Andrew Shaffer

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Born
in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, The United States
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October 2009

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Andrew Shaffer is the New York Times bestselling author of more than a dozen books. He lives with his wife, novelist Tiffany Reisz, in Lexington, Kentucky, where he teaches at the non-profit Carnegie Center for Literacy and Learning.

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Andrew Shaffer Hello, Dorothy. That's an easy question to answer. Yes, I will be your BFF. Best Fox Friends. We'll watch Fox News together, every day and night.…moreHello, Dorothy. That's an easy question to answer. Yes, I will be your BFF. Best Fox Friends. We'll watch Fox News together, every day and night. We'll never stop. O'Reilly, that one white lady, that other white lady--we'll watch them all, consuming their every word with the appetite of Rush Limbaugh at a pill party. Hey...hey--where are you going? Come back! I thought we were going to be BFFs... :((less)
Average rating: 3.56 · 15,928 ratings · 3,758 reviews · 32 distinct worksSimilar authors
Hope Never Dies (Obama Bide...

3.56 avg rating — 5,174 ratings — published 2018 — 8 editions
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Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

3.48 avg rating — 2,030 ratings — published 2012
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How to Survive a Sharknado ...

3.58 avg rating — 567 ratings — published 2014 — 7 editions
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Great Philosophers Who Fail...

3.49 avg rating — 525 ratings — published 2011 — 6 editions
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Literary Rogues: A Scandalo...

3.55 avg rating — 496 ratings — published 2013 — 4 editions
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Fifty Shames of Earl Grey

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3.32 avg rating — 3,322 ratings — published 2012 — 23 editions
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The Day of the Donald: Trum...

3.58 avg rating — 105 ratings — published 2016 — 6 editions
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Ain't Got Time to Bleed: Me...

3.47 avg rating — 17 ratings
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It's Beginning to Look a Lo...

3.78 avg rating — 18 ratings — published 2014 — 5 editions
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Obama/Biden Mysteries (2 Bo...

2.40 avg rating — 5 ratings
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More books by Andrew Shaffer…
Hope Never Dies Hope Rides Again: An Obama ...
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3.56 avg rating — 5,153 ratings

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Crooked House
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Andrew’s Recent Updates

The Bug Book by Edward Gorey
" Somebody got bit by the Gorey bug! "
The CEO's Unexpected Child by Andrea Laurence
" That baby gonna be rich! "
Andrew Shaffer liked that Lisa entered a giveaway
American Heroin by Melissa Scrivner Love
American Heroin
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Black Panther, Book 1 by Ta-Nehisi Coates
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The CEO's Unexpected Child by Andrea Laurence
" That baby gonna throw up on his suit "
Catwoman Vol. 1 by Joëlle Jones
" But the art! I love the art. "
Andrew Shaffer wants to read 175 books in the 2019 Reading Challenge
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He has read 16 books toward his goal of 175 books.
 
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Andrew Shaffer liked that Kemper has completed the 2018 Reading Challenge
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More of Andrew's books…
“I like my tea like I like my men,” I say. With the last name “Grey.” But I realize that’s too forward, so I add, “Black.”

He raises an eyebrow.

“I mean, not that I exclusively like black men,” I say, trying to recover. “I like other kinds of tea. And men.”

“Have you ever tasted...white tea, Anna?”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“As I brush my long, brown hair, the girl in the mirror with blue eyes too big for her head stares back at me. Wait...I don’t have blue eyes! Then I realize I haven’t been looking into the mirror. I’ve been staring at a poster of Kristen Stewart for five minutes. My own hair is actually fine.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“My shift isn’t over until six,” I say glumly.

“Hold on,” he says. He pulls a Blackberry from his coat pocket and taps out a text. It buzzes, and he taps out another text before stashing it back in his pocket. “I think you can take the rest of the afternoon off.”

“I only have a week left, but my boss would kill me,” I say.

“I’m your boss, Anna.”

“What do you mean?”

There’s that smile again, the one with all those teeth. “I just bought Walmart,” he says.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

Topics Mentioning This Author

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“You can never be wise and be in love at the same time.”
Bob Dylan

“I like my tea like I like my men,” I say. With the last name “Grey.” But I realize that’s too forward, so I add, “Black.”

He raises an eyebrow.

“I mean, not that I exclusively like black men,” I say, trying to recover. “I like other kinds of tea. And men.”

“Have you ever tasted...white tea, Anna?”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“My shift isn’t over until six,” I say glumly.

“Hold on,” he says. He pulls a Blackberry from his coat pocket and taps out a text. It buzzes, and he taps out another text before stashing it back in his pocket. “I think you can take the rest of the afternoon off.”

“I only have a week left, but my boss would kill me,” I say.

“I’m your boss, Anna.”

“What do you mean?”

There’s that smile again, the one with all those teeth. “I just bought Walmart,” he says.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“No man is an island,” he says. “Islands are made of dirt and rocks and trees. I don’t know any people made of such things. Therefore, people are not islands.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“As I brush my long, brown hair, the girl in the mirror with blue eyes too big for her head stares back at me. Wait...I don’t have blue eyes! Then I realize I haven’t been looking into the mirror. I’ve been staring at a poster of Kristen Stewart for five minutes. My own hair is actually fine.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

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For readers from Lexington, Kentucky. Discuss what you're reading with your neighbors!
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A group for fans of Tiffany Reisz's work. This is a place to discuss the books and characters. Together we can countdown to the next book and share th ...more
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message 3: by Rita

Rita Jett Thanks for friend requesting. Am a fan.
Slugging through fifty shades of shit right now, but looking forward to checking out your parody ebook! Best with everything :)


Andrew Shaffer I voted for you too! ;)


Delilah Marvelle Hey Andrew boy! I'm totally shocked we weren't already friends. Thanks for fixing that :)


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