Jennifer L. Armentrout's Blog, page 27

Okay. Wow.

I really don’t know how else to announce this other than scream it, because this was a huge accomplishment for me. Something I didn’t know if I’d ever do.

And I’m going to get a little emotional about this. Probably because it’s been an up and down month or so with everything.

I’ve hit bestsellers’ list under my pen name J. Lynn, for my New Adult and Adult stuff, which is also very awesome, and I’ve hit USA Today Bestseller’s list under my real name for two Young Adult books. But I’ve never hit New York Times for Young Adult or under my real name. It’s a hard list to crack. A very hard list. And I’ve come close, but it was always me like this to NYTimes YA list:

And NYTimes YA list was always like:

Until today.

Oh my God, pardon me while I SCREAM. White Hot Kiss, the book that sat for like TWO years while we decided what to do with it, hit the mother friggin’ New York Times’ Young Adult bestseller’s list at number 10.

Oh gosh, when I got the phone call, I was pretty emotional. That might sound cheesy, but this was… well, it’s a big deal for me. Big enough that the pizza I ordered earlier is cold, because I’ve been running around the house like an idiot since about 4pm.

So a big thank you to the team at Harlequin Teen — for Margo (my editor), Natashya (head editor in charge, and please God, I hope I spelled your name right), to T.S. and Annie, to my publicist Lisa Wray and Amy, and every person who got behind the series. Another big thank you my agent Kevan and to K.P. Simmons, and to everyone who worked on this book. Including Damaris for organizing an awesome release party, to Tom Barnes and Kevin Cristiano for building a great Dark Elements website.

And a HUGE thank you to all the readers. Guys, seriously. Ya’ll have made it so that I can continue doing what I love to do as long as I can do it. And none of any of this, not even being able to post funny gifs and sexy pictures of Theo James and have people even look at them on this blog, would be possible without you all.

So. THANK. YOU.

And of course, here’s Theo.

(He’s mad, because he wasn’t the first gif.)

Book News!

I am so, so excited to share some awesome book news with you guys today. Some of you have been asking if there will be more books in the Wait for You series, after Stay With Me comes out in September 2014, and I finally get to tell you that YES, there will be more books in the series!

Here is the official announcement:

NYT and USA Today bestselling author, Jennifer Armentrout’s DREAM OF YOU, COME WITH ME and FIRE IN YOU, in the continuing series that began with the #1 NYT bestselling novel, WAIT FOR YOU, to Tessa Woodward at William Morrow, in a major deal, for publication in April 2015, by Kevan Lyon at Marsal Lyon Literary Agency (World English).
Foreign: Taryn Fagerness Agency

I am so excited about this! Not only do I continue to share Cam and Avery, Jase and Teresa with you guys, but I get to introduce you to more characters in the world and more swoony guys.



The first book, DREAM OF YOU, has an unexpected release date of April 2015 and will focus on two characters you will meet in STAY WITH ME, plus you’ll get to see something very special go down between Cam and Avery.

I’m so thrilled to continue working with Tessa Woodward and the awesome team at HarperCollins/ William Morrow. Big squishy hugs to Kevan Lyon for being the spectacular agent that she is, and even more squishy hugs to every one of you. The readers. Without you, there will be no more book deals, no more new characters.

And I’m going to thank you the best way I know how. With a picture of Theo James.

White Hot Kiss is out Today!

It’s finally here! White Hot Kiss is out today. And this has been something I’ve been waiting for over three years. I finished writing White Hot Kiss in January 2011 (at that time it was called Crave) and I ended up shelving the book as other projections came down the pipeline (Unchained, the Lux Series, etc.), but Roth, Layla, and Zayne were always in the back of my mind. So when I signed on with HQN Teen last Feb, roughly a year ago, I knew I was finally going to be able to share their story.

And here they are!

Amazon

B&N

Apple

Don’t forget, the print versions have a special Roth POV in the back, and you can find the print wherever books are sold.

I have some release day fun for you!

Check out the dedication Dark Elements Website with tons of cool stuff by going to thedarkelementsseries.com

Meet Roth.

To help celebrate Roth and White Hot Kiss, I have a super mega giveaway for you. The giveaway winner from last week is Haley Hawks.  You have an email waiting for you. Congrats!

Signed copies:

White Hot Kiss

Hero

Allure

Ascendant

Spirit

Storm

The Vicious Deep

Contaminated

Unsigned copies:

Waterfell

Undelible

The Secret Diamond Sisters

Ink

Alice in Zombieland

Pawn

Plus:

$25 iTunes Gift Card

Tons of swag (bookmarks and fan art)

Contest is international Winner has 4 days to claim prize. Author is not responsible for lost packages, etc.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Eyeballs are Crazy

Okay. My blog is usually a place for stupid stuff, random and rare rants, and tons of contests, and I almost always avoid getting personal about things, because sometimes it feels weird to just open up and talk about something while doing so on the Internet. It kind of makes me feel like this.

And I’m not even sure why I’m choosing to talk about this now. Maybe it’s because I haven’t fully wrapped my head around it. Or really, seriously sat down and thought about it and what it really, truly means. (I’m loving the adverbs right now)

So here’s my story about eyeballs.

About two years ago, my dad went to the eye doctor and he was diagnosed with a form of Macular degeneration– in other words, a progressive loss of sight, and many forms of macular degeneration are hereditary. So all the kids needed to get tested. I did. Results came back negative.  And I was like…

Dodged that bullet.

I mean, I’ve always had crappy eyesight. I’m near sighted AND far sighted, but I can see without glasses and with glasses, even though I’m supposed to be wearing glasses all the time. So all is good in the hood.

Then I decided at the end of last year, I needed new frames. Probably a new prescription too, because the current ones weren’t as good as they used to be. Sometimes my eyes were still get blurry, and my eyes weren’t adapting well when going from dark to light. So about a month or so ago, I went to get new frames and probably a new prescription.

Within about a minute of the eye guy looking at my eyes, he pulled back and asked if anyone in my family had macular degeneration? I said my dad did, but I was tested and I was negative, so can I just get some new frames?

I got new frames.I also got referred to a retina specialist.

Now, I wasn’t really concerned. My dad is like 70 years old, can see to drive and read and all that good stuff. The worse case scenario was losing my sight when I got older or having to have eyeball injections, which is super frightening to even consider, but doable. Maybe surgery, but still the macular degeneration I thought my dad had wasn’t that big of a deal. At least not something I needed to seriously worry about right now. But I did go to the retina specialist

And I was like…

To the special eye doctor person.

And he was kind of like…

Okay. He wasn’t like that. He was actually pretty nice. So was the doctor who nearly blinded me for half of the day and probably wanted to throat punch me because he had to HOLD MY EYES OPEN FOR ME.

Anyways, testing for macular degeneration sucks. It’s not painful. I’m just a wussy and don’t like anything near my eyes, including people, light, fingers, pressure gauges, needles, contacts, air. I’m also currently YELLOW because of the florescent dye. I’m yellow. Seriously.

After I went through all my testing, special eye guy was like “How do you see as well as you do?”

Me: “Um… I cool like that?”

Turns out there’s lots of blood vessels in the eyeball and when they swell, it’s not a good thing. Also turns out I have lots of swelling of blood vessels in my eyeballs, so much so that the special eye guy was like HOW DO YOU NOT FEEL THIS?

But it also turns out that the macular degeneration I thought my dad has wasn’t what I quite possibly have. Or probably most definitely have. Or whatever.

Primary Impressions show I have retinitis pigmentosa with a few other unpronounceable and difficult to spell words added to that. Besides sounding like something that reminds me of bad breath, it’s a pretty serious eye disease that causes severe vision impairment and often blindness.

People with RP  can go legally blind, can loose peripheral vision (tunnel vision), and they also can go completely blind. I’m already losing some of my peripheral vision and I have one more test in March to determine how much, and I guess, where they map the pathology of the disease, and try to determine if it is hereditary or not, and are a 100% sure this is what we are working with. Which they seemed pretty sure.

When I heard this news, my first response was how do we treat this or prolong it? The response was there is no known treatment approved at this time. There is no way to prolong it. And the scary thing is that the later in life you experience the symptoms, the more rapid eye deterioration is. I’m not sure yet if 33 years of age is considered later in life, I’m sure hoping it’s not, but I’m thinking they are comparing it to an infant, so yes, it would be considered later in life.

So I was kind of like, whoa, this sucks. I really would like some Bob Evans for lunch. And I got some Bob Evans for lunch. Took a nap since I was like Gizmo screeching “Bright lights! Bright lights!” and then I got up, and was like hmmm, I might have to take this seriously.

Right now, we’re getting the swelling down with eye drops. If that doesn’t work, there are many ways to get the swelling down. Then I have that other field vision test, and hopefully more information on what to really expect other than the Hail Mary of not going blind.

But it wasn’t until this evening that I was sitting here, putting together a contest, when I suddenly felt this pressure to WRITE. To write EVERY book that’s in my head now because writing is going to be really hard if I don’t have functioning eyeballs. I mean, it’s possible, but I’m sure it’s difficult. But that pressure was seriously paralyzing for a moment, because I was like how WILL I continue to do what I love with deteriorating eye sight, when the glare from the computer becomes too much, or my vision goes into a tunnel that eventually snuffs out? How do you adapt to that? How am I going to continue doing this, something that I seriously love doing and probably a little addicted to doing?

Then I was like holy shit, I wouldn’t be able to see Theo James’ face or the Supernatural boys, and all kinds of other, more important things than writing like reading, driving, seeing things in general, if I go blind.  And I was pretty much like

The crazy thing is I don’t know what will happen. I don’t think anyone really knows what will happen in terms of progression. In reality, I could get really lucky and they tell me after my next appointment that they were wrong. Or I could get lucky and have a couple of more decades of my crappy but effective eye sight. Or I could not be so lucky. I really don’t know, and I guess that’s why I’m writing this post, because I can’t sit and think about it, dwell on it. I can’t focus on it, because that’s not going to change anything. All it’s going to do is waste time. So like with writing a book, getting it out there and putting it out there, you have to let it go at that point. So that’s what I’m doing I suppose. Getting it out and then I have to let it go.

This is me letting it go.

This is also me posting a gratuitous picture of Theo James.

White Hot Kiss teaser and contest!

White Hot Kiss comes out February 25th, just a few days, and I got a teaser for you, I’m also going to show you Zayne (GASP), and I have a huge arse giveaway for you.

Cuz that’s how I roll.

First up, meet Zayne!

Aw, Zayne! I’ll give you a Zayne teaser!

****

          “What’s up, Layla-bug?” he asked.

Part of me loved it when he used my childhood nickname. The other part—the part that wasn’t a little girl anymore—loathed it.  I peeked at him through my lashes. He was fully clothed now. What a shame. “Who’s on the roof?”

He sat beside me. “A few travelers from out of town needed a place to rest. Abbot offered them beds, but they preferred the roof.  They didn’t—” He stopped suddenly, leaning forward, grabbing my leg. “Why are your knees scuffed up?”

My brain sort of shorted out the moment his hand touched my bare leg. A hot flush stole over my cheeks, spreading way, way down. I gazed at his high cheekbones and those lips—oh, God, those lips were perfect. A thousand fantasies blossomed. All of them involved him, me and the ability to kiss him without sucking out his soul.

“Layla, what did you get into tonight?” He dropped my leg.

I shook my head, dispelling those hopeless dreams. “Um…well, nothing.”

Zayne moved closer, staring at me as if he could see through my lies. He had an uncanny ability to do so. But if I told him everything, like the Upper Level demon part, they’d never let me leave the house alone. I liked my freedom. It was about the only thing I had.

***

Contest time!

What’s up for grabs?

Signed copy of White Hot Kiss, Be With Me, Trust In Me, and Sentinel

Indeliable

Ink

Waterfell

The Secret Diamond Sisters

Alice in Zombieland

Crash Into You

Grim

Pawn

AND…

Beautiful Face Lux bookmark designed by Hebel Designs

$15 itunes Gift Card

And tons of unique fan art swag

Contest is Internation

Winner must claim the prize w/in 4 days

Author is not responsible for lost packages.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

White Hot Fun Stuff

Got some fun stuff for you today.

Would you like a signed/personalized copy of White Hot Kiss? This is your last chance to get one. You have until Sunday the 16th to place your order HERE. It’s open internationally, meaning no matter where you live, you can order a signed/personalized copy. Check out the order form for all your details.

 Are you a Demon?

A Human?

Or a Warden?

Find out by taking this White Hot Kiss Personality quiz HERE and post what you are in the comment section below to be entered to win one of 5 COPIES of White Hot Kiss and Be With Me.

All winners must claim their prize within five days

Contest is international

No purchase required

Author is not responsible for lost packages.

Contest ends Monday the 17th at 11:59pm EST

Be With Me Trailer and giveaway!

Ack! Be With Me releases tomorrow!

Amazon

B&N

Apple Books

But today,  Amazon debuted the book trailer for Be With Me on their sites! You can view the trailer HERE and HERE. Make sure you have the volume on, because the song, it brings all the FEELS in the world.

To celebrate the release of Be With Me tomorrow and the reveal of the awesome book trailer produced by Book Candy Studios, I’m holding the big, the epic giveaway

 

22 Books. Yes. 22 signed Books.

Every single book you see there is signed by the author. Every. Single. One.

Not only that, you can also win a journal signed by several authors, plus signed swag and giveaways.

(Click on the photo to see a larger image for the all the books)

Contest is international. Winner has 7 days to claim the prize.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Updates and Reminders

It’s the boring old updates and reminders time. Okay. It might be boring for me to write, because I’ve written the words below a gazillion or so times, but if you’ve had burning questions or was wondering what was going on with what book and which character, I’m going to recap some the most frequently asked questions.

1. What about Opposition?

I’m just going to get this question out of the way. Opposition is written. Has been written for at least two or so months now. It’s currently with the editorial peeps at Entangled Teen. The release is August 5th, 2014 in the U.S. I don’t know about any foreign releases. Alas, I am not kept up to date on those things. But the book is written. I get asked that a lot. So yep. It’s done. Everyone dies. Even rainbows. Ha. Just kidding! Only a few people die. Or none. OR EVERYONE.

2. When will we see Opposition cover?

I honestly don’t know. I don’t control when the covers are made or really when they will release them, but since this is the last book in the series, don’t plan on seeing the cover anytime soon. Probably not until spring or early summer. And I don’t know what the cover will look like, who of if anyone will be on it.

3. Is Opposition really the last book?

Yep. Maybe one day there will be another story to come from their world, and that is not a hint, but I’m known to get a hair up my behind with a story idea. But as of now, the series is over with Opposition.

4. New bound Lux Volumes

I talked about this in detail HERE but just to recap,  new bound editions of the Lux Series are coming out. I actually saw the mock up cover for the first cover earlier and I hearts it, and while I can’t tell you anything about the cover at this time, it’s stunning.

Both volumes release on June 3rd. There appears to be a paperback and a hardcover version up for pre order.

Lux Beginnings: (Obsidian/Onyx plus bonus content) PREORDER HERE

Lux Consequences (Opal/Origin plus bonus content) PREORDER HERE

5. Movie and TV news

For all movie(Obsidian film option  and TV updates (Covenant Series TV option) please check out the FAQ section. All current info I can share is there. Keep in mind, I have nothing to do with casting and any of that jazz. If you have a question about either of those options and it’s not answered under the FAQ, it means either I can’t answer that question yet or I don’t even know the question to the answer. Wait. That makes no sense. Sigh.

6. Wait for You series questions and what not

Cam and Avery are the main couple in Wait for You and in Trust In Me (TIM is the Cam POV plus new scenes of WFY). You will still see them in every book going forward, but they will not be the central couple. Be With me features Jase and Teresa, Cam’s best friend and little sister. Stay With Me features Calla, who you will meet in Be With Me, and a guy you haven’t met yet. Believe in Me, which is in the Fifty Firsts anthology features Brittany and Ollie, a short story I wrote since so many readers of Wait for You wanted to read their story. All the release info for all those books (BE WITH ME COMES OUT TUESDAY WEEEEEEEE!) are under the J. Lynn tab to your right at the top of the page.

Um… what else…?

AH-HA!

7. The Return

The Return is also known as Seth’s book. Seth was in the Covenant series. The Return is the first book in the Titan Series. I don’t know how many books are in that series yet. I’m writing this book next. If you want to see release schedule and books that I’m currently writing, check out the Extra’s page. I actually keep all that updated there for your viewing pleasure or displeasure.

The Return comes out in February 2015. It is a New Adult paranormal, actually the first NA paranormal I’ve ever written. Contrary to popular belief, Unchained and Obsession are not NA paranormal books. They are adult paranormal.

Some of the characters I promise you will see in The Return

Seth (dur)

Apollo (of course)

Deacon and Luke (because they have to be in it)

A Fury roomie who doesn’t like Seth (for obvious reasons)

Hercules (why not?)

Titans (lots of Titans)

A Pegasus. Or two. (Cuz, why not again?)

Medusa. She ain’t dead in my world. She’s a librarian. (Don’t talk too loudly in that library!)

Bob. (Don’t ask)

You will actually be able to read The Return without reading the Covenant Series.

8. Events!Here are two events I’m doing next week. You must come!! You must come!!

February 4th, 2014

2922 Broadway at West 115th Street

New York, NY

6:00pm

Q&A plus signing with Cora Carmack and Jay Crownover

Word Jersey City

February 5th, 2014

123 Newark Ave

Jersey City, NJ

7:00pm

Q&A plus signing with Cora Carmack and Jay Crownover

Check out my EVENTS page for the rest of the events I can currently confirm. BTW, I will be in Dallas in the Fall. It’s not added, but it will be.

9. Release Schedule

I have my release schedule broken down for you on my Extra’s page, but here it is also.

Upcoming Releases for 2014:

Be With Me releases February 4th, 2014 thru William Morrow/HarperCollins

White Hot Kiss releases February 25th, 2014 thru Harlequin Teen

Fifty Firsts Anthology releases February 25th thru Harper Impulse

Don’t Look Back releases April 15th, 2014 thru Disney/Hyperion

Tempting the Bodyguard releases in May 2014 thru Entangled Brazen

Lux Beginnings: Volume 1 (Obsidian & Onyx) releases June 3rd, 2014 thru Entangled Teen

Lux Consequences: Volume 2 (Opal & Origin) releases June 3rd, 2014 thru Entangled Teen

Opposition (Lux Book 5) releases August 5th, 2014 thru Entangled Teen

Stay With Me releases in September 2014 thru William Morrow/HarperCollins

Stone Cold Touch  (Book 2 in the Dark Elements) releases in November 2014 thru Harlequin Teen

That’s all I can think of! Oh, and don’t forget. Be With Me is almost out! There is a talk of a turtle play date in Be With Me.

Be With Me Sneak Peek!

The first five chapters of Be With Me were released this morning to the world wide web. If you haven’t read it yet, this is now your chance.

Be With Me comes out Feb. 4, 2014 in print and digital. Common pre order links below

Amazon

B&N

Apple Books

Don’t forget all those who live in the US or Canada, if you pre order Be With Me, digitally or in print, click on this FORM and follow the instructions, you will receive a special bonus scene of Cam and Avery! The bonus material will be sent to you between 2/4/14 and 2/7/14. And it’s a super sweet bonus scene!

And if you live in the UK, fill out this FORM to receive the bonus content, thanks to HarperCollins UK!!

There is also a big contest going HERE so enter that.

Now for your sample!

Be With Me Excerpt

Stockholm Syndrome

I should be writing. I need to finish this book before I head to NYC the first week of February, but something has been bouncing around in my head for a week or so.

It started with this post in the Huffington Post called The Myths and Realities of Self-Publishing written by the CEO of Kensington Publishing. Some of you might remember my mini rant on Facebook about how I felt about the information in this post, and to be frank, I and many other authors/people/llamas felt that there was a ton of misinformation on the realities of self-publishing, which is like the definition of ironic. I’m not going to get into all that, but I do suggest you read Laura Kaye’s post HERE which goes into detail about the misinformation.

Fast forward to last week or so where an author did a very honest post that–yeah, I’m gonna say it–the vast majority of people sort of missed the point and turned her into the poster child for anti-traditional publishing. When in reality, she was just kind of explaining why she can’t give away a ton of free crap all the time.

Anywho, that post spawned THIS post, which kicked off so many posts you’d think a damn mogwai was fed after midnight, and we ended up with THIS and THIS and THIS and there was even surveys created about how much money an indie author vs. a traditional author makes, which was inspired by Steve’s HuffPost article.

And I keep getting repeatedly drawn into the comments on these posts–and I seriously hope Steve stops responding to blog posts, because I have a book to write and I find this whole thing amazingly distracting. For realz.

But there was one thing that stood out to me more than the fact that the only thing Steve’s responses to authors seemed to solidify was the disconnect between what a publisher thinks their authors feels like and what the author actually feels like– I’m pretty sure there’s eventually going to be an Internet meme created to capture this.

But like I said. It’s not that. It’s ALL THE COMMENTS.

And what I mean by ALL THE COMMENTS is the downright hostility toward other people who make their own decisions based on contracts and the infinite number of variables that NONE of these people are privy to. Such as equaling a traditionally pub’d author to someone suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.

Yep.

Stockholm. Syndrome.

Or equaling the relationship between an author and their publisher to that of an abusive relationship the author keeps going back to.

That was classy.

And I could continue on about  the flaming insults and the insinuations from authors about other authors who do work with publishers, saying they are basically morons with no sense of business and should be patted on the head.

And we all know there are authors who think those who self-publish do so because they write crap books and are cluttering the market with their unsavory little piles of glittery poop that will make it harder for readers to find their SHINE LIKE A DIAMOND masterpieces.

Or they’re just lazy. Because writing a book you self-publish is like totes-ma-goats different and easier than writing like the same book that sells to New York.

Or those who self-publish just don’t like rejection. Like they’re so scurred of it that they just self-publish and, I guess, pray that no one leaves a bad review and rejects it??? Okay. I don’t even follow that train wreck of a thought process.

Seriously, ya’ll, what the fuck ever.

As everyone knows, I’m a huge supporter of self-publishing. Duh. I’ve self-published. I’ve also worked with small, independent presses. I’ve also worked with major, traditional houses. And I also plan on self-publishing again. I’ve had success, whatever qualifier I personally deem as success with small presses, bigger guys, and self-publishing. I like to think I’m smarter than the average person suffering from Stockholm Syndrome and smarter than the average person writing glittery, golden poop. So I think I make some good business decisions every now and then.

So I like to think my next  sentence comes from someone who’s had and will continue to have a foot on either side of what is not an imaginary line between Traditional vs. Indie.

There is no one way to publish a book that is right or wrong, or smarter or dumber than the other way, and just because you’ve found success or haven’t doesn’t make you the voice of GOD when it comes to publishing.

It does not matter that YOU made hundreds of thousands or millions on your advance or in your royalties. It does not matter that YOU made hundreds of thousands of dollars or millions self-publishing. It does not matter that YOU made below minimal wage with a traditional publisher. It does not matter than YOU self-published a book and faded into the night like a really bad writing cliche. None of this makes YOU or ME an expert on the many facets of publishing or where we can get up on the oh-so high pedestals that are so high up there that it must be a wee bit chilly that YOU know what is better for someone else when it comes to their publishing career.

There. I said it. Seriously.  No one knows everything. Writing and publishing books is not what I’d consider an accurate qualifier to be telling people how to make their OWN path in publishing while body slamming the other side like a drunk frat brother everyone is embarrassed of.

Here is where I use numbers, because numbers are fun.

1. Money isn’t everything.

And yet this is what really seems to get people going.

Now, I ain’t gonna lie. Money is great. Money is nice in a dolla makes me holla, Honey-Boo-Boo style, but not every single author makes every career decision based on how much money they’re going to get out of the book. And not always making decisions based on money doesn’t make an author a bad business person, but probably makes them more well rounded with longer longevity in the industry. I’m going to use myself as an example here. If I went into my first book contract thinking only about money and then deciding against that contract because it wasn’t throwing dollar bills at me like I was the hottest stripper in the club, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I didn’t self-publish Wait for You to make money. I self-published that book because I basically got rejected. I also didn’t take the highest offer in the auction when I sold Wait for You, because money truly isn’t everything when it comes to making career choices.

2. You’re a sell out. And you’re lazy.

Once again, using myself as an example.  I chose to sell Wait for You to a publisher because it was the right thing I felt that I needed to do for my career. It’s not selling out. There are things outside of money that publishers can provide you that self-publishing either can’t or makes it hard to do, like for example, print. There is still many, many readers out there that don’t read e books. And so what if I or any other author wants to be able to walk into a bookstore and see our book? How does that desire effect the authors that don’t care about that? It doesn’t. At least you’d think. P.S. They can also provide you with a shit ton of money that also makes it worth your while. Just saying.

Another thing is, the general public and other authors, are not privy to every contract and every call concerning a book or the future of a series or the author’s career. To make assumptions based off of absolutely no knowledge of why a person signed with a publisher or decided to go the indie route is really kind of disturbing. Like as disturbing as equating contracts to abusive relationships.

If an author decides they don’t want to work with a publisher or they don’t want to shelf a book that’s been rejected, that doesn’t make them lazy. Self-publishing is hard. All you traditional authors out there looking down your noses at them? Try formatting a effin book for loading. I think you’ll find a new respect for them. I tried it for two seconds and was all like…

I hired someone who apparently likes torturing themselves.

Each decision an author makes in terms of their career is the decision they feel is right for them, if that means signing with a NY publisher, a small press, or going indie, and that’s all that matters in the end, because really, other people’s opinion’s on it are pretty much just people talking from their asses. I hate to say it. You’re not better than them because of your choices. You are not a special snowflake.

3. Can’t we all like hug one another and shitz?

Being an author is kind of hard just, you know, writing lots of words and then taking those words, polishing them into that glittery golden poop, that do we really need to be so disrespectful of each others decisions when it comes to what we do with our OWN words? Like isn’t the whole process, going to New York or going indie or sitting down at the computer for the day and not hanging out on Twitter all day, seriously not stressful enough that we don’t need to make it harder on each other? Why is there author on author hate based on the method of publication? Why isn’t their more support for one another, because in the end EVERY book no matter the method of getting into a person’s hands, creates MORE readers. And isn’t that really what writing is about? Hell. Isn’t that why we’re all writing in the first place?

4. Mind your beeswax, yo.

The amount of time that it took me to write this post probably equals to half a chapter or time I could’ve spent honing my craft, or hell, playing Mario Brothers on the computer, because honing my craft is hard and tiresome and I’m lazy  and currently in an active abusive relationship with lots of publishers, so I’d probably should’ve spent this time drinking or something.

Being a hybrid author is soooooo harrrrrrd.

I can’t imagine the amount of time some of these people spend dishing out their opinions on why their method of publishing brings all the readers to the yard more than someone else. Like, I don’t know, if an author didn’t come on  the blog and ask for advice, can’t we all just mind our own beeswax and actually focus on writing a wee bit more? I mean, if your chosen path works for you, that’s great, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to work for everyone else.

Radical concept, right?

Everyone has different experiences with publishers and self-publishing. For every bad story about a publisher, there’s one just as bad about self-publishing. The world, and especially the industry is not perfect.

Another radical concept.

And for glittery, golden poop’s sake, can we stop acting like publishers are the equivalent of the anti-Christ and that self-publishing is killing the whole industry? Or that Amazon is going to eat our little, literary babies? Because I’m going to say this again, publishers big and small, self-publishers, and Amazon, all get books into the hands of people which creates more readers which benefits everyone.

So in closing….

There are many ways to be happy with your career in publishing. There is no one right way. There is no one answer for every book or every author. But the one thing is for sure, assuming that you know the right way and the only way is the wrong way.

And you’re probably end up coming across as either an insecure or bitter douche canoe.