Rob Smyth's Blog, page 118
January 24, 2020
South Africa v England: rain delays start of fourth Test – live!
9.22am GMT
Great news from the Bullring! The rain has stopped & ground staff are working hard to give us a match as soon as possible. #SAvENG pic.twitter.com/1Icm9HBn24
The outfield is still pretty wet. But if there’s no more rain - and that’s an iffy if - I suspect we’ll get play within a couple of hours.
9.20am GMT
“Hello Rob,” says Geoff Wignall. “Much as I enjoy your OBOs, getting paid to sit in London to watch it rain in Johannesburg, while engaging in online chat largely focused on fantasy, reminiscence and hope doesn’t add great weight to all the ‘please give the Guardian some money’ popups. (I know - it’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta ...) Not that I’m in any way jealous.”
Even an OBO writer needs to eat, and bread ‘n’ spread doesn’t come cheap these days. Maybe I should start my own blog for OBOs and 20,000-word pieces on B&H Cup games from the 1990s. Never mind the brand, just give me £10 a year.
9.15am GMT
If there is play today, it’ll be fascinating to see what happens at the toss. I’m sure South Africa will bowl, as it gives them the best chance of winning the game. England only need a draw, however, so they’ll be tempted to take the less risky option of batting first.
9.10am GMT
“Knee deep in Derrida at the moment so writing bigly on the transcendental signified,” says Pete Salmon. “Feel like that’s what Hameed is for England now - that thing outside the system that allows the system to function. In this case an imagined future world-beating English team, which always features him. Was it Baudelaire who wrote ‘God is the only being who, in order to rule, does not even need to exist’? I think it was.”
9.05am GMT
Well I never department
The covers are coming off at the Wanderers...
8.55am GMT
It was different in those days, part 313214235234982349238
This’s week Spin, written by Simon Burnton, is a cracking read on England’s first Test tour - the trip to Australia in 1876-77.
Related: The Spin | England’s first Test tour: death, brawling, betting and cross-dressing
8.44am GMT
“Remember when West Brom had that run of managers - Johnny, Ronnie, John, Ron, Ronnie, Ron, Johnny, Nobby, Ron, Ron?” asks Ian Forth. “First Test Australia 2021: Denly, Roy, Vince, Root, Bairstow, Buttler, Archer, Anderson, Leach, Ball, Ormond. Or, if you prefer: Joe, Jason, James, Joe, Jonny, Jos, Jofra, Jimmy, Jack, Jake, Jimmy. I mean, Jimmy Ormond might need to get into some light training next week, but I’ve seen worse teams take the field in Brisbane.”
8.44am GMT
“If you’re very bored during the rain break,” says Steve Pye, “I wondered if this might interest you. It’s an old blog of mine on the Silk Cut Challenge for all rounders that took place between 1984-87. An interesting concept, it might not have answered the debate regarding who was the best all rounder in the game during the 80s, but it certainly made World of Sport a bit more exciting.”
You had me at ‘old blog’. Who says you can’t give an old blog new hits?
8.37am GMT
“I like the look of your fantasy England team,” says Andrew Cosgrove. “I was surprised to see that Michael Holding qualifies for England now. I would have thought he was getting on a bit, but that presumably accounts for him bowling spin now.”
8.23am GMT
“Morning Rob,” says David Horn. “I love that you still hold on to the notion of the wonderfully poised, elegant, wise-beyond-his-years Hameed opening the batting too. I share similar dreams. I’m hoping that his new county turn him into some kind of Kloppian mentality monster and he bangs out the centuries all through April. Any word on where/how he is wintering? Part of my fantasy is that he’s racking up runs in Sydney grade cricket and then putting out bush fires after close of play.”
None at all, I’m afraid, but I can exclusively revel that he turned 23 last week, so he has plenty of time. At that age, I hadn’t even made my Test debut.
8.12am GMT
No news is bad news Nothing to report. There will be no play before lunch, and possibly none at all today.
In other news, this looks good.
As Australian Cricket faced its greatest test, the world was watching.
You know where this story goes. Find out what it took to get there.#TheTestAmazon streaming March 12 on #AmazonPrimeVideo. pic.twitter.com/KPBuf4t14B
7.35am GMT
Conditions in Johannesburg are very 1999. If there is any play today, both captains will be tempted to bowl first.
Related: The Spin | Remembering when South Africa reduced England to two for four | Rob Smyth
7.33am GMT
Rory Burns is in the Sky studio, his moon boot hidden under the table. He’s such a personable bloke; I reckon he’ll be a good pundit.
7.29am GMT
While it's chucking it down in Johannesburg here's something with Stuart Broad for @guardian_sport on his future and potentially playing another Ashes series https://t.co/fYGPi6XHSj
7.25am GMT
“Morning Rob, morning all,” says Matt Turland. “This England team provides that one thing that fills me with dread: hope. We have the makings of a solid top 3 (+ a bonus spare player) in Burns, Sibley, Crawley and Denly. Our middle order (the supposed best aspect of this team for a few years now) is actually ‘delivering’ with Root, Stokes and only-just-started-so-don’t-put-too-much-pressure-on-him Pope. And the bowlers have variety in both style and experience. Thankfully, spinner and wicketkeeper still cause a few issues so I can’t completely give in to the seductive bestest team ever vibe just yet.”
They are still a long way from having a team that can win a Test in India or Australia, never mind a series, but I agree that these are hopeful times. What’s not to love about watching young players have the time of their lives?
7.20am GMT
“Good morning, Rob,” says Eva Maaten. “well, if the England team hasn’t yet left the hotel, we don’t need to leave our house, 10 minutes away from the Wanderers Stadium, either... Still raining here, it doesn’t look as if it will clear up within the next few minutes. We have our cool bag with provisions ready and are poised to rush out at the first glimpse of the sun. Once the weather gets its act together, it should be a great match - always a wonderful atmosphere at the Bullring.”
And usually a cracking pitch.
7.12am GMT
The word on the street is that both teams will leave out their spinner. And it sounds like England will bring in Chris Woakes and Jofra Archer for Dom Bess and Mark Wood, who has been stiff and sore since his exertions in the third Test. When the match does finally begin around teatime tomorrow, it could be a thrilling dogfight.
7.10am GMT
This is a brilliant piece on the retiring Vernon Philander
The art of subtle. My tribute to @VDP_24 ahead of his last Test. #SAvENG https://t.co/bt3Vey7KJn
7.05am GMT
Weatherwatch The match was scheduled to start at 8am our time, 10am in Jo’burg, but that isn’t going to happen. The England team haven’t left the hotel yet.
6.50am GMT
Good morning and welcome to live coverage of the fourth and final Test between South Africa and England at the Wanderers in Johannesburg. Since England won the third Test on Monday, my subconscious has been shoving one particular TV scene to the front my mind. It’s from The Thick of It special Spinners and Losers, in which the prime minister unexpectedly resigns and everyone starts spinning.
Jamie, the other maniacal Scotsman, picks the absurd Cliff Lawton as his stalking horse. When word gets out and he is ridiculed, Jamie, with recourse to a popular four-letter word, tells Cliff that he’s not going to be prime minister – or, for that matter, anything else.
Raining in Johannesburg at the moment with a rather mixed forecast for the first few days I’m afraid. #bbccricket #SAvENG pic.twitter.com/rzd3DSU1SM
Continue reading...
January 18, 2020
South Africa v England: third Test, day three – as it happened
4.13pm GMT
Related: Dom Bess takes five wickets but rain, drops and South Africa stall England
4.01pm GMT
82nd over: South Africa 208-6 (de Kock 63, Philander 27) With three balls remaining, Bess takes the new ball. It’s a nice idea from Joe Root but doesn’t yield the desired wicket.
That’s the end of a long, rain-affected day’s play. It belonged to Dom Bess, who took his first Test five-for, and Quinton de Kock, whose 95% sublime/5% ridiculous innings of 63 not out gave South Africa a realistic chance of saving the game. He was dropped three times by Ben Stokes, believe it or not.
3.57pm GMT
81st over: South Africa 207-6 (de Kock 63, Philander 26) Joe Denly comes onto to bowl the penultimate over of the day - and Stokes drops a third chance at slip! de Kock tried to cut a big legspinner and sliced it towards Stokes, who couldn’t hold on to a very tough chance by his right ankle. He almost grabbed it at the second attempt - and the third and fourth - before it finally hit the ground.
3.53pm GMT
80th over: South Africa 207-6 (de Kock 63, Philander 26) Philander inside-edges a lovely off-break from Bess onto the pad, with the ball dropping short of the diving Buttler. A maiden.
3.50pm GMT
79th over: South Africa 207-6 (de Kock 63, Philander 26)
3.47pm GMT
78th over: South Africa 205-6 (de Kock 62, Philander 25) Bess gives the ball a bit more air to de Kock. He resists the temptation and settles for a no-risk single off the final delivery.
3.45pm GMT
77th over: South Africa 204-6 (de Kock 61, Philander 25) South Africa continue to bat comfortably. A wicket before the close would be such a bonus for England because there is no sense that one is about to fall.
3.41pm GMT
76th over: South Africa 201-6 (de Kock 59, Philander 24) After another quiet over, Bess has figures of 28-11-49-5. A spinner would be happy with those in the first innings of any Test match anywhere in the world.
3.39pm GMT
75th over: South Africa 200-6 (de Kock 58, Philander 24) A maiden from Root to Philander. England are racing through the overs; seven to go.
3.37pm GMT
74th over: South Africa 200-6 (de Kock 58, Philander 24) More solid defence from Philander, who has settled down after that flying start to the innings. A single off Bess’s final delivery brings up the 200. South Africa, who were 113 for five when rain stopped play this morning, have batted extremely well since the resumption.
3.34pm GMT
73rd over: South Africa 199-6 (de Kock 58, Philander 23) The light has deteriorated, so England have no choice but to bowl spin at both ends. Joe Root thus replaces Stuart Broad - and he has de Kock dropped again by Stokes at slip! Oh my, what a chance. de Kock played a really loose stroke at a ball that bounced more than he expected. It took the edge and looped towards slip, where Stokes failed to hang on with his outtstretched left hand. It was a pretty straightforward chance, certainly for Stokes. I suspect he was deceived by the lack of pace.
3.30pm GMT
72nd over: South Africa 197-6 (de Kock 56, Philander 23) Bess switches round the wicket to the right-hander Philander, who gets an inside-edge onto the pad that loops up and lands safely.
3.27pm GMT
71st over: South Africa 197-6 (de Kock 56, Philander 23) Stuart Broad replaces Stokes, who bowled a mixed spell of 5-1-26-1. Quinton de Kock treats him as he has all the other England seamers, driving delightfully through mid-on for four. He has played outrageously well.
3.22pm GMT
70th over: South Africa 193-6 (de Kock 52, Philander 23) I think England have done really well to pick up six wickets in 70 overs, because this pitch is so unhelpful. There are 12 overs remaining tonight, although I suspect bad light will stop play in the next 15-20 minutes.
3.19pm GMT
69th over: South Africa 193-6 (de Kock 52, Philander 23) Philander pulls Stokes round the corner for four, with the ball going straight through Bess on the long leg boundary. Then a push-drive for four takes de Kock to a delicious half-century, his 20th in Tests. Even by his standards, it’s been full of glorious strokes.
3.13pm GMT
68th over: South Africa 184-6 (de Kock 48, Philander 18) Bess replaces Root, who bowled a decent spell of 7-3-18-0 and had de Kock dropped. His first ball is short, wide and scythed for four by de Kock.
3.10pm GMT
67th over: South Africa 180-6 (de Kock 44, Philander 18) “With a lead of roughly 330 as I type, why, when I watch, is there only one slip?” asks Jeremy Deacon.
The logic is that it’s a slow, almost subcontinental pitch, so there is less chance both of the edge being found and of any edges carrying. Most of the catchers are in front of the wicket for mistimed drives and the like. I’d still have at least two slips for Stokes, though.
3.05pm GMT
66th over: South Africa 177-6 (de Kock 41, Philander 18) A delicate drive from Philander beats Broad at mid-off and runs away for four. He always could play - he averages 37 with the bat against England - and he has started superbly in this innings. An emphatic drive through extra cover takes him to 18 from 10 balls. That might be the end of Root’s spell.
3.01pm GMT
65th over: South Africa 167-6 (de Kock 40, Philander 9) Philander gets off the mark with consecutive boundaries off Stokes. The first was a swaggering flick-pull, the second a sweet drive between extra cover and mid-off. A clever leg-glance from de Kock makes it three boundaries in the over, at the end of which Stokes waves his cap in disgust.
2.57pm GMT
64th over: South Africa 154-6 (de Kock 36, Philander 0) South Africa’s big target in this innings is 300, which would ensure England have to bat again. Either way, so much depends on the weather in the next two days.
2.55pm GMT
63rd over: South Africa 154-6 (de Kock 36, Philander 0) Nortje played heroically, eating up 136 balls as nightwatchman. It looks like Stokes and Root waved him off the field, though I’m not sure why.
2.52pm GMT
He’s done it again. Ben Stokes smiles, almost in embarrassment at his Boy’s Own brilliance, after making a vital breakthrough. Nortje was lured into a slightly loose stroke outside off stump, and Joe Root took a seriously good low catch at second slip.
2.44pm GMT
62nd over: South Africa 154-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 36) Root continues. I’d be tempted to try Denly to de Kock, especially after what happened at Cape Town. Root is not bowling badly, though,and gets one to turn sharply past de Kock’s outside edge. Another maiden. That’s drinks.
2.41pm GMT
61st over: South Africa 154-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 36) With England needing a wicket, Ben Stokes puts his cape on for the first time in the innings. His first over is a quiet one, with everything played comfortably by de Kock.
2.36pm GMT
60th over: South Africa 153-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 35) Another harmless over from Root. I suppose this passage of play is a reminder of how well England - or rather Dom Bess - did to pick up the first five wickets so cheaply.
2.34pm GMT
59th over: South Africa 152-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 34) Curran tries something unusual, thrusting his right hand out for no reason in the middle of his run up. Nortje pulls away so Curran has to do it all again, this time without the comedy gamesmanship.
This spell from Curran looks good on paper (4-1-6-0), but he hasn’t really threatened the batsmen. It might be time for Ben Stokes to put his cape on.
Nortje has now faced more balls in this innings than all of South Africa's top three combined. #SAvEng
2.28pm GMT
58th over: South Africa 152-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 34)
2.26pm GMT
57th over: South Africa 150-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 32) Curran switches round the wicket to Nortje, who blocks everything that moves. There are 25 overs remaining tonight.
2.22pm GMT
56th over: South Africa 149-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 31) Oh my, Stokes has dropped de Kock! That came out of nothing. It was a very sharp chance at slip off the bowling of Root, after de Kock played an absent-minded dab off the back foot, and it went through the hands of the crouching Stokes.
2.18pm GMT
55th over: South Africa 144-5 (Nortje 18, de Kock 26) Nortje plays a rare attacking stroke, jumping up to force Curran through the covers for two. It’s all very quiet out there. England haven’t looked like taking a wicket since the resumption.
2.14pm GMT
54th over: South Africa 142-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 26) Joe Root replaces Dom Bess (23-9-43-5), presumably with a view to de Kock doing something rash. Not in that over: he offers a dead, straight bat (comma optional) and it’s a maiden.
“I started out as a journalist Rob,” says Elliot Carr-Barnsley. “I saw the path ahead of me and ran. I now make TV programmes, so... we all make bad decisions.”
2.10pm GMT
53rd over: South Africa 142-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 26) Sam Curran replaces Mark Wood, who was hit out of the attack by de Kock. That’s a smart move from Joe Root as de Kock much prefers pace on the ball. He edges Curran’s first delivery for a couple, all along the floor, and generally struggles to time the ball. A decent start from Curran.
2.06pm GMT
52nd over: South Africa 139-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 23) England have been a bit flat since the resumption, although Nortje and de Kock, in very different ways, have played superbly.
“Personally, I’d always greet a dog walker, if only to acknowledge a fellow sufferer,” says Andy Blamey. “I say this having walked ours home this morning after she’d repeatedly rolled in something spectacularly unpleasant.”
2.02pm GMT
51st over: South Africa 138-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 22) Another majestic stroke from de Kock, who pings a full ball from Wood through midwicket for four. Wood responds with an excellent swinging yorker, yet even that is defended with an ease that verges on the contemptuous.
It takes a special talent to have this much time against a 90-95mph bowler, and de Kock helps himself to another boundary when an exasperated Wood strays onto the pads. Wood conceded 10 runs from his first 9.2 overs. Since then, de Kock has hit him for 20 off 10 balls. Sublime batting.
1.55pm GMT
50th over: South Africa 128-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 13) A thick edge from de Kock runs along the ground for a single. That allows Bess four more balls at Nortje, who blocks the lot.
1.52pm GMT
49th over: South Africa 127-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 12) Wood is driven delightfully through mid-on for four by de Kock. He has so much time to play even the fastest bowling, which he demonstrates again by larruping a cut to the cover boundary. Wood conceded only one boundary in his first 50 balls, and that was an inside edge; de Kock then hit two of the next three for four.
“I’ve never owned a dog (and walking a parrot is just strange),” says Bob O’Hara, “but my impression is that there’s a dog walking subculture, so that you’re more likely to be trending on twitter by 9am if you don’t greet a fellow dog walker. It might be safest to let your dog go to a better home where these social niceties are better understood. Then get a parrot.”
1.46pm GMT
48th over: South Africa 116-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 1) A maiden from Bess to the strokeless Nortje, who is acting as a nightwatchman for the second day in a row. He’s doing an admirable job.
“Rob,” says John Starbuck. “Wasn’t the quote about Aristotle’s view on premature banter the whole foundation of the plot in The Name of the Rose?”
1.43pm GMT
47th over: South Africa 116-5 (Nortje 16, de Kock 1) England would love to take at least one South African with them, ideally de Kock, before rain stops play again. Wood whistles a quite vicious bouncer past Nortje, who actually played it pretty well by snapping his head out of the way. He’s got plenty of moxie, has Nortje: he made a vital 40 from 89 balls as a nightwatchman in the first Test, and here he has batted 95 balls for 16.
“Hi Rob,” says Peter Gluckstein. “Arsenal used to have a youngster called Mark ‘Blocka’ Flatts, which always seemed an advanced option for, well, a footballer...”
1.39pm GMT
46th over: South Africa 115-5 (Nortje 15, de Kock 1) The groundstaff look fidgety, which is bad news for England. A maiden from Bess to de Kock.
“I’m sure I read or heard somewhere, years ago, that Owen Parkin was referred to as ‘Disabled’ by his Glamorgan colleagues (granted, somewhat inappropriate),” says Clare Dowding, “and that Jacques Kallis was known as ‘Scrumpy’ - although that probably says a lot about a) when he was at Glamorgan and b) drinking habits in South Wales at the time. I’m allowed to say that, I was born in Cardiff and brought up in the area.”
1.36pm GMT
45th over: South Africa 115-5 (Nortje 15, de Kock 1) Mark Wood goes straight round the wicket to the nightwatchman Anrich Nortje, who is dropped by Ollie Pope at short leg. It was a really sharp chance, off the face of the bat, and Pope couldn’t hang on.
1.31pm GMT
44th over: South Africa 113-5 (Nortje 14, de Kock 0) Dom Bess bowls the last four balls of the over he started before rain stopped play. Quinton de Kock defends each and every one, and life goes on.
“Two things,” brasstacks Matt Dony. “Firstly, Robert Blanchard has made a colossal, ‘We’re gonna have a bowl’-scale error. If we’re looking at qualification through residency, then omitting the magnificent Tori Amos from his XI is a heinous oversight that might cause me to turn my back on OBOs once and for all. Secondly, we attribute ‘Nature abhors a vacuum’ to Aristotle. Might it have been a mistranslation? Did he actually say, ‘Nature abhors a competent English cricket performance. So enjoy the rain, suckers!’?”
1.28pm GMT
The restart has been delayed by a few minutes: 3.30pm local time. 1.30pm in England.
1.20pm GMT
“John Mallett, bruising Bath and England prop, was always known as ‘Shep’ at The Rec, which was in turn hacked down from the name of a cider-producing town not so far away,” says Jill Shepherd. “He now terrorises coaches and kids as director of Rugby at Millfield School, also not so far way...”
1.13pm GMT
Play will resume at 1.26pm! That’s a helluva turnaround from the groundstaff; well played them. If it doesn’t rain again, we’ll have 39.4 overs tonight. And, no, I haven’t a clue why the restart time is 1.26pm rather than 1.25pm.
1.12pm GMT
A bit of news from India...
Related: Australia eye strongest bowling attack for ODI decider against India
1.11pm GMT
“Barbara Castle should definitely be in the Redheads XI,” says Jacqueline. “Wicketkeeper maybe?”
1.07pm GMT
Elliot Carr-Barnsley has another suggestion for Dom Bess. “Surely, given Bess’s county side and evident world-class status, must be The Apple Kumble.”
When I read that I thought , ‘Ha, that’s nice’. And then a split-second later - if that - a voice in my head screamed, ‘But ‘crumble’ and ‘Kumble’ is only an eye rhyme, it doesn’t work phonetically.’
1.07pm GMT
Thanks for all your nickname suggestions. All the old favourites are there:
1.00pm GMT
“What would happen in event of the game being rained off?” asks Manish Ravala. “Would it be a tie or have there been enough overs for possible Duckworth Lewis?”
It would be a draw, at least under the old laws.
12.52pm GMT
The covers are coming off! You heard. That’s an extremely pleasant surprise, although no time has been set for a resumption.
12.49pm GMT
“Not elaborate,” says James Hodgins, “but one of the best nicknames has to be Monde Zondeki, who was nicknamed ‘All Hands’.”
Yep, that’s a good one. Although shouldn’t it have been ‘All Hand’? Oh for heaven’s sake, I’ve actually become a nickname pedant. This is a low.
12.46pm GMT
It’s raining again. I’d imagine play will be abandoned for the day in the next hour or so. But keep pressing that refresh button, because
I get paid £0.000001p for every page view and I’d love a bit of bread ‘n’ spread tonight
otherwise you might miss a Dom Bess ten-for!
12.43pm GMT
“Hi Rob,” says Matt Emerson. “Given the professional sportsman’s inclination to add a -y to the end of every surname I presume Dom Bess’s nickname is ‘Aunt’.”
On that note, I wonder what’s the most elaborate nickname in sport. Not that ‘Aunt’ is especially elaborate, but it’s two moves from name to nickname rather than the usual one.
12.41pm GMT
“I love a long post-tea session,” cackles Gary Naylor. “What a delight it is to see bowlers and captains who slow the game into 25 overs in the mornings and afternoons try to cope with 40 before they can go off. Comeuppance is the mot juste, I believe. If a captain can’t deliver at least 28 overs in two hours in the absence of major delays, they’re not playing it right.”
I’m loath to be too critical, especially as most mornings it takes me the best part of an hour to decide which playlist to put on in the office. Will it be Britpop 1993-94 or Britpop 1995-97?
12.37pm GMT
“Afternoon Rob,” says Robert Blanchard. “Once again, the OBO and its contributors have been shown up as sexist: all proposals for the ginger cricket team are/were men. Here is my proposal for an all-female team of redheads. I’m sure you will agree it combines leadership, aggression, poise, the ability to keep one’s head, and steady accumulation (scoring 111 is not to be sneezed at). I will brook no argument about their qualifications: Google says they are/were all redheads so it must be true.
12.21pm GMT
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12.16pm GMT
This is a bit more promising. The rain has relented and the groundstaff are milling around, trying to decide what to do next.
12.13pm GMT
“Surely a Tina Turner- inspired nickname: ‘Simply’?” says Tom Pugh. “Because at the moment, he’s Simply Dom Bess.”
You say ‘at the moment’. Does that mean he’ll be Complicatedly Dom Bess in the future?
12.06pm GMT
The covers are back on. I suspect they will stay there until tomorrow morning.
11.55am GMT
Cwicket fwends
A rain break well spent with @StocksC_cricket (and a little help from @Vitu_E) pic.twitter.com/c7WVkrSlea
11.51am GMT
Thanks Tim, hello everyone. England have already secured a moral victory in this match, but an actual win is far from guaranteed. I’d be surprised if we get any more play today, and the forecast for the rest of the match is mixed. At least England, in the parlance of our time, moved the game along in the 25.2 overs that were possible this morning. They are one wicket away from if not the tail then certainly the rump.
11.44am GMT
The rain has gone from cats and dogs to mere drizzle, so there may be hope. Time for me to hand over to Rob Smyth. Thanks for your company, your redhead XIs and your thoughts on how long a piece of cricket should be.
11.37am GMT
A man with a plan. “Following is an amended version of a proposal I have sent to the OBO earlier,” says Abhijato Sensarma. “We should take a fifteen-minutes break at the end of the third session, and return for a ‘fourth session’ during each playing day of a Test match. The first three can be shorter in duration (24 overs each) to ensure the same amount of significant play happens in the fourth one, with the players recharged and at the top of their games more frequently than what a Test’s current format allows. The presence of this ‘fourth session’ will contribute to more dynamic passages of play tactics, and help the players stay energised, especially during times of extreme weather. Thoughts?” Interesting idea, but have you ever been to a Test, Abhijato? The 20 minutes of the tea interval are too little to get to he front of the queue for a cup of tea, let alone go to the bathroom as well. So it’s hard to see 15 being much use to anyone. A fourth session, though, is well worth thinking about: the third session is often uncomfortably long, as we may find this afternoon.
11.30am GMT
“Does anyone know,” asks John Starbuck, “if Bess already has a nickname, either from school or his county? I’d have thought he should be known as ‘Good Queen’, with a soundtrack of a Brian May guitar solo.”
11.24am GMT
A thought from John Galpin. “One thing I haven’t heard mentioned in the 4 vs 5 day Test debate is the impact of the weather such as we have now. Where would this match probably be headed if this was the third day of four? It will become far easier for teams on the wrong end of a drubbing to play out for a draw. Personally I expect that far more Tests will end up as a draw, rain or light stopped play or not. Do we really want that? On the other hand it may push teams to keep up a higher scoring rate than say England did here on the first day. But to me that’s part of the magic of 5 day Tests. It enables a longer term strategy to play out and really tests the mental and physical mettle of the two opponents. That’s what makes Test cricket one of the greatest ‘all round’ sporting contests there are.” Very true.
Now that Sourav Ganguly has come out against them in his capacity as president of the BCCI, it looks as if mandatory four-dayers are dead in the water. I suspect we’re heading for a mixture, which, technically, is what we have now. There will be more four-day Tests, but still plenty of places where the full five-act drama lives on.
11.15am GMT
Not that we’re done with the redheads yet. “Morning, Tim,” says Phil Sawyer. “Anyone putting together an England red-head eleven and not including the legend that is Glen Chapple is going to incur my ire. Alright, yes, technically he never played a Test for England, but that’s an injustice that I only bring up four or five times a day.”
11.10am GMT
Back to the Pope and Bess show. “Hello, fellow Tim,” says Tim Sanders in Leeds. Always good to meet one. “If at a tangent from the religious theme, we can adapt the Gershwins and Heywards to give us ‘Bess, You Is My Spinner Now’, ‘I Loves You Popey’, whilst Somerset fans might mourn his absence on Test duty with ‘Bess, O Where’s My Bess?’” That’s absence from the 2nd XI, presumably.
11.04am GMT
“As a South African who’s lived in England for a long time,” says Matthew Kentridge, “I don’t know whether to laugh or cry at the state of this Test match. However, when it came to Rabada’s face, yesterday evening, as Pope scooped him backwards over his head for six, more or less with his eyes closed, there was no contest – I had to laugh. I was afraid Rabada would burst a blood vessel with the effort of keeping his mouth shut. Hope the weather clears up, but that Eastern Province rain has been known to settle in and spoil a good day’s cricket, not to mention a good holiday.” Lovely to have a bit of local knowledge, especially when it comes from my next-door neighbour in London. We got him as a Kolpak, obviously.
11.00am GMT
We interrupt this rain break to bring you more on red hair and the passing of time. “Ben Heywood (10.24) seemed down on his brown,” says Nick Killick, “but he’s revealed the great blessing of redheads – generally we transition to another colour before the grey sets in – in my case a bit blonde. We may suffer in the playground, but by middle age our revenge is being served very cold on our white-haired persecutors from youth.” Nice. And nobody ever wrote a headline about a brown-haired ninja.
10.57am GMT
“For inclusion in your red-headed team,” says Steve Hudson. “KP and Jimmy both had red streaks at some point, so they qualify by ... residence, or something?” Ha. In my memory, KP’s streak was blue, but then my memory is hazy from around the time Pat Pocock made his exit.
10.34am GMT
“Pat Pocock,” says Kim Thonger, “was a classic example of face not fitting. I remember his first sixfer. Elegant and interesting bowler, but the selectors were so incompetent at the time that they’d pick almost any other bowler ahead of him. He managed only 25 Tests in 17 years. These were the same selectors who routinely ignored Tom Cartwright. I’m still very cross with them fifty years later.” Great stuff. And yes, Percy Pocock was hard done by. But wasn’t it partly the fact that Ray Illingworth became captain, and he was an off-spinner too? And then Tony Greig took up off-breaks and bagged 14 wickets in a match. At least Pocock had an Indian summer, turning up as a golden oldie in David Gower’s team that went to India in 1984-85 and won. And then he was harshly dropped again, for John Emburey, who came straight back in after a ban, bearing his superior batting and a dismal strike rate.
10.26am GMT
“It’s lashing down,” says Ian Ward on Sky, and the camera pans around to show that, yes, Port Elizabeth has turned into Old Trafford.
10.24am GMT
Back to the serious stuff. “Speaking as a former redhead,” says Ben Heywood, “it can go one of two ways – it can all fall out (can’t think of anyone this has happened to, ahem), or the ginge tinge turns grey, white or in my case, weirdly, brown. My younger son (carrots) didn’t believe I was a ginger until I inadvisedly showed him some old pictures. Now he thinks I used to look like Ronald McDonald.”
10.21am GMT
Even this weather may be on England’s side. “Might a rain-interrupted day with perhaps an early finish be of benefit to England,” wonders Geoff Wignall. “Assuming they manage to take the remaining first-innings wickets or at least most of them? I’m thinking of course of an enforced follow-on with the bowlers sufficiently fresh and well rested.” Poor old Faf: it never rains, but it pours.
10.18am GMT
Anything Pope can do, Bess can do almost as well. No sooner has Pope become the youngest right-hander to make a Test century for England since 1954 (the early days of Colin Cowdrey), than Bess becomes the youngest English spinner to take a Test five-for since 1968, when Pat Pocock grabbed six for 79 against Australia at the age of 21. Hat-tip to Cricinfo, full list here.
10.12am GMT
“From Bangkok on a boozy afternoon,” says Mike Brady. I’m not sure if that’s the most promising start to an OBO email ever, or the most worrying. “Obviously Stokes is God, and he has a Pope, but how should we worship Bess?” As the new leader of the Dominicans, following a brief stint from Dom Sibley.
10.07am GMT
“Lovely scoreboard to wake up to,” says Kim Thonger. “I wonder if there’s a winning formula for future England home Tests? Prepare pitches for spin and select an attack of Bess, Leach, Rashid and Moeen, backed up by pace variation from Curran and Stokes. And possibly play all home Tests at Taunton.” Hang on, what about Wood? He’s just taken one of the all-time great none-fors.
10.05am GMT
“A very good morning Tim.” You can say that again, Brian Withington. “Just catching up with this morning’s OBO, not knowing who was on duty, when my heart lifted at the sight of a Norwegian Wood lyric casually yet deftly inserted into proceedings (over 34). Could I have safely addressed this email without even checking who was responsible?” Oh I don’t know – some of my colleagues have come across this old beat combo too. “What would you give to have penned the original lyric?” That is a good question. Only last Saturday, I heard Judy Collins sing it in Liverpool, bringing an 80-year-old’s elegance to bear on John Lennon’s youthful audacity.
9.58am GMT
“Root’s drop,” says the subject line of an email from George Wigley. “Great captaincy from Root: he wants Bess’s five-for to be top order, unsullied by tail enders. The foresight!”
9.53am GMT
Mid-44th over: South Africa 113-5 (Nortje 14, de Kock 0) The rain gets heavy quite quickly, like a conversation about your love life. The umpires take the players off and signal an early lunch. The morning belongs to Dom Bess, with a little help from Ollie Pope – just a couple of 22-year-olds, living the dream.
“Just woken (Well, it IS Saturday) and checked in,” said Adam Goves, “in sleepy Norfolk”, a quarter of an hour ago. “Surely Bess could have parried that C&B to Pope?! It’s totally messed up the aesthetic of an otherwise perfect scorecard, or am I being a bit greedy?”
9.47am GMT
43rd over: South Africa 113-5 (Nortje 14, de Kock 0) Denly is still on, and still collecting dots, though he does dish up one bad ball which Nortje dispatches through midwicket. Bad news, lads: rain is falling.
9.44am GMT
42nd over: South Africa 109-5 (Nortje 10, de Kock 0) So the best day of Pope’s career has been followed by the best day of Bess’s. Amazing stuff. For the good of the game, we could now do with a scintillating counter-attack from de Kock.
9.40am GMT
Dom Bess gets his five-for! Not his best ball, short and wide, but it turns enough to take the inside edge as van der Dussen shapes to cut. Bess has five for 41, and Joe Root no longer has to feel bad about that drop.
9.37am GMT
41st over: South Africa 109-4 (Nortje 10, van der Dussen 24) One batsman’s aggression infects the other as Nortje cuts Denly for his first four and reaches double figures off his 81st ball. At this rate, he’ll be 42 not out when South Africa secure the draw on Monday night.
9.35am GMT
40th over: South Africa 103-4 (Nortje 6, van der Dussen 23) Out of nowhere, van der Dussen tucks into Bess. A lofted on-drive for four, a force into the covers for two, a slog-sweep for four more, and then, with the field in sudden retreat, an easy single. Is this a change in the weather?
9.32am GMT
39th over: South Africa 93-4 (Nortje 6, van der Dussen 12) Spin from both ends! Bess’s Laker finds his Lock in the form of Joe Denly. who took his first Test wickets in Cape Town. He makes a tidy start, going for just a single.
9.29am GMT
38th over: South Africa 92-4 (Nortje 6, van der Dussen 11) The scoreboard is suddenly rocking, but only because a big turner from Bess goes for four byes.
“An English red-headed XI?” says Ian Forth. “Bell, Crawley Z, Collingwood, Bairstow J, Morgan (captain), Pope, Stokes, Bairstow D (wkpr), Batty, Sidebottom A, Sidebottom R. 12th man: Fairbrother.” Combustible but effective.
9.24am GMT
37th over: South Africa 88-4 (Nortje 6, van der Dussen 11) Nortje, after making three off 66 balls, sensationally doubles his score with a leg glance off Broad.
“The Smarmy Army,” muses Peter Gingold (26th over). “Nice idea. But, sad to say, they’d have to stay in the UK on account of emissions from international flights.”
9.20am GMT
36th over: South Africa 84-4 (Nortje 3, van der Dussen 10) Bess’s arm ball kisses the edge as Nortje goes back and Root, at slip, spills a simple chance. Bess responds with no more than a rueful grimace, which is big of him given that that should have been his first Test five-for.
Here’s David Winter in Paris, questioning the very process of the OBO. “Are you live reporting on the third Test from the press box in Port Elizabeth, in the newsroom at Guardian HQ whilst surrounded by dynamic colleagues breaking news stories from around the world, or are you sat in your pants on your sofa at home?” That would be telling.
9.15am GMT
35th over: South Africa 83-4 (Nortje 3, van der Dussen 9) Broad tries a bouncer. Nortje faces the music, gets the splice on it, and would give a simple catch to short leg if Pope wasn’t so deep.
9.13am GMT
34th over: South Africa 83-4 (Nortje 3, van der Dussen 9) Nortje takes a single off Bess, who is now coming round the wicket, and van der Dussen plays the first attacking stroke since du Plessis. And it’s a very good one – a dance down the track and a clean hard hit past mid-on.
“Morning Tim.” Morning, Diana Powell. “What a magnificent bird on the photograph of the ground. What is it? Does it take catches on the boundary?” That bird has flown, alas – though perhaps somebody spotted it and can answer the question. All the time I should have spent with Observer’s Book of Birds went into Wisden.
9.06am GMT
33rd over: South Africa 78-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 5) This collapse began with a caught-and-bowled and Broad comes close to another one as van der Dussen is deceived by a leg-cutter. And that’s drinks, with England so dominant that it’s hard to believe.
Matthew Doherty has a question. “Has this Test secretly been re-allocated to Old Trafford 1956?” It’s true that Bess is in with a chance of being both Laker and Lock here. According to our friends at Cricinfo, he’s the first England spinner to take four wickets in the first 25 overs of a Test innings since Graeme Swann at Cardiff in 2011. But that was a second innings, and it didn’t even last 25 overs.
9.00am GMT
32nd over: South Africa 78-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 5) Bess keeps it tight as van der Dussen clips to midwicket for a single and Nortje blocks his way to 50 (balls).
“Well,” says Richard Mansell, “if one is South African this is as depressing as it must be exhilarating for England fans. It looks like we are heading for an innings defeat.” I realise that words of comfort from an Englishman may only make things worse, but ... Long way to go, and that rain has to come along some time.
8.56am GMT
31st over: South Africa 77-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 4) Broad has two short covers and no fine leg, so they might as well be in Sri Lanka already. He breaks off from bowling cutters to present Nortje with a lovely inswinger, which very nearly clips the off bail.
8.53am GMT
30th over: South Africa 77-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 4) Anrich Nortje keeps Bess out and nicks a single off the last ball. He’s now faced 39 balls, more than anyone else in this innings except Elgar.
“Morning Tim,” says David Horn, “and what a fine one it’s turning out to be. Was wondering how Matt Parkinson might be feeling? Dom Bess wasn’t even in the original squad. Are we picking leg spinners for a tour just for the craic? I’m assuming he’s heading for the door marked ‘Mason Crane’ about now.” Ha, you’d be spot-on if there wasn’t a tour of Sri Lanka next. Parkinson will presumably be there unless Adil Rashid finds a miracle cure for his shoulder.
8.47am GMT
29th over: South Africa 76-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 4) By playing noticeably straight, van der Dussen deals better with Broad and picks up another two.
“Good morning from Port Elizabeth,” said Piet Morant, half an hour ago. “Looking forward to your fine commentary, especially since I turned down tickets at work from my colleague Alan when I saw how likely it was to rain, hour on hour [Preamble, below]. He was sure the rain would not come until this evening, but said you can’t count on the forecasters. ‘No, Alan, you can’t!’ Now he’s at the ground and I’m stuck at home with my windy dog.” As Rob Smyth would say: ach, sorry.
8.44am GMT
28th over: South Africa 74-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 2) Another maiden from Bess, who has 11-4-22-4 and has surely inked his name into the tour party for Sri Lanka.
8.42am GMT
27th over: South Africa 74-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 2) Mark Wood takes a break to rest on Bess’s laurels. Stuart Broad enters the fray and almost joins in the fun as Rassie van der Dussen, flummoxed by a cutter, chips into the covers, not far from Joe Denly.
8.40am GMT
26th over: South Africa 72-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 0) Bess whistles through a maiden to Nortje, with scarcely a thought for people trying to write OBOs.
“Looking forward to a great day,” wrote Leo a couple of wickets ago. “Meanwhile... ‘not even Jerusalem dampens the excitement’? [08:02] So what do we really think of the Barmy Army? Did I also detect a slight world-weariness creeping into the OBO yesterday as whoever was writing suggested he or she was somewhat unbeguiled by the continued carryings-on of the Crazy Corps? Has what started so many years ago as a slightly self-deprecatory unit of hard-core England supporters willing to brave the rigours of sometimes challenging foreign travel developed into something that, instead, now rather prominently displays elements of the Great British psyche perhaps better kept at home? And, if so, what can be done?
“Last night I had a dream... that, as an antidote, we Guardian Readers started to consider organising a small rival force of travelling supporters that will go out of their way to show another side of the English character. A group that will aim to ingratiate themselves with the host nation, cheering rather than denigrating the opposition at every opportunity, backing wholeheartedly the umpires’ adjudications, and taking care to compliment the ground staff on preparing such superb wickets! Who knows, taking the lead from the delightful Japanese World Cup fans a couple of years ago, this newly Regenerated Regiment could even stick around to help clean up the stadium after the day’s play. Come on, Guardian Readers! Why not?! After, of course, each of us has dutifully subscribed and contributed to the paper proper, let us join together to form our own brand of more ‘woke’ and enlightened supportership, We could do it! Come on! Let’s hear it for The Guardian’s own Smarmy Army.”
8.34am GMT
25th over: South Africa 72-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 0) The nightwatchman is in danger of ending up not out here. Nortje almost falls to Wood, fending close to the inevitable Pope at short leg, but then plays a wily tuck that gets him off the mark, and, more importantly, up the other end. Wood has the unlikely figures of 7-4-7-0. He has been far more threatening than Bess, but the pitch is on Bess’s side, and so are the gods.
“On the pop quiz question [22nd over],” says Alex Bramble, “it has to be the stylistically contrasting David Ivon Gower and Alastair Nathan Cook.” We have a winner. “And,” he goes on, “I’m struggling to contain my enthusiasm about Pope; I haven’t felt this excited since, well, Joe Root, and Iron Bell before that (and yes it looks like Pope deserves such exalted comparisons!).” It does.
8.29am GMT
24th over: South Africa 71-4 (Nortje 0, van der Dussen 0) Faf had actually started well, dancing down the track to off-drive Bess for four, then repeating the trick next ball. But Bess stuck at it and got lucky. Poor old South Africa – they’re making England’s youngest players look like world-beaters.
8.26am GMT
Another one! Another big one! Faf du Plessis tucks Bess round the corner, where the unstoppable Pope pops up to take a simpler catch at square short leg. Dom Bess has FOUR FOR 22. The world has gone completely mad.
8.21am GMT
23rd over: South Africa 63-3 (Nortje 0, du Plessis 0) Another maiden from Wood, who seems to be adding parsimony to his arsenal. If he could just stay fit, he might well be England’s Mitchell Johnson.
“I know this is so yesterday,” says James Gladstone, “but what kept me awake here in Chiangmai last night was ‘what the hell is a former redhead’, and subsequently – could there ever be or have been an XI of redheads given we’ve got potentially 3 already...?” I shudder to think what you’ve started.
8.20am GMT
22nd over: South Africa 63-3 (Nortje 0, du Plessis 0) Root had just moved Pope to silly point, so full credit for that and time for the doubters to be silenced. What a match Pope is having. Yesterday, aged 22, he became the youngest right-hander to make a hundred for England since Colin Cowdrey in 1954 (hat-tip, the Times). In the past 66 years, two left-handers were even younger – can you name them?
8.15am GMT
An inside edge, a pop off the pad, a dive forwards from silly point – and England have the wicket they most wanted.
8.12am GMT
21st over: South Africa 61-2 (Elgar 33, Nortje 0) Wood’s pace again bothers Elgar, who flaps at a short one. The ball loops up and would be caught if there were two leg slips. Can’t blame Root for that.
8.07am GMT
20th over: South Africa 60-2 (Elgar 32, Nortje 0) It’s Dom Bess at the other end, so no Stuart Broad for now. He too opens with a maiden, but there are no alarms for the nightwatchman Nortje.
8.06am GMT
19th over: South Africa 60-2 (Elgar 32, Nortje 0) Wood does it again, third ball, and twice hurries Elgar into crabby deflections with a crooked bat. As first overs of the day go, that’s superb. But already the commentators are chuntering about a missing catcher, at second slip. Root did well on one side, with a short leg and a leg slip, but something in him keeps on wanting to overdo the caution. Maybe it’s the years he spent watching Alastair Cook setting the field.
8.02am GMT
It’s Mark Wood (hooray) and he opens with a jaffa – angled into the left-handed Elgar, and jagging past him. Not even Jerusalem can dampen the excitement.
8.00am GMT
“What times we live in,” says Bill Hargreaves. “Looking forward avidly to a day’s Test coverage. Thanks, in advance, for the great commentary, Tim.” Steady on. That could be like saying thanks, in advance, for the great captaincy, Joe.
7.59am GMT
Not only are England in charge, but the weather is better than forecast and the day seems to be starting on time. Something must be about to go horribly wrong, and Abhijato Sensarma is onto it. “The England Test side is easily one of the most volatile sporting outfits in the world. They oscillate from positions of comfort and advantage to ones of disarray and disadvantage, often within the same session. Yesterday was their best day in Test cricket for quite some time - the experienced players kept a cool head, while the young ones showed adequate style on their way to substance. The media is printing positive headlines for this team after a long time. If they do not follow it up with classical confusion, rusty bowling, and average fielding to surrender their advantage today, would the world even make sense anymore?”
4.14pm GMT
Morning everyone. England’s cricketers have just woken up to face an unfamiliar challenge: how do you follow a perfect day? Yesterday they had one fresh-faced 22-year-old making a masterly hundred, and then another grabbing two top-order wickets. England finished the day 439 ahead, with Dom Bess lording it at one end and Mark Wood delivering thunderbolts at the other. The good news for South Africa is that their task is simple enough: all they have to do is dig themselves out of a deep hole.
One piece of evidence is on their side. So far in the third Test, not a single wicket has fallen before lunch. England should be able to change that curious fact with their tails up and a nightwatchman to bowl at – although, the last time he found himself doing this job, Anrich Nortje made a handy fortje.
Continue reading...South Africa v England: third Test, day three – live!
9.24am GMT
37th over: South Africa 88-4 (Nortje 6, van der Dussen 11) Nortje, after making three off 66 balls, sensationally doubles his score with a leg glance off Broad.
“The Smarmy Army,” muses Peter Gingold (26th over). “Nice idea. But, sad to say, they’d have to stay in the UK on account of emissions from international flights.”
9.20am GMT
36th over: South Africa 84-4 (Nortje 3, van der Dussen 10) Bess’s arm ball kisses the edge as Nortje goes back and Root, at slip, spills a simple chance. Bess responds with no more than a rueful grimace, which is big of him given that that should have been his first Test five-for.
Here’s David Winter in Paris, questioning the very process of the OBO. “Are you live reporting on the third Test from the press box in Port Elizabeth, in the newsroom at Guardian HQ whilst surrounded by dynamic colleagues breaking news stories from around the world, or are you sat in your pants on your sofa at home?” That would be telling.
9.15am GMT
35th over: South Africa 83-4 (Nortje 3, van der Dussen 9) Broad tries a bouncer. Nortje faces the music, gets the splice on it, and would give a simple catch to short leg if Pope wasn’t so deep.
9.13am GMT
34th over: South Africa 83-4 (Nortje 3, van der Dussen 9) Nortje takes a single off Bess, who is now coming round the wicket, and van der Dussen plays the first attacking stroke since du Plessis. And it’s a very good one – a dance down the track and a clean hard hit past mid-on.
“Morning Tim.” Morning, Diana Powell. “What a magnificent bird on the photograph of the ground. What is it? Does it take catches on the boundary?” That bird has flown, alas – though perhaps somebody spotted it and can answer the question. All the time I should have spent with Observer’s Book of Birds went into Wisden.
9.06am GMT
33rd over: South Africa 78-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 5) This collapse began with a caught-and-bowled and Broad comes close to another one as van der Dussen is deceived by a leg-cutter. And that’s drinks, with England so dominant that it’s hard to believe.
Matthew Doherty has a question. “Has this Test secretly been re-allocated to Old Trafford 1956?” It’s true that Bess is in with a chance of being both Laker and Lock here. According to our friends at Cricinfo, he’s the first England spinner to take four wickets in the first 25 overs of a Test innings since Graeme Swann at Cardiff in 2011. But that was a second innings, and it didn’t even last 25 overs.
9.00am GMT
32nd over: South Africa 78-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 5) Bess keeps it tight as van der Dussen clips to midwicket for a single and Nortje blocks his way to 50 (balls).
“Well,” says Richard Mansell, “if one is South African this is as depressing as it must be exhilarating for England fans. It looks like we are heading for an innings defeat.” I realise that words of comfort from an Englishman may only make things worse, but ... Long way to go, and that rain has to come along some time.
8.56am GMT
31st over: South Africa 77-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 4) Broad has two short covers and no fine leg, so they might as well be in Sri Lanka already. He breaks off from bowling cutters to present Nortje with a lovely inswinger, which very nearly clips the off bail.
8.53am GMT
30th over: South Africa 77-4 (Nortje 2, van der Dussen 4) Anrich Nortje keeps Bess out and nicks a single off the last ball. He’s now faced 39 balls, more than anyone else in this innings except Elgar.
“Morning Tim,” says David Horn, “and what a fine one it’s turning out to be. Was wondering how Matt Parkinson might be feeling? Dom Bess wasn’t even in the original squad. Are we picking leg spinners for a tour just for the craic? I’m assuming he’s heading for the door marked ‘Mason Crane’ about now.” Ha, you’d be spot-on if there wasn’t a tour of Sri Lanka next. Parkinson will presumably be there unless Adil Rashid finds a miracle cure for his shoulder.
8.47am GMT
29th over: South Africa 76-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 4) By playing noticeably straight, van der Dussen deals better with Broad and picks up another two.
“Good morning from Port Elizabeth,” said Piet Morant, half an hour ago. “Looking forward to your fine commentary, especially since I turned down tickets at work from my colleague Alan when I saw how likely it was to rain, hour on hour [Preamble, below]. He was sure the rain would not come until this evening, but said you can’t count on the forecasters. ‘No, Alan, you can’t!’ Now he’s at the ground and I’m stuck at home with my windy dog.” As Rob Smyth would say: ach, sorry.
8.44am GMT
28th over: South Africa 74-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 2) Another maiden from Bess, who has 11-4-22-4 and has surely inked his name into the tour party for Sri Lanka.
8.42am GMT
27th over: South Africa 74-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 2) Mark Wood takes a break to rest on Bess’s laurels. Stuart Broad enters the fray and almost joins in the fun as Rassie van der Dussen, flummoxed by a cutter, chips into the covers, not far from Joe Denly.
8.40am GMT
26th over: South Africa 72-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 0) Bess whistles through a maiden to Nortje, with scarcely a thought for people trying to write OBOs.
“Looking forward to a great day,” wrote Leo a couple of wickets ago. “Meanwhile... ‘not even Jerusalem dampens the excitement’? [08:02] So what do we really think of the Barmy Army? Did I also detect a slight world-weariness creeping into the OBO yesterday as whoever was writing suggested he or she was somewhat unbeguiled by the continued carryings-on of the Crazy Corps? Has what started so many years ago as a slightly self-deprecatory unit of hard-core England supporters willing to brave the rigours of sometimes challenging foreign travel developed into something that, instead, now rather prominently displays elements of the Great British psyche perhaps better kept at home? And, if so, what can be done?
“Last night I had a dream... that, as an antidote, we Guardian Readers started to consider organising a small rival force of travelling supporters that will go out of their way to show another side of the English character. A group that will aim to ingratiate themselves with the host nation, cheering rather than denigrating the opposition at every opportunity, backing wholeheartedly the umpires’ adjudications, and taking care to compliment the ground staff on preparing such superb wickets! Who knows, taking the lead from the delightful Japanese World Cup fans a couple of years ago, this newly Regenerated Regiment could even stick around to help clean up the stadium after the day’s play. Come on, Guardian Readers! Why not?! After, of course, each of us has dutifully subscribed and contributed to the paper proper, let us join together to form our own brand of more ‘woke’ and enlightened supportership, We could do it! Come on! Let’s hear it for The Guardian’s own Smarmy Army.”
8.34am GMT
25th over: South Africa 72-4 (Nortje 1, van der Dussen 0) The nightwatchman is in danger of ending up not out here. Nortje almost falls to Wood, fending close to the inevitable Pope at short leg, but then plays a wily tuck that gets him off the mark, and, more importantly, up the other end. Wood has the unlikely figures of 7-4-7-0. He has been far more threatening than Bess, but the pitch is on Bess’s side, and so are the gods.
“On the pop quiz question [22nd over],” says Alex Bramble, “it has to be the stylistically contrasting David Ivon Gower and Alastair Nathan Cook.” We have a winner. “And,” he goes on, “I’m struggling to contain my enthusiasm about Pope; I haven’t felt this excited since, well, Joe Root, and Iron Bell before that (and yes it looks like Pope deserves such exalted comparisons!).” It does.
8.29am GMT
24th over: South Africa 71-4 (Nortje 0, van der Dussen 0) Faf had actually started well, dancing down the track to off-drive Bess for four, then repeating the trick next ball. But Bess stuck at it and got lucky. Poor old South Africa – they’re making England’s youngest players look like world-beaters.
8.26am GMT
Another one! Another big one! Faf du Plessis tucks Bess round the corner, where the unstoppable Pope pops up to take a simpler catch at square short leg. Dom Bess has FOUR FOR 22. The world has gone completely mad.
8.21am GMT
23rd over: South Africa 63-3 (Nortje 0, du Plessis 0) Another maiden from Wood, who seems to be adding parsimony to his arsenal. If he could just stay fit, he might well be England’s Mitchell Johnson.
“I know this is so yesterday,” says James Gladstone, “but what kept me awake here in Chiangmai last night was ‘what the hell is a former redhead’, and subsequently – could there ever be or have been an XI of redheads given we’ve got potentially 3 already...?” I shudder to think what you’ve started.
8.20am GMT
22nd over: South Africa 63-3 (Nortje 0, du Plessis 0) Root had just moved Pope to silly point, so full credit for that and time for the doubters to be silenced. What a match Pope is having. Yesterday, aged 22, he became the youngest right-hander to make a hundred for England since Colin Cowdrey in 1954. In the past 66 years, two left-handers were even younger – can you name them?
8.15am GMT
An inside edge, a pop off the pad, a dive forwards from silly point – and England have the wicket they most wanted.
8.12am GMT
21st over: South Africa 61-2 (Elgar 33, Nortje 0) Wood’s pace again bothers Elgar, who flaps at a short one. The ball loops up and would be caught if there were two leg slips. Can’t blame Root for that.
8.07am GMT
20th over: South Africa 60-2 (Elgar 32, Nortje 0) It’s Dom Bess at the other end, so no Stuart Broad for now. He too opens with a maiden, but there are no alarms for the nightwatchman Nortje.
8.06am GMT
19th over: South Africa 60-2 (Elgar 32, Nortje 0) Wood does it again, third ball, and twice hurries Elgar into crabby deflections with a crooked bat. As first overs of the day go, that’s superb. But already the commentators are chuntering about a missing catcher, at second slip. Root did well on one side, with a short leg and a leg slip, but something in him keeps on wanting to overdo the caution. Maybe it’s the years he spent watching Alastair Cook setting the field.
8.02am GMT
It’s Mark Wood (hooray) and he opens with a jaffa – angled into the left-handed Elgar, and jagging past him. Not even Jerusalem can dampen the excitement.
8.00am GMT
“What times we live in,” says Bill Hargreaves. “Looking forward avidly to a day’s Test coverage. Thanks, in advance, for the great commentary, Tim.” Steady on. That could be like saying thanks, in advance, for the great captaincy, Joe.
7.59am GMT
Not only are England in charge, but the weather is better than forecast and the day seems to be starting on time. Something must be about to go horribly wrong, and Abhijato Sensarma is onto it. “The England Test side is easily one of the most volatile sporting outfits in the world. They oscillate from positions of comfort and advantage to ones of disarray and disadvantage, often within the same session. Yesterday was their best day in Test cricket for quite some time - the experienced players kept a cool head, while the young ones showed adequate style on their way to substance. The media is printing positive headlines for this team after a long time. If they do not follow it up with classical confusion, rusty bowling, and average fielding to surrender their advantage today, would the world even make sense anymore?”
4.14pm GMT
Morning everyone. England’s cricketers have just woken up to face an unfamiliar challenge: how do you follow a perfect day? Yesterday they had one fresh-faced 22-year-old making a masterly hundred, and then another grabbing two top-order wickets. England finished the day 439 ahead, with Dom Bess lording it at one end and Mark Wood delivering thunderbolts at the other. The good news for South Africa is that their task is simple enough: all they have to do is dig themselves out of a deep hole.
One piece of evidence is on their side. So far in the third Test, not a single wicket has fallen before lunch. England should be able to change that curious fact with their tails up and a nightwatchman to bowl at – although, the last time he found himself doing this job, Anrich Nortje made a handy fortje.
Continue reading...January 17, 2020
South Africa v England: third Test, day two – live!
9.23am GMT
98th over: England 264-4 (Stokes 62, Pope 55) Pope plays a nice late cut off Philander that is well stopped by the diving Hamza in the gully. Those late cuts are another homage, deliberate or otherwise, to Ian Bell.
“On Thorpe’s partnerships,” says Timothy, “you seem to have Statsguru in your head. He seemed to be a good influence on Hick too.”
9.20am GMT
97th over: England 260-4 (Stokes 60, Pope 53) Stokes plays a disdainful short-arm jab for two off Nortje. Batting is starting to look easy for him, but with Stokes that isn’t always a good sign. It often means he is losing concentration, and that’s definitely the case here. He is lucky to get away with an edge that flies through the vacant second-slip area for four.
“Your Pope/Stokes preamble is proving pleasingly prescient,” says Emma John. “Thanks for keeping me updated on the rain delay, it meant I got an extra half hour in bed.”
9.14am GMT
96th over: England 252-4 (Stokes 52, Pope 53) Vernon Philander replaces Kagiso Rabada. Pope late cuts him for four, bringing up his first century partnership with Stokes. Spoiler: it isn’t their last. He repeats the stroke later in the over to bring up another high-class fifty, his third in the last four innings. If you’re not excited about what Ollie Pope might achieve in the next decade, you should seek urgent medical advice.
9.09am GMT
This is a load of idealistic crap.
Huge news - Kagiso Rabada banned for Johannesburg Test for picking up 4 demerit points. The one he has just received for yesterday's Root send-off triggered the ban. More on @guardian_sport shortly
9.08am GMT
95th over: England 243-4 (Stokes 51, Pope 45) Stokes is beaten, flashing at a short ball from Nortje. Careful now. Those lapses of concentration are his biggest weakness as a batsman. He walks right across his stumps to the next ball, flicking it in the air on the leg side for a single. It was probably a safer shot than it looked.
“Morning Rob,” says Robert Ellson. “Would like to add to your list of great England middle-order partnerships: Graham Thorpe and anyone.”
9.04am GMT
94th over: England 241-4 (Stokes 50, Pope 44) A short ball from Rabada does nothing off the pitch, which gives Stokes plenty of time to cart a pull to the midwicket boundary. He repeats the stroke later in the over to reach another masterful half-century from 102 balls. He has never batted better than in the last nine months, and his career average (36.62 and rising) is the highest it has been since he made that glorious hundred at Perth in only his second Test.
8.58am GMT
93rd over: England 231-4 (Stokes 40, Pope 44) Pope gets the first boundary of the day with a lovely stroke, flashing a shortish delivery from Nortje wide of gully. England have found a player, no point denying it. He’s class.
8.53am GMT
92nd over: England 225-4 (Stokes 39, Pope 39) In a surprising development, Kagiso Rabada will open the bowling from the Duckpond End. Stokes punches a couple of confident drives without piercing the field, and it’s a maiden.
8.49am GMT
91st over: England 225-4 (Stokes 39, Pope 39) Anrich Nortje opens the bowling to Ben Stokes, who turns a short ball off the hip for the first run of the day. Stokes has a good winter with the bat, with an average in excess of 50, though he’ll be annoyed that he hasn’t scored a century.
“Hi Rob,” says Jamie Gordon. “The sun’s just come out over Woking and the weather is heading in the direction of Port Elizabeth - we should be in for a fine day once we get started.”
8.43am GMT
This will be a two-hour morning session, despite the delayed start, with lunch put back to 12.45pm local time, 10.45pm in England.
8.42am GMT
There are rumours that Kagiso Rabada is in trouble for his celebration of Joe Root’s wicket yesterday. This ongoing attempt to impose the genteel ambience of a tea party upon international sport really is lamentable nonsense.
8.34am GMT
“It seems that subscription channels, with their big pockets, are hoovering up the Test series in different countries,” says Jim Todd. “My question is: how long before we have to subscribe and pay for OBO text commentary? And when that happens will the star OBO commentators be worth millions from all our subscription cash?”
Now that’s an IPL-style auction I’d like to see. ‘I have five over here, do I hear ten? Ten pence for Rob Smyth?’
8.30am GMT
Play will start at 8.45am, it says here.
8.24am GMT
The covers have come off, though there’s no scheduled start time yet.
8.16am GMT
It’s raining again. Play won’t be starting at 8.20am, that’s for sure. The upside of the delay is a fascinating chat about the minutiae of batting between Nick Knight, Dawid Malan and Rob Key in the Sky studio. Key, in particular, is a sensational pundit.
8.12am GMT
“Morning Rob,” says Guy Hornsby. “From an aptly very soggy and dark Salford, seems like it’s raining everywhere today. Hopefully Pope and Stokes can drip runs from a tired South African attack, the scoreboard will begin to flow and they’ll thunder us into a healthy 350+ total with a storm of boundaries. Or not.”
8.04am GMT
“This rain rather goes against the ‘Port Elizabeth, weather fine’ earworm I get whenever I see or hear the name Port Elizabeth,” says Andy Hockley.
Never trust an earworm. I drank Pepsi for a decade, thinking it was good for energy, and now look at my crooked smile.
8.04am GMT
Play will start at 8.20am/10.20am local time, weather permitting.
7.54am GMT
If you need a live cricket fix, Jonathan Howcroft is your man.
Related: India v Australia: second one-day international – live!
7.52am GMT
Ach, it’s raining again and the covers are going back on. It looks like it could be an on-off morning, though the forecast is better after lunch.
7.36am GMT
There’s been a bit of rain in Port Elizabeth, so the start will be delayed by 10 minutes.
7.24am GMT
Breakfast reading
Related: Pope and Stokes lead England fightback after slow start and Rabada double
Related: England’s Zak Crawley shows right qualities despite finding going tough | Chris Stocks
Related: ‘I was a made a scapegoat for England’s Test defeats,’ says Moeen Ali
6.51am GMT
Hello. Middle-order partnerships are an underappreciated part of cricket. We know all about the great opening pairs, yet we rarely talk about those down the order. And while they don’t bat together as often as the openers, they can still rack up thousands of runs together.
There are a few things that help to make a good partnership: contrasts (left and right hand, tall and short, dasher and blocker), off-field friendship, telepathic running between the wickets. But perhaps the most important is an indefinable chemistry. You could sense it in England’s best middle-order partnerships of modern times: Lamb and Smith, Hussain and Butcher, Flintoff and Jones, Pietersen and Collingwood.
Continue reading...January 16, 2020
South Africa v England: third Test, day one – as it happened
After a won toss and a very slow start England ended the first day of the third Test on 224-4 and with a slight advantage
3.47pm GMT
And with that, I’m done. Rob Smyth and Tom Davies will be here tomorrow. Bye!
3.43pm GMT
Here’s Vic Marks’ report on the first day’s action:
This was a slow burner of a day – except for those spectators foolish enough to stay out of the shade as a fierce sun blazed out of a cloudless sky. The pitch was slow, the band was surprisingly slow to play their trademark “Stand By Me” and for much of the time the batting was slow until Ollie Pope launched a mini-assault against the second new ball in front of an admiring Ben Stokes. Yet it would be foolish to conclude that in the 21st century it will stay as serene as this. Matches tend to accelerate on this ground. Despite a bland, innocuous-looking surface draws are now a rarity here.
When the players left the field England, after winning the toss, were 224 for four and oddly enough both sides could feel content with their efforts. The batsmen had battled away but only the best of them, which included Pope, could score with any freedom. None of them could post a half-century but the unbeaten partnership of 76 between Pope and Stokes in the final 90 minutes gave England the edge.
Related: Pope and Stokes lead England fightback after slow start and Rabada double
3.42pm GMT
Zak Crawley has a chat:
It’s been a very good day. I think we’re in a good position going into tomorrow. Hopefully we can bat for a while and then put them back in, because it’s only going to get worse from here, the pitch. It was as slow as I’ve batted for a while. It quickened up a little throughout the day. Hopefully it continues to quicken up and brings the nicks into it a bit more. [On his dismissal] I don’t think I can leave that, at that pace. Maybe to someone bowling a bit slower you can react and maybe put it away. At that pace it’s very instinctive. I could have kept it down, that would be the one thing, or gone up. He bowled me a similar ball earlier in the spell and I went up, which I thought about after. I think I was unlucky, but I shouldn’t have done what I did really.
I thought Rabada was going to take the first over, and when Philander bowled it I thought, it’ll be second over. And then I saw Paterson. I can kind of understand, on debut, they want to get him in the game. But if I were captain I’d probably have gone with Rabada. The game at Newlands was the best game ever. I couldn’t have asked for anything better than that. Hopefully if we get another win on this pitch, that would be a great effort and a very nice start.
3.27pm GMT
90th over: England 224-4 (Stokes 39, Pope 38) Maharaj, who has bowled more than a third of the day’s overs, finishes it with yet another maiden. It’s been a phenomenal effort from him across the day, but England probably end it with a slight advantage.
3.23pm GMT
89th over: England 224-4 (Stokes 39, Pope 38) Stokes leans back, swings his bat and pulls the ball high towards deep midwicket! Catch, come the cries, but it lands safe. A bit of a risky shot to play with eight balls remaining in the day, but all’s well that ends well, and that one ended in a four.
3.20pm GMT
88th over: England 218-4 (Stokes 33, Pope 38) Maharaj comes back, and Stokes snaffles another single. There will be two more overs today.
3.15pm GMT
87th over: England 217-4 (Stokes 32, Pope 38) A bit of late-in-the-day action for Rabada. Stokes is happy to see the over out, working the last to midwicket for a single.
3.12pm GMT
86th over: England 216-4 (Stokes 31, Pope 38) Pope clips Philander through midwicket for four. “I saw Pope’s Sweaty Helmet at the Melkweg in 1987,” writes Jim Baxter. “Some decent tunes but their stage show was unpleasant.” Oh yes, I remember them. They were part of the explosion of Somebody’s Something Something bands that eventually culminated in the blossoming of Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci and Ned’s Atomic Dustbin.
3.09pm GMT
85th over: England 212-4 (Stokes 31, Pope 34) Stokes pulls Nortje for four. This pair are batting excellently, while still giving the bowlers a bit of hope, making for fine entertainment. England will be pretty happy with their lot if both survive the last few overs of the day.
3.01pm GMT
84th over: England 205-4 (Stokes 26, Pope 33) A single for Stokes. Pope, now having issues with liquids going into his body as well as liquids coming out, calls for a bonus drink.
2.56pm GMT
83rd over: England 204-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 33) Pope has issues with a sweaty helmet, so to speak. Quiet at the back. He spends most of Nortje’s over trying to work out how to drain it, with liquid spraying out every time he moves. Maiden.
2.51pm GMT
82nd over: England 204-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 33) The lbw shout came from the first ball of Philander’s spell, and the bowler was significantly more excited about it than anyone else. Bowling round the wicket to the left-hander, the ball algled across was always likely to be going wide of off stump, and so it proved.
2.47pm GMT
Nowhere interesting, is the answer. South Africa have no more reviews, England have two.
2.46pm GMT
Stokes leaves, and the ball clips his thigh pad. Where was it going?
2.45pm GMT
81st over: England 204-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 33) The new ball is taken and thrown to Nortje, and Pope leaves the first couple, gets a bat to the third and then sends each of the last three to the rope! The first goes to third man, the second is nicely clipped through midwicket, and the last slammed past point!
2.38pm GMT
80th over: England 192-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 21) Two singles off Maharaj. The new ball is now officially due. Is this the end of Maharaj’s spell? I think they might have to prise this ball from his cold, dead hands.
2.37pm GMT
79th over: England 190-4 (Stokes 24, Pope 20) Pope gets the tiniest edge into his pads. Paterson buries his face in his hands, and then Pope works the next to square leg for a couple.
2.35pm GMT
78th over: England 188-4 (Stokes 24, Pope 18) Maharaj is just going to bowl forever. He’s bowled 29 overs today in one unbroken spell.
2.29pm GMT
77th over: England 186-4 (Stokes 23, Pope 13) After three dots Paterson bangs one in short and Pope helps it on its way, over slip and off for four. He does a funny kind of jump as he makes the shot, in which both feet leave the air and flick upwards, but his body doesn’t move. A kind of non-rising jump.
2.24pm GMT
76th over: England 182-4 (Stokes 23, Pope 13) Stokes thumps past extra cover for four. Actually there was a scoreboard link there throughout. Now there are two. Well, three, if you include the one in the previous update. Damn you, Steve Stern.
2.22pm GMT
75th over: England 177-4 (Stokes 19, Pope 12) A run each, off Paterson. Steve Stern points out that there has been no link to the scoreboard from the OBO. It’s now in the standfirst (at the top of the page), but it’s also here.
2.17pm GMT
74th over: England 175-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 11) Maharaj is still bowling. One off it. “I completely agree with you,” says Damian Burns on the DRS thing. “Where decisions are marginal go with the on-field decision. Everyone is happy. How the football people can’t get this in their heads is beyond me. Someone needs to tell them to switch over to the cricket now and again. We have a near flawless system, developed over many years of use.” But on the other hand:
Couldn't agree more - I've been harping on about this for years. Don't agree with Simon's rebuttal either - by that logic everything including the popping crease noball rule would also be umpire's call
2.10pm GMT
73rd over: England 174-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 11) Paterson bowls short, and Pope pulls it away for four! It’s been a relatively action-packed session, in which England have already scored as many runs as they did in the last one, and lost as many wickets. And that’s drinks.
2.05pm GMT
72nd over: England 168-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 5) Ooof! Maharaj hangs one outside off stump, Stokes tries to slog sweep it, and when he misses it completely the ball zips just past the stumps!
2.01pm GMT
71st over: England 167-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 4) Stokes drives Paterson to mid-on, where a diving fielder stops it reaching the rope. Next time he drives a bit straighter, and there’s no stopping this one.
1.56pm GMT
70th over: England 161-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Ye traditional Maharaj maiden.
1.56pm GMT
69th over: England 161-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Close! Paterson comes back and Stokes edges his first delivery straight to first slip only for the ball to bounce a foot short of the fielder!
1.50pm GMT
68th over: England 161-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Close! Stokes nudges one just wide of the fielder and short leg, who throws out a hand but can’t hold. “I don’t think the protocol is right for the circumstances of the Ben Stokes DRS,” says Gary Naylor. “Some of the ball struck in line with the stumps, so it hit ‘in line’. Umpire’s Call is irrelevant because they is no predictive element.” This reminds me of football’s offside/VAR issues, which are also a question of fact but there people are demanding a bit of flexibility. We can’t have it both ways, and I for one am entirely happy with the idea that DRS is there to correct clear umpiring errors and that didn’t constitute one.
1.46pm GMT
67th over: England 160-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Rabada flings a full toss at Stokes, who hits it past mid-on for four with such nonchalance that he might have been packing a pipe in his parlour.
1.40pm GMT
66th over: England 153-4 (Stokes 5, Pope 4) Maharaj was absolutely convinced that Stokes was out there, and was not shy about telling him so. Not to be, alas. Pope pummels the last ball to deep point for four to take England past 150.
1.38pm GMT
But he didn’t. Not even close. That’s a review lost.
1.37pm GMT
65th over: England 148-4 (Stokes 3, Pope) A simple forward defensive would have dealt with that, but Root moved backwards and limply, vainly waved his bat at it. England patiently plodded to 100, and are chaotically tumbling to 150.
1.34pm GMT
The ball stays a bit low, Root gets nowhere near it, and it destroys off stump!
1.31pm GMT
64th over: England 147-3 (Root 27, Stokes 3) Shot! Root sweeps past square leg for four, an excellent shot, and then tickles the next to fine leg for another. Another sweep off the last, but it doesn’t have the legs to reach the rope.
1.27pm GMT
It was close, though. Umpire’s call on contact, which saves him.
1.27pm GMT
Maharaj is again the bowler. It might have hit him outside the line, but it’s worth checking I think.
1.26pm GMT
63rd over: England 136-3 (Root 17, Stokes 2) Rabada extracts what menace he can from an unhelpful pitch.
1.21pm GMT
62nd over: England 134-3 (Root 17, Stokes 1) Maharaj has bowled excellently today to control England’s scoring - he’s going at 1.23 an over - and thoroughly deserves his reward.
1.19pm GMT
That is as lbw as lbws get. Still, the umpire didn’t see it and it took until the last second of their thinking time for South Africa to go with it.
Denly 3 runs off 62 balls from Maharaj today. Not dissimilar to Cape Town. Maharaj well worth the wicket.
1.18pm GMT
The umpire says no, but if this hit the pad before the bat he’s in big trouble.
1.14pm GMT
61st over: England 133-2 (Denly 25, Root 16) Another wide and loose Rabada delivery to start the over, which Denly cuts for four! England have scored a scarcely imaginable 16 runs in three overs!
1.09pm GMT
60th over: England 124-2 (Denly 18, Root 15) A 20th over for Maharaj yields a single off balls one and six. “I take a vicarious pleasure in watching players move up the ranks in the all time records list on Cricinfo’s stats page - and today is a real treat: a Root century will see him rise from 40 to 34 on the all time runs scored charts,” writes Richard Morris. “Given the current England run rate this is more exciting than actually watching England bat just now.”
1.06pm GMT
59th over: England 122-2 (Denly 17, Root 14) Root knocks the ball gently into the off side and goes for a single, and Denly was a yard and a half short of his ground when the throw zips just past the stumps! Then Rabada’s final delivery is wide and loose and Denly thumps it away for his second boundary of the day!
1.01pm GMT
The players are on their way back out. A big session ahead, as always.
12.43pm GMT
58th over: England 117-2 (Denly 13, Root 13) One more maiden to complete the session. South Africa have eked out a couple of wickets and England have scored 56 runs from 31 overs. Honours approximately even; I’ll be back in a bit.
12.39pm GMT
57th over: England 117-2 (Denly 13, Root 13) A fine, aggressive maiden over from Philander. “People might complain that the SR of the top three is boring or not modern, but it’s perfect for this situation imo,” says Chris Parker. “With Paterson, Rabada, and Nortje, SA have three guys who are at their best when bowling fast in short spells, and they’re already approaching 10 overs each for the day. Wear those guys out and let the middle order take advantage.” It’s a question of weighing up the benefits of best utilising ideal batting conditions or wearing down the bowlers.
12.35pm GMT
56th over: England 117-2 (Denly 13, Root 13) Root comes forward to Maharaj and nearly finds himself yorked. A single off the last brings him level with Denly.
12.33pm GMT
55th over: England 116-2 (Denly 13, Root 12) Philander’s back, concluding Nortje’s fine spell. “Intrigued, I binged Lulu the 19th century trapeze artist,” writes Robert Blanchard. “No words, but a few 1870s promotional items of her act at the Holborn Hippodrome. She was a believable she.” There’s a picture of her here, if you’re interested.
12.27pm GMT
54th over: England 115-2 (Denly 13, Root 11) A late cut brings Root four more, these scored more deliberately and chancelessly. He has 11 runs from 19 balls, Denly 13 from 73, though the latter is occasionally attempting aggressive shots, particularly against Maharaj; he backs away from the last to give him room to slap it straight to a fielder at cover.
12.24pm GMT
53rd over: England 110-2 (Denly 13, Root 6) More streaky runs for Root, who bottom-edges into his waist and thence away for four, and then hooks the last, off the top part of the bat if not the edge, to square leg, where no fielder is present to complete the catch. Sky show an interesting graphic, illustrating how much straighter Nortje has bowled since lunch, the tactic that led eventually to Crawley’s dismissal.
12.18pm GMT
52nd over: England 105-2 (Denly 13, Root 1) Root gets off the mark in streaky style, top-edging a sweep that dropped just short of Nortje, running around from square leg!
12.16pm GMT
51st over: England 103-2 (Denly 12, Root 0) A Nortje maiden to Root. “I’m sure that it is not the case - and I really must stress that to her lawyers - but calling the distraction to your distraction a ‘trapeze artist’ does sound a bit like a euphemism,” writes Robin Hazlehurst. Not at all. She was a trapeze artist, and really quite famous for it. What she wasn’t, in transpired, was a she.
12.12pm GMT
50th over: England 103-2 (Denly 12, Root 0) Denly’s strike rate is going down, now at 17.64 after another Maharaj maiden (53% of his 15 overs have brought no runs). Of his 24 Test innings only one has been slower, and that only lasted 24 balls. We’re treated to a few more replays of that Van der Dussen catch, which really was exceptionally good.
12.07pm GMT
49th over: England 103-2 (Denly 12, Root 0) Crawley swings his bat at a shoulder-high delivery that was heading just down leg side, nudging the ball a little wider for four, and England’s score into triple figures. Three balls later, he’s gone.
12.06pm GMT
That’s a fantastic catch at leg gully! Crawley clips the ball off his legs, and Van der Dussen dives to his right and just about holds the catch, which bounces off one hand, off the other, and finally settles in both!
12.02pm GMT
48th over: England 99-1 (Crawley 40, Denly 12) Another Crawley single. Denly, to be fair, advances and attempts to hit the final ball past extra cover but it’s cut off by the fielder at short mid off.
11.59am GMT
47th over: England 98-1 (Crawley 39, Denly 12) England are in no kind of hurry. Crawley gets a single.
11.54am GMT
46th over: England 97-1 (Crawley 38, Denly 12) Maharaj zips through a maiden over.
11.52am GMT
45th over: England 97-1 (Crawley 38, Denly 12) Hello everybody! I have been a bit distracted this morning, which I have mainly spent researching England’s 1876-77 tour of Australia and New Zealand (for future Spin purposes). Then I was distracted from my distraction by looking into a remarkable-sounding trapeze artist called Lulu (who the team met in Adelaide). Anyway, time to focus. Nortje bowls, and Denly clips one in the air just wide of midwicket.
11.42am GMT
44th over: England 95-1 (Crawley 37, Denly 11) Denly is beaten, fencing at a big-spinning delivery from Maharaj. Another maiden, and that’s drinks. Simon Burnton will be with you for the rest of the day – you can email him here. Bye!
11.40am GMT
43rd over: England 95-1 (Crawley 37, Denly 11) Lovely batting from Crawley, who waits for a wide short ball from Paterson and slaps it over the cordon for four. This has been a superbly judged innings.
11.37am GMT
42nd over: England 89-1 (Crawley 32, Denly 10) Denly doesn’t have many get-out strokes against Maharaj - and that almost leads to a get-out stroke of a different kind when he misses a rash slog-sweep. Maharaj, who is bowling beautifully, has figures of 11-5-13-0.
“You’re lucky the ‘reviewer’ who hadn’t read your book (33rd over) gave it 4 stars,” says Simon Myers. “I was concerned to see a toy we were considering had a single review on Argos of 1 star. Turned out the purchaser was unhappy because the child they were buying it for already had one.”
11.33am GMT
41st over: England 89-1 (Crawley 32, Denly 10) There’s no need for England to hurry. Plenty of people think this pitch will crumble, subcontinental-style, so first-innings runs will be worth their weight in scoreboard pressure.
“Morning Rob,” says J Wood. “That footage in the Australian dressing room is phenomenal. Is there a film coming out, do you know? I was, however, entirely depressed to hear the booing when Smith returned to carry on batting. I was there that day, and in my section of the ground, he got a standing ovation, so I didn’t hear any of that. Honestly, some people need to take a long hard look at themselves.”
11.28am GMT
40th over: England 84-1 (Crawley 31, Denly 6) “Talking of David Steele, he was well-known to be careful with his money,” says Steve Hudson, “and had one of the better nicknames – ‘Crime’, because he never pays.”
11.26am GMT
39th over: England 84-1 (Crawley 31, Denly 6) Paterson nips one back a fraction to Denly, who gets a thick inside-edge onto the pad. I think that was seam movement rather than reverse swing. I’m obsessed with reverse swing today. This is what happens when you read too many broadsheets.
Paterson then tries the old one-two, a bouncer followed by a half-volley. Denly has seen it all before and drives sweetly between short extra and mid-off for four. He plays some gorgeous strokes.
11.22am GMT
38th over: England 80-1 (Crawley 31, Denly 2) A reprieve for Denly, who drives Maharaj a fraction short - if that - of Elgar at short extra cover. Elgar swooped forward in an attempt to take the catch, but it reached him on the half-volley and he couldn’t get his fingers under the ball. It was an extremely difficult chance.
11.18am GMT
37th over: England 78-1 (Crawley 30, Denly 1) The debutant Dane Paterson returns to the attack. He’s a reverse-swing expert, so keep your eyes on the shiny side. Nothing to report in that over, from which one run accrues. England are scoring at 2.1 per over, and it’s great.
“I had a novel come out a while ago and had an Amazon reviewer give it one star and say it was awful,” says Pete Salmon. “I checked him out only to find that his only other review was of an electric toothbrush recharger. Four stars! In terms of utility the chap had a point, but it did take three years of my life.”
11.15am GMT
36th over: England 77-1 (Crawley 29, Denly 1) A maiden from Maharaj to Denly, who is off to his usual slow start. No that was a compliment.
11.12am GMT
35th over: England 77-1 (Crawley 29, Denly 1) South Africa, control freaks that they are in the field, will be happy that England haven’t got away from them. England might lose two quick wickets now, but I would still prefer 90/3 in the 40th to 90/3 in the 25th. It’s a hot day, and if all goes well they will have the opportunity to punish South Africa in the final session.
“Morning Rob, morning everyone,” says Robert Ellson. “I always enjoyed that remark of Peter Roebuck’s, that as Somerset’s no.4, his main job was to stay in long enough to prevent Richards (no.3) and Botham (no.5) batting together, lest counterproductive member-measuring should occur. In a not-really-similar way, I think Joe Denly’s role in this England side is simply to bat well enough to stop any talk of Root moving up from no.4. If Denly only averages 30, but Root goes back up towards 50, he’ll have performed a valuable service to England.”
11.07am GMT
34th over: Kent 75-1 (Crawley 28, Denly 0) Nobody knows whether he’ll make it or not, but there is a lot to like about Crawley’s game. He plays with a breezy confidence, and his bat seems to have an appreciable middle. He’s also light on his feet against the spinners, as he shows by dancing down to to drive Maharaj for a single.
“Hi Rob,” says Neil Harris. “What was Brendon McCullum’s strike rate as an opener?”
11.05am GMT
33rd over: England 74-1 (Crawley 27, Denly 0) “I did look at those customer reviews of The Judge,” says Matt Dony. “My favourite was the one that said ‘I bought it as a present, so I haven’t read it.’ And then awarded the book 4 stars.”
Which, SINCE YOU ASKED, brought the blOODY AVERAGE DOWN.
11.00am GMT
32nd over: England 74-1 (Crawley 27, Denly 0) Crawley survives an LBW appeal from Maharaj - it was missing leg - and then puts him away to the midwicket boundary. Another good over from Maharaj, who looks like his old self today.
10.59am GMT
31st over: England 70-1 (Crawley 23, Denly 0) That was such a good over from Rabada, who created something out of nothing. Sibley had already survived two false strokes - one landed just short of midwicket, the other flew past gully at catchable height - and was sufficiently unsettled that he got out to the last delivery.
10.57am GMT
Brilliant bowling from Kagiso Rabada! He troubled Sibley throughout the over before dismissing him with the final delivery. Sibley flicked a shortish ball towards short backward square leg, where Elgar dived forward to take a nice catch.
10.52am GMT
30th over: England 64-0 (Crawley 23, Sibley 30) Crawley edges Maharaj wide of slip for a couple. I don’t think it would have carried anyway, but it was nicely bowled. South Africa will back him to at least hold an end - and maybe pick up a couple of wickets - while they wait for the ball to reverse.
“This may be the first time in nine years that England have batted through the first session,” says Felix Wood, “but in more recent memory they were no wickets down at lunch on the first day...”
10.49am GMT
29th over: England 62-0 (Crawley 21, Sibley 30) Rabada, the pick of the bowlers before lunch, returns to the attack. Crawley continues to play with discipline and restraint. In the second innings of the last Test he made a skittish 25 from 35 balls; today he has 21 from 86.
“Some other nerd has probably got here first but...” begins John Horsley.
10.44am GMT
28th over: England 61-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 30) The left-arm spinner Maharaj starts after the interval. There was a snifter of turn before lunch, more than you’d expect in the first session of a Test, and a couple of deliveries straighten promisingly to Sibley. A maiden.
“Roy Fredericks was no slouch,” says Andrew Harrison. “Would love to have seen his 71-ball ton against Lillee and Thomson at the WACA.”
10.38am GMT
“I reckon Warner’s true antecedent was Keith Stackpole, a burly Australian who gave the ball a hell of a thwack,” says Mike Jakeman. “Also gave plenty of chances to the fielders, too.”
And he had one of those clever nicknames: Stacky.
10.06am GMT
“Regarding fast-scoring openers…” says Steve Hudson. “Wot, no Sehwag? No Jayasuriya? As for early examples of this style, how about Bob Barber in Aus in 1965/66?”
Sehwag and Jayasuriya came after Slater, though obviously before Warner. Bob Barber is an excellent suggestion, although he didn’t do it for long enough to have a wider influence. I think Slater had the biggest global impact.
10.03am GMT
Lunchtime reading
Related: England’s 500 overseas Tests: from horse-drawn carts to DVD marathons | Simon Burnton
10.02am GMT
27th over: England 61-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 30) That’s lunch. I’m not certain, because I’m not, but I think this is the first time since the Oval Test against India in 2011 that England have batted through the first session of a Test without losing a wicket. Nine years, man!
Zak Crawley and Dom Sibley played with patience and commonsense on a very slow pitch, and their partnership has given England a great chance to take control of this match in the first innings. South Africa need reverse swing, and fast.
9.58am GMT
26th over: England 61-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 30) “Morning Rob - I thought we’d agreed never to mention Michael Slater again?” says David Horn. “(We didn’t actually, but it’s an unspoken pact I have with OBO’ers) He did more than break opening. He broke an entire cricket following nation in one over (one ball, really) in 1994, and he broke me. I was 21, had just started working in Big City, thought anything was possible, and then Michael Slater broke everything. To cap it all, Simon Burnton’s piece reminds me every time I’m feeling particularly masochistic.”
I was unemployed at the time so planned to stay up all night. I honestly almost went to bed after one ball, and I did go to bed after Martin McCague’s first spell disappeared all round Brisbane.
9.55am GMT
25th over: England 59-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 28) Crawley, a naturally attacking batsman, has played with impressive restraint. In fact his strike rate today (26) is less than half his career strike rate in first-class cricket (58). He knows this is a rare opportunity to bat long - and maybe even do that - in a Test match.
“The English idea of ‘nicknames’ is not really a nickname at all,” says Andrew Webber, aka Lloyd. “Nicknames should have some thought, humour or association given to them as we Aussies do. Jason Gillespie was named Dizzy in association with the trumpeter. Steve Waugh was called Tugga for a while. Mark Waugh named Junior as the younger Waugh twin. Beefy Botham passes the test as a big man of ox like stature and heart...”
9.51am GMT
24th over: England 56-0 (Crawley 19, Sibley 26) Crawley survives an LBW appeal after missing an absent-minded paddle sweep. It brushed the glove and hit him outside the line anyway. Hamza, at slip, ran across towards leg slip in an attempt to intercept the sweep. Had he stayed in position at first slip, he would have had a good chance of catching Crawley.
Sibley is beaten by some sharp turn later in the over, which will encourage both Maharaj and Dom Bess.
9.46am GMT
23rd over: England 54-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 25) Nortje jags one back to hit Sibley in the stomach. A few deliveries have taken the openers by the surprise, but generally it’s been a lovely morning on which to bat. Sibley gets his fourth boundary later in the over, deliberately uppercutting Nortje over the slips.
“The BBC cricket social is wondering if England openers are too boring…” says Thomas Whiteley. “I blame David Warner. He broke opening the way Gilchrist broke wicketkeeping.”
9.42am GMT
22nd over: England 50-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 21) The left-arm spinner Keshav Maharaj comes into the attack. There’s some encouraging early turn to Crawley, who plays out another maiden. That’s the seventh of the morning.
Thanks, meanwhile, to Gary Naylor for this link, about which I am officially excited.
9.38am GMT
21st over: England 50-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 21) Nortje, who has changed ends to replace Rabada, starts with a maiden to Sibley. It’s been a dull morning, but that suits England just fine.
9.33am GMT
20th over: England 50-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 21) Crawley thick-edges a back-foot drive for four, which brings up a serene fifty partnership. But then Philander reminds us all of his threat with a beauty that seams past Crawley’s outside edge. At least I think it was seam movement, though it may have been reverse swing.
9.28am GMT
19th over: England 46-0 (Crawley 14, Sibley 21) South Africa’ fielders are throwing the ball into the pitch, trying to rough it up so that it will reverse swing. It does usually reverse here. South Africa desperately need it to do so, because Crawley and Sibley are in complete control.
“Is it too soon,” says Kim Thonger, “to mention the highest ever England opening partnership of 359 by Len Hutton and Cyril Washbrook in South Africa in December 1948?”
9.23am GMT
18th over: England 43-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Philander replaces Nortje, which means a change of ends from his new-ball spell. His first ball beats Sibley outside off stump; the rest is harmless. England are progressing with disconcerting comfort.
“Morning, Rob,” says Smylers. “England’s top three must be causing havoc with their long-standing nickname policy of just adding -y to players’ surnames. Have you heard on the stump mic how they’re coping? Has anyone attempted ‘Sibbleyey’, ‘Crawleyey’, or ‘Denlyey’?”
9.17am GMT
17th over: England 43-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Rabada strays onto the pads of Crawley, with the ball zipping away for four leg-byes. Nothing much is happening for South Africa, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Faf du Plessis turned to spin before lunch.
9.14am GMT
16th over: England 39-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Too straight from Nortje, and Sibley drives imperiously wide of mid-on for four. Shot! “It’s a really slow deck,” says Mike Atherton on Sky. “As an opener, when you’ve got past the new ball, you’re saying, ‘This is the day. This is my day.’”
“After reading your comments about the Basil D’Oliveira trophy (5th over) I had a close look at a picture of it,” says Kevin Holloway. “I was surprised by how little the bust, to my eye, looks like the great man. Even the hair is parted on the wrong side - I think? It occurred to me that the sculptor might have googled D’Oliveira and mistaken a photo of Dolly’s son, Damian, for a photo of Dolly …”
9.10am GMT
15th over: England 33-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 14) This looks like an excellent opportunity for England to bore South Africa’s bowlers into submission. Sibley, in particular, has the perfect temperament to bat in conditions like this. If the ball doesn’t reverse swing, it could be a long day for South Africa.
9.03am GMT
“Hi Rob,” says Billy Mills. “A bit cheeky, I know, but any chance of a shout-out for Ireland’s win over the Windies in the T20 last night, and especially for Josh Little’s nerve-shredding last over? I know it’s not really cricket, but as an Irishman, we’ll take what we get!”
Not cheeky at all – that was a seriously impressive win against a very strong West Indies side.
9.01am GMT
14th over: England 30-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 13) Sibley repeats his stroke in the previous Nortje over, waving a cut through backward point for four. He has started superbly. Right here, right now, Sibley has a Test average of 41.16. Some people wanted him dropped, never to be seen again, after the New Zealand tour. That’s drinks.
“Have England ever had two openers with three-letter forenames?” says Daniel Harris. “Yes, Dom is Dominic, but Cricinfo have him down as Dom. I don’t think it’s a proclivity.”
8.58am GMT
13th over: England 26-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 9) That errant pull stroke aside, Crawley has looked fine against Rabada so far. Rabada’s line has been immaculate, but so has Crawley’s judgement of off stump.
8.53am GMT
12th over: England 26-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 9) Anrich Nortje replaces the debutant Dane Paterson, who bowled a reasonable first spell of 5-0-10-0. His second ball is steered crisply through backward point for four by Sibley. With no pace in the pitch and little movement, this looks like a beautiful day for batting. But we’ve said that before with England, is it not.
“Former Essex and Notts batsman Will Jefferson - now there was a tall opener,” says Ian Forth. “He played on an England A tour but never quite fulfilled his potential, partly perhaps because he was 6 foot 10 inches tall. I seem to remember Tom Graveney was pretty tall too - certainly by the diminished stature of Englishmen in a country on 1950s rations.”
8.47am GMT
11th over: England 22-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 5) Rabada has started excellently, with a challenging line just outside off stump. Sibley steals a single into the off side to move to five from 28 balls. As ever, he has crawled out of the blocks. No, that was a compliment.
“England have now gone 35 Tests without naming an unchanged side (including the batting line-up),” says Chris Parker. “Funnily enough the last time we did it was the 4th Test vs SA, but that was the home series back in August 2017.”
8.44am GMT
10th over: England 21-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 4) The pitch looks pretty slow, as promised, and Crawley mistimes another pull stroke. This one, off Paterson, fell just short of mid-on.
8.39am GMT
9th over: England 19-0 (Crawley 9, Sibley 4) Rabada comes on to replace Philander, not Paterson. He won that compelling contest with Crawley in the second innings of the second Test, and almost picks him up again here. Crawley mistimed a front-foot pull that teased Nortje, running back from mid-on, before dropping just in front of him. Careful now.
“Hello Rob,” says Matt Doherty. “From memory the only other tall openers were Chris Broad and Tim Robinson.”
8.34am GMT
8th over: England 17-0 (Crawley 8, Sibley 4) The Paterson decision hasn’t really worked for South Africa. He hasn’t bowled badly; he just hasn’t found much movement off the pitch or in the air.
8.29am GMT
7th over: England 14-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 3) Quinton de Kock has moved up to the stumps for Philander to stop Crawley batting outside his crease. The result is a maiden. England’s young openers - Crawley 21, Sibley 24 - have started calmly, although South Africa’s decision to hold Kagiso Rabada back has helped.
8.25am GMT
6th over: England 14-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 3) “With Crawley and Sibley both looking like at least 6ft4, is this England’s tallest ever opening partnership?” says Oliver Haill. “And is there any significance in that?”
Climate change. Actually, it might be the tallest. Tony Greig never opened for England, and I can’t think of any particularly tall openers. Cook and KP at Headingley in 2012 maybe.
8.20am GMT
5th over: England 12-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 1) A rare piece of filth from Philander, short and wide, is larruped to the cover boundary by Crawley. Whether in attack or defence, the ball makes a lovely sound off Crawley’s bat.
“Morning Rob,” says Richard Vale. “Am I alone in thinking that the Basil D’Oliveira Trophy being a bust of the man himself is just weird?”
8.17am GMT
4th over: England 8-0 (Crawley 3, Sibley 1) Not a great over from Paterson. He was too straight, which allowed a couple of singles into the leg side and then four leg byes when the ball flew to the boundary off Sibley’s pad.
8.13am GMT
3rd over: England 2-0 (Crawley 2, Sibley 0) It looks like a clammy day in Port Elizabeth, though it’s not always easy to discern conditions in South Africa when you’re in an office approximately 9.371.6 miles away. There’s a bit of grass on the pitch, as is usually the case in South Africa on the first morning, and Crawley is beaten by a glorious delivery from Philander that nips away off the seam. Only Steve Smith would have nicked that. The rest of the over is defended confidently.
Good stuff from the Sky Sports team, who use the popular split-screen medium to demonstrate that Crawley has made a technical change, with his bat coming down much straighter.
8.08am GMT
2nd over: England 2-0 (Crawley 2, Sibley 0) Well I’ll be damned. Dane Paterson, rather than Kagiso Rabada, will share the new ball. That’s an eccentric decision, though I’m sure South Africa have a plan. His fourth ball is a beauty, shaping away to beat Sibley’s defensive poke. We have seen Paterson before, by the way - he gave a death-bowling masterclass in a T20 at Cardiff three years ago.
8.04am GMT
1st over: England 1-0 (Crawley 1, Sibley 0) Philander’s second ball nips back sharply to hit Crawley on the thigh pad, and the third takes a thickish edge before falling short of third slip. Immaculate stuff from Philander, as always. Crawley then works a single into the leg side to put England 1-0 up.
“Looking at Joe Root’s England blazer alongside the natty South African equivalent, I was immediately struck by how plainly classical it looks,” says Tom van der Gucht, If you ask me, although judging by my own sartorial crimes against humanity you probably shouldn’t, the ECB need to invest some of the money being blown on The Hundred in some extra trimming on their jackets. Nothing too garish: perhaps just a couple of gold rings around the cuffs and something along the lapels. Who knows, maybe it would empower Root’s leadership if he resembled a young Captain Birdseye.”
8.00am GMT
Here we go. Vernon Philander has the new ball, Zak Crawley is in the interrogation room. This will be a challenging morning for England.
7.53am GMT
Now this is how to start a Test match
“Morning Rob,” says Tom Bowtell. “There is a tantalising chance of an era-defining statgasm this morning. If Philander concedes 24 runs without taking a wicket, his career figures will read 222 wickets @ 22.22. It rather tarnishes Big Vern’s career that he lacked the foresight and basic human decency to have scored 171 fewer Test runs which would have given him a current batting average of 22.22.”
7.50am GMT
“Where do you think Chris Woakes is at the moment?” says Kevin Wilson. “He’s the least talked up of any of England’s quicks. He’s been in and out of the side and bowled well in Hamilton and was reasonably decent in the Ashes. But even when he’s played, it feels like Root underbowls him. He’s the natural replacement for Anderson with the new ball. I’m fine with Wood coming in as I think some extra pace will be needed, but the decision you need to make is around the new ball. Would Woakes be more effective with the new ball than Sam Curran?”
His illness has made this tour a bit of a write-off. He’ll always be a good option, especially at home, and I thought he was poorly managed during the Ashes. But I’d say England are right to use Curran for now. Woakes is 31 in March and has a chronic knee injury; it wouldn’t shock me if Anderson outlasted him as a Test player.
7.40am GMT
Pre-match reading
Related: England hope Wood’s extra pace can help swing series their way | Vic Marks
Related: England’s 500 overseas Tests: from horse-drawn carts to DVD marathons | Simon Burnton
Related: The Spin | 'We piled on Allan Border in a pub': England U19s' class of 98 relive victory
7.36am GMT
Both teams make one change, with each bringing in a skiddy fast bowler. South Africa give a debut to Dane Paterson, who replaces the allrounder Dwaine Pretorius. England bring in Mark Wood for the injured Jimmy Anderson.
South Africa Elgar, Malan, Hamza, du Plessis (c), van der Dussen, de Kock (wk), Philander, Maharaj, Rabada, Nortje, Paterson.
7.33am GMT
“It looks a good surface, dry underneath, and it could deteriorate,” says Joe Root.
Faf du Plessis, who has now lost six tosses in a row, says he would also have batted, though it was a 60/40 call.
6.09am GMT
Hello and welcome to live, over-by-over coverage of the third Test between South Africa and England at Port Elizabeth. Let’s start with something thrilling, a list of scores: 1-1, 1-0, 2-1, 2-1, 2-2, 1-2, 1-2, 1-1, 0-2, 1-2, 3-1. Those are the series results between these sides since South Africa were readmitted in 1991. No whitewashes, not even a rout, and only three dead rubbers in 11 series.
South Africa and England have been the most well-matched sides in world cricket in the last 30 years. Some might say that’s because they’re essentially the same team, but that’s one for the Guardian Sport SuperBrains to consider. What we can say with confidence is that contests between the two usually come with a guarantee of tense, hard-nosed, occasionally brilliant cricket.
Continue reading...South Africa v England: third Test, day one – live!
9.23am GMT
18th over: England 43-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Philander replaces Nortje, which means a change of ends from his new-ball spell. His first ball beats Sibley outside off stump; the rest is harmless. England are progressing with disconcerting comfort.
“Morning, Rob,” says Smylers. “England’s top three must be causing havoc with their long-standing nickname policy of just adding -y to players’ surnames. Have you heard on the stump mic how they’re coping? Has anyone attempted ‘Sibbleyey’, ‘Crawleyey’, or ‘Denlyey’?”
9.17am GMT
17th over: England 43-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Rabada strays onto the pads of Crawley, with the ball zipping away for four leg-byes. Nothing much is happening for South Africa, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Faf du Plessis turned to spin before lunch.
9.14am GMT
16th over: England 39-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Too straight from Nortje, and Sibley drives imperiously wide of mid-on for four. Shot! “It’s a really slow deck,” says Mike Atherton on Sky. “As an opener, when you’ve got past the new ball, you’re saying, ‘This is the day. This is my day.’”
“After reading your comments about the Basil D’Oliveira trophy (5th over) I had a close look at a picture of it,” says Kevin Holloway. “I was surprised by how little the bust, to my eye, looks like the great man. Even the hair is parted on the wrong side - I think? It occurred to me that the sculptor might have googled D’Oliveira and mistaken a photo of Dolly’s son, Damian, for a photo of Dolly …”
9.10am GMT
15th over: England 33-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 14) This looks like an excellent opportunity for England to bore South Africa’s bowlers into submission. Sibley, in particular, has the perfect temperament to bat in conditions like this. If the ball doesn’t reverse swing, it could be a long day for South Africa.
9.03am GMT
“Hi Rob,” says Billy Mills. “A bit cheeky, I know, but any chance of a shout-out for Ireland’s win over the Windies in the T20 last night, and especially for Josh Little’s nerve-shredding last over? I know it’s not really cricket, but as an Irishman, we’ll take what we get!”
Not cheeky at all – that was a seriously impressive win against a very strong West Indies side.
9.01am GMT
14th over: England 30-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 13) Sibley repeats his stroke in the previous Nortje over, waving a cut through backward point for four. He has started superbly. Right here, right now, Sibley has a Test average of 41.16. Some people wanted him dropped, never to be seen again, after the New Zealand tour. That’s drinks.
“Have England ever had two openers with three-letter forenames?” says Daniel Harris. “Yes, Dom is Dominic, but Cricinfo have him down as Dom. I don’t think it’s a proclivity.”
8.58am GMT
13th over: England 26-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 9) That errant pull stroke aside, Crawley has looked fine against Rabada so far. Rabada’s line has been immaculate, but so has Crawley’s judgement of off stump.
8.53am GMT
12th over: England 26-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 9) Anrich Nortje replaces the debutant Dane Paterson, who bowled a reasonable first spell of 5-0-10-0. His second ball is steered crisply through backward point for four by Sibley. With no pace in the pitch and little movement, this looks like a beautiful day for batting. But we’ve said that before with England, is it not.
“Former Essex and Notts batsman Will Jefferson - now there was a tall opener,” says Ian Forth. “He played on an England A tour but never quite fulfilled his potential, partly perhaps because he was 6 foot 10 inches tall. I seem to remember Tom Graveney was pretty tall too - certainly by the diminished stature of Englishmen in a country on 1950s rations.”
8.47am GMT
11th over: England 22-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 5) Rabada has started excellently, with a challenging line just outside off stump. Sibley steals a single into the off side to move to five from 28 balls. As ever, he has crawled out of the blocks. No, that was a compliment.
“England have now gone 35 Tests without naming an unchanged side (including the batting line-up),” says Chris Parker. “Funnily enough the last time we did it was the 4th Test vs SA, but that was the home series back in August 2017.”
8.44am GMT
10th over: England 21-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 4) The pitch looks pretty slow, as promised, and Crawley mistimes another pull stroke. This one, off Paterson, fell just short of mid-on.
8.39am GMT
9th over: England 19-0 (Crawley 9, Sibley 4) Rabada comes on to replace Philander, not Paterson. He won that compelling contest with Crawley in the second innings of the second Test, and almost picks him up again here. Crawley mistimed a front-foot pull that teased Nortje, running back from mid-on, before dropping just in front of him. Careful now.
“Hello Rob,” says Matt Doherty. “From memory the only other tall openers were Chris Broad and Tim Robinson.”
8.34am GMT
8th over: England 17-0 (Crawley 8, Sibley 4) The Paterson decision hasn’t really worked for South Africa. He hasn’t bowled badly; he just hasn’t found much movement off the pitch or in the air.
8.29am GMT
7th over: England 14-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 3) Quinton de Kock has moved up to the stumps for Philander to stop Crawley batting outside his crease. The result is a maiden. England’s young openers - Crawley 21, Sibley 24 - have started calmly, although South Africa’s decision to hold Kagiso Rabada back has helped.
8.25am GMT
6th over: England 14-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 3) “With Crawley and Sibley both looking like at least 6ft4, is this England’s tallest ever opening partnership?” says Oliver Haill. “And is there any significance in that?”
Climate change. Actually, it might be the tallest. Tony Greig never opened for England, and I can’t think of any particularly tall openers. Cook and KP at Headingley in 2012 maybe.
8.20am GMT
5th over: England 12-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 1) A rare piece of filth from Philander, short and wide, is larruped to the cover boundary by Crawley. Whether in attack or defence, the ball makes a lovely sound off Crawley’s bat.
“Morning Rob,” says Richard Vale. “Am I alone in thinking that the Basil D’Oliveira Trophy being a bust of the man himself is just weird?”
8.17am GMT
4th over: England 8-0 (Crawley 3, Sibley 1) Not a great over from Paterson. He was too straight, which allowed a couple of singles into the leg side and then four leg byes when the ball flew to the boundary off Sibley’s pad.
8.13am GMT
3rd over: England 2-0 (Crawley 2, Sibley 0) It looks like a clammy day in Port Elizabeth, though it’s not always easy to discern conditions in South Africa when you’re in an office approximately 9.371.6 miles away. There’s a bit of grass on the pitch, as is usually the case in South Africa on the first morning, and Crawley is beaten by a glorious delivery from Philander that nips away off the seam. Only Steve Smith would have nicked that. The rest of the over is defended confidently.
Good stuff from the Sky Sports team, who use the popular split-screen medium to demonstrate that Crawley has made a technical change, with his bat coming down much straighter.
8.08am GMT
2nd over: England 2-0 (Crawley 2, Sibley 0) Well I’ll be damned. Dane Paterson, rather than Kagiso Rabada, will share the new ball. That’s an eccentric decision, though I’m sure South Africa have a plan. His fourth ball is a beauty, shaping away to beat Sibley’s defensive poke. We have seen Paterson before, by the way - he gave a death-bowling masterclass in a T20 at Cardiff three years ago.
8.04am GMT
1st over: England 1-0 (Crawley 1, Sibley 0) Philander’s second ball nips back sharply to hit Crawley on the thigh pad, and the third takes a thickish edge before falling short of third slip. Immaculate stuff from Philander, as always. Crawley then works a single into the leg side to put England 1-0 up.
“Looking at Joe Root’s England blazer alongside the natty South African equivalent, I was immediately struck by how plainly classical it looks,” says Tom van der Gucht, If you ask me, although judging by my own sartorial crimes against humanity you probably shouldn’t, the ECB need to invest some of the money being blown on The Hundred in some extra trimming on their jackets. Nothing too garish: perhaps just a couple of gold rings around the cuffs and something along the lapels. Who knows, maybe it would empower Root’s leadership if he resembled a young Captain Birdseye.”
8.00am GMT
Here we go. Vernon Philander has the new ball, Zak Crawley is in the interrogation room. This will be a challenging morning for England.
7.53am GMT
Now this is how to start a Test match
“Morning Rob,” says Tom Bowtell. “There is a tantalising chance of an era-defining statgasm this morning. If Philander concedes 24 runs without taking a wicket, his career figures will read 222 wickets @ 22.22. It rather tarnishes Big Vern’s career that he lacked the foresight and basic human decency to have scored 171 fewer Test runs which would have given him a current batting average of 22.22.”
7.50am GMT
“Where do you think Chris Woakes is at the moment?” says Kevin Wilson. “He’s the least talked up of any of England’s quicks. He’s been in and out of the side and bowled well in Hamilton and was reasonably decent in the Ashes. But even when he’s played, it feels like Root underbowls him. He’s the natural replacement for Anderson with the new ball. I’m fine with Wood coming in as I think some extra pace will be needed, but the decision you need to make is around the new ball. Would Woakes be more effective with the new ball than Sam Curran?”
His illness has made this tour a bit of a write-off. He’ll always be a good option, especially at home, and I thought he was poorly managed during the Ashes. But I’d say England are right to use Curran for now. Woakes is 31 in March and has a chronic knee injury; it wouldn’t shock me if Anderson outlasted him as a Test player.
7.40am GMT
Pre-match reading
Related: England hope Wood’s extra pace can help swing series their way | Vic Marks
Related: England’s 500 overseas Tests: from horse-drawn carts to DVD marathons | Simon Burnton
Related: The Spin | 'We piled on Allan Border in a pub': England U19s' class of 98 relive victory
7.36am GMT
Both teams make one change, with each bringing in a skiddy fast bowler. South Africa give a debut to Dane Paterson, who replaces the allrounder Dwaine Pretorius. England bring in Mark Wood for the injured Jimmy Anderson.
South Africa Elgar, Malan, Hamza, du Plessis (c), van der Dussen, de Kock (wk), Philander, Maharaj, Rabada, Nortje, Paterson.
7.33am GMT
“It looks a good surface, dry underneath, and it could deteriorate,” says Joe Root.
Faf du Plessis, who has now lost six tosses in a row, says he would also have batted, though it was a 60/40 call.
6.09am GMT
Hello and welcome to live, over-by-over coverage of the third Test between South Africa and England at Port Elizabeth. Let’s start with something thrilling, a list of scores: 1-1, 1-0, 2-1, 2-1, 2-2, 1-2, 1-2, 1-1, 0-2, 1-2, 3-1. Those are the series results between these sides since South Africa were readmitted in 1991. No whitewashes, not even a rout, and only three dead rubbers in 11 series.
South Africa and England have been the most well-matched sides in world cricket in the last 30 years. Some might say that’s because they’re essentially the same team, but that’s one for the Guardian Sport SuperBrains to consider. What we can say with confidence is that contests between the two usually come with a guarantee of tense, hard-nosed, occasionally brilliant cricket.
Continue reading...January 12, 2020
Aston Villa 1-6 Manchester City: Premier League – as it happened
Sergio Aguero set new records for the most Premier League hat-tricks and the most goals by a foreign player as City butchered an under-strength Villa
6.33pm GMT
Paul Doyle’s match report has landed, so I’ll leave you with that. Thanks for your company - bye!
Related: Manchester City’s Sergio Agüero routs Aston Villa to claim record
6.27pm GMT
That win puts City two points ahead of Leicester, and it wouldn’t be a surprise if they ran away with second place from here.
6.25pm GMT
In other news
Related: Hellas Verona v Genoa delayed due to pitch markings not being straight
6.19pm GMT
That was the last kick of the game. City brutalised an under-strength Villa, and at one stage it looked like the Premier League record victory of 9-0 would be under threat. Instead, Sergio Aguero broke two big records: the most Premier League goals by a foreign player (177, two more than Thierry Henry) and the most hat-tricks by anyone (12, one more than Alan Shearer).
6.17pm GMT
El Ghazi scores emphatically. You can’t call it a consolation goal, really, but it was an excellent penalty.
6.16pm GMT
PENALTY TO VILLA. Gundogan dangles a leg, Trezeguet trips over it and Villa have a penalty, VAR permitting.
6.13pm GMT
87 min Grealish misses a decent chance, hoofing into orbit from the left side of the box.
6.12pm GMT
86 min Villa almost get a non-consolation goal. Trezeguet moves into the area from the right and drills a shot that deflects wide off Gundogan.
6.11pm GMT
85 min City must be so frustrated that they played silly buggers so often in the first half of the season, because they are in awesome form now. If they were even 6-8 points behind Liverpool, we’d have an immense title race in prospect.
6.08pm GMT
It’s Aguero’s 12th hat-trick, one more than Alan Shearer. Villa’s fans were sarcastically oléing as their team passed the ball around in defence. Then Hause gave it straight to Mahrez, who clipped it through to the unmarked Aguero. He ran into the area and battered a close-range shot past Nyland.
6.07pm GMT
Aguero breaks another record, this time for the most Premier League hat-tricks.
6.06pm GMT
80 min Jack Grealish is booked for dissent.
6.05pm GMT
79 min Henri Lansbury comes on for Danny Drinkwater. He didn’t have the full Woodgate, but it was still a debut to forget.
6.04pm GMT
78 min City work the ball across the line of the Villa area. Eventually Foden plays in Gabriel Jesus, whose fierce shot from a tight angle is beaten around the near post by Nyland. From the resulting corner Jesus misses a better chance, sidefooting just wide from 10 yards.
6.02pm GMT
76 min Meanwhile, this will be fun.
Related: Real Madrid v Atlético Madrid: Spanish Supercopa final – live!
6.01pm GMT
75 min “All the talk of Belgian football reminded me of the most spiteful friendly I’ve ever seen, a very workmanlike Belgium against that exquisite Dutch side of the late 1990s,” says Phil Podolsky. “Ended in a five-all draw, and included a Maradona-like slalom from Edgar Davids. What a strange game.”
I vividly recall seeing that score in the Sunday Ti- sorry, in the Observer and assuming it was a cock-up.
6.00pm GMT
74 min Okay, perhaps City have declared at 5-0. The intensity has dropped since De Bruyne went off.
5.58pm GMT
72 min “At the risk of arguing with a joke (“Most competitive league in the world!”, 61 minutes) one thrashing doesn’t make it not true,” says Tom Chivers. “City lost to the worst team in the league earlier this season. Leicester beat Southampton 9-0 away then lost 2-1 at home. If by “most competitive” we mean “anyone can beat anyone” then you could probably argue it. (Except Liverpool. No one can beat them and that is just marvellous so carry on.)”
It’s not worth the trouble of an argument, but I don’t particularly agree. It was far more competitive in the 20th century, and even, briefly, in the mid-2010s. But the other big leagues have been as bad, if not worse. The Bundesliga has been great this year, mind.
5.57pm GMT
71 min City’s final change: Rodri off, Ilkay Gundogan on. And Villa bring on Trezeguet for Conor Hourihane.
5.54pm GMT
69 min City ping the ball around in Villa’s area before Mahrez’s shot from the edge is blocked.
5.50pm GMT
65 min A Villa change: Marvelous Nakamba replaces Douglas Luiz. Lucky him.
5.50pm GMT
64 min Gabriel Jesus’s shot is kicked off the line by Mings. This could end up 10-0.
5.49pm GMT
63 min A double change for City: Nicolas Otamendi and Phil Foden replace Fernandinho and Kevin De Bruyne.
5.48pm GMT
62 min Here’s James Debens, continuing our VARternative history of football. “At the beginning of Chapter 2, after Billy Whitehurst’s volcanic reaction to his goal being disallowed, a human pyramid of Fraser Forster, Peter Crouch, Harry Souttar, Wayne Hennessey, Per Mertesacker, Jan Koller, and Costel Pantilimon is used to fish Martin Atkinson from the floodlights.”
5.47pm GMT
61 min There’s no sign of City declaring at 5-0, and Villa look completely shot mentally. It’s the most competitive league in the world!
5.45pm GMT
60 min “Are the tactical fouls necessary at 4-0?” says David Bertram. “Fernandinho was not playing the ball there.”
He does them on autopilot.
5.45pm GMT
59 min That was Sergio Aguero’s 176th Premier League goal, a new record for a foreign player. Thierry Henry scored 175.
5.44pm GMT
This is hard to watch. David Silva finds an eye in the needle, sliding a fine pass between two defenders for Aguero. He moves across the area, away from Mings, and passes the ball into the corner. It took a slight deflection off Mings but it was going in anyway.
5.42pm GMT
56 min Aguero shoots straight at Nyland from 20 yards.
5.41pm GMT
55 min This win will move City above Leicester and into second, just 14 poi- no, let’s not go there.
5.40pm GMT
54 min “Being Belgian I have followed Kevin... for the last 12 years,” says Herman de latte. “He is close to the top of his development... he will bring Belgium the next European Championship.”
There’s a good case for him being Belgium’s greatest ever player. I’d put him above Scifo, probably above Hazard and maybe Ceulemans. It’s harder to compare him with Kompany, Gerets and Pfaff I suppose.
5.39pm GMT
53 min El Ghazi is booked for leaving an arm on someone.
5.38pm GMT
51 min Aguero fouls Grealish, prompting an exchange of views and shoves between the two. No yellow cards.
5.36pm GMT
50 min Fernandino does what he does best, flattening Jack Grealish to stop a Villa counter-attack and earn a yellow card.
5.34pm GMT
49 min “I watched a lot of Mahrez in the miracle season hoping Leicester would drop points (us Gooners),” says Drew Lundgren. “I thought he had at least 10 penalties that weren’t called. I think Leicester could have won the title by 20 points with VAR.”
Someone should write the VARternative History of Football. In Chapter 1, Billy Whitehurst learns that his first goal in 22 games is being checked for a possible handball.
5.32pm GMT
48 min “City are exceptional but Villa, Jesus wept,” weeps Niall Mullen. “If Danny Drinkwater is the answer I want to know what the question is.”
He was so good in Leicester’s title-winning team as well. Hopefully it’s just rust rather than (professional) rigor mortis.
5.32pm GMT
47 min No changes on either side, since you asked.
5.31pm GMT
46 min Peep peep! Villa begin the second half.
5.30pm GMT
“Interestingly, Pep really only seems to struggle with free spirits and lapses in attackers,” says Joe Harvey. “He got the very best out of Dani Alves (perhaps the freest spirit to play the game) and continues to tolerate Kyle Walker and Ederson. It’s interesting - maybe forwards just don’t expect to have such detailed defensive jobs, and struggle a bit?”
This is really a question for one for the Guardian Sport SuperBrains, but to my peasant eye it’s more about individualism. He doesn’t care for people who pick the wrong passes, or don’t pass at all, which doesn’t really apply to his best full-backs.
5.28pm GMT
Half-time reading
Jose’s bored already, isn’t he.
Related: Spurs fans should fear four years of Mourinho’s small-minded cynicism | Jonathan Liew
5.22pm GMT
The upside of City being out of the title race is that they can just relax and play. They ended last season, when the stakes were so high, with a series of hard-fought one-goal victories. I suspect they will administer plenty of towellings between now and May.
5.19pm GMT
That was another demonstration of Kevin De Bruyne’s rare genius. He didn’t put the ball into an area; he looked up while he was on the run, processed where Jesus and the defenders were, and played the appropriate pass. He couldn’t have drawn it any more accurately.
5.17pm GMT
Four. Kevin De Bruyne, on the right, puts in a glorious low pass - you can’t call it a cross - that is finished from close range by Gabriel Jesus.
5.15pm GMT
45 min “The decision to play Danny Drinkwater was questionable before the game,” says Stephen Carr. “Now it looks like utter madness. He’s so far off the pace it’s untrue.”
I feel a bit sorry for him. I doubt we’ll see him in the second half.
5.15pm GMT
44 min There’s an example of why Pep hasn’t always been a fan of Riyad Mahrez. He leads a City break, three on two from a Villa corner, but holds on to the ball too long and the chance is lost.
5.11pm GMT
41 min After a patient move, Villa’s best of the match, El Ghazi cuts back inside Joao Cancelo and sprays a rising shot just wide of the far post. Ederson had it covered but it was a good effort.
5.09pm GMT
40 min Villa’s next three Premier League games are Brighton (A), Watford (H) and Bournemouth (A). That’s the real quiz.
5.08pm GMT
38 min David Silva curls a free-kick this far wide from 20 yards. The City fans cheered, thinking it had gone in.
5.06pm GMT
36 min “As a Leicester fan, I’ve seen Mahrez shimmy in from the right wing loads of times,” says Martin Sinclair. “You know what’s coming but sometimes you just can’t stop it. I thought he was a great signing for City precisely because he is a bit different to everyone else. When City are desperate for a goal, he can create one out of nothing.”
I agree – he has a touch of genius, in mine – but Pep Guardiola hasn’t generally got on well with free spirits. I thought he really missed a trick by not playing Mahrez against Andy Robertson at Anfield.
5.05pm GMT
35 min This is getting embarrassing. Aguero misses a good chance to make it 4-0, rifling just over the bar after Mings makes a desperate tackle on Joao Cancelo.
5.01pm GMT
31 min “Can we stop this now?” says David Bertram. “Drinkwater looks like a budget Ashley Westwood. What’s Big Sam up to? Having McGinn, Heston and Wesley out is unfortunate but a striker was needed and not having someone lined up is criminal.”
On the plus side, you’re only one game away from a Carabao Cup agains- oh.
4.59pm GMT
For the second time this week, City go 3-0 up in the first half of an away game. De Bruyne beats Drinkwater with ease and finds Aguero, whose scorching 20-yard shot goes through the hands of the leaping Nyland.
4.58pm GMT
28 min Villa have hardly had a kick in the last 15 minutes.
4.57pm GMT
26 min Gabriel Jesus stabs over the bar after a superb turn in the area.
4.55pm GMT
Riyad Mahrez gets his second! Poor Danny Drinkwater, making his Villa debut, is having a bit of a nightmare. He dithered in his own area and was robbed by David Silva, whose touch diverted the close across the area. It bounced up nicely for Mahrez, who smacked it past Nyland with the minimum of fuss.
4.53pm GMT
23 min The pattern of the game - City passing the ball hither and thither - suited Villa when the match was goalless. At 0-1, not so much.
4.52pm GMT
21 min Riyad Mahrez’s Manchester City career has been a mixed bag, and the feeling persists that he isn’t quite a Pep Guardiola player. But when he’s good, he’s often awesome.
4.49pm GMT
Mahrez is such a beautiful player. He received Aguero’s pass, 40 yards from goal on the right wing, and went straight at the backpedalling Villa defence. Drinkwater was the first to attempt a tackle on the edge of the area. Mahrez cut back inside him, used sleight of hip to throw Hause off balance without touching the ball and then dragged a disguised finish past Nyland at the near post.
4.47pm GMT
Riyad Mahrez gives City the lead with a brilliant individual goal!
4.47pm GMT
16 min De Bruyne and David Silva combine to find Aguero on the right side of the area, but he slips in the act of shooting. He might have been assisted by a little push from Hause, though it wasn’t enough for VAR to get involved.
4.45pm GMT
15 min De Bruyne stabs an awesome pass, like the sudden thrust of a dagger, to take three Villa players out of the game and find Mahrez in the area. He tries to come back inside Hause and is dispossessed. The pass, though; the pass.
4.43pm GMT
13 min Villa will be pretty happy with how the game has started. Although City have had most of the ball, Orjan Nyland has had the square root of sod all to do.
4.42pm GMT
12 min Joao Cancelo’s dangerous low cross towards Jesus is superbly defended by Konsa, sliding towards his own goal.
4.38pm GMT
8 min Mendy fizzes a square pass to his fellow full back, Joao Cancelo. He gets the ball out of his feet and then smashes it well wide from 25 yards.
4.35pm GMT
6 min It’s been a scruffy start to the game, with City yet to get into their passing rhythm.
4.33pm GMT
3 min City are playing a 4-3-3, with Jesus as the left-sided attacker. Villa have started with Anwar El Ghazi and Jack Grealish as an unlikely front pair.
4.31pm GMT
39 seconds El Ghazi, near the penalty spot, heads well wide from Elmohamady’s cross.
4.30pm GMT
1 min Peep peep! City kick off from right to left. They are in their black away strip; Villa are wearing claret and blue.
4.29pm GMT
The players emerge from the tunnel on a crisp afternoon in Aston. This looks like a nigh-on impossible ask for Villa, who are without so many important players.
4.19pm GMT
“Is Pep trying to sabotage Fantasy Football teams?” says Chris Tavernos. “No Sterling (my captain) again?”
Some people say there was a world before Fantasy Football banter, but I’ll be damned if I can remember it. And I knew I should have bought Mahrez this week.
3.54pm GMT
Watford have thumped Bournemouth 3-0 in the early game. It’s their fourth win in six league games under Nigel Pearson, and they are already out of the relegation zone. Scenes, and then some.
Related: Bournemouth v Watford: Premier League – live!
3.41pm GMT
Pre-match reading
Related: Manchester City’s flaws have been exposed but singular brilliance remains | Jonathan Wilson
Related: Phil Foden can fill David Silva’s shoes at Manchester City says Pep Guardiola
3.41pm GMT
Pep Guardiola has rested a few players, including Kyle Walker, Raheem Sterling and Bernardo Silva. I think City will play 4-3-3 with Gabriel Jesus wide left, though most team news providers have them in a 3-4-2-1.
Villa’s formation looks like 3-5-1-1.
10.28am GMT
Now, here’s a first: it’s mid-January, and Pep Guardiola is out of the title race. That doesn’t really compute, given the absurd excellence of his Barcelona, Bayern Munich and Manchester City teams, and it will be interesting to see how he responds. Most managers would prioritise the three available cup competitions, especially the Champions League, but Pep the perfectionist prefers to win every game regardless of context. I bet he’s fun at Tiddlywinks parties.
On the face of it this means a lot more to Aston Villa, who will start the match in the relegation zone if Watford finish the job at Bournemouth. Villa have played pretty well against the big teams - nobody has come closer to beating Liverpool in the league - but don’t have many points to show for it. Yet.
Continue reading...Brighton 0-4 Arsenal: Women's Super League – as it happened
Arsenal re-established their three point lead over Manchester City at the top of the WSL, with Beth Mead rounding off a comfortable win
3.17pm GMT
Related: Van de Donk sets tone as Arsenal move clear at top of WSL with rout of Brighton
2.28pm GMT
Peep peep! Arsenal restore their three-point lead at the top of the WSL with the usual 4-0 victory over Brighton. They were too slick, too confident, too much for the home side, who were never really in the game. Danielle van de Donk, Jill Roord, Jordan Nobbs and Beth Mead got the goals to give Arsenal a perfect start to their busy week. Thanks for your company - bye!
2.27pm GMT
90+4 min Miedema misses an excellent chance to make it 5-0, lobbing over the outrushing Walsh but also the crossbar.
2.25pm GMT
90+1 min Four minutes of added time.
2.24pm GMT
90 min If it stays like this it will be Arsenal’s third consecutive 4-0 win over Brighton in the WSL. And the match before that ended 4-1.
2.23pm GMT
Beth Mead makes it 4-0. Walsh fumbled a cross from Walti and then, in her desperation to redeem the error, brought Maier down. The referee was in the process of awarding a penalty when Mead put the loose ball into the net.
2.21pm GMT
86 min Not long now. The last 20 minutes have been a non-event.
2.16pm GMT
83 min A loose ball breaks to Barton, who batters it into orbit from 20 yards.
2.14pm GMT
80 min The match is petering out. In truth, it was over when Jill Roord made it 2-0 in the 32nd minute.
2.13pm GMT
79 min And now Brighton make their final change, with Lea Le Garrec replaced by Ini-Abasi Umotong.
2.10pm GMT
76 min A double change for Arsenal. Leah Williamson and Jordan Nobbs, who were both superb, are replaced by Katie McCabe and Leonie Maier.
2.08pm GMT
74 min A dodgy pass from Williamson goes straight to Green. She turns, looks up ... and has almost no support. That’s been the case all afternoon.
2.06pm GMT
70 min This must be pretty demoralising for Brighton, who have spent almost all of the match in Arsenal’s slipstream.
2.00pm GMT
66 min A substitution apiece. Beth Mead comes on for Arsenal, with the reliably excellent Kim Little going off. And Megan Connolly replaces Emily Simpkins for Brighton.
1.59pm GMT
66 min “Picking up the score at a motorway service station, where (First World Problem Alert!) their notion of a cortado leaves much to be desired, I see that Arsenal are well ahead - no surprise there - but that Miedema hasn’t scored yet,” says Charles Antaki. “What’s gone wrong, Rob?”
She’s hardly touched the ball. Not that she has needed to – she even made the third with a dummy.
1.58pm GMT
65 min Zinsberger, possibly out of boredom, goes charging out of her area to block Whelan’s cross.
1.57pm GMT
63 min A quarter-chance for Brighton, with the under-pressure Williams heading wide from a corner.
1.55pm GMT
61 min Nothing much to report since the third goal. The intensity hasn’t really dropped, even though both teams know the match is over.
1.53pm GMT
57 min Brighton would surely settle for this scoreline. Arsenal could easily score two or three more.
1.47pm GMT
54 min “Hi Rob,” says Håkan Burden. “Ever since Arsenal won against Göteborg in 2012 I’ve had a soft spot for the Gunners. At least in the WSL. Press and Asante were playing for Göteborg in those days, makes you wonder if the smaller nations and leagues will be able to compete in the long run against England, Germany and France?”
Good question. I fear not, for all the usual reasons, but I’d imagine there will be a bit more equality than in the men’s game.
1.46pm GMT
This is a lovely team goal, finished off by Jordan Nobbs. van de Donk’s low ball from the left was dummied beautifully on the edge of the area by Miedema and ran through to Nobbs. She controlled the ball on the run and drilled it through the legs of Walsh.
1.44pm GMT
51 min Arsenal have two huge league games coming up - Chelsea at home next weekend, and Manchester City away on 2 February.
1.43pm GMT
50 min After some patient passing from Arsenal, Little’s shot from the edge of the area is blocked.
1.41pm GMT
47 min “Arsenal certainly seem to know how to play with the handbrake off,” says Bill Hargreaves. “Front to back class in that team, and they seem to fit like clockwork.”
Indeed. They have the relaxed certainty of champions.
1.39pm GMT
46 min Peep peep! Arsenal begin the second half. A win today would restore their three-point lead at the top of the WSL. Brighton have made a half-time change, with Kate Natkiel replacing Amanda Nilden.
1.35pm GMT
Half-time chitchat
“Noticing some new fans on the MBM,” says Nic. “They might well be interested to know that most of the WSL games are shown live for free on the FA Player. Some of the games are shown live by BT Sport or the BBC, these are then not shown live to people logging in from the UK. The quality of these games is still below the men’s game but they often throw up some close 1-0, 2-1 scorelines so that they can still be very entertaining.”
1.21pm GMT
Peep peep! The league leaders Arsenal are in control at Crawley after a slick, authoritative first-half performance. Danielle van de Donk and Jill Roord scored excellent goals, and they could be further ahead. See you in 10 minutes for the second half.
1.19pm GMT
45+1 min And now a great chance for Brighton! Whelan, on the right, plays a superb through ball to find Simpkins just inside the area. She controls the ball on the run but sprays her shot wide of the near post.
1.18pm GMT
45+1 min Arsenal almost finish Brighton off on the break. van de Donk slides a precise ball across the edge of the area to Nobbs, who gets it out of her feet and drives just wide.
1.18pm GMT
45 min Roord is booked for a spiteful tackle on Kayleigh Green.
1.16pm GMT
43 min Zinsberger has definitely touched the ball now. She did very well to hurry across her goal to palm Whelan’s brilliant right-wing cross away from danger.
1.15pm GMT
42 min I’m sure Manuela Zinsberger has touched the ball, but I’m honestly struggling to recall her doing so.
1.09pm GMT
37 min After yet another incision down the Arsenal right, this time from Evans, Nobbs clips a first-time shot that is well saved by Walsh.
1.09pm GMT
36 min Beautiful play from Arsenal. van de Donk flicks the ball behind her standing leg to Nobbs, who stabs it towards Miedema in the area. To widespread surprise, she slices her shot well wide. That was a great chance.
1.08pm GMT
35 min “Hi there Rob,” says Kevin in Clonakilty. “Delighted to see a women’s game covered live. Can’t say I know much about the WPL but will know a lot more by the end of the game. My three 11-year-old triplet girls wholeheartedly agree.”
If they’re looking for a hero, Katie McCabe is a good place to start.
1.07pm GMT
Inevitably, it was created down the right. Williamson, who also made the first goal as well, curled a long cross-pass into the path of Roord, who made an excellent run off Le Garrec. She controlled the ball just inside the area and finished emphatically into the bottom corner.
1.05pm GMT
Jill Roord doubles Arsenal’s lead with a fine finish.
1.02pm GMT
29 min Nobbs and Evans are causing so manyh problems down the Arsenal right. Nobbs wins the ball high up the field and crosses towards the near post, where Miedema’s snapshot goes over the bar.
12.58pm GMT
26 min Brighton have been better in the last few minutes, interrupting Arsenal’s passing game with some strong challenges.
12.56pm GMT
You can tell there was a game here yesterday too... pic.twitter.com/ziNRaBzMjv
12.55pm GMT
23 min We haven’t seen possession statistics, but it feels like Arsenal have had at least 70 per cent. The one thing that will please Brighton is that their goalkeeper Megan Walsh hasn’t had a huge amount of work to do.
12.53pm GMT
21 min See 14 min.
12.50pm GMT
18 min Miedema almost makes it 2-0. She has two close-range shots blocked - the first, crucially, by Kerkdijk I think.
12.49pm GMT
16 min “Fear not, Rob, you have at least one reader,” says Siddhant Lazar.
Ah, well isn’t that nice. It makes it all worthwhile. Sorry, what’s that you say, Siddhant?
12.48pm GMT
14 min Brighton have a good home record this season, and beat an admittedly under-strength Arsenal on penalties in the group stage of the Continental Cup, but at the moment they are being outclassed.
12.44pm GMT
12 min Nobbs’ cross-shot from a tight angle is palmed away by Walsh. Brighton are hanging on desperately to their 1-0 deficit.
12.42pm GMT
10 min Anyone out there? Eh?
12.41pm GMT
8 min That was almost 2-0 to Arsenal. Evans’ low cross from the right was miskicked by Nobbs and ran through to Roord, whose low shot was half blocked by Kerkdijk. The ball looped back towards goal and was grabbed by the diving Walsh.
12.40pm GMT
6 min It’s all Arsenal. Their unusual formation - it looks like a 3-3-3-1, or a 3-1-2-3-1 if you want to go full hipster - means they have a lot of ball players in the team, and at the moment Brighton are struggling to get possession.
12.36pm GMT
That didn’t take long. Williamson drives a brilliant crossfield pass to release van de Donk on the left. She surges into the area, eases Barton out of the way and places the ball past Walsh from close range. That was far too easy.
12.35pm GMT
2 min It looks like Arsenal are using a back three, although it’s hard to work out their formation as they seem to be playing without winbg-backs. Schanderbeck and Williamson aer almost playing as full-back, with Louise Quinn as the only central defender.
12.32pm GMT
1 min Peep peep! Brighton kick off from left to right. They are in blue and white stripes; Arsenal are in yellow.
12.04pm GMT
Some pre-ma tch reading
Related: ‘The men were screaming. They made me feel I should not be a referee’
11.38am GMT
Brighton (4-1-4-1) Walsh; Barton, Kerkdijk, Williams, Gibbons; Simpkins; Whelan, Bowman, Le Garrce, Nilden; Green.
Substitutes: Harris, Roe, Lundorf, Hack, Connolly, Natkiel, Umotong.
Arsenal (3-4-3) Zinsberger; Williamson, Quinn, Schanderbeck; Nobbs, Walti, Little, Roord; Evans, Miedema, van de Donk.
Substitutes: Peyraud-Magnin, Maier, McCabe, Filis, Grant, Mead.
11.16am GMT
Hello and welcome to live coverage of Brighton v Arsenal from Crawley. The venue has changed but it’s still Brighton away, which means an overload of happy memories for Arsenal supporters. Their team clinched last season’s title – their first since 2012 - with a 4-0 win at the Amex Stadium.
There’s a long way to go in this year’s title race, but a win today feels almost as important. The Big Three have set a blistering pace at the top of the WSL, with Arsenal ahead of Manchester City on alphabetical order, and the margin for error is almost non-existent.
Continue reading...January 11, 2020
Leicester 1-2 Southampton, Manchester United 4-0 Norwich and more – as it happened
Southampton exorcised some demons with victory at Leicester, while Marcus Rashford scored twice on his 200th Man Utd appearance
5.15pm GMT
That’s it for today’s clockwatch. Please join Scott Murray for live coverage of Tottenham 1-4 Liverpool. Goodnight!
Related: Tottenham v Liverpool: Premier League – live!
5.11pm GMT
Related: Battling Southampton cap comeback with late winner from Danny Ings
5.09pm GMT
Related: Callum Hudson-Odoi sets seal on win for ruthless Chelsea over Burnley
5.03pm GMT
“On the subject of big turnarounds,” says Fred Ixer, “Ipswich lost 10-1 to Fulham on Boxing Day 1963 and beat them 4-2 two days later.”
5.02pm GMT
Tottenham v Liverpool Jose Mourinho has given 20-year-old defender Japhet Tanganga his Premier League debut against the best team in the world. Get the rest of the team news with Scott Murray.
Related: Tottenham v Liverpool: Premier League – live!
5.01pm GMT
Jamie Jackson’s match report from Old Trafford
Related: Manchester United thump Norwich as Marcus Rashford celebrates in style
5.00pm GMT
Peep peep! Crikey, that was eventful. These are the final scores in our featured matches
Premier League
4.58pm GMT
Championship Ben Watson has scored a 96th-minute winner for promotion-chasing Nottingham Forest at Reading. No he hasn’t: Reading have equalised from the kick off!
4.57pm GMT
“Has there ever been a 10-goal turnaround across two fixtures?” asks Dennis Mumby.
There has indeed. In 1994-95, Ipswich beat Man Utd 3-2 at Portman Road and lost 9-0 at Old Trafford. I think Wigan beat Chelsea 3-1 and then lost 8-0 in 2009-10 as well, though would need to check.
4.55pm GMT
A superb result for Newcastle, who lost two more players to injury in the first half.
4.55pm GMT
Another win for Everton, their third in four Premier League games under Carlo Ancelotti.
4.54pm GMT
A glorious and deserved win for Southampton, who exorcised that 9-0 defeat with a quite wonderful performance at the King Power Stadium. Bravo.
4.52pm GMT
Chelsea move to within six points of second place after an easy win over Burnley.
4.51pm GMT
Atdhe Nuhiu completes a memorable win for Wednesday, and especially for their manager Garry Monk.
4.50pm GMT
Manchester United kept up their excellent home form (not counting the
mezzanine
Carabao Cup) with a thumping win over Norwich.
4.49pm GMT
“As a Liverpool fan I’ve no preference towards other teams in the league but I do really respect how Southampton put their season back together after that 9-0,” says Chris Kempshall. “The way they’ve played their way out of trouble and stuck by the manager & players is genuinely admirable.”
I couldn’t agree more. I’m really happy for Ralph Hassenhuttl in particular; he seems a very likeable, principled bloke.
4.47pm GMT
NO GOAL! Leicester 1-2 Southampton Yes, it has been disallowed for offside. Lordy, what a game.
4.47pm GMT
I think this is goingto be disallowed for offside. It’s VARmpit time again.
4.44pm GMT
Jacob Murphy has picked Leeds’ pocket in the Yorkshire derby!
4.43pm GMT
Wolves 1-1 Newcastle Steve Bruce’s injury-shredded side are eight minutes away from an admirable draw at Molineux.
4.42pm GMT
“Can I offer the Allen family?” says Martyn Lunn. “Les Allen, son Clive Allen, nephew Paul Allen, brother Dennis Allen....”
4.41pm GMT
Leicester 1-2 Southampton Kasper Schmeichel makes a brilliant save from Danny Ings to keep Leicester in the game! In the context of that 9-0 defeat, this is one of the performances of the season from Southampton.
4.40pm GMT
It’s also there!
4.40pm GMT
It’s there!
4.39pm GMT
The ludicrously in-form Danny Ings has given Southampton a deserved lead at Leicester! They have been fantastic all afternoon, hell-bent on redemption for that 9-0 humiliation, and now they are ahead.
4.37pm GMT
Marcus Browne has pulled one back for Oxford. Thanks for all your father/son suggestions, by the way, which I’m looking at when not distracted by live association football.
4.36pm GMT
Everton 1-0 Brighton Dominic Calvert-Lewin has a goal disallowed by VAR for handball.
4.35pm GMT
Related: Tottenham v Liverpool: Premier League – live!
4.35pm GMT
He’s back (part 48)
Related: European roundup: Zlatan Ibrahimovic scores as Milan ease past Cagliari
4.34pm GMT
The latest scores in our featured matches
Premier League
4.34pm GMT
Crewe have had plenty of the game, but they are facing defeat after a third goal from Danny Rose.
4.33pm GMT
The substitute Mason Greenwood gets his ninth goal of a memorable season, driving past Tim Krul from outside the area with typical precision.
4.31pm GMT
Crewe were level for only eight minutes. Jerry Yates has put the leaders Swindon back in front.
4.30pm GMT
“Hi Rob,” says John Barry. “If you’re looking for a pair that could be better than the Maldinis, then the Mazzolas - Valentino and Sandro - are probably a good bet.”
Now that’s a good shout.
4.30pm GMT
“Didn’t Eidur Gudjohnsen come on as a sub for his dad when making his debut for Iceland?” asks Gary Naylor.
20 years ago today this happened... Iceland debut replacing my father!!
Commentator really excited #fatherandson pic.twitter.com/lx0bPDR0pi
4.28pm GMT
An important equaliser for Crewe at wherever it is Swindon play. Is it still the County Ground? Whatever it’s called, the Norwegian Chuma Anene has scored there.
4.24pm GMT
“Umm,” says Craig Macdonald, “the Charltons spring to mind...”
Who’s the daddy?
4.24pm GMT
Leicester 1-1 Southampton Now Leicester have had a goal disallowed for offside against Jonny Evans.
4.23pm GMT
Scottish Championship It’s now Patrick 0-4 Dundee Utd, with Lawrence Shankland getting his third hat-trick of the season.
4.21pm GMT
Leicester 1-1 Southampton: no penalty Shane Long was adjudged offside by VAR.
4.20pm GMT
Leicester 1-1 Southampton A penalty has been given to Southampton, but it may be reversed for offside against Shane Long. We’re into VARmpit territory.
4.19pm GMT
Leicester 1-1 Southampton Stuart Armstrong misses another decent chance for Southampton, who by all counts have been quite brilliant today. There’s a lot more than three points on offer for them.
4.19pm GMT
The latest scores in our featured matches
Premier League
4.18pm GMT
“Obviously,” says Mac Millings, “the best father-son combo is Papa Dadson, last seen in the colours of F.C. Lumezzane. He’s football’s Miandad.”
4.17pm GMT
Man Utd 3-0 Norwich Brandon Williams has missed a great chance to make it 4-0. And Marcus Rashford has been replaced by Daniel James; it sounds like an injury precaution.
4.16pm GMT
“I would like to add the Laudrup family, with father Finn and brothers Michael and Brian, to the glorious pantheon of footballing families,” says Claus Strøander.
Never heard of them.
4.14pm GMT
“Partick Thistle 0-2 Dundee United, Stenhousemuir 0-1 Brechin,” says Simon McMahon of matters in Scotland. “As for footballing families, Roy and Rocky Race take some beating.”
4.14pm GMT
Everton 1-0 Brighton Leandro Trossard hits the bar for Brighton with a fierce strike.
4.13pm GMT
“Father/son combo,” says Redmond Grimes. “Surely Micky and Eden Hazard are worth a mention?”
4.12pm GMT
Talking of Johan Cruyff, Hal Robson-Kanu has given West Brom the lead against Charlton in the first minute of the second half. His shot took a decisive deflection off Naby Sarr, and I doubt anyone connected with West Brom could care less about that.
4.11pm GMT
Two in three minutes for United. Anthony Martial seals victory over Norwich with a smart header from Juan Mata’s cross.
4.09pm GMT
Callum Hudson-Odoi scores his first Premier League goal to seal a rareish home victory for Chelsea.
4.08pm GMT
Another one for Rashnaldo. Tim Krul gives away a needless/dodgy (delete as appropriate) penalty by fouling Brandon Williams, and Marcus Rashford whacks it through Krul’s hands.
4.06pm GMT
“In my humble opinion as an Ajax fan, it may be hard to beat Danny/Daley Blind for best father/son duo,” says Stefan Lutter. “Patrick and Justin Kluivert are another good one, though probably not in the running for top position.”
As an Ajax fan, doesn’t the father of modern football come to mind?
4.05pm GMT
Leicester 1-1 Southampton The away side really should be ahead. Jack Stephens has had a shot cleared off the line by Caglar Soyuncu at the start of the second half.
4.03pm GMT
“Is Rashford,” says Duncan Edwards, “turning into a version of Ronaldo?”
Heh. There are similarities in their goalscoring pattern, this season being Rashford’s equivalent of the Ronaldo jump in 2006-07. If he’s still scoring hat-tricks in 2032-33, having won umpteen Champions Leagues, we should talk some more.
4.00pm GMT
“Perhaps an easy one to suggest being a Chelsea supporter, but could it be argued the Lampards have a strong case at the father/son combo?” says Alec Frost. “Furthermore, nice to see Chelsea taking the lead - perhaps the many problem with this awful home form has been allowing the other team the first goal that they can sit in and defend. Then again, this season we’ve managed to scare ourselves a few times whilst having a comfortable grasp of the game (my mind thinks of Watford).”
I was going to say there was never any chance of Burnley winning away to one of the Big Six, then I remembered that mess at Stamford Bridge two seasons ago.
3.58pm GMT
Here’s Malcolm Shuttleworth on the subject of father/son combos. “My father played for Ashton United in the 50s,” he says, “and I was top scorer for my team in the Newbury and District Sunday League for five years running in the 80s. Does that count?”
3.57pm GMT
Championship You can read all about promotion-desiring Brentford’s 3-1 win over QPR right here.
Related: Early Brentford blitz blows away QPR and keeps Bees in the hunt
3.56pm GMT
I thought it was half-time at the Kassam Stadium. In fact they were still playing injury time, and Richard Wood scored to give Rotherham an improbable 3-0 lead. Oxford had kept seven consecutive clean sheets at home in the league.
3.50pm GMT
Half-time reading
Related: Tranmere and Rochdale’s TV snub suggests FA Cup replays have had their day | Paul Wilson
3.50pm GMT
Peep peep! These are the half-time scores in our featured matches:
Premier League
3.48pm GMT
13 - Tammy Abraham has scored 13 Premier League goals for Chelsea this season - Frank Lampard is the only Englishman to score more in a single campaign in the competition for the club (3 occasions). Exalted. #CHEBUR pic.twitter.com/KnirAylWBR
3.47pm GMT
“What do you make of Mata’s career with United?” says Phil Podolsky. “After two good season with Chelsea there was talk of him being one of the Great Spanish Midfielders, though personally I’ve always thought that was a slight exaggeration.”
I have plenty of sympathy for him, because he never really had a run as a No10, but it hasn’t quite happened. He was the right player at the wrong time. There have still been loads of lovely moments of unobtrusive class - I love this pass - and that double at Anfield.
3.44pm GMT
Leicester 1-1 Southampton Danny Ings has hit the bar twice in two minutes for Southampton, who are giving Leicester a helluva game.
3.41pm GMT
Serie A Zlatan Ibrahimovic, 92, has scored his first goal since returning to AC Milan to put them 2-0 up at Cagliari.
3.40pm GMT
The latest scores in our featured matches
Premier League
3.40pm GMT
Chelsea are cruising to victory. Reece James crosses superbly for Tammy Abraham, whose downward header takes a strange bounce and beats Nick Pope.
3.39pm GMT
Everton may have been humiliated by Liverpool Under-4s in the FA Cup last weekend, but their Premier League form is terrific. Richarlison has given them the lead against Brighton with a fine goal.
3.38pm GMT
Yes, yes, I missed his first goal, but never mind that because Kyle Vassell has lobbed Rotherham into a two-goal lead at Oxford. As things stand, they are top of League One!
3.37pm GMT
Rob Hunt has given Swindon the lead in their top-of-the-table clash.
3.36pm GMT
“I know I’m getting old and on the downslide,” says Lee Smith, “but surely Marcus Rashford hasn’t accumulated 200 appearances for Man Utd already?”
He surely has, although a third of them have been as a sub.
3.33pm GMT
Josh Davison’s excellent header brings Charlton level against West Brom.
3.32pm GMT
Leicester 1-1 Southampton Jamie Vardy, 33 today, has had a goal rightly disallowed for offside.
3.31pm GMT
Wolves 1-1 Newcastle Another injury for Newcastle! Dwight Gayle has gone off, replaced by Christian Atsu. Newcastle lost four players in the first 47 minutes of their last Premier League game; now they’ve lost another two inside half an hour. I’m struggling to think of a precedent for such misfortune.
3.29pm GMT
“After watching Kasper Schmeichel make a stunning, point-blank save against an in-form Danny Ings, I got to thinking: are the Schmeichels the best-ever father/son combo?” says Hubert O’Hearn. “At the least, Kasper has been in the top three goalkeepers for five seasons while his Dad dominated his era. Who else is there? Ian Wright was brilliant, but was Shaun ever in a top-three forward list? The Redknapps? Not really. Fun subject to consider on a rainy Saturday.”
So it is. The Cloughs and Cruyffs were also competent, although off the top of my head I’d pick the Maldinis as the best father/son combo.
3.28pm GMT
Marcus Rashford marks his 200th appearance for Manchester United with a goal, finishing confidently from Juan Mata’s cross.
3.27pm GMT
Jorginho scores with ease. The penalty was a bit iffy, by all accounts.
3.26pm GMT
Chelsea 0-0 Burnley Chelsea have been given a penalty for a foul on Willian.
3.26pm GMT
Kenneth Zohore has given promotion-chasing West Brom the lead at the Valley.
3.25pm GMT
Sunderland are giving the leaders Wycombe one hell of a beating.
3.21pm GMT
The latest scores in our featured matches
Premier League
3.20pm GMT
Chelsea 0-0 Burnley: no goal! VAR has upheld that offside decision at Stamford Bridge, so the score remains 0-0.
3.20pm GMT
Stuart Armstong brings Southampton level at the King Power Stadium! His shot took a deflection and beat Kasper Schmeichel.
3.19pm GMT
Sunderland double their lead at the Stadium of Light.
3.18pm GMT
Chelsea 0-0 Burnley Jeff Hendrick has had a goal disallowed for offside, but it’s being checked by VAR.
3.16pm GMT
Poor marking from Newcastle allows Leander Dendoncker to bring Wolves level with a close-range volley from a corner.
3.14pm GMT
Leicester, who won 9-0 at St Mary’s earlier in the season, are ahead. Jamie Vardy was the provider this time, superbly making the goal for Dennis Praet.
3.12pm GMT
Wolves 0-1 Newcastle This is absurd. Newcastle have suffered yet another injury, with Paul Dummett limping off to be replaced by Florian Lejeune.
3.09pm GMT
Sunderland are ahead against the League One leaders. Charlie Wyke ends a fine move, sliding home from Lynden Gooch’s cross.l
3.08pm GMT
The in-form Miguel Almiron rifles past Rui Patricio to give Newcastle an early lead at Molineux!
3.07pm GMT
Everton 0-0 Brighton Everton have been denied what was apparently a clear penalty after a foul by Webster on Walcott. VAR! what it is good for, etc.
3.05pm GMT
“Another Scottish football update: my son was on the 11.20 Málaga - Edinburgh Ryanair flight along with the Hibernian squad,” says Joe Sampson. “He can confirm that their behaviour was exemplary.”
I assume they will take collective responsibility for their shameful actions.
3.00pm GMT
Manchester United 0-0 Norwich United made a late change to their substitutes, with Tahith Chong replacing former footballer Luke Shaw. He injured a hamstring in the warm-up.
2.59pm GMT
Peep peep! It’s Saturday, it’s 3pm, it’s soccer o’clock.
2.49pm GMT
“Afternoon Rob,” says Simon McMahon. “Beautiful day for football up in Scotland, with heavy rain and gale force winds just about everywhere. With nearest challengers Inverness having their game rained off, Scottish Championship leaders Dundee United travel to Partick Thistle looking to extend their 14-point lead at the top. New signing and former MLS Rookie of the Year Austin, sorry Dillon, Powers goes straight into the squad. Groovy, baby. In Scottish League One game of the day is East Fife v Airdrieonians, and in Scottish League Two the bottom two meet as Brechin, two points behind, travel to face Stenhousemuir.”
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE FUNNY GOALKEEPERS.
2.39pm GMT
Crystal Palace 1-1 Arsenal Here’s Nick Ames’ report from Selhurst Park.
Related: Crystal Palace’s Jordan Ayew earns draw and Arsenal’s Aubameyang sees red
2.32pm GMT
Championship Third-placed Brentford beat QPR 3-1 in the lunchtime game. The match was over after 33 minutes, when Ollie Watkins scored his 18th goal of the season to put Brentford 3-0 up.
2.26pm GMT
The early Premier League game has finished Crystal Palace 1-1 Arsenal. Scott Murray has more.
Related: Crystal Palace v Arsenal: Premier League – live!
2.20pm GMT
Wolves v Newcastle team news
Wolves (3-4-2-1) Rui Patricio; Dendoncker, Coady, Saiss; Doherty, Moutinho, Neves, Jonny; Traore, Neto; Jimenez.
Substitutes: Ruddy, Buur, Bennett, Vinagre, Kilman, Gibbs-White, Ashley-Seal.
2.16pm GMT
Man Utd v Norwich City team news
Man Utd (4-2-3-1) de Gea; Wan-Bissaka, Lindelof, Maguire, Williams; Fred, Matic; Mata, Pereira, Rashford; Martial.
Substitutes: Grant, Jones, Dalot, Chong, James, Greenwood, Gomes.
Related: Ole Gunnar Solskjær prepares to spend on ‘short-term fix’ at Manchester United
Related: Why Manchester United can’t see the Woodward for the trees | Barney Ronay
2.12pm GMT
Leicester v Southampton team news
Leicester (4-1-4-1) Schmeichel; Ricardo, Evans, Soyuncu, Chilwell; Choudhury; Perez, Praet, Maddison, Barnes; Vardy.
Substitutes: Ward, Justin, Benkovic, Gray, Tielemans, Albrighton, Iheanacho.
2.09pm GMT
Everton v Brighton team news
Everton (4-4-2) Pickford; Sidibe, Keane, Holgate, Digne; Walcott, Davies, Sigurdsson, Bernard; Calvert-Lewin, Richarlison.
Substitutes: Lossl, Baines, Mina, Coleman, Delph, Schneiderlin, Kean.
Related: Carlo Ancelotti urges Everton to lift Goodison crowd against Brighton
2.04pm GMT
Chelsea v Burnley team news
Chelsea (4-3-3) Kepa; James, Rudiger, Christensen, Azpilicueta; Barkley, Jorginho, Mount; Willian, Abraham, Hudson-Odoi.
Substitutes: Caballero, Zouma, Tomori, Emerson, Kovacic, Pedro, Batshuayi.
Related: Frank Lampard admits it would not be a gamble to sell Olivier Giroud
1.59pm GMT
Roy Castle department Leicester could set a Premier League record this afternoon. They’re at home to Southampton, who they demolished 9-0 in the return fixture. If they win by three goals they will break the record for the highest aggregate score in one season.
The current record is 12-1, jointly held by Blackburn’s 1995-96 side and Spurs’ class of 2009-10. Blackburn beat Nottingham Forest 7-0 at home and 5-1 away, while Spurs maimed Wigan 9-1 at home and 3-0 up north.
1.58pm GMT
Scott Murray is covering the early game at Selhurst Park. If you’re not a fan of VAR, look away now, and forever.
Related: Crystal Palace v Arsenal: Premier League – live!
1.10pm GMT
You’re here for the football, aren’t you? I’m not surprised. As Saturday 3pms go, today is pretty decent. Four of the Premier League’s top eight are in action, while Everton have the chance to jump into the top half of the table for the first time since early September. There are some cracking fixtures in the EFL as well, including Leeds v Sheffield Wednesday in the Championship and Swindon v Crewe in League Two.
These are our featured games, all of which kick off at 3pm.
Continue reading...January 6, 2020
South Africa v England: second Test, day four – live!
Sibley is what England’s top order has needed for yearsFeel free to email Tanya or tweet @TJAldred your thoughts
9.39am GMT
95th over: England 307-4 (Sibley 104, Stokes 70) Memories flooding back of Stokes’s double hundred he gathered four years ago as he clobbers Maharaj with a wide-legged reverse sweep, a smash through mid-wicket and a stick-that-up-your-jumper casual six. Brutal.
9.35am GMT
94th over: England 294-4 (Sibley 104, Stokes 55) Three off Rabada, and that’s drinks and the morning has gone better than England could have dreamt. South Africa, ye gods, have not had such a good morning. A special mention here to all those county cricket readers who have been championing Sibley for two or three years, and to him for churning out those hundreds for Warwickshire - it is his Championship performances that got him picked for England, no hunch, no admiration of his Vince-like flair.
9.31am GMT
91st over: England 289-4 (Sibley 103, Stokes 54) Yes! Sibley sweeps Maharaj for four - such panache! He pumps the air, pulls off his helmet to reveal the broadest of smiles, gets a big hug from Ben Stokes, kisses the badge, and on the balcony everyone is standing and smiling, Sam Curran leaps in the air. What a cracking innings, playing to his strengths, doing it for the team. From Surrey to Warwickshire to England - here’s to many , many more. The first century of the series too.
9.26am GMT
90th over: England 282-4 (Sibley 99, Stokes 50) And that’s the Ben Stokes 50 with a touch behind square and the Dom Sibley 99 as he edges Rabada, not completely convincingly, down to the boundary and on the England balcony everyone is smiling. Come on Dom!
A lovely email from David Murray. What a morning! An England win in prospect and suddenly 3 or 4 choices for the-future-of-England cricket (Sibley, Pope, Crawley, Burns).
9.21am GMT
89th over: England 277-4 (Sibley 95, Stokes 49) Stokes is seeing the new ball like a new year’s resolution he needs to finish off, he reverse-sweeps Maharaj with such quick, loose hands. It is Jack Spratt and his Mrs Spratt out there in the middle for England but, oh, such a perfect combination. Especially with all the Christmas leftovers to finish off.
9.18am GMT
88th over: England 272-4 (Sibley 94, Stokes 45) Oh dear, nothing going for South Africa this morning. Stokes pulls Rabada high and a sprinting de Koch calls for it, he must cover 50 yards sprinting down towards fine leg, but then muffs the (difficult) chance. Stokes rubs salt into the wound by rocking back onto his heels, rolling his wrists and slamming a juicy full toss back over the boundary next ball. And that’s the fifty partnership of which Stokes has scored 45! And now Sibley gets in on the act with a nicely played boundary through the covers.
Charles Shedrick writes:
9.10am GMT
87th over: England 261-4 (Sibley 90, Stokes 38 ) Sibley enters the 90s with a prosaic two off Maharaj into the leg side. It takes some mental strength to just plod away while a cartoon hero throws the bat at the other end.
Michael Anderson, you’re my hero
9.08am GMT
87th over: England 259-4 (Sibley 88, Stokes 38 ) Philander trundels in and for no apparent reason turns carthorse as Stokes climbs into his farmyard galoshes and throws the bat for fours through backward point and square leg and runs any old place his can slam them. The England lead passes 300.
9.02am GMT
86th over: England 247-4 (Sibley 87, Stokes 27) Maharaj is kept on with the new ball. Sibley almost in trouble from one round the wicket that spins past the outside of his prodding bat. He looks a little leaden footed, but survives. It’s dusty out there.
@tjaldred MTMA. When do you think England should think about declaring this morning? Before tea, or do they wait for Sibley to get his hundred?
8.59am GMT
85th over: England 246-4 (Sibley 87, Stokes 26) And we have the new ball at last, after that expensive experiment, in the rightful mitts of Vernon Philander bowling from the Wynberg end to restore some order. Sibley with that dot-to-dot stubble perfection prods the pitch to see out a maiden. Norje, incidentally, is back on the pitch.
Tom! Tom! I hope you’re still reading... a message to cheer up your Monday:
8.54am GMT
84th over: England 246-4 (Sibley 87, Stokes 26) Just a massive Stokes six, down on one knee, thanks very much, straight bat, straight legs, gorgeous. Maharaj get the better of him later in the over when a ball spins out of a huge puff of dust - more good news for England.
8.50am GMT
83rd over: England 236-4 (Sibley 87, Stokes 16) That could be the end of the no ball. Ben Stokes decides to get his eye in by destroying Pretorius’s morning confidence with a six farted straight back whence it came, followed by a reverse switch for four. He’s got the bit between his teeth this morning, don’t go anywhere.
8.47am GMT
83rd over: England 225-4 (Sibley 87, Stokes 5)
8.45am GMT
82nd over: England 223-4 (Sibley 85, Stokes 5) A disdainful swat from Ben Stokes dispatches Pretorius for the first boundary of the day. Still with the old ball here, apparently Anrich Nortje is not on the field, sick.
An email pops up from Tom Bowtell entitled “exciting Philander Stat.”
8.40am GMT
81st over: England 219-4 (Sibley 85, Stokes 1) Ok, so that wasn’t the last over with the old ball. du Plessis gives Maharaj a go from the other end. It was nearly a seven ball over actually as the umpire lost count of how many balls Maharaj had bowled. Not sure if they still transfer pebbles from hand to hand to count the over out. Just a single to Stokes with a sweep behind square
8.36am GMT
80th over: England 218-4 (Sibley 85, Stokes 0) Dwaine Pretorius bowls a last over with the old ball, Dom Sibley is watchful. A maiden. A few hazy clouds float above Table Mountain but the sky is blue and the temperature a blissful 22 degrees.
John Starbuck has been musing in Yorkshire:
8.30am GMT
The players are on their way out, Dom Sibley has a new batting partner in Ben Stokes.
8.26am GMT
A pre-start email! Hi Danny Outram.
Whilst it was refreshing to see Dom Sibley’s long drawn out openers innings, I hear time and time again that it is the duty of the openers to take the ‘bite’ out of the new ball and allow the lower order batsman to get their eye in with a scuffed cherry that has less zip to it. Therefore would it have not been better had Sibley given away his wicket 10 overs ago?
8.21am GMT
Interesting interview with Graham Thorpe, England’s batting coach . He talks about the simplicity of Dom Sibley’s technique. Says he said to him, there’s time to talk about the areas of where to develop your game but when you’re in the heat of the battle keep doing what you do. Important to work on his technique outside off stump but without getting into his head too much.
8.08am GMT
Vic Marks was on the radio this morning and saying that this is the first time England have ever played four players under 23 in the same match. I’m not doubting Vic’s stats, but can this really be true?
Anyway, it looks a beautiful day at Newlands. Shaun Pollock is in a suit and Mike Atherton and Ian Ward are in shirt sleeves. Ward’s hand is in his pocket, of course. The only other person I’ve noticed with such a pocket obsession is Aussie PM Scott Morrison. Apparently whereas in England you need overcast conditions to move the ball about, in South Africa the heat bakes the pitch a bit and the edges come up and it jags around. That’s the science bit. South Africa have this morning to try and keep in the game with the new ball.
7.55am GMT
And Sachin Tendulkar follows where Virat Kohli dared to tread:
“Spinners look forward to bowling with the scruffed ball, taking advantage on day five of the roughs created on the wickets.”
Related: Test matches 'should not be tinkered with', says Sachin Tendulkar
7.52am GMT
Nice gesture here by Shane Warne:
Please bid here https://t.co/kZMhGkmcxs pic.twitter.com/ZhpeWQxqY7
7.51am GMT
It’s all over at the SCG. Another century for David Warner, five wickets for Nathan Lyon and, as crackle follows snap, Australia claimed all five Tests of the summer inside four days for the first time.
Related: Nathan Lyon takes five wickets after Warner's ton sets up series sweep for Australia
9.04pm GMT
Good morning! It’s all a bit back-to-work-Monday here in the UK, but over in Cape Town England have been busy putting in the hard yards all weekend thanks very much. Dom Sibley, England’s answer to Desperate Dan, has, in between lunging awkwardly and munching cow pie, done what England’s team of cavaliers has been desperate for someone to do: score slow (his first 50 runs took 50 overs), boring, unremarkable and steady runs.
In the words of James Anderson “That’s what we’ve been missing for a couple of years. Hopefully he’s going to cement his place and will get confidence from this knock and go on tomorrow. More importantly, hopefully he can go on in his career in the next few years.”
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