S.J. Warner's Blog, page 20

Haiku – Legs

Black net upon flesh

Gartered, seamed with heels

Dressed ready to thrill

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Picture also © S.J Warner 2014.)

Hunted

A feeling of foreboding

Shivers down the spine

Footsteps quicken

Bravery eroding

Lights seeming to fade

Shadows dancing

All around

As darkness replaces shade

The feeling of being hunted

Making the heart beat faster

Looking over shoulder

Demons soon to be confronted

Horrifying sounds

Of following steps

Metal running against high walls

Echoing all around

Mouth parched

Throat tightens

Enclosing the screams

That are desperate to be discharged

Cold hands and blade

Against flesh

The screaming realisation

That your life is just a trade

A pawn in the devil’s game

Your body a sacrifice

A vessel to be used

A toy the demon will claim

You’re nothing but a victim

Wrong place, wrong time

You wouldn’t be missed

Just another number in the system.

Korn – Falling Away From Me

@ S.J Warner 2014.

(Picture sourced from the internet).

Please Help Me

sjw2014:

Can all my friends and followers please help my fabulous friends son’s school by voting. It takes seconds and is completely free…how cool would it be if we could help this little school win this!

Thanks

Much love

S.J xxx

Originally posted on P J Bayliss:

This is the last place I thought I would be posting this update, but I really need your help today more than ever before.

For the past 3 years I have deliberately kept my personal identity completely separated from this profile as an author because it has caused me massive headaches in the past with my career. A friend told me that “It seems a shame to be living in shame” when I told him why I was keeping my two lives so completely separate, and he also said that one day I’d probably have to come out & reveal myself.

My name is Pete & I live in Pukekawa, New Zealand. It is a very small rural community situated south of Auckland on the other side of the Waikato River. The locals here are all farmers and small lifestyle block owners whose properties dapple the hills and windy roads…

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A Stolen Moment

A stolen moment

Between two perfect strangers

Their futures set by their enrolment

One final night

Before they must part

Fear tinged excitement before the fight

Soft kisses stolen

Behind blackout blinds

No words shared just looks filled with emotion

Tentative touches

And tender caresses

Soft candlelight hiding her blushes

A night filled with passion

Twelve hours of bliss

Shared with youthful enthusiasm

The pale light of dawn

Breaking their spell

A sadness coming with morn

A silent walk

Through war struck streets

Hands held no need to talk

One final kiss

Through the carriage window

A promise to write, to remember their bliss

Smoke billows around

As the train pulls away

A solo tear falls as her heart pounds

Her new found love

Away to war

Prayer for her man whispered to God above

Danger they would face

Both at home and away

They would soon meet again of that they had faith.

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Picture from Pinterest).

Her Secret Fantasy

Followed to the riverbank

Hidden in the trees

Sunlight perks through foliage dank

Her skirts pulled over her knees

She silently prayed he hadn’t seen

As her fingers made their way

Her thoughts of him so obscene

When she began to play

She watched the water travel

Down his sculptured chest

Her body beginning to unravel

As her hand caressed her breast

Eyes closed lost in fantasy

Of how he would hold her tight

To make her his with slow sensuality

All throughout the night

Her body gripped in fever

She never heard him near

Her fingers worked with passion so eager

As he watched her persevere

Until climax tore throughout

Her body contorting and writhing

As she held back her shout

Her body slowly reviving

When her vision became unblurred

Her gypsy prince of fantasy

Stood leant against a birch

The smile upon his face said he had witnessed her ecstasy

The skirts now used to hide her face

Embarrassed he had found

Moving silently from his place

His arms they wrapped around

Holding her against his chest

Carried her to his home

Her heart pounding against her breast

As he gently made her his own

The fantasy

She had held within

Had become reality

Games of flesh and pleasure were one’s they both would win

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Picture sourced from the internet).

Shadow Of The Past

The house

Empty for so long

The windows

Boarded and barred

The shingles

Unsound and falling

But upstairs

A shadow

The porch

Broken and decaying

The door

Swollen closed

The lock

Rusted and crumbling

The shadow

Watching and waiting

The garden

Overgrown and unkempt

The couple

Unexplainably drawn

The sale

Sorted rapidly

The shadow

Always watching

The work

Beginning quickly

The decay

Swept away

The house

Becoming a home

The shadow

Still waiting

The scents

Coming and going

The cold

Spots around the house

The moans

Cries and screams

The shadow

Biding it’s time

The terror

Of the night

The noises

Bumps and bangs

The fear

Of a house so loved

The shadow

Reaching for him

The discussion

The decision made

The history

Read and researched

The tears

For a woman unknown

The shadow

Trapped in grief

The room

Restored and renewed

The pictures

Discovered and framed

The love

For the past from the present

The shadow

Released from torment

The house

Again filled with love

Once more…

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Picture sourced from Pinterest).

Eyes On Me

Eyes on me

Little pet

Tonight will bring

Pleasure yet

Moments of wonder

Of passion

And joy

For little one

The best is

Yet to come

Feel safe

In my care

As I bind

And cuff

Secure in the

Knowledge

That your

Pleasure will come

Moments of

Ecstasy

Will be ours

But first

Let us play

For hours and hours

To the peak

I will take you

Over and over

Making you

Breathless

And begging

For release

But for now

Eyes on me

Little pet

Let tonight

Be our

Best yet.

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Picture sourced from Pinterest).

Snip Snip

Waiting patiently

Eager to please

her tools lined up

Ready to tease

her elegant scissors

His silver letter knife

Already she felt her shivers

And heat between thighs

He sat down to watch

A glint in His eye

And His hand on His crotch

Watching and waiting as her hand stroked her thigh

Scissors in hand

she begins her plan

Buttons on blouse

Removed to arouse

Snip, snip

Cotton parts

With each button

Exposing flesh

Above her heart

Snip, snip

Cotton slips

From shoulders

To floor

Exposing her flesh, bearing almost all

Scissors discarded

Knife taken up

The blade unguarded

As she began to cut

Skirt spilt

From hem to waist

With a flick

Fabric falls with slithering haste

Blade point moves

To in between breasts

Cold against flesh as it quickly removes

The delicate lace that covers chest

Nipples peak

As blade slips across

His arousal complete

And composure and resolve almost lost

her seductive smile

As blade slips down

her breathing wild

Pleasure unbound

Black lace tops

Shredded

Suspenders popped

Sensations leaving her light headed

Sweeping the silver

Beneath soaked lace

Again her body shivers

As she looks to His face

In seconds He was there

Knife in His grasp

Pausing to stare

As she shuddered and gasped

The look in his eye

Said so much

It was time to comply

And submit to His touch.

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Huge thanks to Master Black for supplying the picture).

From The Dark Into The Light

This is a piece I posted on my old blog, it’s an early piece of poetry that I was going to rewrite but as I read through it I realised that although it doesn’t rhyme it was perfect more or less perfect. I have made some changes, of course I was going to after all as a writer and poet I have evolved so much and now I know it is perfect.

It’s not my usual subject, in fact it’s quite personal but if one person reads and knows they are not alone then opening myself up again will be worth it.

Anyhow I’ll leave you to read,

Much love,

S.J xxx

You arrived

Late but you were here

Should have been

A joyous occasion

Instead was filled

With trepidation

Taken from me

So weak you see

So tiny, so sick

I was left

Alone to panic

While they worked on you

Finally taken to see you there

Lying there in intensive care

Funny to me you were tiny

And yet the biggest there

Tubes and wires seeming to come from everywhere

Making me so scared

Alone in my room

Hearing others cry

My heart shattered

As I worried

I was going to

Lose you

Watching you

Day after day

So many tests

Infections and more

Getting better

Before seeing you improve

Finally home

Everyone there

Wanting to love

And fuss

Yet all I wanted

Was to be alone

The days went by

All was good

But then…

A darkness fell

Deep inside

And I didn’t want to know

Didn’t want to hold

Didn’t feel any love

Didn’t know what

Was wrong

Was I evil?

A bad mum even?

I put in a good act

Didn’t talk

Not a soul did I tell

Worried if I did

They would remove

My other babies from my care

Daily life

Was a struggle

Funny I wanted to be alone

Yet I craved visitors

As they would want to hold

And love you

On and on I struggled

The darkness getting stronger

Then I broke

Couldn’t sleep

Wrote a note

Saying goodbye

But I couldn’t do it

So note was hide

Until he asked

What was wrong

And the truth tumbled

From my lips

Tears scalding

As I explained

I didn’t love you

Or even want you

That I thought your life

Would be better without me

I gave him

The note

Watching as

His heart broke

The hurt in his eyes

As he began to realise

Just what I was feeling

What I was going through

We talked

He explained

I wasn’t evil

That it was something I could change

That was when

The change began

With a lot of help

A lot of support

I could see a glimmer

A little hope

It was hard

Good days

And bad

But slowly

I could hold you

Could feel the love

Each day

I got better, got stronger

Then one day

You took your first step

And a miracle happened

My heart filled with love

Now you are the best thing ever

My little man, my ddyn bach

Yes I know I smother

You with love

Guess that’s my way of making

Up for time that I lost

You make me laugh

And smile so very much

Bet you get sick of all the photographs

I feel my heart

Will explode

Just spending time with you

Yes I feel guilty

Maybe I always will

Yes I wish I could

Turn back the clock

But then I wouldn’t want

Our relationship to change

I can’t thank people enough

For being there

For standing by me throughout

My darkest days

Yes I still struggle sometimes

But know I know how to handle the dark

Thank you too

For being you

So loving

So adorable

So forgiving

But mostly for being my little man.

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Picture sourced from Pinterest)

End note – if you have read this and are going through the same thing just know there is hope and some fantastic support out there. You are NOT alone and you are NOT a bad person. Gain strength from my words and find someone to talk to, your partner, a friend, your doctor doesn’t matter who just do NOT go through this alone.

If you think you know someone who is going through this support them, be the shoulder, give them strength but most of all take the time to listen.

Thank you for reading

S.J xxx

What To Do?

My head hurts

My heart is sore

I don’t know

If I can take much more

Guess it is true

Nice girls come last

Cause every time

My heart hurts fast

Maybe I should

Become a bitch

But then I would

Really hate that witch

Maybe I should

Stop caring as much

Stick my middle finger up

And not give a fuck

So what shall I do

I have no idea

Really wish I

Had a clue

Do I flip out

Lose control

Tell everyone

Just to go

Say bollocks to the world

Pretend I never heard

The hatred, the jealousy

The callous words that others hurl

Do I ignore the pain

From drama where no one wins

Ignore the way others pass the blame

Making others feel like hitting the gin

Or do I stay being me

The girl that gets hurt

Hoping that maybe one day

Nice girls will come first.

© S.J Warner 2014.

(Pictures sourced from Google).