Monica Berg's Blog, page 27

Returning to Teshuvah

During this month of Virgo (Elul), the traditional practice of teshuvah asks us to reflect upon where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’re going. While teshuvah is sometimes referred to as a practice of repentance, the word actually translates to the idea of “returning.” The purpose of teshuvah is to help us recognize where we’ve made mistakes so that we can right ourselves for the year ahead.

Kabbalah clarifies the source of our missteps and errors is a result of a break in our connection with the Light of the Creator. But we can reclaim our best selves and repair those wrongs by restoring the Light at the places where the channel was broken. Rav Berg considered teshuvah a form of time travel–one that was practiced by kabbalists long before science (or science fiction) even entertained the notion!

Amending those lost or blocked connections invites more Light for us to share in the present and carry into the future.

Have we done or said something to hurt someone else?

We can bring in the Light through heartful, honest communication with the person we hurt.

Did we inflict pain upon ourselves through a bad habit, a misdirected decision, or a self-defeating attitude?

We can revisit the error and replace it with a new, better way of being with ourselves.

Maybe we owe ourselves an apology, and, from that place of self-forgiveness, we become better equipped for positive change–be it in our lifestyle, our mindset, or our practice of self-love.

Now, in the spirit of teshuvah, or returning, I’d like to invite you to ‘return to’ some of my past writings on the topic. Here are a few:

Rosh Hashanah: Honor Your Desire

A Clean Slate

Virgo: Exponential Change

Tell Me What’s Wrong With Me

Teshuvah is a pilgrimage back to the source of spiritual energy that is available to all of us. It is a practice that can benefit the entire world by multiplying the power of the Light, one person, and one channel at a time.

And in the presence of great Light, darkness doesn’t stand a chance.

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Virgo: Complete Transformation (and a Challenge for YOU!)

We’re great at checking things, aren’t we? Think of the things you’ve checked even today. Was your alarm set? Gas gauge full (enough)? Did you turn off the stove, lock your door, and double check your calendar/shopping list/travel plans to make sure they were all in order?

But when was the last time you checked YOU? And I don’t mean just the mirror check, as in this shirt needs a tuck or I’d better fix my lipstick. I mean a real-deal, 360-degree, inside-and-out inspection and assessment–much like a car mechanic would check the brakes, the tires, the engine, and so forth. A full-blown life tune-up!

Well, here’s the GREAT news: This month (which just so happens to be my birthday month!) I’m launching a 30 Days of Virgo Life Audit… and I want YOU to join me!

Why now? Virgo (Elul in Hebrew) is also known as the Month of Teshuvah, which means “to return, as if turning back to something you’ve strayed or looked away from.” This is a time to take full stock of where we’ve been and where we are so that we can redirect ourselves towards where we wish to be. We all have areas that need a little fine-tuning, and perhaps others due for a complete overhaul. Maybe lately, we’ve been reactive rather than proactive. Maybe we’ve behaved in ways that were detrimental to ourselves or others. Maybe we haven’t eaten well, or moved enough, or taken care of those in our sphere. It’s so easy to live on autopilot, but only when we challenge ourselves can we inspire positive change in our lives.

We Virgos are (ever so slightly) perfectionistic by nature. Okay, so maybe we’re a bit off the charts in this way… but it’s because to us, the quest for perfection and order feels like a spiritual pursuit! When my home is clean with everything in its place, I feel more relaxed and clearer to focus on larger tasks. Even so, my Kabbalah studies have brought me balance. I’ve learned to embrace the chaos, if just a little more each year. Because growth is almost guaranteed to be messy, but it’s a mess that comes with all sorts of blessings. See? Even a steadfast Virgo gal can buck her sun sign enough to call herself a “change junkie”! And if I can do it, so can you.

Author Junot Diaz had to take a long look at his life to become the renowned author and academic he is today. The alienation he felt due to his Afro/Latino heritage proved instrumental in his growth and success. He mused that “if these years have taught me anything, it is this: you can never run away… the only way out is in.” Likewise, Rav Berg wrote that we can “change the future by returning to the past.”

So instead of just saying, “I need to shift my direction in life,” the 30-day audit challenges you to take an unflinching look, Virgo-style (we’re great at the details!), at 10 aspects in your life–from health to career to self-care and more–for three days each. I’ll provide tools for your upgrades, one step and one day at a time. And at the end, you’ll see how the parts become a glorious whole. A completely updated and fine-tuned YOU!

To join in the adventure, sign up for my mailing list at rethinklife.today –and check it twice. You can also follow along at Monica Berg on Facebook, or @monicaberg74 on Insta.

Because while having a full gas tank and a well-planned calendar may be more than helpful, they aren’t foolproof guarantors of a seamless day. The only TRUE certainty is CHANGE, and the only person we can change is ourselves!

The goal is always this: to bring more light to ourselves so that we can share it with the world. When we are healthier, the world is healthier. When we are happier, stronger, more grateful and fulfilled, the entire world is lifted along with us. And that’s one of my greatest wishes for my birthday this year.

So Happy Virgo–I’m excited to spend the month together!

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The Wonders of Being Different (and Why It’s Worth Writing About!)

When our daughter Abigail was little, she struggled with reading. I’m not talking about the usual preschool alphabet-mix-up kind of struggle; I mean, she really struggled. We didn’t learn until much later that this struggle had to do with a learning difference. Finally, two years ago, she was diagnosed with dyslexia.

Yet even before she’d begun to close the gap with her peers, Abigail was way ahead in the communications realm. As they say, our obstacles often lead to strengths elsewhere. When a rolling stream meets a barrier, it redirects to another passageway with equal or greater force. Such was the case with Abigail. She couldn’t read, but (wow!) could she speak! In fact, she was able to articulate ideas more clearly and eloquently than most people I know. So we decided to “write” about her experiences in her first book, The Gift of Being Different (coming out on October 18!).

Abigail didn’t want to feel ashamed anymore, nor did she want other kids like her to feel ashamed. Instead, she wanted to convey the idea that often, our greatest gifts are hiding within our struggles. In other words, our differences can be our superpowers!

So many people in history have channeled their differences into great accomplishments. Artist Frida Kahlo, who suffered from polio as a child, also had spina bifida and other physical issues. In part because her movement was restricted, she turned to art as a therapeutic way to express herself. She became one of the most famous artists in modern times. Stephen Hawking, one of the most celebrated theoretical and astronomical physicists in history, continued to grow his mind and scientific knowledge even as ALS compromised his physical condition. And musician and famed opera singer Andrea Bocelli has achieved international fame despite the fact that he was born partially blind (and later became legally blind). He could feel the piano keys and understood the spatial elements of music better than he might have with full sight.

Consider the challenges that you (or your child, or someone else close to you) may face due to an aspect of yourself that runs contrary to the mainstream. All too often, we equate “different” with “lesser,” when in truth, the opposite is often the case! Whether it’s a learning difference, a physical difference, or another way that you do or see things differently, your uniqueness is part of your wonder. The world doesn’t need more cookie-cutter ways of being–the world needs originality! And there’s no one who can do what you can do in exactly the same way.

One of the most powerful messages in The Gift of Being Different is that you don’t need to know how to read or write to create a book. Abigail may not have been able to read with proficiency until the third grade, but she did have a voice and wasn’t afraid to use it. She believed in herself and her story. She is a shining example of what can be done if we embrace what makes us unique and dare to transform it into a superpower!

This week, try re-seeing one of your own challenges as a strength, or consider how that challenge might redirect you towards building other areas of yourself in new ways.

And when Abigail’s book is released on October 18, I will invite you to join in the celebration–while reminding you to keep discovering and sharing your own beautiful differences with the world!

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Reflections on Tu B’Av and Our Silver Anniversary

Today is the auspicious and joyful day of Tu B’Av, the holiday of love and union. And for Michael and me, it’s also our 25th anniversary!

The 15th of Av is about the joining of opposites or complements. In a month ruled by the sun, which embodies a cosmically masculine energy, it is also the day of the full moon, representing the feminine aspect. The earthly and spiritual worlds meet on this day in balance and harmony; it is a union of the Creator and creation.

Whether or not you find yourself in a romantic relationship, the opportunity this day brings is that of unity in all its forms. It may come through a newer and more profound understanding of yourself. It may mean connecting with a friend or a loved one more deeply. It may usher in a heightened sense of spiritual communion.

And Tu B’Av is the ideal time for the meeting and uniting of soul mates, which is why Michael and I chose to be married on this day a quarter century ago! Had we not found each other, we may have had perfectly nice lives. But just as one can see the same sun and moon from different parts of the world, we would have experienced it all so differently. Life would have been comparatively unfulfilled, incomplete, and unsatisfactory. Because I am certain that nothing could have come close to our connection. Our union has brought profound growth to each of us. And the impact of that synergy is reflected in our family, the Centre, and our expanding work for the greater community.

It’s hard to believe that I’ve been married to Michael longer than I’d lived alone before him! Yet even after these 25 years, or maybe because of them, my appreciation for him only increases. So much of who I am, of who I have become and continue to become, has been deeply influenced by our relationship–from the births of our four children (and the worries and setbacks that arose at times) to the countless joys and blessings the decades have brought. We’ve mourned the painful loss of loved ones. We’ve hurdled personal and professional rocks and boulders. Yet through every dark moment, the laughter and adventure have endured.

On this day in ancient times, single young women would head out to the vineyards to meet their potential partners. They’d dance in white dresses–always borrowed so that no one knew who was rich or poor. The playing field was equal. We, too, can “borrow” the light (with or without wearing white) on this day. We can connect with that purity of love, both within ourselves and with others. We can let the unifying balance and harmony of the day help us realign with our greatest intentions and desires. Tu B’Av offers an equal opportunity for each of us to connect in self-love above all.

My father-in-law and great teacher, Rav Berg, wrote that “True love is a consciousness, and not something you can measure with your five senses. It is when you feel unity with another person.” I understand this now more than ever. Michael is in me, as I am in him. We are one. Our marriage is, by the fact of our humanness, tethered in the “1% realm” of daily life: our work schedules, our children, household duties, and all the other sometimes tedious but always meaningful “stuff” of life.

Still, as Kabbalah teaches, most of what is out there lies in the unseen 99% realm. And that is where Michael and I truly live. We found one another through our spiritual work, and our quest to keep exploring and sharing in that realm is the tie that has bound us, perhaps (and hopefully!) for all eternity. My mother-in-law, Karen Berg, often said, “When we begin with love, love will always be waiting for us at the end.” I know this was true for her and the Rav, who continue to inspire and guide us as we journey forward.

Meanwhile, we are living the life we were meant to live with gratitude for each moment–as well as for the great gift of reaching this silver anniversary!

Wishing you light and love–in all its manifestations–on Tu B’Av and beyond. And to my husband, best friend, and forever-love Michael, here’s to 25 more, and then some.

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Don’t Just Follow Your Intuition; Lead With It!

How deceiving our senses can be–yet how revealing, too! We step out into summer’s greens and blues and rainbow hues, and we feel immersed in it all. Yet, in reality, we’re actually only seeing and sensing less than 1/100th of the electromagnetic spectrum, and all while standing on a speck of dust within one of trillions of galaxies in an infinite universe.

As Kabbalah teaches, we live in the 1% realm: the pinhole view of reality that our five senses allow us to perceive. As for the 99% realm, we know it’s out there (and in here, too). Meanwhile, our intuition lies somewhere between the two. And when it strikes, logic and reason may be challenged. Experience may seem inconsequential. Still, we are moved to act, with intuition at the wheel.

Take the story of Eileen McMahon, who’d been planning to visit Istanbul. Just before the trip, she felt a hunch–an inner push–to cancel her flight. Only later was the wisdom of this choice revealed. Just as she would have arrived, the massive earthquake of 1999 decimated the area, killing and injuring thousands.

Others have been guided in positive directions through unseen urgings. Einstein called intuition a “sacred gift” that helped inspire some of his best ideas. Oprah Winfrey claims to have “trusted the still, small voice of intuition [her] entire life.” And countless more have credited intuition for helping lead them to the right jobs, the right partners, or the best decisions in any number of situations.

So what is intuition? Rather than being the opposite of logic or reason, recent studies suggest that intuitive thinking is an adjunct skill that can be developed and sharpened. According to clinical psychiatrist Dr. Judith Orloff, intuition operates through the entire right side of the brain–the side that perceives patterns and gestalt “big picture” perceptions–as well as through the hippocampus and the gut. As for those “gut” feelings we talk about? Our digestive tracts are in constant communication with the brain via the estimated 100 million neurons lining them. Clearly, intuition is a whole-body experience!

Dr. Orloff also explained the idea of “women’s intuition” from a physiological perspective. Because the corpus callosum (the white matter connecting right and left brain hemispheres) is thicker in women, they can more easily integrate the analytical mind with emotional and “gut” feelings.

I’ve learned this firsthand, many times, both as a mother and a daughter. When my father was diagnosed with a benign brain tumor years ago, I flew in to be present during his eight-hour surgery. Although I’d planned to return home on Friday, my intuition told me to stay–which would mean spending Shabbat in the hospital. (I hadn’t spent a single Shabbat away from Michael and the kids in eight years!) Difficult as it was to follow, my hunch was right. Not long after this, my father’s dementia set in, followed by his slow downhill battle. Even now, I feel a sense of peace knowing that I stayed. And that we truly connected.

As with almost every other skill, the more we practice our intuition, the better we become at recognizing and using it. In fact, the U.S. Office of Naval Research is currently working on methods (such as virtual simulations) to help build soldiers’ intuition in high-pressure scenarios.

Here are a few ways the rest of us can better recognize and grow our sixth sense:

1) As the maxim says, “Know thyself.” The Rav often shared a teaching he’d learned from his own mentor: the idea that our soul is meant to direct us in ways we can’t imagine. Therefore, it’s important that each of us does the inner work necessary to clear our own pathway. A broken thermometer can’t give us the correct temperature, nor can our intuition guide us effectively unless we are in touch with our desires and aligned with our highest purpose.

2) Ask for guidance; then pay attention to the messages you receive. Sometimes the guidance will come to us through symbols, dreams, or other people, even ones we don’t think can guide us. Often the answers accompany physical symptoms–which leads me to the next tip…

3) Listen to your body. Feeling a happy flutter in your chest? A queasiness in your stomach? That “needles on your neck” sensation that signals danger? Or are you feeling relaxed and engaged? Heed those messages. The mind/body/spirit connection is always speaking to and through us!

Honing your intuition needn’t keep you from using logic. Or reason. Or experience. These are trusty informers, but there’s so much more! Kabbalah reminds us that everything already exists in the spiritual world in great abundance. The answers to all our questions, the wisdom of all the ages–all of these and more are always present in the hidden wholeness of creation.

So above all, stay tuned to the frequency of YOU. This is the “station” through which we resonate most purely with the universe, where the full spectrum of life’s possibilities await our notice and influence… just as we do theirs.

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Leo: It’s a Matter of Pride

No wonder C.S. Lewis chose a lion to be the “king above all kings” in his famous series, The Chronicles of Narnia. Aslan, the only character who appears in every book, possesses the ultimate in kingly–or some say, even divine–attributes. He is both gentle and fierce, both commanding and patient. He is wise, loyal, loving, and sometimes terrifying. We, too, can channel the unique attributes of the lion this month. Leo (Av in Hebrew) brings that powerful feline energy down to all of us, whether we’re Leos or not.

The lion is confident beyond apology. A lioness moves with grace and agility. At one moment, she is frolicking in the shade with her playful cubs. In the next, she’s bounding into the tall grasses to catch her prize. Lions live in the fullness of themselves at all times. Whether in caretaker, hunter, protector, or companion mode, he or she is all in. That’s the secret of lion confidence.

This is a great time to boost our own confidence as well. Instead of questioning ourselves or shrinking from social or other opportunities, we can spring from the grasses of our insecurities and greet the world fully! Feeling silly? Let it show (unless you’re in the middle of a business meeting–but then again, we can all use a well-timed laugh!). Have an opinion that you’ve been tentative about sharing? There’s more to lose in holding back than there is in going for it. Because as the old saying says, nothing ventured, nothing gained!

The bottom line? Be yourself, for better or worse. And bring the wholeness of  YOU to every moment. You may be surprised at how things begin to shift your way.

Besides, you’ve got the light on your side this month. Leo is the only astrological sign ruled by the sun. In kabbalah, the sun links us to the Infinite Light–that spiritual, creative energy that contains everything positive. The challenge of Leo lies in harnessing and directing this influx of light in positive ways. Leo’s tendency towards selfishness (the wish to receive for the self alone) can lead us down a path of “So much light! Shine it on me!” thinking. Relying too much on confidence or self-image without a strong balance of humility can turn a sweet thing sour. Enter the dangers of Leo pride.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines the positive aspect of pride as “A feeling that you respect yourself and deserve to be respected by others.” I’m all for respect and self-love. And there’s nothing wrong with feeling good about an accomplishment–because you’ve earned that feeling! However, the negative, ego-based sort of pride is defined as “the feeling that you are more important or better than other people.” And that’s the sort of pride that turns on itself. It shrinks us and holds us back. Founded in fear rather than love, it masquerades as judgment, blame, manipulation, and haughtiness. According to psychotherapist Dr. John Amodeo, “Pride prevents us from acknowledging our human vulnerabilities,” which cuts us off from authentic connection. In other words, we stop growing.

So instead of allowing our personal pride to stunt us, we can work on opening our hearts more. We can hold onto our confidence while still remembering our humanness. Because in that sense, life is an equal playing field. No one is better or worse than anyone else. Some may take wrong turns in their path, leading to destructive outcomes. Others may experience great achievements that win them the adoration of millions. But at their essence, everyone is equally worthy of respect, affection, and happiness. One of my all-time favorite Leos, the great kabbalist Rav Berg, believed that the most important rule of all is to “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” And in that act, there’s no room for pride!

The great Aslan’s mighty roar was described as having made “all the trees in front of him bend….as grass bends in a meadow before the wind.” This is the immensity of the cosmic power available to us during this light-filled month. As kabbalah teaches, ego (or pride)-based living always begins and ends with ourselves. Instead, we can share the light and might of Leo to influence, inspire, and lift the world in lasting ways.

By gaining dominion over our pride and tempering it with humbleness and empathy for others, we can become better friends, spouses, parents, and leaders. We can rest in the shade AND step into the light, as kings and queens are known to do.

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Resilience in Every Season

As a New Yorker, I know the dangers of a heavy snowstorm. Sometimes we get feet of snow with drifts that bury cars and sidewalks and collapse rooftops. (I realize this is a stretch to imagine in sweltering July, but trust me, it won’t be long). Yet when a healthy tree limb encounters the storm, it has a good chance of weathering the burden because it is able to bend. It has bowed and swayed with every breeze, every rainstorm, and every scampering squirrel. And with each movement, the branch has become stronger. That’s nature’s way: to accept what comes and keep on growing!

We, too, are resilient by nature–as children show us every day. (Remember the days of, “Anyone got a band-aid for this giant cut? Great. Play on!”) And now, science has proven that resilience–or the ability to overcome and even grow through adversity–is the rule, not the exception, for people of all ages. In a 2004 study by Linley and Joseph, up to 70% of people who had encountered a trauma reported positive psychological growth as a result of the challenging time.

Better still, research suggests that resilience can be practiced and strengthened! Dr. Lucy Hone, thought leader in the field of resilience psychology, understood this idea long before she had to learn it firsthand. She’d been working with hurricane survivors for years when, while on a family trip, her preteen daughter was tragically killed in a car accident. At that juncture, all the textbook advice seemed useless to her. She questioned everything, including her ability to go on living. Yet Dr. Hone did go on–and has since become a renowned author and speaker who has helped thousands of others through life-altering setbacks.

She identified the three most essential steps to greater resiliency:

1) Acknowledge that pain and setbacks are a part of life. To believe otherwise–despite what all those smiles on social media try to convince us–is to deny the truth of our existence. Yet, just as the shadow gives shape to form in nature, so do our challenges bring nuance and meaning to the big picture of our lives.

2) Look for–and accept–the good. It may be the kindness of friends during grief or illness, the new possibilities that open after a job loss, or other blessings for which you can still be grateful.

3) Seek positive thoughts and actions. This is the most important action we can practice every hour of every day. Continually ask yourself: Is what I am doing or thinking NOW good for me? Is it moving me forward… growing me… helping me heal? This is how we maintain a measure of control even when things feel out of control.

Kabbalah teaches that our darkest moments hold an opportunity for great light. That’s not to say that resilience will be snap-your-fingers easy. It takes time. It takes effort. And often, the gifts hiding within or around our challenges do not reveal themselves until much later. Michael and I never could have imagined the blessings to come after our second son, Josh, was diagnosed with Down Syndrome at birth. At the time, I was riddled with sadness and fear for the future (most of all, for his). Yet with each positive step we took in the days, weeks, months, and years that followed, more and more light shone through! Josh has brought more blessings than any of us who know him can count.

You don’t have to wait for a tragedy to practice your ability not only to survive, but to thrive, through life’s trying moments. Whether you experience an annoyance at work, a frustrating traffic jam, a minor health issue, or a more substantial setback, remember that you are not alone. Look for the good around you. Focus your thoughts and actions on healing and growth. Because cursing the driver in front of you won’t part the traffic Moses-style. However, playing that audiobook or listening to my podcast, Spiritually Hungry, might relax you and teach you a thing or two while you wait it out!

Finally, be kind to yourself. Take the time you need. Know that eventually, even the scorched forest will spring back with new life. New trees will grow, and they, too, will learn how to bend and not break–how to face life in all its fullness, come what may.

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For the Love of Travel and Heroes

Legendary mythologist Joseph Campbell wrote, “We must let go of the life we’ve planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” Similarly, Kabbalah teaches that in every moment, we are, in a sense, reborn. With every breath, we meet the world as a different person–one who can decide to change simply by changing what we think or how we act. And when we step outside of our familiar surroundings, we double our opportunity for transformation. That’s because going somewhere new (whether near or far) adds that element of external novelty to the mix.

Campbell’s archetypal “Hero’s Journey” (outlined in all its glory in The Hero With a Thousand Faces) inspired me to think about all the ways we grow through travel. Here are three main stages which contribute to our transformation, loosely based on the famous monomyth:

1) The Call to Adventure

An invitation to a wedding… a wish to see a childhood friend… an illuminating book or movie… whatever it is that provides the impetus to get up and go, we just say yes! And with that decision, our minds take us to those far-off shores. We envision the beach at sunset or the snow-capped mountains. We make lists, contact airlines, and read guides for travel tips. And already, the health benefits are underway! Recent studies shared by Robert Sapolsky, author of Behave, showed that the anticipation of a reward (in this case, travel) releases more of the feel-good hormone dopamine than does the reward itself! That’s right–even entertaining thoughts of visiting new places is good for us. As a self-professed change junkie, I can vouch for that!

2) Crossing the Threshold to the Great Wilderness

From the moment we’ve boarded the plane (or boat or train or minivan), we’ve entered our version of the uncharted wild. We relish the green rolling hills passing by. We marvel at cotton-candy clouds or sparkling blue waters. Maybe we decide to chat with that quirky man in the yellow jacket and discover something surprising we have in common. In any case, we find ourselves settling into being unsettled. We relax, if even a little. According to a study published in Forbes, 89% of travelers interviewed reported lower stress levels after just one day away from their usual surroundings.

Once we arrive (if we’ve planned a destination), our neurons are still firing at peak levels. We study social cues, especially when exposed to an unfamiliar culture. We take in the rich tapestries, the rough-hewn ceilings, the graveled path through the pines. Even if we visit a place close to home but novel to us, we’re called to attention amidst all the newness.

We may hit a snag or two along the way; but then again, what mythic movie hero gets by without a little conflict? Right: none! Because there’s no growth in that. The dragon (either within or without) must be slain before anyone can become a hero. Thankfully, we don’t need literal monsters to grow through our travels. Moving past our fear of the unknown and embracing the beauty in the unfamiliar is already the stuff of legends!

3) The Return, and the Gift

Most mythic quests lead to a treasure or prize of some sort. You know–a room full of gold, a sword, an elixir, or another object representing the hero’s triumph. You and I may gather little gift-shop trinkets for our friends, but the real gift we return with is far more valuable. Studies led by Columbia professor Adam Galinsky have found that travel–especially overseas or across borders–increases “both cognitive flexibility and depth and integrativeness of thought,” along with “the ability to make deep connections between disparate forms.” In other words, travel makes us more creative! And this is just one of its many gifts we can share in every other aspect of our lives. Added to this are the lessons and information we’ve learned, the new friends we’ve made, and the self-discovery that comes with every brave leap outside of our comfort zone.

Deeply ingrained in the human psyche, the hero’s journey has served as a blueprint for some of the world’s greatest tales. As Rav Ashlag said, “Once one has chosen an environment, one is subjected to it like the clay in the hands of the potter.” What we do with that clay is ultimately up to us.

This week, plan to explore somewhere new–be it across the world or on the other side of your hometown. You never know what adventure awaits… but you can be sure of this: When we dare to step out into the great unknown, we are sure to become the heroes in our own stories!

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Because Every Day is Independence Day

Looking out upon a sky full of colorful bursts of light, I found myself thinking about another kind of independence: the independence of mind. One of our most sacred gifts, this is the freedom we each have to interface with the present moment and to direct our thoughts within it. It’s a gift that has always been as readily available to the king as to the pauper–the original equal opportunity!

Often taken for granted (human nature is great at that), this incredible power drives even our most mundane decisions. I’m talking about basic autonomy: she likes her coffee black; he prefers it with two sugars and a cream. Or consider my views on roller coasters, which have shifted twice! As a child, I loved them; later, I found them terrifying (likely linked to adrenal fatigue)… but then recently, I learned to love them again! Which goes to show how something we didn’t like last week might appeal to us tomorrow.

Yet beyond the concrete world of experiences, our independent minds can do so much more. The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves are not fairy tales; they are the co-creators of our lives! And, as Kabbalah teaches, our thoughts are always ours to change. We can accept, reject, adjust, or revise any of them. Even the staunchest of opinions still has inherent flexibility. There’s a porous quality within most, if not all, ideas and ideals.

This doesn’t mean we can’t hold our most sacred principles close or that we shouldn’t fight for them when necessary. But we are all the wiser and more connected to the Creator when we open ourselves to see the full view–to do our best to understand both or all sides of a situation. When we keep the windows open, the breeze can blow through. We cool our judgments. We can both stand strong and bend and grow through the gentle movements of life.

When things are difficult or seem overwhelming, we still have a choice as to how we will meet the moment. Reflecting on his experience in Auschwitz, survivor and psychotherapist Viktor Frankl described how “it is possible to practice the ‘art of living’ even in a concentration camp.” Frankl realized that, although everything else had been removed, the freedom to choose his attitude could never be taken from him! He survived unbearable conditions while surrounded by hopelessness and fear because he knew that neither they nor anything else could eradicate his fundamental freedom of thought.

Although this is an extreme example, it underscores what Rav Berg meant when he said that “Consciousness is everything.” Still, it’s a side effect of being human to feel helpless at times… to react rashly… to give into fear, insecurity, or judgment too easily. A few years back, we discovered that our daughter Abigail’s struggles with reading were due to dyslexia. Rather than sinking into a textbook diagnosis, we saw it as a difference with many positive aspects. (Not to challenge the clinical validity of the term; it’s just that a slight shift in labels can greatly affect outcomes!) Since then, Abigail has embraced the “superpowers” that have come with and through her difference. In fact, she and I are co-writing a book series on how your differences can be your greatest gift. Change the story, change your life!

Your own life experience is a marvel of potential. It’s your trademark and your treasure. Because your version of events, your opinion on this or that, and your version of this day is singular in the entirety of creation!

What are YOU choosing to notice, connect with, and be grateful for in this moment? And, if you are facing a challenge in your life, how might you redirect your thinking to bring more light and positivity to your handling of it?

As Eckhart Tolle wrote in his book The Power of Now: “Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will miraculously transform your whole life.”

This week, remember that no matter where we are, we are always free in our minds. In that freedom, we can roam and daydream and imagine and create. We can move crowds with our passions and change other minds with our reason. We can waste our time looking for all that’s missing or wrong in the here and now, OR we can work with it and make it better. Make it matter.

In doing so, we grow to epitomize the spirit of true independence. We create a “land of the free” within ourselves. And when we light up inside, the whole universe lights up with us–just like fireworks in a summer sky.

The post Because Every Day is Independence Day appeared first on Monica Berg.

By the Light of the Cancer Moon

The moon inspires wolves to howl, tides to turn, and lovers to dance beneath its silvery light. That mysterious, mesmerizing orb has been the subject of inquiry and fascination for scientists, poets, and storytellers since the beginning of human existence. And during this month of Cancer (Tammuz in Hebrew), we can connect to its luminous energy more directly than at any other time of year.

That’s because Cancer–symbolized by the crab–is the only sign in the zodiac ruled by the moon. And, since Cancer is also a water sign, the cosmic influence is all the more powerful. Twice each day, the tides of every large body of water on our planet are directed by the moon’s gravitational pull. In some places, the tide may move just a few inches; in others, it may swell or recede 50 feet or more! Likewise, the emotional shifts we experience this month, for better or worse, may be deep and profound–even life-altering.

The good news: this cosmic fluctuation presents incredible opportunities for personal growth! Emotions are like an internal barometric gauge indicating our “state of being.” And all too often, we choose to either ignore them or pass them off as irrational or inconsequential. This is a missed opportunity! Our deeper feelings are meant to guide us. They bring our inner truths to light. And they will keep surfacing, even if we take out the broom and try to sweep them under the rug.

When we truly listen to our emotions, we tune into the most important quality we can cultivate: the quality of DESIRE. To the Kabbalists, desire is a key impetus that moves us forward in our lives!

Kabbalah teaches that the world of senses comprises only 5% of what is out there. The other 95% is hidden, much like the dark side of the moon.We’ve all heard of taking things at “face value,” which can lead us astray, just as the face some see on the moon doesn’t quite tell the whole story. That’s why it’s important to look beyond what our senses tell us–be it in a person’s behavior, a current job or personal dynamic, or elsewhere in our lives. Taking the time to gather information and comprehend the bigger picture can steer us to the right decisions with better clarity.

Overlooking the hidden truths may also lead us into judgment–a common pitfall during the month of Cancer. That said, inside every challenge lies an opportunity! Again, the key is to get in touch with yourself. Turn that negative self-talk or thinking into positive affirmations. And the less you judge yourself, the less you will judge others. This is an ideal time for meditating, taking a spiritual class, or practicing self-exploration through art, journaling, or other expressive avenues. Better still, channel that growing self-awareness towards improving others’ lives as well. Reach out to someone in need. Connect in new ways to your community. As Rav Berg suggested, we are what we share!

This month, take a moment to center yourself. Then ask: What do I REALLY want?

If you don’t know, make it your mission to find out. Explore your feelings more. Dare more. Dig more (that’s what crabs do best!). Know that you are worthy of happiness and fulfillment! And when you DO discover your deepest desire, get out of your shell and take a step towards making it happen!

We may look at the moon in awe and wonder, but remember–that shimmering radiance is a reflection of the sun. The light that we share works in the same way. The more we know and understand ourselves, the more we radiate authenticity into the world. Like stars, we shine into those shadowed spaces… until the whole world begins to glow like the full moon on a dark night.

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