Sign in with Facebook
For the first time in a long time, I fell asleep believing that maybe, just maybe, I was capable of something better. Because of her.
“Um, and this is….Ilya. Rozanov. You probably know that.”
“Hi,” Ilya said.
“And he’s been…visiting. He’s…we’re, um…”
What were they, exactly? It occurred to Shane that he and Ilya hadn’t even figured out what label they were comfortable with.
“Lovers,” Ilya offered.
Fuck, way to choose the grossest possible word, Ilya.
Well, there was no going back from that word. Shane could only wait for the aftermath.
“But…you hate him,” Mom said.
“No, I…don’t. I mean. Sometimes I do, kinda. But mostly I..love him. Actually.”
“You..what?”
― Heated Rivalry
“Hi,” Ilya said.
“And he’s been…visiting. He’s…we’re, um…”
What were they, exactly? It occurred to Shane that he and Ilya hadn’t even figured out what label they were comfortable with.
“Lovers,” Ilya offered.
Fuck, way to choose the grossest possible word, Ilya.
Well, there was no going back from that word. Shane could only wait for the aftermath.
“But…you hate him,” Mom said.
“No, I…don’t. I mean. Sometimes I do, kinda. But mostly I..love him. Actually.”
“You..what?”
― Heated Rivalry
“Ilya was wearing a Boston Bears shirt.
"That's not going to help."
"Oh, do they not know I play for Boston?”
― Heated Rivalry
"That's not going to help."
"Oh, do they not know I play for Boston?”
― Heated Rivalry
“You aren’t afraid?” James asks. “No. We are all placed here for a certain time. There’s no use in fighting for a different outcome.”
― Daughter of the King
― Daughter of the King
“There was something a little creepy about sitting in this small pool of light in the middle of total darkness. It was so eerily quiet - just the crackling of the fire, the occasional lap of water from the lake, and -
A fucking wolf. That was a fucking wolf howl.
"What the fuck was that?" Ilya said. He couldn't conceal the terror in his voice. But who the fuck cared, because they were surrounded by hungry wolves!
Shane laughed. "It's a loon."
"A what?"
"A loon!" Shane was really laughing now. "It's a bird. Like a duck, kind of. Oh my god, you thought it was a wolf!"
"What the fuck bird makes a noise like that?"
"A loon!" Shane said again. Then he doubled over in hysterics. Ilya wanted to push him into the fire.
"Fuck you and your loon!" Ilya said. "Stupid Canadian wolf bird.”
― Heated Rivalry
A fucking wolf. That was a fucking wolf howl.
"What the fuck was that?" Ilya said. He couldn't conceal the terror in his voice. But who the fuck cared, because they were surrounded by hungry wolves!
Shane laughed. "It's a loon."
"A what?"
"A loon!" Shane was really laughing now. "It's a bird. Like a duck, kind of. Oh my god, you thought it was a wolf!"
"What the fuck bird makes a noise like that?"
"A loon!" Shane said again. Then he doubled over in hysterics. Ilya wanted to push him into the fire.
"Fuck you and your loon!" Ilya said. "Stupid Canadian wolf bird.”
― Heated Rivalry
“But,” Shane said. He had to say this next part. It had been eating away at him for too long. “You want to get married, right? To a woman, I mean. You’re not...like me. You like women. And I’m sure...Svetlana is gorgeous and fun and...all that stuff. Right?”
“Yes,” Ilya said. “I do. She is. But.”
“But?”
Ilya shrugged, and he looked like he was possibly blushing. “I have this problem,” he mumbled.
Shane waited.
“I like women. I always was thinking that to get married would be nice. Kids. All of that. Someday. But...this problem will not go away.”
Shane bit his lip. “Tell me about this problem.”
“Is so annoying.” Ilya sighed, and Shane could see him fighting a grin. “Always I am with beautiful women. Wonderful women. Everywhere.”
“Sounds rough.”
“Yes. Listen. These women, they are so sexy and fun, but is no matter. I cannot stop thinking about this short fucking hockey player with these stupid freckles and a weak backhand.”
“A weak backhand?” Shane couldn’t stop smiling.
“Yes. And he is just so boring and he drives a terrible car and...that is my problem. All of these beautiful women and I am always wishing they were him.”
Ilya bent to take his third shot. “Is terrible problem.”
Fuck. Shane was going start crying right here in his games room. He swallowed and steadied himself. “Do you want the problem to go away?”
“No,” Ilya said seriously, looking Shane dead in the eye. “I do not want the problem to ever go away.”
― Heated Rivalry
“Yes,” Ilya said. “I do. She is. But.”
“But?”
Ilya shrugged, and he looked like he was possibly blushing. “I have this problem,” he mumbled.
Shane waited.
“I like women. I always was thinking that to get married would be nice. Kids. All of that. Someday. But...this problem will not go away.”
Shane bit his lip. “Tell me about this problem.”
“Is so annoying.” Ilya sighed, and Shane could see him fighting a grin. “Always I am with beautiful women. Wonderful women. Everywhere.”
“Sounds rough.”
“Yes. Listen. These women, they are so sexy and fun, but is no matter. I cannot stop thinking about this short fucking hockey player with these stupid freckles and a weak backhand.”
“A weak backhand?” Shane couldn’t stop smiling.
“Yes. And he is just so boring and he drives a terrible car and...that is my problem. All of these beautiful women and I am always wishing they were him.”
Ilya bent to take his third shot. “Is terrible problem.”
Fuck. Shane was going start crying right here in his games room. He swallowed and steadied himself. “Do you want the problem to go away?”
“No,” Ilya said seriously, looking Shane dead in the eye. “I do not want the problem to ever go away.”
― Heated Rivalry
Booktok 📚
— 225644 members
— last activity 1 hour, 14 min ago
A place for booktokers to interact with each other and share the love
Alana’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Alana’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
821 books
|
107 friends
802 books
|
1,187 friends
958 books
|
36 friends
390 books
|
35 friends
560 books
|
367 friends
2,645 books
|
10 friends
5,470 books
|
361 friends
250 books
|
46 friends
More friends…
Favorite Genres
Polls voted on by Alana
Lists liked by Alana
