Shannon Ables's Blog, page 294

Style Inspiration: Summer Time

Yesterday was the first official day of summer, and oh wasn’t it sweet? With the longest day of the year, ideal temperatures in the high 70s and a flexible schedule to wiggle and tweak to my content, I don’t remember a better start to the summer season. And with the change of seasons, comes a change of attire: cooler, looser, yet still chic as each of today’s Style Inspiration images demonstrates. Beginning with the casual approach above with Rag & Bone’s ‘Noa’ espadrille slip-on, to the delicious button up silk and linen clothing below, I don’t know about you, but summer looks absolutely fabulous. (Remember: simply click on the image to be taken to the source or shop the look if available.)

~Loving that bag? Yep, me too. Shop for it here.~

~Style Inspiration posts from the Archives:

~Extra, Extra Summer Style

~Summer Chic

~Loose & Chic

~Shop TSLL Capsule Wardrobe Essentials for Spring, Fall & All-Season here

Images: click on the image to be taken to the source

The post Style Inspiration: Summer Time appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

What Lin-Manuel Miranda Taught Me

“When great people cross our path, it forces us to reckon with what we’re doing with our lives.” —Lin-Manuel Miranda, the creator of the 11-time Tony award winning musical Hamilton
~The Simple Sophisticate, episode #108

The people we come into contact throughout our lives either enter to offer an opportunity for us to change and grow as an individual or an opportunity for us inspire change in that person. And while we will never know the latter, we can always be aware of the former. And while sometimes the person who offers us a life lesson or an aha moment is someone who we are thankful to no longer have contact with, sometimes, and I would argue if we are continually learning and applying the lessons, more often than not they are people we feel fortunate to have crossed paths with.

And while Miranda clearly never met founding father of the United States Alexander Hamilton in the flesh, he did however meet him due to his curiosity and exploration. Perhaps that is how you have met many of the people who have opened your eyes of how to live a better or more in alignment life with who you are and can be. Maybe in a book, a class, the theater or a documentary. Maybe you were able to see them in the flesh, but only listen to their lessons from the seat as an audience member. No matter how a great person has crossed you path, when they do, if you are open, if you are ready and if you have an inkling that you may just have more to give than what you already are, you will be spurred to live ever so slightly or magnificently different.

And no matter what you are spurred to change or to do, the ability to master these four components (shown below) will hold a key to your success of making the most of your life no matter what occurred in your past, no matter what people expect of you, no matter what your imagination up until now has limited you into believing was possible. So whether a great someone recently crossed your path or did so years ago and you still haven’t capitalized on the ahas they brought to your life, here are the four tools that once you accept and incorporate into your life will bring about change in profound ways.

 

1.Create a clear life vision

“Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life, because you become what you believe.” —Oprah

In order to know what to do, we must know where we want to go. Sounds simple. But sometimes the mere act of writing down what we desire, want or envision for ourselves is intimidating. Whether because we feel we are being too selfish or asking for the impossible because we’ve never quite seen it come true for anyone else that we see as being similar to ourselves, the act of writing down what we want our lives to become is a powerful first step.

It doesn’t have to be written down with such exquisite detail as “The house I will eventually buy will be blue“,  but it should be something such as “I will be living in a home of my own which will provide me with sanctuary, security and a place to spend with those I love.”  

There is a concrete goal as well as a reason for why you are seeking it within that last statement. You can make it a reality when you know precisely what you are seeking. You can now set mini goals, no matter how many it will take, to help you attain this goal. Be brave. Set a grand vision for yourself. And then believe in yourself enough to do the work that is necessary every single day. It will happen. It’s only a matter of time and initiative.

2. Embrace your awesomeness

Take the time to listen, explore and come to understand who you are, what you are drawn to and what talents you have that may seem ordinary to you because you’ve had them all of your life but are actually quite extraordinary. Discover your strengths, be mindful of your weaknesses, and accept the entire you that you are.

Stop trying to seek approval from others who you feel are superior. Instead try to accept yourself. Come to understand why you might subconsciously seek out people who have traits you wish you had. By way of doing this, you may be seeking external approval, so when they for whatever reason reject you, you see this as a rejection of yourself. It is not. Instead seek out others who have similar strengths. Are you HSP (highly sensitive person)? Stop seeking and expecting non-HSPs to be über-sensitive, and embrace their strengths. As well, begin to seek out people who can appreciate your strengths, perhaps other HSPs or others who are aware of the strengths HSPs possess. The same can be said for any strength a person may possess.

If we repeatedly return to people who don’t understand us and based on their confusion or rejection lead us to feel unworthy (which we aren’t), we are ultimately inflicting the pain upon ourselves. But if we recognize there will just be some people who we cannot connect with on a deeper level, we can peacefully move on and seek out others who we feel comfortable being our awesome selves and we reveling in their awesomeness as well.

When we know ourselves fully, we can ascertain more quickly and accurately who to invest our emotions with and who to keep at arm’s length. We give ourselves a powerful tool and a clearer path to fulfillment when we stop trying to impress and befriend everyone and instead befriend authentic and mutually appreciative companions.

3. Let go and move forward

Let go of cyncism, let go of stereotypes, let go of extra stuff, let go of these six fixed life ideas, let go of what others think, know what let go of and what to hang on to and discover how letting go will elevate your life. In my first post focused on the topic of letting go, I address the reason letting go is so difficult. It is fearful to let go of what we know even if it isn’t exactly or at all what we want. However, the only way to realize our greatness, and create the grandest vision in reality for ourselves is to let go of what is holding us back or blocking our path.

Whether it is the negative thoughts we allow to creep into our minds (discover and learn and then become habituated in how to retrain our thoughts), seeking out people who perpetually unknowingly or willing thrash the self we are (limit or eliminate time and energy with these individuals), or daily habits in our diction, routines that perpetuate unknowingly the life we don’t wish to lead (acknowledgement and self-discipline must be adhered to), we must let go.

And when we let go, we dare to fly. We dare to fly into a horizon that up until now we only gazed upon with admiration and affection. It may take longer to get there than we had imagined, but if we keep flying, if we keep trying to learn and grow, the vision can become a reality.

4. Form a partnership with your mind

“If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place.” —Lao Tzu

The thoughts we think spontaneously are very much like a record that has completed playing and just spins around and around. It is stuck basically, but an alternate route has not been given, so it keeps doing what it knows how to do – whether it works (plays nothing for anyone to hear) or not.

In order to change the thoughts that are not working for us: worry about our future, doubt about the success we can attain, negative self-talk, anything that is not helpful, we must purposefully change the thoughts that we automatically jump to in our weakest moments. We have to build up our mind’s ability, much like a muscle and keep exercising it regularly. The good news is, we are capable of changing our mind’s patterns. Why? Because we made them in the first place. Maybe not consciously, and maybe by influence from those we grew up with or surround ourselves with, but we made those ruts, those tracks that do not serve us, and therefore, we can make new tracks.

It will take time, but it is possible.

A few other ways to keep our mind in shape:

~Practice creative visualization.

Albert Bandura, a Stanford University psychologist is credited with defining the term self-efficacy theory, which is the “idea that we need to believe in our own capabilities to effect change and lead successful lives”. And if we can successfully visualize and then bring to fruition what we imagine, we not only reach our goals we “experience a greater sense of wellbeing, of optimism, of happiness.”

~Practice daily meditation

In a post written in 2014, I share six powerful ways regular mediation can change our lives for the better. From reducing stress to increasing productivity, even just five minutes each morning every day will have a profound difference. Don’t know how to meditate? I break that down as well in this post. And just for the record, I still only meditate five minutes each time. While I am working up toward 15-20 minutes, even just the small amount done regularly has brought significant calm each time I make the time to do so.

Four fundamental tools that will take you places you may have never thought even possible.

Get ready for a transformation because it’s coming. And while it will appear slow, gradual and maybe even non-existent to you, I encourage you to keep a journal as you make the journey of change. Because it is happening, and you will be forever thankful for that great person who crossed your path.

~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~3 Simple Steps for Designing Your Best Life

~Why Not . . . Get to Know Yourself?

~11 Tips to Cultivate Good Habits

~11 Things You Must Do to Create the Life of Your Dreams

Petit Plaisir
~Blueberry Rhubarb Mini Galettes

~click here for the entire recipe

 

Images: (0) (1) (2) (3) (4)

The post What Lin-Manuel Miranda Taught Me appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

A New Summer Dessert – Blueberry & Rhubarb Galette

Spring, especially early spring, signifies the arrival of one of the earliest fruits to arrive in the garden: rhubarb. And as I have forever been a fan of rhubarb tarts and especially strawberry rhubarb tarts and pies, I heard a rumor while listening to my weekly favorite podcast The Splendid Table of a new combination with rhubarb that I couldn’t wait to try: blueberries and rhubarb. What? It couldn’t be! Another delicious combination that melds the tart stalk with the sweet delicate berry? I was on board to give it a try, and the results did not disappoint.

I scoured the internet for recipes and found they were as varied as people, so I returned to my tried and true recipes for rhubarb tarts and made a few simple changes regarding amounts, but just a few.

Key things to remember for ultimate flavor:

Fresh is best! Period.
Do not put the blueberries in the refrigerator after bringing them home from the market. You will be tempted, but do not do it. Flavor will be lost.
Keep it simple: chill the dough before rolling it out, this recipe is buttery and just enough sweet it will knock your socks off and buy fresh, local fruit in season.
It’s okay if you combine more than 1 1/2 cup of either fruit, just make sure they are equal to each other. 

Blueberry Rhubarb Galette

yield: 4-6 mini galettes, or one galette

Ingredients:

Filling

1 1/2 cup fresh blueberries (a carton found at the market)
1 1/2 cup diced rhubarb
1/2 cup light brown sugar
1 tsp orange zest (lemon zest can be substituted)
1/4 cup flour

Pastry

1/2 cup unsalted butter
1 cup flour
1/8 cup sugar
a pinch of salt
2-3 Tablespoons chilled water

Crumble

2 Tbs sugar
2 Tbs brown sugar
1/3 cup flour
1/3 cup oatmeal
3 Tbs unsalted butter – melted

Directions

Make the pastry either with a food processor or a pastry cutter or a fork. Add the butter (cubed), flour, sugar and salt, mix until a cornmeal-like texture appears. Add the water gradually (you may need more or less depending upon the humidity of where you live). Watch the dough. It should become just like pea-size pieces gradually, but not sticky. You want to have some attachment, but also be loose. Better to be too loose like than too combined. Roll into a ball, warp in plastic wrap and place in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes.
Preheat oven to 425 degrees Fahrenheit.
Combine the filling: rhubarb, blueberries, zest, brown sugar and flour. Gently toss to combine. Set aside.
Make the crumble: in a small sauce pan, melt the butter on low heat. While the butter is melting, mix the dry ingredients in a small bowl. Once the butter has melted, remove from heat and add the dry ingredients. Mix with a fork to combine. Set aside.
Remove the dough from the refrigerator. Cut into four (or six – depending upon the size of your galettes) pieces. Roll out the dough on a floured and sugar surface to prevent from sticking. I roll my dough out on a pastry frame (as seen here in this TSLL recipe) or between two pieces of wax paper.
Place dough for each galette one at a time on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Place the filling into the center of the dough, leaving 1 1/2″ on the edge for folding. Begin to fold the edges up, layering one on top of the other. If you are having a hard time making the dough stick, either remove some fruit or dab a bit of water under each fold. Add a teaspoon of unsalted butter on the top of each fruit pile and then cover with the crumble. If you want a nice, brown crust, brush with egg white. Repeat with each tart. You may need two baking sheets.
Place in the oven for fifteen minutes. Then reduce the temperature to 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 20 minutes.
Remove, cool for a 5-10 minutes and then enjoy with or without ice cream!

The post A New Summer Dessert – Blueberry & Rhubarb Galette appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

This & That: No. 214

Book
—Everybody Behaves Badly: The True Story Behind Hemingway’s Masterpiece The Sun Also Rises by  Lesley M. M. Blume

The expats that came to produce some of the most well-known, remembered and commonly taught novels from the 1920s have always been intriguing to the literary curious. And for many, especially Ernest Hemingway. His successful novel The Sun Also Rises was produced during a time in France and Spain that involved many tales to tell, yet not all have been shared or revealed until now. In Lesley M. M. Blume’s new biography, she reveals how Hemingway’s legend became what we know it today: hard-drinking, a bon vivant, charmer of women, brawling and a boisterous literary genius. Released last week, if Hemingway and the intriguing time period in the 1920s piques your interest, this book is worth picking up.

Entertaining
— Linen Napkins (set of 4) Sur La Table

Summer time means dining outside under the stars while the warm temps allow us to bask in the perfect setting for relaxing and indulging in delicious barbecue faire. And why not dress up the table with simple, yet beautiful linen napkins? With more than 10 different colors to choose from, Sur La Table’s set of 4 linen napkins are less than $20.  A great deal for a beautiful simple touch.

Shopping
—Banana Republic Pleated Ombre Midi Dress

If you are looking for a touch of color this summer season, but Banana Republic’s stunning green/emerald ombre midi dress full with pleats will be a stunner. And the price isn’t bad either.

—Banana Republic Wrap Front Print Cami

Layers, layers, layers. Remembering that v-necks help to elongate our neck and silhouette, this beautiful striped camisole is well-priced and a classic item for your summer capsule wardrobe.

— Madewell Ultimate Leather Motorcycle Jacket

Having a leather jacket that is precisely the style you want can be hard to find, especially when the classic designs are up near $1000 for a quality item. And while the purchase will be one that will be worn for many years, if not decades to come, Madewell has a classic motorcyle jacket that may just be what you’re looking for.

~Single Rope Hammock on Gilt

As someone who has fallen in love with her hammock, the essential component for this leisure summer accessory is the wooden bar that keeps the hammock spread out so you don’t become squashed like a cocoon. Also important, having realized after I made my purchase last year is for your hammock to be made of material that can dry out quickly if it gets hit with summer showers. This polyester rope hammock is perfect and even more perfect at the reduced price.

Television
—Odd Mom Out, Season 2 Premiere

One laugh-out loud comedy that is returning this summer that I highly recommend is Odd Mom Out. The second season premieres on June 20th at 10pm on Bravo, and get ready for some hilarious antics by Jill Kargman and crew. Starring as Jill Weber, a married mother of three who is indeed the odd mom out as her husband’s family is from the social elite living on the Upper East Side, her normalcy, her candid remarks and frank observations about the absurdities she experiences in everyday life is worth tuning in for. Have a look at the trailer for the new season below.

~recipe for Classic Caramel Slices~

The official start to summer is just around the corner, and my kick off to summer officially begins today as classes wrapped up and grades were turned in. The weather this week has been cool and temperate with a bit of rain from time to time. And for me, this is ideal. The calm, jacket-necessary days provoke me to sit down, become clear and gather up my excitement for a summer I cannot wait to dive into.

As the common question goes for all of us, I have a feeling, “Any fun plans this summer holiday?”. Bien sur! But for the first time in more than four years, I will be staying in Oregon. To hear myself say that I am not hopping on a plane to journey somewhere is odd, but I cannot express how wholly exuberant I am about exploring my new hometown, diving into more blog and book work and helping pull together a project that will be revealed in the fall (as I mentioned on Sunday). So as the pennies are being saved for my next European excursion, the dreams are being built this summer, and it is my hope that it will pay off in more ways than I might have ever imagined.

Below are some articles, as well as one video, to speak to your French predilections as well as curiosity for life inspiration. Enjoy your weekend and until Monday, bonne journée!

~A Beginner’s Guide to French Cheese

~Is the technology we use every day eradicating our ability to reflect? This great opinion piece was featured in Sunday’s New York Times on just this topic.

~The Life Changing Travel Experiences You Need at Every Age

~20 Places to Go for the Best Views in Paris

~The Best Way to Use a French Market Basket (Besides Toting It)

~This year’s Harvard Commencement address. It’s worth sitting down for 20 minutes. Trust me.

~10 Secrets to Decorating like a Parisian

Images: (2)

The post This & That: No. 214 appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

Why Not . . . Add a Touch of France to Your Decor?

“If you love something, it will work. That’s the only real rule.” —Bunny Williams

Many of us are not so lucky to live in a French country home nestled just hours away from Paris, but that doesn’t mean we can’t decorate our interiors with a touch of the French aesthetic if that is indeed what we love. From the simple touches of trays and art, to carefully selected furniture by the way of settees and coffee and side tables, the French style we love can be ours no matter where we call home.

As I have been diving into my decor as of late, I am noticing that I am indeed drawn to the French aesthetic. Perhaps more cozy chic French (as I discussed in this post), but a touch of high and low, regal and comfortable is the balance I tend to strive for.

And while my budget is in save mode at the moment after having just purchased a new sofa, I couldn’t help but share a few finds as One Kings Lane just made available some exquisite French vintage finds as well as items that would complete the French aesthetic in your home if that is indeed the look you are aiming for.

So what exactly does Parisian Chic decor entail? Well, based on what One Kings Lane has gathered it involves:

Touches of gold
Art – scultpures, paintings and illustrations
Statement framed mirrors
19th century walnut furniture
Art deco designs
Empire-style tables and beds
Accent chairs that mesmerize
Settees that stun
Louis XV style legs on tables and chairs
Vases to showcase beautiful bouquets
Nesting tables
Lamps with bases as beautiful as the sofa they sit beside
Plush throw pillows

And while the items can be found online, allow this post to be an inspiration for you as you head out to the local flea markets, yard and garage sales as well as estate sales. You never know what you will find, but if you know generally what aesthetic you are looking for, you are more likely to know it when you see it.

View all of their finds here, and below shop (hover and click) the Parisian bedrooms and living room I pulled together:

Living Room



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Bedroom



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~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~Why Not . . . Style A Cozy French Living Room?

~French Oak Chevron Wood Floors

~Decor Inspiration: A Provence Estate

 

 

Image: source

 

The post Why Not . . . Add a Touch of France to Your Decor? appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

Relax: 21 Ways to Know You’re Doing Just Fine in This Thing Called Life

“Embrace uncertainty. Some of the most beautiful chapters in our lives won’t have a title until much later.” —Bob Goff
~The Simple Sophisticate, episode #107

It sometimes happens when we’ve been giving it our all plus an extra 10% for quite some time that when we finally take our foot off of the accelerator, even for a moment or even if to celebrate and take a deep breath to reflect on how far we’ve come, our mind hasn’t adjusted yet and as well, our body finally finds its chance to collapse so it can rejuvenate. Although the rejuvenation to us translates into being sick.

Confession: This has happened to me two different times in my life, once in college after having finishing a fall quarter while holding down three additional jobs, 21 credits and contemplating calling off a wedding, and two years ago after spending a year editing my first book and teaching full-time, all the while trying and failing to acquire a job in Bend. My body quit. My body, due to the stress my mind and life had imposed upon it said, “No more. And since you won’t listen, I’m taking you down because that is what you need to get better.”

And because our body screams for rest, our mind too needs a tune-up often times. Often our mind, whether because we’ve made tremendous progress but haven’t reached our goal yet, or because it is just too murky to see clearly, it cannot trust that we are doing just fine. It cannot see how well we are doing or how far we’ve come. And because we are exhausted, we don’t second-guess our murky mind. But we should.

Today, I’d like to share with you 21 ways to know you are doing just fine in this thing called life even if your mind wants to play tricks on you from time to time.

I have a feeling that many of you are strivers, goal-setters and absolute devout dreamers when it comes to embracing and diving into life. What an amazing approach to life that opens up the richness of the everyday and the endless possibilities of all that we can make a reality. But sometimes as we’re busy doing, planning and charging ahead to attain, we may question whether or not we’re really doing all right. For whatever reason, doubt, an over heard comment that rattles us for a moment, a mini goal wasn’t reached on time, etc. And I’m here to tell you immediately, you are.

Why? Because I’ve had these doubts, I’ve had that question dance around in my mind, “Am I doing all right? Is my life on track according to my goals and wishes?” And once I move through that moment, and recognize my emotions were heightened due to either my lack of rest or clarity, I sit back and remind myself, “Yes, I am doing more than all right at this thing called life.” And I have a pretty good feeling, so are you. Let’s have a look at the list below.

1. You have a job that pays the bills plus a little extra.

2. You eat food to enjoy the experience.

3. You’re 75% sure of the things you don’t and what you do want.

Having some wiggle room of uncertainty isn’t a bad thing. And in fact, I would argue it is a very healthy thing because it means you are flexible and open to life and what it might present to you unexpectedly.

4. You understand that emotions, some emotions, can be temporary.

“It is the mark of an educated mind to entertain a thought without accepting it.” —Aristotle

I have written this quote into my planner as a on-hand reminder to check my emotions and my seemingly absurd thoughts from time to time. It’s okay to have any thought you want, but it doesn’t mean to you have to trust, accept or believe everything you think.

5. You’ve experienced and survived heartbreak or disappointment at least once in your life

“And don’t worry about losing. If it is right, it happens — the main thing is not to hurry. Nothing good gets away.”  —John Steinbeck

If you have taken risks, taken a chance, stepped out on a limb, and it didn’t work out, but you’re reading this it means you’ve survived to tell the tale. If nothing else, use those experiences to bolster your courage as you move forward toward other dreams and goals. Don’t see it as a failure, see it as an exercise in building strength and confidence.

6. You don’t need constant approval from your boss, your friends, your family, your spouse, etc.

“There’s no magic way to find yourself. It’s not out in the wilderness or in another country or city. Or in the deep depths of a book. Or waiting in solitude. It’s right there, in you. And if you never find a way to appreciate yourself, you’ll never see it.” —Anthony Allevato

When we’re not sure of our path, journey or decisions, we can reach out to others for their approval. And while if we’re seeking guidance from a source that is an expert in the field we have questions about, this is a wise idea, but if we are seeking approval so that we can move toward something we are excited about, we need to first give ourselves permission to leap. We need to trust ourselves, we need to appreciate that our dreams and ideas may be different from others, and while their support would do wonders, we must accept and take responsibility for the life we are trying to build. If we believe in ourselves, when we stumble, it will be easier to get back up and keep going forward.

7. You have curiosity about something and are doing something in that arena to tickle your curiosity

Maybe it is a hobby right now or maybe it is something within your career, whatever tickles your mind, include it in some capacity in your life.

8. You have a place to call your home.

9. You have a discretionary income for simple luxuries.

Perhaps a bouquet of flowers for the week or a decadent cup of coffee and croissant. If you can treat yourself to these simple luxuries, you are doing very well indeed.

10. You can reflect and see you’ve grown as an individual

Simply looking back to last year, if you have improved in some capacity, learned a certain lesson, shifted in such a way to improve the quality of your life, you are doing very well indeed.

11. You have doubts

You’re human and you still want to grow and improve. You recognize that you, as we all are, are and always will be a work in process, and you also recognize this is normal, doubt that is. Doubt demonstrates that you care about living well. You want to reach your full potential.

12. Your bills are paid

A monthly celebration is in order. Revel in the small things because they are indeed more impressive than you may know.

13. You have a friend or two who care about you and you them. 

Healthy, loving relationships, no matter how many, if you have one or two, you are blessed.

14.You have clothes to wear that allow you to be yourself – comfortable and authentic.

It doesn’t have to be many, but if you can pull an outfit together and feel comfortable and authentic, you are living well.

15. Goals: You’ve set them, achieved a few or more and are working toward a few more at the moment.

16. Challenges: You’ve overcome a few along the way and are still standing.

“No matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger – something better, pushing right back.” –  Albert Camus

17. You’re self-sufficient

If you can make your own money, get to work on your own, pay your bills, tend to the everyday errands, routines and chores without needing help, you’re doing wonderfully. This doesn’t mean you can’t work with others or share life’s responsibilities with a partner, but if you had to, you could do everything. Knowing this, is a significant peace of mind and a very good sign.

18. Your body works for you, quite well.

No aches? No pains? Able to walk, smile, feel, taste, see and move? Time for the happy dance!

19. You’re not completely comfortable or at ease because you refuse to settle and recognize you can handle the challenge even if you don’t know what it will look like.

20. You’re exhausted

Because you’re trying. You’re doing your best. Now get some sleep, become more comfortable with saying no and taking time for yourself and adjust your schedule as you can so you can do your best tomorrow.

21. You’ve put your feelings out there, made yourself vulnerable

“Have patience, heart.”— Homer

You’re not afraid to love, and even if you get smacked down or ignored, you are practicing a very good habit to refuse to be cynical and to be determined to have faith that you will make connections.

The life we want to live is the life we are living now, whether it seems that way in the moment or not. To appreciate where we are is to give power to the future we desire materializing before our very eyes. So when you have those moments of exhaustion and your mind begins to play tricks on you and question how well you are doing, take the time to glance over the list above and remind yourself (and your mind) that you are doing just fine, very fine indeed. And if a nap or a mini vacation is needed, find a way to give your body and your life what it needs for you to full appreciate all that you are doing well. Because you are doing so much quite magnificently.

~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~The Difference Between Having Doubts & Being Scared

~10 Tools Fulfilled People Utilize in their Life to Squash Negativity (podcast)

~10 Signs You’re on the Right Track

Petit Plaisir:

~The Course of Love by Alain de Botton

In 1993 Alain de Botton published his first book On Love which became an international best-seller. A fictional tale of a man and woman who meet while on a flight from London to Paris. Over the course of the tale, anyone who has ever experienced the angst, confusion, euphoria and hope of new love will be able to empathize with either or both of the characters. Since his immediate success, he has written many essays and non-fiction works, but he has returned this month with a much-anticipated fictional journey in The Course of Love, officially being released tomorrow.

Having had the opportunity to read an advanced copy, I alluded to my enjoyment of the book in this post, as the book was devoured in less than a day. As we are introduced to Rabih and Kirsten as they are introduced to each other, we follow them through the “disproportionate attention” given to the start of their relationship as Botton adds commentary in inserted italicized commentary throughout the entire novel about love, society’s perception, the reality and realizations we come to find well after it would have been good to know. At this particular stage, he shares “What we typically call love is often the start of love.”

The journey of love, or “course of love” as it is called continues and Rabih and Kirsten marry while Botton suggests “We believe we are seeking happiness in love, but what we are really after is familiarity.” He at regular intervals throughout the novel offers pointed assertions about love, and even if we as readers don’t accept them entirely or even at all, they certainly offer much contemplation and pondering.

Through children and infidelity, as well as career rises and falls, dual incomes and economic balance and imbalance, Rabih and Kirsten’s life together is revealed to the reader. And along the way, we as readers are asked to look within, to question how we see or what we expect from romantic pairings. And it is in one swift, but profound statement that I found most ripe with wisdom as to apply to my own life: “Love is a skill, not just an enthusiasm.”  I couldn’t help but contemplate where the fault should be placed that made me assume that it didn’t need to involve skill. Botton suggest an answer as the novel nears its end, “The fault lies with art, not life. Rather than split up, we may need to tell ourselves more accurate stories —stories that don’t dwell so much on the beginning, that don’t promise us complete understanding, that strive to normalize our troubles and show us a melancholy yet hopeful path though the course of love.” 

Ah, the course of love. While it may never entirely run smoothly, it is certainly a course to become a better student of, if not only to improve our experience.

~Giveaway!!

If you are in any way curious about The Course of Love, I encourage you to read the book. And if you’d like to win a free copy, you are in luck as I am giving away a copy to a lucky reader/listener. Leave a comment below to enter by Saturday June 18th at midnight (pacific daylight time), and the winner will be chosen randomly. Make sure to include some way to contact you if you are the lucky winner.

~Share your #PetitPlaisir on Twitter or Instagram and Shannon may give you a shout-out on a future episode of The Simple Sophisticate. Tag @simplyluxurious on Twitter or @thesimplyluxuriouslife on Instagram with a picture of your Petit Plaisir.

~This week’s Petit Plaisir Shout-Out goes to London Dan with his pic of @BeanAboutTown cup of coffee. Thanks Dan!

Image: source

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Style Inspiration: Extra, Extra Summer Style

“And so with the sunshine and the great bursts of leaves growing on the trees, just as things grow in fast movies, I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer.” 

― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

A few days ago I was gently awoken by the chirping of birds. And as the sun began to rise around 5:20 in the morning, I was reminded why I love the long days. As someone who adores her mornings, being able to wake with daylight subtly whispering that the day is beginning is a priceless luxury that I do my best to revel in each season as it seems to vanish all too soon.

Something that also seems to have vanished that readers have said they would like to have returned is more fashion and style posts. As I mentioned in February, the reason for the changes in the regularly weekly posts was my schedule as I am determined to improve my French language skills and focus on finding time to curate the content for the second book. And the good news is that French courses have wrapped up, and more time is at my disposal. And while Style Inspiration won’t be returning weekly, I will be bringing back sporadic fashion posts seen on the street as well as home tours from time to time that I think you will enjoy having a look at.

The summer season for TSLL is a time for total dedication to all things simply luxurious, as I am already diving into two big projects, one of which will debut in the fall. I look forward to continuing to bring you inspiration on how to live the life you love and improve on what you already have worked so hard to cultivate whether it involves the meals you make in your kitchen, the outfits you pull together, how to entertain on a budget and overall provide tips and tools to reach your full potential as the amazing individual that you are.

With all of that said, it is a beautiful sunny Sunday, and so some delightfully fun and summer style to enjoy is below. To learn more about each of the outfits, simply click on the image to be taken to the original destination to shop or learn more about the the styles. Enjoy!

 

Images: (1) all others, simply click on the images

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This & That: No. 213

Book
—The Assistants by Camille Perri

Another fantastic summer read to indulge in. Light, fun, set in New York City and starring a millennial trying to figure life out, this genre is a constant mainstay for every generation as each make their way through their twenties, try to apply the lessons in their thirties and realize while it won’t be easy, it is worth trying to figure it all out instead of simply going along.

—The Career Code: Must-Know Rules for a Strategic, Stylish and Self-Made Career by Hillary Kerr and Katherine Power

Released last month, the founders of the über successful fashion and style website WhoWhatWear appear to have another best-selling book on their hands. With pinpoint specific advice on how to negotiate when it comes to your salary, how to tactfully leave and move on to your next job as well as 20 different lifehacks tips to help you find balance with your personal life, if you are looking for career guidance as you build the life of your dreams, you may just want to pick up this book.

—The Curious Charms of Arthur Pepper by Phaedra Patrick

Now this looks like a delightful book. Recently widowed, Arthur Pepper loves his simple daily routines and even has a lovely name for his fern: Frederica. But on the anniversary of his beloved wife’s death, he sets out on an adventure that leads him to London, Paris and India. It is an adventure of self-discovery, and in many ways makes me think that it may be The Alchemist but with a gentleman of a certain age this time leading the foray into destinations and realizations unknown. Released just last month, it is the author’s debut and she may have just started with a brilliant bang.

Decor
—Brooklyn Interiors by Kathleen Hackett

Having had the chance to flip through this book in the comfort of my home, three homes especially stood out Anne O’Zavelo’s, Robert Highsmith & Stefanie Brechbuehler’s and Victoria & Nick Sullivan’s. The beauty that many Brooklyn homes offer is what I love about Parisian apartments: high ceilings, tall, expansive windows, and oodles of character. If you are drawn to what is transpiring in Brooklyn, you will enjoy this book.

Film
—Genius

Based on A. Scott Berg’s National Book Award winning book Max Perkins: Editor of Genius published in 1978, Colin Firth stars as Thomas Wolfe’s (Jude Law) editor who has worked with Hemingway and Fitzgerald during the peak of their careers. Wolfe’s “genius” is captured through the relationship with his editor, as they struggle and succeed to publish the works that are anything but short, but certainly brilliant. Being released today, have a look at the trailer below.

Shopping
—

Farmers’ market season has begun here in Bend as captured below a few days ago, and many people from time to time who don’t already have their market basket of choice, always ask for recommendations of where to find them. While sometimes you can find them right at the market itself, I have found a destination online to select the ideal French-esque straw basket that speaks to you. With more than nine different styles available, be sure to peruse the selection .

— Me & Em classic Breton Tops

It is well into spring by now and summer is almost here. And because of this I wanted to share with you one of my favorite destinations for stocking up on quality cotton, yet not too spendy Breton tops in all different colors. Brought to international recognition by the Duchess of Cambridge, these tops are well-made, simple and less than $70. Me & Em – pick up your favorite boatneck or crew neck color today.

—Net-a-Porter Semi-Annual Sale

The semi-annual sale worth saving your pennies for has arrived. With designer items slashed up to 60% (Victoria Beckham denim, a Vanessa Seward dress, a Dolce & Gabbana scarf and more), be sure to take the time to see what is available. Below are a few items I have hand-picked.

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~the living room of the F. Scott Fitzgerald suite in the recently reopened Paris Ritz~

~recipe for Dark Chocolate Figs Marnier~

The Paris Ritz is back and open for business as of June 6th after four years of shuttering for improvement. As profiled in The New York Times, the 118 year old historic hotel underwent an impressive renovation, and now the doors are open. Whether you can or want to reserve a room, you certainly should at least have a drink in Bar Hemingway (named after Ernst in 1994) and take in the beautiful decor as well as the rich history. Enjoy a tour here.

Much like Ritz Paris, a touch-up is often a good idea to invest in from time to time. Whether it’s the way our furniture is arranged, the length or style of our hair, or maybe even the color, significant change can be symbolic of a shift we are feeling in our own life, in our own being. Consider today if you are deserving of commemorating a life shift with a visual renovation. It may have a more positively powerful effect on your movement forward than you ever thought possible. And along with being ready for change, we must be rested so we can think clearly. I do hope this weekend provides you with the rest and relaxation you need as we dive full-tilt ahead into June. Below are a few articles and posts you might enjoy, and until Monday, bonne journée!

~4 Ways to Stop Worrying and Take Charge of Your Life

~5 Habits to Ditch Now for a Super Successful Future

~15 Things to Do When You’re Feeling Stressed

~Find a Dress that Is Made For Your Body with This Guide

~Katherine Power’s beautiful home tour as spotlighted on Habitually Chic

~How to Stop Dwelling on the Life You Could Be Living

 

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What I’ve Learned in French Class So Far: Part Deux

J’ai beaucoup appris, mais j’ai beaucoup plus à apprendre. (I have learned much, but I have a much more to learn.) After two quarters of French, upon reflection, while at times I felt like I was stuck in the proverbial new language mud, I know my ignorance has thankfully been diminished, albeit maybe only a smidge, but still my affection for the language that has captured my attention for decades has undoubtedly been amplified. However, in reaching this realization, I am more aware of all that there is to know. The many verb tenses, the subtle contextual hints that determine what word is being used, and the nuances that make the art of French conversation a skill unto itself have revealed themselves and I am determined to keep the flame of learning burning.

At the end of last quarter in March, I shared 15 things I had learned in French class so far, and many readers commented, shared their experiences and suggestions. All of which I wholeheartedly appreciated and I have a feeling many other French language learners did as well. And so with the second quarter having wrapped up this past Monday, the final handed to my professor and the summer beginning leaving me to my own devices to continue to learn and improve, I wanted to share 12 new things I have learned over the past three months about the how to learn the language steadily, how to learn anything and how to integrate the learning forever into your everyday routine.

What I’ve learned so far . . .

1. Coffee Break French is a great walking companion

Currently I am on lesson 23, just beginning the second unit, and in the short 15-17 minute lessons, I am able to pick up a handful of vocabulary terms as well as practice phrases for conversation without being overwhelmed. I highly recommend this free app (and they have an accompanying website for more practice as well).

2. Print out recipes in French

A few weeks ago, I did this for the first time, and while it was challenging, I loved discovering simple verbs that I know I would use in conversation if I only knew them such as cuire (to cook) and tranche (to slice). Much like investing in something we’re passionate about, learning a language becomes easier when we are integrating the learning process with what we love doing naturally. For me, that is definitely cooking.

3. When you do what you love in the language you want to learn, it’s easier to pick it up more quickly. So I find myself watching more romantic comedies in French. These are just a few I have enjoyed recently: Barbeque, Haute Cuisine, Sex, Love & Therapy, What’s in a Name? and Le Chef (all available on Netflix). I am beyond eager to watch A Chance Encounter which will be released in the next few days on iTunes.

4.Listening to Journal en français facile on RFI (Radio France International) each morning is a simple way for the newsie that I am to improve my ability to hear French (they provide a  transcript as well).

5. Wanting to continue my weakest area, conversation, I am considering using  iTalki to hire a French tutor to practice regular with during the summer. (Has anyone had experience with this? Please do share!)

6. Stopping into the weekly Parlez Français à Bend for conversation from time to time at a local restaurant is a great way to find people with the same passion.

7. After reading Flirting with French, I am going to be labeling a room a week with sticky notes in French (repetition, repetition, repetition).

8. Reading French regularly in a current context medium provides context clues to help improve vocabulary and recognition. I will be stopping by online French newspapers and magazines such as:

News: Le Figaro, Le Monde, L’Officiel, Le Point  Fashion: Vogue Paris, Elle, Literary:  Le Magazine Littéraire, Culture & Celebrity News: L’Express: Culture, Paris Match, 

9. Just because I didn’t know something on a test didn’t mean I couldn’t learn it. It simply meant I wasn’t prepared. We can all learn something new when we have the information available, the time to study and the proper tools to make the learning as simple as possible. Make learning a priority, seek out tools and strategies that work with you and your learning tendencies and you will continue to make progress toward your goal.

10. Switching my phone’s keyboard to Français is a simple way to be exposed to the language in everyday activities. For iPhone users, click here to find out how; for Android users, click here.

11. It all comes down to practice. Short term memory is great for success on tests and exams, but if I want the language imbedded in my mind, I have to practice it enough to plant it in my long-term memory. It took me four different walks and six times of listening to the Coffee Break French lesson (#12) on numbers 11-1,000 in order to implant the automatic memory of the numbers into my mind. I felt like an elementary student, but I honestly had never been taught them or, more importantly, taken the time to truly memorize them. Needless to say, it was the constant practice that made the difference.

12. Reading books in English about the French culture adds more depth and understanding. At the moment, I am reading The Bonjour Effect which I mentioned in last Friday’s This & That. So far, I am absolutely enthralled as it is breaking down the French’s approach to what to say, when to say it and why. All of which adds an intriguing new layer to the language I already am intrigued with. Discover more books about French that I highly recommend and reread constantly here.

And the journey truly has just begun, and what a wonderful journey it has been so far. I can only imagine the doors and adventures it will open up in the future. Please do continue to join me as I share along the way what I discover and find helpful as I stumble and succeed with the language of Simone de Beauvoir, Juliette Binoche, Claude Monet, and Coco Chanel, just to name a few historic and contemporary figures of inspiration.

 

~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~What I’ve Learned in French Class So Far: Part Une

~Why Not . . . Indulge Your Inner Francophile?

~10 Ways to Unearth Your Inner Francophile

~All French TSLL posts, recommendations and everything French, click here

 

 

Image: source

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10 Tools Fulfilled People Utilize in Their Lives to Squash Negativity

“When we know who we are, we can overcome our fears and insecurities. We surpass our smaller selves who suffer the slings and arrows of our conditioned reality, and we move to the unconditional truth of our larger selves. The answers to the questions of what to say, what to do, whom to let in, and whom to keep out become a clear and simple matter of listening to our hearts. That inner voice helps us align with our purpose, because each of us has a purpose, even if we judge it to be insignificant. The voice is there. We just need to listen to it. When we do that, we live in fearlessness.” —Arianna Huffington from her book On Becoming Fearless . . . in Love, Work and Life

~The Simple Sophisticate, episode #106

Fearlessness, not being intimidated by a life in which tomorrow or the future is unknown, is inspiring advice to give, but it is a hard approach to embrace as the doer of being fearless.   In fact, being brave becomes ever harder when we’ve had a bad day, when our energy is low and when we’ve been presented with something we mightily want but due to our past lack of success are lacking the confidence to believe we can attain it.

As discussed in 2013, I shared 10 surefire ways to fix a bad day, and today I’d like to take it one step further. What if that bad day or moment is prompted by what is dancing around in your mind? What if you’re having a hard time being fearless, even if you know you should? What if you are typically a very optimistic, hopeful person, but for some reason, on this particular topic or issue, you can’t seem to kick the negative head talk to the curb? Well, having been in this situation more than a few times, I’ve finally found tools that have enabled me to squash the negativity trying to pull me down and I cannot wait to share them with you.

First, let me begin by saying because we are all dynamic individuals, continually growing and stretching ourselves, trying new things and becoming better and improved versions of ourselves, we will never entirely rid our lives of negative thoughts that will pop up. But the difference is how we handle these moments when they arise. Here are 10 tools to help you squash negativity and continue living the fulfilling life you enjoy.

1. When you need love, give love

A simple formula that works. Not only does it shift the focus from feelings of momentary loneliness or lack, but it gives to those to enable them to feel what you know is truly uplifting and heart-warming. The giving can be to anyone, but it is something that improves their lives, no matter how small, reminds them of how special they are or merely gives them a boost of reassurance. Perhaps it is a phone call to catch up with a friend from a distance, or maybe a card to let someone know you are thinking of them. Better yet, plan on doing something with someone that they have been wanting to do. Making time for people is one of the most powerful gestures of love because when we feel lonely, it is what we crave from those whose company we enjoy. In other words, flip the scenario on its head and give what you desire.

2. Shift your focus

It can be easy when we have free time on our hands to grumble about what isn’t going well. But in those moments, think of the fact that you have free time. Why do you have free time? So many things are going well to afford you the ability to have free time: a clean house, a house, good health, food in the kitchen, a clear mind, good weather, loved ones in good health, etc. Perhaps at the moment a few things aren’t going as you had hoped, maybe in love, work or everyday routines, but rather than focusing on what you are lacking why not, as Arianna Huffington suggests “approach our lives . . . with fearlessness and trust.” Trust that you are in the middle of the journey and need to keep on moving forward for it to fall together. If you remain stagnant and grumble about what you don’t have, you will never attain it. Move forward, exercise fearlessness and trust that your journey is headed in the right direction.

3. Dive into what you love

One of the best things I ever made a regular habit of was diving into what I loved. In fact, TSLL blog came about because I was not satisfied with the quality of my days, and so I dove into where my curiosities resided. I have never looked back. Sure, sometimes I have to remind myself of this self-taught lesson, but when I sit down to write, to explore, go on walks with my dogs, capture pictures of scenes that bring a smile to my face, play in the kitchen, play in the garden or attempt anything for the first time that tickles my curiosity, I am present. I am in the moment and I have no time to let my negativity grab hold.

4. Remind yourself of what went well

In Martin E.P. Seligman’s book Flourish he discusses the psychology behind fixating on what is going wrong versus what is going well. For evolutionary reasons, he reminds us that our ancestors prepared for disaster, of which there were many, were more likely to survive than those who sat basking in the sunshine. However, in our modern world, we take the worrying too far. But this worrying can be fixed by honing a skill that will reduce our habit of jumping on the worry wagon. Simply write in your journal each night three things that went well. Try to stick to this for one whole week, and in time this will become a habit, a positive habit that will reinforce the observation of what is going well more often than what is going badly.

5. Re-examing your well-being

Often our mind slips into the negative when we haven’t been tending to our well-being as much as we should have. What is our well-being? Simplistically, it is “the state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy”. It involves many different arenas of our lives: mental, physical, social, emotional, personal and professional. It is our ability to reach the top of Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs, to be self-actualized (as we talked about in-depth in this post/podcast episode – #25). It is a combination of many different aspects such as feeling satisfied with your overall life, feeling a sense of accomplishment or having a satisfying direction in your life, being involved in healthy, happy, supportive relationships, feeling engaged in your life – community, neighborhood and the world, tending to your health with your physical exercise, diet and mental strength. Sometimes, a slip or dip in one of these areas that has been strong in the past can make us doubt ourselves in other areas. The tricky part often if figuring out what needs attention, and then we must take the time to mend.

6. Indulge in a healthy way to release emotions

Emily V. Gordon in Super You: Release Your Inner Superhero recognizes that sometimes there will be moments in our lives when we have built up emotions, and we must get them out. Sometimes these are just emotions that while we know how to fix what ails us, we still have to release the frustration. The key is to indulge in an activity that is not relationship-damaging or self-destructive. Each one of us will have different releases, but find a few ways that work for you. Maybe you just need to cry-it-out. Turn on the tear-jerker movie. Maybe it is an intense cross-fit class or squashing garlic with your knife and fist. Garlic-butter anyone? The underlying key for this to be successful, is that you must know why you are feeling emotional. And when you are engaged in this healthy practice of releasing these emotions, Gordon reminds, say the reason outloud (or if in a class, under your breath). Maybe your mother-in-law stepped on your toes one too many times, and even though you stood up for yourself and things are going in the right direction, you just need to let off some steam. Or maybe your fifth first-date of the year didn’t pan out, get this frustration out. While no, there is nothing you can do about the fact, you can release your negative energy so that you don’t inflict unnecessary damage on yourself or anyone you love.

7. Exercise

Speaking of a fantastic release, sometimes our negativity builds up because we haven’t given it a way to release itself. And regular exercise is a great way to eradicate the “yuck” from your day. It sometimes isn’t anything of importance or anything to talk about, but sweating it out let’s it roll off our shoulders that much easier. When we’re working out, we’re too busy focused on the moment, and when we’re done, we’re exhausted and our minds want nothing more than to relax. In other words, use your energy in positive outlets. Your abs, arms, legs and heart will thank you.

8. A good night’s sleep

Equally important each and every night is a good night’s sleep. Your mind needs to be recharged, it needs to be reenergized so that it can think clearly, and when we give it the 7-9 hours of sleep it needs, we are less likely to get in our own way. On the flip side, when we are not rested, worrying is easier because we’re not thinking clearly, we’re not able to ward off negativity and we are more apt to fall prey to mind manipulations.

9. See a therapist

For many years I have wanted to see a therapist or a counselor as a preventive tool. So when I finally found someone I was comfortable with and who understand my reason for scheduling sessions, I found it to be immensely beneficial. For some, going to a counselor is to show a sign of weakness, and whether you are going for assistance to fix an aspect of your life or as preventative means, you should never see an investment in your overall well-being as any way shape or form a flaw. In fact, it takes great strength to say, “Hey, I want to improve, and I know I cannot do everything or know everything. Perhaps an objective outsider can help me reach my full potential?”.

In fact, on my first session, I was giddy. Yes, you read that correctly, giddy! My counselor smiled, but it truly was me saying, I am here to continue to improve myself and make sense of my goals and better figure out how to make them a reality all the while assisting myself and getting out of my own way. As Emily V. Gordon of Super You shares, going to a counselor or therapist is a moment to focus entirely on you. And during those sessions when for the most part life is good, it is very much like a spa treatment. I could not agree more. Depending upon where you live, some countries make seeing a counselor very affordable (yeah! France! as Garance Doré shared on her podcast recently), but some do not (yep, America, we need to work on this), but without question, it is a tool that will work as well as you allow it, and it can absolutely be worth the investment.

10. Create and maintain rituals

Something we talk about often here on TSLL blog is the inclusion of rituals in your everyday routine (see below for links). From daily to weekly and even monthly as well as seasonally, rituals provide a moment of pleasure, as well as frees your mind, so you don’t have to create it out of thin air. Emily V. Gordon reiterates in order to have rituals that hold a powerful positive influence over our lives, keep them clear and simple and enact them regularly. So stick to your morning walk in the morning, sip that hot cup of tea in the evening and paint your toes on Sunday while watching your favorite reality shows, it will relax you and tend to your well-being all at the same time without breaking the bank.

~Afternoon Rituals & Routine

~The Benefit of Daily Rituals

Part of the inspiration for sharing today’s post/podcast episode was that I recognize from first-hand experience, sometimes we can get in a funk. It doesn’t mean our lives are going horribly, in fact, they may be going quite swimmingly, but sometimes we aren’t aware that our well-being is out of whack. And until we do recognize why we are feeling the way we are, we can get down on ourselves and our lives. The good news, now we all have the tools. Now we can use this as a checklist as we remind ourselves (1) we are human and negativity will creep in from time to time no matter how amazing our lives are, and (2) we know how to move past it quicker than in the past so that it doesn’t negatively effect ourselves or those we love unnecessarily.

~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~Why Not . . . Move Forward Successfully?

~How to Live Alone Well

~5 Ways to Live an Examined Life

Petit Plaisir

Sex, Love & Therapy (2014) aka Tu Veux Ou Tu Veux Pas (Do You Want It Or Not?)

~view on Amazon Prime here or purchase the DVD here

Patrick Bruel (What’s in a Name?) and Sophie Marceau from A Chance Encounter

Image: source

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