it's personal discussion
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trying to feel like me again
Valentine Ransom (call me Val) ~Phantom of the Library~ wrote: "Oh, lol"Haha yeah. I'm seriously a terrible person.
I was gonna rant but now I don't feel like it lol
I guess I just get tired of feeling angry at the world XD
Lillian wrote: "No, you're not. I feel that way every day."Me too :/ The longer I live, the angrier I get it seems
❄️Ƙανу тнє ναмριяє❄️ (Ɓνвαяму) (Aelonian) (AA family) wrote: "You're never alone *hugs*"That's a lie, but thanks anyways *hugs back*
To an old friend:I need to tell you I'm sorry. I lied to you so much. I told you it'd get better. I told you you'd find a reason to live. I told you I would never leave you. I told you you'd always have me to talk to. I made empty promises and told lies and truths I only thought would make you feel better. Maybe that did. But for how long? Ten seconds before your brain tells you that's a lie before you can even have a chance of believing before you can feel yourself slipping up before you can just imagine the world in the palm of your hands, burning. Just enough time to let you let lose with a fake smile. I acted as if your feelings didn't matter. You'd get better. You'd get over this illness, this sickness. I told you all of that. I lied. I'm so sorry. Every time we talk now we don't know what to say and we both apologize for all the wrong things. I haven't talked to you in months. Gods, I miss you and I don't know how to tell you all this without freaking you about. I still owe you a song. I swear it's coming.
I think this every day but I always try to push it away
But what if? And maybe I won't ever know the answer?
I'll finish her song well first I got to start it and I'll message her this weekend.
And it sucks not knowing if other friends are dead because you can't talk to them or they won't talk to you.
Oh Gods, I can already feel my anxiety kicking in.
Valentine Ransom (call me Val) ~Phantom of the Library~ wrote: "Hope you have a good day! :)"Thanks, it was a pretty good day. ^_^
❄️Ƙανу тнє ναмριяє❄️ (Ɓνвαяму) (Aelonian) (AA family) wrote: "I'm sorry Erin :("You're fine! It's not your fault :)
Yep :) This day felt like it took forever so I'm glad
That's the truth! :D We must conquer until....idk the end of our time or something XD
I'm probably going to disappear for awhile I'll be back around six or seven.
They're yelling rn so I'm trying to focus on something more positive and math isn't that.
He threatened to bust my mom's skull open this morning.
It was actually a pretty okay day before this.
Challenger Deep has arrived at the library but I don't want to ask Matt to drive me so I can pick it up. I'll probably end up walking. Actually probably not since my mom can't even fucking allow me to do that.
Brings a shithole into the house who can drive and now I don't have an excuse to walk.
I was allowing my hands and arm and fingers to go numb. Maybe I hadn't even started trying that day, maybe I wanted to throw everything a way.
What is a happy family? What is a healthy family? I don't have either.
I don't want my life to be just another sad story
But I don't know how long I'll take this.
Allison shouldn't feel guilty. She should leave as soon as she can. I would never be angry at her for it. I mean, I really have no room to talk anyways.
it's personal
Books mentioned in this topic
30 Things I Love About Myself (other topics)Challenger Deep (other topics)
Throes (other topics)
P.S. I Still Love You (other topics)
Delirium (other topics)
Me too. I was just asking another question. I thought we were doing the five W's