Ruth Soukup's Blog, page 45

Be More Productive at Work

Ever wish there were more hours in the day? While none of us have the power to stop the clock, we each do have the ability to get more done by ramping up our productivity and working smarter, not harder. If you'd like to spend less time working and more time living, don't miss these 7 powerful strategies for maximizing your workday and getting more done!

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Keep Your Food Summer Safe

Nothing's better than summer....and nothing's worse than food poisoning from food that sat in the sun too long! Keep your food summer safe with these 8 essential food safety tips for the beach, picnics, the pool, and more!

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Brownie S’mores

We have a couple of amazing brownie recipes here at Living Well Spending Less, and yet each time we come up with a new one. We declare it the best!

And so it is with this, our newest brownie creation!

Not only are these brownies so rich, chocolatey and moist. They are used to make the most amazing S’more! These are not like the campfire S’mores of your youth these are amped up and absolutely delicious!

Here is what you need:

1 box Ghirardelli brownie mix
1 large egg
1/4 cup Godiva liqueur or 1/4 cup  plain coffee, cooled
1/3 cup vegetable oil or coconut oil
1 1/2 cups mini marshmallows
graham crackers

Step 1: Preheat oven to 325 degrees; mix brownie mix according to box instructions except replace the water with the Godiva liqueur.

Step 2: Pour brownie mix into a prepared pan.

Step 3: Bake brownies according to package instructions. 5 minutes before brownies are done top with mini marshmallows. Bake for remaining 5 minutes, or until marshmallows are golden.

Step 4: Let brownies cool on cooling rack.Separate graham crackers into even squares, set aside.

Step 6: Slice brownies, set aside then lay one graham cracker square on plate then top with brownie and add another graham cracker to top and enjoy!

Recipe note- If you do not like coconut flavor do not use coconut oil.

 

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Recipe: Brownie Smores

Summary: This classic campfire treat is re-vamped with a little twist that will please children young and old alike!

Ingredients

1 box Ghirardelli brownie mix
1  large egg
 1/4 cup Godiva liqueur or 1/4 cup  plain coffee, cooled
1/3 cup vegetable oil or coconut oil
1 1/2 cups mini marshmallows
graham crackers



Instructions

Preheat oven to 325 degrees; mix brownie mix according to box instructions except replace the water with the Godiva liqueur.
Pour brownie mix into a prepared pan.
Bake brownies according to package instructions. 5 minutes before brownies are done top with mini marshmallows. Bake for remaining 5 minutes, or until marshmallows are golden.
Let brownies cool on cooling rack. Separate graham crackers into even squares, set aside.
Slice brownies, set aside then lay one graham cracker square on plate then top with brownie and add another graham cracker to top and enjoy!

Preparation time: 5-7 minutes

Cooking time: 35 minute(s)

Number of servings (yield): 8-10

 

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Host the Best Backyard Parties

Summer parties are just the best, aren’t they?

Food, refreshing drinks, sunshine and a light breeze, games and laughter…

Backyard parties are casual, social and fun. Nothing formal, stuffy, expensive or stressful (you’re stressed enough!)—just easy, lazy, awesome summer socials! And outdoor parties are so much easier than indoors! Instead of fitting people in a small living room or a hot kitchen, you can spread out in the yard. Kids can run around and play and clean up is usually a breeze.

The great thing about backyard parties (besides the simplicity) is that you can have several over the course of the summer. They’re not major events that require extensive planning. In fact, the more casual you keep it, the more time you’ll have to socialize and enjoy yourself, which we all know is the BEST part of the party, right?

What’s Holding You Back?

We often feel like we can’t entertain in our backyards because everything isn’t “perfect.” Maybe our garden isn’t growing (IF there’s even a garden to be had). Maybe you didn’t have time to plant flowers this year or even mow the lawn.

Don’t let that stop you! You don’t need fancy surroundings or even lawn furniture to have an awesome backyard party. You deserve it!

So haul out a card table and fashion a few benches out of logs and planks, ask friends to bring their camping chairs, or spread out a few blankets for a picnic-style get-together. Small backyard? No problem! Move to the porch, grill out in the driveway, and hold a tailgate get-together with bag-toss and a baseball game playing on the radio. No yard at all? Head to the park!

The main idea is give yourself a chance to relax. Again: you deserve it! Allow yourself some time to chill out and adopt a summer mentality: easy, breezy, fun and enjoyable!

Here are 10 tips to host the BEST backyard parties to keep you and your friends enjoying yourselves all summer long!

1. Pick Your Backyard Party Theme

While it might seem like more of a hassle than it’s worth, I promise: choosing a theme for your backyard party actually makes party planning much easier. First of all, establishing a party theme helps you create your vision for the event, so you’re sure to see a boost in creativity as you work out all the fun little details! Plus, choosing a party theme will actually help you stay on budget because you’ll know exactly what you need to create the right atmosphere.

Try a great summer theme like lemonade, camping, beach party, tailgating, or New England crab boil. Is this a garden party for your book group or a baseball party for some rowdy sports fanatics? The outdoors and the season lend themselves to so many ideas. The sky’s the limit.

2. Decide on Your Attendees

Envision your backyard party. Who do you want to invite? Will there be kids? How old are they?

Once you’ve decided who’s invited, it’s always fun to make real invitations (everyone loves getting mail). If you don’t have time (as many of us busy moms certainly do NOT), sending out email invitations or simply texting or calling is just fine. For more formal parties, you’ll probably want to start planning a few weeks ahead, but impromptu gatherings of 8-10 friends can happen in just a day or two.

3. Plan a Simple Menu

Summer backyard parties aren’t heavy cooking events or formal dinner parties. People like to eat light in the summer, so don’t feel like you need to toil away in the kitchen and miss out on the whole get-together. Plan dishes that can be served cold or as part of buffet—pasta salads, bread and cheese platters, green salads, pickles, chips, fruit, and Mediterranean or Mexican dishes often work well. Try to keep side dishes simple and of the make-ahead variety.

If you or your spouse LOVES to grill, then by all means, grill! But don’t force someone to be the grill master (including yourself). It’s perfectly acceptable to make a slow-cooker main dish like taco filling, pulled pork or chicken, and simply use the grill to char up a few veggies or corn. Kabobs can be prepared and created ahead of time, and if you want to do hotdogs, hamburgers and standard grill fare, let guests keep an eye on their own burger. Provide a few vegetarian options if you have any non-meat-eaters in your midst (best to plan ahead just in case).

Dessert can be a simple ice cream with fresh berries, or frozen fruit pops. Everyone can snack on raw crudités and salsa or hummus instead of heavy chips and creamy sauces that don’t hold up in warm weather. Sugar snap peas, blanched green beans, cherry tomatoes, and pepper strips all make great items to round out the menu with ease. Choose food that’s kid-friendly and low-maintenance.

4. Create a Fun Beverage

If you’re trying to host on a budget, it can be a challenge to offer a full bar with beer, soda and juice. Instead, offer up a “signature” beverage like lemonade that can be “spiked” or doctored as preferred and water. It’s perfectly acceptable to ask people to BYOB if they prefer beer, wine, or a special beverage.

Put your drinks in fun pitchers, coolers, or a pretty beverage dispenser. Adding fresh herbs like mint or lemon balm or fresh fruit can make even water seem festive and fun. Use plastic drinkware outside. Who wants to spend a party fussing over broken glasses? Outdoors, accidents can happen!

5. Add Ambiance with Music & Lighting

Nothing sets the mood quite like music and lights. Suspend pretty paper lanterns from trees or use strings of lights around your porch or yard. Tiki torches can be a little dangerous with flames and running kids, but you can find cute lanterns that use batteries or solar-operated lights instead.

When you pick music for your party, go with songs with universal appeal—retro favorites, oldies, beach, and summer pop music. It can also be fun to try jazz or instrumental music with a nice beat. Keep music quiet enough to talk and hear conversation over (and keep your neighbors happy), but remember, music can make the party!

6. Go for Eclectic

When it comes to décor, outdoor parties are easy because you can really go Bohemian and funky. There’s no reason to worry about matching plates and table accessories. Jars can make cute vases and cups. Food can be served on a wooden cutting board or other flat surface. You don’t have to go for traditional serving ware!

Paper goods are always easier to clean up after, but if you’re concerned about waste (or cost), just bring out whatever mismatched dinnerware you have on hand. Outside, no one will notice or be concerned.

7. Get Playful!

Backyard parties are a great time to play games! Spray paint Twister dots or play giant tic-tac-toe on the lawn. Play Jenga with blocks or play yard games like bocce ball, croquet, or bag toss. There are so many options when it comes to kid’s outdoor games—tag, hide and seek, scavenger hunts, and more. Don’t forget to have a football or playground ball on hand in case your guests want to toss it around (especially if you have a large yard).

You can also try hosting a fun theme, such as swimming or water fights, or tacking up a sheet, renting a projector, and having an outdoor movie party. Even if you aren’t actually camping, feel free to start up a bonfire, roast marshmallows, and tell ghost stories.

8. Keep Pests Away

The least-awesome part of summer is dealing with bugs! Mosquitoes, ticks, and wasps can chase guests away and leave them uncomfortable. A few days before you hold your party, go around the yard and look for anything that needs to be attended to. Remove any areas with standing water (a breeding ground for mosquitoes) such as birdbaths or toys in the yard.

Burn citronella candles in your yard, starting a few hours before guests arrive, and offer bug spray to protect your guests. Similarly, also have some sunscreen on hand to keep your friends from getting burned. For kids’ parties, be sure to keep some icepacks stashed in the freezer, and Band-Aids on hand for any boo-boos.

9. Let Guests Know What to Expect

We’ve all gone to a party in heels and ended up aerating the lawn—or forgotten a jacket on a chilly summer night. Give your guests a heads up so they can plan accordingly. Remind guests it’s going to be an outdoor party and suggest they bring along swim gear; if you have a pool or hot tub, or to be prepared for a bonfire.

These little heads-ups beforehand can go a long way to ensure your guests arrive prepared and excited about what you plan to do for activities. You may also want to be prepared with a few extra pairs of flip-flops, towels, and a sweater in case guests forget some essentials for the party.

10. Offer Amenities

Most people don’t come to a party expecting a swag bag, of course, but it can be really nice and fun to send your guests home with a little something to remember the day. It doesn’t have to be expensive or extravagant—a drink cozy, some Polaroids from a photo booth, or a little potted herb or succulent can make great take-home treasures. For kids, an inflatable beach ball or some sunglasses, stickers, and a thank you note can be great!

Have a few takeout containers or boxes on hand, especially if you think you’d like to send home leftovers with your guests. If you’re hosting a potluck event, having smaller containers to pack up food can make a huge difference for guests who are hauling their casserole dish and crockpot back and forth.

Summer parties are just the best. They can be a great time to entertain friends and spend quality time making memories with those you love. Plan a few great summer get-togethers this year and play around—see what works best for you! You might find you love grilling out with friends or maybe you prefer to forgo a bonfire and enjoy ice cream under the stars instead of s’mores.

Summer’s all about possibilities and having new, great experiences with friends and family. Get your family together and host an easy backyard party today! What are you waiting for?!

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Budget Friendly Summer Programs

School is almost out for summer….

Wasn’t summer THE best when we were kids? It was for me! So much potential for new activities and outdoor fun!

Nowadays, as busy moms, summer can really throw us off our already-busy routine. We end up wracking our brains for activities to keep our kids learning, productive, and having fun—then we’re suddenly taking on the role of Camp Counselor and Activities Coordinator.

It’s fun, but it can be a bit MUCH!

Plus, summer program fees and expenses can definitely add up. Fast. Swimming lessons, baseball teams, day camps, arts programs—suddenly the entire summer budget is blown and the family hasn’t even made it on a road trip or vacation.

Fortunately, this common mom-dilemma is resolvable. It’s possible to find summer kids programs and activities that fit within your budget. Many camps and summer programs offer sliding scales, financial aid, and payment plans to help you stay within your budget and means this summer.

So never fear! Whether it’s summer camp, activities or lessons, your kids will have the best summer ever (and Mom might even sneak in some free time)!

1. Summer Camp: Day Camps and Sleep-away Camps

Summer camp is a ton of fun for kids and the great news is there are a number of discounts available, from early registration to multiple enrollments from one family to full-season discounts. Many summer camp programs offer scholarship options as well (although many applications need to be submitted in spring, so check well in advance)! Note that some churches offer overnight camp programs and wilderness experiences at deep discounts.

The American Camp Association website can help you search for nearly any type of camp anywhere in the country. Not only can you narrow down your search by type of camp, but you can also specify exactly how much you can afford, then narrow your options further.

Both Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts cost about $25/year for membership, plus additional (but usually affordable) fees for activities. Use the Girl Scouts website to find a Girl Scout Camp near you. The Girl Scouts organization believes that scouting should be accessible to all girls, so there is financial assistance available to families who qualify. Be aware that financial aid opportunities are independently determined by local Girl Scout councils and fundraising options can vary from troop to troop. Similarly, you can find a Boy Scout troop near you by searching from the Boy Scouts website. Camps, programs, and activity fees vary by local council.

2. Recreation Center Summer Programs

Your local community recreation center, town hall, and fairgrounds may also offer great and very affordable summer opportunities. Many recreation centers feature swimming classes, baseball teams, soccer camps, and more. (Plus, they also offer adult classes for Mom and Dad.) Cheaper than a gym or private lessons, these programs are usually community-focused and priced so all can attend.

Programs through Boys and Girls Clubs and your local YMCA and YWCA are often open to all with options to adjust fees based on income levels. These local recreation offerings are usually quite financially reasonable, and they may also offer a sliding scale and scholarship options—so be sure to ask. You can search for local programs through each respective website.

3. Church Activities & Programs

If you belong to a church with a strong youth presence, ask your Youth Leader or Youth Director for ideas. Some churches offer free hands-on summer fun, music lessons,vacation Bible school camps, service projects, and other activities that might really spark kids’ interests and make for a more meaningful summer.

Churches also offer summer sports leagues (that compete against other church teams) and they’re often cheaper than other organized kids’ sports leagues and teams. Church bulletin boards also typically include listings for in-home lessons, playgroups, and other affordable opportunities. Many scout troops also work through churches, too.

4. Learning Opportunities, Activities & Hotspots

Art museums, children’s museums, and science and discovery museums typically offer a myriad of children’s activities during the summer. While they often cater to camp programs visiting with large groups, they also offer small group classes at a discount as well.

If your kiddo has a favorite museum—the planetarium, aquarium, or botanical garden—see what they offer. Don’t miss local “free days” often available to residents. Don’t forget to check other places like local farms, horse ranches, and skate parks that might offer summer options, too. The library almost always offers wonderful free summer programs, reading groups, crafts, and storytelling events that all kids enjoy!

Additionally, schools offer a lot more than just academic programs and summer school. Teachers often host reading groups and summer challenges for kids who want to keep learning over the summer (a great way to keep kids at grade-level and avoid the “summer slide”). These summer programs are meant to be fun (after all, who wants to be in school all summer?)—so your kids won’t even know they’re learning while they play!

School sports programs sometimes run during the summer and some schools even have affiliated camps and extension activities that are hands-on and really fun. Many are included with tuition or financial aid is available, especially for kids who need an academic boost.

5. Local Daytrips & Activities for Kids

Of course, kids’ summer activities and opportunities vary by location. To find activities in your area, ask members of your local Nextdoor group or local Facebook group for ideas for affordable local kids’ summer programs.

It sounds funny, but ordering a free guidebook from your local Visitors’ Bureau can be an awesome resource! I was totally shocked at all the great stuff in mine. It was packed with excellent local ideas I’d never even thought of—right in town! In larger cities, look for your Visitors’ Bureau, but you may have to order your state’s guide if you live in a smaller town. Pick up the local paper and any free papers offered around town as well. There might be a wonderful surprise right around the corner!

Almost all zoos offer some type of summer program for kids, though it depends upon your local zoo. If you’re looking for free activities, some zoos offer free admission all year round and many offer free days for county residents on certain days of the year or month. Check with your local zoo.

Try local farms or local garden centers, as some offer day camps and opportunities to learn about plants and animals up close. Local farm camps are devoted to teaching kids about vegetable picking, organic farming, and more. Garden centers can be another great place to look, often offering tips on planting and discounted summer activities for kids. (Plus, just walking through—for free—over an afternoon can be a great way for kids to connect with nature.)

Check in with local pottery studios, paint-and-take spots, craft and paper stores, and theaters around town, which often offer affordable summer opportunities for kids. Also try your local skating rink and public swimming pool, as there are often special summer deals on lessons and activities to check out during the week. Many also offer package deals for frequent trips.

6. Seasonal Event Volunteering Opportunities

If your town hosts music in the park or fairs and festivals, they’re great opportunities to get older kids involved helping and volunteering. It’s almost always a free and it hardly seems like work! Check out 4H at school or ask about local community involvement and volunteering opportunities, like outdoor painting, flower arranging contests, and dance and music lessons.

Some towns hold all sorts of fairs and festivals—and kids are usually the focus, which means they’re free or very affordable, whether your child is volunteering or not. However, always ask if there are opportunities for kids to help leading up to the event, as well as ways to get involved during the festival as well. Your kids might decorate a float, play an instrument, or help out setting up different aspects of the festival!

7. Private Lessons & Groups

While perhaps not as social as camp or recreation clubs (and typically more expensive) private lessons and even group lessons are widely available for kids over the summer. If your child has their heart set on private lessons, gather a group of parents to see if you can get a group discount rate and alleviate some of the costs. Again, check local neighborhood groups and local library bulletin boards for listings.

Some kids are more comfortable with one-on-one lessons for things like swimming, archery, or skating. If your kid takes lessons or plays sports during the school year, summer classes are great for keeping up skills and getting ready for next season. Ask the coach or instructor what they offer during the summer months and if they’re willing to work with you on the price to keep up your child’s interest over the break (many are happy to continue work with good students, often at a discount).

If you and several other parents are looking for affordable options together, consider a rotating play/activity group or a babysitting co-op—each mom takes a day per week to play Activity Director. One mom might offer in-home computer classes while another might teach kids how to play badminton or bocce ball. Pool your resources and your skill sets and you’ve already created private lessons as well as a mini summer camp!

Summertime is great for programs, activities, and fun for every kid. It doesn’t have to be stressful or a financial burden—moms need a summer break, too! Keep your kiddos engaged and active on the cheap to ensure your family has a happy, memorable, and wonderful summer of saving!

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Oatmeal Craisin Cookies

This is a guest post from Sammi of Grounded & Surrounded

Cookies are one of my favorite gifts to give my friends and family. Baking homemade cookies is both a frugal gift idea and shows you care. Nothing says love like soft oatmeal cookies with dried cranberries and white chocolate chips woven throughout. These gluten-free cookies have the most amazing texture that can be attributed to the chewy oatmeal and sweet mix ins.

You can package these cookies several different ways to either give or keep for your own family to enjoy. My favorite way to package cookies is stacking them high in a slender cellophane bag and securing with a cute ribbon. Another cute option is presenting the cookies stacked in a wide mouth mason jar finished off with a small piece of cloth secured to the lid and a matching ribbon.

Here is what you need:

1 cup coconut oil, melted
1/2 cup coconut sugar
2 eggs
1 1/2 cups old-fashioned oats
1 1/2 cups gluten-free flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup dried cranberries
1 cup white chocolate chips

Step 1: Preheat oven to 350F. In a large bowl, whisk together melted coconut oil, coconut sugar, and eggs.

Step 2: To the large bowl, add dry oatmeal, & gluten-free flour, baking soda, salt, dried cranberries, and white chocolate chips. Mix gently until all ingredients are combined.

Step 3: Using a 2 Tbsp cookie dough scoop, place dough onto a parchment lined baking sheet.

Step 4: Bake cookies for 9-10 minutes or until cookies are just set and beginning to brown. Be careful not to over bake! Allow cookies to cool on a wire rack and store in an air-tight container.

 

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Recipe: Oatmeal Craisin Cookies

Summary: These gluten-free cookies have the most amazing texture that can be attributed to the chewy oatmeal and sweet mix ins.

Ingredients

1 cup coconut oil, melted
1/2 cup coconut sugar
2 eggs
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 cups old-fashioned oats
1 1/2 cups gluten-free flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup dried cranberries
1 cup white chocolate chips



Instructions

Preheat oven to 350F. In a large bowl, whisk together melted coconut oil, coconut sugar, and eggs.
To the large bowl, add dry oatmeal,  gluten-free flour, baking soda, salt, dried cranberries, and white chocolate chips. Mix gently until all ingredients are combined.
Using a 2 Tbsp cookie dough scoop, place dough onto a parchment lined baking sheet. Bake cookies for 9-10 minutes or until cookies are just set and beginning to brown. Be careful not to over bake! Allow cookies to cool on a wire rack and store in an air-tight container.

Preparation time: 5-7 minutes

Cooking time: 9-10 minute(s)

Number of servings (yield): 30 cookies

 

 

Sammi Ricke likes to keep things simple, delicious, and nutritious in her kitchen. She enjoys the challenge of finding unique ways to incorporate “just one more whole food” into every meal while leaving just enough room for life’s essentials: chocolate and peanut butter. If you are looking for “healthified” versions of your family’s favorite meals be sure to visit Sammi’s Grounded & Surrounded Blog. You can also find her on Pinterest, Instagram, and Facebook.

 

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Is Your Marriage Normal?

Marriage is SO easy.

Said no one, ever.

Ok, ok. Marriage is beautiful and amazing, and sometimes a really fun partnership. It’s a chance to spend your life with someone you care deeply about, and to take on big “life things” together like setting goals, buying a house, raising children, and exploring the world.

Marriage is also hard…and sometimes very hard.

How many of us struggle to get along with our spouse sometimes? How many of us feel like we can’t always get on the same page about intimacy, finances, the kids, or even what to eat for dinner?

It can leave us wondering. Does every marriage look like this? Or just mine? (Spoiler alert: we ALL go through this.)

Think back to your college roommate or a friend you lived with. Chances are, no matter how much you liked that person, there were still stressful times, right? And THAT was just for a semester or a year or two. Now multiply that by life, plus add in all the emotions of love and having kids together, and going through all kinds of highs and lows.

No wonder marriage can feel like a roller-coaster!

Then we see other couples sharing magazine-quality family photos on social media and talking about how romantic and strong their marriage is. We wonder if ours really adds up.

Truth is, we can’t compare our own marriage to other marriages. Every relationship is different. Everyone brings a different set of experiences, feelings, and personality traits to the table in their marriage. Essentially, it’s impossible to look at one marriage and say it’s normal and look at another marriage and say it’s not.

Yet, there are a few perfectly normal “marriage things” we ALL go through. So here’s how we can strengthen our bond with our spouse when we do.

1. You Argue About Finances

I’ve definitely been through this with my husband and I’m sure you probably have too. Maybe you’re a spender and he’s a saver or maybe the roles are reversed—you’re the thrifty one and he’s not so great with finances.

Money issues can be very stressful and many of us struggle with our finances. We struggle to curb our spending, save money, or stay on a budget. We’re often bringing our own personal financial history into our marriage, and we might have grown up in an environment where we had to worry (or watch our parents worry) about how to make ends meet. Or maybe your spouse grew up like that, but you grew up in a family full of abundance, so you aren’t used to counting pennies. It’s hard to let those feelings go.

What helps most? Talking about finances up front! Don’t wait until things get out of control or you’re so stressed out you become ashamed to share with your husband. Instead, calmly sit down together and go over your budget. Find ways to address each of your concerns and get them out in the open. If you need help starting your budget, there are plenty of resources out there, but the idea is to start getting it under control so it stops being a source of conflict.

2. You Enjoy Spending Time Alone

Do you ever worry you’re too much of a loner? Or do you feel guilty for taking time for yourself?

As moms, wives, and friends, our lives are FULL of connections and commitments. We might feel we have an overloaded social calendar, so just the thought of fitting in one more thing (even time with our husband) seems like too much.

We all have moments where we’d rather just soak in the tub and read a book by ourselves. It’s totally normal to enjoy spending time alone and even crave it, ESPECIALLY if you’re surrounded by your kids all day long. You might need a break just to gather your thoughts (or simply use the bathroom)!

Make time for yourself when you can truly soak up and enjoy it—but also pencil in some quality time with your spouse. So often, we try to pack in too many activities and to-do’s, leaving us burnt out and overwhelmed. Instead, try to find simple things you can do with your spouse to enjoy together, like a walk, a concert, or just a meal together one-on-one. Still, keep time open for YOU to enjoy time with yourself, too! If you’re happier, your marriage will be happier as well.

3. You Don’t Talk about Things (as Much as You’d Like)

All of us feel like this sometimes. It’s seems like we’re always talking about logistics and what we need to get done, but we’re never really TALKING about the big things like life goals, plans, and what’s important to us.

From my experience, women and men naturally have a pretty different set of communication patterns. Men can go on a boat or out on the golf course and spend hours together and barely talk about anything, whereas women get together and we talk like it’s our last chance for conversation ever. Sometimes men just don’t open up as much, but it doesn’t always mean they’re closed off.

If I say, “I’m fine,” it might mean a million different things. If a guy says, “I’m fine,” it’s likely he’s totally fine (or he really doesn’t want to talk about it). So it’s always important to take communication patters into consideration.

That said, spending time one-on-one when you can connect, talk, and enjoy each other’s company really does help with talking time. Schedule some one-on-one time to reconnect with your husband. Chances are, once the logistics of the day are put aside, he’ll open up a little more.

4. You Have Different Views on Big Things

None of us are exactly the same as our spouse. (How boring would it be if we were always on the same page? What would we talk about?)

They say opposites attract and this can even mean opposites on big important things like religion, politics, or disciplining the kids. These are big emotional issues that can leave us feeling upset, drained, and very stressed out.

The first thing to do is to try to empathize with your spouse and remember all the things you love about them, and why you were drawn to them in the first place. You might be surprised that some of those big things might have been the very things that first attracted you to them.

Our views on issues can change over time as well, so if your spouse has done a 180 on a big topic or if you’ve gone through major changes yourself, it can take a while to get on the same page or even in the same book. Give it time and understanding, and if things have become seemingly insurmountable, you may need to enlist the help of a professional to get back to a spot you can both feel good about. You might still have different views, but you can work together to appreciate where the other person is coming from.

5. You Like Different Things

This one’s not such a big deal, but it can definitely leave us feeling a little left out when our husband would rather hang out with his fantasy football buddies or wants to watch history documentaries (and you’d prefer ANYTHING else).

Guess what? Having your own interests can make your marriage even stronger! When you were first dating, you might have noticed all the commonalities you had with your spouse, but chances are, you also noticed your differences. Maybe they were really into video games or science fiction or sports. It made them more interesting to you and shaped them into who they are today.

Just like you need to make time to enjoy your personal “me time,” so does your husband. Give him a chance to do the things he enjoys, even if it doesn’t always mesh with your schedule. You don’t have to watch football or golf on Sunday afternoons, but maybe that’s a great time to do your Sunday prep for the week, while your guy has some sports time. It might NOT be the best time to schedule family photos or a trip to your parent’s house. Try to take each other’s interests and schedules into consideration.

6. Your Parenting Styles are Different

Parenting styles are a little different than views on discipline (which can be a heavier issue). Sometimes we might feel like the Regulator or the Rule Enforcer and we cringe a little when our husband is Permissive, Fun Dad.

It’s totally okay to have different styles of parenting. In fact, it’s very normal. Moms tend to be, well, “mommish” and dads tend to be the fun playtime, silly guy that gets the kids riled up. The kids will still be fine and you’ll still be just fine, even if they eat sugar cereal while you’re at your book club or they went to school in mismatched clothes while you were out of town.

The most important thing is that you communicate the whys and reasons behind your parenting styles and don’t sweat the small stuff. Most of the time, your differing parenting styles won’t have any long-term effects and the kids will be alright. It’s okay if Dad doesn’t do things the way Mom does and vice-versa.

7. You’re Less Intimate than You Used to Be

This one is so tough, isn’t it? We might feel like our body has changed since we had kids. Maybe we put on some extra pounds over the holidays and it’s not coming off. Consequently, we might feel less attractive and confident than we once did.

Combine feeling not-so-hot with general life stress—you barely get enough sleep, you’re worried about different things, you both have work stress, kid stress, financial stress, family stuff. Well, it doesn’t make anyone feel super sexy, does it? In fact, intimacy might feel like a distant memory.

As we get older, we just might experience some distance in our intimacy. We’re not in our 20s anymore so maybe it doesn’t feel as important as it once was, and yet, we all want to feel attractive. We all want to feel wanted and like our spouse still thinks we’re hot.

If you’re struggling to get the spark back, address the stress in your life as much as you can. In the long term, work on getting yourself to a point where you feel acceptance for your amazing “mom-bod” and all of the healthy things it can do. In the short term, spend time with your spouse and go for intimacy in other ways—hold hands, offer him a shoulder rub, hold a kiss a little longer than the usual peck hello and goodbye. You might start to feel a little more in the mood and chances are, he will too!

8. You Have Opposite Schedules

Sometimes we might feel like our marriage can’t be normal because we’re on opposite schedules all the time. This can especially be a challenge if we’re juggling childcare, working different jobs, or just have a lot of commitments.

You might feel like two ships passing in the night. Maybe your sleeping schedules aren’t even the same. He’s a night owl, you’re a morning person—when do you ever get to see each other?

Once again, making time to connect can be so important to keeping your bond strong. You might have to get creative and enjoy brunch or meet up for a lunch date sometimes. If you really are on totally opposite schedules, leave little notes around, pick up a special treat for your spouse, or send him a text message during the day to let him know he’s on your mind. Know that this to shall pass—someday you’ll be on similar schedules and spending more time together.

Marriage is hard, but it’s also great—and there are always things you can do to improve your marriage right now. Every marriage is unique, so it’s hard to say if things are “normal,” but there are definitely some universal challenges we all face and go through.

Keep your marriage strong by focusing on the things you really love and appreciate about your spouse. Tell him the positives and spend time together when you can. Your marriage is just as normal as anyone else’s!

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The Best Gifts for Grads

Ah, graduation season. Such an exciting time of new beginnings!

We’ve all heard the “there’s a graduation for every grade level nowadays” complaint—and I agree. While I don’t think EVERY year needs a HUGE celebration, we certainly value education at our house.

Whether your favorite grad is completing high school or college, it’s all about marking the achievement and celebrating new beginnings as our kids move on to new schools or jobs, say goodbye to friends and teachers, and reach new milestones.

And, of course, all grads love great graduation gifts.

Whether you’re celebrating a major milestone for your own kid or you’re simply looking for a little something to show a niece or nephew you’re proud of them, in most cases, gifts are even better when they’re simple, meaningful, and memorable—and especially if they’re moving out or headed off to college.

High School Graduation Gifts

While yes, some parents choose to give their child a new laptop (and occasionally even a car), many parents might opt for smaller gifts with a lot of sentiment. If you’re an aunt or uncle, grandparent, or a family friend, you may also be looking for the right gift with meaning to commemorate the milestone.

Around graduation season, high school students might also receive a flurry of graduation invitations from friends. Encourage your teens to give from the heart and focus on memories and meaning over more “stuff.”

When kids graduate high school, they’re often headed off to college or moving out on their own. There are a few universal gifts great for every young adult who’s just starting out.

1. Photo Memories

If you have photos and scrapbooks of memories you’ve shared with your high school graduate, it’s a great time to turn them into a gift. Nothing can soothe homesickness quite as much as looking back on some pictures of happy times shared with loved ones.

Put together a photo collage, frame a collection of photos, or even put together a mini-scrapbook of memories that your graduate can take with them as they embark into the great big world.

2. Letters from Loved Ones

Like photos, meaningful letters are just as valuable and sentimental for young graduates. This can be a great time to impart wisdom, share memories of what helped you when you left the nest, or just tell your special kid how much they mean to you.

Focus on qualities you’re proud of, what you’ve noticed about their journey, and what you’re hoping for them in the future. Even if you aren’t traditionally expressive with emotions, a warm and fuzzy letter from the heart can be something more valuable than any gift.

3. Gift Cards (or Dollar Bills)

If you’re invited to a ton of family and friends’ kids’ graduations, you might be faced with a dilemma: You want to give something, but you also don’t want to spend a fortune on graduation gifts.

If you want to go cheap and cute, fold a dollar bill into a graduation hat for a fun and useful gift. You can scale up from dollar bills to $5, $10 or $20 depending on what you can afford (and your relationship with the graduate).

If you want to get craftier, design a cute card with an ice cream cone on the front. Include an ice cream gift certificate and tell them to enjoy a “cold one” on you for their hard work. Include a note about your pride in their accomplishments.

If you want to be practical, gift cards are priceless for new grads. Even a small Target gift card or a gift card to their local grocery store can be huge when they’re running low on cash and they need to stock up on essentials or simply eat a few decent meals at the end of the month.

4. A Special Activity

Giving experiences over gifts can also be a wonderful way to spend some one-on-one time with a younger friend—and it can be so much more meaningful. When teenagers leave home they often experience solitude and distance from friends and relatives, so spending a little time together can really solidify your bond and give you a chance to talk and enjoy each other’s company.

It doesn’t need to be a road trip, a day at Disneyland or a big vacation. Find an activity the two of you have enjoyed together in the past or focus on something that really speaks to your mutual interests—a baseball game, a trip to the art museum and lunch, or even a hike on a local nature preserve can give you a wonderful memory to hold dear.

5. Dorm Kits

When students move in to their dorms or apartments for the first time, they need key items like laundry soap, cleaning spray, toilet paper, and other household items they might not think of. Instant cups of soup and coffee should be on the list too, as many dorms allow for small coffee makers.

Assemble little, practical items together in a cute storage box, and don’t forget some extra pens, highlighters, notepads, and caffeine. If you really want to go all out, be sure your gift is useful, as your grad might be short on space. A comfy bathrobe makes a great gift (especially if they’ll be using communal showers)!

6. Snacks and Food

All college students can use a little help when it comes to embracing their independence. Similar to dorm kits, snacks and food are always appreciated by college-bound kids (or those leaving home for the first time). Your future college student will love a gift basket filled with food and treats. Toss in a gift card for pizza delivery or even a gift card for gas.

College Graduation Gifts

When a graduate has made it all the way through the system and they’re ready to take on their career and launch into adulthood, for many young adults, this might be their first time paying rent, budgeting, and living without a roommate (or in a dorm). Give a gift to help them start their new life out on the right foot.

1. Cookbooks and Recipes

Giving a binder or set of recipe cards with some fast, easy, and basic recipes can help young adults build those cooking life skills and keep them from spending money going out to eat. Many young professionals aren’t super comfortable in the kitchen so having some easy-to-make ideas can be particularly meaningful. It’s also a nice taste of home—grandma’s special cookies or mom’s soup recipe can taste really good when you’ve moved across the country (or just out of your parents’ basement).

2. An All-in-One Life Planner

Most college grads have a lot on their minds as they transition into “real adulthood.” Without the structure of school days and homework assignments, it’s likely they’ll need to establish a new system for effectively setting goals and tracking plans.

Get them started off on the road to success with the Living Well Planner. It’s packed with everything your grad needs to effectively navigate post-college life, including a colorful calendar, monthly budget and goal setting worksheets, and tools to help with meal planning and shopping lists. Plus, there’s space to write “Thoughts and Thanks” and a “Don’t Forget” section, so they’re sure to enter this new phase of life empowered and organized.

3. Décor and Furnishings

If your loved one is just starting out, maybe they’d appreciate some furnishings you might no longer be using. Craigslist furniture can have a questionable past, and a familiar couch, chair, or table (even with a little wear and tear) can really make a new place feel like home. Bonus: it’s a chance to clean out some of the stuff you might no longer be using.

4. Meaningful Gifts

A college graduation is a great time to give family heirlooms, letters, and other meaningful items.  When a student leaves high school, they often aren’t ready to store and care for things, but as they embark into “real adulthood,” they’ll value grandma’s necklace, grandpa’s watch, or a photo album from home.

5. Family Time

Once your child starts their career, they’re officially out of the nest, so planning family activities can become more and more challenging. This is especially true as boyfriend and girlfriends become spouses and children are added to the mix.

Spend a last hurrah with your adult kids by going on a family trip or doing something fun together. Go to Disneyland, go to a music festival together, or get tickets to the sporting event you’ve always talked about.

6. Resume Help

Lend your years of expertise and experience helping your college graduate craft an excellent resume and even brush up on interview skills and networking. Offering to edit or spend an afternoon talking job prospects and ideas can be just the thing to help a young adult who’s entering the workforce.

If you want to give a gift, professional clothing such as a suit or work-appropriate accessories like a computer bag can be great options for a young professional. No matter the career field, starting out can be a challenge. Help them put their best food forward!

Graduation gifts don’t have to be lavish or expensive to be meaningful or make a real impact. The small, heartfelt gifts are often the ones we cherish the most. We’ve even created this super cute printable that you can print out on card stock and frame to give along side your gift. No matter what age your graduate, aim to give from the heart—find items that say something about your relationship or help create even more memories for the two of you to share.

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Simple Shrimp & Broccoli Bake

 

If you read this blog regularly, you already know that I am a little obsessed with “cheater” freezer cooking. Not only are these simple meals quick & easy to throw together, they save us a ton of money on groceries (and especially on eating out.)  Better yet, they make our sometimes hectic weekdays SO much simpler!

Even so, every now and then it’s fun to throw in something a little new and different into the mix.  Thus, so while this yummy–and super simple–Shrimp and Broccoli bake is not a TRUE freezer recipe, it does call for frozen shrimp, which is usually more economical than fresh.   The rest of this recipe comes together so quickly and with just a few ingredients.

Here is what you need:

1 bag frozen peeled and divined medium shrimp, defrosted
2 12.6 oz. bags frozen broccoli
2 -3 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 cup fresh parsley, chopped
salt & pepper to taste
1/2 cup butter
1 cup seasoned  panko
1 lemon

Step 1: Preheat oven to 350 degrees; chop garlic and parsley and set aside.

Step 2: Zest lemon then juice and set aside.

Step 3: Melt 1/4 cup butter, then add garlic, parsley, salt and pepper and lemon zest and juice and saute for about 3 minutes.

Step 4: Par-cook broccoli in microwave and set aside.

Step 5: Melt rest of butter then add panko and mix well and lightly toast for a few minutes.

Step 6: Then place shrimp in 9 x 13 glass pan, add melted butter & garlic mixture. Mix well to coat all shrimp. Then place broccoli florets over shrimp. Add lightly panko over top, cover with foil and bake for 15 minutes. Then take cover off and bake for 5-7 more minutes until panko is golden brown.

Step 7: Spoon onto plate and serve with a side of rice.

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Recipe: Simple Shrimp and Broccoli Bake

Summary: This shrimp dinner comes together in one pan for an amazing restaurant quality meal.

Ingredients

1 bag frozen peeled and divined medium shrimp, defrosted
1  large bag frozen broccoli
2 -3 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 cup fresh parsley, chopped
red pepper flakes
salt & pepper to taste
1/2 cup butter
1/2 cup panko
1 lemon



Instructions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees;Chop garlic and parsley and set aside.
Zest lemon then juice and set aside.
Melt 1/4 cup butter, then add garlic, parsley, salt and pepper and lemon zest and juice and saute for about 3 minutes.
Par-cook broccoli in microwave and set aside.
Melt rest of butter then add panko and mix well and lightly toast for a few minutes.
Then place shrimp in 9 x 13 glass pan, add melted butter & garlic mixture. Mix well to coat all shrimp. Then place broccoli florets over shrimp. Add lightly panko over top, cover with foil and bake for 15 minutes. Then take cover off and bake for 5-7 more minutes until panko is golden brown.
Spoon onto plate and serve with a side of rice.

Preparation time: 5-7 minutes

Cooking time: 20-25 minute(s)

Number of servings (yield): 4-6

 

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How to Create a Financial Plan for the Year- May

May is such a great month, isn’t it? Mother’s Day, sunshine, longer days, flowers, and summer is just on the horizon!

We might even find a burst of motivation and a renewed sense of commitment to tackling our goals. While we might be anticipating extra summer spending (maybe vacations and activities when the kids are out of school), it’s also a great time for inexpensive fun and earning extra money.

This post is part of our Financial Plan for the Year Series! I’ve broken each month down into three simple action items (yes, just 3!) to ensure you stay on track financially throughout the year. This plan is flexible, so jump in this month or skip back to our January post to tackle the full series.

Feeling time-crunched and overwhelmed? This plan will still work great for you! To start small and simple, just pick one item to tackle at first. Then you can add to your financial goals as you go, all at your own pace. You can do it!

May: Spring Cleaning and Summer Saving

May is a great time to tackle the garage and hold a yard sale. After spring cleaning, you’ll probably end up with a few items you could sell for extra money. (Speaking of spring cleaning, the Living Well Spending Less Spring Cleaning Planner is available for FREE for a limited time!)

May is also great for getting a head start on your summer of savings! Can you pick up a summer job? Are there activities you can scale back on this year? Maybe a staycation…or planning a few no-spend family activities? Plus, it’s much easier to find activities that don’t cost a dime when the weather’s so nice!

Action Items for May:

Clean Out the Garage
Plan a Yard Sale
Plan a Summer of Savings

Before You Start: Check Your Progress

At the beginning of each month, it helps to check your progress and revisit your budget to see how your spending has changed. For example, can you get by with less gas in the summer months by running errands on foot or by bike? Can you cut back on cable television or opt for a fan instead of an air conditioner for most of the summer? Can you cancel your gym membership and work outside in the cooler spring mornings?

Check where you are with your savings goals and where you could use a little boost. A yard sale might be a great opportunity to add to your emergency fund!

1. Clean Out Your Garage

May is a great time to clean out the garage and sell items you’re no longer using. You’re probably ready to pull out the lawn furniture, dust off the toys and sports equipment, and even detail your car.

As you’re going through all your outdoor items, it’s time to ruthlessly purge anything cluttering up your space. Deep clean and organize as you go and you’ll be less likely to hold on to stuff you’re saving for a rainy (or sunny) day. (Think toys your kids might have grown out of, sports gear, and household items you’re storing in the garage.)

Ready to do a full-on garage clean out? Read this post detailing How To Deep Clean Your Garage.

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Between cleaning out the garage and spring cleaning (and as you get your house and even your wardrobe ready for summer), watch for items you can add to your garage sale.

2. Hold a Yard Sale

Once you’re ready to hold your yard sale, target a weekend that fits the pace of your neighborhood. If you live in a town where people often vacation or visit during holidays, you may want to schedule it over Memorial Day weekend. If, on the other hand, you live in a holiday-weekend ghost town, save the sale for a busier time.

Coordinate with your neighbors to see if they have items to sell or if they’d like to join you. Combining forces to tackle pricing, tagging, and manning the register on sale day ensures an easier event for everyone. Aim low when it comes to prices. You can still make a profit even if you price your items on special. When shoppers are visiting a rummage/garage sale, they’re often looking for great deals and bargains. Give them what they want and price your items to move.

Advertise your sale with flyers, on your neighborhood message boards, on Craigslist, and anywhere else you know people in your town frequent. It often helps to list a few of the most popular items to really entice your customers and draw them in. You can even offer a discount if they mention the flyer.

On the day of your garage sale, start early! Lay out and price your items to sell. Have lots of bags on hand as well as other helpful items for your shoppers (like rope, twine and boxes) so they can cash and carry.

Make it your goal to get rid of as much as possible. So by 10am, it might be time to offer a 50% off discount or another incentive to move items out the door. Whatever is left over after your sale is finished, pack it up and take it to your nearest Goodwill or thrift store. Try not to bring anything back in the house! (And remember, this is as much about cleaning out as it is about making some extra cash for your emergency fund!)

3. Plan a Summer of Savings

As your thoughts turn to vacations and activities over the summer, think smart and savings-focused. We all want to pack as many memories and activities into our summer days—but if you’re trying to get back on financial track and make headway with your debt and savings goals, summer is a great time to spend less (rather than more)!

Look at what your town has to offer and check out staycation ideas. Are there festivals in your city? Outdoor music opportunities? Fairs and carnivals? Check your local listings to discover what’s happening and make the most of your local attractions this year (rather than planning a deluxe and expensive vacation).

If you’re hoping to make even more headway on your financial goals, summer is a great time to pick up extra jobs. The weather is nice and kids are at home, so consider opportunities teaching classes or preschool from your home, teaching kids a skill (sewing, painting, music, cooking), or even offering playtime for fellow parents.

Spring is also a great time to look into temporary summer jobs. Consider local jobs like dog walking, yardwork, or odd jobs the kids could help out with. Get creative and discover opportunities right in your neighborhood. You just might find you can earn quite a bit in the summer, and with the longer days, you might have more energy to keep up (and still enjoy time with the kids).

Bonus: Best Purchases in May

There are lots of delicious fruits and veggies coming into season in spring. Snap up beans, peas, carrots, radishes, celery, and herbs, as well as strawberries. Plants often start clearing out after Mother’s Day, so by the end of the month you can save on seedlings.

Beyond the farmers market, May is a great time to buy summer clothing, as most of it has already been reduced to clear out, believe it or not. You can often find good deals on swimsuits and summer shoes.

Watch for deals on mattresses in the month of May. Office furniture also starts to clear out right after tax time in April, so May is a great time to accessorize your office. Refrigerators also go on sale in May.

Vacation deals crop up in May as well and resorts are often running bargains. Watch Groupon and other discount sites for sales on activities and places to check out.

Whatever you do in May, it’s a great month to really get excited about summer and start thinking of ways you can get outside and enjoy yourself!

The post How to Create a Financial Plan for the Year- May appeared first on Living Well Spending Less®.