON. By the way, this inner conflict (Business-Me versus Writer-Me) happens a lot. More often than not, Business-Me often wants to take Writer-Me out back and kick my own ass.
So I wrote and published Armageddon. People liked it. Still, some readers reached out and said they wanted the wedding story. And Writer-Me was like: “that’s fascinating, but I got nothing for you.”
Then, one day last summer, I was walking back from riding the Boston T and–WHAMMO–Writer-Me saw the whole wedding scene in my head. This was not, however, good timing for this revelation. Writer-Me and Business-Me had a pow-wow:
Business-Me: Can we hold off on the wedding for a while? We just outlined the MISTRESS DRAGON series, which tells the story of Portia and Tempest… as well as their kids. Everyone loves Portia and Tempest. I really want to explore them some more.
Writer-Me: I want to write ACCA. Now.
Business-Me: But we have the cover done. It looks really cool.
Writer-Me: (Covers ears) La-la-la-ACCA-la-la-la.
Business-Me: Can’t we negotiate?
Writer-Me: What I great idea! how’s this…You get me a mocha and then I write whatever the fuck I want. How’s that for a deal?
Business-Me: (sighs) ACCA.
So, there it is. Not the best answer the whole ‘Why ACCA now’ question, but it’s the truth. I’ve never been a linear thinker, if that’s any help. And yeah, I might also be a little nuts, but in my defense, I think the best people are. And to this day, I really have no idea how Writer-Me works. I’m just glad she keeps coming up with stuff that people want to read
December 13, 2016
Angelbound ACCA is here!
Option One: Stalk the book
Interested in reading the description or seeing some early reviews? Check out ACCA on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Goodreads, iBooks, and Kobo
Option Two: Try a Sample
Want all the fun of reading…But without the commitment of making an actual purchase? I got you covered. Click here to get a sample chapter now for free
Option Three: Visualize
Wonder what Myla looks like? Lincoln? Take a peek at my scrapbook of inspiration pictures
Option Four: Quotes, Quotes, Quotes
Why read an entire book when you can skim the best parts? I’ve got you covered there, too. You can see my fav quotes from the book right here
Option Five: GET FREE STUFF
And best of all, you can win Angelbound-themed jewelry by participating in our rafflecopter! Don’t miss out…click here or on the picture below to enter to win!
Now, please excuse me while I go dance around the kitchen for a while. ACCA is here!
The post Angelbound ACCA is here! appeared first on Monster House Books.
December 12, 2016
Back in the studio with my ‘spit noises’
Here’s how it worked. I got back into MixOne studio and was handed a list of things to fix (you can see a sample page in the pic below). After that, I re-recorded them. Sometimes it was no more than word! As a result, I learned a few things…
Revelation one: I add a ‘p’ into warmth.
I had no idea I did this, but apparently, I do. And it only took about twelve takes before I could get a warmth that had no ‘p’ in it. Go figure.
Revelation two: I make spit noises
And apprently, some are pretty bad. I don’t do it often, but as you can see in the notes below, yuck.
Revelation three: Coffee makes everything better
Technically, this is more of a reinforcement than a revelation. Near MixOne, they’re this hipster coffee hole called Pavement which still deigned to make me a mocha, even though I asked for it in the horrid Starbucks ‘grande’ format. Much faux confusion ensued before we were able to translate that into medium
December 6, 2016
My Acca Scrapbook
Pic 1. Myla
This is my fav inspiration pic for the book’s heroine, Myla. She’s a part demon girl who fights evil souls in Purgatory’s arena. Her irises glow red when her demonic side is active.
Pic 2. Lincoln
Lincoln is a part-angel prince and Myla’s main man. Classic inspiration pic below.
Pic 3. Antrum
Lincoln lives underground on Earth in a place called Antrum. His people are divided up into different houses. One of those houses, ACCA, are a pack of dickheads. Hence the book
December 1, 2016
My Fav Quotes from ACCA!
BONUS: ACCA preorders are now live on Amazon, Kobo, iBooks and B&N!
Like these quotes? You can read a sample chapter from ACCA here!
The post My Fav Quotes from ACCA! appeared first on Monster House Books.
