Rose

“his kindness like bathwater, lapping my shoulders, milky and warm.”
― Kate Elizabeth Russell, My Dark Vanessa

“He’s the only person who ever understood that desire. Not to die, but to already be dead.”
― Kate Elizabeth Russell, My Dark Vanessa

“There are men who never turn into boyfriends, who peer behind the curtain and see the mess of me—literal and figurative: the apartment with a narrow path through the clothes and trash leading from bed to bathroom; the drinking, endless drinking; the blackout sex and nightmares. “You’re kind of screwed up,” they say, at first with a laugh in their voice, an attitude of maybe this will be fun for a while, but as soon as I slur out the story—teacher, sex, fifteen, but I liked it, I miss it—they’re done. “You’ve got serious issues,” they say on their way out the door.”
― Kate Elizabeth Russell, My Dark Vanessa

“I was an obvious target. He chose me not because I was special, but because he was hungry and I was easy. Back at my apartment, while the man and I have sex, I leave myself in a way I haven’t in years. He and my body are in the bedroom as my mind wanders the apartment, curls up on the couch, and stares at the blank TV.”
― Kate Elizabeth Russell, My Dark Vanessa