Jen > Jen's Quotes

“Max: "Okay guys, I had a couple thoughts I wanted to go over with you."
Iggy: (pretends to snore loudy)
Max: (throws another pinecone at him)
Iggy: "Quit throwing things at me!"
Max: "Glad you could join us.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“I want to do it too!" (sitting motionless)
Nudge: "Nope, you stand out like a fart in a church."
Max: (muttering) "Appropriately enough."
Iggy: "What about me?" (stands still)
Max: "No, you're visible."
Iggy: "Am not!"
Max: (throws a pinecone at him) "Could I do that if I wouldn't see you?”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“I didn't know a van could go up on two wheels like that, for so long." -Nudge”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“But if you think I'm going to let you give up on us now, you've got another think coming. Yes, you're a blind mutant freak, but you're my blind mutant freak, and you're coming with me, now, you're coming with us right now, or I swear I will kick your skinny white ass from here to the middle of next week.
Iggy raised his head. Flashes of light told me that the cops were almost on top of us.
Iggy, I need you," I said urgently. "I love you. I need all of you, all five of you, to fell whole myself. Now get up, before I kill you."
Iggy stood. "Well, when you put it that way...”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Walking over to Iggy, he poked him with his shoe. "Does anysing on you vork properly?"
Iggy rubbed his forehead with one hand. "Well, I have a highly developed sense of irony."
Ter Borcht tsked. "You are a liability to your group. I assume you alvays hold onto someone's shirt, yes? Following dem closely?"
"Only when I'm trying to steal their dessert," Iggy said truthfully.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“No one looks like Fang-dark and still and dangerous, like he's daring you to set him off. But I'd seen him rocking Angel when she'd hurt herself; I'd seen him smile in his sleep; I'd seen the deep, darkl ight in his eyes as he leaned over me...
~Max; "Max"; page 24”
― James Patterson, Max

“You mean other than the wings? I once ate nine snicker bars in a row without barfing. It was a record.”
― James Patterson

“Huh - Why is Max in the kitchen?"
Dr.Martinez: "We're cooking."
Gazzy: "She's just keeping you company, right?"
Dr.Martinez: "No, she's cooking."
Nudge: "Cooking...food?"
Max: "Yes, I'm cooking food, and it's great, and you're going to eat it, you twerps!”
― James Patterson, Max

“I muttered a swear word to myself. After I heard Angel cussing like a sailor when she stubbed her toe, my new resolution was to watch my language. All I needed was a six-year-old mutant with a potty mouth”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“The other Max looked at me, and her eyes narrowed. 'They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery,' she said snidely. 'So I guess you're really sucking up.'
'Who are you?' I gasped, my eyes wide. 'You're an impostor!'
'No she isn't.' The little creepy one, Angel, turned to look at me. Her arm was still bleeding where Ari had bitten it. 'You are.'
I swallowed my anger. Who did she think she was, her and her stupid dog? I gave a concerned smile. 'But Angel,' I said, sincerity dripping from my voice, 'how can you say that? You know who I am.'
'I think I'm Angel,' she said. 'And my dog isn't stupid. You're the stupid one, to think that you could fool us. I can read minds, you idiot.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“You're lying through your fangs," Iggy accused.
Fang tried to play innocent--but "innocent Fang" is an oxymoron, so it didn't work.”
― James Patterson, Fang

“Let's just say that if these scientist had been using their brilliance for good instead of evil, cars would run off water vapor and leave fresh compost behind them; no one would be hungry; no one would be ill; all buildings would be earthquake-, bomb-, and flood-proof; and the world's entire economy would have collapsed and been replaced by one based on the value of chocolate. ”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“Gazzy: (Hugging himself and jumping up and down) "I'm brilliant! I'm a genius! I can blow up the world!"
Max: (Raises her eyebrows)
Gazzy: "Not that I would want to, of course," (coughs)”
― James Patterson, Max

“You're children. Don't you want a home, a family?"
"With, like, vitamin-fortified cereal and educational television?”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“Feeding a crowd?' the woman behind the counter asked.
Yes, ma'am ,' Fang said sweetly.
Yeah, him and all his split personalities, I thought.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“Why was the blind guy playing with matches, you ask? Because he's good at it. Anything to do with fire, igniting things, exploding things, things with fuses, wicks, accelerants . . . Iggy's your man. It's one of those good/bad things.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“In case you guys didn't catch last week's episode, I'm out of the flock," I informed them. "Angel has no allegiance to me. She's wanted me gone for a long time. And in case you didn't catch all the episodes from the past year, Angel is... unbalanced."

"Untrustworthy," Fang seconded.

"Unpredictable," Jeb added.

"Dangerous," Dylan chimed in.”
― James Patterson, Fang

“Gazzy, man, jeezum!" Fang exclaimed. "What the heck have you been eating for God's sake?"
That was a smoke bomb!" Gazzy defended himself. "Not even i could fill this whole flippin' house!”
― James Patterson, Fang

“Iggy: Now what? Who you gonna call?
A quiet voice in the hallway outside: Ghostbusters!
(Captain Perry and John groan)
John: That phrase is ruined forever.”
― James Patterson, Max

“Fang snorted in disbelief. "On one hand, we have a mythical nice family that wants to adopt me. On the other, we have a gang of insane scientists desperate to do genetic experiments on innocent children. Guess which hand I get dealt?”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“It's funny how different people are. If I'd been this kid and someone was snarling "Ordering a pizza?" at me, without even thinking, I would have snarled back "Yeah. You want pepperoni?"
-Maximum Ride”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“And Max, I've put some scraps in a bowl for your dog," Mom said. "It's on the floor, by the back door."
The flock and I went still.
Uh-oh, I thought.
Total stomped up to me, his glare accusing. "A bowl on the floor!" he seethed. "Why don't you just chain me to a stake in the yard and throw me a bone!”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“I'm a girl of extremes. When I love something, I'm like a puppy dog (without all the licking). When I'm cranky, I'm a wasp (like a whole hive of 'em). And when I'm angry, I'm a Mother Bear with a predator after her cubs: Dangerous.”
― James Patterson, Fang

“Fang: When do I get out of here?
Max: They say a week.
Fang: So, like, tomorrow?
Max: That's what I'm thinking.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“The instructor stared at me with cold, cut-me-no-slack determination, then got into a fighting stance, holding one hand out, beckoning me.
"I saw that movie too!"I said."It was like the coolest movie of all-"
He launched himself at me.
That was when his day really went downhill.”
― James Patterson, Max

“Uh-oh,' said Gazzy, but Angel was so nauseated she didn't have time to leap to a safe distance, or grab a gas mask
Bbbbbrrrrrrrttthhhhhhttttttt.
'Mother of God, no!' Total cried, doing a fast belly-crawl to the pool and throwing himself in. 'You said it wasn't your digestive system!'
'What was that?' Dylan asked. He winced and threw an arm oer his nose and mouth.
...
'Sorry,' Gazzy said miserably, but he couldn't help a tiny grin.
Nudge was clawing at a stack of towels to cover her face.
'Nice one, Gaz,' said Iggy.
...
'Wait-that was Gazzy? Is that why you call him...Oh, crap,' Dylan said weakly.”
― James Patterson, Fang

“So, Angel?" I said, looking over at her. She was gliding through the night, her eight-foot wings looking like a dove's. "Have you picked up anything from Anne, about anything? Anything off?"
Not really." Angel thought. "From what I can tell, she does work for the FBI. She does care about us and wants us to be happy. She thinks the boys are slobs.
I'm blind," Iggy said irritably. "How am I supposed to make everything all tidy?"
Yeah, because you're so handicapped," I said sarcastically. "Like- you can't build bombs or cook or win at Monopoly. You can't tell us apart by the feel of our skin or feathers.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Look, we're trying to explore other options to your retirement," the whitecoat said. "You might be useful to us in other ways."
Because we're not that useful dead,"Nudge said thoughtfully.
No," I agreed. "Well, maybe as doorstops."
The whitecat made an "eew" expression.
Or those things in a parking lot that show where the cars should stop," suggested Iggy. He closed his eyes and went stiff, to demonstrate what it would look like.
Also an option.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“Their mothers were nobodies," Marian (Max's mom) said. "Donor eggs. Lab workers, techs, anyone we found. That was the point- that we could create a superrace out of anything. Out of trash."
Well, you're right there," I said. "Because we are a superrace. And I did come from trash.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“And Flock Rule Number Two is, Don't argue with Max or you'll live to regret it." I spun and stomped out to the clearing, turning back for one last jab at Dylan. "And by the way, you clearly DON'T know me better than Fang does. Do you see Fang arguing with me? No, you do not."
Fang rolled his eyes.”
― James Patterson