Samantha Grenier > Samantha's Quotes

“I'm an elephant today. I will need to have lots of room and also a bowl of water on the floor.”
― Jesse Ball, The Curfew

“If you aren't cute, you may as well be clever.”
― David Sedaris, Me Talk Pretty One Day

“They can't tell so much about you if you got your eyes closed.”
― Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

“I, myself, am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”
― Augusten Burroughs

“We’re all searching for something to fill up what I like to call that big, God-shaped hole in our souls. Some people use alcohol, or sex, or their children, or food, or money, or music, or heroin. A lot of people even use the concept of God itself. I could go on and on. I used to know a girl who used shoes. She had over two-hundred pairs. But it’s all the same thing, really. People, for some stupid reason, think they can escape their sorrows.”
― Tiffanie DeBartolo, God-Shaped Hole

“I find it ridiculous to assign a gender to an inanimate object incapable of disrobing and making an occasional fool of itself. Why refer to lady crack pipe or good sir dishrag when these things could never live up to all that their sex implied?”
― David Sedaris, Me Talk Pretty One Day

“It's the truth, even if it didn't happen...

...if they don't exist, how can a man see them?”
― Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

“Good writin' ain't necessarily good readin'.”
― Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

“The stars up close to the moon were pale; they got brighter and braver the farther they got out of the circle of light ruled by the giant moon”
― Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

“...I think apparatus burned out all over the ward trying to adjust to her come busting in like she did-took electronic readings on her and calculated they weren't built to handle something like this on the ward, and just burned out, like machines committing suicide.”
― Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

“What police officer would dare ticket Death's minivan?”
― Augusten Burroughs, Magical Thinking: True Stories

“The only other people who have had experiences similar to those of this man were locked up inside institutions for the criminally insane. The difference is, this guy gets business cards.”
― Augusten Burroughs, Magical Thinking: True Stories

“There are only the pursued, the pursuing, the busy and the tired.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

“Want any of this stuff? Jordan?... Nick?"
I didn't answer.
Nick?" he asked again.
What?"
Want any?"
No... I just remembered that today's my birthday."
I was thirty. Before me stretched the portentous, menacing road of a new decade.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

“As we passed over the dark bridge her wan face fell lazily against my coat's shoulder and the formidable stroke of thirty died away with the reassuring pressure of her hand.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

“Better to sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunk Christian.”
― Herman Melville, Moby-Dick or, The Whale

“Queequeg was a native of Kokovoko, an island far away to the West and South. It is not down in any map; true places never are.”
― Herman Melville, Moby-Dick or, The Whale

“and tell him to paint me a sign, with-"no suicides permitted here, and no smoking in the parlor;" might as well kill both birds at once.”
― Herman Melville, Moby-Dick or, The Whale

“when I felt a sudden sharp poke in my rear, and turning round, was horrified at the apparition of Captain Peleg in the act of withdrawing his leg from my immediate vicinity. That was my first kick.”
― Herman Melville, Moby-Dick or, The Whale

“Consider the subtleness of the sea; how its most dreaded creatures glide under water, unapparent for the most part, and treacherously hidden beneath the loveliest tints of azure..... Consider all this; and then turn to this green, gentle , and most docile earth; consider them both, the sea and the land; and do you not find a strange analogy to something in yourself?”
― Herman Melville, Moby-Dick or, The Whale

“but I have no mind for business and considered staying awake to be enough of an accomplishment.”
― David Sedaris, Me Talk Pretty One Day

“At the end of a miserable day, instead of grieving my virtual nothing, I can always look at my loaded wastepaper basket and tell myself that if I failed, at least I took a few trees down with me.”
― David Sedaris, Me Talk Pretty One Day

“I was just struggling with my inner vachette and pondering the depths of my own inhumanity.”
― David Sedaris, Me Talk Pretty One Day

“Hugh consoled me, saying, "Don't let it get to you. There are plenty of things you're good at."

When asked for some examples, he listed vacuuming and naming stuffed animals. He says he can probably come up with a few more, but he'll need some time to think.”
― David Sedaris, Me Talk Pretty One Day

“God, I felt certain, did not mind that I didn’t press my hands together to pray. I was casual, but I was sincere. I knew that God existed as the Correct Answer inside my chest.”
― Augusten Burroughs, A Wolf at the Table

“I slipped on a turtleneck, laughing when my head became stuck in the turtle part. If they weren't called turtlenecks, I wouldn't have worn them.”
― Augusten Burroughs, A Wolf at the Table

“I love you," she said, and I knew she meant it because she spoke the words from the heart at the center of her chest. This, at least, had not been left behind at the hospital.”
― Augusten Burroughs, A Wolf at the Table

“I nodded again, but I knew I would not grow up to drive a bulldozer. It would be awful to be dirty all day like these men. I didn't say it, but at best I would keep one in the backyard, like a goat.”
― Augusten Burroughs, A Wolf at the Table

“I discovered the bleeding when he licked my hand and left a swath of blood behind, death's autograph.”
― Augusten Burroughs, A Wolf at the Table

“We are healthy only to the extent that our ideas are humane.”
― Kurt Vonnegut, Breakfast of Champions