Andrew Shaffer

Goodreads Author


Born
in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, The United States
Website

Genre

Influences

Member Since
October 2009

URL


Andrew Shaffer is the New York Times bestselling author of more than a dozen books. He lives with his wife, novelist Tiffany Reisz, in Louisville, Kentucky, where he teaches at Lexington's non-profit Carnegie Center for Literacy and Learning and Louisville Literary Arts. ...more

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Andrew Shaffer There is nothing you can do. You'll have to leave him. And the cat. Leave the cat.…moreThere is nothing you can do. You'll have to leave him. And the cat. Leave the cat.(less)
Andrew Shaffer Hello, Dorothy. That's an easy question to answer. Yes, I will be your BFF. Best Fox Friends. We'll watch Fox News together, every day and night. We'l…moreHello, Dorothy. That's an easy question to answer. Yes, I will be your BFF. Best Fox Friends. We'll watch Fox News together, every day and night. We'll never stop. O'Reilly, that one white lady, that other white lady--we'll watch them all, consuming their every word with the appetite of Rush Limbaugh at a pill party. Hey...hey--where are you going? Come back! I thought we were going to be BFFs... :((less)
Average rating: 3.54 · 31,724 ratings · 6,052 reviews · 36 distinct worksSimilar authors
Hope Never Dies (Obama Bide...

3.50 avg rating — 11,987 ratings — published 2018 — 12 editions
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Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

3.53 avg rating — 6,352 ratings — published 2012
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Hope Rides Again (Obama Bid...

3.63 avg rating — 2,035 ratings — published 2019 — 10 editions
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Secret Santa

3.56 avg rating — 1,266 ratings — published 2020 — 5 editions
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How to Survive a Sharknado ...

3.58 avg rating — 660 ratings — published 2014 — 7 editions
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Literary Rogues: A Scandalo...

3.53 avg rating — 611 ratings — published 2013 — 5 editions
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Great Philosophers Who Fail...

3.49 avg rating — 605 ratings — published 2011 — 7 editions
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Fifty Shames of Earl Grey

by
3.31 avg rating — 3,682 ratings — published 2012 — 24 editions
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The Day of the Donald: Trum...

3.47 avg rating — 179 ratings — published 2016 — 8 editions
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Let's See Them Poems

3.82 avg rating — 67 ratings — published 2020 — 2 editions
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More books by Andrew Shaffer…
Hope Never Dies Hope Rides Again
(2 books)
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3.52 avg rating — 14,019 ratings

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Andrew’s Recent Updates

X-Force by Benjamin Percy, Vol. 2 by Benjamin Percy
" Someone needs to do something about these muties. They’re out of control. "
Andrew Shaffer is now following
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Devolution by Max Brooks
" I can't believe the government is covering up this massacre. ...more "
Whereabouts by Jhumpa Lahiri
" Hey, "Sun Also Rises" also features Depressed Guy Drinking. ...more "
Five Decembers by James Kestrel
" Reading it now, it's really well done...if a little strange that the author, who's already well-established, went with a pen name here. ...more "
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More of Andrew's books…
“I like my tea like I like my men,” I say. With the last name “Grey.” But I realize that’s too forward, so I add, “Black.”

He raises an eyebrow.

“I mean, not that I exclusively like black men,” I say, trying to recover. “I like other kinds of tea. And men.”

“Have you ever tasted...white tea, Anna?”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“As I brush my long, brown hair, the girl in the mirror with blue eyes too big for her head stares back at me. Wait...I don’t have blue eyes! Then I realize I haven’t been looking into the mirror. I’ve been staring at a poster of Kristen Stewart for five minutes. My own hair is actually fine.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“My shift isn’t over until six,” I say glumly.

“Hold on,” he says. He pulls a Blackberry from his coat pocket and taps out a text. It buzzes, and he taps out another text before stashing it back in his pocket. “I think you can take the rest of the afternoon off.”

“I only have a week left, but my boss would kill me,” I say.

“I’m your boss, Anna.”

“What do you mean?”

There’s that smile again, the one with all those teeth. “I just bought Walmart,” he says.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

Topics Mentioning This Author

“You can never be wise and be in love at the same time.”
Bob Dylan

“I like my tea like I like my men,” I say. With the last name “Grey.” But I realize that’s too forward, so I add, “Black.”

He raises an eyebrow.

“I mean, not that I exclusively like black men,” I say, trying to recover. “I like other kinds of tea. And men.”

“Have you ever tasted...white tea, Anna?”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“My shift isn’t over until six,” I say glumly.

“Hold on,” he says. He pulls a Blackberry from his coat pocket and taps out a text. It buzzes, and he taps out another text before stashing it back in his pocket. “I think you can take the rest of the afternoon off.”

“I only have a week left, but my boss would kill me,” I say.

“I’m your boss, Anna.”

“What do you mean?”

There’s that smile again, the one with all those teeth. “I just bought Walmart,” he says.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“No man is an island,” he says. “Islands are made of dirt and rocks and trees. I don’t know any people made of such things. Therefore, people are not islands.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

“As I brush my long, brown hair, the girl in the mirror with blue eyes too big for her head stares back at me. Wait...I don’t have blue eyes! Then I realize I haven’t been looking into the mirror. I’ve been staring at a poster of Kristen Stewart for five minutes. My own hair is actually fine.”
Andrew Shaffer, Fifty-one Shades: A Parody

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A place where all Goodreads members can work together to improve the Goodreads book catalog. Non-librarians are welcome to join the group as well, to ...more
106283 MARK TWAIN SOCIETY — 32 members — last activity Dec 02, 2013 08:11PM
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain A candid discussion of books and reviews in the YA/NA/Romance genres. A saf ...more
72511 Sinners & Sirens - A Tiffany Reisz Fan Club — 868 members — last activity Apr 01, 2019 01:41PM
Do you love the works of Tiffany Reisz? Can't get enough of her brand of edgy, alluring erotica and BDSM? Then this is the place for you. ...more
31471 THE Group for Authors! — 11851 members — last activity 5 hours, 22 min ago
This is a group for authors to discuss their craft, as well as publishing and book marketing.
35109 Debut Author Panel Discussion and Q&A — 177 members — last activity Oct 28, 2020 04:14AM
From July 12 to July 18, these authors will be discussing their experiences as debut fiction authors. Each day, they will tackle a different question ...more
18164 WORD Book Club — 153 members — last activity Oct 01, 2012 04:07PM
For book lovers who participate in WORD's monthly book club, at our store in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. ...more
40208 Bookalicious — 47 members — last activity Aug 08, 2011 08:30PM
The Bookalicious blog appears in Erica Ehm's awesome ezine Yummy Mummy Club. Wanda Lynne Young aka Bookalicious loves to share good reads and great gi ...more
51803 Lexington Reads — 613 members — last activity Feb 16, 2021 04:42PM
For readers from Lexington, Kentucky. Discuss what you're reading with your neighbors! ...more
72551 The Original Sinners Book Club — 343 members — last activity Aug 10, 2014 05:24PM
A group for fans of Tiffany Reisz's work. This is a place to discuss the books and characters. Together we can countdown to the next book and share th ...more
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message 3: by Rita

Rita Jett Thanks for friend requesting. Am a fan.
Slugging through fifty shades of shit right now, but looking forward to checking out your parody ebook! Best with everything :)


Andrew Shaffer I voted for you too! ;)


Delilah Marvelle Hey Andrew boy! I'm totally shocked we weren't already friends. Thanks for fixing that :)


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