Michael Joe Armijo's Blog, page 75

The Beginnings - Part 46: A KISSING TACTIC

There is a big difference between telling your troubles and talking what is in your heart.
-Michael J Armijo
PHILOSOPHICAL STATEMENTS

The Beginnings – Part 46: A KISSING TACTIC

June 24, 1983

I cruised to work today in the Mustang Convertible and received a surprise phone call from Tammy Duhr while at my desk.
Tammy pouted, “I was told by Michael last night that you were pissed off at my behavior at the parking lot last night.”
“What? I didn’t even notice anything. Someone’s just trying to cause trouble.”
“Okay, I just wanted to be sure.”
“You were too quiet to make me feel pissed at you anyway. I just couldn’t go back to the LOT after Frank and I saw you because I had to be at work early.”
“You know…Rick Clark is in the area again.”
I remembered Rick from that random BBQ a few days ago. The thought of him makes me question my feelings for some reason. He’s so attractive. Tammy and I continued with a nice, long morning chat.
I said, “I think Frank’s surprise plan is to bring a girl to your party.”
She started to giggle.
“You never know with him.”
“That’s true.”
“Who knows?”

I drove my car for a car wash. It was strange when I went through the Bubble Machine.

During my day a strange man came up to me and initiated a conversation about the Custom Calling Features.
After some explanations by me he winked at me and said, “I actually just wanted to meet you.”
Yuck! That really threw me off-guard. I didn’t expect that comment. I was freaked-out.

After work I took a quick spin to Alameda to pick up my mail that had accumulated at mom and dad’s house.
Once at my apartment I took a shower, shampoo and shine and cruised over to Tammy’s for our heavy date to see Ann-Margret perform in San Francisco. She was actually performing at the Golden Gate Theater. I had a little trouble finding the Theater. It was a great concert. She can really move. She looked so vivacious and sexy in all of her costumes. I can’t wait to see how the pictures look that I took. I love Ann-Margret. Her legs, body, face and ‘everything’ is just so right. I want that woman!

After the show Tammy and I went to IVEY’s in San Francisco. It had a quaint atmosphere. We enjoyed ourselves, talking about each other, relationships in general, Frank, and her forthcoming party. We just plain had fun. We left Ivey’s after a picture-perfect evening. There wasn’t even any trouble finding a parking space. The arrival at the restaurant was timed perfectly, too. When we arrived back at my place in San Leandro we exchanged some more French kisses.
She blushed and said, “I really like the way you lick my gums.”
I laughed. It was a kissing tactic that Suzy Miller had taught me.
“No one has ever done that before,” Tammy smiled as she rolled her eyes, loving it.
I could tell that Tammy was ecstatic when I kissed her that way.

Anyway, while in my apartment we were rudely interrupted by a phone call from Frank.
He asked point-blank, “Did you take Tammy to see Ann-Margret?”
How could I lie with her right there, looking at me?
I answered, “Yes.”
Tammy’s facial expression immediately became one of total shock. She didn’t think I would tell him. I figured it would add to the drama of my diary. Ha-ha.

Meanwhile, once I confirmed the date Frank started to scream crazy things.
“Our relationship is OVER!” Frank shouted.
“What?” I asked, playing dumb.
“I don’t ever want to see you again!”
He was in a panic-stricken state. He was so upset. I tried to calm him down, explaining how innocently it all happened.
Frank’s tantrum was too hard to handle. He was acting too much like a child. It was hard to control him.
This was the second incident with Frank since Tuesday night that seemed to blow out of control.
Oh well…Frank just hung-up the phone after I said, “Bullshit! Frank, we didn’t have a date tonight.”

Tammy continued to gently scratch my upper torso as we kissed. I got excited. I couldn’t figure out how to take off her pantyhose. (?) It was funny.
I said, “I don’t have a lot of experience in taking those things off.”
Due to Tammy’s fatigue I drove her home. It was approximately three o’clock in the morning.

One style of sex can be bare bones, fundamental and unromantic, but a kiss is the height of voluptuousness, an expense of time and an expanse of spirit in the sweet toil of romance, when one’s bones quiver, anticipation rockets, but gratification is kept at bay on purpose, in exquisite torment, to build to a succulent crescendo of emotion and passion.
-Diane Ackerman
A NATURAL HISTORY OF THE SENSES

The Beginnings - Part 45: WOES AND BEAUS

“I’m a very easy man to understand…I don’t like things held up before me that I cannot have.”
-Arthur Golden
MEMOIRS OF A GEISHA

The Beginnings – Part 45: WOES AND BEAUS

June 22, 1983

I was much too tired to work today. Can you blame me? Therefore, I didn’t do much. I should have taken Tammy’s advice.
Tammy asked, “Why don’t you take the day off? “
I didn’t choose to do that. I didn’t want to ruin my flawless attendance record.

I did take an extensive nap during my lunch hour from 11:45AM until 1PM.

I telephoned Frank during my first break.
I said, “Frank, I just want to tell you that the Ann-Margret engagement is off.”
“But…why?”
“Well, after the events of last night I just think we both need a breather.”
After I hung-up the phone I realized that I would be going to see Ann-Margret with Tammy. I felt I gave Frank a good reason. We have been spending too much time together. When one includes the Los Angeles trip it makes it even seem like more time. Frank’s attitude and overreactions from last night were too much. I do seriously need a break from him. I will see how going out with Tammy works out on Friday.

I drove to Alameda for dinner. Ma and Pa were getting ready to go to Judy Garcia’s wedding. Judy is the youngest daughter of my dad’s half-sister, Esther. I didn’t go. Instead I went home and rode my bike to the bank.

Frank called me. I was much too tired to get into a deep conversation with him.
I said, “Listen…why don’t I call you tomorrow morning. I’m just too exhausted now to ‘get into it’.”
“Okay.”
I slept for the remainder of the night.

Before I knew it the alarm clock rang at 7AM. I was happy I slept the entire time.

Oh, I did neglect to mention that I did call George Jones in San Jose. He was at work (a video store called The Wherehouse). I gave him my telephone number. If he calls me back, then ‘fine’. I don’t plan on calling him again.
Last night George looked at me fondly and suggested, “Maybe we could go out sometime.”
I don’t really know anymore.

I also called Rich (aka Richard Anderson). Some old lady answered the phone, so I refrained from leaving a message. I mean, Rich is okay…but that’s just it (okay).

I do really like Frank’s LEO (astrological) self. In some ways I can live without him. Tammy is an ARIES. I can only compare her to Barbara Reynolds. She is the only other ARIES that I know personally. Rich is a LIBRA (like Helen Wong and Suzy Miller); whereby, that can’t be all bad. We shall see who will become more than an acquaintance. For now, I do believe that Frank will be ‘forever-a-friend’. I trust that will be the case.

June 23, 1983

Well, I took BART to work this morning. There was a cute gal sitting across from me who gave me ‘the eye’.
I thought, “Hell, I’ve experienced that before and the circumstance never seems to pan out in my favor.”

While in the Pacific Telephone PUBLIC OFFICE I telephoned Frank (as promised).
We made an agreement. He will meet me at my apartment in San Leandro at six o’clock this evening. We will talk face-to-face. This is good (I guess).

Doug Siu influenced me by saying, “You know, Mike…you should call that RED ROBIN place and find out the name of that hostess you like so much.”
I did it. I spoke to her manager and gave her a commendation. Her name is Allison. She is A-OK in my book. I already wrote a note with my business card for her. I plan to hand it to her tonight (provided she is at work).
I enjoyed lunch today with Barbara Reynolds, the ARIES. She talked about her woes and beaus.
“My latest,” Barbara said, “Robert…went out with another girl.”
“I see.”
She sighed.
I said, “You know, I met a girl named Tammy. She’s an ARIES, like you…but I’m sort of torn because I have a crush on this hostess named Allison.”
Barbara laughed, “I think you should play the field and wait and see.”“You think so?”
“Why tie yourself down to any one person yet?”
“You’re right!”

I was glad we had our little talk. The fresh cherries she shared with me were also quite ‘yummy’.

I ate at the SOUP N’ SUSHI joint. When I returned to the PUBLIC OFFICE the ventilation system had been cleaned out. It made the entire office smell like someone farted. Ugh! How disgusting!

A gentleman by the name of Paul Patterson came over to inquire about the Call Waiting service. His telephone number is 839-4370.
Paul said, “That’s a really nice shirt.”
He made some other remark that sounded like he was trying to pick me up. I couldn’t be sure, so I just played dumb. He was okay but it was all so weird. To top it off I learned that he is a stockbroker at EF HUTTON. I was curious.

When I arrived home after my bike ride Frank was nowhere to be found. He hadn’t arrived.
I called Tammy and asked, “What are you doing Friday night?”
“I haven’t forgotten about our date…if that’s what you mean.”
“Good…I was just checking because we are ‘on’ for Ann-Margret.”

Frank appeared. He finally showed up.
My phone rang and it was George Jones.
George asked, “Why don’t you come over to my place here in Sunnyvale tonight?”
I didn’t go but I was flattered.
Frank knew it was George and shouted out, “He’s busy…and he’s TAKEN!”

Frank and I ended up going to the Bay Fair Shopping Center. Allison (of the RED ROBIN) was not working tonight. I drove back to my house and Frank was acting quite ‘blah-zay’. He wasn’t very approving about my new Bryan Adams music tape that I bought at THE RECORD FACTORY. I also bought new SONY Walkman headphones at Montgomery-Ward.

Frank and I went out again and we bumped into Tammy and the ‘gross looking guy’ named Michael. We were cordial with our mutual greetings.
Tammy asked me privately, “Drop by after you drop Frank off.”
I didn’t do that though. I went straight home and decided to call George Jones. We never finished our phone call.
I said, “I just wanted to apologize for Frank’s behavior when he yelled out while I was speaking to you earlier.”
“Oh, that’s okay.”
“Frank has some growing up to do.”
“He did seem somewhat immature.”
“Yeah, I think so, too.”
George asked, “So, would you like to come over on Saturday night for a Light Show that they do here?”
“I don’t know. It sounds interesting. I’ll let you know.”
“Okay.”
I doubt if I’ll go. I didn’t want to seem so hard up that I had to drop everything to see him again so soon. I also don’t feel like the long drive to Sunnyvale. My night was over after my nice talk with George.
I slept soundly, thinking that Frank and I would still remain in good terms.
I smiled as I recalled when Frank said tonight, “I’m trying to fall UNMADLY in love with you and into just liking you a whole lot.”
He’s finding our relationship to be a tad difficult.
Frank said, “I have a surprise in store at Tammy’s party this coming Saturday night.”
“That should be interesting,” I said, wondering what it could be.

He lay back in the leaves with his hands behind his head, watching the thinning foliage of maple above him quiver against the sky, so dark the sky that it was almost purple. He took a deep breath through his nose, and took in the cleansing scent of the forest. The laws of science do not distinguish between the past and the future. Yet there is a big difference between the past and the future in ordinary life: “The increase of disorder or entropy is what distinguishes the past from the future, giving a direction to time.”
-Thomas Harris
HANNIBAL

The Beginnings - Part 44: KISSING TAMMY

He lowers her until she’s lying on her back and removes the rubber band from her ponytail, so that her hair spreads out across the sheet covering his thighs—she doesn’t so much as bat an eyelash.
-Nancy Huston
THE MARK OF THE ANGEL

Approximately Twenty-five years ago
Sometime in August 1987

I have a postcard of two beach lounge chairs under a tree, facing a blue and pink sunset. I sent this postcard to my mother and wrote the following:

Dear Mom,
…For ironing my clothes that day
…For just plain being the BEST mom ever
…Because your birthday is coming up (September 6th)
…And because I LOVE YOU.
Here is a little something, especially chosen for you by me.
Love Forever,
Michael J Armijo
The Beginnings – Part 44: KISSING TAMMY

June 20, 1983

My first day back to work was a breeze. I was in the Public Office and I will be working there for the rest of this week. It’s a test pilot thing to see if I can sell custom calling features and gift certificates to walk-in customers.

I dropped over at the BASS Ticket Office during my lunch break to find out what was going on in terms of concerts and events. I would like to attend the following:
DAY ON THE GREEN #1 on July 30th
A FLOCK OF SEAGULLS on July 8th
THE B52’s on July 1st
ANN-MARGRET in San Francisco ‘this week’ at the CORONET THEATER
I shall soon decide.
I shared a strawberry ice-cream cone and some pistachios in front of the 2150 Webster Street Office Building with Nici Maurino in Downtown Oakland. Nici didn’t even bother to mention the events of a week ago when I called her and some mysterious fellow answered the phone. Does she want to block it from my mind?
Nici did say, “I saw two movies this week.”
“Oh…what did you see,” I asked.
“RETURN OF THE JEDI and OCTOPUSSY,” she replied.
I began to wonder who accompanied her to see the movies. I didn’t bother to ask.

After work I called Frank. We were clearly in our introductory phase as we both spoke of how we missed each other.

Doug Siu telephoned me later in the evening. We talked about our astrological signs, people’s personalities, each other, our age and a possible excursion to the GREAT AMERICA amusement park in Santa Clara.
Doug said, “I still can’t get over the fact that Helen is thirty-five years old.”
“She doesn’t look her age.”
“No, she looks GREAT!”

June 21, 1983

Today was a more productive day in the Public Office. I sold more. There were also some prettier girls that walked in to the office. In fact, I was sure I saw Lisa Pingatore and the ‘bitch’ just ignored me. I am sure it was her. I am also sure that she recognized me. Such is life.

I did see a beauty during my lunch break at the POT BELLY DELI. The real question is whether we will ‘eye’ each other again one day.

I also broke down and bought two tickets to see ANN-MARGRET perform at the CORONET THEATER this Friday night. I notified Frank that we are attending. It should be a blast.

I guess I plan to see Frank tonight along with his friends Tammy and Sean at the skating rink. It’s ‘gay’ night. It ought to be interesting.

I plan to visit Helen Wong before the skating rink visit to show here the pictures I took at our SF Bay Cruise. She wants to see my PLAYGIRL COVER picture, too. Ha-ha.
I left Helen’s pad soon after Susan Espino arrived. I ate two slices of Helen’s banana nut bread. It’s so delicious.

I arrived at the skating arena and Frank was nowhere to be found at 7:30PM. He had promised me he would be there. He finally appeared and blamed the driver (another guy named Michael).
I didn’t really like the skating joint. I wanted to leave by 9PM.
“I think I’m going to leave,” I said to Frank.
Frank almost went into tears. I was shocked. What a cry baby. His eyes were starting to water up. I care for the guy but after tonight I’ve decided I need some space from him. I don’t even know how to roller skate, so he should know how boring it is for me to just be on the side lines, watching people go ‘round and round’.

Frank is just TOO MADLY IN LOVE with me…or something. Perhaps it is his youth and he is simply too immature. I did decide to stick around the skating rink after Michael and Tammy introduced me around to some other people. Frank chose to just skate around the arena (as he kept an eye on me from time to time).

I began to speak to a young skater guy named George Jones. He seemed super nice. He has the most gorgeous blue eyes. They’re dreamy.
“How old are you?”
“Nineteen,” George answered.
I would say he seemed a tad more mature than Frank. I could tell that Frank was jealous because I was chatting with him.

As the night dragged on I started to get friendly with Tammy Duhr to the point that we were actually ‘KISSING’.  I must be listening to that KISS ME song too much. I went out to the parking lot and had a couple of daiquiri cocktails that were safely secured in the car. That enhanced the kissing ‘Tammy’ situation.
Frank was so pissed about the scene. He remained silent, giving me a stern look. He stormed out of the skating place shouting, “Oh Fuck it…leave me alone!”
I was shocked. Everyone was concerned about him. He didn’t say those words to me. I wasn’t sure who he was speaking to. Maybe it was directed for me.
I thought, “Gee…he could have a nervous breakdown if I hurt him in some way.”
I knew it was a delicate situation and I didn’t want to harm him in anyway. Tammy, Michael and I all looked for him and finally saw him by Michael’s car.
Frank was rambling two words over and over: “Mother-fucker!”
I ran up to him before anyone else and whispered, “You know I love you.”
“Oh yeah?” he asked, “I’m just some fuckin’ seventeen year old and you’re twenty-four!”
It made no sense. His yelling at me in the parking lot made me very upset. I was also embarrassed with the group watching nearby.

After things became more organized we drove to SEASON’S COFFEE SHOP for laughs. It seems many of the skating entourage tend to go there afterward. We all seemed to be having a good time, including a water fight at the table. Frank still remained silent and gave me the ignorant treatment but he came around a little bit.
Tammy and I were flirting continuously.
Frank asked me, “Could you take me home now?
I did as he requested but I signaled to the group that I would return.

I merely kissed Frank goodnight while in my car and he went into his house. I drove back to the SEASON’S COFFEE SHOP (which wasn’t very far). I managed to get the telephone numbers of Richard Anderson and George Jones who happened to be there.

I drove home with Tammy in my car (if only Frank knew). I was thinking that I would call George Jones. I didn’t know. It’s amazing what a couple of daiquiri cocktails could do.
Tammy walked with me into my apartment and we stayed awake all night. We were talking, kissing, caressing and ‘yummy-ing’. I didn’t go all-the-way. I tried to explain why.
“I just like to start a relationship slowly,” I explained.
She had big dynamite blue eyes as she smiled at me.
I added, “I don’t like to ruin it by hopping in bed…the first thing.”
I could tell she liked my response. We continued to talk a lot about this past evening. Tammy seemed to know Frank and his sensitivity quite well.
Tammy announced, “I am sure Frank had some sexual events with his History teacher, Mr. Stringham.”
I was surprised and said, “You’re kidding me!  I just don’t know about him.”

Tammy and I returned to the SEASON’S COFFEE SHOP in the morning. She spent the night and it was nice lying with her on my futon. We had a plan.
“I will shake off Frank for Friday so we can go see Ann-Margret.”
“How are you going to do it?” Tammy asked.
“I’ll just tell him that I need time to think after the explosive events of last night. I’m sure he’ll understand based on the circumstances.”
After my breakfast with Tammy I drove directly to work.

“I totally believe that love conquers all.  Sometimes you just have to give it some space.”
-Candace Bushnell
SEX AND THE CITY

The Beginnings - Part 43: RELATIONSHIPS ARE LIKE SHARKS

Claiming that respected historical figures—ranging from Julius Caesar, Michelangelo, Shakespeare to Walt Whitman to Oscar Wilde—were homosexuals helped enhance the usually maligned character of gay men.
One well-educated gay prisoner interviewed by a prison doctor in the early 1920s listed ‘Shakespeare, Coleridge, De Quincey, Rosa Bonheur, Joan of Arc, Beethoven, Wagner and Napoleon as homosexuals,’ in order to buttress his contention that “most of the world’s genius can be traced directly to the homosexual.”
-George Chauncey
GAY NEW YORK

The Beginnings – Part 43: RELATIONSHIPS ARE LIKE SHARKS

June 18, 1983

Frank and I ventured over to a Coffee Shop across the street from the Caravan Motel in Gorman (CA). We had to wait patiently for the processing of my American Express card. I don’t know why it took so long.

I allowed Frank to drive the car part of the way to Northern California. I had some minor heart failure while observing his driving habits. I felt the same way as he cruised along the hills of Beverly Hills. We switched seats and I chose to drive the rest of the way. Frank remained silent for most of the remainder of the drive. I could tell he was pissed-off about our ‘little nothing’ arguments. I felt the same way, so I played the silent treatment as well.

We had a good talk eventually. We reconciled our differences when we reached my apartment at THE TIMBERS in San Leandro.
Frank asked excitedly, “Do you want to go to Sean’s BBQ?”
I agreed.

We arrived at Sean’s pad for the BBQ and I realized the only people to show up were me, Frank, Rich, Rick Clark and Tammy Duhr. I believe I like Frank the most. Rick Clark really has nice looks (and a body to match) though (Hmmm?). Rick Clark and I danced together and he hinted something that surprised me.
Rick said, “You know…we should go to Hawaii together.”
I explained that I lived at THE TIMBERS.
Rick replied, “I know where you live.”
I thought that if I were ever in a one-on-one predicament with Rick Clark that I wouldn’t know what I’d do. I might melt in ecstasy.

The BBQ was an all-around fun adventure. I did have a good time. Everyone was quite nice. Frank ended up spending the night with me. We had the usual fun. It was also the first time he had spent the night at my pad.

Frank really is a rather special kind of guy. I do want to have an everlasting friendship with him.
I recalled Frank’s question the other day: “What would you do if the RIGHT girl came along?”
I had replied, “I’d ask you to be the BEST Man.”
He laughed. I laughed, too (but I was serious).
I feel kind of awkward as I write in my diary now because I do feel rather serious about Frank right now. I care very much about the guy. It must be love; however, I am torn as I still want that special girl to love. Maybe it will be Paige LaBris. She’s A-Okay in my book. I don’t know. Once again time will tell.

June 19, 1983

When Frank and I woke up this morning we showered and he foolishly slipped and fell in the shower. It was pretty funny. Luckily, he didn’t get hurt.

We left for Bay Fair Shopping Center after I spent some time writing in my journal. We were both craving BBQ chicken sandwiches. I read an excerpt from my journal to Frank. I mainly read the parts where I wrote about him. I tried to single out the good things I’d written about him. He really is a great companion. I only dislike his ‘NELLIE’ ways. Those effeminate ‘NELLIE’ ways aren’t too conspicuous unless he overdoes it. He overdid it a bit while at Sean’s BBQ. Perhaps after a few drinks he felt at ease amongst his friends.

I drove Frank home to Hayward. I also took one last photograph of him. I returned home to put on my SONY Walkman FM stereo headphones and hopped on my silver 12-Speed. I rode my bike to Alameda to find Dad at home.
Dad asked me, “So, what have you been doing with your life?”
I was quite surprised and a little shocked that he should ask this question at this time. It was as if he knew something that I barely knew myself.
I was nonchalant in my reply and said, “Vacationing.”

I watched THE EDGE OF NIGHT on videotape while at mom’s house because she had taped the last few episodes for me. While watching I heard a couple of lines from the show that I had to jot down because I liked the significance in the words:
1. “Say NOT goodnight…but in some brighter place bid me good morning.”
2. “Relationships are like sharks…they have to keep moving to stay alive.”

I took a nice nap and ate dinner at mom and dad’s house in Alameda until I decided it was time to take the bike trek back to my apartment in San Leandro.

When I returned to my apartment I decided to telephone Frank. I realized that I missed his not being around.
When I called him I asked, “What are you doing?”
“Right now I’m having a talk with my sister and mother.”
I could just picture them in the dining area, discussing me. As I talked to Frank I came to learn that his mother now knows that we are MORE than just friends.
Frank said, “She doesn’t approve of our relationship.”
“What?”
“It’s true, but I don’t care. I have until the twenty-third of July to move out, that’s my eighteenth birthday.”
“I thought you were already eighteen!”
After much discussion I realized that Frank’s mother is under a lot of pressure over Frank and his thirty-two year old sister, Cathy.
I finally said, “I’m sure she’ll get over it.”
I had told Frank before to simply tell his mother that we were ‘just friends’.
Frank insisted, “She kind of knew that there was probably more going on.”
I said, “That may be true…but we are close friends. We just have a private way of expressing our love and friendship for one another. It’s almost like any other friends. It’s just that I have only one explicit, discreet relationship with one man right now and it happens to be you!”
Frank agreed, “I know.”

I like this new song that goes KISS ME WITH YOUR MOUTH.  It’s so sexy.  It makes me want to kiss.  It’s actually called KISS ME by Stephen Duffy.

Tomorrow is my return to work day. I guess I am as ready as ever to return.

Frank telephoned me from a phone booth around the corner from his mom’s house. I thought this was rather ridiculous.
Frank said, “I just needed some privacy from my mom and sister.”
“Oh, okay.”
Frank asked, “Could you keep this Friday open for a pool party at Tammy’s house?”
Tammy Duhr is the great looking body beautiful blond with the mediocre looking nose. Frank went to high-school with her. They are very good friends.
I said, “Okay, I guess I can go to a pool party.”
I simply couldn’t stop thinking that there’s still something missing in my life. I honestly felt that I lacked a lady. I began thinking of that hostess at the RED ROBIN restaurant again. Is there any hope?

“I’m tough, ambitious, and I know exactly what I want,” she was fond of saying. “If that makes me a bitch, okay.”
-Madonna
THE DAY JOHN DIED by Christopher Andersen

The Beginnings - Part 42: OPEN ARMS

When he understands that he is swimming, that is ALL he understands. He doesn’t know who he is, why he is there, or how he got there. He has no history and no future; he is just a consciousness at night in the middle of the sea.
-Sebastian Junger
THE PERFECT STORM

THE BEGINNINGS - Part 42:  OPEN ARMS

June 17, 1983

Frank and I awoke rather early (9AM) and cruised over to Valencia, CA to see about getting in to the MAGIC MOUNTAIN Amusement Park. Frank was overly excited about this day at the amusement park. Frank had been there before.
“I can’t believe how much it’s changed since the last time I was here,” Frank revealed.

We had fun on the amusement park rides. The Colossus and the Log Ride were my personal favorites. The Freefall ride was fun, too. Frank pissed me off because he didn’t want to ride the SPIN OUT ride. He’s such a ‘puss’ sometimes. That’s what I hate about him. Whenever he would get on my nerves I would let him know how I felt. I’d tell him like it is, being critical of his actions. He would, of course, remain silent for long periods of time. The ‘all of a sudden’ his mood would change and he’d start flirting aloud and smacking kisses to random chicks that walked by at the amusement park.

We met Lisa, Linda and Denise. These three girls were very pretty (quite cute). Frank and I were yearning for Denise in particular. She was spectacular in looks (despite her big ass). I took pictures with her as did Frank. They played on to us and were flirtatious right back.

The Rock and Roll music was good at MAGIC MOUNTAIN that night. We didn’t really dance though. We decided to go for more rides and just have fun.

I almost bought an ARTISTIC T-Shirt. They couldn’t do an exact replica of what I wanted, so I passed on it.
I said, “Later.”
I just cancelled my order.  It was a bitch. We had to wait and it seemed like a waste of time.

We left MAGIC MOUNTAIN by 11PM and decided to stay at a random place in Gorman, California called the CARAVAN MOTEL. It is a town that is situated in-between Los Angeles and Bakersfield. It was funny how we were in bed together and our spats from earlier in the day were totally forgotten.

dsWe realized how much we liked each other. We just wanted to lie close to each other. It was just like that tune by the rock band JOURNEY called OPEN ARMS.

“You cannot force love where there is none.”
-as heard in the 2002 TV series
THE FORSYTE SAGA

The Beginnings - Part 41: GET IT GIRL!

“We French consider all passions healthy.”
-as heard while watching the
2002 TV series THE FORSYTE SAGA

The Beginnings – Part 41: GET IT GIRL!

June 16, 1983

Someone on Hollywood Boulevard approached Frank and I about attending a free TV game show called CHILD’S PLAY. We rejected the offer because Frank had his heart set on going to UNIVERSAL STUDIOS.

It was fun at UNIVERSAL STUDIOS. It was quite hot. I took a Photo-Magazine shot of myself on the cover of a PLAYGIRL Magazine. It looks ‘okay’…nothing great.

Frank’s actions have been getting on my nerves a little bit. Whenever I critique something that he says or does I recognize his hesitation to ‘blow up’ to my face; whereby, he chooses to simply give me the silent treatment.

After our tour of UNIVERSAL STUDIOS we tried to find the residence of actress Ann-Margret in Beverly Hills. I had an address of 999 Doheny Drive. It didn’t seem to exist. While I was driving I took notice of another ‘foxy looker’ who happened to drive adjacent to me. She smiled at me in such a sexy way. She turned off at Rodeo Drive and I was sure I’d never see her again. We ended up getting lost in Beverly Hills and never did succeed in finding Ann-Margret’s house. It’s still sort of a mystery because that address seemed non-existent. That was the address I used to write her and she wrote back with a photo to me and wrote: TO MIKE, WARMLY ANN-MARGRET.

We continued our adventure in my car through Santa Monica Boulevard via a very gay area. I didn’t like the atmosphere very much. It made me uncomfortable. We managed to soak it up as we checked out a flower shop. We also went across the street to browse at the INTERNATIONAL MALE retail clothing store. We didn’t bother to buy anything. Frank did purchase a special card for me with the imprint: I’ve got a feeling I’m going to love you for a long, long, time.
He’s a nice guy.

While Frank was trying on sunglasses there was some gay guy who tried to swoop on Frank at the INTERNATIONAL MALE store. He stopped his advances when he realized I was with him.

That evening we went to Hollywood Boulevard to see a motion-picture in 3D called SPACE HUNTER, starring Peter Strauss and Molly Ringwald. The previous night we’d seen some film crew filming a real-life movie that will be titled ANGEL.

There was some old man who gave Frank a big “Why Hello There!” as he checked-out Frank in his white outfit (white jeans and white shirt). We were getting a few whistles from girls from across the street and in cars that drove by. That was funny.
I said, “Those girls are always brave while driving-by in a car…but when they’re standing right in front of you they remain silent.”

There was some ugly black dude who puckered his big lips in my direction as though he wanted to blow me a kiss.
I whispered to Frank, “Yuck”.

Frank and I stopped at a donut shop and then returned back to our hotel.

How could I forget?  There were also two very good-looking girls that we noticed who were holding hands. That was surprising.
One of them said, “Hi.”
And I cracked-up when Frank said, “Get IT, girl!”

That’s not my style. I’ll lecture you and tell you you’re wrong. But I can’t stay angry with you or want to punish you.
-Christopher Bram
SURPRISING MYSELF

The Beginnings - Part 40: HISTORY

“I’d never thought of myself as handsome, but had discovered…that I did look young, which passed with some people as a kind of handsomeness.”
-Christopher Bram
SURPRISING MYSELF

The Beginnings – Part 40:  HISTORY

June 11, 1983

This morning I made some peanut butter and jelly on toast. The only problem was that I found the milk in my refrigerator to be spoiled. The date had expired on the carton. Yuck!

Frank telephoned at around 11AM and asked, “Could you pick me up around one o’clock so I can come to lay out by the pool?”
“Okay,” I replied.
In the meantime, I added fuel to my car and cruised over to Alameda for my towels and pants that I had left there. My dear mom had washed and ironed the pants.

By the time I returned to San Leandro it was 1PM so I called Frank, “I just got home. I’ll be over to pick you up soon.”
I had to drive to Hayward. It wasn’t far and I chose to drive along Mission Boulevard because I didn’t feel like dealing with the congestion of cars on the freeway.

Frank and I did lay out by the pool. We had fun. It was especially amusing when I threw his socks into the pool. I’m trying to get him to stop using the phrases “Oh God!” and “Bad”. It’s such teen slang. There are so many other ways one can express, using brilliant words.

Eventually we returned to my apartment and my dear friend ‘came’ on me again as we lay atop of each other on my living room floor. We followed that with an exquisite, tasteful, soapy, sensual shower; whereby, I ‘came’. It was very, very nice. I guess he thought so, too, because he suggested another shower tomorrow evening.
To use Frank’s own words, “It was the BEST shower I ever had!”

After our shower and his lengthy study of the perfect look for his hair we left for Alameda’s CHEF ROMANO PIZZA for a sausage and pepperoni pizza. Frank’s eyes lit up at the idea of pepperoni. I don’t particularly like pepperoni but I knew it would please him.

When we returned to San Leandro Frank used my phone to call his friend, Shawn, about borrowing some of his clothes.

I drove Frank to the home of his HISTORY teacher (who happens to be gay).
Frank said, “I might move-in with my HISTORY teacher. He’s ‘Bad’.”
Bad, of course, meant good. I don’t think it’s the greatest idea for him to move-in with his HISTORY teacher.
I said, “I don’t know, Frank. I think he wants to get in your pants sooner or later.”
“No way,” Frank shouted with a smile.
I’m afraid that one night Frank may be gullible and ‘wasted enough’ to entertain the old dude sexually.
I said, “You never know!”
Frank insisted, “He’s just a father figure.”
“Well, he seems kind of mysterious to me.”
“Besides, he likes to screw around with young boys!”
I laughed. My point was proven right there.
After meeting Frank’s HISTORY teacher and some other goon named Mike that happened to be there I dropped Frank at his house.

Frank called me when I returned to my apartment and said, “I just wanted to tell you that I miss you and that I’ll call you around three o’clock to arrange something for tomorrow.”
I thought silently, “We’ll have to see about that. I plan on riding my bike to Alameda for breakfast at mom and dad’s. I want some of dad’s birthday cake.”

I may also cruise over to Nici Maurino’s bar on Webster Street tomorrow. I’m a little hesitant about doing so. It’s only because I telephoned her earlier in the morning and some dude answered who I obviously woke up. It was probably one of the Alameda Naval guys who got lucky.
Nici exclaimed, “He’s just a friend…and he didn’t spend the night…just the morning.”
Does she think I was born yesterday? I could hear a gulp in her throat as she made her exclamation. It only confirmed her lie. I may as well face it. She’s a squid lover and a sleaze. I can’t stand it. I thought we may have slowly been turning our relationship into something kind of special…but now (?). Is she really worth it? No…it seems to me that ALL GIRLS can be a pain-in-the-ass. The list goes on: Traci Hill, Christa Keller, Karen Caster. They all have my phone number and I haven’t heard from one of those bitches. Oh well. I still have that RED ROBIN hostess and the Photography Studio chick to drool over until someone else turns up.

It’s not that Frank isn’t keeping me satisfied. He is great company, a loyal friend and I am beginning to really feel for the dude.
Frank had said, “I find myself thinking of you A LOT when I’m not with you.”
I am beginning to do the same.

June 13, 1983

Frank called me at 7AM.
I asked, “Do you want to go to L.A. with me this Wednesday?”
“Oh God,” he blurted and then said, “Uh oh”, realizing he shouldn’t have said it.
I smiled.
“I think I may be able to go,” Frank screeched.
“I’ll believe it when it’s FOR SURE.”

Helen Wong called me at 9:35AM.
“How’s it going?” I asked.
“My eye infection is worse, so I’m going to see a doctor.”
“How did it happen?”
“I went motorcycle riding to Santa Cruz on Saturday and something foreign entered my eye.”

I picked up Frank at his school. We went to Lake Chabot for a pleasant walk. We came to my apartment and fooled around a bit and followed that with a dip in the hot tub and pool. We headed for the shower for a climactic day. We went to eat at some chicken joint at Bay Fair Shopping Center. I sort of flirted with some girl named Lynsey. Frank seemed jealous. I thought it silly. I drove Frank home. As I drove to my place I thought about the hostess at RED ROBIN and realized how my infatuation over her was shot because she wasn’t there today.

I wrote a letter to Maria of Jalisco, Mexico because my mom said, “You got another letter from Maria Lourdes. The return address is Guadalajara.”
I realized I hadn’t answered her previous letter.

I also called Paige LaBris in Sacramento to cancel my visit this coming Thursday. My plans had changed as Frank and I intend on driving south to Los Angeles on Wednesday morning. I am looking forward to that trip. Frank’s graduation is tomorrow. That will prove interesting.

June 14, 1983

I rode my bike to Alameda again to visit mom.
I handed the letter to Maria and asked, “Mom, could you mail this?”
“Okay.”
I laughed, “That reminds me of that song called TAKE A LTTER TO MARIA.”
She laughed too saying, “I like that song.”
I also read the most recent letter that Maria had sent me. I guess she hasn’t forgotten me.

After the bike ride I came home to San Leandro. RB FURNITURE of Hayward left a message that my table was ready. There’s no telling when I will pick it up or have it delivered. I’m undecided. I keep putting it off.

I received a pink slip in my mailbox. I had a package at the post-office. What a pain!

My pictures from the SF Bay Cruise were ready. I was pleased by them.

I attended Frank’s graduation. It was okay despite the hard bench I had to sit on for hours. The lady seated in front of me was smoking and the smoke kept finding its way to the front of my face. That was annoying. Cough. After Frank’s graduation we went to RED ROBIN. My yearning for the desirable hostess dissolved as she was not there once again. After the special graduation lunch I took Frank home where I shared a few appetizers with his family. It was a nicely celebrated event.

June 15, 1983

Frank and I left for Los Angeles at precisely 6:30AM. It was an okay drive. Luckily, an asshole cop pulled me over and gave me two options, “You can either take a ticket from me or both of you can politely shake your heads and say ‘PLEASE NO’.”
Of course, like two puppets, Frank and I shook our heads and said aloud, “PLEASE NO.”
He didn’t give me the speeding ticket.

I stopped at a BURGER KING in Van Nuys; whereby, we organized all of our camera settings and whereabouts. We continued cruising along all the way down Sunset Boulevard and Rodeo Drive. We browsed around GIORGIO’s, SAKS FIFTH AVENUE and I. MAGNIN. It was kind of boring but we found our way to an ice-cream joint for a root-beer float. We also found a hotel in the Beverly Hills area. We relaxed there after a thrust of excitement upon our arrival. We set off later for a bit of night life (after shampooing, conditioning, showering and shining).

We saw the most beautiful brunette in a blue-green mini dress on Rodeo Drive. Frank even thought she was gorgeous. While on Hollywood Boulevard we found a few card shops and bought ourselves L.A. T-Shirts.

I can’t say I like us right now. Either of us.
We should feel free to play, if we want to. Yes.
And we are male. I think there’s something in male biology that needs this sort of thing.
-Christopher Bram
SURPRISING MYSELF

The Beginnings - Part 39: BABY, IT'S YOU

My identity as a man would dissolve in self-pity, like sugar in warm water. -Christopher Bram, SURPRISING MYSELF
Twenty-five years ago today:

I received a letter from that guy named Bill Helbush that I met in Hawaii. It was dated August 10, 1987. Bill wrote:

Hi Mike,
Glad you liked the cards—with all the ones you have it’s hard to recall which you need.

Your card caught up with me in California. I came back to sign some papers concerning some property in Elk and now I’m off again. The tenant in my house will leave the first week of September, so I’ll be back in the area around then. I’ll be spending time finishing, painting, etc. I will certainly have some time in the SF area. I’ll give you a call and maybe we can get together.

I had a great time in Provincetown but ran into the same situation you did in Hawaii. I guess some people mistake friendliness for other things.

I doubt a good-looking young man like you will be unattached for long—so—enjoy your freedom.

I’m not sure if I’m going back to Honolulu this winter. It’s getting too expensive and I’m a little tired of hopping around. …Thinking about an apartment in San Francisco. Who knows?

Well, take care…will be in touch soon. Have a good day.
Bill.

I also receive a postcard from Lottie dated August 7, 1987. Lottie wrote:

“Need a Roomie?” Call.
I still cannot find your BD card.
Hi!
Just a note to let you know I was thinking of you. I hope all is well with you.
Always,
Lottie
PS-Note this in the House Book: I don’t write often.

The card from Bill and the postcard from Lottie inspired me to type a letter to Paloma in France. I typed the following:

PALOMA
August 11, 1987
Tuesday Afternoon: 4:30PM

Dear Paloma:

Good news! I bought myself a word processer and now I may find the time to write to you more readily. This sure is convenient and I’ve created a number of files already. I call this my PALOMA file. I guess the main reason I bought it is because I have decided to go back to school. There is a Masters Program in Public Relations at Golden Gate University and I’ve decided to go. I start mid-September. Another good reason is that now I can input all of my writings from the 18 journals I’ve collected and written in since December 1982 into the word processer. It’s going to be quite a job to type it all in but I’ll enjoy reading back on the past events. I’ll have to send you excerpts of what I wrote when we first me…well, maybe if you’re nice.

It’s a beautiful day outside and I rode my bicycle yesterday but today I am in pain. Why? Well, I went to the dentist and he put just a bit of Novocain so I wouldn’t feel the pain and it wore off. He replaced an old filling. It hurts and I’m trying to get my mind off of it but it hurts.

I thought of you last night. I went to the gym and I ran into my friend, Scott Lauer. He’s from Ohio. He’s 22 and he’s in the Navy, stationed in Alameda. His boat which includes six-thousand men is now in port but they’ll be out to sea again on September 18th. Anyway, I gave him a ride home last night after our workout but he suggested a six-pack of Bud Light… (shame on me)…and I took him up on his suggestion and we drank till about 11:15PM, talking, catching up on things since I hadn’t seen him since the end of June when he was going to Ohio for a three week leave.

And how I thought of you was while we were in the car Scott asked me, “Turn on the light for a second.”
When I turned it on he laughed. That’s when I remembered you laughing at the same instant. Do you remember? You would laugh because the light wouldn’t come on atop the convertible hood for a lot of light but only at the bottom of the car by our feet. Oh well, just thought I’d share how a minor moment could make me back track my thoughts to you, Paloma.

How is your cigarette smoking habit coming along? I trust you’ve cut down quite a bit and are not having those cancer sticks just before you go to bed like the old days in Berkeley. Remember how I could tell when you were smoking over the telephone…clever me!

They opened a new club here in Alameda believe it or not…

The Beginnings – Part 39: BABY, IT’S YOU

June 10, 1983

I went on another bike ride to Frank’s school on Tennyson Road. I met with Frank this time. We walked and talked around the school grounds for a while. I left on my bike for my place after the visit. I had already been to Alameda to visit mom and pick up some towels and clothes.

As I rode my bike back to my San Leandro apartment I thought about my conversation with Frank.I confessed to Frank, “You know, I have a date with Nici tonight.”

I, of course, explained to him how I know Nici from the Pacific Telephone Installation Department. He seemed sad that I wasn’t going to see him again.

Alas, Nici backed out on our date at the last minute.
Nici cried, “I have to work until eight thirty tonight. Sorry…I need the money.”
And so, I waited on Frank to call me.

Frank and I ended up going to the Union City Drive-In movies to see the new James Bond 007 film OCTOPUSSY. It wasn’t so great because I couldn’t keep my mind on the motion-picture. I notice Frank was being so fidgety, so his movements were annoying. Frank wasn’t ‘into watching the movie’, so we left before the second flick started at about ten-thirty.

We talked about a trip to the amusement park, GREAT AMERICA, for this Saturday. Frank was so excited about this plan (like a little boy).
Frank said, “The only problem is my mom. She’s so strict.”

“Well, if you can’t go this Saturday…then you owe me a trip to GREAT AMERICA.”
He liked that.

After the OCTOPUSSY movie we came to my place and I wrote a page in his Year Book. I neglected to mention that he wrote me a nice, revealing note about his feelings for me. I was really flattered and overtaken when I read his written words. He also played a song for me by THE BEATLES called “Baby, It’s You”. It was intriguing to hear. I truly care a lot about Frank now. It’s hard to believe we’ve only known one another for only five days. I’m glad he enjoys my company as I most certainly enjoy his, too. No matter where we are we fit in.

Oh yes, before Frank and I went to the Drive-In movie we stopped to see a couple of his lesbian friends. I didn’t really feel very comfortable about meeting them. While they seemed to be very nice I was not really into meeting folks of that sort. Anyway, after I wrote into Frank’s Year Book we kissed ‘and stuff’ on my couch. It feels so good feeling him against me. He has those good-looks that my cousin, Troy Vigil, had when he was younger. Now my cousin, Troy, is such a burnout in the Sacramento area. He looks gross. What happened to him? Also, one of Frank’s grins reminds me of that girl named Karen Caster that I liked. He could pass as her cousin. She’s the one I met at STAR GAZE in Fremont a couple of weeks ago. The grin actually looks one-hundred percent better on him.

Frank finally ‘came’ on me as I continued to enjoy the lithe of his body against mine as we were lying on my couch. It felt so good and warm. Yummy…but there’s a lot we have to do yet.

I drove Frank home at about 1:30AM. We listened to some mellow tunes by Steve Winwood. I particularly like his number one song from last year called HIGHER LOVE. I began to wonder if we were experiencing a ‘Higher Love’.

I mentioned to Frank, “You know…maybe we can be roommates at some point.”
“I love that idea, Michael.”
It would probably have to be at my folks’ townhouse in Alameda.  I don’t know how he’d feel about being there.  Whatever…

Oh, Jackie Woods finally called to say, “I’ve been so busy with my four and five year old pre-schoolers.”
She’s a nice friend to have. We have such good discussions. I told her about Frank and she didn’t even flinch about it.

Frank may come over tomorrow. We plan to lay out by THE TIMBERS swimming pool. I hope he comes (and I do mean that in more ways than one after how good it felt last night).

He thought that every strong emotion such as love, hatred, or jealousy eventually showed itself in some great gesture, and not always in the form of a clear illustration of that emotion, not always what the person himself, or the public, might have expected. He began walking, listening, but he heard only the innocent and absent-minded tweets of sparrows, and from somewhere a turtle dove.
-Patricia Highsmith
THE BOY WHO FOLLOWED RIPLEY

The Beginnings - Part 38: WE'VE ONLY JUST BEGUN

…being naked with a guy I liked suggested intimacy, trust.
-Christopher Bram
SURPRISING MYSELF

The Beginnings – Part 38: WE’VE ONLY JUST BEGUN

June 8, 1983

Mom called to say, “RB Furniture called and they said your tables are ready.”
“Oh good, I can’t wait until they finally deliver them!”
Dad’s truck isn’t available, so I am simply having RB deliver the tables to the apartment. The delivery charge isn’t too much money.

Frank called at 9:30AM during his free period at school. I am to meet him at around 1PM this afternoon at the San Leandro BART station. We will likely go somewhere for lunch and then go to my place for ‘whatever’.

Perhaps we will listen to KQAK tunes and/or ‘whatever else’. Hopefully, he’ll spring another unexpected smack (kiss) like he did when I dropped him off at his house on Monday night.

Well, I did find Frank, waiting at the San Leandro BART station. I drove off to TOGO’s EATERY. We shared a turkey, ham and Swiss cheese sandwich. After the meal we went to my apartment and listened to KQAK radio tunes while simply talking on my new love seat. We eventually got to the floor and had an intimate embrace in which we shared until almost 7PM. It seems we had only just begun.

That song by THE CARPENTERS came to mind: ‘We’ve Only Just Begun’. In other words it wasn’t just a ‘quickie’. We caressed. It was warm. The togetherness is something we both needed. I totally enjoyed it. I could clearly tell that Frank felt the same way. I drove him to his typing class in Union City.

Frank called me from the Hayward BART station where I picked him up and we met some ‘fat bitch’ at THE LOT (the parking lot).  
Frank said, “It’s always been called THE LOT.”
“Well, she wasn’t too nice.”
“No, that fat bitch!”
I laughed.
We cruised over to TACO BELL and met Frank’s good friend named Shawn. Shawn was a blond dude with braces. He was with his lover (apparently) named Jim. After meeting them I drove Frank home.
We parted glances and he said, “I’ll see you tomorrow at one o’clock.”
I agreed to pick him up once again at the San Leandro BART station so we could continue where we left off. We’ve only just begun.

June 9, 1983

Well, I did speak to my brother, John, over the phone today. I wished him a HAPPY BIRTHDAY. He is twenty-one years old today.

Frank Vasconcellos called me this morning and said, “I’m so upset.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Well, I can’t come by today because my mom was pissed because I got home so late last night.”
“Ten-thirty was late?” I asked.
“To her…yes.”
“All right…okay.   I'll call you later.”

I took a cruise on my bike to Hayward near Tennyson where Frank was attending school. I didn’t see him there, so I continued riding several times around the basketball courts. I had my BART bike permit, so I took my bike on BART at the Hayward BART station and disembarked in San Leandro. That was convenient.

I telephoned Frank later that evening and we made an arrangement for me to visit his place. I arrived at his house and we undressed in his bedroom and remained there. We embraced while cuddling, caressing and kissing. His mother was at work.

The phone rang and it was his mother.
Frank asked, “Guess what my mom said?”
“What?”
“She said I could stay out until nine o’clock.”
“That’s great…we can go to my place.”

Frank and I went to my pad and continued our caressing moments. We halted at about 8PM for a bite to eat at RED ROBIN (the joint where I had previously dined with Suzy Miller and Nici Maurino) at Bay Fair Shopping Center. That tall blond hostess was there.
I said to Frank, “She titillates me.”
I don’t think Frank liked that very much. She is tall, blond, and personable and has a pretty face. She is a ‘touch of class’.
I drove Frank home so that he would be there by nine o’clock. I was amazed as I drove back home though.

I was alone in my car and some blond dude cruised right next to my car, looked straight at me and said, “How ya doin?”

I didn’t know who in the hell he was but it was strange (and exciting at the same time).

I arrived home and telephoned Paige. We made tentative arrangements for a trip to Sacramento sometime next week. Who knows? Time will tell as to what I will actually do. I wrote a belated graduation card to Paige after I hung up the phone. She will like it. I am sure of that. It was that TEEN LUST card. If anything she ought to smile over it.

I hated to go to bed tonight. My hormones were on overdrive and I wanted Frank to be here. I thought the idea of Paige here would be nice, too. I’m ready too. I anticipated that my white Trim line phone would ring. It didn’t. It was only 10:20PM though. The night has only just begun.

Sometimes people want to be stupid and they do not want to know the truth.
-Mark Haddon
THE CURIOUS INCIDENT OF THE DOG IN THE NIGHT-TIME

The Beginnings - Part 37: EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE

We moderns…do not even speak of major personalities until we encounter men who have gone beyond all original and idiosyncratic qualities to achieve the greatest possible integration into the generality, the greatest possible service to the suprapersonal.
-Hermann Hesse
THE GLASS BEAD GAME

The Beginnings – Part 37:  EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE

June 6, 1983

I made an attempt to call John Alioto, my friend that I met in Mexico who happens to live in San Rafael now. Mom left me a message that he had called me in Alameda yesterday. He was not at home this morning when I returned his call.

I decided to phone Michael Miller. He was not home either. He is in school, facing finals and such. I left messages for both John Alioto and Michael Miller to call me. The only question is whether I will be here in my apartment when they call back.

I made myself breakfast and burn four pieces of toast. I need to strengthen my cooking skills. I guess ‘making toast’ is a good place to start.

I am now ready for another bicycle ride. I decided to ride over to Alameda. I took a nap at mom and dad’s house. When I woke up I watched THE EDGE OF NIGHT with mom and my brother, John. After the show I headed back home to San Leandro on my new wheels.

I took my car for a wash which cost me $3.95. I also had my hair cut by a girl named Paige at a place called PROPER CUTS in Hayward. After my hair cut I cruised over to Bay Fair Shopping Center for some Pina Colada yogurt with almond chip toppings. After the soothing dessert I went upstairs to talk to some blond chick who works at a photography studio. I may ask her out one day. I wonder why I didn’t ask for her name. I’ll have to find out soon enough.

PHOTO:  Frank Vasconcellos
I also went to a bookstore and purchased a couple of magazines. As I was leaving I noticed a young chap at the nearby video store. We exchanged glances as I walked out.
I smiled and said, “Hi.”
In a quick span of time I learned that his name is Frank and that he had walked to the video store.
When he mentioned that he lived in Hayward I asked, “Would you like a ride home?”
He accepted and gave me his telephone number when I dropped him off. He lives with his mom and seems like he could be a good friend. I intend on calling him tomorrow after my appointment with BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) for my bike permit. Such is life. Time will tell.

June 7, 1983

I think I was quite exhausted from my bike ride yesterday because I slept-in until 11AM. I ate some WHEATIES cereal and darted off (on my bike) all the way to Lake Merritt to get my bike permit for the BART train. It was a great ride. For once I really felt like a cycling pro. I was definitely ranking in the 12-speeds on the way back to San Leandro.

Once I arrived back to my apartment I telephoned mom and filled her in on the great ride and the BART bike permit.

At 2:30PM I telephoned Frank Vasconcellos and we had a long conversation. It was a really good talk. He likes to talk up a storm. I like him. I do think he’s overly infatuated with me. It could be just because I’m ‘new’ to his life. It was funny meeting him at that Video place.
The only thing I hate is when Frank frequently says, “Oh God!”
It sounds so effeminate. I expect to meet with him tomorrow. It should prove to be a nice outing. I hope so.

Nice Maurino called and we now have a tentative date for a movie this coming Friday night.
Nici exclaimed, “You know…I called you last Saturday.”
“Oh, I was probably at my mom and dad’s house,” I said, realizing that was when I was actually with Suzy.

Barbara Reynolds also called to find out if I got my BART bike permit. I told her how simple the process was for me. She was sweet to remember to remind me about the permit. Barbara also said she had tried to call me last Saturday. How sweet it is to know that both Nici and Barbara were calling for me.
I also explained, “Well, you know…I’ve been riding my new bicycle a lot!”

This evening my cousin, Sandy, and I will be going on an adventure on our bicycles. I can’t wait.

Oh yes, Suzy phoned me. I could tell that she has more time for my company now that her boyfriend, Don, is not thrilled about her new religious moods. Don seems to want to break it off.

My cousin, Sandy, was totally worn out after our bike excursion to Lake Chabot and Castro Valley. She clearly doesn’t have the stamina and training that I do. She will appreciate it when she feels the soreness of her ass tomorrow. Ha-ha.

Frank called me again last night. He seems very much ‘in like’ of me. I enjoy his conversation, too. I just hope he knows that there is no real future in our relationship (except maybe an everlasting friendship). I guess there is a possibility for a future together. He is a very nice guy with an innocent personality. I really like talking to him.

I went to bed early (9PM) with QUAKE radio tunes. I was thinking of Frank. He promised me that he would listen to QUAKE radio, so I know he was listening to the same song:  EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE by The Police.

“Everything will be ALL RIGHT in the end…and if it’s NOT all right, trust me; it’s not yet the end!”
-Judi Dench
THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL
2012 motion-picture