Philip Whiteland - the man behind Josiah and Archibald (which makes it sound like we're in a queue!) Showing 1,801-1,850 of 3,307

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Well next time I get a cold I'll have a gravelly voice for a while.

[Philip]

The second part of the 'what to get your bloke for Christmas' thing:

http://www.philwhiteland.blogspot.co....

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

I would prefer an article on How to get a Bloke for Christmas, but I'll just have to work with what i got I suppose.

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Dark and Mysterious Stranger wrote: "I would prefer an article on How to get a Bloke for Christmas, but I'll just have to work with what i got I suppose."

You would be better off with a turkey!

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

It doesn't go down too well if you walk into a christmas party with a turkey on your arm.

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Dark and Mysterious Stranger wrote: "It doesn't go down too well if you walk into a christmas party with a turkey on your arm."

Oh, I don't know so much. It rather depends on whether they've remembered to go to the butcher's or not. There was a great article by Clement Freud years ago in which he said he kept being asked if he would be having a turkey for Christmas - he said that he wouldn't as one turkey tended to be lonely but two tended to fight. He then proceeded in more of the same vein.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

I get invited to christmas parties that consist of standing around in nightclubs all night with earsplitting 'music' and ultra-high calorie 'finger food' . I'm too old for that...

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Dark and Mysterious Stranger wrote: "I get invited to christmas parties that consist of standing around in nightclubs all night with earsplitting 'music' and ultra-high calorie 'finger food' . I'm too old for that..."

I don't get invited to Christmas parties.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

That might not be such a bad thing.

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Dark and Mysterious Stranger wrote: "That might not be such a bad thing."

Absolutely! I wasn't complaining, just making an observation :-)

[Philip]

Philip wrote: "The second part of the 'what to get your bloke for Christmas' thing:

http://www.philwhiteland.blogspot.co...."

Every man, secretly, wants a high-vis vest

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

As long as its not a string vest.

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Dark and Mysterious Stranger wrote: "As long as its not a string vest."

Oh yes, a high-vis string vest, now you're talking!

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

It would clash with the lobster-red of the sunburn.

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Dark and Mysterious Stranger wrote: "It would clash with the lobster-red of the sunburn."

Things don't clash when you're wearing high-vis - they just get out of the way.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Hmmm, trying to think how that would work...

[Philip]

Tomorrow, for one day only, my irredeemably silly book, will be FREE! Give yourself a giggle for Christmas, you deserve it ;-)

[Philip]

I've posted one of my 'alternative Nativity' stories on Wattpad to try to help us get into the festive spirit:

http://www.wattpad.com/31747474-the-n...

[Philip]

Philip wrote: "I've posted one of my 'alternative Nativity' stories on Wattpad to try to help us get into the festive spirit:

http://www.wattpad.com/31747474-the-n..."

Actually, I quite like the idea of an 'AlterNativity' to go with my 'nostalgedy' collection :-)

[Philip]

Starting tomorrow and going on for three days, I'm having a bash at one of these Kindle Countdown thingies for . Price will be reduced from £1.99 to £0.99 for the duration. I'll let you know how it works out :-)

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Hello from Derby Phil!

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Smiter of idiots. wrote: "Hello from Derby Phil!"

Hi GL. Hope you enjoy it. When I was there a couple of Saturdays ago it was like Dante's Inferno. I've been sampling the delights of Leamington Spa yesterday and Cheshire today :-)

BTW, the Countdown thingy isn't working out at all :-(

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Well a couple of hours in the Westfield Centre was enough for me. The zombie apocalypse seems to have happened there already. Apparently the locals call it the Westlife Centre. And not as a compliment.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

I am now with my parents in Milton Keynes, which probably isn't much better, but we are well away from the shopping areas.

[Philip]

Gingerlily - Smiter of idiots. wrote: "I am now with my parents in Milton Keynes, which probably isn't much better, but we are well away from the shopping areas."

You're not responsible for this, by any chance?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-...

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

I am not allowed to comment.

[Philip]

Philip wrote: "Starting tomorrow and going on for three days, I'm having a bash at one of these Kindle Countdown thingies for . Price will be reduced from £1.99 to £..."

Well, the feedback from the Kindle Countdown experiment is that it didn't work at all. Even with loads of promotion in every crook and nanny I could think of, I still finished up with nada, zilch, not a sausage. I would be interested to know if anyone else has had a similar experience, or is it just me?

[Setlu]

Philip wrote: "Philip wrote: "Starting tomorrow and going on for three days, I'm having a bash at one of these Kindle Countdown thingies for . Price will be reduced ..."

Hi Phil, I'm only new here. Sorry to hear that the promotion was a failure. I have been trying to decide whether to do the countdown or the free offer. I guess you might have helped me decide. Hopefully, things will pick up when people get eReaders for Christmas... it's a hope... and one that I am 'hoping' on.

[Philip]

Setlu wrote: "Philip wrote: "Philip wrote: "Starting tomorrow and going on for three days, I'm having a bash at one of these Kindle Countdown thingies for . Price w..."

From experience, there usually is a bit of a post-Christmas bounce, although it was most marked a couple of years ago when e-readers were the sought after thing. I guess the answer is to aim at those who are getting Tablets for Christmas and to promote the fact that they can download a free Kindle app.

[Philip]

Fancy a giggle over Christmas? The absolute silliness that is Jambalaya will be FREE again for one day only on the Eve of Christmas Eve (23rd December for anyone struggling) Treat yourself to some festive fun. http://getbook.at/jambalaya

[Philip]

A new 4 star review for

http://www.amazon.co.uk/review/R2WQ7Y...

http://getbook.at/AKickatthePantryDoor

[Jan]

Congrats on the 4 star.

This promotion thingy is getting more and more difficult. Having to spend an entire morning trying to give a book away for FREE is exhausting. It wasn't like this in the good old days of 2011 (sigh)

[Philip]

Thanks Jan. Happy New Year to you!

I know what you mean re promotion. I tried out one of those Kindle Countdown deals (on this particular book as a matter of fact) and achieved no sales at all over four days of it. I don't know whether it's that there are too many books chasing too few readers or what but something's got to change.

[Jan]

I'm wondering if it's all the new Amazon stores. The reviews aren't posted in the new stores, so that must have some affect. I haven't done an author profile for the new stores either - have you?

[Philip]

Good point Jan. I hadn't thought of that. Mind you, most of my sales were in the UK, and that's just as bad. No, I haven't done anything with the new stores as yet.

[Philip]

For one day only, on Tuesday, 14th January, will be offered FREE! This is the first time that any of the 'nostalgedy' collection of books has been part of a Free promotion (and probably the last, as well)

http://getbook.at/crutchesforducks

[Jan]

Good luck with your freebie. Let us know what happens. I've just done one on my children's book for left-handers. A lot of work and only got about 200 downloads and two sales, but it is a niche market.

[Philip]

Jan wrote: "Good luck with your freebie. Let us know what happens. I've just done one on my children's book for left-handers. A lot of work and only got about 200 downloads and two sales, but it is a niche mar..."

That sounds like quite a good outcome in the present market, Jan :-) Hope it leads to wider exposure, it's a very worthwhile cause.

[Philip]

I'm at No.1 somewhere!

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Best-Sellers-...

[Jan]

Congrats. Make sure you take a shot of it!

[Philip]

Jan wrote: "Congrats. Make sure you take a shot of it!"

Thanks Jan. Not a fiercely contested category, but it's nice in it's way. CFD is doing quite well as a FREEBIE today :-)

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

yay

[Philip]

Also, No. 5, just ahead of Mike Yarwood (and this is me!)

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Best-Sellers-...

plus, at No. 557 in overall list. If these were bought purchases, I would be retiring by now ;-)

[Jan]

I made it to No 1 in the free list in several countries for: Children's - parent participation, when The Race was free - and that was when it had only four downloads ha ha.

[Philip]

Well, that was fun while it lasted! Had over 350 downloads worldwide ;-) Made it to No. 297 in overall UK chart and No. 1568 in USA. Now to see whether it makes any difference in the long term.

[Jan]

That was a good run. Let's hope you have a few sales and reviews.

[Philip]

Jan wrote: "That was a good run. Let's hope you have a few sales and reviews."

Well, I've had one brilliant review plus a couple of sales, so fingers crossed (if nothing else!)

[Philip]

Perhaps I should come with a Govt. Health Warning! ;-)

http://www.amazon.co.uk/review/R13WZT...

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Your invisibility cloak isn't working properly!

[Jan]

Congrats!