Jessica Rydill

“In fact, the mere act of opening the box will determine the state of the
cat, although in this case there were three determinate states the cat
could be in: these being Alive, Dead, and Bloody Furious.”
― Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

“Nanny Ogg knew how to start spelling 'banana', but didn't know how you stopped.”
― Terry Pratchett, Witches Abroad

“Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles!”
― Hergé

“She cleared her throat once or twice, and said something about poor people should eat a lot of herrings, as they were most nutritious, also she had heard poor people eat heaps of sheeps' heads and she went on to ask if I ever cooked them. I said I would rather be dead than cook or eat a sheep's head; I'd seen them in butchers' shops with awful eyes and bits of wool sticking to their skulls. After that helpful hints for the poor were forgotten.”
― Barbara Comyns, Our Spoons Came from Woolworths