South Africa v England: third Test, day one – as it happened

After a won toss and a very slow start England ended the first day of the third Test on 224-4 and with a slight advantage

3.47pm GMT

And with that, I’m done. Rob Smyth and Tom Davies will be here tomorrow. Bye!

3.43pm GMT

Here’s Vic Marks’ report on the first day’s action:

This was a slow burner of a day – except for those spectators foolish enough to stay out of the shade as a fierce sun blazed out of a cloudless sky. The pitch was slow, the band was surprisingly slow to play their trademark “Stand By Me” and for much of the time the batting was slow until Ollie Pope launched a mini-assault against the second new ball in front of an admiring Ben Stokes. Yet it would be foolish to conclude that in the 21st century it will stay as serene as this. Matches tend to accelerate on this ground. Despite a bland, innocuous-looking surface draws are now a rarity here.

When the players left the field England, after winning the toss, were 224 for four and oddly enough both sides could feel content with their efforts. The batsmen had battled away but only the best of them, which included Pope, could score with any freedom. None of them could post a half-century but the unbeaten partnership of 76 between Pope and Stokes in the final 90 minutes gave England the edge.

Related: Pope and Stokes lead England fightback after slow start and Rabada double

3.42pm GMT

Zak Crawley has a chat:

It’s been a very good day. I think we’re in a good position going into tomorrow. Hopefully we can bat for a while and then put them back in, because it’s only going to get worse from here, the pitch. It was as slow as I’ve batted for a while. It quickened up a little throughout the day. Hopefully it continues to quicken up and brings the nicks into it a bit more. [On his dismissal] I don’t think I can leave that, at that pace. Maybe to someone bowling a bit slower you can react and maybe put it away. At that pace it’s very instinctive. I could have kept it down, that would be the one thing, or gone up. He bowled me a similar ball earlier in the spell and I went up, which I thought about after. I think I was unlucky, but I shouldn’t have done what I did really.

I thought Rabada was going to take the first over, and when Philander bowled it I thought, it’ll be second over. And then I saw Paterson. I can kind of understand, on debut, they want to get him in the game. But if I were captain I’d probably have gone with Rabada. The game at Newlands was the best game ever. I couldn’t have asked for anything better than that. Hopefully if we get another win on this pitch, that would be a great effort and a very nice start.

3.27pm GMT

90th over: England 224-4 (Stokes 39, Pope 38) Maharaj, who has bowled more than a third of the day’s overs, finishes it with yet another maiden. It’s been a phenomenal effort from him across the day, but England probably end it with a slight advantage.

3.23pm GMT

89th over: England 224-4 (Stokes 39, Pope 38) Stokes leans back, swings his bat and pulls the ball high towards deep midwicket! Catch, come the cries, but it lands safe. A bit of a risky shot to play with eight balls remaining in the day, but all’s well that ends well, and that one ended in a four.

3.20pm GMT

88th over: England 218-4 (Stokes 33, Pope 38) Maharaj comes back, and Stokes snaffles another single. There will be two more overs today.

3.15pm GMT

87th over: England 217-4 (Stokes 32, Pope 38) A bit of late-in-the-day action for Rabada. Stokes is happy to see the over out, working the last to midwicket for a single.

3.12pm GMT

86th over: England 216-4 (Stokes 31, Pope 38) Pope clips Philander through midwicket for four. “I saw Pope’s Sweaty Helmet at the Melkweg in 1987,” writes Jim Baxter. “Some decent tunes but their stage show was unpleasant.” Oh yes, I remember them. They were part of the explosion of Somebody’s Something Something bands that eventually culminated in the blossoming of Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci and Ned’s Atomic Dustbin.

3.09pm GMT

85th over: England 212-4 (Stokes 31, Pope 34) Stokes pulls Nortje for four. This pair are batting excellently, while still giving the bowlers a bit of hope, making for fine entertainment. England will be pretty happy with their lot if both survive the last few overs of the day.

3.01pm GMT

84th over: England 205-4 (Stokes 26, Pope 33) A single for Stokes. Pope, now having issues with liquids going into his body as well as liquids coming out, calls for a bonus drink.

2.56pm GMT

83rd over: England 204-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 33) Pope has issues with a sweaty helmet, so to speak. Quiet at the back. He spends most of Nortje’s over trying to work out how to drain it, with liquid spraying out every time he moves. Maiden.

2.51pm GMT

82nd over: England 204-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 33) The lbw shout came from the first ball of Philander’s spell, and the bowler was significantly more excited about it than anyone else. Bowling round the wicket to the left-hander, the ball algled across was always likely to be going wide of off stump, and so it proved.

2.47pm GMT

Nowhere interesting, is the answer. South Africa have no more reviews, England have two.

2.46pm GMT

Stokes leaves, and the ball clips his thigh pad. Where was it going?

2.45pm GMT

81st over: England 204-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 33) The new ball is taken and thrown to Nortje, and Pope leaves the first couple, gets a bat to the third and then sends each of the last three to the rope! The first goes to third man, the second is nicely clipped through midwicket, and the last slammed past point!

2.38pm GMT

80th over: England 192-4 (Stokes 25, Pope 21) Two singles off Maharaj. The new ball is now officially due. Is this the end of Maharaj’s spell? I think they might have to prise this ball from his cold, dead hands.

2.37pm GMT

79th over: England 190-4 (Stokes 24, Pope 20) Pope gets the tiniest edge into his pads. Paterson buries his face in his hands, and then Pope works the next to square leg for a couple.

2.35pm GMT

78th over: England 188-4 (Stokes 24, Pope 18) Maharaj is just going to bowl forever. He’s bowled 29 overs today in one unbroken spell.

2.29pm GMT

77th over: England 186-4 (Stokes 23, Pope 13) After three dots Paterson bangs one in short and Pope helps it on its way, over slip and off for four. He does a funny kind of jump as he makes the shot, in which both feet leave the air and flick upwards, but his body doesn’t move. A kind of non-rising jump.

2.24pm GMT

76th over: England 182-4 (Stokes 23, Pope 13) Stokes thumps past extra cover for four. Actually there was a scoreboard link there throughout. Now there are two. Well, three, if you include the one in the previous update. Damn you, Steve Stern.

2.22pm GMT

75th over: England 177-4 (Stokes 19, Pope 12) A run each, off Paterson. Steve Stern points out that there has been no link to the scoreboard from the OBO. It’s now in the standfirst (at the top of the page), but it’s also here.

2.17pm GMT

74th over: England 175-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 11) Maharaj is still bowling. One off it. “I completely agree with you,” says Damian Burns on the DRS thing. “Where decisions are marginal go with the on-field decision. Everyone is happy. How the football people can’t get this in their heads is beyond me. Someone needs to tell them to switch over to the cricket now and again. We have a near flawless system, developed over many years of use.” But on the other hand:

Couldn't agree more - I've been harping on about this for years. Don't agree with Simon's rebuttal either - by that logic everything including the popping crease noball rule would also be umpire's call

2.10pm GMT

73rd over: England 174-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 11) Paterson bowls short, and Pope pulls it away for four! It’s been a relatively action-packed session, in which England have already scored as many runs as they did in the last one, and lost as many wickets. And that’s drinks.

2.05pm GMT

72nd over: England 168-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 5) Ooof! Maharaj hangs one outside off stump, Stokes tries to slog sweep it, and when he misses it completely the ball zips just past the stumps!

2.01pm GMT

71st over: England 167-4 (Stokes 17, Pope 4) Stokes drives Paterson to mid-on, where a diving fielder stops it reaching the rope. Next time he drives a bit straighter, and there’s no stopping this one.

1.56pm GMT

70th over: England 161-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Ye traditional Maharaj maiden.

1.56pm GMT

69th over: England 161-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Close! Paterson comes back and Stokes edges his first delivery straight to first slip only for the ball to bounce a foot short of the fielder!

1.50pm GMT

68th over: England 161-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Close! Stokes nudges one just wide of the fielder and short leg, who throws out a hand but can’t hold. “I don’t think the protocol is right for the circumstances of the Ben Stokes DRS,” says Gary Naylor. “Some of the ball struck in line with the stumps, so it hit ‘in line’. Umpire’s Call is irrelevant because they is no predictive element.” This reminds me of football’s offside/VAR issues, which are also a question of fact but there people are demanding a bit of flexibility. We can’t have it both ways, and I for one am entirely happy with the idea that DRS is there to correct clear umpiring errors and that didn’t constitute one.

1.46pm GMT

67th over: England 160-4 (Stokes 9, Pope 4) Rabada flings a full toss at Stokes, who hits it past mid-on for four with such nonchalance that he might have been packing a pipe in his parlour.

1.40pm GMT

66th over: England 153-4 (Stokes 5, Pope 4) Maharaj was absolutely convinced that Stokes was out there, and was not shy about telling him so. Not to be, alas. Pope pummels the last ball to deep point for four to take England past 150.

1.38pm GMT

But he didn’t. Not even close. That’s a review lost.

1.37pm GMT

65th over: England 148-4 (Stokes 3, Pope) A simple forward defensive would have dealt with that, but Root moved backwards and limply, vainly waved his bat at it. England patiently plodded to 100, and are chaotically tumbling to 150.

1.34pm GMT

The ball stays a bit low, Root gets nowhere near it, and it destroys off stump!

1.31pm GMT

64th over: England 147-3 (Root 27, Stokes 3) Shot! Root sweeps past square leg for four, an excellent shot, and then tickles the next to fine leg for another. Another sweep off the last, but it doesn’t have the legs to reach the rope.

1.27pm GMT

It was close, though. Umpire’s call on contact, which saves him.

1.27pm GMT

Maharaj is again the bowler. It might have hit him outside the line, but it’s worth checking I think.

1.26pm GMT

63rd over: England 136-3 (Root 17, Stokes 2) Rabada extracts what menace he can from an unhelpful pitch.

1.21pm GMT

62nd over: England 134-3 (Root 17, Stokes 1) Maharaj has bowled excellently today to control England’s scoring - he’s going at 1.23 an over - and thoroughly deserves his reward.

1.19pm GMT

That is as lbw as lbws get. Still, the umpire didn’t see it and it took until the last second of their thinking time for South Africa to go with it.

Denly 3 runs off 62 balls from Maharaj today. Not dissimilar to Cape Town. Maharaj well worth the wicket.

1.18pm GMT

The umpire says no, but if this hit the pad before the bat he’s in big trouble.

1.14pm GMT

61st over: England 133-2 (Denly 25, Root 16) Another wide and loose Rabada delivery to start the over, which Denly cuts for four! England have scored a scarcely imaginable 16 runs in three overs!

1.09pm GMT

60th over: England 124-2 (Denly 18, Root 15) A 20th over for Maharaj yields a single off balls one and six. “I take a vicarious pleasure in watching players move up the ranks in the all time records list on Cricinfo’s stats page - and today is a real treat: a Root century will see him rise from 40 to 34 on the all time runs scored charts,” writes Richard Morris. “Given the current England run rate this is more exciting than actually watching England bat just now.”

1.06pm GMT

59th over: England 122-2 (Denly 17, Root 14) Root knocks the ball gently into the off side and goes for a single, and Denly was a yard and a half short of his ground when the throw zips just past the stumps! Then Rabada’s final delivery is wide and loose and Denly thumps it away for his second boundary of the day!

1.01pm GMT

The players are on their way back out. A big session ahead, as always.

12.43pm GMT

58th over: England 117-2 (Denly 13, Root 13) One more maiden to complete the session. South Africa have eked out a couple of wickets and England have scored 56 runs from 31 overs. Honours approximately even; I’ll be back in a bit.

12.39pm GMT

57th over: England 117-2 (Denly 13, Root 13) A fine, aggressive maiden over from Philander. “People might complain that the SR of the top three is boring or not modern, but it’s perfect for this situation imo,” says Chris Parker. “With Paterson, Rabada, and Nortje, SA have three guys who are at their best when bowling fast in short spells, and they’re already approaching 10 overs each for the day. Wear those guys out and let the middle order take advantage.” It’s a question of weighing up the benefits of best utilising ideal batting conditions or wearing down the bowlers.

12.35pm GMT

56th over: England 117-2 (Denly 13, Root 13) Root comes forward to Maharaj and nearly finds himself yorked. A single off the last brings him level with Denly.

12.33pm GMT

55th over: England 116-2 (Denly 13, Root 12) Philander’s back, concluding Nortje’s fine spell. “Intrigued, I binged Lulu the 19th century trapeze artist,” writes Robert Blanchard. “No words, but a few 1870s promotional items of her act at the Holborn Hippodrome. She was a believable she.” There’s a picture of her here, if you’re interested.

12.27pm GMT

54th over: England 115-2 (Denly 13, Root 11) A late cut brings Root four more, these scored more deliberately and chancelessly. He has 11 runs from 19 balls, Denly 13 from 73, though the latter is occasionally attempting aggressive shots, particularly against Maharaj; he backs away from the last to give him room to slap it straight to a fielder at cover.

12.24pm GMT

53rd over: England 110-2 (Denly 13, Root 6) More streaky runs for Root, who bottom-edges into his waist and thence away for four, and then hooks the last, off the top part of the bat if not the edge, to square leg, where no fielder is present to complete the catch. Sky show an interesting graphic, illustrating how much straighter Nortje has bowled since lunch, the tactic that led eventually to Crawley’s dismissal.

12.18pm GMT

52nd over: England 105-2 (Denly 13, Root 1) Root gets off the mark in streaky style, top-edging a sweep that dropped just short of Nortje, running around from square leg!

12.16pm GMT

51st over: England 103-2 (Denly 12, Root 0) A Nortje maiden to Root. “I’m sure that it is not the case - and I really must stress that to her lawyers - but calling the distraction to your distraction a ‘trapeze artist’ does sound a bit like a euphemism,” writes Robin Hazlehurst. Not at all. She was a trapeze artist, and really quite famous for it. What she wasn’t, in transpired, was a she.

12.12pm GMT

50th over: England 103-2 (Denly 12, Root 0) Denly’s strike rate is going down, now at 17.64 after another Maharaj maiden (53% of his 15 overs have brought no runs). Of his 24 Test innings only one has been slower, and that only lasted 24 balls. We’re treated to a few more replays of that Van der Dussen catch, which really was exceptionally good.

12.07pm GMT

49th over: England 103-2 (Denly 12, Root 0) Crawley swings his bat at a shoulder-high delivery that was heading just down leg side, nudging the ball a little wider for four, and England’s score into triple figures. Three balls later, he’s gone.

12.06pm GMT

That’s a fantastic catch at leg gully! Crawley clips the ball off his legs, and Van der Dussen dives to his right and just about holds the catch, which bounces off one hand, off the other, and finally settles in both!

12.02pm GMT

48th over: England 99-1 (Crawley 40, Denly 12) Another Crawley single. Denly, to be fair, advances and attempts to hit the final ball past extra cover but it’s cut off by the fielder at short mid off.

11.59am GMT

47th over: England 98-1 (Crawley 39, Denly 12) England are in no kind of hurry. Crawley gets a single.

11.54am GMT

46th over: England 97-1 (Crawley 38, Denly 12) Maharaj zips through a maiden over.

11.52am GMT

45th over: England 97-1 (Crawley 38, Denly 12) Hello everybody! I have been a bit distracted this morning, which I have mainly spent researching England’s 1876-77 tour of Australia and New Zealand (for future Spin purposes). Then I was distracted from my distraction by looking into a remarkable-sounding trapeze artist called Lulu (who the team met in Adelaide). Anyway, time to focus. Nortje bowls, and Denly clips one in the air just wide of midwicket.

11.42am GMT

44th over: England 95-1 (Crawley 37, Denly 11) Denly is beaten, fencing at a big-spinning delivery from Maharaj. Another maiden, and that’s drinks. Simon Burnton will be with you for the rest of the day – you can email him here. Bye!

11.40am GMT

43rd over: England 95-1 (Crawley 37, Denly 11) Lovely batting from Crawley, who waits for a wide short ball from Paterson and slaps it over the cordon for four. This has been a superbly judged innings.

11.37am GMT

42nd over: England 89-1 (Crawley 32, Denly 10) Denly doesn’t have many get-out strokes against Maharaj - and that almost leads to a get-out stroke of a different kind when he misses a rash slog-sweep. Maharaj, who is bowling beautifully, has figures of 11-5-13-0.

“You’re lucky the ‘reviewer’ who hadn’t read your book (33rd over) gave it 4 stars,” says Simon Myers. “I was concerned to see a toy we were considering had a single review on Argos of 1 star. Turned out the purchaser was unhappy because the child they were buying it for already had one.”

11.33am GMT

41st over: England 89-1 (Crawley 32, Denly 10) There’s no need for England to hurry. Plenty of people think this pitch will crumble, subcontinental-style, so first-innings runs will be worth their weight in scoreboard pressure.

“Morning Rob,” says J Wood. “That footage in the Australian dressing room is phenomenal. Is there a film coming out, do you know? I was, however, entirely depressed to hear the booing when Smith returned to carry on batting. I was there that day, and in my section of the ground, he got a standing ovation, so I didn’t hear any of that. Honestly, some people need to take a long hard look at themselves.”

11.28am GMT

40th over: England 84-1 (Crawley 31, Denly 6) “Talking of David Steele, he was well-known to be careful with his money,” says Steve Hudson, “and had one of the better nicknames – ‘Crime’, because he never pays.”

11.26am GMT

39th over: England 84-1 (Crawley 31, Denly 6) Paterson nips one back a fraction to Denly, who gets a thick inside-edge onto the pad. I think that was seam movement rather than reverse swing. I’m obsessed with reverse swing today. This is what happens when you read too many broadsheets.

Paterson then tries the old one-two, a bouncer followed by a half-volley. Denly has seen it all before and drives sweetly between short extra and mid-off for four. He plays some gorgeous strokes.

11.22am GMT

38th over: England 80-1 (Crawley 31, Denly 2) A reprieve for Denly, who drives Maharaj a fraction short - if that - of Elgar at short extra cover. Elgar swooped forward in an attempt to take the catch, but it reached him on the half-volley and he couldn’t get his fingers under the ball. It was an extremely difficult chance.

11.18am GMT

37th over: England 78-1 (Crawley 30, Denly 1) The debutant Dane Paterson returns to the attack. He’s a reverse-swing expert, so keep your eyes on the shiny side. Nothing to report in that over, from which one run accrues. England are scoring at 2.1 per over, and it’s great.

“I had a novel come out a while ago and had an Amazon reviewer give it one star and say it was awful,” says Pete Salmon. “I checked him out only to find that his only other review was of an electric toothbrush recharger. Four stars! In terms of utility the chap had a point, but it did take three years of my life.”

11.15am GMT

36th over: England 77-1 (Crawley 29, Denly 1) A maiden from Maharaj to Denly, who is off to his usual slow start. No that was a compliment.

11.12am GMT

35th over: England 77-1 (Crawley 29, Denly 1) South Africa, control freaks that they are in the field, will be happy that England haven’t got away from them. England might lose two quick wickets now, but I would still prefer 90/3 in the 40th to 90/3 in the 25th. It’s a hot day, and if all goes well they will have the opportunity to punish South Africa in the final session.

“Morning Rob, morning everyone,” says Robert Ellson. “I always enjoyed that remark of Peter Roebuck’s, that as Somerset’s no.4, his main job was to stay in long enough to prevent Richards (no.3) and Botham (no.5) batting together, lest counterproductive member-measuring should occur. In a not-really-similar way, I think Joe Denly’s role in this England side is simply to bat well enough to stop any talk of Root moving up from no.4. If Denly only averages 30, but Root goes back up towards 50, he’ll have performed a valuable service to England.”

11.07am GMT

34th over: Kent 75-1 (Crawley 28, Denly 0) Nobody knows whether he’ll make it or not, but there is a lot to like about Crawley’s game. He plays with a breezy confidence, and his bat seems to have an appreciable middle. He’s also light on his feet against the spinners, as he shows by dancing down to to drive Maharaj for a single.

“Hi Rob,” says Neil Harris. “What was Brendon McCullum’s strike rate as an opener?”

11.05am GMT

33rd over: England 74-1 (Crawley 27, Denly 0) “I did look at those customer reviews of The Judge,” says Matt Dony. “My favourite was the one that said ‘I bought it as a present, so I haven’t read it.’ And then awarded the book 4 stars.”

Which, SINCE YOU ASKED, brought the blOODY AVERAGE DOWN.

11.00am GMT

32nd over: England 74-1 (Crawley 27, Denly 0) Crawley survives an LBW appeal from Maharaj - it was missing leg - and then puts him away to the midwicket boundary. Another good over from Maharaj, who looks like his old self today.

10.59am GMT

31st over: England 70-1 (Crawley 23, Denly 0) That was such a good over from Rabada, who created something out of nothing. Sibley had already survived two false strokes - one landed just short of midwicket, the other flew past gully at catchable height - and was sufficiently unsettled that he got out to the last delivery.

10.57am GMT

Brilliant bowling from Kagiso Rabada! He troubled Sibley throughout the over before dismissing him with the final delivery. Sibley flicked a shortish ball towards short backward square leg, where Elgar dived forward to take a nice catch.

10.52am GMT

30th over: England 64-0 (Crawley 23, Sibley 30) Crawley edges Maharaj wide of slip for a couple. I don’t think it would have carried anyway, but it was nicely bowled. South Africa will back him to at least hold an end - and maybe pick up a couple of wickets - while they wait for the ball to reverse.

“This may be the first time in nine years that England have batted through the first session,” says Felix Wood, “but in more recent memory they were no wickets down at lunch on the first day...”

10.49am GMT

29th over: England 62-0 (Crawley 21, Sibley 30) Rabada, the pick of the bowlers before lunch, returns to the attack. Crawley continues to play with discipline and restraint. In the second innings of the last Test he made a skittish 25 from 35 balls; today he has 21 from 86.

“Some other nerd has probably got here first but...” begins John Horsley.

10.44am GMT

28th over: England 61-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 30) The left-arm spinner Maharaj starts after the interval. There was a snifter of turn before lunch, more than you’d expect in the first session of a Test, and a couple of deliveries straighten promisingly to Sibley. A maiden.

“Roy Fredericks was no slouch,” says Andrew Harrison. “Would love to have seen his 71-ball ton against Lillee and Thomson at the WACA.”

10.38am GMT

“I reckon Warner’s true antecedent was Keith Stackpole, a burly Australian who gave the ball a hell of a thwack,” says Mike Jakeman. “Also gave plenty of chances to the fielders, too.”

And he had one of those clever nicknames: Stacky.

10.06am GMT

“Regarding fast-scoring openers…” says Steve Hudson. “Wot, no Sehwag? No Jayasuriya? As for early examples of this style, how about Bob Barber in Aus in 1965/66?”

Sehwag and Jayasuriya came after Slater, though obviously before Warner. Bob Barber is an excellent suggestion, although he didn’t do it for long enough to have a wider influence. I think Slater had the biggest global impact.

10.03am GMT

Lunchtime reading

Related: England’s 500 overseas Tests: from horse-drawn carts to DVD marathons | Simon Burnton

10.02am GMT

27th over: England 61-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 30) That’s lunch. I’m not certain, because I’m not, but I think this is the first time since the Oval Test against India in 2011 that England have batted through the first session of a Test without losing a wicket. Nine years, man!

Zak Crawley and Dom Sibley played with patience and commonsense on a very slow pitch, and their partnership has given England a great chance to take control of this match in the first innings. South Africa need reverse swing, and fast.

9.58am GMT

26th over: England 61-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 30) “Morning Rob - I thought we’d agreed never to mention Michael Slater again?” says David Horn. “(We didn’t actually, but it’s an unspoken pact I have with OBO’ers) He did more than break opening. He broke an entire cricket following nation in one over (one ball, really) in 1994, and he broke me. I was 21, had just started working in Big City, thought anything was possible, and then Michael Slater broke everything. To cap it all, Simon Burnton’s piece reminds me every time I’m feeling particularly masochistic.”

I was unemployed at the time so planned to stay up all night. I honestly almost went to bed after one ball, and I did go to bed after Martin McCague’s first spell disappeared all round Brisbane.

9.55am GMT

25th over: England 59-0 (Crawley 20, Sibley 28) Crawley, a naturally attacking batsman, has played with impressive restraint. In fact his strike rate today (26) is less than half his career strike rate in first-class cricket (58). He knows this is a rare opportunity to bat long - and maybe even do that - in a Test match.

“The English idea of ‘nicknames’ is not really a nickname at all,” says Andrew Webber, aka Lloyd. “Nicknames should have some thought, humour or association given to them as we Aussies do. Jason Gillespie was named Dizzy in association with the trumpeter. Steve Waugh was called Tugga for a while. Mark Waugh named Junior as the younger Waugh twin. Beefy Botham passes the test as a big man of ox like stature and heart...”

9.51am GMT

24th over: England 56-0 (Crawley 19, Sibley 26) Crawley survives an LBW appeal after missing an absent-minded paddle sweep. It brushed the glove and hit him outside the line anyway. Hamza, at slip, ran across towards leg slip in an attempt to intercept the sweep. Had he stayed in position at first slip, he would have had a good chance of catching Crawley.

Sibley is beaten by some sharp turn later in the over, which will encourage both Maharaj and Dom Bess.

9.46am GMT

23rd over: England 54-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 25) Nortje jags one back to hit Sibley in the stomach. A few deliveries have taken the openers by the surprise, but generally it’s been a lovely morning on which to bat. Sibley gets his fourth boundary later in the over, deliberately uppercutting Nortje over the slips.

“The BBC cricket social is wondering if England openers are too boring…” says Thomas Whiteley. “I blame David Warner. He broke opening the way Gilchrist broke wicketkeeping.”

9.42am GMT

22nd over: England 50-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 21) The left-arm spinner Keshav Maharaj comes into the attack. There’s some encouraging early turn to Crawley, who plays out another maiden. That’s the seventh of the morning.

Thanks, meanwhile, to Gary Naylor for this link, about which I am officially excited.

9.38am GMT

21st over: England 50-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 21) Nortje, who has changed ends to replace Rabada, starts with a maiden to Sibley. It’s been a dull morning, but that suits England just fine.

9.33am GMT

20th over: England 50-0 (Crawley 18, Sibley 21) Crawley thick-edges a back-foot drive for four, which brings up a serene fifty partnership. But then Philander reminds us all of his threat with a beauty that seams past Crawley’s outside edge. At least I think it was seam movement, though it may have been reverse swing.

9.28am GMT

19th over: England 46-0 (Crawley 14, Sibley 21) South Africa’ fielders are throwing the ball into the pitch, trying to rough it up so that it will reverse swing. It does usually reverse here. South Africa desperately need it to do so, because Crawley and Sibley are in complete control.

“Is it too soon,” says Kim Thonger, “to mention the highest ever England opening partnership of 359 by Len Hutton and Cyril Washbrook in South Africa in December 1948?”

9.23am GMT

18th over: England 43-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Philander replaces Nortje, which means a change of ends from his new-ball spell. His first ball beats Sibley outside off stump; the rest is harmless. England are progressing with disconcerting comfort.

“Morning, Rob,” says Smylers. “England’s top three must be causing havoc with their long-standing nickname policy of just adding -y to players’ surnames. Have you heard on the stump mic how they’re coping? Has anyone attempted ‘Sibbleyey’, ‘Crawleyey’, or ‘Denlyey’?”

9.17am GMT

17th over: England 43-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Rabada strays onto the pads of Crawley, with the ball zipping away for four leg-byes. Nothing much is happening for South Africa, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Faf du Plessis turned to spin before lunch.

9.14am GMT

16th over: England 39-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 20) Too straight from Nortje, and Sibley drives imperiously wide of mid-on for four. Shot! “It’s a really slow deck,” says Mike Atherton on Sky. “As an opener, when you’ve got past the new ball, you’re saying, ‘This is the day. This is my day.’”

“After reading your comments about the Basil D’Oliveira trophy (5th over) I had a close look at a picture of it,” says Kevin Holloway. “I was surprised by how little the bust, to my eye, looks like the great man. Even the hair is parted on the wrong side - I think? It occurred to me that the sculptor might have googled D’Oliveira and mistaken a photo of Dolly’s son, Damian, for a photo of Dolly …”

9.10am GMT

15th over: England 33-0 (Crawley 12, Sibley 14) This looks like an excellent opportunity for England to bore South Africa’s bowlers into submission. Sibley, in particular, has the perfect temperament to bat in conditions like this. If the ball doesn’t reverse swing, it could be a long day for South Africa.

9.03am GMT

“Hi Rob,” says Billy Mills. “A bit cheeky, I know, but any chance of a shout-out for Ireland’s win over the Windies in the T20 last night, and especially for Josh Little’s nerve-shredding last over? I know it’s not really cricket, but as an Irishman, we’ll take what we get!”

Not cheeky at all – that was a seriously impressive win against a very strong West Indies side.

9.01am GMT

14th over: England 30-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 13) Sibley repeats his stroke in the previous Nortje over, waving a cut through backward point for four. He has started superbly. Right here, right now, Sibley has a Test average of 41.16. Some people wanted him dropped, never to be seen again, after the New Zealand tour. That’s drinks.

“Have England ever had two openers with three-letter forenames?” says Daniel Harris. “Yes, Dom is Dominic, but Cricinfo have him down as Dom. I don’t think it’s a proclivity.”

8.58am GMT

13th over: England 26-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 9) That errant pull stroke aside, Crawley has looked fine against Rabada so far. Rabada’s line has been immaculate, but so has Crawley’s judgement of off stump.

8.53am GMT

12th over: England 26-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 9) Anrich Nortje replaces the debutant Dane Paterson, who bowled a reasonable first spell of 5-0-10-0. His second ball is steered crisply through backward point for four by Sibley. With no pace in the pitch and little movement, this looks like a beautiful day for batting. But we’ve said that before with England, is it not.

“Former Essex and Notts batsman Will Jefferson - now there was a tall opener,” says Ian Forth. “He played on an England A tour but never quite fulfilled his potential, partly perhaps because he was 6 foot 10 inches tall. I seem to remember Tom Graveney was pretty tall too - certainly by the diminished stature of Englishmen in a country on 1950s rations.”

8.47am GMT

11th over: England 22-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 5) Rabada has started excellently, with a challenging line just outside off stump. Sibley steals a single into the off side to move to five from 28 balls. As ever, he has crawled out of the blocks. No, that was a compliment.

“England have now gone 35 Tests without naming an unchanged side (including the batting line-up),” says Chris Parker. “Funnily enough the last time we did it was the 4th Test vs SA, but that was the home series back in August 2017.”

8.44am GMT

10th over: England 21-0 (Crawley 11, Sibley 4) The pitch looks pretty slow, as promised, and Crawley mistimes another pull stroke. This one, off Paterson, fell just short of mid-on.

8.39am GMT

9th over: England 19-0 (Crawley 9, Sibley 4) Rabada comes on to replace Philander, not Paterson. He won that compelling contest with Crawley in the second innings of the second Test, and almost picks him up again here. Crawley mistimed a front-foot pull that teased Nortje, running back from mid-on, before dropping just in front of him. Careful now.

“Hello Rob,” says Matt Doherty. “From memory the only other tall openers were Chris Broad and Tim Robinson.”

8.34am GMT

8th over: England 17-0 (Crawley 8, Sibley 4) The Paterson decision hasn’t really worked for South Africa. He hasn’t bowled badly; he just hasn’t found much movement off the pitch or in the air.

8.29am GMT

7th over: England 14-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 3) Quinton de Kock has moved up to the stumps for Philander to stop Crawley batting outside his crease. The result is a maiden. England’s young openers - Crawley 21, Sibley 24 - have started calmly, although South Africa’s decision to hold Kagiso Rabada back has helped.

8.25am GMT

6th over: England 14-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 3) “With Crawley and Sibley both looking like at least 6ft4, is this England’s tallest ever opening partnership?” says Oliver Haill. “And is there any significance in that?”

Climate change. Actually, it might be the tallest. Tony Greig never opened for England, and I can’t think of any particularly tall openers. Cook and KP at Headingley in 2012 maybe.

8.20am GMT

5th over: England 12-0 (Crawley 7, Sibley 1) A rare piece of filth from Philander, short and wide, is larruped to the cover boundary by Crawley. Whether in attack or defence, the ball makes a lovely sound off Crawley’s bat.

“Morning Rob,” says Richard Vale. “Am I alone in thinking that the Basil D’Oliveira Trophy being a bust of the man himself is just weird?”

8.17am GMT

4th over: England 8-0 (Crawley 3, Sibley 1) Not a great over from Paterson. He was too straight, which allowed a couple of singles into the leg side and then four leg byes when the ball flew to the boundary off Sibley’s pad.

8.13am GMT

3rd over: England 2-0 (Crawley 2, Sibley 0) It looks like a clammy day in Port Elizabeth, though it’s not always easy to discern conditions in South Africa when you’re in an office approximately 9.371.6 miles away. There’s a bit of grass on the pitch, as is usually the case in South Africa on the first morning, and Crawley is beaten by a glorious delivery from Philander that nips away off the seam. Only Steve Smith would have nicked that. The rest of the over is defended confidently.

Good stuff from the Sky Sports team, who use the popular split-screen medium to demonstrate that Crawley has made a technical change, with his bat coming down much straighter.

8.08am GMT

2nd over: England 2-0 (Crawley 2, Sibley 0) Well I’ll be damned. Dane Paterson, rather than Kagiso Rabada, will share the new ball. That’s an eccentric decision, though I’m sure South Africa have a plan. His fourth ball is a beauty, shaping away to beat Sibley’s defensive poke. We have seen Paterson before, by the way - he gave a death-bowling masterclass in a T20 at Cardiff three years ago.

8.04am GMT

1st over: England 1-0 (Crawley 1, Sibley 0) Philander’s second ball nips back sharply to hit Crawley on the thigh pad, and the third takes a thickish edge before falling short of third slip. Immaculate stuff from Philander, as always. Crawley then works a single into the leg side to put England 1-0 up.

“Looking at Joe Root’s England blazer alongside the natty South African equivalent, I was immediately struck by how plainly classical it looks,” says Tom van der Gucht, If you ask me, although judging by my own sartorial crimes against humanity you probably shouldn’t, the ECB need to invest some of the money being blown on The Hundred in some extra trimming on their jackets. Nothing too garish: perhaps just a couple of gold rings around the cuffs and something along the lapels. Who knows, maybe it would empower Root’s leadership if he resembled a young Captain Birdseye.”

8.00am GMT

Here we go. Vernon Philander has the new ball, Zak Crawley is in the interrogation room. This will be a challenging morning for England.

7.53am GMT

Now this is how to start a Test match

“Morning Rob,” says Tom Bowtell. “There is a tantalising chance of an era-defining statgasm this morning. If Philander concedes 24 runs without taking a wicket, his career figures will read 222 wickets @ 22.22. It rather tarnishes Big Vern’s career that he lacked the foresight and basic human decency to have scored 171 fewer Test runs which would have given him a current batting average of 22.22.”

7.50am GMT

“Where do you think Chris Woakes is at the moment?” says Kevin Wilson. “He’s the least talked up of any of England’s quicks. He’s been in and out of the side and bowled well in Hamilton and was reasonably decent in the Ashes. But even when he’s played, it feels like Root underbowls him. He’s the natural replacement for Anderson with the new ball. I’m fine with Wood coming in as I think some extra pace will be needed, but the decision you need to make is around the new ball. Would Woakes be more effective with the new ball than Sam Curran?”

His illness has made this tour a bit of a write-off. He’ll always be a good option, especially at home, and I thought he was poorly managed during the Ashes. But I’d say England are right to use Curran for now. Woakes is 31 in March and has a chronic knee injury; it wouldn’t shock me if Anderson outlasted him as a Test player.

7.40am GMT

Pre-match reading

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7.36am GMT

Both teams make one change, with each bringing in a skiddy fast bowler. South Africa give a debut to Dane Paterson, who replaces the allrounder Dwaine Pretorius. England bring in Mark Wood for the injured Jimmy Anderson.

South Africa Elgar, Malan, Hamza, du Plessis (c), van der Dussen, de Kock (wk), Philander, Maharaj, Rabada, Nortje, Paterson.

7.33am GMT

“It looks a good surface, dry underneath, and it could deteriorate,” says Joe Root.

Faf du Plessis, who has now lost six tosses in a row, says he would also have batted, though it was a 60/40 call.

6.09am GMT

Hello and welcome to live, over-by-over coverage of the third Test between South Africa and England at Port Elizabeth. Let’s start with something thrilling, a list of scores: 1-1, 1-0, 2-1, 2-1, 2-2, 1-2, 1-2, 1-1, 0-2, 1-2, 3-1. Those are the series results between these sides since South Africa were readmitted in 1991. No whitewashes, not even a rout, and only three dead rubbers in 11 series.

South Africa and England have been the most well-matched sides in world cricket in the last 30 years. Some might say that’s because they’re essentially the same team, but that’s one for the Guardian Sport SuperBrains to consider. What we can say with confidence is that contests between the two usually come with a guarantee of tense, hard-nosed, occasionally brilliant cricket.

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