R.J. Young's Blog, page 17

BOYFRIEND TIP: Pour box wine into an expensive-sounding wine bottle before she comes over. You've just saved $145.00 AND your relationship.

Be yourself actually means FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE BE ANYBODY ELSE!!!

In my bathroom, I'm kind of a big deal.

BOYFRIEND TIP: Compliment her breasts.

Change your middle name to "Awesome." You know, just in case there was any doubt.

"Dude, I'm getting a Dell."

"Dude, I'm getting a Dell." - guy who is way too excited about buying a computer...

BOYFRIEND TIP: If she's going to make you watch sappy love movies, she can learn to play Halo.

You count sheep, while I count Jesus Shuttlesworth's jumpers.

You plan to get smashed this weekend. I get that. But if you're going to drink irresponsibly, please take pictures and put them on the web.

The devil without a pitchfork is like Michele Bachmann without a corndog.