Melissa

“I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.”
― Bill Cosby

“Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip”
― Erma Bombeck

“Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.”
― Erma Bombeck

“In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet.”
― Erma Bombeck