Pam Vredevelt's Blog, page 2
October 31, 2019
A Way Through Your Impossibilities – Video 3 of 7
This mind-bending story from the movie set of The Shack will leave you in awe!
Have you ever wondered: How does God orchestrate a way out of places I’m stuck?I continue the conversation with my good friend, Paul Young, author of The Shack, a run-away best-selling fiction book. It’s the story of a father whose mourning of his daughter’s death prompts a visit from God.What started out as a half-dozen copies for family Christmas presents from Paul, has sold over 20 million books worldwide, making it one of the best-selling books of all time. A motion picture adaptation was recently released featuring Octavia Spencer and Sam Worthington.Here in Part Three of our seven-part series, Paul shares a phenomenal life-changing story from behind the scenes on the movie set of The Shack. The story of a real-life mom and dad stuck in all-consuming grief, and the incredible way God orchestrates a breakthrough on their healing journey.Now, prepare yourself for a jaw-dropping, awe-inspiring experience. We may not be avant-garde story writers like Paul. But we can all push the boundaries of our ability to love. To comfort more people and to love them more fully. We’ve created FREE resources designed specifically for those who have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth, death of their infant or child : [image error] Share this with your friends by clicking the social media sharing links Facebook , Twitter , LinkedIn , Instagram or Pinterest . Also feel welcome to contact me here for more compassionate guidance, heart-warming words, and healing wisdom. PrevPreviousHow Does the Holy Spirit Comfort After a Painful Loss? Video 2 of 7 NextThe Holy Spirit Always Intends Kindness – Video 4 of 7Next
A Way Through Your Impossibilities
This mind-bending story from the movie set of The Shack will leave you in awe!
Have you ever wondered: How does God orchestrate a way out of places I’m stuck?
I continue the conversation with my good friend, Paul Young, author of The Shack, a run-away best-selling fiction book. It’s the story of a father whose mourning of his daughter’s death prompts a visit from God.
What started out as a half-dozen copies for family Christmas presents from Paul, has sold over 20 million books worldwide, making it one of the best-selling books of all time. A motion picture adaptation was recently released featuring Octavia Spencer and Sam Worthington.
Here in Part Three of our seven-part series, Paul shares a phenomenal life-changing story from behind the scenes on the movie set of The Shack. The story of a real-life mom and dad stuck in all-consuming grief, and the incredible way God orchestrates a breakthrough on their healing journey.
Now, prepare yourself for a jaw-dropping, awe-inspiring experience.
We may not be avant-garde story writers like Paul. But we can all push the boundaries of our ability to love. To comfort more people and to love them more fully. We’ve created FREE resources designed specifically for those who have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth, death of their infant or child:
Share this with your friends by clicking the social media sharing links Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram or Pinterest. Also feel welcome to contact me here for more compassionate guidance, heart-warming words, and healing wisdom.
The post A Way Through Your Impossibilities appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
How Does God Make a Way Through Your Impossibilities?
This mind-bending story from the movie set of The Shack will leave you in awe!
Have you ever wondered: How does God orchestrate the way out of places I’m stuck?
I continue the conversation with my good friend, Paul Young, author of The Shack, a run-away best-selling fiction book. It’s the story of a father whose mourning of his daughter’s death prompts a visit from God.
What started out as a half-dozen copies for family Christmas presents from Paul, has sold over 20 million books worldwide, making it one of the best-selling books of all time. A motion picture adaptation was recently released featuring Octavia Spencer and Sam Worthington.
Here in Part Three of our seven-part series, Paul shares a phenomenal life-changing story from behind the scenes on the movie set of The Shack. . . the story of a real-life mom and dad stuck in all-consuming grief, and the incredible way God orchestrates a breakthrough on their healing journey.
Prepare yourself for a jaw-dropping, awe-inspiring experience.
We may not be avant-garde story writers like Paul, but we can all push the boundaries of our ability to love—to comfort more people and to love them more fully. We’ve created FREE resources designed specifically for those who have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth, death of their infant or child:
Share this with your friends by clicking the social media sharing links Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram or Pinterest
The post How Does God Make a Way Through Your Impossibilities? appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
October 28, 2019
How Does the Holy Spirit Comfort After a Painful Loss? Video 2 of 7
Where do you turn when an unexpected turn of events shakes you to the core? Where do you find comfort when there seems to be no guiding light in this darkness?
You really only have two options.
Do you choose to trust or to control?
In video two of this seven-part series, Paul opens a discussion about how the Holy Spirit always works with us to comfort and move us towards wholeness.
One of the names of the Holy Spirit in the Hebrew Scriptures is Comforter – One who lovingly wraps around us in our losses and times of suffering.
The Holy Spirit also helps to expose whatever needs our attention. To open the eyes of our heart and show us what we need to see. Not to humiliate us. Love doesn’t shame. The Holy Spirit uncovers and exposes our broken places to us, in order to help us move in the direction of healing, comfort, and freedom.
It’s all part of the Redeeming Genius of God on your way from here to there.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. I’m giving away new FREE Grief Care Tips to those who have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth, death of their infant or child here
Will you comfort those who mourn with this message of hope?
You can share this with others by clicking the social media sharing links Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram or Pinterest.
Feel welcome to contact me here for more compassionate guidance and healing wisdom.
The post How Does the Holy Spirit Comfort After a Painful Loss? Video 2 of 7 appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
How Does the Holy Spirit Comfort and Heal After a Painful Loss? Video 2 of 7
Where do you turn when an unexpected turn of events shakes you to the core?
You really only have two options.
Do you choose to trust or to control?
In video two of this seven-part series, Paul opens a discussion about how the Holy Spirit always works with us to move us towards wholeness.
One of the names of the Holy Spirit in the Hebrew Scriptures is Comforter – One who lovingly wraps around us in our losses and times of suffering.
The Holy Spirit also helps to expose whatever needs our attention. To open the eyes of our heart and show us what we need to see. Not to humiliate us. Love doesn’t shame. The Holy Spirit uncovers and exposes our broken places to us, in order to help us move in the direction of healing and freedom.
It’s all part of the Redeeming Genius of God on your way from here to there.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. I’m giving away new FREE Grief Care Tips to those who have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth, death of their infant or child here
Will you comfort those who mourn with this message of hope?
You can share this with others by clicking the social media sharing links Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram or Pinterest
The post How Does the Holy Spirit Comfort and Heal After a Painful Loss? Video 2 of 7 appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
October 24, 2019
How Does the Holy Spirit Heal After a Painful Loss
Yes, there were a few who asked.
Honestly, I was unprepared for Nathan’s sudden death at sixteen-years young.
Someone posed that question sometime during the first year following his departure.
Grace enables me to forget who.
It was one of those times when I had to ask myself, what just hit me?
Did he really just say that? No….Yes!…Unbelievable!?!
Grief has a short fuse and mine was lit. It took a boatload of energy to hold back the flames when I replied . . .
The grief therapist did not lose her son, his mother and father did.
When Nathan left us, the crazed feelings that accompany grief and loss exponentially exceeded anything I had ever known.
I found myself in an exhausting tug-of-war with reality, asking elephant-sized questions, desperately seeking God, aching for insight, understanding, and meaning.
I tend to think that most things in life can fit fairly well in one of three spaces – My business, God’s business, and their business. But grief fog has a way of distorting our nice neat little categories and how we perceive life.
We don’t see things as they are, we see things as we are.
Certain questions kept re-surfacing: What part do I play, and what part does God play in healing my broken heart? How will God orchestrate the way through my grief process?
I continue to seek answers related to this question.
My good friend, Paul Young, knew our son, Nathan, on a personal basis. Now and then our kids hung out together when they were growing up.
Paul is the author of The Shack, a run-away best-selling fiction book. It’s the story about a father whose mourning the loss of his daughter prompts a visit from God.
Paul wrote the story during a painful time in his own life, while doing therapeutic grief work related to traumatic childhood wounds. The book was designed to be his Christmas present to his children that year.
What started out as a half-dozen print-outs for his kids, went on to sell over 20 million copies, making it one of the best-selling books of all time. A motion picture adaptation was recently released featuring Octavia Spencer and Sam Worthington.
What follows is Part One of a seven-part video series. Paul openly discusses his painful losses, various facets of grief, and phenomenal life-changing stories from behind the scenes, on the movie set of The Shack.
The discussion will inspire you, trigger moments of awe, and leave you wondering how God might show up as a Redeeming Genius during your own healing journey.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month.
I’ve created some new FREE resources designed specifically for those who have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth, or painful loss of their infant or child.
The new FREE Grief Care Tips are here.
Who do you know that might need a message of hope?
Let’s rally together and be intentional about comforting those who mourn.
You can share this with others by clicking the social media sharing links Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram or Pinterest.
Feel welcome to contact me here for more compassionate guidance, God-graced wisdom, and healing advice.
The post How Does the Holy Spirit Heal After a Painful Loss appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
How Does the Holy Spirit Comfort and Heal After a Painful Loss
What’s it like for the grief therapist to lose her teenage son?
Yes, there were a few who asked.
Honestly, I was unprepared for Nathan’s sudden death at sixteen-years young.
Someone posed that question sometime during the first year following his departure.
Grace enables me to forget who.
It was one of those times when I had to ask myself, what just hit me?
Did he really just say that? No….Yes!…Unbelievable!?!
Grief has a short fuse and mine was lit. It took a boatload of energy to hold back the flames when I replied . . .
The grief therapist did not lose her son, his mother and father did.
When Nathan left us, the crazed feelings that accompany grief exponentially exceeded anything I had ever known.
I found myself in an exhausting tug-of-war with reality, asking elephant-sized questions, desperately seeking God, aching for insight, understanding, and meaning.
I tend to think that most things in life can fit fairly well in one of three spaces – My business, God’s business, and their business. But grief fog has a way of distorting our nice neat little categories and how we perceive life.
We don’t see things as they are, we see things as we are.
Certain questions kept re-surfacing: What part do I play, and what part does God play in healing my broken heart? How will God orchestrate the way through my grief process?
I continue to seek answers related to this question.
My good friend, Paul Young, knew our son, Nathan, on a personal basis. Now and then our kids hung out together when they were growing up.
Paul is the author of The Shack, a run-away best-selling fiction book. It’s the story about a father whose mourning of his daughter’s death prompts a visit from God.
Paul wrote the story during a painful time in his own life, while doing therapeutic grief work related to traumatic childhood wounds. The book was designed to be his Christmas present to his children that year.
What started out as a half-dozen print-outs for his kids, went on to sell over 20 million copies, making it one of the best-selling books of all time. A motion picture adaptation was recently released featuring Octavia Spencer and Sam Worthington.
What follows is Part One of a seven-part video series. Paul openly discusses his painful losses, various facets of grief, and phenomenal life-changing stories from behind the scenes, on the movie set of The Shack.
The discussion will inspire you, trigger moments of awe, and leave you wondering how God might show up as a Redeeming Genius during your own healing journey.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. I’ve created some new FREE resources designed specifically for those who have suffered a miscarriage, stillbirth, death of their infant or child.
The new FREE Grief Care Tips are here.
Who do you know that might need a message of hope?
Let’s rally together and be intentional about comforting those who mourn.
You can share this with others by clicking the social media sharing links Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram or Pinterest
The post How Does the Holy Spirit Comfort and Heal After a Painful Loss appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
October 16, 2019
Miscarriage: What to Say to Them
The director led me from the green room and onto the talk show’s set, where the show’s host greeted my warmly. In moments we would be live across the nation, and I was already on high alert.
However, nothing could have prepared me for what came next.
The show host looked into the camera and introduced me: “Pam Vredevelt is with us today. Pam is a professional counselor and the author of Empty Arms: Hope and Support for Those Who Have Suffered Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Tubal Pregnancy.”
Next he turned to me and said, “Pam, you talk about miscarriage and stillbirth in your book, almost as if someone has died.”
I was stunned into brief silence.
Almost as if someone has died?
Did he really just say that?!
Gathering my wits, I replied carefully, “Yes, that’s right. Someone precious did die. Our baby.”
While I don’t believe that the intention behind that statement was malicious, the words still packed a hefty punch nonetheless. More than likely, the host just didn’t know much about the topic or hadn’t given careful thought to what he wanted to say.
Unfortunately, unintentionally hurtful words said to those who are grieving are more common than many of us realize. And I’m doing what I can to reverse that trend.
Continue Reading at Focus on the Family.com
For more compassionate guidance, contact me here– healing happens best in safe relationships.
Also, check out my social media posts for more uplifting posts, upcoming events, and encouraging images- I am active and involved onFacebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram, and Pinterest.
iStockPhoto.com/Motortion
The post Miscarriage: What to Say to Them appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
What to Say to Someone Who Has Experienced Miscarriage / Infant Loss
The director led me from the green room and onto the talk show’s set, where I was greeted warmly by the show’s host. In moments we would be live across the nation, and I was already on high alert.
Yet nothing could have prepared me for what came next.
The show host looked into the camera and introduced me: “Pam Vredevelt is with us today. Pam is a professional counselor and the author of Empty Arms: Hope and Support for Those Who Have Suffered Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Tubal Pregnancy.”
Then he turned to me and said, “Pam, you talk about miscarriage and stillbirth in your book, almost as if someone has died.”
I was stunned.
Almost as if someone has died?
Did he really just say that?!
Gathering my wits, I replied carefully, “Yes, that’s right. Someone precious did die. Our baby.”
I don’t believe that the intention behind that statement was malicious, but the words packed a hefty punch nonetheless. More than likely, the host just didn’t know much about the topic or hadn’t given careful thought to what he wanted to say.
Unfortunately, unintentionally hurtful words said to those who are grieving are more common than many of us realize. And I’m doing what I can to reverse that trend.
Continue Reading at Focus on the Family.com
iStockPhoto.com/Motortion
The post What to Say to Someone Who Has Experienced Miscarriage / Infant Loss appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
September 7, 2019
How Do You Honor Yours Who Passed Too Soon?
Today is my son Nathan’s 10th birthday in Heaven.
As I shared yesterday, Nathan’s birthday used to flood me with overwhelming grief. While everyone else was moving on with life, I felt stuck on hold. Why didn’t others remember or notice his birthday?
Holidays weren’t much better. Trying to find joy was an unending struggle with my boy gone.
I’m in a different place now.
Today, I can honestly say that I’m able to celebrate Nathan’s birthday. Not without yearnings, of course, but I’ve learned that I can keep his memory alive by finding ways to honor his precious spirit and zest for life.
Nathan’s birthday marks the close of summer and the start of a new school year. Soon we’ll be heading into the holiday season.
This is a hard time of year for grieving parents. You may already be bracing yourself for the agony of your traditional celebrations without your loved one’s presence.
My wish for you is that you’re able to find some pleasure and meaning in the holiday season.
Yes, you’ll feel sorrow, because you are a person who loves deeply. The deeper the bond, the deeper the pain — but I hope you will also enjoy sharing meaningful times with good friends and family, exchanging gifts, hanging simple decorations, and reconnecting with those you love.
I understand if this sounds utterly impossible right now. Simply surviving may seem like the best you can do.
Perhaps your plan is to pull back, go through the motions, and simply get through the end of the year. You might be wondering how you’ll ever be able to walk this painful path for the rest of your life.
If that’s the case, I want you to know that I understand. I really do, because I’ve been there.
But I also know that you can hope for more than survival.
There is a path through the grief that leads to an engaged, energetic, purposeful version of yourself.
I know because I’ve walked it myself. And in 30 years of counseling, I’ve guided hundreds of grieving parents down a similar path.
While there is no one-size-fits-all solution, there are time-tested, proven steps that you can take to work through your grief and promote the healing process. You just have to know what they are and with good support, take one small step at a time.
I do this work because of Nathan, and because of our baby who died half-way to term years ago.
So today, in celebration of Nathan’s birthday, I want to offer you some hope and guidance on your path of healing.
For today only, Healing Your Empty Arms, my online video program, is only $109 (45% off the regular price of $197.) Just use promo code: BIRTHDAY when you check out to get the discount.
The simple practices and techniques I teach in this program have helped thousands of grieving parents find relief from lonely suffering, release guilt and regret, and rebuild their lives.
(The video program was created specifically for parents who have lost babies — but the techniques are universal, and the program can benefit anyone who has lost a child or who loves and wants to better support someone who has lost a child.)
If you’re ready to add more support to your healing process…
If you’re ready to take just one step towards more peace and comfort…
Then I urge you to join me in Healing Your Empty Arms.. Use promo code: BIRTHDAY on the checkout to receive the discount.
The post How Do You Honor Yours Who Passed Too Soon? appeared first on pamvredevelt.com.
