Nancy Wilson's Blog, page 45

Why do we give gifts anyway?

Yesterday's sermon was on the theology of gift giving. It's easy to slip into the expected Christmas rush with all the stress of shopping like a maniac and we can forget what it is we are doing. So here's why we Christians can celebrate Christmas like no one else on the planet. We really do have a reason for all this.

First, the Magi brought Jesus gifts. And they brought Him expensive gifts. Matthew calls their gifts treasures. So gift-giving has always been associated with the story of the Incarnation.

Second, the overwhelming message of the New Testament is that God gives to us so that we can give to one another. The two commandments to love the Lord our God and love our neighbor are like two parts of a whole, like a violin and a bow or a lock and a key. We don't just love God in our hearts; we love Him by loving our neighbor. These two things are connected. These two commands are a unit. Freely we have received; freely give!

Of course there are ways we can sin in the gift-giving. One way is by being grumpy about it. Or we can sin by giving to our neighbor instead of giving to God, and we can sin by giving to God instead of giving to our neighbor. The Pharisees did this when they didn't give to their needy parents because they had given the money to God (Mark 7:11).

Christians can  buy into the heresy that material things are bad in themselves. This can be a trap for many Christians, because it can sound "spiritual" to say that you are not going to participate in the crowds and the materialism and the crazy gift-giving of Christmas. Some say it isn't about Jesus at all, but simply about commercialism.  So they don't celebrate Christmas at all. Their kids get no gifts. Instead they say they will give a gift to the poor in lieu of gifts for the kids. This sounds super-spiritual, but it can be just like the Pharisees who called the gift "corban." Remember the White Witch in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe? When she interrupted the animals having a little Christmas celebration, she called it gluttony and extravagance.

Our relationship to God is mirrored in our relationship with our neighbor, and our family is made up of our closest neighbors. The state of our marriage, our relationship to our kids, and our relationship to our friends and coworkers all reveal the condition of our relationship to God. If we are serious about loving God, we must be serious about loving our neighbors.

This means we act horizontally how God has acted toward us. He has given extravagantly to us, over and over again. He does not stint or ration out His grace and mercy and love toward us in tangible ways every day. We must not be like Namaan who wouldn't stoop to be washed in the Jordan. He wanted something more "worthy" to do to be healed. We must not scoff at gift-giving as something beneath our great spirituality.

Of course this does not mean tearing around throwing away our money senselessly. We should give with wisdom. We should love the crowds of Christmas and we should love the merchants. Jesus loved the crowds and He loved to feed them. He gave them gifts of fish and bread. He gave them living water. The merchants at the mall are a form of God's grace to us, so we should be thankful for them! Thank God for the mall and the crowded parking lot!

The best gift we can give to one another is gospel-saturated grace. When we give gifts to one another, we are giving to Jesus. He keeps track of drinks of water. So we should give our gifts with the same spirit of grace. When we give with the right spirit, Jesus says thank you. He graced us, and we imitate Him. He gave us the Holy Spirit so we would become givers and lovers like He is.

And finally, why do we wrap our gifts? So Jesus will be surprised. And we might say, "What are you talking about? Jesus isn't surprised!" But when was Jesus hungry and thirsty or naked or in prison? When we give to one another, we give to Him.

So, we ought to load up all our gifts and laugh as we wrap them, and offer them all to Jesus in His name as we write on the tags and fill the stockings.

Isn't God good that He lets us imitate Him in such delightful ways? And we glorify His gift to us in His birth with each gift we wrap.

God bless you as you shop. Don't grow weary of the gift-giving. Render it all unto the Lord! And have a very Merry Christmas!

Stocking Stuffer Idea!

I'm just throwing this out there . . . but here is a fun, cheap, easy, and generally awesome little boy gift. Since it's a download, you can print out as many as you want, as many times as you want. Stick some in your son's stocking, tie some on top of the new book for your nephew, give a set to the little boy you babysit . . . you get the idea. All you have to do is download, print on sticker paper like this, slice them apart, and you're done. Easy peasy! Here's all the info right here. (Pairs well with The Dragon's Tooth which I'm sure you're getting for lots of people on your list, right?!)

Shepherd Mothers

A family is a lot like a church. After all, a mother has a little congregation at home, as my mother-in-law kindly pointed out to me long ago. "You have three in your congregation, three in your little Bible school." It seemed like a pretty big congregation to me, but some of you mothers have two, three, and four times that number in yours.

Mothers of children, let me tell you something. You are like a pastor to your children. You must feed them like a good pastor does. You must know how each one is doing. Each and every one. You must make sure each child is receiving love and attention, that each feels loved as a special member of this family/congregation of yours.  You must see that each one is washed and clothed and fed. And you must be available at all hours to minister to these little or big ones. You may not ignore them or put them off. The way you love and teach them is showing them what God is like. You are teaching them about God, about His world and His Word, and you are teaching them who they are in the Big Story God is writing. This is momentous work.

A big family, like a big church, may need more pastors. But a big family doesn't work like that. You are it. So you must ask God to give you plenty of grace and strength and help to shepherd this flock He has given you. The bigger the congregation, the bigger your duties. Learn to shoulder them. Getting help from the bigger kids may be great, but you can't hand off your responsibilities to them; they are some of the sheep you are ministering to, not co-shepherds.

Of course, I am not excluding the father's responsibility here. We can call him the chief shepherd in this little analogy of mine. My point here is that you mothers are the shepherds who are out in the field each day, tending these sheep of yours.  You are the teachers and pastors in your little (or big) Bible school. You must give an account of how the sheep are doing. You must tend them. You must care for each one.

Don't take this lightly. Learn to be a good shepherd to your children. Read the Scriptures and take them to heart. Don't compare your little flock with the other flocks. Compare your flock with what God wants from you, not from what you think will impress others. Are you being faithful with what He has given you? That is what counts.

God will give you all you need to finish what you have started. He has promised! And God bless you and your little or big congregation as you go.

A Little More Christmas Reality

I do love Christmas so much. The whole thing. I love all the busy, all the shopping, all the ridiculous. I love that our tree looks like it got really dressed up and then fell down a solid flight of stairs. I love that I knew what I was going for this year, but instantly had to let it go when I opened the ornament boxes. Five children, all hands in. Tree decorated in possibly 4 minutes. Every last ornament on. No theme, no balance, no sense of enough is enough. I wouldn't be surprised if there were some Christmas throw pillows in there. The day after we got it decorated, Titus accidentally leapt off the arm of the chair next to it straight into the branches. He slid past several ornaments and four rounds of recklessly applied garlands, making a solid selection of the decor on the right side of the tree look rather adrift and certainly droopy.

I love sharpies (I don't listen, don't bother to warn me about them) for writing names. So fast. Not fiddly. Come in good colors.

I love that Blaire prefers the bows for brooches, and removes them with haste from all presents that she notices.

I am relieved that I am almost done with Blaire's stocking, all but the toe and the holly berries. I love that this picture captures the droopy tree, the enormous advent calendar, the stocking, and the wild party animal that is Blaire. The double-point needles that she stabbed into my yarn in a gesture of goodwill. Most of all, I love Christmas for kids. I love doing things that are outrageously tacky because the kids will love it. Like maybe stringing a full string of FLASHING Christmas lights across the kids' table at Sabbath dinner. We want them to feel like we are really classy, you know?

Christmas around the House.

Welcome to our home! I wanted to give you all a quick chance to see some of the neat things we've been doing to get ready for the holiday season. Yes, off in the distance that is indeed an overturned cereal bowl. No, it wasn't empty. And yes! Glad you asked, that is an uncapped Crayola marker in the foreground. We were able to simply throw this together this morning without any advance prep! Come now, don't feel bad. There is still some December left for you to catch up!

Bring on the Christmas Cheers!

Merry Christmas everyone! Just want to encourage you all there that there is literally no excuse for not gettting festive with your kids in the kitchen this holiday season.

You can always wait until you have the time and energy to make everything from scratch but for some of you (like me!), that time can be ever elusive and baking can seem like an overwhelming prospect. The above pic is one example of how I jump right in with the kids, shallow end first. I baked a batch and after school everyone will frost and sprinkle for a post-tree outing treat!

Something you forgot to be thankful for

Seriously.

Are you drinking this in?

I, for one, have no words.

I'll bet that, in this recent season of thankfulness, you forgot to mention your gratitude that this outfit  is not in style. I can't even wrap my mind around it to be honest. Cast your eye over it again. Did you forget to notice the dressy gloves paired tastefully with a sweatsuit? I'll be you did. No one expects gloves. And honestly, I'm still stalled out back at the SWEATSUIT!  With tastefully appliqued floral motifs upon the sweatshirt, no less.

Another thing you may have missed on first glance, taken aback as you so rightfully were by the sweatsuit, is that this poor girl is sporting a tam, perched precariously on the side of her perm. I think that's why she has to hold her head that way -  bobby pins are only so sturdy after all, and the whole thing may slide down onto her shoulder in a minute.

Take a quick gander at the foot gear.  Yes – your eyes have not mislead you – dress shoes with socks.

Now that she's decked out in this sumptuous ensemble, what does she do? She loiters coyly by a lacy tea table,  holding a lily. Possibly to indicate the variety of lifelike instances in which this outfit would be appropriate.

Where did I get this photo you ask? No – it's not my senior picture . . . thank heavens. My senior picture is dated, yes, and truth be told I was wearing some serious shoulder pads of power in a black tuxedo jacket with black satin pants. But why bring up the log in my own past when I can so much more easily poke fun at this unfortunate speck? At least I wasn't wearing dress shoes with socks.

But I don't blame this poor girl . . . this is actually the cover of a sewing pattern. Yes, she was paid to put this on, so we can give her the benefit of the doubt. But someone out there, at some point in the 1980s, thought this fashion decision was a good idea. Enough of a good idea to manufacture sewing patterns, and no doubt sell them!

Fess up now . . . did any of you ever wear this in 1987? Have you ever paired gloves with a sweatshirt, tam, socks, and a perm? Did you wear it to a tea party? Or were you one of those people that wore incredibly high waisted acid washed pleated jeans with zippers in the ankles? How about hammer pants? Any of you have that dark deed lurking in your past? What about jumpsuits? I'm totally guilty on the jumpsuit I'm afraid. I had a yellow and white striped one that Mom sewed me and I loved excessively. I also borrowed her chambray one and wore it with the collar up and a silver stretchy  belt. Yep. I did that. And I pegged the legs too. In further bad news, I'm fairly sure that I still have a soft spot in my heart for jumpsuits . . .

How do we love thee? Let me count some ways…

I have always found it remarkable that sometimes people think that being a homemaker is a somehow limiting occupation. Like there isn't enough to do. Before I go on to some specific ideas, I'd like to just say a little something about this. I am fairly certain that if you gave yourself five minutes, some scratch paper and a pencil you could come up with a list of at least thirty widely respected careers that could fall under the heading of homemaking. What I mean is that if you are a homemaker, it isn't like there isn't any scope. A homemaker needs to be a great many things on a shallow level, but if she wants to get deep in some area or another, that simply adds richness to the home. It adds life. It adds love. Think of a few ideas here with me. Interior design, Cooking, Baking , Pastry Chef, Landscape Architecture, Musician, Artist, Event Coordinating, Educator, Accountant, Tailor, Farmer. A woman at home can dabble in almost anything – not wasting her time, but learning her craft.

But if you are all on board with the thought of loving your calling at home, but simply have trouble with the tangible ideas, here are a few:

1) Love the unlovely. Do something nice for the place you don't like. This is one of the reasons that I knit dishcloths and buy nice soap for the kitchen sink. Not because I was so overwhelmed with love for the sink, but because a nice cheery dishcloth, cute tea towels, and yummy soap work together to make the kitchen sink a place that I have put some love, not just a bunch of stuck-on oatmeal. I always love the final step of rinsing out the cloth and hanging it to dry, making the sink look all cheery again.

2) Buy a book, and read it. Spend some time trying to absorb more information about what you do. Read a cookbook. Love of things can be contagious. Find a person who is so full of love for that thing, and listen to them talk about it. Find a passionate cook, and read what they have to say about it. I have read books on baking bread, books on laundering methods, books on interior design, and books on decorating cupcakes with strange combinations of candy products. Does this obligate me to a life of baking our bread, precision laundering, and perfect decor? Of course not. But it gives me more respect, more understanding, and more excitement about what I have to do.

3) Get some goals, and work on them. I once made bagels every day for a week until I got them right. It was the same recipe and it took me that long to master it. Did the same thing in our early marriage with baguettes. Turns out that things don't always work the first time, but if you actually wanted to be able to do it, keep trying. Figure it out. I bet your husband won't mind if you decide to master roast beef, or homemade pasta, or make the perfect cookie. There is a lot of joy and satisfaction in achieving goals. There is also a lot of opportunities to give up. Don't.

4) Get your head in your home. If your head is always some place else, it is no wonder that your affections are also. A good way to refocus is to spend a couple days without any online activity. Give yourself a few minutes in the evening to check your e-mail and such, but otherwise spend your day mentally at home. Just give it a whirl. Although I think there are a great many fine things about social networking and iPhones, and all manner of technological advances, sometimes it just bogs you down. If you were really trying to get something done, would you invite thirty people over to run around the house with you showing you their family vacation photos, favorite songs, games they are playing, things they found shopping, or jokes they heard? Can you imagine the horror? But we do this all the time, and then wonder why we are feeling mentally fuzzy and zonked. Your mind is a busy thing, use it to help you with your own work, not the petty concerns of others.

Four is Big Stuff

Happy Birthday to the makers of my stretch marks! We love these two so very much. They are such a delightfully playful couple of crack -ups. They are the worst offenders of yelling "Mom! Help! MOOOOOOOM!" but acting surprised when I come running. "oh. not you. The mom giraffe is who we were talking to."

As I rather speedily write this, I hear Chloe yelling "Baby Moses!!!" and Titus is just talking and singing about chicken on the bone. As for the birthday gifts? Chloe is looking for something girlie. Titus asked for a real sword. The kind that would make blood. However, he promised in advance to not wiggle it around anyone in the family. Just practice by himself in the basement. I don't think he will be too disappointed with the nerf gun.

Sabbath Advent Fixin's

Tonight is our kick-off for Advent, and out comes the Advent candle wreath with the four candles, one for each week until Christmas. It is also the night that I hand out the Christmas jammies to the grandkids. I know some of you save those for Christmas Eve, but my philosophy is to let them wear them for the month of Advent, so they can get nice and worn in and out for Christmas Eve. If I hit the sizes right, they'll be wearing them till Easter!

But what about dinner? Who wants to cook a big meal two days after Thanksgiving? Who wants to eat a big meal two days after Thanksgiving? But it is Lizzy's birthday as well as our first Sabbath in Advent. However, since she has always been a very flexible girl, she doesn't mind something easy, so we are having sub sandwiches to celebrate her birthday and the first Sabbath of Advent.  Think paper plates (festive red plastic ones) and the bright green Christmas oilcloth (with poinsettias all over it) to cover the table. Goodbye acorns and fall colors and hello red!

The idea with the Advent candle wreath is to light one candle tonight and let it burn through the whole celebration. Then next week I light that one first and then light the second one for week two, and so forth for four weeks. Then Christmas Day we light one in the middle.

Next week I'll hand out the ornaments to each of the grandkids, and the following week….hmmmm….I haven't gotten that far!

But a Merry Advent to you all! And Happy Birthday, Lizzy!