C. Nzingha Smith's Blog, page 10

Quote of the Week: Proverbs 17:27

Photo Courtesy of Jroota


"A truly wise person uses few words; a person with understanding is even-tempered." ~Proverbs 17:27 




Another way of saying this is, "those who are sure of themselves don't talk all the time. People who stay calm have insight." We have all heard the saying, silence is golden. Living in a world of constant babble it is not only golden, but also a rare commodity. With so many avenues for people to have a platform, they are taking full advantage of their ability to share thoughts, insights, opinions and talents. There is nothing wrong with it except the fact that noise in itself is a distraction. Our society has gotten used to being distracted as a way of life. 




Noise is a pollutant to our minds, our imaginations, our creativity, and our genius. In order to get the light bulb moment, the big idea, the answers to the questions... we only need to be quiet. Everything we need to create wealth and operate in our natural abilities and gifts, we already possess. We miss it though because of the constant noise drowning us out and filling us up with the unimportant. 




One huge part of my creative process, the way I work through various challenges in my career as well as in my life is through silence. I will sit and think, listen, observe my thoughts, feelings and wait. I always have to have a pen and paper handy to capture all the great ideas that come to me when I drown out everything else and focus on hearing my inner self. I am inspired by others, by life, by experience, but my best ideas come from within. I am naturally a silent person. I don't talk a lot. I am an introvert and enjoy the company of silence over people. I am much more comfortable writing then communicating verbally. However, I am learning a balance and also learning how to be mindful of my responsibility to not contribute to the noise. If I don't have anything to say, I don't say anything. I don't talk for the sake of talking. I talk to communicate a point, to evoke a certain reaction/emotion or to share or encourage. It drives my friends and family bananas, my operating in silence. However, I don't feel like I have anything to prove to anyone. I am just learning how to be my most authentic self, this will speak louder than any words that come from my mouth.




I encourage you to spend some time in silence this week. Learn how to be alone and comfortable with yourself. Drown out the noise around you. Also, know you should be comfortable enough in yourself to never have to say anything at all to anyone. Body language, demeanor, and actions are a much more accurate way of showing people who you are and what you are about. No word justifications needed. 





Do you talk over your insecurities? Do you use noise as a distraction from dealing with issues or living on purpose? Are you a person who hates to be in silence? Why? Let me know your thoughts.




~C. NzinghaC. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer and author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal Writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and brand communications consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages.

Quote of the Week- James A. Lafond-Lewis

"The fearless are the people who act in spite of their fear." 

-James A. LaFond-Lewis




Feel the fear and do it anyway. Act in spite of your fear. A lot of what goes on in our heads are but imaginations and there is no way of knowing what the outcome is going to be until we begin to do the very thing it is we are afraid of. Action is the only way you will overcome fear. It is natural to be afraid, to be apprehensive, to want to stop where you are and not take another step toward your destiny. 




We have to find out the basis of our fear. Is it based on a past experience? Or have you let your imagination get the best of the situation and you are sitting still because of what "could" happen? Two totally different situations and most of the time we are standing still and afraid of the unknown. We are being forced to move into areas where we have no idea what is going to happen and what the outcomes are going to be, this causes us to be paralyzed. Protecting yourself from hurt is natural. It is another thing to never have experienced something, but be paralyzed by preconceived notions on what to expect without any evidence of negative. This is the type of fear which will keep you where you don't want to be. 




Faith is the opposite of fear. Being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see. Right now in my faith walk, I am at a point where I have exhausted all my familiar possibilities and am being forced to not only go where I have never been, but to do it in boldness and certainty. The pathway is dark and uncertain, but I have come too far to turn back and the place where I am now, is not a place of comfort. There is no other choice but to keep moving forward. 




Here are a few things I do to help me overcome any fear that arises:



I look at every situation as an opportunity 
I realize I have nothing to lose in trying
I believe people are going to be willing to help me 
I anticipate the best outcome first and give myself permission to fail
I realize I am in control of my reactions and reject all negative feelings as they arise

This has taken some anxiety out of acting in spite of the fear. Many people who know me are shocked to hear me speak about being afraid or fearful because don't let the fear stop me, I do it anyway. This is the difference. Even though I am scared and have no idea what the outcome will be, I know the only way I will find out the definite outcome is to act and see what happens. Afterwards I can adjust, change or try something else and as soon as I decide to act in spite of the fear, the fear no longer controls me. Then I realized there was nothing to be afraid of after all.






What things are you afraid of? Have you tried them yet to find out if you have anything to be afraid of? How have you overcome some past fears? Let me know your thoughts.




~C. Nzingha

C. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer and author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal Writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and brand communications consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages.

Quote of the Week- C. Nzingha Smith

"A response for all the naysayers...All is well." 


It's amazing how some people will pop back up in your life whom you might not have heard from for quite some time. They'll call all of a sudden because "you've been on their mind" and they "wanted to check in to see how things are going" with you. Well, we haven't spoken in six months, does it really matter at this point? My thoughts after I hear the message, but nonetheless, you never know what has been going on with them, so you make an excuse for their lack of communication skills and give them the benefit of the doubt. Unassuming you ring them back and they don't have much to share with you, but they always want you to divulge every detail of what you have going on in your life. I used to play into this until recently, when I realized this was meant to trip me up.



When you are in a zone and you are aggressively pushing forward to reach your goals, a lot of times you don't know how things are going to work out, you just know they are. You are walking in faith and what you are experiencing is beyond explanation, you don't have any of the details, you just have a conviction that in the end everything will work out how it is supposed to. Well, when you fall in the trap of "catching up" sometimes it is an opportunity for doubt to arise and throw you off of your path. When you are giving people "progress reports" on your life (as if you need to justify anything to anyone) you set yourself up for discouragement in two ways. First, depending on who you are speaking to, they might not have the capacity to see the vision or dream and will speak doubt and death to and about it. Secondly, since you can't really explain what is going on in detail as you are speaking you will come off to them and yourself like you have no real clue and will begin to doubt what you are doing and might become discouraged.



Starting today, here is a great response for all of those people who like to come around and get status reports and updates on your life, simply respond, "all is well." Period. Some people will be able to handle it and can go on with the conversation. Others, not so much. See how quick they are to get off the phone with you when that's all you are willing to share. There will be a pause, they will realize you are done, they will probe a bit more, then they will find a way to end the conversation. Don't open yourself up to be vulnerable for attack. Protect your dreams and realize everyone is not able to celebrate your accomplishments with you and this is great because you can always choose to celebrate yourself. Keep reminding yourself "all is well" and despite the obstacles that come your way on the journey to your destiny, you are sure to overcome them all. Put everything in right perspective and remember to speak life.



Do you look for others to cosign on your plans? Does this help or hinder your progress? Let me know your thoughts.



~C. NzinghaC. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer and author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal Writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and brand communications consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.

Footnotes | Los Angeles | March 13, 2012

Join us for an evening of critical commentary from 

Authors | Publishers | Writers featuring:




Author C. Nzingha Smith 

Publisher | Editorial Director, A. Lenise

Author Phyllis "Serene" Rawley




Footnotes is a creative discussion forum where established 

writers| authors |publishers dialogue with emerging talent to offer insight and resources in an open, informal, relaxed and inviting setting. 

Get your questions answered, insight on how to break into specific markets, network and more with industry experts!








When:
Tuesday March 13, 2012

Time:6:30pm-8:30pm

Cash
Bar/Menu








*Advanced RSVP & ticket purchase required to attend. 

No tickets will be sold at the door.






To RSVP & Purchase Tickets Visit: http://www.snc2ink.com/events.aspx 
C. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer and author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal Writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and brand communications consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.

Quote of the Week-Author Unknown

"The biggest drain on life is standing on the fence."




All life is an experiment. I am not sure why as we get older, people feel like it is illegal to change your mind. Change is the only constant thing we have to depend on in life. Change and death. Everything changes at one point or another. One thing doesn't work, try something else. Keep trying until you find the things that fits you best in your current stage of life. This type of mindset is totally opposite of what we are taught throughout childhood and into adulthood. We are taught to pick one thing and stick with it. When you change activities, majors in college, hairstyles, too often, you are told something is wrong with you, you are unstable, or wishy-washy, bipolar even. All negative things and frowned upon. But, how on earth are you supposed to make a decision on anything if you don't first try it to see if it works for you?



Newsflash,  there is nothing wrong with needing to change or taking steps to change your life for the better. Experimenting and experiencing life is the only way to know what works for you. The worst feeling is when your energy is split and you are warring within yourself and allowing fear to paralyze action. The stress is lifted as soon as you decide. You don't even have to begin the change process immediately, the decision to begin is the first step. Before anything can be changed in your life, you have to first make the conscious decision to change it. 




Make a decision. Wow, wasn't that easy? Don't you feel lighter, refreshed and instantly more at ease. Stick with the decision and give it a fair shot. Now for the good news...you are free to make another decision to adjust accordingly or change as often as you like. You are the boss of you. Stop living your life in misery for the sake of other people's comfort levels. It's draining and you will remain unfulfilled. Decide then act. Live on purpose.



Do you find it hard to make decisions in life? What is holding you back from making changes for the better?



~C. NzinghaC. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer and author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal Writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and brand communications consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.

Quote of the Week- C. Nzingha Smith

"Don't let the temporary feelings of today, get in the way of your successful tomorrow." C. Nzingha



"Success requires emotional maturity." -Unknown Author








Age and maturity are not equals. As a child I wished I could be like Peter Pan and never grow up. I really thought adults were stupid and that children had more common sense. Therefore it was more appealing in my mind to remain a child. Then, I finally realized there was no escaping it, with each year I grew older and knew one day I would become an adult. I quickly changed my prayer, I began praying for wisdom and common sense so I wouldn't grow up to be a stupid adult. With age is supposed to come wisdom, but not everyone finds it in life or in business. It is something you have to work at and consciously seek out.



So what does being mature have to do with success? A bunch. How you handle rejection, how you communicate, your temperament all translate over into your business. Emotional control over the small moments of every day determines how successful you will be in the long run. Now that I am an adult, I realized it wasn't stupidity I witnessed from older people as a child, it was a lack of maturity. They aged, but didn't grow in wisdom and so there actions, decision making skills, reactions to disappointments and the ways they communicated didn't match up with where they were in life.



Unfortunately, I still know extra-grown adults right now who throw temper tantrums, do not know how to communicate, show love or express themselves.

How you react to failures, to pressure, to negative feedback and criticism can probably be traced back to when you were a child. The patterns will remain the same as you age if you don't work at improving and growing in maturity. To be a success in life and in business there has to be maturity present, so you are able to operate in wisdom and know how to keep pushing past the bumps in the road, to not get easily distracted and ultimately not quit. The decisions you make everyday determine where you will be years from now. Will you be broke or will you reach wealth? Being ruled by your emotions is a recipe for disaster. You will not be able to blame anyone else but yourself.



This week I challenge you to stop blaming others for where you are today, stop making excuses for why you haven't made it to where you are supposed to be, stop justifying giving up prematurely and stop choosing mediocrity. Instead, face it. Look at it, have a stare off contest, talk to it, take responsibility for the part you played, get control back and finally forgive it, him, her or you. Now...move forward. Grow Up. It's time. You are more than enough, adequate, wonderful and bearing gifts and talents you need to share with the world (in case you needed the reminder). Go after it. People are waiting for you! However, it requires you to pursue, it won't just come to you and it is definitely not easy.



Don't let the temporary feelings of today, get in the way of your success tomorrow. Keep making progress. Are you ruled by your emotions? Let me know your thoughts!



~C. NzinghaC. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer and author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal Writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and brand communications consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.

Quote of the Week -Duane Michals

"I believe in the imagination. 

What I cannot see is infinitely more important than what I can see." 

-Duane Michals







Practice Seeing. Not with your eyes, but with your mind. Take a moment this week and exercise your imagination. Focus in on the possibilities, not on your reality. Close your eyes and envision yourself living in your dream house, vacationing on a beautiful island, accepting the award for a praised accomplishment, driving in your dream car. How does it feel? What is going on around you? What are you wearing? When you add the details it makes it more real and you are able to get a clearer picture of how it will feel when you get there. Being able to see yourself as you want to be is as important as preparing to get there. If you are not able to see it in your mind first, the likelihood you will get there is slim. 




As we get older and have more responsibilities, the simple pleasure of taking the time out of our hectic days and busy schedules to daydream and imagine ourselves outside of our current circumstances becomes almost impossible. However, if you think about it for a moment, where you are right now in life comes out of a previous thought, vision or dream. When you were younger, you saw yourself exactly as you wanted to be when you grew up. You knew what you would do, where you would live, what kind of car you would drive and so on because you imagined it as if it were real then.




I attended an event over the summer, where former NFL great Isaac Bruce spoke on the importance of practicing seeing. He told a story of how when he was younger he would catch a football, make a touch down, do a victory dance all as if he was already playing in the NFL. So when he made it to the NFL, it wasn't new, it was him living what he already saw and practiced so many times before, first in his mind. He practiced in the mirror for interviews and award speeches way before he was in a position to receive the opportunity.




His speech was beyond inspiring and now I have adopted some of those habits myself. I practice the way I envision my name being called on a talk show when they introduce me for an interview. I practice the acceptance speech for winning my first NAACP Image Award, I practice seeing myself as I envision me in the future. I might not be there yet, but when I get there, it will be natural because I have been there so many times before in my mind. It takes the anxiety and nervousness out of it and makes me feel as if I belong there. One step at a time and one well completed book at a time, but the time will come because I am able to see myself there already.




Resources: http://lifebydesign.hubpages.com/hub/Visualization---I-cant-visualize--How-can-I-learn_1 




How often do you take the time to practice seeing yourself as you want to be, where you want to be? Have you lost your imagination or ability to dream? Let me know your thoughts!




~C. NzinghaC. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer an author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and pr consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.

Quote of the Week- Joyce Meyer

"We need a love revolution. Love must be more than a theory or a word; it has to be action. It must be seen and felt." Joyce Meyer




Love is a state of being. We have to go back to the original essence of why we were created, to love and to be loved. Our quote this week comes from Joyce Meyer's book, "The Love Revolution." I am only a few pages into the first chapter, but this quote hit home and spoke volumes of my personal beliefs. I thought to myself, this is exactly right and I have to join the revolution. I am old fashion. I still believe, love changes things, not just using the word, but showing love and being love. We have to act in love. We need to be walking, talking, breathing physical interpretations of love. When people feel loved it makes a positive difference in their lives, in their relationships in how they feel about themselves and how they function in our society. The current state of the world is the result of a lack of love. As the image above illustrates, we all have a hand in creating a better world for ourselves and our children and we each have control over ourselves and how we treat ourselves and others.




I admit, I am a hopeless romantic and my favorite topic to read and write about is love. I aspire to live a life of love. Majority of my poetry is about love, my first book, Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation is a cookbook for couples and lovers to reignite their love and passion for each other and to relearn how to show each other love through cooking. Love has to become a way of life for all of us. If we can achieve a life of living and acting in love, then there will be a dynamic impact on the world we live in. Yesterday, for us being so self consumed and selfish that we can't stop and show our love and support for our neighbor, friend and brother. People who feel loved, show love and consider themselves valuable. Love doesn't cost anything. It just takes us to pause a second and realize someone else's hurt and pain and instead of turning a blind eye to it, we stop and help. Think about it with your heart instead of your mind. 




On my quest to join the Love Revolution and really committing to living a life in love, I'm introducing the Uber Lovelution on February 1st! For 29 days I will be rewarding those who join the Lovelution with prizes, giveaways and other goodies, recognizing 'lovelies' publicly for showing love openly and freely. There will also be tips, ideas and ways you can show love to others in your family, neighborhood and on your job, in the community and throughout the country and the world. Everyday between this blog, my Facebook and Twitter pages there will be something posted educating you on a subject you know so well, but may be a bit out of practice on. Love. It is more than a four letter word, it is a command and a verb. Love. Be love. Show love. Give love. Contribute to a better world by acting in love.




Please share ways you show others love everyday. Whether it is a smile, hug, song, meal, laugh, help me add to the list of ways to show love to others. Our list should be endless and infinite as we should never run out of ways to love.




~C. NzinghaC. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer an author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and pr consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.

Quote of the Week- Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you can't see the whole staircase." 

-Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.







This quote sums up my life right now. I'm in uncharted territory, knowing I'm too far in to turn back and there is no other choice but to keep going forward and to trust God. A silhouette of the staircase is not even remotely visible. Even before I had a name for it, I have always attested my success in life thus far to my ability to step out on faith. Believing God for the impossible and being sure of what I hoped for and certain of what I did not see. Easier said than done.




Everyday almost I question my decision, I look at where I am and the journey ahead and work through sleepless nights because faith without works is dead. You have to put in the work to reap any kind of rewards. There is no such things as an overnight success or immediate gratification and you have no clue as to when your time will actually come. There is a time and season for everything and you have to prepare for it in advance before you can reach it. 




Wherever you are in your faith walk, I encourage you to continue to trust in God and know He is in control and has you covered. Regardless of the circumstances and how it may look. I can say this because as I type I am encouraging myself as well. Keep pressing forward. You can make it only if you don't quit in the process. As the celebrations abounded this week and last in remembrance of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and all he did, it reminds me to keep pressing and how much more I need to work as it pales in comparison to the sacrifices others had to make in order for me to enjoy the luxury of living my life in freedom. There is still work to be done...and we all have a part to play. 




Everyday you have to keep inching towards your goals, one step at a time, one task at a time. You don't have to know the outcome. You have to have the courage to walk in the direction of the outcome. Keep your faith and hope and dreams alive. Someone else might be looking at you to encourage them to dream. When I need to remind myself, I say this..."All is well with you, God has already fixed it, trust Him." Feel free to use that as often as you need to. Encourage yourself and others as we all need to stay the course and live our lives on purpose. 




What do you do in your faith walk to keep yourself encouraged? Please share, I would love to add a few new techniques to my list!




~C. Nzingha







C. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer an author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and pr consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.

An Unanswered Prayer- Poem

An Unanswered Prayer




You say I'm the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with...

Do you even know who I am?

I am an unanswered prayer.

I ask you one qualifying question... Have you prayed for me?

When you go to God to inquire about me, you have considered me in advance,

you're prepared for me and have detailed instructions on how I operate,

I will not be a stranger because God will reveal to you my heart.

When you pray for me, it shows you have your own intimate relationship with God, and when I break down, you will not go to friends and family,

but you will go back to my creator for a look at the owner's manual.

When you've prayed for me it means God has searched your heart,

taking you through a rigorous screening process that you must pass,

first asking His permission to court me as I am his daughter, precious in His sight.

When you have prayed for me, it will be God who gets my attention because I won't notice you as I am busy doing His work.

When you have prayed for me, I can trust and follow you where you lead, submissive and obedient because God has given you instructions for our union in advance.

So even though I look as if I am the woman to spend the rest of your life with,

when you pray for me God will give you wisdom & discernment to know if truly I am indeed your Eve.

Only God knows what's best for you and Adam didn't search for Eve, God provided Eve to Adam because He knew his needs.

So again, I ask you...have you prayed for me?

If the answer is no.

Please note: I am way out of your league.

I can not become someone's obligation,

a good for now, or a good enough,

I can not be your compulsive decision,

your lukewarm fantasy,

or a flashy object you take out for special occasions to show off to your friends and colleagues.

While I appreciate the flattery, please just let me be,

for someone has taken the time to get to know me in my spirit being,

he has been specific as it pertains to the qualities which make up me,

my love is what will complete him,

and he will be the physical interpretation of God's love for me,

he will know my value and I will be a precious gift from God in his sight.

So excuse me while I wait patiently, praying for him as he prays for me,

to be delivered in God's timing as a miracle specific to his unanswered prayer.




~C. Nzingha


C. Nzingha Smith is a publisher/writer an author of Lust Have Recipes: IN-Gredients for Stimulation a cookbook featuring aphrodisiac recipes, poetry and imagery. Smith is also the Founder/ Principal writer at SNC2 INK, The Business of Writing. SNC2 INK writing agency provides writing, editing and pr consulting to creative entrepreneurs and businesses at the start-up and growth stages. Connect with her at www.cnsmithbooks.com or www.snc2ink.com.