Denise Duffield-Thomas's Blog, page 6

Denise on the Rich Woman Rising Podcast

In this honest and heart-expanding conversation, I sat down with Eloise Tomkins to unpack a big one: why money and success alone won’t save you from scarcity—and what it really takes to feel safe with abundance.

We explored how our childhood experiences shape the way we show up in business, and I shared parts of my own money story—from growing up in housing commission to navigating generational money wounds. It’s been a journey of healing, unlearning, and choosing ease over hustle (again and again).

We also talked about how overworking, hoarding, and people-pleasing are often nervous system responses, not personality flaws—and why true financial freedom isn’t a finish line, but the doorway to even deeper emotional and mindset work.

If money still feels “hard,” even when it’s technically flowing, you’re not broken. This episode is a compassionate reminder that feeling safe with abundance is a practice—and one you absolutely deserve to embody.

We explored:

How childhood shapes your money patterns

Why overworking and people-pleasing are trauma responses

Feeling safe with abundance (even when it’s already “enough”)

The emotional work after financial freedom

Breaking free from scarcity and choosing ease

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Denise on The Goddess Unleashed Podcast

I had such a beautiful, soul-nourishing chat with Naz Spurrier on The Goddess Unleashed Podcast—what an empowering conversation!

We went deep into what it really means to create success on your own terms, especially if you’re someone (like me!) who’s a highly sensitive introvert. I opened up about my journey with imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and how I’ve built a thriving business that supports my energy, my lifestyle, and my values—without the burnout.

Naz and I talked about the rituals I use to prep for being “seen” in my business, how I protect my peace with strong boundaries, and why we all need to redefine what “hard work” means—because success doesn’t have to come through struggle or sacrifice.

If you’ve ever felt like you need to do more or be more to be worthy of wealth, this episode is a gentle reminder that ease, self-compassion, and alignment are powerful strategies too.

We covered:

Releasing perfectionism and pressure

Embracing ease and softness in business

Wealth and worthiness as a woman

Navigating visibility as a sensitive soul

Creating success that aligns with you

This one’s for you if you’re done with hustle culture and ready to manifest success on your own terms.

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Refunds, Defaults, and the Reality of Running a Business with Boundaries

Running a heart-centered business doesn’t mean you’ll never face tough money conversations. In fact, the bigger your business grows, the more likely you’ll need to handle refunds, default payments, and awkward client situations. But here’s the thing: these aren’t signs that you’re failing—they’re signs you’re in business.

Let’s walk you through the reality of these sticky moments. Because they’re not just occasional blips—they’re rites of passage that every entrepreneur faces. And with a few tweaks to your systems and mindset, they don’t have to take you down.

Refunds: When to Give Them, When to Say No

There’s no one-size-fits-all rule about refunds. Sometimes, giving a refund is the easiest way to protect your energy. Other times, it’s important to stand firm on your terms.

In the early days of my business, I offered a 60-day money-back guarantee. It felt generous. It felt fair. But then one year, a big launch coincided with the holidays. Christmas Eve, in fact. And suddenly, a wave of refund requests came through—not because people were unhappy, but because they saw an opportunity. They’d attended every live call, downloaded everything, got coached… and then just decided to claim their money back.

That was my turning point.

Since then, I’ve shortened refund windows, drip-fed bonuses, and made it very clear what people get and when. My general rule now? If someone hasn’t had access to everything and it’s early on, within the refund period, I’m happy to refund. But if they’ve clearly participated and used the material, I’m not here to be scammed.

Here are some tips that might help:

Be super clear in your terms and conditions. How long do they have to request a refund? What disqualifies them?


Drip-feed content. Don’t give everything upfront if you offer a refund window.


Don’t let fear of a bad review push you around. Bullies usually don’t want their behavior publicized.

And remember: you’re allowed to be kind and firm at the same time.

Payment Defaults: Why They Happen and How to Handle Them

Let’s talk payment plans—because they can be amazing for sales, but they also come with headaches.

As your business grows, you will see an increase in defaulted payments. I’ve noticed patterns tied to economic events—interest rate hikes, inflation, and even regional trends. When times get tough, defaults go up. That’s just business.

Some tips if you’re offering payment plans:

Don’t do it out of guilt. If you’re offering them because you feel bad people can’t afford your prices, make sure you also have the systems and boundaries in place to manage the fall-out.


Automate everything. Use tools that send reminders, auto-retry cards, and manage follow-ups. You can even set reminders in software like Xero.


Charge admin fees if needed. These reflect the extra time and support involved. Just check the laws in your area first.


Consider pre-event payments. For retreats or events, offer plans that finish before the service is delivered.

And the truth is, some defaults are just human. People lose cards, forget, or get hacked. Others are avoidable. Either way, it doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong.

Mindset Shifts That Make It All Easier

Money stuff brings up a lot—from fear of being disliked to imposter syndrome. But your boundaries aren’t mean. They’re necessary.

One of my mentors, Kendall Summerhawk, said something that stuck with me:

“Asking for money should feel as neutral as saying ‘Please pass the salt.’”

That’s what we’re aiming for. Neutral, confident, and clear.

You don’t have to justify yourself. You don’t have to carry everyone else’s stuff. And you definitely don’t have to apologize for being paid for your work.

Bonus Tips for Reducing Refunds and Defaults

💡 Add an “early pay-off” offer. After a few months of a payment plan, offer to waive admin fees if they pay it off in full. It’s great for them and saves you admin later.
💡 Use fake assistants. Seriously. “Dave from accounts” can chase payments while you stay in your zone of genius.
💡 Tighten up your T&Cs regularly. If something’s been unclear or abused, fix it right away.
💡 Be kind—but not at your own expense. You can be empathetic without being exploited.

You Deserve to Get Paid

Ultimately, you’re allowed to ask for your money. You’re allowed to protect your energy, time, and income. And yes—you’re allowed to say no.

These moments aren’t business failures. They’re proof you’re growing. And when they come up, instead of spiraling, just remind yourself: this is normal. You’re not alone. And you’ve got options.

You’re doing great.

🎧 Listen to the full episode of Chill & Prosper here

Refunds, Defaults and Tricky Money Conversations

EPISODE 214
Refunds, defaults and tricky money conversations

 

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Ever had someone demand a refund out of the blue? Or had a client just… stop paying?

This week on Chill & Prosper, we’re diving into the messy middle of running a business—those awkward money convos we all face eventually. 

I’m answering questions about refunds, payment defaults, and how to protect your boundaries without losing your mind (or your income).

Here’s what we cover:
✨ When to stand your ground vs. give the refund
✨ How to handle clients who default on payment plans
✨ Ways to automate, protect yourself, and still stay human
✨ The sneaky mindset blocks that make money convos harder than they need to be

You don’t have to be a robot—or a pushover. You’re allowed to run your business your way, and yes, you’re allowed to ask for your money.

Denise on the Dance Mama Podcast

I had so much fun joining Lucy McCrudden on the Dance Mama podcast—what a treat to talk about two of my greatest loves: dance and money mindset!

As someone who grew up dancing (and still pulls on a leotard whenever I can!), I loved the chance to chat about how dance has shaped my life—not just physically, but mentally, emotionally, and even in business. These days, alongside running my business and raising three kids, I still fly the flag for ballet and proudly invest in creative projects like The Book Thief Musical. 

In this episode, Lucy and I dive into the money blocks that so many dancers and creatives face—especially around pricing, self-worth, and charging for your talents. I shared some of the mindset shifts that can really help dancers (and anyone in the arts, really) move from scarcity to abundance.

We also talked about the joy of returning to dance recreationally as a busy working mum, and why it's never too late to reconnect with your body and your creativity. We touched on everything from representation of older women in dance to how we can better care for ourselves mentally and physically—so we can keep dancing for as long as we want.

Whether you're a professional dancer, a studio owner, or someone who hasn’t danced in years but still feels the pull—this conversation is full of encouragement, inspiration, and permission to claim joy, wealth, and movement in whatever way works for you.

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Denise on the Doubt-Less, Do More Podcast

I was recently on the Doubt~less Do More Podcast, chatting with host Trudy Simmons about our experiences with self-doubt, overcoming challenges, and building confidence in business.

We explored various strategies for personal growth and success, including self-compassion, goal setting, and creating a positive mindset. The conversation concluded with encouragement to embrace one's potential and pursue goals with confidence, regardless of external circumstances.

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Win or bust? How to celebrate or change your money goals

EPISODE 213
Win or bust? How to celebrate or change your money goals

 

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I hope that you get to experience the boss feeling of achieving a long-held goal. 

Hitting a big money goal, buying the dream house, taking the holiday… you deserve to make your dreams happen and then celebrate wildly. 

But what if you work super hard, achieve a dream, then change your mind?

Is that something we’re even allowed to do? I made my bed, now I have to lie in it… 

On today’s podcast I talk about achieving then releasing big goals as well as how I celebrate big wins in my business. 

You'll learn how goals can evolve and why it's okay to change your mind about what you want.

I also answer questions on pricing, gratitude and jealousy. Juicy. 

This episode is packed with practical advice and mindset shifts that will transform how you approach your business. 

Honestly, there are no rules. Give yourself permission to dream big, or permission to simply let go of a dream and choose again.  

xx Denise

P.S. My annual business coaching program will be opening soon.

This is your opportunity to work with me and your team ON transforming your business. 

… Business strategy, marketing and passive income; I’m going to help you maximize simplicity and profit. 

Click here to let me know where you most need help right now and be amongst the first to hear about how to work with me.

Avoiding the Family Money Trap: How to Maintain Healthy Financial Boundaries

Money can be a touchy subject, especially when it comes to family. Whether it's dealing with financially irresponsible parents or navigating money conversations with your partner, setting healthy boundaries is crucial for maintaining positive relationships and your own financial well-being.

The Weight of Financial Responsibility

Many of us have found ourselves in situations where we feel responsible for our family members' financial situations. It's a common struggle, particularly for those who've achieved financial success or stability. We may feel guilty about our own prosperity or feel obligated to "fix" our loved ones' money problems, I know I have. 

But here's the truth: you're not responsible for anyone else's financial choices or circumstances.

Recognizing Unhealthy Patterns

Often, our desire to help comes from a good place. We want to see our loved ones thrive and be free from financial stress. However, constantly bailing out family members or taking on their financial burdens can create unhealthy dynamics:

It can enable irresponsible behavior
It may strain your own financial health
It can lead to resentment and damage relationships
It prevents others from learning valuable financial lessons

Setting Healthy Financial Boundaries

Establishing clear boundaries around money with family members is essential for maintaining healthy relationships and your own financial well-being. Here are some strategies to help you set and maintain these boundaries:

1. Communicate Clearly and Compassionately

When discussing financial boundaries with family, approach the conversation with empathy and clarity. Express your concerns and limitations without judgment. For example, you might say, "I care about you and want to support you, but I'm not able to provide financial assistance right now."

2. Offer Alternative Support

Instead of providing direct financial assistance, consider other ways you can support your family members:

Help them create a budget
Share resources for financial education
Offer emotional support during tough times

3. Learn to Say No

It's okay to say no to financial requests. Practice phrases like, "I'm not comfortable with that" or "That doesn't work for me." Remember, saying no to financial requests doesn't mean you don't care about your family.

4. Establish Clear Expectations

If you do decide to provide financial assistance, set clear terms and expectations. Treat it like a business transaction with agreed-upon repayment terms or conditions.

Dealing with Guilt and Emotional Manipulation

Setting financial boundaries can bring up feelings of guilt, especially if family members react negatively. Remember that it's not selfish to prioritize your own financial health and well-being.

Be aware of emotional manipulation tactics, such as guilt-tripping or playing the victim. Stand firm in your boundaries, even when it's uncomfortable.

Aligning Money Mindsets with Your Partner

When it comes to romantic partnerships, aligning your money mindsets is crucial for a harmonious relationship. Here are some tips:

1. Have Open Conversations

Regularly discuss your financial goals, fears, and experiences with your partner. Be curious about their money background and perspective.

2. Create Shared Financial Goals

Work together to establish common financial objectives. This can help you both feel invested in your shared financial future.

3. Respect Individual Differences

Recognize that you and your partner may have different money personalities or spending habits. Find ways to compromise and respect each other's approaches to money.

4. Seek Professional Help if Needed

If you're struggling to align your money mindsets, consider working with a financial therapist or coach who can help mediate and provide tools for better financial communication.

Remember: Your Financial Journey is Your Own

At the end of the day, your financial journey is uniquely yours. While it's natural to want to help family members, it's crucial to prioritize your own financial health and well-being. By setting clear boundaries and fostering open communication about money, you can maintain healthy relationships while staying true to your financial goals and values.

Setting healthy financial boundaries with family isn't always easy, but it's an essential part of maintaining both your financial health and your relationships. Remember, it's not selfish to prioritize your own financial well-being – it's necessary for long-term stability and the ability to truly help others when appropriate.

Message me on socials @denisedt if you have more questions or a particular win to share about setting boundaries with your families.

For more, these articles will help:

How to Protect Your Money Mindset from Negative Friends and Family
3 Steps to Stop People Pleasing and Create Better Boundaries
Raising kids with a healthy money mindset

xx Denise

FREE BONUS: Mastering Awkward Money Conversations

Are you tired of feeling uncomfortable during money conversations?

Whether you’re chasing up payments, raising your prices, or setting boundaries, these discussions can be downright awkward.

But don’t worry—I’ve got your back!

I’m excited to share my FREE ebook, "Awkward Money Conversations Made Easy," designed specifically for entrepreneurs like you.

Inside, you’ll find practical tips and strategies to help you navigate those tough conversations with confidence.

No more second-guessing or avoiding discussions about money!

Visit denisedt.com/awkward to download your FREE copy today and start transforming those awkward moments into empowering conversations.

Let’s make money talk easy together!

Avoiding the family money trap and setting healthy financial boundaries.

EPISODE 212
Avoiding the family money trap and setting healthy financial boundaries

 

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Money can be a touchy subject, especially when it comes to family. 

Whether it's dealing with financially irresponsible parents or navigating money conversations with our partners, setting healthy boundaries is crucial for maintaining positive relationships and our own financial well-being.

If you’ve ever struggled with family money issues or felt financially responsible for others, today’s episode is for you. It’s a candid one, where I open up about my personal experiences with family finances and share insights on setting healthy boundaries.

Tune in to learn about;

Navigating Family Financial Dynamics

The weight of feeling responsible for others' financial situations
How childhood experiences shape our money mindset
Practical tips for setting boundaries with family members

Energetic Cord-Cutting

Visualizing and releasing energetic ties to others' money issues
Techniques to protect your own financial energy
The importance of "right-sizing" relationships

Partner Money Mindset

Strategies for aligning financial goals with your significant other
Communicating effectively about money in relationships
Understanding and respecting different money archetypes

I also address a listener question about bringing partners along on the entrepreneurial journey, offering practical advice for couples navigating business and finances together.

Remember, you're not responsible for solving everyone's money problems. Focus on your own financial growth while maintaining compassion for others.

Curious to learn more about setting healthy financial boundaries? Listen now.

 

xx Denise

Denise on the Ready, Set, Paid Ads Podcast

I had such a great time chatting with Mary-Anne Amies, host of Ready Set, Paid Ads, about how our money beliefs can influence the way we market ourselves—and how to shift those stories so business can feel easier and more abundant. For years, I avoided paid ads because I thought I had to “earn” every dollar through sheer effort. Now? I see advertising as a tool that supports freedom, not something to feel guilty about.

We also explored how old money memories—passed down through culture, family, or early experiences—can show up as resistance in our business decisions. If you’ve ever hesitated to invest in yourself, raise your prices, or show up more visibly, you’re not alone. These things aren’t just strategy—they’re mindset.

Here’s what we talked about:

How “sweat equity” beliefs kept me from using paid ads

The shift that helped me embrace advertising as support, not shame

Cultural and family money blocks that affect visibility and pricing

The role of AI in making marketing easier

Why diversification in marketing is essential for sustainability

The sweet spot where mindset and marketing work hand-in-hand

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