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My mother learned to paint in her later days. Some of the paintings are really good, some of the early ones, as she liked to say, more like Grandma Moses' paintings (primitives of a particular kind, full of the detail of daily life).
It breaks my heart that I have them - and not her.
Take picture. Lots of pictures. They will be there to evoke everything you remember, even without the things themselves. You will do what you can and wish to do - none of us can absorb another's whole life because we already have our own.
And I suspect you'd absorb BOTH your parents' whole lives if you could - and they'd be appalled at how you had weighed yourself down!
Too bad you can't donate a working piano to someone in their village.
I doubt it will help right now, but parents worldwide are complaining the offspring don't want their family stuff. Modern life doesn't have room. We donated a lot - because other people could use it - but didn't have the years of history you are having to let go of. And placing some of those things in the perfect homes would consume, easily, the next year of your life.
I feel WITH you - and can't do a thing to help except understand.

My mother learned to paint in her later days. Some of the paintings are really good, some of the early ones, as she liked to say, more like Grandma Moses' paintings (primitives..."
Bless your heart. Trust me, that you understand helps a lot on its own. 🙂

I'm so sorry you had to do so much of it by yourself, even with your brother's help and support. It was a LOT. And you're not finished quite yet.
We moved to a CCRC (continuing care retirement community - includes higher levels of care on the premises) so our wide-spread kids wouldn't have to do a lot of those chores, but it's not perfect. I am still grateful, though, that when the AC had problems this past summer, and we had mice recently, and the toilet needed replacement, and the refrigerator decided to stop cooling, all we had to do was email Facilities, and things were eventually back to normal.
Especially helpful was the replacement refrigerator while our was being repaired! Brought up and installed from the basement on a Sunday afternoon by the staff member on duty! Whew.
The problem here and many places is that we are both almost the same age, so not necessarily great when one of us needs a lot of support. At which point in the future, Zoom and the offspring will have to weigh in.
Hang in there - and keep writing about it.

Sorry this happened to you - what a waste.

Then I also thought, hmmm, you may like Richard Bintanja's writings. He's a meteorologist. IMAU Utrecht has been up to its ears in computer modelling of ocean currents and climate for a long time. That's where he was initially and spent many years; he later moved on. I know and knew a few physicists and other scientists, but none of the others are writing fiction, as far as I am aware. One was a pretty good modern dancer (progressive MS claimed her) and I also know quite a few scientists who play music but the only one I know who writes fiction is Richard.
I translated one of his novels and was amazed by the intricate plot he had created and by how it ties in to diversity and equality. (It's a little Gattaca-like.) He's more recently written a novel featuring scientists in Antarctica as well but I don't think that the other ones have any ties to science. It's all in Dutch. His Dutch books have sold quite a bit and he used to give informal lectures (probably still does), which helped, but it's hard to market for the English language because the market is so huge. I doubt that he spends any time on it.
I've never done much marketing for myself. I think I did some Amazon ads for my flash fiction years ago, but it's pretty specific, not most people's cup of tea. I had a ball writing it!
I started writing a combination of three novels later, about three women, set in various locations across the globe, who all run into some difficulties (and then come to each other's rescue as they are old friends), but I didn't have the opportunity to buckle down for them. I don't know if I will still finish them, but I doubt it because I am in a very different frame of mind these days.

Then I also thought, hmmm, you may like Richard Bintan..."
Yes, in principle. Unfortunately, ME/CFS has left me so little energy that I don't do the fun reading in all directions I used to do; I have to save it for writing Pride's Children: LIMBO, or nothing gets done.
The world is full of fascinating things and people.


Then I also thought, hmmm, you may like Richard Bintan..."
I loved your post I was going to reply but I was riding the vomit comit all week. Rest assured it's not going to landfill. We'll sort something and open house is one of the things on the table. And hello and welcome.

I really hope so. It's time they started taking this stuff seriously.

https://mtmcguire.co.uk/2025/03/09/pl...
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Without THEM, it's all just stuff. Few o..."
That is true. Sadly, it's very out of vogue. None of it's worth anything. The Georgian sideboard Mum and Dad bought for £900 in the 80s is worth £50 at best. The auctioneer said there was no point his taking it. The piano, made by a really old and respected maker ... not worth taking even by the house clearance guy. At best I can hope it will be broken up and the wood used again. At worst it will go to the dump, when it's a perfectly functioning instrument, which is really sad. It is just stuff, but it's things they cared for and loved. It all has to go. It's just that ... I can explain it better with the plants.
In Mum's garden she had loads of plants she'd got from various places. Each one was a souvenir. They all had names. One was from some flower arranging classes Mum went to when I was a toddler (cut flowers included so Mum rooted one and planted it). Cuttings taken from friends gardens, which were all named after them. Plants given by friends or bought with tokens given by friends. I remember Dad asking her to cut a bush back and she said she couldn't because it was Betty (the friend whose garden it had come from, who had since died).
That's the thing Mum and Dad's garden wasn't full of plants. It was full of days out and people and memories.
I have to leave them, although I will be taking some cuttings of my own. The furniture is the same, 'That's grannies funnies cabinet. Darling I have a wonderful story about that ... ' everything has a story and a history. Everything is an event a person, a funny anecdote ... I think that's why it's hard. Each one has been loved and owned and used by members of my family for as much as 300 years in some instances. These things have made it down 3-5 generations of family line and I am the place where it stops.
It feels ... it feels like shutting down a museum and not just breaking up the collection but throwing most of it onto the tip. Lose the furniture and I will lose the stories ... but then they will be lost anyway, because none of the nippers is interested.
When my brother and I have been through it all and taken away what we want, I intend to send a note to Mum and Dad's friends from the village and just tell them that I will be there on a certain day and that if they want to come and take something away to remind them of Mum and Dad, they are welcome to do so. There is such a tapestry of stories and history in all these things that I feel as if I'm burning an ancient book. It has to be done, but it would be much easier if I thought these things would be bought by new owners who would enjoy them, and use them and see the same beauty in them as my parents did ... But 300 years old or not, most of them will be going to landfill. And they're beautiful, so to me that's only a vew stops short of vandalism.
Does that make sense?