Robert > Robert's Quotes

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  • #1
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    Albert Einstein

  • #2
    Mae West
    “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
    Mae West

  • #3
    Garrison Keillor
    “Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
    Garrison Keillor

  • #4
    Robert A. Heinlein
    “Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
    Robert A. Heinlein

  • #5
    Benjamin Franklin Wade
    “Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”
    Benjamin Franklin Wade

  • #6
    “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
    Narcotics Anonymous

  • #7
    Douglas Adams
    “The story so far:
    In the beginning the Universe was created.
    This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”
    Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

  • #8
    John Green
    “Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.”
    John Green

  • #9
    Markus Herz
    “Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you'll die of a misprint.”
    Markus Herz

  • #10
    George Carlin
    “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
    George Carlin

  • #11
    Bill Watterson
    “Reality continues to ruin my life.”
    Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

  • #12
    Mark Twain
    “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
    Mark Twain

  • #13
    Charles Bukowski
    “Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”
    Charles Bukowski

  • #14
    Billy Sunday
    “Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.”
    Billy Sunday, "Billy" Sunday, the man and his message: with his own words which have won thousands for Christ

  • #15
    George V. Higgins
    “This life’s hard, but it’s harder if you’re stupid.”
    George V. Higgins, The Friends of Eddie Coyle

  • #16
    C.E.M. Joad
    “Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
    C.E.M. Joad

  • #17
    Rita Mae Brown
    “The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.”
    Rita Mae Brown

  • #18
    Mark Twain
    “Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”
    Mark Twain

  • #19
    Lewis Carroll
    “It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.”
    Lewis Carroll

  • #20
    Douglas Adams
    “I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
    Douglas Adams

  • #21
    Thomas Szasz
    “Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.”
    Thomas Szasz

  • #22
    Albert Einstein
    “When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.”
    Albert Einstein

  • #23
    Jane Austen
    “I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.”
    Jane Austen, Jane Austen's Letters

  • #24
    Oscar Levant
    “There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.”
    Oscar Levant

  • #25
    E.B. White
    “If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.”
    E.B. White

  • #26
    Mae West
    “I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.”
    Mae West

  • #27
    Isaac Asimov
    “Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.”
    Isaac Asimov, Foundation

  • #28
    Jerome K. Jerome
    “I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.”
    Jerome K. Jerome

  • #29
    W.C. Fields
    “If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.”
    W.C. Fields

  • #30
    Stephanie Klein
    “Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.”
    Stephanie Klein, Straight Up and Dirty



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