Bridget Chase's Blog, page 3
September 23, 2018
Peppermint Pyramids: Parody Fiction
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Peppermint Pyramids: Kindle Ebook (short story) by Bridget Chase
Jennifer Garner’s daughter and husband were murdered, bad; like, in cold blood, bad- the coldest of blood, bad- if the blood were chilled in a freezer at Dairy Queen and then poured over ice, and served in Antarctica, bad. The distraught mother wants revenge, because nothing honors dead family better than merciless ‘n bloody murder. She enlists the help of Dick Tracy and begins hunting for the gang responsible. One of the gang member’s tattoo, leads our heroes to seek out a time machine and sets a path for ancient Egypt. Success rests on finding one man; but in searching him out, it brings new enemies who aren’t human; in fact, they were created to TERMINATE all humans!
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About Bridget Chase
Bridget Chase was a tough, intelligent police detective in the 1930’s till early 40’s. His career was one wrought with murders, poisons, secret doors, Chinamen, twin siblings, and slightly dim witted sidekicks. Mr. Chase’s body was discovered frozen along the snowy banks of eastern Pennsylvania on December 9th 1943. He died while on a case chasing a fugitive charged with extortion.
Bridget Chase was an avid writer in his off hours and he wrote many novels along with short stories across a variety of genres. His writings went unknown for nearly seventy years and changed hands many times until reaching a online indie magazine publication, Yellow Hat Dick, in 2013,.
Yellow Hat Dick magazine began to publish Bridget Chase’s short stories on their website. Following positive reception and a growing interest in Mr. Chase’s weird sensibilities, bizarre story lines, and misogynistic over tones, Yellow Hat Dick magazine gained legal control over Bridget’s writing. In 2015 they began to publish his works under the publishing company Chase Entertainment.
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September 6, 2018
Opracalypse: Satire Fiction
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Opracalypse, Kindle Ebook (short story) by Bridget Chase
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Oprah’s been dieting, and dieting hard. Her stomach comes alive and takes control changing that day time tv host into a whale like mutant. She goes on a rampage and her stomach is craving something in particular.
Mila Kunis scuba dives to the lost city of Atlantis. Upon arriving she is witness to its horrible destruction. From the testimony of a few living dolphins, Mila is told of a terrible beast who is responsible for the end of their civilization.
Tom Cruise is training with Richard Simmons to get buff for a movie. He decides that he wants to become a super hero and help mankind. When his doorbell rings a woman brings fate right to his front door.
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About Bridget Chase
Need money for booze ‘n drugs; dayum b&tches ain’t cheap, ya’ hear?
Whole Milk needz his self ta’ finance ‘a hot tub ‘n sh&t.
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September 4, 2018
Speed Muppets 3- Parody Fiction
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Speed Muppets 3, Kindle eBook (short story) by Bridget Chase
Hey, you ever need yerself ‘a vacay?
Well, these Muppets did.
Kermit da’ Frog, Grover, Dr. Twerk, Miss Piggy, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Babs Bunny were out having some fun on a motha’f&ckin’ boat, when, comin’ up fast on ’em was da’ Police, blarin’ dem sirens, and Keanue Reeves shoutin, “Hey, you there. Yeah, you; there is a bomb on dat boat; whatever ya do, don’t slow down or it go, BOOM! You’s has to stay above three hundred and fifty miles ‘n hour or people be goin’, ‘Ouchy!'”
Okay, so a bomb on a boat, what’s the big deal? Well, it wasn’t none, I guess, till Leatherface texted Kermit a picture of himself standin’ in front a fully loaded fighter jet ‘n holdin’ a lease receipt. Yep, those Muppets gotz some problems cause Leatherface is comin’ at them with some missiles ‘n sh*t. Luckily, anyone dats been in dis sitch-eation before knows that there ain’t no better man ta’ have aboard yer ship than that Hollywood’s Explosive Expert, Keanu Reeves. Yes sir, he climbs aboard this adventure, he sure does.
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About Bridget Chase
Need money for booze ‘n drugs; dayum b&tches ain’t cheap, ya’ hear?
Whole Milk needz his self ta’ finance ‘a hot tub ‘n sh&t.
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August 31, 2018
Peppermint Pyramids: Parody Fiction
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Peppermint Pyramids: Kindle Ebook (short story) by Bridget Chase
Jennifer Garner’s daughter and husband were murdered, bad; like, in cold blood, bad- the coldest of blood, bad- if the blood were chilled in a freezer at Dairy Queen and then poured over ice, and served in Antarctica, bad. The distraught mother wants revenge, because nothing honors dead family better than merciless ‘n bloody murder. She enlists the help of Dick Tracy and begins hunting for the gang responsible. One of the gang member’s tattoo, leads our heroes to seek out a time machine and sets a path for ancient Egypt. Success rests on finding one man; but in searching him out, it brings new enemies who aren’t human; in fact, they were created to TERMINATE all humans!
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About Bridget Chase
Need money for booze ‘n drugs; dayum b&tches ain’t cheap, ya’ hear?
White Bread need his self ta’ lease ‘a hot tub ‘n sh&t.
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August 26, 2018
1983- Science Fiction
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Sylvester Stallone finds himself burdened by the task of writing the screenplay, ‘Stayin’ Alive’. A dark figure appears that claims to be able to help him create a masterpiece. Sly questions his sanity, but something larger seems to be invested in the future of the movie.
John Travolta, while waiting for the script to be finished, becomes infatuated with a women from his dreams. Every night while he sleeps, he sees her at a train station, but is unable to get close to her. During the day, to combat the growing heart ache, John loses himself to the pleasures of a Virtual Reality world.
Yvonne Strahovski works as an actress. ‘Neural Recorder’s have left her feeling empty in her work. Worse off, she nightly dreams about a man at a train station that she can never quite reach.
‘Stayin’ Alive’ premiered at American Theaters in 1983, but the real story behind its creation is ‘one’ hidden in the Hollywood shadows.
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Bridget Chase is an American author who primarily specializes in humorous short stories. He was born in Houston Texas; studied art at the University of Texas San Antonio (bore) where he received his Bachelor of Fine Art. He was a school teacher for many years, but left because it sucked ass. Bridget currently resides in Boulder Colorado where he has an art studio and works everyday writing new stories and eating pizza.
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August 25, 2018
The MEG: Ryan Shark- Parody Fiction
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The MEG: Ryan Shark, Kindle Book (short story) by Bridget Chase
A huge f&ckin’ shark is seen in the deep waters off the Chinese coast. A bad ass hero by the name of Johnny Taylor is called in to stop this thing with the help of some oceanic research team. Why is one dude called in to stop a Megalodon shark? Because that’s how American f&ckin’ Action Films are done, bit$hes!
So we got this bad ass dude, some hot chicks, and vehicles with Tom Hank’s face CGI-ed on its steel sides. Now’s time to hunt this shark and also find out what strange attributes are unique to this prehistoric killing machine, which science says shouldn’t exist. Well, science is f&ckin’ wrong; and that’s nothin’ new; so, lets go kill us a huge ass shark by shootin’ it from a helicopter, ’cause thats the only kinda plan that could get Jason Statham to sign on to a movie role. Oh, and how old is MEG Ryan?
“It’s a living fossil. Thought to be extinct for two million years. Does two million years sound like a long enough time? Okay, cool; as long as people understand that was a long time ago and makes them scared.”
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About Bridget Chase
Bridget Chase is an American author who primarily specializes in humorous short stories. He was born in Houston Texas; studied art at the University of Texas San Antonio (bore) where he received his Bachelor of Fine Art. He was a school teacher for many years, but left because it sucked ass. Bridget currently resides in Boulder Colorado where he has an art studio and works everyday writing new stories and eating pizza.
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George Washington I SMELL PUSSY- Satire Fiction
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George Washington I Smell Pussy: Book 1, Kindle book (short story) by Bridget Chase
BOOK:1
Harvey Weinstein is cursed. All he can smell is pussy. “Like a can of sardines in oil!” He thinks a street walker that he had relations with, did this too him. Harvey, with the help of his best friend, the ghost of Christopher Columbus, embark on an adventure to undo this ungodly curse. The journey takes them to the Wild West and pits them against an unlikely adversary, George Washington. This historically accurate piece of fiction features raunchy comedy, time travel paradoxes, as well as sci-fi weaponry.
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About Bridget Chase
Bridget Chase is an American author who primarily specializes in humorous short stories. He was born in Houston Texas; studied art at the University of Texas San Antonio (bore) where he received his Bachelor of Fine Art. He was a school teacher for many years, but left because it sucked ass. Bridget currently resides in Boulder Colorado where he has an art studio and works everyday writing new stories and eating pizza.
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August 24, 2018
Golden Boys- Parody Fiction
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Golden Boys, Kindle Book (short story) by Bridget Chase
Hollywood has given the Green Light to an action packed reboot of the hit TV show ‘The Golden Girls’. Brought on to play the Golden Four are Ben Affleck as Blanche, Matt Damon as Rose, Harrison Ford as Dorothy, and Kevin Smith as Sophia. A drug cartel moves into the Golden Girls’ Miami subdivision, and they ain’t havin’ it! The drug scum are nosing around looking for someone named Casey, and the Golden Four take action to take their suburbs back!
Ben Affleck just finished his role as Batman. The role took a toll on his emotions, as well as his marriage. He decides to throw himself ‘fully’ into the role of Blanche in the Golden Girls action reboot. His already fragmented mind is further shattered when the Hollywood star gets involved with a new drug.
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Bridget Chase is an American author who primarily specializes in humorous short stories. He was born in Houston Texas; studied art at the University of Texas San Antonio (bore) where he received his Bachelor of Fine Art. He was a school teacher for many years, but left because it sucked ass. Bridget currently resides in Boulder Colorado where he has an art studio and works everyday writing new stories and eating pizza.
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August 23, 2018
Atomic Tomei- Satire Fiction
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Atomic Tomei, Kindle book (short story) by Bridget Chase
An old Mel Gibson, lost to despair from a fickle Hollywood, travels back in time to re-write his own destiny. With the desire to be ‘King of Entertainment’ he plans to destroy California back in 1992. Christian Slater is the police officer assigned to stopping Mel’s destruction. During a raid, Christian follows Mel through a dimensional wormhole ‘back in time’ to 1992. With no hope of stopping Mel, Christian enlist the help of himself from the past, as well as the unstoppable power, Marissa Tomei, who has been quarantined to an underground bunker for the safety of all mankind.
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About Bridget Chase
Bridget Chase is an American author who primarily specializes in humorous short stories. He was born in Houston Texas; studied art at the University of Texas San Antonio (bore) where he received his Bachelor of Fine Art. He was a school teacher for many years, but left because it sucked ass. Bridget currently resides in Boulder Colorado where he has an art studio and works everyday writing new stories and eating pizza.
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Cloning Clooney- Satire Fiction
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Cloning Clooney, Kindle book (short story) by Bridget Chase
Welcome to the future. Aliens have landed on earth. Their evolution is unstable and rapid. An AI singularity, named Zeroday created by man, has become obsessed with George Clooney. The planet is now at war. The last few members of the military are on a quest to find the only remaining strand of Clooney DNA. The fate of the world rests on the owner of this Hollywood icon’s biological code.
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Bridget Chase is an American author who primarily specializes in humorous short stories. He was born in Houston Texas; studied art at the University of Texas San Antonio (bore) where he received his Bachelor of Fine Art. He was a school teacher for many years, but left because it sucked ass. Bridget currently resides in Boulder Colorado where he has an art studio and works everyday writing new stories and eating pizza.
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