Bruno > Bruno's Quotes

“It is my time. The time of maximum ride...”
― James Patterson, Nevermore

“Basically, I have two speeds.... Hostile or smart-aleck. Your choice.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“Did you know that wasn’t me, the other Max?” I asked.
“Yeah.”
“When?”
“Right away.”
“How?” I persisted. “We look identical. She even had identical scars and scratches. She was wearing my clothes. How could you tell us apart?”
He turned to me and grinned, making my world brighter. “She offered to cook breakfast.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Vhat ozzer abilities do you haf?" ter Borcht snapped, which his assistant waited, pen in hand.
Gazzy thought. "I have X-ray vision," he said. He peered at ter Borcht's chest, then blinked and looked alarmed.
Ter Borcht was startled for a second, but then he frowned. "Don't write dat down," he told his assistant in irritation. The assistant froze in midsentence.
"You. Do you haf any qualities dat distinguish you in any way?"
Nudge chewed on a fingernail. "You mean, like, besides the WINGS?" She shook her shoulders gently, and her beautiful fawn-colored wings unfolded a bit.
His face flushed, and I felt like cheering. "Yes," he said stiffly. "Besides de vings."
"Hmm. Besides de vings." Nudge tapped one finger against her chin. "Um..." Her face brightened. "I once ate nine Snickers bars in one sitting. Without barfing. That was a record!"
"Hardly a special talent," ter Borcht said witheringly.
Nudge was offended. "Yeah? Let's see YOU do it."
...
"I vill now eat nine Snickers bars," Gazzy said in a perfect, creepy imitation of ter Borcht's voice, "visout bahfing."
Iggy rubbed his forehead with one hand. "Well, I have a highly developed sense of irony."
Ter Borcht tsked. "You are a liability to your group. I assume you alvays hold on to someone's shirt, yes? Following dem closely?"
"Only when I'm trying to steal their dessert"
...Fang pretended to think, gazing up at the ceiling. "Besides my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica."
"I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahrs!" Gazzy barked.”
― James Patterson

“Man, you weigh a freaking ton," he told me. "What've you been eating, rocks?"
"Why, is your head missing some?" I croaked. His mouth almost quirked in a smile, and that's when I knew how upset he'd been”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“Yes!” said Fang, punching the air. “Freaks rule.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“They turned to Angel. "We will call you Little One," the leader said, obviously deciding to dispense with the whole confusing name thing.
"Okay," said Angel agreeably. "I'll call you Guy in a White Lab Coat." He frowned.
"That can be his Indian name," I suggested.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“You...are...a...fridge...with wings,' Fang ground out, punching an Eraser hard with every word. 'We're...freaking...ballet...dancers.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It's a grain. It's like, like, grits, but with high self-esteem.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“I can talk to fish!" Angel said happily, water dripping off her long, skinny body. "Ask one over for dinner," Fang said, joining us.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Can I come in?
No! I'm in a towel!
I'm blind!”
― James Patterson

“What I said yesterday didn't mean anything! I love everyone in the flock! Plus, it was the Valium talking!"
"Uh-huh. You just keep telling yourself that. You looove me."
Max: (tries to punch him)
"Pick a tree. I'll go carve our initials in it."
Max: (screams and runs into bathroom)”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“I feel like, like pudding," Iggy groaned. "Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“What happened to your tan?"--Fang
"It was dirt." --Max”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“He could totally be your boyfriend," [Angel] went on with annoying persistance. "You guys could get married. I could be like a junior bridesmaid. Total could be your flower dog."
"I'm only a kid!" I shrieked. "I can't get married!"
"You could in New Hampshire."
My mouth dropped open. How does she know this stuff? "Forget it! No one's getting married!" I hissed. "Not in New Hampshire or anywhere else! Not in a box, not with a fox! Now go to sleep, before I kill you!”
― James Patterson, Max

“Max, you're the last of the hybrids who still has...a soul.' ... 'She doesn't have soul,' Gazzy scoffed. 'Have you ever seen her dance?”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“I took a bite of cookie and chewed. “Hmmm,” I said, trying not to spit crumbs. “Clear vanilla notes, too-sweet chocolate chips, distinct flavor of brown sugar. A decent cookie, not spectacular. Still, a good-hearted cookie, not pretentious.” I turned to Fang. “What say you?”
“It’s fine.”
Some people just don’t have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“Max: "Fang! This is a huge break! Of course we should go check it out!"
Fang: "But we're grounded."
Max and Fang: (stare at each other for a second and burst out laughing)”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Here's a freebie: Don't play poker with a kid who can read minds.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“The funny thing about facing imminent death is that it really snaps everything else into perspective.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“You looove me. (holds out arms) You love me this much.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“How did you become blind, uh, Jeff is it?"
Yeah, Jeff. Well, I looked directly at the sun, you know, the way they always tell you not to. If only I had listened.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Q: You'er presented with a smooth-faced, eight-foot-high wooden wall. Your objective? Get over it. To, like, save comrades or something. How to accomplish this?

A: Take a running start, brace one foot against the wall, throw one hand to the top, try to hang on long enough for a comrade to either grab your hand at the top or for another comrade to push your butt up from below. It takes team work!

BKA (bird kid answer): Or you could just, like, fly over it.”
― James Patterson, Max

“He's gonna be fine," I confirmed.
Can we see him?" Iggy asked.
Ig, I hate to break it to you, but you're blind.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Now, Max, I think we both know your parents aren't missionaries."
I opened my eyes wide. "No? Well, for God's sake, don't tell them. They'd be crushed. Thinking they're doing the
Lord's work and all.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Tell me again what we're doing here," I said, running a continuous scan of our surroundings.
Fang popped some Cracker Jack into his mouth. "We're here to watch manly men do manly things."
I followed Fang's line of sight: He was watching the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, who were not doing manly things, by any stretch of the imagination.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“Fang: "There is one bright side to this."
Max: "Yeah? What's that?" The new and improved Erasers would mutilate us before they killed us?
Fang: *grins* You looove me. (holds out arms) You love me this much.
Max: My shriek of appalled rage would probably be heard in California, or maybe Hawaii.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“You were designed to be very smart, Max,' she told me. 'We electrically stimulated your synaptic nerve endings while your brain was developing.' (The director)
And yet I still can't program my DVD player,' I said." (Max)”
― James Patterson

“Holy [Insert your choice of a swear word here]," said Fang stunned.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“Fang: “Let them blow up the world, and global-warm it, and pollute it. You and me and the others will be holed up somewhere, safe. We’ll come back out when they’re all gone, done playing their games of world domination."
Max: “That’s a great plan. Of course, by then we won’t be able to go outside because we’ll get fried by the lack of the ozone layer. We’ll be living at the bottom of the food chain because everything with flavor will be full of mercury or radiation or something! And there won’t be any TV or cable because all the people will be dead! So our only entertainment will be Gazzy singing the constipation song! And there won’t be amusement parks and museums and zoos and libraries and cute shoes! We’ll be like cavemen, trying to weave clothes out of plant fibers. We’ll have nothing! Nothing! All because you and the kids want to kick back in a La-Z-Boy during the most important time in history!”
Fang: “So maybe we should sign you up for a weaving class. Get a jump start on all those plant fibers.”
Max: "I HATE YOU!!!"
Fang: "NO YOU DOOOOOON'T!!"
Voice: "You two are crazy about each other.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports