Kelly Epperson's Blog, page 11

Love your sense of humor.

Many of the authors that I work with want to make sure that their books come across with a sense of humor, a lightness. Perhaps that is one reason that they are drawn to work with me, as my humor comes through in my writing.

My sense of humor helped establish me as a newspaper columnist and a speaker. Please note the pronoun there. My sense of humor. We all have one, well, most people do anyway, and we need to ring true with our own sense of funny.

Mine, yours, ours. What works for you may not work for me. I am not a funny storyteller or queen of punchlines. I don’t recite jokes or have people busting their guts in laughter as I recount my daily adventures. My humor is whimsical, subtle and just sort of there. People use terms like “warm and witty” or whimsical or silly with seriousness.

When you be you in your writing, and life in general, your humor style will emerge. Your personality is uniquely yours and in essence, so is your sense of humor. We can share similar affinities for what we like, but our funny bone is our own, just like a thumbprint.

My advice is always to relax and just write. Don’t try to be funny. Forced funny falls flat. Your readers are yours because they resonate with you and your message, and how you deliver it.

Maybe your book is on hostile takeovers. You can write that with a sense of humor, certainly, or it could be all business. Either could work, depending on who you are. You can write a book on stand-up comedy and it can be purposely not funny. Follow me?

I don’t sit down and say, “I have to be funny today.” I simply have to be me. Funny is my side dish, not the main course that I serve. If you’re a writer for sketch comedy, it would be a good exercise to say I AM FUNNY before you sit to write. (I AM statements are always a good exercise.)

If you are writing on marketing strategies for small businesses, you can insert humor and lightness if that is your personality. If not, don’t go down that path. Whatever your topic, that is the guiding rule.

How do you relate to people? If you are amusing, overly or covertly, that will come through in your writing. If you are analytical, that will come through in your writing. If you are compassionate, that will come through in your writing.

Of course I think humor is important. That does not mean your book has to be humorous. Your presentation of your topic is up to you. Some cancer books are funny as hell. Some car repair books contain clever humor. Any topic can be approached with levity.

However, it does not mean that every topic has to be. I can learn about social media from Joe who is a straight arrow who gives the info, the how-to, the why-to, and bam, I go and do. Love it. I can learn about social media from Jack who is flip and funny and gives me what I need to know. I can love him too.

That’s the point. We love information and books and authors because they connect with us. The only real way to connect is to be genuine.

If you are earnest and sincere and somewhat serious, then write that way. That’s what your readers want – you. If you are ballsy and outrageous, then write that way. That’s what your people expect from you.

Your personality will shine through your written words when you allow yourself to express yourself fully. Don’t fake anything. Don’t try to come off like a Harvard professor if you’re not, and don’t try to come off like a class clown if you’re not. I say it a million times – just be you.

If you approach your topic with a sense of humor, it will radiate through the pages. If this book needs to put a hold on the humor, then be true to that. For those that say to me that they want to make sure the book reflects their sense of humor, I assure them it will. If they write from the heart, the effect is felt.

That’s the only advice you ever need. Write from the heart. Be true to you. Just be you.

Kellyepperson.com

Love your sense of humor.

Love your sense of humor.

Many of the authors that I work with want to make sure that their books come across with a sense of humor, a lightness. Perhaps that is one reason that they are drawn to work with me, as my humor comes through in my writing. 

My sense of humor helped establish me as a newspaper columnist and a speaker. Please note the pronoun there. My sense of humor. We all have one, well, most people do anyway, and we need to ring true with our own sense of funny.

Mine, yours, ours. What works for you may not work for me. I am not a funny storyteller or queen of punchlines. I don’t recite jokes or have people busting their guts in laughter as I recount my daily adventures. My humor is whimsical, subtle and just sort of there. People use terms like “warm and witty” or whimsical or silly with seriousness.

When you be you in your writing, and life in general, your humor style will emerge. Your personality is uniquely yours and in essence, so is your sense of humor. We can share similar affinities for what we like, but our funny bone is our own, just like a thumbprint.

My advice is always to relax and just write. Don’t try to be funny. Forced funny falls flat. Your readers are yours because they resonate with you and your message, and how you deliver it.

Maybe your book is on hostile takeovers. You can write that with a sense of humor, certainly, or it could be all business. Either could work, depending on who you are. You can write a book on stand-up comedy and it can be purposely not funny. Follow me?

I don’t sit down and say, “I have to be funny today.” I simply have to be me. Funny is my side dish, not the main course that I serve. If you’re a writer for sketch comedy, it would be a good exercise to say I AM FUNNY before you sit to write. (I AM statements are always a good exercise.)

If you are writing on marketing strategies for small businesses, you can insert humor and lightness if that is your personality. If not, don’t go down that path. Whatever your topic, that is the guiding rule.

How do you relate to people? If you are amusing, overly or covertly, that will come through in your writing. If you are analytical, that will come through in your writing. If you are compassionate, that will come through in your writing.

Of course I think humor is important. That does not mean your book has to be humorous. Your presentation of your topic is up to you. Some cancer books are funny as hell. Some car repair books contain clever humor. Any topic can be approached with levity.

However, it does not mean that every topic has to be. I can learn about social media from Joe who is a straight arrow who gives the info, the how-to, the why-to, and bam, I go and do. Love it. I can learn about social media from Jack who is flip and funny and gives me what I need to know. I can love him too.

That’s the point. We love information and books and authors because they connect with us. The only real way to connect is to be genuine.

If you are earnest and sincere and somewhat serious, then write that way. That’s what your readers want – you. If you are ballsy and outrageous, then write that way. That’s what your people expect from you.

Your personality will shine through your written words when you allow yourself to express yourself fully. Don’t fake anything. Don’t try to come off like a Harvard professor if you’re not, and don’t try to come off like a class clown if you’re not. I say it a million times – just be you.

If you approach your topic with a sense of humor, it will radiate through the pages. If this book needs to put a hold on the humor, then be true to that. For those that say to me that they want to make sure the book reflects their sense of humor, I assure them it will. If they write from the heart, the effect is felt.

That’s the only advice you ever need. Write from the heart. Be true to you. Just be you.

kellyepperson.com

 

 

Spring break has new meaning for mom of college kids

It wasn’t that long ago that I was the one going on spring break. When I was a junior, one of my roommates and I roadtripped in her little green car. We drove all the way through, from Illinois to Florida, driving and sleeping in shifts. I remember curling up on the floorboard and putting my head on the seat to sleep. I also recall her stereo would rewind directly back to the beginning of a song on a cassette and we wore out Madonna’s “Crazy for You.”

Our spring break week wasn’t the same as most colleges and we did not go to Daytona, which was the crazy place of the era. We were off the beaten path, on the other side of the state staying at my aunt and uncle’s house.

We were not “girls gone wild,” but we were girls who got too much sun by day and drank too much beer by night. Our antics would be called “girls gone mild,” but we had a blast.

Now I get excited about spring break from a different perspective. My babies will be coming home. As a freshman and a sophomore at different schools, I know that their spring break weeks will not always coincide (this year they overlap four days) and that they will not always spend spring break at home.

Right now, they are content to come home, eat, sleep, and unwind. The actual time I get with them will be fleeting. They’ll spend most of the time with friends. They will watch movies and play video games and hang out.

Yet, there will be snippets when I get them in between their comings and goings, and can bask in their delightful silly witty ways. I know I’m biased, but my boys are two of the smartest, funniest guys on the planet.

I love their stories, their delivery, and their interactions with each other. They’ve had their moments of frustration with each other, as all siblings do, but for the most part they have always gotten along. They do now and I trust they will be good support for each other as they continue to enter into adulthood.

Their current version of boys gone wild will be indulging in too much of the home cooked meals and home baked desserts, too much sleep, and too much mindless gaming. They want to spend spring break doing nothing and not having to think.

I’m fine with that. Soon enough, they’ll be taking off to some spring break locale that doesn’t include muffins with mom. And soon enough, they’ll be out in the “real world” and spring break will no longer exist.

I remember my first job out of college. I was working at the IRS and feeling very antsy when March came along. I had spring fever and wished desperately that the government believed in spring break for all new hires.

Who knows what the future holds for my fellas. All I know is this spring break, they are coming home. One comes via plane, one comes via car. They both will come with laundry.

I will tell them stories of my spring break when we got so sunburnt, we put Noxzema all over our bodies to cool us down. My sons won’t know what Noxzema is. They will grab a cookie and head out the door.

Glad to simply have them home for a little while, I will replay the cassette in my mind. The lyrics don’t apply, but the title does. My precious sons, I’m crazy for you.

(Kelly Epperson Simmons is an author/speaker/book coach who helps people birth their books. Visit www.kellyepperson.com or call toll free 888-637-3563.)

 

 

Traveling tips and fashion advice from the airport

Traveling tips and fashion advice from the airport

Learn from me what not to do going through airport security.

Don’t leave your water bottle in your bag. Oops, I did it again.  They will ask if you want to chug it, leave the area to drink and come back through the line again (yeah, right), or if they should toss it. You have to wait while your bag goes through the scanner again sans water bottle.

Don’t wear big clunky jewelry or belts that are not easy to get on and off. Don’t wear boots or shoes that you have to tug and struggle with.  Don’t bury your laptop in your suitcase.

I’ve learned the drill and pride myself on being a pro on getting through efficiently and not being someone that folks in line dread getting stuck behind. I do easy-airport-day accessories and my boots zip off easy. My laptop is in an easy in-easy-out bag.

Grab two bins; one for shoes, jacket and stuff, one for laptop. Zip the bag and push it down the conveyor belt. Step inside the timewarp chamber. (That’s what it makes me think of; I’ve yet to be transported.) Place your feet on the big yellow feet. Arms over your head. Wait for the thing to go back and forth, taking a picture of your intestines.

Don’t wear metallics. New lesson learned: Blingy wardrobe slows down security. Jacket with pretties can be removed. Turtle neck with a shimmer material, um, no. Pat down. All is well.

Waiting in line this morning to go through security, the lovely gentleman took one look at me and said I was going to light them up. He didn’t mean it as a compliment.

Metallic threads woven throughout my skirt did indeed light up the TSA officers. They had me step into the air chamber/bug zapper/metal detector again and wait for my flouncy skirt to stop moving around me before they scanned one more time.

Again, my lower body set off their Not Good warnings and I had to be patted down and my hands had to be swabbed for chemicals. A new definition for fashion police, I guess.

My favorite, comfy traveling clothes will have to be un-bedazzled. Even my jeans with a rivet and a rhinestone on the back pocket have set off the ultra-sensitive sensors. Now I know why some people wear sweats when they travel.

After you get through security and get yourself put back together (Milwaukee airport calls this the Recombobulation Area, my favorite airport sign ever), go buy an overpriced bottle of water. It’s good to have in case the beverage service on the airplane is delayed or you fall asleep and miss when they come through. Drink plenty of water on the flight.

When you land, grab your bag and go. Walk past the first ladies restroom that you see and hit the next one. There won’t be a line.

If you have to claim checked luggage, go to your carousel and get a spot midway. Pushy people elbow their way to be able to grab their bags the minute they launch out of the hole of the wall. You can wait the 30 seconds to have it ride down to you.

Have a pretty bag, or adorn it with something flashy so you don’t have to look at the nametag of every basic black suitcase that passes by. If yours is heavy, let some kind fellow lug it off for you.

Go home, take a nap and start planning your next trip. And more importantly, your travel outfit.

(Kelly Epperson Simmons is an author/speaker/coach who helps people birth their books. Call toll free 888-637-3563 or write info@kellyepperson.com.)

 

 

There IS new under the sun!

“There’s nothing new under the sun.”

Whether you attribute those words to Shakespeare, Mark Twain, or the Bible, the sentiment rings true for many writers. When contemplating their content, many aspiring authors moan, “What do I have to say? Everybody knows this stuff already!”

Au contraire!

We need YOU! We need what you have to say, in your way, from your filter. Your expertise and experiences can help me, can help the world. How you approach your topic – even if that topic is something “everybody already knows” – is unique to the world and your vantage point is what others need.

Go wander a book store. Take a look at the cooking section or self-help section. Focus, for example, on healthy eating or weight loss. In general, don’t we all “know” that we can eat healthier and “know” all the ways to lose weight?

Not really. Books keep being written and books keep getting read because the message and the messenger matters. What you say is not how I say it. What you know is not what I know. Your gems of wisdom spark something in me. I can latch on to a nugget in your book and it propels to change my eating habits.

When the student is ready, the teacher appears.

I may have read a hundred books on your topic, but now, for whatever reason, I am ready to absorb the knowledge. Your book is at the right time for me, and presented in a way that makes sense and resonates with where I am in my life right now. Your book changes my life forever. I am grateful. Now aren’t you glad you wrote it?!

We can talk ourselves out of doing things all the time. The stuff we know and teach is second nature to us, so we assume it is to everyone else. Not so.

If you teach how to get more clients, you know how to do it. You’ve been living it. You think it’s easy. Maybe it is. Are there books out there on how to get more clients? Sure. You stop yourself. “Everybody already knows this stuff.” Wrong. YOU know this stuff. Others want to know it! They are waiting for your book to be the one that finally flips their switch.

My bookshelves overflow. I loved Stephen King’s On Writing. Does that mean I never again want to read a book about writing? Of course not. I loved Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird. Pieces of both of those books are forever part of me now.

Books matter. Your ideas and influence matter. If you have the desire to write a book, it is there for a reason. Don’t poo-poo it. Don’t belittle your wisdom. Don’t use the excuse that there is nothing new under the sun and you have nothing new to say.

Poppycock.

Listen to the radio. Heartbreak songs, make up songs, and falling in love songs. We never get enough.

If you want to write on love, grief, real estate, crocheting, spiritual authenticity, golf, or how to see the world on a budget, your words matter. What you bring out in you during the writing process will change your own life, and the book you create will enrich the lives of others. It’s an awesome journey. Don’t talk yourself out of it.

Maybe there’s nothing new under the sun. However, I discover something new every day. And many of those discoveries come through books. My eyes are now ready to see and my head/heart is now ready to comprehend. I am forever grateful those authors put themselves out there and shared their hearts. My world is forever better. I thank them. Someday others will be thanking you. Your journey awaits.

kellyepperson.com

 

Stuck? Get up and get moving!

When people get stuck, they need to get up and get moving. ‘Nuff said.

It’s really that simple, but I have a hunch you don’t believe me. I have many methods, silly and serious, to get you unstuck from lots of mucky things, including writer’s block. 

Today’s tips may seem silly, but they’re serious. When you are locked down with idea overwhelm or a mind that seems a blank slate, shake it up. Literally. Take a deep breath and shake your head from side to side. Take the tip of your nose and pretend it is turning the hour hand of a clock. Do a full rotation and then back again. Your neck muscles have just loosened up.

Stand up, spin around three times and sit back down in your chair. If that didn’t do it, stand up again and click your heels three times whispering, “Brilliant ideas are mine, brilliant ideas are mine, brilliant ideas are mine.” You can also cluck your arms like a chicken when you are saying this to yourself.

You think I’m kidding? Try it. Clicking and clucking unlocks the stuck places in your brain.

If you’re still feeling stuck in the muck, go to You Tube or your turntable. Have a go-to song. One that gets the blood flowing and takes you out of your head. “Music has Charms to sooth a savage Breast, To soften Rocks, or bend a knotted Oak,” says William Congreve. He goes on to say that things inanimate have moved, and living souls have been informed.

That’s exactly what you want, to get moving and get informed. Music has the power. Use it. Three minutes later you will feel refreshed and can tackle the page or keyboard with renewed enthusiasm. A few weeks ago I wrote how music is a mood lifter. It’s also the way to call in your creativity.

Let the muse visit you via music.

I cannot prescribe a song choice. That’s a personal matter. I have some that always help me: The guy with two Kermit puppets doing Queen’s “Under Pressure”; Susan Boyle’s audition for Britain’s Got Talent when she first shocked and wowed with “I Dreamed a Dream”; and “Good Morning” from Singing in the Rain. They each inspire me, and more importantly, soften the rocks in my head and unbend the knotted oak in my brain.

Sometimes I get up and shake my booty to “Bang Bang” (K’Naan and Adam Levine). It’s got a good beat and is easy dance to. I become the choreographer. “She aimed at my chest with love in her eyes…. It went bang bang bang straight through my heart. I could have walked away but I stood my ground and let her spray.”

You get bonus points for dancing in front of the mirror.

The pop culture quirky lyrics tickle me too: “Scorpion, she’s so hot she’s a scorch-ian; killing me softly, Lauryn or Kevorkian…”

How others play with words gets me back in my chair ready to do some word play of my own. That’s the key. This is not procrastination time. This is a conscious effort to unblock the blocks. There is brain science to back it up. I can give you research studies, yet I think you need to simply implement your own experiments.

I purposely didn’t include the links to my song choices. Going down the rabbit hole of You Tube is not good for writer’s block. I’ve been there. One click leads to another and the next you thing you know, an hour has gone by.

Have a list of songs. Pick one to play. When the blood is flowing, the creative juices do too.

Perhaps you are somewhere you cannot play music. Can you do jumping jacks? They work wonders too. Movement. Get up, walk down the hall, get a drink of water. Movement. Go to the bathroom and wash your hands. Feel all the sensations and smell the smells. This is a great stress reliever for any situation.

When you are feeling mired down, movement shakes things up. Also, do a quick body check. If you are hungry, get a snack. We have to feed our soul and that includes our stomach.

If you want to move me with your writing, first move you. Excuse me, it’s time for my dance break.

Love is all around us.

The movie “Love Actually” opens with a montage of arrivals at the airport. The voiceover states that if you are ever feeling shaky about the power of love, all you have to do is visit the airport and witness the love that is very real and very out in open in the reunions taking place there.

I’ve always enjoyed people watching at the airport and I remember the days prior to 9/11 when loved ones could accompany you all the way to your gate and be there to welcome you back. Now we have to wait until we get to the baggage claim to hug and kiss and cry.

International terminals are the best. The people are coming from a long way and the parties may not have seen each other in a long time. Ah, the joy! It’s palpable.

Airport scenes do affirm our emotional connection. I have gotten teary witnessing strangers. Some things are just part of the human experience.

We are all connected. I get that on some levels, and there are days when that makes no sense. I can sit at airport gate waiting to board and not feel any bond between me and my fellow travelers. However, if that plane were to start to go bump in the night, you can bet those strangers would create connection.

Tragedy brings us together. 9/11 is a great example. Never were we more willing to do anything for strangers, because in that instant, we were one. Our fellow man was a loved one.

The school shootings at an elementary school bind us together for that moment in time. Our collective heart weeps for every child and for every parent. Their pain is our pain.

I recently attended a visitation of a young man who died at age 23. His father is a co-worker of my husband. I didn’t know this family, yet my emotions were real and raw. To see the baby pictures, the cousins at Christmas time pictures, the toothless grins of growing up, and the cap and gown photos, the wellspring of loss and grief bubbles up to overwhelm.

The universal mommyheart cries for the pain the parents and grandparents feel to not have their beloved boy here anymore. We don’t have to know someone to feel their suffering. In those moments, we are all connected.

The human experience is full of many mysteries. How one day I can feel deep and utter compassion and kinship to strangers and the next day sit in a fast food joint and think that people are just plain weird is part of life. To see past the weirdness and the differences is the key.

Imagine I were sitting there eating my cheeseburger and fries making comments in my head about the oddfellows around me. The next minute a bus crashes into the building or a gunman enters or the building catches on fire. I know in my heart of hearts, that all we oddfellows would help each other any we can.

Humans give their lives to save strangers. Why? Because deep down, we understand that we are all connected.

We don’t live our daily lives always operating on that level. Maybe we don’t have to. I don’t have to hug and thank every person I see on the street, but I can smile and make eye contact and honor that they too are a person just like me, awash in the mystery.

That may be enough. When tragedies occur, we help each other. We bond. We are all connected, and love is all around us. No airport emotional scenes required.

(Kelly Epperson Simmons is an author/speaker/coach who helps people birth their books. Visit www.kellyepperson.com or call toll free 888-637-3563.)

Write What You Love…

Let us dare to read, think, speak, and write.

~John Adams

When people hear what I do, the #1 reply I get is “I’ve got a book in me!” Many people tell me they have been working on a book or have been thinking about a book for a long time. Some people say they already know they have three or five books they want to write. They know they have to start with one, yet nothing really ever gets out of the gate.

Some of the common excuses include not enough time or they don’t want to pay money to get support. The other thing that keeps people stuck is ideas. This time “not enough” is replaced with “too many.” “So many ideas in my head! I don’t know where to start.”

The idea of a book is overwhelming for many people. Putting all the pieces of the puzzle together seems daunting, so it’s easier to stay stuck. Yet, the desire is there. For many, the passion to become an author is palpable.

We humans want to express and we want to connect. Yet we hold back. I recently wrote on the vulnerability of putting ourselves out there in the written word; copy link to read the blog post Everyone Has A Story, http://kellyepperson.com/live-the-joy.... In our vulnerability is our greatest joy.

Many accomplished people could list many things after their name, and the one that means the most to them is the title of “author.” I go to many events and see the pride and enthusiasm when someone can stand up and proclaim their book is now a reality.

There will always be constraints on your time and money. I work with my clients in how to structure time to get pages written. You’d be amazed at what you can get done in ten focused minutes. As for money, we always find money for what we really want.

The real bugaboo is the feeling that a book is a ginormous undertaking and that it takes years and a lot of blood, sweat, and tears to pound out a book. Not so. You have the content already. You know your stuff. You know what your heart wants to say. You know what you want to share to help the human collective.

That is why we write. We know our words can help somebody else.

How many times have you read a nugget from a book and felt eternal gratitude? Books change our lives.

As Maya Angelou said, “The idea is to write it so that people hear it and it slides through the brain and goes straight to the heart.”

To touch another’s heart, you have to speak from your own. And that sometimes is scary. My clients realize that writing a book is an incredible growth process for them personally. To birth their ideas, share their stories, express their expertise to help someone else also helps them tremendously in their own journey.

The elation and the increased confidence are lasting residual effects of becoming an author. People say everything changes once they have that completed manuscript. It’s no longer bouncing around in your head or tugging at your heart. The energy of completion is a beautiful thing.

I get a lot of people wanting to pick my brain about their projects. They want guidance and a nudge to get going. Let me do that for you.

Because February is the month of hearts and love, and that is ultimately what I believe writing to be, I am opening up my calendar to you my beloved readers for a complimentary Brainstorm Session with me.

If you are ready to go from “I’ve got a book in me” to “I’ve got a book!”, this gift is for you.

Copy the link to pick a time to chat.

https://www.timetrade.com/book/LY8QG

This is the time for you to express your heart and let me get you out of idea overwhelm. You can indeed go from idea stage to words on the page to completed manuscript. You have to start somewhere. This call can be the beginning of your author journey.

This is a love gift from me to you, no strings. We’ll talk. You will feel so much better. I learn too. Every conversation I have makes me better at what I do.

If you are ready to dare to read, think, speak, and write, click the link up there and let’s chat. Your journey, and your book, begins now!

From Soup to Nuts is a Piece of Cake..

Our conversation is sprinkled with phrases that are not literal, yet we know what they mean. We don’t give a second thought to our language. Pretend you were a foreigner just learning English and you overheard this conversation.

Joe: I can rebuild your website from soup to nuts, with all the bells and whistles.

Jill: That’d be great. My computer crashed last week and it killed me! I pounded my head against the wall for day before I called you.

Joe: Yep, out of the blue things happen.

Let’s see. What does a website have to do with food? And are there really bells and whistles? Can a computer crash, as in hit something? Did someone actually die? Do people really bang their heads? If things come out of the blue, can we put stuff into the blue? Do things come from any other colors?

Our phrases and idioms are common to us, but it’s fun to listen with new ears. I actually did have a computer guy tell me he could fix up my website from soup to nuts so I looked up the origin of that phrase.

Dear old wikipedia proclaims: “’Soup to nuts” is an American English idiom conveying the meaning of “from beginning to end.” It is derived from the description of a full course dinner, in which courses progress from soup to a dessert of nuts. It is comparable to expressions in other languages, such as the Latin phrase ab ovo usque ad mala (“from the egg to the apples”), describing the typical Roman meal.”

My meals don’t usually go from soup to nuts, but I get the gist. Now perhaps I’ll start saying from eggs to apples and see if anyone notices.

The origin when the phrase “bells and whistles” came into popular use is not clear. Bells and whistles were used to draw attention so that has something to do with the meaning. Jingle bells on a sleigh, for example, were a signal of oncoming traffic, not just to sound pretty and to be fodder for Christmas carols.

Now all the extra features of an item are attention-getters, saying, “Hey look at me.” You can get a car with all the bells and whistles, meaning all the cool gadgets. Cars now have horns and don’t need bells and whistles to notify people that they’re coming.

The other explanation for the phrase is that back in the old days, sometimes people were presumed dead prematurely and buried alive. You could buy a coffin with bells and whistles in case your loved one woke up six feet underground and thus would be able to signal for help. Fact or fiction, I do not know.

Perhaps a computer crash is easy to understand. We have car crashes, computer crashes, and when we fall asleep on our friend’s couch, we say we crashed there for the night. Crash conveys an abrupt ending. Probably every culture also has terms of frustration that exaggerate into killing or banging heads, etc.

Out of the blue is short for out of the clear blue sky or fell out of the sky. When something happens unexpectedly, with no warning or advance notice, we say it came out of the blue. Like a storm that comes up quickly and suddenly. It just seems to come out of the sky, out of the blue.

We use many phrases without thinking about the origin or literal meaning. If something comes easy, it’s a piece of cake. For me, that’s also dessert. How about a new phrase? From soup to cake, anyone?

(Kelly Epperson Simmons is an author/speaker/coach who helps people become authors. Visit www.kellyepperson.com, call toll free 888-637-3563 or write info@kellyepperson.com.)

Gee, I have a lot to do…

My husband, known throughout the land as Prince Charming, is full of witticisms. I should have a tape recorder running all the time to catch the nuggets that come out of his mouth. He’s a very quotable guy.

Some tidbits are perhaps common sense, yet I need to hear them. “The key to getting it all done is doing it.” Well, duh. Yet, don’t we all need to hear that occasionally?

When the to-do list is a mile long and everything seems like a priority, do you find yourself whirring into a Tazmanian devil frenzy? I gotta do this. I gotta do that. And oh my gosh, that too. And I have to bring home the bacon AND fry it up a pan!

When the demands of work and life start to press in, take a breath. One time, and one time only, say out loud, “Gee, I have a lot to do.” Then make a list. Dumping it out of the head and on to paper helps tremendously. The to-do’s lose their power when they are corralled onto paper. If you don’t do this step, they keep running around in your head screaming at you every ten seconds. The to-do’s seem to grow and multiply. So diffuse that and write them down.

Then, do something. Pick one thing. Go!

Yes, you need to make a plan and outline and strategize and mindmap or whatever works for you, depending on the task. You also need to get started.

Some people stay stuck in the to-do list stage. They analyze, prioritize, and weigh all the pros and cons. They ponder and they wonder.  And they never actually do a darn thing.

Stuckness is common. You are not alone. When we do decide to tackle, sometimes we don’t know how to proceed. If your project is organizing your home, hire a professional organizer to help you. If your project is weight loss or toning up, hire a trainer to get you going. If your project is a book, hire a book coach to talk you through it.

We all need someone to guide us and pull us along when we feel like it’s easier to stay stuck going around in circles. We really don’t want to continue like that, but it’s been our pattern, and we are comfortable with the familiar.

To get us from the thinking about it to the doing it often requires outside assistance. Several years ago when I first heard the term “life coach,” I mocked it. Then I became one. I have also hired life coaches and business coaches and personal trainers, and will continue to do so. We all get stuck and it helps tremendously to have guidance to keep moving.

It’s a sign of strength to get support. We all learn that in our own way, in our own time. Another piece of wisdom from my Prince Charming that I have written on my white board over my desk is: I am always the student of myself and always the master of myself.

We always continue to learn and grow. Humans are not stagnant beings. We often learn more about ourselves when working with someone. That has been the case with me, and for my clients.

Business owners discover their journey is much more than “business” – it’s an amazing personal growth journey. Writing a book is a wonderful discovery process as well. I have seen spiritual transformation occur and that’s part of what excites me about what I do.

We all are here to express ourselves. We all do it in different ways. Our life is not just about a never ending to-do list. It’s about expressing ourselves and finding our unique way to do that. Aren’t we glad that we have artist, authors, and preschool teachers? Pet rescuers, master gardeners, and volunteers who hug and rock their premies at hospitals? We need the Oprahs, Picassos, and Richard Simmons of the world. We need you.

Whatever it is that you want to express, write it down. Then do it. If you are stuck, get support. In becoming the student of yourself, you will learn so much. You will indeed become the master of yourself.

Always learning. Always growing. Always expressing. And always appreciating every step along the way. Another gem from my sweetheart, and probably the most important one that we always need to remember, when we are whirring around or in a state of calm: “I am me, and that’s enough. Always.”