Shannon Ables's Blog, page 292

The Best Bakeries in Bend

Welcoming the weekend immediately assumes that stopping into a bakery will occur at some point over the course of the two days. Maybe that’s just me, but I have a feeling many of you enjoy this simple luxury as well. After all, it is the French that indulge in a croissant or a specialty bread on the weekends and remain disciplined during the week perhaps only stopping in for a fresh baguette, but nothing buttery and chocolate until the weekend. And with such talent making delicious treats to eat, it is hard to make an excuse not too. (Just stop in after your long weekend jaunt with your good friend or dogs. No guilt. None.)

As someone who thoroughly enjoys spending time in bakeries, patisseries or cafes whether to work on the blog, catch up on some reading or simply lounge with friends or my pups, finding a go-to bakery was a must on my list when I first arrived in Bend last summer as I began settling into my new home town.

Having had the opportunity to taste the buttery goodness of Paris’ croissants and pain au chocolat just to begin to whet your palette, I am nothing but particular when it comes to satiating my pastry cravings. And while I am still exploring the other food venues for dinner, lunch and and everything in between, if there is one thing that I am confident in recommending this early into my time here in Bend, it is bakeries.

As evidenced by more than a few an excessive amount of pics of the bakeries and the goodies they offer found on my Instagram, I have picked my top four bakeries in Bend that I recommend wholeheartedly and am confident you will enjoy depending upon what you are looking for. All are locally owned and two have two destinations to accommodate their booming popularity (each having one on the east and one on the west side of town).

What did I take into consideration when compiling my list? First, where do I spend most of my time? Where do I enjoy going based on the friendliness of the staff, the welcoming aesthetics of the decor and of course the quality and offerings of their goods. Having an accommodating space for pups as well was taken into consideration as Norman and Oscar are usually in tow as we sometimes stop in after a walk.

Okay, so below is the list, in no particular order.

Foxtail Bakeshop

My first experience tasting the talents of chef and owner Nickol Hayden-Cady’s pastries was when I attended a class offered through the Bite of Bend. Needless to say, I came home with four knock-your-socks-off recipes and a sugar high in all the right ways. Hayden-Cady has been in the pastry business for 15 years beginning with her training at the Culinary Institute of America, Hyde Park, New York. And when I discovered she worked at Papa Haydn’s in Portland, Oregon, for two years as their executive pastry chef and consultant, I was a convert if I hadn’t been one already.

(The story of Papa Haydn‘s: 13 years ago I lived on NW 23rd in Portland, one block up from Papa Haydn’s. Papa Haydn’s is renowned for their dessert offerings, and while I didn’t go out to dinner there but once, I would regularly pop in for a sweet dessert. My taste buds were always dancing.)

She is indeed a busy baker with a long list of weddings to bake for this summer and every summer I am sure, but when you pop in you will see why people recommend you stop in to her petite shop just off of Galveston (735 NW Columbia St.). The offerings are unique and full of an abundance of flavor (some images of pastries are below). The seating is primarily outside, but with the location being a side street, the traffic is minimal (but ideally close to the hustle and bustle of Galveston street which is busy with tourists) and there is shade for the pups. If you want her savory treats in the morning, be sure to get there early, as they go quickly. Hours of operation: Foxtail Bakeshop is OPEN: Wed-Sat 10am-5:30pm, Sun-Tues Closed (closed on Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s holidays)

~on the table, a lemon and lavender-infused cupcake with mascarpone frosting~

~the chocolate, caramel ganache tart in the center will make your eyes roll back in your head. It is amazing.~

~Norman and Oscar just hanging out, wondering why I am not sitting down and enjoying the lovely outdoor seating with them. “Blog work boys! Blog work that is imperative! People need to know where they can find a good bakery. Priorities!”~

~chef Cady with her Earl Grey Tea-Ra-Misu Tart~

 

 

Nancy P.’s Cafe & Bakery

As someone who has been visiting Bend since I was a young girl, my first visit without my parents to visit my aunt and uncle was almost twenty years ago, and I can vividly remember Nancy P’s Cafe and Bakery. The cozy house with an abundance of green foliage accessorizing the home. Needless to say, one of the first ventures I set out on when I moved here was to find this bakery. Priorities! And while the ownership has changed hands, the bakery is still top notch, just as I remember.

Nestled right off of Newport Ave (1054 NW Milwaukee Ave.) across the street from Newport Market, Nancy P’s is a delight to enjoy nibbling on their food and a hot cup of coffee whether you sit inside or out. If you are looking for classic American desserts (pies especially), frittatas, quiche, muffins, scones, brownies, bars, cookies, taken up to a whole other level of flavor and awesomeness, this is the bakery for you. In fact, their Apple Maple Pecan pie is a perfect example of classic meets exceptional flavor and creativity (see the pie below).

One of the first bakeries I visited when I was exploring Bend a couple of years ago, I can remember my entire experience vividly. From the mouth-watering quiche, perusing the local newspaper and sipping a warm cup of tea as the March weather was still quite chilly. As well, their baked doggie biscuits are something I will pick up for the boys as a special treat from time to time.

Speaking of the boys, sitting out on their patio, which has ample shade, is one of my favorite things to do in the summer. The petite birds that know where to find good food keep customers company with their chirps, and the dogs are easily accommodated as well.  Nancy P’s is OPEN: Monday – Saturday: 7 am – 3 pmSunday: 7 am – 2 pm

 

 

The Village Baker

Each bakery on my list has really found their niche in the bakery community here in Bend. And while all the bakeries (except Foxtail) bake bread, The Village Baker’s bread is at the top of my list. Each day they have a particular specialty bread and every day they have available the popular customer favorites. As well, their sandwiches and classic soups for winter are, well, pair anything with their bread and it’s going to be amazing, but truly, their turkey sandwich with strawberry salsa is my favorite (brie, turkey, strawberry salsa – Yum!). I’ve also heard their chicken salad sandwich is beyond-this-world delicious, but I have a very hard time not choosing my favorite, so let me know in the comments if you can speak to this.

This & That: No. 217

Book
—Thirty Chic Days: Practical Inspiration for a Beautiful Life by Fiona Ferris

I am absolutely ecstatic to share Thirty Chic Days. Fiona Ferris is a long-time blogger who I can remember following for quite some time. I am so excited that she now has a new book we can hold in our hands and enjoy. Released just this past May, it is exactly as it states on the title. Divided into 30 chapters, discover simple ways to bring Paris to you. For example, Day 1 – Have a Paris State of Mind Day, Day 2 – Have a Eat Real Food Day. To enjoy her musing and passion for the French way of living (she lives in Auckland, New Zealand), stop by her blog How to Be Chic. Congratulations Fiona!

—A Certain Age: A Novel by Beatriz Williams

Say the phrase Jazz Age and my ears perk up. Author of The Roaring Twenties and A Hundred Summers, Beatriz Williams writes a story full of romance, scandal and irresistible charm if you too are a fan of this intoxicating time in history. Set in New York City and Long Island (hum . . . does this remind you of another famous tale??), just released late last month, if the independence of the 1920s captures your attention, I think you will enjoy this novel.

—Siracusa by Delia Ephron

As a fervent fan of Nora Ephron’s equally talented sister Delia, I am excited to read her new work of fiction. As recommended in my list of 10 books to read this summer post, the story follows two couples on their trip to a small Italian island, Siracusa is told from two alternating points of view which allows the reader to understand each narrator’s perspective and feelings. It should be an intriguing tale on relationships and travel. Perfect summer reading. (Released on Tuesday July 12th).

—Winning Arguments: What Works and Doesn’t Work in Politics, the Bedroom, the Courtroom and the Classroom by Stanley Fish

As a rhetoric teacher I am certainly picking up Stanley Fish’s new book, but even as a layman, this book is certain to not only inform but entertain. In his previously successful book (New York Times best-seller), How to Write a Sentence, Fish displayed his prowess as a law and English professor. In his new book, released on Tuesday, he includes examples of arguments from cases of law, television, film, politics and even his own career to make the reader aware of what works and what doesn’t. I certainly cannot wait to read.

~Shop all of the books recommended on the weekly This & That post in TSLL Shop – here. 

Film
—The Secret Life of Pets

If nothing else, summer is about silly, fun, heart-warming films, and The Secret Life of Pets caught my attention. With great voice-overs by talents such as Jenny Slate, Kevin Hart, Louis C.K., Eric Stonestreet, Dana Carvey and Albert Brooks, just to mention a few, the film reveals to pet-owners what our beloved furry babies might do when we’re at work. You have no doubt seen the trailers, but if you haven’t, the trailer below will answer all of your questions. Enjoy starting today as it is now in theaters.

Podcast
— Note to Self

Sometimes, when I want to know what local news is making headlines around the country, I will tune in to other NPR stations on my phone. One of the stations I have favorited is WNYC which is where I learned about Note to Self. Discussing everyday dilemmas and solutions about how to effectively integrate the technology in our lives and generally how to live well, it was recently announced a new mini series will focus on Taking the Lead, spotlighting working women finding balance in their lives. Take a look at some of the topics that have already been discussed here.

Shopping
—Joie Kotahi silk navy stripe sleeveless blouse

Layering in summer is just as simple and necessary as winter, and so when I found Joie’s silk navy stripe sleeveless blouse, I wanted to share. Worn with or without a jacket, cardigan or long vest, this neutral top would make a great essential item in your summer capsule (and even your fall and spring) wardrobe.

—Tory Sport Tennis Outfit

Wimbledon wraps up this weekend, and so for those you who play and enjoy the game of tennis, I wanted to share a stylish, yet simple tennis outfit that I thought you might like. Tory Burch’s sport collection is full of chic, stylish items for whatever sport or active lifestyle you enjoy participating in (shop the entire store here). Her white and navy piped tunic top and matching side-slit skirt are what I think of when I think of tennis (okay, maybe again my Francophile leanings are getting the better of me as this outfit is also available in navy with white piping). But truly, how chic?

~recipe for Rhubarb Tarts with Pistachios, Berries & Shortbread Crust~

Wimbledon championship weekend.  I plan on savoring the finals, willing Serena Williams to her historic 22 major final victory and doing all that I can from my sofa to help Roger Federer get to one more Wimbledon final (at the time of this posting, he was in the semifinals). The weather here in Bend somewhat reminds me of England . . . well, sort of. It’s cool and rain is falling and is expected to fall intermittently throughout the weekend. I cannot think of a better way to enjoy the final matches.

Okay, enough about tennis for a moment. The blog is running strong this week with recipes, style inspiration, the return of Outfit of the Week, posts about love and summer and now a simple way to be a bit more organized (did you know if you are a subscriber to TSLL newsletter, you received a special discount this week only? Become a subscriber here). It has been an absolutely treat to be blogging full time and then some, and I want to thank you for taking the time to stop by and say hello. I hope you have a wonderful weekend, and until Monday, bonne journée! (Below are a few articles I think you might enjoy.)

~If you like me are trying to figure out this thing called life, read Your Life is Tetris. Stop Play It Like Chess. Mind-blowingly simple shift of analogy. Brilliant!

~51 Things to Not Do to be Better Off Financially . . . some you will already know about, and some you will not and you will be glad you now do

~10 Daily Habits That Will Radically Improve Your Life . . . it is all about the daily things we do everyday

~Want to be memorable for all of the right reasons? Read this.

~The brain needs a workout too! Discover 6 Habits to Boost Your Mental Health

~7 Steps to Develop Unshakeable Belief in Yourself . . . common sense that we often forget

~Have you found your calling? Want to know how or be reassured that yes, you have indeed found it? Read 7 Lessons for Finding the Work You Were Meant to Do

The post This & That: No. 217 appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

Outfit of the Week: Summer Linen Chic

Style inspiration can truly be found everywhere, and so was the case when I observed one of my friends who attended my dinner party wearing an outfit that to me epitomized summer chic: white linen trousers. The key is to purchase quality pants so they are opaque and to tend to the length depending upon the sandals you have chosen (the pants should just barely not skim the floor). Then add the necessary accessories: a simple necklace to dress the v-neck skin shown, treat yourself to a decadent pedicure, a medium to small size handbag and enjoy whatever summer activities you have planned.

Shop the Outfit and more below:

~Ann Taylor Linen Blend Wide Leg Pants (ivory) or Joie wide-leg white linen pant~

~Madewell Caron Callahan Cerise Tie top in black (check out the back)~

~Ann Demeulemeester ‘Saheele’ black long-sleeve knit top~

~M. Gemi ‘Novanta’ black sandal~

~Nashelle pure then curved necklace~

~Banana Republic Italian leather tote (other colors), on sale~

Turn on your JavaScript to view content

The post Outfit of the Week: Summer Linen Chic appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

Why Not . . . Stop the Pursuit?

“It’s really I think a new form of oppression for the women. Because it’s a complete bind and a double message. Go out, do what you want. Accomplish. Achieve. Be a success. Actualize yourself. Be a professional. Be independent. Find a man. Find a man. Find a man. And unless you find a man, there is a hole in your life. There is a hole in you. I really think this is on a cultural and political level, it’s a backlash on women. In a pernicious way because it doesn’t state it.” —Esther Perel, best-selling author on relationships, psychothereapist and TED Talk speaker

One of the most popular topics readers email me about is . . . not relationships, romantic relationships that is. Now that may be because I am rather private about this part of my life which is one of the aspects of living simply luxuriously and therefore my personal stories and tales of love aren’t shared, but what I have also discovered is that many of you too have discovered something I want to talk about today regarding love, more often than not, when we pursue it, it flees.

However, that is too simple. And so even though I don’t receive a lot of emails about romance, I think there are many that may want to ask, but do not, questions about this part of living a full life: love, romance, why is it is so . . .  confusing and should I be thinking about it this much?

I was listening to Garance Doré’s podcast a couple of weeks ago as she was interviewing psychotherapist Esther Perel on the topic of her successful book and TED Talk Mating in Captivity, and I immediately wanted to address the topic of love and relationships here on TSLL.

The quote above was shared at the end of their interview, and I highly recommend you listen to the entire 60 minute conversation as they cover a wide array of topics from relationships, how men and women get along, as well as a comparison of men and women’s relationships in the United States versus in Europe. In particular this part of the conversation, for me, was absolutely fascinating.

But most significantly this quote prompted me to address something that has been on my mind for the past year. A common question I would receive from those who learned I was moving to Bend, but most were not from Bend themselves, would ask or I should say state, “It will be so much easier to find someone in Bend (implying a romantic pairing, even though I was not actually close to any of these people for them to know the workings of my dating life” or after having arrived, the question “Have you found someone yet?”.

Now, while I know they meant well, and I clearly came to understand that they are equating happiness with finding a romantic partner and merely want me to be happy based on their definition, if you are a long-term reader of TSLL blog, you know this is not a “You complete me” site. Rather it is a “I complete me” site. No, there is no Jerry Maguire story-line going on here.

My response was and is, no, I moved to Bend because I fell in love with Bend: the lifestyle, the contentment it allowed me to foster in my everyday life, and thus I fell in love even more deeply with my life and the people, the entire community I am building and feel fortunate to be a part of.

Some people understand this, some people don’t, and maybe I am ignorant to the mind-blowing bliss that is awaiting me should I find myself in a romantic relationship that blows my mind, but I would argue, when you truly fall in love with your life, that . . . that is a truly mind-blowing experience and I wish each and every one of you have the opportunity to experience for yourselves. Should, as Esther Perel states in a quote shared below, you have a romantic partnership, it will undoubtedly add to the quality of your life if indeed you are in a place to appreciate and understand how to foster and attend to it.

So today, let’s talk about what we should stop doing and what we should start doing when it comes to love and romantic partnerships, and by so doing improve the quality of our everyday lives and invite even more love and contentment into our lives than we ever thought possible.

1.STOP shopping for your partner and START building a life you love.

Yep, I am going there. Online dating. Jamie Cat Callan speaks to this topic in her first book and a handful of articles in The Atlantic magazine discuss how online dating is becoming more common, but at the same time shifting many of our mores and affectedly dividing us even more. More to the point for me, it is the objectification that doesn’t sit well. I’d rather not shop for my partner like I shop for a pair of designer shoes during the fall sale season.

Instead of shopping, start building a life you love and you will begin to interact with and meet people with similar passions and curiosities. They may not be romantic pairings, but they will be people that see your authentic self, and not your resume online of what you are shopping for.

2. STOP looking for a fix and START fixing yourself.

“The better person you become, the better person you will attract.” —Anonymous

None of us will ever be perfect. No one who we enter into a partnership will be perfect, but what, when considering yourself, were you not pleased with in your past relationship (friendship or romantic)? Were you too quick to anger, jump to jealousy, not trust or understand why you were drawn to the wrong people, or needy people or emotionally withdrawn people? Whatever it was, be the detective that will help you understand yourself better. This may be something you can do on your own, or you may look to a counselor to help navigate what you don’t understand. Either way, take the time as it will pay dividends in all arenas of your life.

Part of relationships is learning to understand the person we are with, if they allow us in, but a very crucial component, is taking the time to understand ourselves. One of the best tools you can cultivate is to learn how to communicate well: respectfully, thoughtfully and clearly. We’ve talked about this a few times on the blog: the five love languages (come to understand yourself and your partner’s strongest forms of communication) as well as how to have a healthy, productive conversation with anyone.

3. STOP limiting yourself to one relationship that is worth investing in and START building a community of love, support and respect.

“I think we have been sold an ideal that your life is incomplete if you don’t have a romantic partner . . . but the people who are single with a solid group of friends are continuously still hoping and thinking this is the holy grail, that this is the thing that completes a life and I think that it creates a misguided hunger. I mean it’s an amazing experience. I am 31 years with the same guy. But my friendships, my relationship with my brother, my relationship with my parents . . .  I have a network of relationships that nurture me. [My romantic relationship] is an important one, but it is not the only one for sure.” —Esther Perel

At the beginning of 2016 an entire podcast episode of The Simple Sophisticate focused on the importance of strengthening our social well-being. Some of us will have many, some will have a handful, but the key is to build a social network, a community, that allows all of our needs to be met without relying on one person to be everything. First of all, this is an impossible responsibility to place on someone’s shoulders, and secondly, our lives need balance.

As Esther Perel speaks about in her interview with Garance Doré, if her husband becomes like a brother to her, in that she relies on him for everything, tell him everything, he becomes like family, and he can then not be her lover, her sexual partner, etc. It is healthy to realize what each of our relationships provide us with and not to expect more than they can give. So too, we must give what we can, and communicate clearly what we cannot. Each relationship, as you might imagine, will be different depending upon the individuals who are involved.

4. STOP having expectations and START stretching and realizing the vast possibilities that were never considered.

Let go of the script in your head of how it is supposed to go, how quickly a relationship must move along and just begin to make authentic connections with others. Set boundaries, but be open to new opportunities. Let yourself be curious, see what or whom you are drawn to, take your time and see where it leads you. This takes courage, but you do have this strength within you.

5. STOP seeking what someone can give you and START putting love out into the world. 

“If you would be loved, love, and be loveable.”―Benjamin Franklin

In Alain de Botton’s new book, The Course of Love, the main take-away for me (of which there were many) was, “Love is a skill, not just an enthusiasm.” If we wish to be loved, we must know how to love and be willing to love. As we know, it is not a one way street. And the love giving is not just to the person we hope will love us in return, but to all people. It must become how we live, how we go about life. And who wouldn’t want to be around such a person, even if only as a neighbor or an acquaintance?

6. STOP seeing being single as something to be fixed and START seeing life as the once in a lifetime opportunity to leave your legacy, improve the world, inspire someone to find their path or simply make their day brighter, easier or more enjoyable even for a moment.

7. STOP thinking about your biological clock and START diving deep into your life.

When we look at men versus women, the clear difference is a woman’s biological clock. I am not disregarding this, but often it is because we are so laser focused on what we think we need, on what we think must happen, we shut the door on unexpected opportunity. Loosen your grip on life, come to understand and be more at peace with uncertainty. It may just surprise you and open your eyes to a life of even more wonderful amazement.

8. STOP trying to be perfect and START being you, really you.

“Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself.” —Coco Chanel

Dig deep for your courage, begin to let go of what other’s may think and jump in to show the world who you really are. The followers, those who play it safe, have nothing unique to offer anyone else, but you, and me alike, have unique gifts, passions and talents that the world is hoping we find the courage to reveal. This is your magnet.

9. STOP looking to fill what are perceived to be the gaps in your life and START observing and expressing gratitude for all that is already in your life. 

I am just going to let Oprah be the teacher here: “The single greatest thing you can do to change your life today would be to start being grateful for what you have right now. And the more grateful you are, the more you get.”

There are many ways to live a fulfilling and contented life. Sometimes we begin to follow a path of how to live that is unconsciously someone or something else’s idea. And you have to ask yourself, if it doesn’t sit well with you, if something feels off, go back and start doing the nine things mentioned above and stop doing the former. Trust me, your anxiety will decrease, your everydays will become far more fulfilling and believe it or not you will become a beckon that attracts all sorts of amazing wonderful people into your world for potential friendships and romantic partnerships. Enjoy the journey rather than trying to control the outcome, and begin creating a life you are passionately in love with no matter what state your romantic life may be in on any given moment.

~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~What I Have Learned About Love So Far

~Making Connections

~The Right Ending Sending the Wrong Message?

Image: (1)

The post Why Not . . . Stop the Pursuit? appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

Style Inspiration: Denim & Simple Details

Summer-time, for that matter anytime, means denim-time, but denim can always be dressed up and even worn as the fashion elite do to the fashion weeks held around the world as seen above. How? It’s all about the details. From statement shoes, much like the Gucci suede loafers above, to the quality handbag, a beautiful scarf worn uniquely or with a beautiful silk blouse or colorful top, denim is the essential, foundational, casual meets stylish item to have in your closet.

From flares which help elongate the leg, to slim cropped denim, and even a ripped hem worn with an oversized classic white shirt (I found one for you – sure to shop below), the styles are endless. The key is to find one that flatters, slims and is comfortable. Have a look at some inspiration below. (And remember, simply click on the image to shop the entire outfit or be taken to the original source.)

 

SHOP SIMILAR ITEMS BELOW:

Turn on your JavaScript to view content

 

~STYLE INSPIRATION posts from the Archives:

~Summer Chic: 2016

~Loose & Chic

~Summer Work Chic 2014

The post Style Inspiration: Denim & Simple Details appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

The Best Learned Trait We Can Possess: Willpower

“Ultimately, self-control lets you relax because it removes stress and enables you to conserve willpower for the important challenges.” —Willpower: Recovering the Greatest Human Strength 
~The Simple Sophisticate, episode #110

Much like a tank of gas, when we wake up each morning (depending upon how well we have slept), our minds will contain a finite amount of willpower that will gradually be reduced, but never increased until we fuel it up again with rest and/or the proper food. Have you ever wondered why you are more quick to be annoyed or less able to hold your tongue at the end of the work day versus at the beginning of the day? Most likely, it is because your willpower has been reduced or weakened.

Willpower and self-control, are they the same thing? Yes, but what I find to be a good reminder in self-control, is that we hold the power. We can exercise this muscle which makes it easier to use it less often. What? How does that work?

Renowned and highly regarded social psychologist Roy F. Baumeister who co-authored the best-selling book Willpower: Recovering the Greatest Human Strength, discovered an unexpected paradox: People with more self-control don’t use it as often. In 2013 I wrote a post sharing the five primary benefits of possessing self-control. Based on Baumeister’s research, it is easier to have self-control when we keep our fuel levels of willpower as high as possible throughout the day. In other words, no unnecessary taxing or usages of fuel.

“When psychologists isolate the personal qualities that predict ‘positive outcomes’ in life, they consistently find two traits: intelligence and self-control. So far researchers haven’t learned how to permanently increase intelligence. But they have discovered, or at least rediscovered, how to improve self-control.” 

So how can we preserve as much willpower as possible throughout each of our days?

Be a planner. Stop procrastinating.
Play offense instead of defense. Preventative care and maintenance with your health, your home repairs, your beauty routines, your savings, etc.
Know your individual language. Become acutely in tune with yourself in order to recognize when you are either becoming more frustrated than normal, losing control of your impulses (eating, spending, sharing, etc.). And pull back before your depletion goes too far.
Maximize “low demand” time in your life. Find the times during the year, during the month, during the day when you have fewer demands, and then use this time to cultivate positive habits that put you on the offensive and help you reduce stress.
Make to-do lists. Become a planner in some capacity. Set goals and be clear about why you want to pursue them. Don’t set too many goals (3-5 depending upon the time period), and then make mini goals and discover the small steps it will take to get there. Ultimately, your daily to-do list will in some way be tied to your goals (grocery shop = improving your health; scheduling your seasonal facial = finding balance in your life and caring for yourself)
Get a full, rested night’s sleep each and every day.
Take care of your health.
Monitor yourself.  Let your jeans tell you to start limiting the desserts more often. Write down what you’ve done when it comes to progressing or regressing regarding your goals. Seeing it on paper or on a screen often catches us before things get out of hand, thus reducing excessive stress down the road.
Never say never. Don’t eliminate entirely all bread, but instead, allow yourself to have bread only if it’s fresh from an artisanal oven or only once a week. Set clear and simple parameters. Have the decision made ahead of time.
One option or nothing. If you’re going shopping, only spend the amount of cash you have in your wallet and do not allow credit cards or debit cards to be an option. Make the decision simple.
Include rewards. Building up your willpower/self-control will take time, so reward yourself for the progress you make along the way. If you adhered to the first week of your meditation schedule, reward yourself with a new song to meditate to downloaded from iTunes. The reward need not cost much or anything at all, but give yourself the motivation to keep going until the habit becomes ingrained.
Use your self-control to form daily habits that are beneficial. By doing so, you expend less energy in the long run.

The benefits of having strong willpower, as the quote at the top states generally, is the ability to create positive outcomes in our lives.

1. Improves our social relationships

When we can successfully monitor our impulses, we are less likely to say or do something without first considering the outcome and how others would feel or what might be gained or lost.

2. Compassion and altruistic nature increases

Because you are thinking about others while you are also experiencing your own pain or frustration, you are taking into consideration the pain and frustration that may be caused should you act on your impulse. Therefore, your perspective and understanding of others and the broader world expands which leads me to #3.

3. Attraction builds

A byproduct of exhibiting self-control is that we recognize and engage with others. And when we engage with others, we are showing them we are thinking of them. And one of the most basic human needs is to feel included, recognized and heard. Someone who exhibits willpower is better able to exude this energy because they are stepping outside of themselves and considering those around them.

4. Good health

A funny discovery when it came to willpower is that dieting doesn’t necessarily become easier with willpower. Why? Well, it takes willpower to not eat certain foods and temptation, but in order to have willpower, we must eat.

The good news found beneath this frustrating fact is that “diets” as coined by the American culture are not the solution. What is the solution is to understand food is required for good health without deprivation, and to do so moderately and by making wise decisions. In other words to go back up to the list of ways to increase your fuel levels, never say never. Don’t deprive yourself. Your body knows what it needs if you know the language of your body. If you don’t, this will take time, but you can become fluent in it. And when you do, you will know that when you are tired, tossing back another cup of coffee isn’t the answer. Rather a good night’s sleep is and firm boundaries need to be put down.

Part of the reason many of us reach for sugar when we need a high is (1) it’s readily available in our culture in pre-processed bags and goodies, etc., but (2) it appears to works (temporarily)! The key is to reach for the right type of food, because we clearly recognize we need fuel. Instead reach for protein which will last far longer and be healthier in the long run. And as for sugar, reach for natural sugars (click here to discover how to feed your body well). (Also, click here to discover how to lose those last 10 pounds.)

5. Strong willpower in one arena helps in the next arena

Every little practice of willpower helps. If you have a strong habit of turning down pop/soda, that ability (that strength) is applicable to be used (perhaps without you knowing it) when you attempt to strengthen your willpower in another area that will improve your life. Don’t be afraid to start small as it will be easier to establish small, simple habits. Once the habit has been formed, you don’t have to think about it any more and then you can apply that energy to the next habit you would like to add to your life.

6. Control of emotions

Now, don’t misunderstand, this is not about suppressing emotions, no, no, no. In fact, when you suppress your emotions you are using willpower, depleting your finite supply which makes you weaker when other decisions are presented. So, no, don’t suppress your emotions as that would absolutely be unhelpful. Instead we need to be aware of how we are feeling and knowing how to successfully address our emotions or communicate about them with others in such a way that is helpful, not hurtful.

7. Control of thoughts

We’ve talked here on TSLL and on the podcast endlessly about the power of mastering our minds, but doing so is hard when our willpower level is depleted. Again the key is to reduce our taxing of it so that we can recognize helpful or hurtful thoughts and shift gears onto more productive and uplifting images and ideas.

8. Improved performance

Whether at work or at home, when we are able to focus, we are better able to manage our time, manage or ignore distractions and think clearly about how to successfully do what needs to be done. Most importantly, we are able to finish what we set out to do. Willpower enables us to focus, enables us to complete, and complete well, the task at hand.

Is it any wonder that those with great amounts of self-control, i.e. willpower, live successful and contented lives. While we can always and should always pursue to increase our knowledge, our IQ is basically the same as when we were a child. We cannot radically change our intelligence, but we can radically change our willpower (which is a learned skill), and if we eliminate all of the unnecessary stressors, temptations, etc., we reduce the need to use it as often so that we can think freely and well to make the most of each and everyday. Whether we are pursuing a goal or strengthening relationships, willpower is the key.

~Shop all of the books mentioned, recommended and reviewed in TSLL Shop for Books, listed chronologically beginning with the most recent.

~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~9 Ways to Bring More Luck into Your Life

~10 Truths of Successful People

~11 Tips to Cultivate Good Habits

Petit Plaisir
~Carbonara Crostini – click here for the recipe

 

 

Image: source

The post The Best Learned Trait We Can Possess: Willpower appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

Pasta on the Grill? Sort of: Carbonara Crostini

Pasta will always be my comfort food, and especially Spaghetti alla Carbonara. And so it caught my attention in Bon Appétit‘s Grilling issue this past June when they shared “ImPasta” grilled crostini recipes. Simply remove the pasta, keep the other flavorful ingredients and place on a grilled slice of delicious freshly made bread. Brilliant! While they shared a recipe for another pasta dish with clams, they suggested carbonara, and so I gave myself a challenge.

After looking at my Spaghetti alla Carbonara recipe, I selected the key ingredients, eliminated the eggs and below is what I came up with. A wonderful appetizer, full of flavor, salt, fat and buttery goodness, your guests and you as well will feel spoiled and absolutely satiated. Oh, and don’t forget the glass of wine as well.

Carbonara Crostini

yields 4

Ingredients:

4 slices of rustic bread (Village Baker’s Strata loaf is perfect)
4 ounces of diced pancetta
1 cup of Parmigiano-Reggiano, shredded
1 sm-medium shallot, finely chopped
Italian parsley for topping
2 cloves of garlic
1 tablespoon olive oil

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit. (You can also toast the bread on your grill if you are inclined.)
In a skillet on low-medium heat, place the diced pancetta and olive oil in the pan before it is at full heat (this will help render more flavor from the pancetta). Add the shallots and 30 seconds before you remove the pancetta and shallots from the pan, add 1 clove of finely chopped garlic.
Slice the bread on the bias, and place on a parchment lined baking sheet. Rub each slice of bread with garlic. Drizzle with olive oil, and place in the oven for 5-7 minutes. You want to toast until just barely lightly brown.
Once you see the bread is toasted (ever so slightly), remove from the oven. Turn the oven to broil, top each slice with 1/4 cup of parmigiana-reggiano, and place back in the oven until the cheese is bubbly and melted.
Remove from the oven, top each slice with the shallot, pancetta and garlic mix. Sprinkle with finely chopped parsley and serve warm.
Enjoy!

 

The post Pasta on the Grill? Sort of: Carbonara Crostini appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

5 Simple Ways to Enjoy a Long Summer Weekend

For whatever reason, whenever a long weekend arrives on our calendar, there are many different leisurely activities to indulge in. In fact, it need not be a long weekend to enjoy these simple, indulgent pastimes. Below are just a few I have enjoyed this weekend as I have stepped away from Bend for a few days. Wishing you a lovely holiday if you are celebrating the Fourth of July and a lovely upcoming long weekend that you hopefully have in store around the corner in the weeks to come.

~find a hammock, take off your watch and enjoy a nap, get lost in a good book, simply relax~

~nibble on a sweet, cool treat. Click here to discover how to make the perfect ice cream sandwich~

~enjoy every meal of the day al fresco~

~read an inspiring book or listen to one on the long trek to your destination and back. This book has had my attention and was listened to and devoured on the journey to my destination this weekend. Take a look at my list of 10 Books to Enjoy this Summer and all of the most recent books shared on TSLL here. ~

~paddle board with the pups. Oscar doesn’t get the attention or credit he deserves, but he is the true paddle boarder in the family (see Norman on board here)~

 

Images: (0) (1) (2)  (3)

The post 5 Simple Ways to Enjoy a Long Summer Weekend appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

This & That: No. 216

Book
—All Summer Long: A Novel by Dorothea Benton Frank

A charming tale that invites readers to follow the journey of a New York couple who is making their plans of retiring to a quiet, more tranquil destination – Charleston, South Carolina. Olivia Ritchie, a highly regarded interior designer begins to have reservations while her English professor husband, a southern gentleman, couldn’t be more excited for the change. Join their journey this summer as they navigate a tremendous lifestyle shift in All Summer Long.

—Vinegar Girl by Anne Tyler

Taking Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shrew and bringing it into the 21st century, renowned and successful American author Anne Tyler works her magic in Vinegar Girl. With some critics seeing even more resemblance to a Jane Austen tale, the protagonist Kate Battista is struggling with her eccentric father at home and with the parents where she works at a preschool center. Needless to say, the tangles and drama ensue and while we may already think we know the ending, the playful approach by Tyler I have a feeling will be worth the read.

Francophile Find
—Every Frenchman Has One by Olivia de Havilland

In 1963 Academy Award winning actress Olivia de Havilland published Every Frenchman Has One chronicling her experience of moving to Paris to live with her French husband. You may remember her as Melanie in Gone with the Wind. It was a journey to adapt and learn the customs of her adopted country, and in her memoir she shares her struggles, her delights and her fascination with the City of Light. Now more than 60 years later, her memoir is being re-released and in this edition, an interview with the author herself who at the age of 99 continues to reside in Paris. Just released this past Tuesday, my copy arrived a few days ago, and I look forward to enjoying during the long weekend. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Outdoors
—Gardman Watering Can

A few weeks ago I was delighted to find a one gallon watering can that had a touch of personality without costing too much. Upon sharing my find on Instagram in the image below, I promised I would try to find its availability online, and I finally have. Well, I found many actually: a two gallon version, a forest green version and a antique copper version. And the one I purchased is here for less than $26.

Shopping
—Alvaro ankle-wrap sandals

Flat sandals for walking, touring and traveling are a must during the summer months. With quality leather, these ankle-wrap sandals are a pair to wear season after season.

—M. Gemi ‘Terzo’ wedge sandals 

Wedges scream summer when it comes to footwear. All ages can wear them and look fantastic, and they provide an immense amount of stability. But even better, Italian designer M. Gemi’s Terzo wedge sandals provide personality and a trendy touch. With navy, light brown and turquoise colors available, for less than $230, these will be a summer staple with your ankle pants, every dress or skirt as well as your Bermuda shorts. Enjoy!

—Preen Line Okie Skirt in Multi Stripe

Reduced by 40%, Preen’s striped pencil skirt is the ideal colorful print to pair with a basic black, white, blue, yellow or red blouse and make a chic statement without even trying. Available in all sizes at the moment, take a look and add to your capsule wardrobe.

~recipe for Prosciutto, Melon and Balsamic Vinegar Bruschetta~

And in the blink of an eye, June becomes July and the warmth seems to have become intensified. But with July’s arrival means the Paris fashion world comes alive as well with the Fall Haute Couture collections beginning on July 3rd and running through July 7th. Our last taste of runways until the fall, and I always indulge. As well, just yesterday, the Tour de France began which is always something to marvel at as they criss-cross the beautiful French countryside and villages.

Speaking of the French, be sure to take a look at this week’s Francophile Find as I think you will enjoy it. I know I already am and will continue to do so this week. With the long weekend beginning here in the states, the boys and I will be hopping in the car for a cross-state trek. So that means the audio books have been checked out from the library, the suitcase is packed and time spent with family and friends that I haven’t seen in quite some time will be enjoyed. I hope you too have wonderful weekend plans. Below to enjoy in your free time, a few articles, and until Monday, bonne journée!

~The Link Between Simple Living and Finding Your True Self

~How to Make Friends as an Adult

~5 Tips to Stop Obsessive Thinking

~6 Things Productive People Do Every Morning

~10 Lessons from Einstein . . . because why not . . . ?

~Remembering Legendary Times Fashion Photography Bill Cunningham

~A fantastic episode of Pardon My French podcast, Mating in Captivity with Esther Perel

Images: (2)

The post This & That: No. 216 appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.

A Necessary Detail in a Sanctuary

One detail that must be in a home I call a home eventually is a luxurious soaking tub, one with the appearance of regality and preferably a clawfoot or something similar. And so as I came across Jane Fonda’s master bathroom in her New Mexican ranch, I couldn’t help but dream of having such a tub again.

What I love about this space is the immense light, the fireplace and the exposed beams. Give me an evening after a long day, and I could easily lose all track of time. Featured in 2014 in Architectural Digest, read the entire interview here and tour the entire ranch here.

The post A Necessary Detail in a Sanctuary appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.