Tabitha Caplinger's Blog: TabithaCaplinger.com, page 8

I #LiveChosen- Emerald

It was no accident that I met Tabitha when I did. It was no accident that my book and hers could have been siblings. It was no accident that her hashtag so closely resembled what I wanted to do with my life and my own books. It was no accident…I’ve told my testimony a few times. For those who haven’t heard it, my life changed drastically in my early twenties.See, I’ve always been a bit pudgy. Okay, more than pudgy. I was probably the biggest girl in my class for the entirety that I was in school. I was fat. That’s what I was called. That was what I called myself. And as I grew older, those derogatory words somehow made their way down into my soul and became part of my identity. My truth at the time was that I was fat, ugly, and worthless. I was tainted. I would never be loved. I didn’t deserve love.Lies. All of them, but for years, for most of my life, I believed them. I let them consume me until I was depressed and useless. But then God… (Don’t you just love that phrase? Don’t you love how God can take you from useless and depressed to something more?)God showed me that I was His. I was His daughter. I was molded and created by Him. He wanted me. I didn’t feel like anyone could ever want me, yet here He was, proving me wrong. I was loved! I finally felt beautiful for once in my life, and it was then that everything for me changed.I no longer let those negative thoughts rule my life. I finally listened to the people around me who told me I was beautiful. I knew that my life would forever be changed, and I couldn’t keep it from anyone else.A few years after this revelation hit me, I wrote this book, Entertaining Angels. It was unlike anything I’d ever written before, and it scared me. But the message was so strong. The message had to get put out there. So, I published it.And it turned into something more than just a book. It became a message. God loves you. God has chosen you for greater things. In the book, an angel is sent to help show a young girl just how much she is loved, that her Creator loves her more than she’ll ever know. I’m not marketing my book. I’m telling you that it’s my story. An angel didn’t physically manifest, but the events that led to my life-changing moment was certainly orchestrated by a loving God would do anything to prove to His child that she was so much more than she thought about herself.I never in a million years would have thought that I would end up here, advocating women to see themselves in a new light. God used an entertaining story to show me that I had much more to do for Him, and I couldn’t live out my purpose without first realizing who I was in Christ. So that is what my ministry has sort of become about. It’s what I teach my kids in youth class as their youth leader. It’s what I try and spread online. You were created for so much more.Take Esther for example. Her story is my absolute favorite one. She was devastatingly beautiful which gave her favor with everyone around her. And let me tell you, the same favor and beauty that was on Esther is on you as well. It took me forever to realize that, and I don’t want people missing out on anything that God has for them. I missed out on so much because I couldn’t see past the hurt and hatred of myself. I didn’t want that to happen to anyone else.Before all of this, I believed that I didn’t have a purpose. That God could never use someone who was so ugly and fat to do anything in the Kingdom. I was living in the shadows, constantly hating myself, but God told me that it was time to stop hiding. I had to step out in the light. I had a purpose. I have a purpose, and my purpose has become my mission. My mission has become to show others that no matter what you’re going through in your life, no matter how you feel about yourself, no matter what others may think, you’re beautiful. You’re never alone. You are worthy. God loves you. He created you for more. It’s time that you step up and #LiveChosen. As Tabitha has said, it’s time “to live your purpose on purpose.”That’s what I have done. I’ve taken my purpose to help you see your purpose. I #LiveChosen because I am chosen.“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you;Before you were born I sanctified you;I ordained you a prophet to the nations.”-Jeremiah 1:5Emerald Barnes resides in a small town in Mississippi and has the accent to prove it. She’s an auntie, a youth leader, a Whovian, a little bit of a nerd, a reader, a writer, and a family-oriented person. God is number One in her life, and she thanks Him continuously for His love and favor. She’s addicted to tv and binge-watching shows, and she has a thing for superheroes.Connect with Emerald...Website BlogPinterestFacebookTwitterStreet TeamInstagramGoodreadsGet Emerald's Books...Entertaining AngelBefore We Say I DoDelivered by AngelsRead Me DeadThe MarkedThanks for reading Emerald's #LiveChosen story. There is still more to come so I hope you will come back. Don't forget to enter theGIVEAWAY!!

I #LiveChosen- Victoria

I am so lucky to get to call this demon slayer a friend. I love her heaps! And I love her story of living chosen.“Its better to make a mistake and be real with people than it is to look perfect and be a complete fake.”Check out her story!It means so much to me that you're here! There are more #LiveChosen stories to come so check back. And don't forget to enter theGIVEAWAY!!

I #LiveChosen- Kara

What does being Chosen mean for me?  There are three moments in my life that stand out for me as I consider this question.  Three key times when I felt wholeheartedly Chosen for something different.The first time was when I was child.  My dad took me to see Star Wars and it resonated with me, made me see movies and storytelling in a whole new way.  I don’t remember anything detailed from that experience but I had stars in my eyes leaving that movie and have not forgotten that feeling.The second time was when I was 17 years old. I had just learned that being a Christian was not about religion but about a personal walk/relationship with God.  I had known God and had attended church all my life, but at that point I distinctly remember choosing to love Him with all my heart.  I had no idea at the time what that decision implied but I remember being in love with God and wanting Him above all else.The third time that stands out was after ending an eight-year relationship with someone I was convinced I would spend my life with and turned out it was just a channel God used to get me back in His arms with fervor.  I was so devastated and ashamed of how much I had invested on the wrong guy.… NOT knowing how I would heal from this, I gave God the only thought that made sense to me at the time.  I spoke the first and only ultimatum I’ve ever given God, kill me or make me stronger.  Again, didn’t have any idea what path this would bring but I knew I was giving God my whole, damaged heart once again at 28, and deciding to trust Him with all the brokenness within me.  Yes, for me, surrendering my heart to God happens more than once and it means something different every time.Accepting God’s call on your life, being Chosen, means there is one or more struggles you are meant to overcome.  I see fictional characters like Lara Croft, Tris Prior, Tally from Uglies, Tessa from Makai Queen, Grey Alexander from Jupiter Winds, Leia from Star Wars, Aunt Claire from Bloodline, Gabi from Bergren’s River of Time Series, Sadie from The Tethered World and Semara from The Neumarian Chronicles by Ciara Knight……. and I want to be like THEM!  They are strong, fearless, beautiful, empowered young characters and despite being take from their comfort zones, they find they have the courage needed for their unpredictable journey.  However, they each had one or more life-changing struggles to overcome before they reached victory and breakthrough…..and sometimes that journey led them completely away from what they were expecting to do.  Yes, they are fictional characters but I relate to their stories, I’m motivated by their stories, and I learn from their stories.There are two struggles I’m currently experiencing in being Chosen and even though I’m learning through faith how to trust God in a deeper way, there are days I feel like screaming in my discouragement (this is totally acceptable in case you were wondering, God values when we’re real with Him).  One is figuring out what my purpose is for 2017 and beyond.  I’m 38 years old, Waiting to publish my first book, Waiting to meet my husband (I’m NOT dating and the men in my life are my dad, two brothers and my nephew…..greatest men I know), and Waiting for several prayers to be answered in powerful ways for me and my family.  Waiting does not mean being bored and restless, although there are days like that.  It means understanding that God is working tirelessly on something special for my life and I have to trust Him BEFORE I see it happening.  There is healing, learning, growing, and transforming power going on while the Waiting is in motion.  The Waiting time also gives me a season of drawing closer to God in my desperation, it leads to a closeness to the Almighty that would not have been possible otherwise.  Never easy, but necessary for me in what it means to be Chosen.  This is an entry from my prayer journal that was revealed to me in the Waiting season….I’m speeding away in a car with the window open.  I’m skinny, my hair is long and flying everywhere, but I can’t see any of that in my determination to get away.  I’m speeding past cars, but only a few are around me.  Jesus is riding a motorcycle to the left of me—off road—speeding to catch up with me.  Every time He gets close I yell for Him to “get away” or “leave me alone!”  I’m not worth loving, not worth the trouble, not worthy of Him.  However, He’s relentless and refuses to back off.  He loves me too much to let me go.Behind Jesus are all the breakthroughs, promises, calling, and blessings that belong to me, but I’m going in the wrong direction and can’t see them or I’m too trapped in myself to turn back.  In the front passenger seat is a nasty, murky, hot puddle with bubbles….it’s Fear and it mocks me and taunts me.  I don’t look at it during this pursuit, but I accept its lies.  In the backseat are my Addictions, Loneliness, Insecurities, and Inadequacies….even some Regrets and Unforgiveness I thought for sure I had let go of.  They are also mocking me and taunting me, making sure I feel unworthy of Jesus and our relationship even as He continues to gain on me.  Something in the road finally stops me and I have to come to a screeching halt.  The car skids out slightly and then stops crooked in the road.Jesus calmly stops his bike and approaches me with purpose.  I’m angry and crying.  My Beloved is here, can I handle this?  His approach is gentle yet firm, he is not the least put out by reaction.  “Don’t you realize what I’ve been through to hold onto these things?” I ask Him referring to my passengers that have been burdening me for miles.  Jesus has reached my open window and is unfazed by my anguish.  The passengers are shaken by His presence, but they also want to defend themselves.  Jesus silences them with a small gesture, his eyes never leaving mine.  They each cower in their positions and immediately release their hold from me.  I’m no longer angry and sit there quietly in disbelief.  He gently leans into the window and puts his forehead to mine; both His hands rest softly on my face pulling me closer so I can draw love and strength from Him.“Please let them go and come with me.  They don’t belong to you and they’re terrified of who you really are.  Everything behind me belongs to you.  Everything I have is yours.”  At this point my eyes are closed and I’m slightly weeping as He continues to draw me near.  I’m not looking at what’s behind Him, but I can FEEL the freedom and the life He’s referring to.  How can such beauty and love be mine for the taking?  He speaks once more but my heart has already decided.  “Please trust me.  Come with me and let me love you.”  I can no longer speak, but the tension and determination that consumed my body now leaves as I take a deep breath.  I’m not even aware of how this happens, but Jesus has removed me from this destructive car and is holding me carefully as he walks away.  I simply cling to him, there’s nothing else for me to do and suddenly I have new fervor to bask in him.Since his motorcycle is no longer useful he waits for our new transportation….the glow of the new life is still in the background, but right now it’s just us and that’s all I want.  A hummer pulls up slowly and Jesus positions himself in the driver’s seat with me comfortably in his lap.  My head and one of my hands are cradled against his chest.  He pauses for a moment to pour more love and healing into our connection as I rest in him.  Soon after, he drives on the off road again saying something about taking the road less traveled and that I’m finally going home.  Later its shown to me that Jesus knew my heart all along, that this rescue was to show me how much he loved me.The other struggle I’m currently experiencing is a stronghold I’ve had for years, but latelyseems to have reached a new level of self-destructiveness for me.  I pull my hair out. It’s some kind of nervous habit, it has increased the last couple of years, and it has gotten out of control.  It’s torn, uneven, damaged, grayed, and it has caused me to feel ugly and ashamed when looking in the mirror.  I’m fighting myself NOT to pull on it even as I write this, but as uncomfortable as I am sharing about this very personal journey God has me on, if it can help someone else going through similar feelings, then I consider this a blessing.I’ve wanted long hair since I was a little girland my hair finally goes past my shoulders and a little down my back, but the front and sides are totally pulled out.  Even though this is a current struggle, I believe that my hair and the breakthrough I’ve been waiting on for my hair is part of what it takes to being Chosen.  EVERY struggle leads to healing when it comes to living Chosen and no matter how much I have suffered with hair pulling, I believe God is working through me to bring restoration.  Here is another entry from my prayer journal for my hair…..To the hair on my head:Please forgive me….I have been hung up on thinking wrong thoughts, feeling helpless and having doubts that were lies from the enemy.  I took it out on you and it has become a stronghold, it has gone too far, it has made me desperate, it is something I’m determined to overcome and heal from.  I have pulled you out, mangled you, tore you apart, shredded you while sleeping and awake, destroyed you, and mistreated you.  No amount of nice haircuts or hair products have restored you and just looking at you in the mirror has made me distraught, ashamed, discouraged, and heartbroken.  Since I was a child I have always desired long, healthy, glowing, and easy to manage hair.  Since I was a teenager I have been pulling you out and praying you would come back to life, praying for a miracle to save you and restore you!  This year (2015) I have mistreated you the worst and I am DEEPLY sorry for all of it!  You and I have been through a lot, but I have wronged you with my stronghold and I have allowed my incredibly anointed hands to mistreat you in the worst way.  You are so soft and comforting to touch and the next thing I know I have ripped you from my head!  I feel so ugly and ashamed, but then I can’t stop and I have to call on God to help me!  I have worn gloves to bed, worn hair clips to bed, sat on my hands, and used hair repair products.  Nothing has worked.  Please forgive me, that is my plea.  I am writing this out and giving it to God’s throne.  This does not excuse my destructive behavior, but I believe it’s a step in the right direction.  I want to set things right between us, to have a healthy and glorified relationship with you.  You are a gift from God to me and I am grateful to you.  I want you to be free, to grow, to be glorious, never having knots or frizz, and to always be one of many beautiful parts of me.  You are part of my temple, part of my holiness, part of my everlasting beauty.  I want to grow old with you and honor you.  I want to fill you with life.  Thank you for your forgiveness, you bless me!  *Dedicated the song, Please Forgive Me by Bryan Adams to my hair….chorus only*I’m NOT anything like those fictional characters I mentioned earlier, but that’s great because I am EXACTLY who God wants me to be, which is better!  I’m real, I’m Chosen, I’m Christ strengthened, I’m holy, and as I’m encouraged, I love to encourage others!  I’m learning that no matter what I see in the mirror (dry skin, pulled hair, gray hair, or hairs on my chin), I’m still beautiful.  I’m learning that Christ sees nothing but amazing and glorious beauty when He looks upon me.  I’m learning that I’m worthy no matter what my struggles and circumstances are because He says I’m worthy.  I’m learning to choose fearlessness no matter what seemingly impossible dreams are before me.  I’m learning to trust Him in the Waiting.  I’m learning to hand over every doubt and regret I have into His capable Hands, to let Him use them for His purposes.  I’m learning to stop overthinking things I have no control over and simply allow Him to love me.  I didn’t choose this life, this destiny, or the calling before me.  HE chose ME, my part is to trust Him and be obedient to that call.MANY times these last ten years, during my most heartbreaking moments, I have questioned Him on choosing me.  My anger, my fears, my frustrations…..how can I POSSIBLY manage to heal and be this person He says I am???  He makes it clear to me over and over; I am on His strength and He will do all the hard work to equip me as needed, His love is enough.  HE will make a way where there is NO WAY!  I don’t have to know all the answers, I don’t have to understand what the plan for my life is right away, I don’t have to have everything figured out, I can even make mistakes and I’m allowed to have off days when I don’t feel like doing anything.  He talks me down from the ledge every time, holds me, fills me with His peace, romances me, makes me laugh (mostly through remembering a funny movie line), and assures me that I’m safe with Him.  There’s NOTHING I can to ever make Him stop loving me, there’s NOTHING I can do that will void out or cancel the purpose He has for my life, there’s NOTHING the enemy can throw at me that will steal what God has in store for me.  And on days where I don’t think I can take another step forward, He’s right there carrying me and meeting me in that sadness to rescue me once more (makes me think of Falcor from Neverending Story, where Atreyu is about to drown in the swamp and the wolf wants to eat him, and at the last possible moment, Falcor sweeps down and gets Atreyu out of that mud and certain death, HUGE RELIEF…..only Christ is a billion times better of a rescue).That’s what #LivingChosen means to me….it’s a struggle of a journey that leads to healing, overcoming, and total breakthrough.  It’s beautiful, heartbreaking, uncomfortable and soothing.  It’s learning to grow, heal, and trust God in the easy moments and in the tough ones.  It’s going forward even when you’re exhausted because this is where God has led you and you won’t give up.  It’s knowing I’m healed, beautiful, loved and living a purpose-filled life even as I wait. That’s what living Chosen means to me and I wouldn’t want it any other way.  Christ is worth every bit of it and I stand with Him through it all!  Like Tabitha always states, I am Chosen. I am Powerful. I am Loved. I am Never Alone.  Thanks for reading my testimony, God bless youYou can get more inspiration from Kara by following her onPinterest. And here's a music video to "All I Need To Be" By Fireflight.Thanks so much for reading about Kara's journey to #LiveChosen.  I hope that you will check out all of the #LiveChosen stories coming this month.  Be sure to enter theGIVEAWAYtoo!

I #LiveChosen- Welcome

EEK!! I have been planning and prepping all of this for weeks and it's finally here...#LiveChosen month.#LiveChosen is nothing new for me. I wrote aFacebook noteall about how it became a thing. The gist is it is the marriage of my ministry and my writing. It's the why behind what I do. I want to help people find their purpose and to live for it on purpose. Not just because that sounds cool but because I truly believe it is only when we find our value in God, our identity in Him, that we will be fulfilled. Everything about you was created by a very strategic and intentional God and it all speaks to your purpose. But it starts with knowing who you are."Living chosen is not about what you do but who you are."I hope that you will come back throughout the month to be encouraged by the other #LiveChosen stories that are coming (they are good) and that you will join the conversation by commenting, chatting on social media, and even entering theGIVEAWAY!! 

#LiveChosen- Huntress Edition

EEK! I am so excited to connect with Julie Hall and for her to share her #LiveChosen thoughts on my little blog. I mean we both write about awesome chicks who kick demon butt. #demonslayers #girlpowerSeriously though, Julie's words are beautiful and encouraging. So grab a cup of coffee or tea and cozy up for a few minutes to really let the truth of this message sink in and then stalk Julie online and buy her book. Pretty please and thank you. :)PS: Make sure you read all the way through so you don't miss the GIVEAWAY info at the end. ;) (Books and Starbucks are on the line people!)When I first read about Tabitha’s #LifeChosen mission, I thought, “Oh yes! This! This people! This is the thing!” I looked around, desperate to share this truth with someone else, but . . . I’m a writer. Meaning I work from home with my two trusted writing buddies—Bear and Coco, my furry “babies” who incidentally don’t understand people talk. Bust! But nevertheless, it’s a topic I’m excited to get the opportunity to share my take on and how it relates to Audrey, the main character in my novel, Huntress.You see, my excitement over Tabitha’s #LifeChosen mission is because one of my greatest fears has always been that there isn’t, and will never be, a plan and a purpose for my life. I easily believe this Biblical truth for others, but when it comes to my own life I’m suffocated in doubt. A lie is buried deep inside me that there’s an elusive ‘secret’ to unlocking God’s best for me, and unless I figure it out, I’m going to aimlessly waddle through the rest of my life—purposeless. I battle this fear sometimes on a daily basis.What fuels this lie is that I keep believing I’m just not . . . enough. I’m not smart enough, witty enough, perfect enough, engaging enough, pure enough, bold enough, or important enough for God to give me a purpose.Sometimes we can recognize lies for what they are—falsehoods—yet still struggle to combat them with the truth.The Bible is chock full of verses that dispute this lie. Not to mention stories of broken people who, through the Lord, accomplished amazing things. God doesn’t wait until people reach some sort of pinnacle of perfection, but works with them just as they are. With all their sins and ugliness hanging out for the world to see. And that means God can use us wherever we are.Our greatest purpose lies within—as Tabitha so beautifully penned—being daughters of Zion. In other words, my (and your) true purpose isn’t tied to titles such as author, doctor, teacher, astronaut or any of the other remarkable things you might do. Instead it is rooted in being God’s daughter (or son) and having a relationship with him.My main character, Audrey, is not me. Audrey is her own person—in her own fictional way, of course. She acts different, behaves different, interacts different and does a truckload of things I would never do (good and bad). But in this one area—the longing to have a purpose but fear that she’s not enough to deserve one—we are the same.Huntress—at its heart—is about a girl and her relationship with her God. And sometimes even about her lack of relationship with or understanding of God. Do you ever struggle with your relationship with God, or is it perfect all the time?On the surface Audrey’s problems are very different from yours. That is unless your job for eternity is to fight demons—the physical embodiment of evil—to protect unsuspecting people on Earth. If that’s true for you, call me! I’d love to pick a real demon hunter’s brain. ;-) But have you ever felt God’s asking you to do something for which you feel ill equipped? For you, it might be talking to a friend about the Lord. It might be loving someone who seems unlovable. It might even be cracking open the Bible and reading scripture. Those things can seem insurmountable.Perhaps you are one of the many who feel forgotten. You’re convinced God has left you adrift and unconcerned with your life . . . after all, things haven’t turned out the way you expected, bad things have happened, so how could God still have his loving eye on you? Audrey feels that way, and sometimes I do too.Whatever your demon, you are not alone in your doubts and fears. I’m not belittling what you are going through. It’s probably big, scary, and heartbreaking, but the great hope lies in the truth that we do have a loving God who cares for us, who has a plan and a purpose for our lives, even when we can’t see it. So when the fears and troubles role in—and they will because we live in a broken world—remember you always have someone to turn to for help and that there is a greater plan at work that is good.About the AuthorJulie Hall was a late blooming reader, but once captivated, writing became her dream.Going the practical route in college she earned a business degree from the University of Michigan. After school, she worked in marketing and publicity for both television and film, until she'd had enough of selling other people's creative expressions.She miraculously convinced her dashingly handsome husband that having ten years of experience mentoring youth, the idea of quitting her job to write a young-adult novel was the sensible thing to do.Since then she's become a puppy mama to a goldendoodle named Bear, and an actual mother to her adopted daughter.Connect with Julie:WebsiteGoodreadsFacebookTwitterInstagramAbout HuntressNo one’s afterlife is as dispiriting as Audrey’s―at least that’s what she believes after waking up dead without her memories and being promptly assigned to hunt demons for the rest of eternity. She’s convinced God’s made a cosmic mistake; after all, she’d rather discuss the color of her nails than break them on angelic weapons.It doesn’t help that her trainer, Logan, is as infuriating as he is attractive. And just when Audrey and Logan appear close to developing an amicable relationship, a decision made under duress pushes their hearts in a direction neither of them saw coming.Despite her sub-par fighting abilities, an ancient weapon of unparalleled power chooses Audrey as its wielder, attracting the cautious gazes of her fellow hunters and the attention of Satan himself. With Satan’s eyes now fixed on Audrey, a battle for the safety of the living looms in the shadows.Note: Julie Hall is rereleasing Huntress with a new cover on April 19th.Purchase Huntress:Amazon(pre-order)GoodreadsJulie has generously offered to give away four signed copies of Huntress and bookmarks as well as a grand prize pack that includes: one signed paperback of Huntress, bookmarks, $10 Amazon gift card, and $5 Starbucks gift card. Open to US only.CLICK HERE TO ENTER!

Why I Stopped Caring What My Daughter Wears

My eight year old's style could be described as Punky Brewster with a boho, rocker-chick vibe. (Go ahead, imagine it.) Let's just say her free-spirit shines through in what she wears. This hasn't always been something I embraced. We have had more than one argument about what she wanted to wear, there have been tears and yelling. I'm not proud of that but it's the truth.It doesn't help when in the midst of our wardrobe drama her younger sister (she's four) walks in to say, "I'll wear whatever you want mommy. I like what you picked out." (She's kind of a suck-up. LOL.) She just doesn't care like her older sister has always cared. To be fair she's the more compliant of the two and a bit of a people-pleaser. Not saying that's a totally good thing and we are working on it but as far as it concerns getting dressed in the mornings I'm cool with it. I can't do two crying girls. I just can't.I don'twantto have one crying girl,  not over clothes. Clothes just aren't that important. So I stopped caring. Mostly. We have three rules when it comes to what she chooses to wear.1. It has to be clean.2. It has to be weather appropriate.3. It has to be modest.Beyond that, I let her be her. I mean why did I really care to begin with? She asked me that once.We were trying to pick out clothes for school. I can't even remember the outfit now but knowing my daughter I am sure it involved clashing patterns. I know I said something like, "baby that doesn't match, I think it would look better if..."I may not remember exactly what I said but I remember her response because it cut me to the heart, "Mom, I don't care if people think it looks dumb, I like it. Why does it have to match anyway?"It was like Jesus was right there in that room going, "yeah, why?"Why did I care? If my little girl was happy then why was it worth this struggle to get her to change her mind? What difference did it make if she matched?I know what you're thinking...You are protecting her, other kids might make fun of her.My husband and I had even said those words to each other. It's how I justified it for so long. I thought I was doing it for her. But I wasn't. Images of friends' kids in their perfect Gap ad outfits were flashing through my mind. My own jealousy and insecurities were rearing their ugly little heads. I was thinking of what people would think ofme, how they would judgeme. I was putting the weight of my weakness on my little girl's shoulders and it wasn't right. (Was I also teaching her to prioritize image, what's on the outside more than the inside? Probably, but I didn't mean to.)You know what? There will always be a mean kid and that kid will find something to make fun of. There will be a day when my daughter comes home crying because someone said something that hurt her. But I refuse to be the one who breaks her spirit. I refuse to be the one planting those seeds of insecurity in her mind and heart. I refuse to be the one handing her the poison of a culture's standards that will destroy her self-worth. I refuse to be the one teaching her what she looks like is more important than who she is.God made my little girl. She is beautiful, smart, funny, creative, helpful, compassionate and a million other wonderful things that make my heart so proud to be her mama. She is also fierce and will one day face this world as a woman to be reckoned with, one full of boldness and strength and joy. When I see that image of her, who God created her to be I couldn't care less what she's wearing so I will choose to care less now.If she wants to go to Walmart in polka dot leggings and cowgirl boots with a safari hat I'm gonna let her. If she wants to go to school in ripped jeans and combat boots with a purple stripe in her hair I'm gonna let her. If she wants to head to church wearing three different patterns I'm gonna let her. I'm not just gonna let her, I'm gonna be proud to hold her hand and be her mama. (I'll probably be in combat boots myself anyway. She's teaching me some things.)

The Making of my Tacoladas

Okay, so #MySignatureDish was trending on twitter.  I obviously had to tweet one. If you follow me on twitter than you would not be surprised that tacos would be involved. But I also make a mean creamy enchilada verde, at least that’s what I call it. I have absolutely no latino DNA so I don’t pretend to know anything about latino cooking, dishes, recipes, anything. I just love tacos and enchiladas the way I make them.Disclaimer: I realized after this tweet that tacoladas are already a thing. I didn't know. No one told me. I'm a little upset that the world kept this secret from me. But I am in no way now taking credit for the tacolada, just sharing my own recipe. Continue with the reading of the blog. And hold on to your hats because recipes and DIY are not my thing so this should be interesting.Anyway, so I’m tweeting and I can’t decide, so the thought struck, what if I combine my creamy enchilada verdes and tacos into one dish…TACOLADAS!!! (Seriously, why did no one tell me this was a thing like when it became a thing? I feel betrayed. I'll forgive and move on though.)What I am about to share with you is my recipe for what will be now and forever, or until such a time as I no longer love tacos, (JK, like that could ever happen) my signature dish.Before we go any further I will point out that I know in the end this could just be seen as chicken tacos with a special sauce. I don’t care. Tacoladas is way more fun to say so don’t kill my dreams.Put chicken breast tenders, a can of red enchilada sauce and a block of cream cheese in a crock pot. (I’m cheap and easy and this is how I do it, if you are awesome and know how to make actual enchilada sauce from scratch knock yourself out. If you’re really inspired make your own cream cheese. You do you.)Cook it for about 4 hours. I use frozen chicken so I cook on high, if the chicken is thawed you can probably go lower. The point is to cook it until the chicken is no longer raw but I expect you don't need me to tell you that.Stir it all up. I use two forks tothen shred thechicken. If there is a more technical way to do this by all means be my guest. I just learned the right way to make mashed potatoes from an episode of master chef (Did you know it involves a ricer?) so I don’t pretend to have any real culinary abilities either..Let it cook another 15 minutes.Here comes the fun.5.  Lay out your tortillas. I use whole wheat ones but you get whatever kind you like. I won’t judge.6.  Spread a thin layer of salsa verde on the tortilla. Use whatever kind floats your boat. Hey, even make it from scratch…I don’t do that, but you go right ahead if you want to you little overachiever. (I’m not being sarcastic here, if you know how to make your own salsa anything I am genuinely impressed.)7. Put some of the chicken mixture on the tortilla. Be sure to include some sauce but not too much or things get messy. (You can always spoon a little leftover cream sauce on your tacolada before you eat it, or hey, dip it in it if you want. Be free!)8. Top with shredded cheese. I use fiesta blend. You can use plain cheddar or whatever. I’m flexible to your cheese preferences.9. Bake these in a 350 degree oven until the cheese is melted and gooey and bubbly and awesome.10. Top with sour cream, avocado, black beans, tomatoes, more cheese, more sauce, more salsa verde, whatever you like. I just go with black beans and avocado, but you don’t have to be like me.11. Eat and enjoy!So there you have it friends.MyTACOLADA!!PS: If you are wondering or like to be traditional and just want good ole enchiladas, spread the salsa verde in a  thin layer in the bottom of a casserole dish. Roll the chicken mixture in the tortillas and lay them in the dish. Drizzle more salsa verde on top, cover with cheese, bake at 350 until melty and gooey and bubbly and awesome. Serve the avocado and black beans on the side. That’s it. I have kids so quick and cheap and easy is what works for us. And whether it's enchilada or tacolada I hope you’ll like it.

The Social Media Monster

I have a love/hate relationship with social media. Given the title you might think that I think it’s all bad but I don’t. I don’t think social media is a bad thing. It’s just a thing, it’s not good or bad, how you use it determines that.Really there is a lot of good that comes through all the various available social platforms. It can be fun and easy to connect with old friends or family over a long distance. It can be useful for connecting with new people who you’d never get the chance to meet otherwise. (I’m talking to youLifeisaBookBlogandaliterarypotion. I’m still planning on us having tea together whenever I make it over the pond.)Meme wars entertain me immensely and those “My Heart Will Go On” videos are just...there are no words. (Insert your own string of crying, lol, crazy face, singing emojis here.)On a spiritual side there is also the ability to share encouraging verses, and sermon snippets as well as pray for people in need and bring awareness to various causes. (One near to my heart is theEnd It Movement.)But…you knew the but was coming…social media, this thing that has permeated our culture, can have a darker side.Yesterday I read this post fromCandace Cameron BureYou’re already tracking with me with thoughts about cyber bullying and general meanness. We all agree that bullying in any form, including cyber, is horrible and tragic. The problem is I think we don’t always realize when we are being the bullies.It’s so easy to post whatever we think about politics or a person and don’t think we are doing harm because we don’t see the hurt on their face. If we can state our opinion without using their name (or because we tell ourselves it’s a celebrity so we’re allowed to forget they are human) all the better because it’s like we aren’t talking about them at all, right? They can’t prove it so it’s not bullying. It kind of is. Even if I’m wrong on a technicality it still isn’t nice, it is a bit cowardly, and it certainly isn't Christ-like.We have a right to our thoughts and opinions but we have a mandate to share the love of Christ and speak truth in love. And by truth I mean the absolute truth of God’s Word which always trumps our personal truths (i.e. feelings, opinions and preferences.) God’s Word and His love should temper how we treat people in person and online.But I really didn’t want to talk about bullying, I got distracted for a second, sorry. I want to talk about manipulation. Maybe you’re not tracking with me as easily on this one but hear me out.  My hubby and I have been talking about how people use social media to manipulate for the past week or so. It’s something we see a lot, we probably even do it ourselves without realizing it all the time, and we think it’s dangerous.What am I talking about? I think there are a lot of times we use social media simply to get attention. Whether its negative or positive we get a boost with every like, comment, share, retweet and snap back. In fact it's kind of addictive to seek out that attention. An article inPsychology Todaytalks about this very thing. i won’t go into it but you can read about the dopamine trip social media can take us on.So, what, we’re back to social media being evil?Nope, and there is nothing wrong with needing a little encouragement from online friends, asking for prayer, or posting that selfie unless the motive is purely attention.I’m not a doctor so you can take this all as simply my warped opinion. I don’t have a study to back this up but it’s quite possible someone out there has done one. Feel free to google. Feel free to disagree with me. It’s cool, we can still be friends. Whether I have the science to back me up or not I do have a little experience. Not only do I struggle with this dynamic in my own mind but as a student pastor, my husband and I see this play out in teenagers all the time. (And adults, so don’t think age always means wisdom.) We get caught up in a need, we post something in order to provide for that need.What’s the big deal?If it’s for attention, to boost your self-confidence, it will ultimately backfire. The first time no one likes the post, or no one reaches out to comfort/encourage you, the first time no one responds we feel our self-worth diminish. We tell ourselves no one cares about us, no one likes us, they all think we are ugly. It never occurs to us that algorithms just keep us from showing up in their feed or they were offline or their phone died, or they were actually talking to another real life person in person and couldn’t stop to look at Instagram.Using your emotional state, be it happy or sad, to manipulate people in order to get that little boost of attention may make you feel good in the moment but it isn’t dealing with the underlying insecurities and usually makes them worse. If you are thinking there will always be someone that responds, maybe you’re right, but then one like or comment or retweet won’t be enough, we will need more.We are seeking but never satisfied.So what do we do? Do we just give up on social media completely?I don’t think you have to do that. I think sometimes a fast or break from social media can be a good thing. Taking a day, week or month and setting it aside to focus on personal connections might be healthy and help you break a negative cycle you might have found yourself in.But remember, social media isn’t bad, it’s all in how you use it, in the boundaries you set for yourself. So when you are online THINK before you post, tweet, or snap. Ask yourself why you want to share that thought, photo or need.Is that selfie just to get someone to tell you that you look pretty or because you already genuinely felt good about yourself whether anyone else likes it or not?Is that rant or complaint because you just want sympathy, to invite more guests to your pity party so you can feel like you aren’t alone or do you genuinely want truthful encouragement and counsel? Maybe it’d be better to take a minute with Jesus instead of trying to get pity or validation from others. (Ouch, that one hurt me a little bit too.)Let’s get in the habit of checking our motives. Do we want prayer or pity? Is that opinion I’m about to share truly helpful and out of a servant’s heart? Most importantly, am I pointing people to Jesus? Am I making Him attractive?Fervrposted another great article you should read with more on that.Whether we are online or in real life we are to be like Christ, we are pointing people to Jesus. Be it a selfie or meme share or political rant, etc. are we making Jesus happy, because He sees you and your motives and your feed/timeline/story. In the end all the validation and self-confidence you need can really only be found in Him anyway, but He doesn’t tweet it.SaveSaveSave

The Marked

I'm so excited to welcome Emerald Barnes back to my blog.Thanks, Tab, for having me on the blog again! I always love being here. I love what you do with your books and blog, because of how much you love helping others.So, that brings me to this. When Tabitha asked me if I could tie in my new novel, The Marked, with her #LiveChosen movement, I told her I could come up with something. Honestly, that was more difficult than I anticipated. My new novel is about vampires and werewolves, how could I tie in a non-Christian YA book with something that was so easy to do with my Entertaining Angels series? It wasn’t easy, but being the author I am—I realized that my novel goes a little deeper than I originally anticipated.Myka, my main character, struggles with her identity throughout The Marked. She’s adopted, and when she found out that she was, she completely lost who she was. She never felt like she belonged anywhere, so that’s why she chose to leave her family and what was familiar behind and move to a new place. There, she thought she could discover who she really was. It was a way of starting over for her. If you’ve read (or will read) the book, you’ll know that wasn’t easy for her, until the end, until she knew her back story and what lay ahead for her.We’ve all felt a lot like her. I personally have. For years, I struggled with who I was, what I was supposed to do with my life, and what my purpose on this planet was. Why had God given me the gift of writing if no one bought my books? Why had God given me a passion to teach teens about Him and His love for them if I wasn’t being used as a youth leader?Like Myka, I was searching for my identity and my purpose. And I searched for years. Until I quit searching. I didn’t give up, but I said, “Okay, God. You know what has been prophesied over me. You know what gifts You have given me. Whatever You want me to do. Whatever You need me to do, just let me know.” And I let it go. I stopped searching and waited.Waiting isn’t easy, but it paid off. God gave me a youth leader position at the end of last year, and He’s even using my non-Christian books in ways that I couldn’t have expected. Like this post for instance. I had no clue that my novel was so deep, but it can be seen that way.When you feel like you don’t have an identity, just let life happen. Wait on God to show you what you need to do, and God won’t identify everything at once to you. You’d get so overwhelmed! (I think Andrew Wommack is the one who said that.) He’s going to reveal it to you as you go along. Life is about living one day at a time. Whether you’re facing a horde of vampires or if you’re just facing a torrent of thoughts that like to bring you down, you’re going to be okay. You’re identity doesn’t come from you. It comes from God. It comes from knowing who you are in God.That’s why I like to focus on that in my books. If you’ve read Entertaining Angels, you’ll know that in my series, that’s what I focus on. I focus on teaching young women that their identities don’t come from the mirror or the scars on their wrists. Your identity comes when you truly learn who you are to God and who you are in God.You’re loved. You’ve always been loved. You’re created in the image of God, and He is the One who saw fit that the world needed you. Don’t let the world bring you down. Don’t let the enemy make you feel like you’re worthless and don’t belong. You’re where you are for a reason. There’s even a reason for your waiting period. Just give it to God and remember that you have been chosen for such a time as this. It’s time to #LiveChosen because you have been chosen.Watch the Book TrailerThe official Knight’s Academy Playlist  Buy The MarkedAdd The Marked to GoodreadsMyka Williams has never fit in with her peers, and although her adoptive parents are loving and supportive, she feels most at home alone in the woods.When she's offered a full scholarship to Knight's Academy in the Smoky Mountains of Tennessee, she takes the opportunity for a fresh start. She soon learns that Knight’s Academy is more than just a school. Within the stone walls of the institution, humans and vampires are mixing, and their offspring are going unnoticed.As Myka falls prey to the evil plan of the school, she makes a chilling discovery about her own heritage and realizes that she’s at the Academy for more than just an education. Myka must yield to her birthright at the risk of losing everyone she loves or succumb to the fate that Knight’s Academy has in store for her—a fate worse than death.Emerald Barnes resides in a small town in Mississippi and has the accent to prove it. She’s an auntie, a youth leader, a Whovian, a little bit of a nerd, a reader, a writer, and a family-oriented person. God is number One in her life, and she thanks Him continuously for His love and favor. She’s addicted to tv and binge-watching shows, and she has a thing for superheroes.Connect with Emerald:WebsiteBlogPinterestFacebookTwitterStreet TeamInstagramGoodreads

My 2017 Word of the Year

"If we consider the unblushing promises of reward … promised in the Gospels, it would seem that our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at sea. We are far too easily pleased.”- C.S. Lewis2016 was my 'year on purpose'. I wanted to live more intentionally. That isn't changing in 2017. In fact, striving to live each day on purpose for a purpose has changed the way I view my time management and decision making. I'm not perfect at it by any means, but I have found myself counting the cost more. I don't want to just skate by or have panicked prayers that things work out. I want to walk as one who is CHOSEN.That mentality in 2016 also birthed #LiveChosen, which is my little initiative to help young women do the same. God created us for a purpose and we should live like it. We are powerful, chosen, loved and never alone.But now for this year. A word of the year thing has never been my thing. last year was a first for me and I hadn't really expected to have a new word for this year. But then I was readingWithout Rivalby Lisa Bevere and this C.S. Lewis quote popped up and God interrupted to speak to my soul."2017 will be a year of promise."That sounds cool doesn't it? But it was more than just a year of promises, or even promise fulfilled. For me, there is a specific promise attached to God's whisper. I know you want to know what it is but I'm not going to tell you. Sorry. This is something God showed me a long time ago, something I had started to lose sight of and hope for and you don't need to know what it is to know that I believe 2017 is going to be the year where the seeds that were planted in my life more than a decade ago begin to sprout and bear fruit. A year where the vision God once gave me takes root in reality."I will not violate My covenant, nor will I alter even one word of what My lips have spoken." Psalm 89:34 (the Voice)I have to admit I had given up. I hate to say that. I would like to view myself as full of unwavering faith, but years are long and I doubted that what I had once heard was even really God. But in that moment, when He spoke that word PROMISE, I just knew exactly which promise He was talking about.The details may be a bit different than I had once dreamed, but it is the same covenant I once felt God's heart making with my own."Now the Lord is not slow about enacting His promise—slow is how some people want to characterize it—no, He is not slow but patient and merciful to you, not wanting anyone to be destroyed, but wanting everyone to turn away from following his own path and to turn toward God’s." 2 Peter 3:9 (the Voice)I may have given up, or thought I had missed it, or worried I was never going to be good enough but God had not.Don't get me wrong, I have growing and learning to do, I have most certainly not arrived nor will I ever, but God's promise was never about me being good enough, it was just about being ready, being rooted in Him and prepared to stand no matter what may come.I don't think 2017 will be easy. In fact, I am thinking it will be just the opposite. I find myself already rolling up my sleeves to work even harder. I am prayerfully strategizing my days, weeks, and months. I am diving deeper into God and His word, preparing myself for battle."Along the way we picked up the lie that we could be heroes without ever engaging in a battle." - Lisa Bevere, Without RivalI'm not looking for a fight, but I know that there is an enemy who wants me to fail, who doesn't want me to see victory, who doesn't want my promise fulfilled and he will come at me. Even now the Destroyer is plotting his attacks. This girl's sword is ready. (Claire and Zoe would be super proud.)So, here I am walking into my year of promise and I am praying for you too. God has given you promises in His word. He has whispered things to your heart. Maybe it was a decade ago or just yesterday. He always keeps His promises. Let's keep each other encouraged this year. Let's fight together as daughters of Zion. Let's carry our swords (or crossbows, or consecrated butter knives if you're more of a Maggie) and walk victoriously into all God has for us.