Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 198
July 27, 2015
Day 2- Book Tour Updates
Sometimes it seems
We'll touch that dream
But things come slow or not at all
And the ones on top, won't make it stop
So convinced that they might fall
Let's love ourselves then we can't fail
To make a better situation
Tomorrow, our seeds will grow
All we need is dedication - Lauren Hill (Everything is Everything)
Central Park for a water fight (yes water fight I said, people had water guns that looked like it came off a star wars movie) and a run (6 kilometers), Barnes and Nobles to sit, smell and read books while drinking coffee.
Meeting with Phoebe, owner of Sugar Cane Restaurant and hostess of the Sangria and Statements Garden Reading on Sunday 2nd 2015- absolutely fun time I had with her, she's such a darling- and can make boiled water taste good, the woman can cook!!! We sat and chatted and laughed and the meeting was like a big lime (Trini slang for chilling out)
On a plane again this morning though, the event at the Trinidad and Tobago Consul High Commission of Trinidad and Tobago in New York City was super duper fabulous, every single book was sold and the highlight was having my mum here sitting up in the front with her sister,my aunt (my mighty crew!!)
Here I go again..... see you on the other side!Peace!!
We'll touch that dream
But things come slow or not at all
And the ones on top, won't make it stop
So convinced that they might fall
Let's love ourselves then we can't fail
To make a better situation
Tomorrow, our seeds will grow
All we need is dedication - Lauren Hill (Everything is Everything)
Central Park for a water fight (yes water fight I said, people had water guns that looked like it came off a star wars movie) and a run (6 kilometers), Barnes and Nobles to sit, smell and read books while drinking coffee.
Meeting with Phoebe, owner of Sugar Cane Restaurant and hostess of the Sangria and Statements Garden Reading on Sunday 2nd 2015- absolutely fun time I had with her, she's such a darling- and can make boiled water taste good, the woman can cook!!! We sat and chatted and laughed and the meeting was like a big lime (Trini slang for chilling out)
On a plane again this morning though, the event at the Trinidad and Tobago Consul High Commission of Trinidad and Tobago in New York City was super duper fabulous, every single book was sold and the highlight was having my mum here sitting up in the front with her sister,my aunt (my mighty crew!!)
Here I go again..... see you on the other side!Peace!!
July 25, 2015
Day 1 - Book Tour Updates
All the self-deception in the world can only hide the truth, not change it - ACIMI love to fly, I love the entire concept of sitting down for a few hours and boom I am in a totally new place, delays and all! I love the unpredictability of the experience, I delight in the unexpected because life is delighted to deliver it, I play along. First leg of the tour is NYC- Sunday evening I am a part of the High Commission of Trinidad and Tobago in New York City's Emancipation Day Celebrations. They have a lovely celebration put together and I am very humbled to be asked to share my book. Before this though, on Friday evening I meet with the organizers of the following weekend's event tonight at 8pm for a dinner meeting, absolutely lovely lady, I am very excited to meet up with her again!
So, as I was waiting on the delayed flight , my mind racing about why or what was I doing, thinking, and feeling to have changed a friendship I thought I had. It got me feeling like a two cent(we used that slang on the street I grew up to mean feeling low, don't ask me how we came up with it but it was most popular) so there I was feeling like a two cent because I did not accept the truth that things have changed and our communication is now at best random two line sentences, regardless of why, that is the reality of it.
Acceptance is a tough one isn't it? But absolutely essential in moving forward because as Iyanla says "you have to call a thing a thing" and then when you do you can take the appropriate action.
Acceptance doesn't mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there's got to be a way through it.
After acceptance the work can begin.
So what is acceptance?
Acceptance is what We are. No judgment, no control, no manipulation, simply being love.
Do not judge anything. When you see the bigger picture one day, you will understand that everything is perfect. Everyone, everything, every moment is in perfect balance of where you are now.
Peace
So, as I was waiting on the delayed flight , my mind racing about why or what was I doing, thinking, and feeling to have changed a friendship I thought I had. It got me feeling like a two cent(we used that slang on the street I grew up to mean feeling low, don't ask me how we came up with it but it was most popular) so there I was feeling like a two cent because I did not accept the truth that things have changed and our communication is now at best random two line sentences, regardless of why, that is the reality of it.
Acceptance is a tough one isn't it? But absolutely essential in moving forward because as Iyanla says "you have to call a thing a thing" and then when you do you can take the appropriate action.
Acceptance doesn't mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there's got to be a way through it.
After acceptance the work can begin.
So what is acceptance?
Acceptance is what We are. No judgment, no control, no manipulation, simply being love.
Do not judge anything. When you see the bigger picture one day, you will understand that everything is perfect. Everyone, everything, every moment is in perfect balance of where you are now.
Peace
July 23, 2015
Everything I do is by choice
Everything I do is by choice
Remove the expression “have to” from your vocabulary and your thinking, because it is going to release a lot of self-imposed pressure on you. You can create tremendous pressure by saying “I have to get up,” “I have to do this,” “I have to, I have to.” Instead, begin by saying “I choose to…” It puts a whole different perspective on your life. Everything you do is by choice. It may not seem so, but it is. Louise Hay (the queen of affirmations)
I have no choice. What does that statement mean to you?
I have no choice. Do you say it to mean that you are trapped, stuck, without any option?
I have no choice. Do you say it defeated and feel defeated as it leaves your mouth?
I have no choice. Do you say it empowered and feel empowered as you say it?
I have no choice. Do you say it to convince yourself that you are making the best decision?
I have no choice. Do you say it to justify the action that you have taken?
I have no choice. Do you say it to justify the means to the end?
When you say " I have no choice" what exactly do you mean? How exactly do you feel in that moment?
I have eliminated saying "I have no choice" from my vocabulary, for me, everything I do I believe that I do have a choice, to not make a choice is a choice, to not decide is also a choice or a decision.
I have learnt that in every moment that I have a choice and I can always always choose again.
I have learnt that choosing reignites my power because sometimes I may fall into the false belief that I am powerless and cannot do anything, I have learnt that choosing gives me wings and that living by default is giving away my power. By not making a choice is giving away my power.
I always have a choice, this I have learnt and I choose to remember that every single day!
So what are you waiting on? You have a choice to make
Peace!!
I am travelling today, off to Toronto and NYC for a book tour, check out the events on my website
http://www.akosuadardaineedwards.com/...
Remove the expression “have to” from your vocabulary and your thinking, because it is going to release a lot of self-imposed pressure on you. You can create tremendous pressure by saying “I have to get up,” “I have to do this,” “I have to, I have to.” Instead, begin by saying “I choose to…” It puts a whole different perspective on your life. Everything you do is by choice. It may not seem so, but it is. Louise Hay (the queen of affirmations)
I have no choice. What does that statement mean to you?
I have no choice. Do you say it to mean that you are trapped, stuck, without any option?
I have no choice. Do you say it defeated and feel defeated as it leaves your mouth?
I have no choice. Do you say it empowered and feel empowered as you say it?
I have no choice. Do you say it to convince yourself that you are making the best decision?
I have no choice. Do you say it to justify the action that you have taken?
I have no choice. Do you say it to justify the means to the end?
When you say " I have no choice" what exactly do you mean? How exactly do you feel in that moment?
I have eliminated saying "I have no choice" from my vocabulary, for me, everything I do I believe that I do have a choice, to not make a choice is a choice, to not decide is also a choice or a decision.
I have learnt that in every moment that I have a choice and I can always always choose again.
I have learnt that choosing reignites my power because sometimes I may fall into the false belief that I am powerless and cannot do anything, I have learnt that choosing gives me wings and that living by default is giving away my power. By not making a choice is giving away my power.
I always have a choice, this I have learnt and I choose to remember that every single day!
So what are you waiting on? You have a choice to make
Peace!!
I am travelling today, off to Toronto and NYC for a book tour, check out the events on my website
http://www.akosuadardaineedwards.com/...
July 22, 2015
There is value in deciding in advance
The value of deciding in advance what you want to happen is simply that you will perceive the situation as a means to make it happen. You will therefore make every effort to overlook what interferes with the accomplishment of your objective, and concentrate on everything that helps you meet it.
ACIM
Yesterday I called my grand mum, standard weekly call. She asked me how I was doing, in my usual response " Sheils I am good"I call her Sheils. When I was growing up I would hear her friends calling her Sheils and I would come after they had left the house and say Sheils how are you?
Her name is Sheila.
She would immediately stop me and say when you become a big woman over 25 you can call my name until then it's mummy, grandma or Miss Sandy ok? So the day I turned 25 I called her from London and said "Sheils I am 25!" She laughed and said I guess I did make a promise so from since then I call her on the phone and say Sheils how are you? Anyways I digress..
We were chatting about an opportunity that I missed out on that really had me questioning myself and feeling so disappointed, without even thinking I said "maybe God is punishing me Sheils"She said "Wait, hold up for a moment, which God are you referring to? You know better. You know that God, the God you serve, is not one that punishes anyone, you know this, you know that we speak about God being a loving God who gave all of us free will, the ability to choose and whatever choice you make has consequences, so please, please don't tell me any nonsense about you being punished, you made certain choices and now you are seeing what the consequence of the choices are or you have sent out some mixed signals without believing"The moment she said it I knew she was making sense!
I started her off, now it was a challenge to stop her"We keep praying to the same God for what we already have and then wonder if God is listening rather than if we are paying attention, stop blaming God for your problems, okay madam?" Focus on the choices you make and take responsibility and ownership for the consequences, blaming anyone including God is a cop out!Ok then Sheils! Lesson learnt
Peace!!
Yesterday I called my grand mum, standard weekly call. She asked me how I was doing, in my usual response " Sheils I am good"I call her Sheils. When I was growing up I would hear her friends calling her Sheils and I would come after they had left the house and say Sheils how are you?
Her name is Sheila.
She would immediately stop me and say when you become a big woman over 25 you can call my name until then it's mummy, grandma or Miss Sandy ok? So the day I turned 25 I called her from London and said "Sheils I am 25!" She laughed and said I guess I did make a promise so from since then I call her on the phone and say Sheils how are you? Anyways I digress..
We were chatting about an opportunity that I missed out on that really had me questioning myself and feeling so disappointed, without even thinking I said "maybe God is punishing me Sheils"She said "Wait, hold up for a moment, which God are you referring to? You know better. You know that God, the God you serve, is not one that punishes anyone, you know this, you know that we speak about God being a loving God who gave all of us free will, the ability to choose and whatever choice you make has consequences, so please, please don't tell me any nonsense about you being punished, you made certain choices and now you are seeing what the consequence of the choices are or you have sent out some mixed signals without believing"The moment she said it I knew she was making sense!
I started her off, now it was a challenge to stop her"We keep praying to the same God for what we already have and then wonder if God is listening rather than if we are paying attention, stop blaming God for your problems, okay madam?" Focus on the choices you make and take responsibility and ownership for the consequences, blaming anyone including God is a cop out!Ok then Sheils! Lesson learnt
Peace!!
July 21, 2015
Take care of your mind Dumplin.
“Our mind is a womb. It brings life.”
As a woman you cannot be careless with your thoughts, your speech, your intentions, your time, or your life. It all has powers and will create things, whether we intend them to or not. Get careless or thoughtless and your mind will create careless and thoughtless circumstances. Who wants that? I don’t. Take care of your mind Dumplin. Monitor your thoughts. Be intentional in the books you read. Be intentional in the television you watch. It all matters.
Iyanla Vanzant
One of my favorite prayers is "Lord, today let me not be careless with the working and use of my mind" I say it often because I know the power my mind has. I am a co creator of my life and it starts with my mind, conscious or unconsciously we create, the thoughts we think, the words we speak. They start showing up in reality, in our lives.
The moment I learnt to "stand guard at the door of my mind" from a group of women in Uganda my whole world started to change, simple, just like that! I fall back into the trap ever so often of being mindless but how wonderful is life to show me through what is going on around me what I am thinking. Things start showing up in my world and I'm like oh oh stinking thinking, get back on track!!!
I practice daily, I ask myself " Hey awesome, what are you thinking?" Sometimes I say "Oh snap, snap that sista, do not let your mind dignify any nonsense"
Careful now, this may mean spending less time with some people, or doing things you did before, you recognize right away when people are not paying attention to their thoughts and words. It is a journey, that means, changing your programmed thinking will not happen overnight, rest assured that awareness is the first step.
The mind is really a terrible thing to waste!
So awesome people, what are you thinking?
Peace!
One of my favorite prayers is "Lord, today let me not be careless with the working and use of my mind" I say it often because I know the power my mind has. I am a co creator of my life and it starts with my mind, conscious or unconsciously we create, the thoughts we think, the words we speak. They start showing up in reality, in our lives.
The moment I learnt to "stand guard at the door of my mind" from a group of women in Uganda my whole world started to change, simple, just like that! I fall back into the trap ever so often of being mindless but how wonderful is life to show me through what is going on around me what I am thinking. Things start showing up in my world and I'm like oh oh stinking thinking, get back on track!!!
I practice daily, I ask myself " Hey awesome, what are you thinking?" Sometimes I say "Oh snap, snap that sista, do not let your mind dignify any nonsense"
Careful now, this may mean spending less time with some people, or doing things you did before, you recognize right away when people are not paying attention to their thoughts and words. It is a journey, that means, changing your programmed thinking will not happen overnight, rest assured that awareness is the first step.
The mind is really a terrible thing to waste!
So awesome people, what are you thinking?
Peace!
July 20, 2015
You have to learn to trust
To be detached from the outcome of a result means that you have learnt to trust.
When you know that Spirit will give you what you need – not necessarily what you want (that’s Ego’s job) – then you will learn to do the work that is required to be done and move on. The results will take care of themselves. Whatever the outcome of the results that will be dealt with at the appropriate time. If you stand in the way of the energy creating the outcome, or result, through your lack of trust, insecurity and fearfulness, you put a barrier in the way of blocking the efficiency of that flow of energy. By learning to trust, you live in the wisdom of insecurity and uncertainty where there are unlimited opportunities being created in the present moment of now. The Law of Detachment
The word detachment kept popping up in my head all weekend, it was flashing like a neon sign! I did not get it! While running yesterday morning it became even louder, almost like a song in my head.
Why are you trying to control the outcome of certain events? Take that time and energy to create, put the work in and trust. Show up, shine and let it go.
You either trust or you don't, there is absolutely no grey area or in between where this is concerned. They cannot co-exist, you either trust or you don't!
So, my process this week, put in the work, trust and let it go!
What have you been trying to control?
Peace!
July 18, 2015
Are you controlled by a memory?
You will know you are being controlled by a memory if you insist on doing a certain thing in a certain way, because you are convinced your reason for doing it is right.
You can be pretty sure you are being controlled by a memory when you interpret the things you see or hear in whats that cause you anger, fear and resentment.
When a memory of something you have forgotten is controlling your life, you will say things that are not true, you will do things that are not productive, you will hear things that are not said, you will see things that are not there.
You will respond in ways that are inappropriate and out of character
In these cases, your soul is calling out for healing. (Until Today)
What are your triggers? Do you know?
Things that tick and piss you off so easily and most times have nothing to the other person? You trip! You cuss them out believing that they deserve it because that is "just how you are"
Or maybe you withdraw, disappear, cut them off, because "that is just who you are"
Perhaps you may need to look at them for a hot minute? I'm just saying.....
Peace!
You can be pretty sure you are being controlled by a memory when you interpret the things you see or hear in whats that cause you anger, fear and resentment.
When a memory of something you have forgotten is controlling your life, you will say things that are not true, you will do things that are not productive, you will hear things that are not said, you will see things that are not there.
You will respond in ways that are inappropriate and out of character
In these cases, your soul is calling out for healing. (Until Today)
What are your triggers? Do you know?
Things that tick and piss you off so easily and most times have nothing to the other person? You trip! You cuss them out believing that they deserve it because that is "just how you are"
Or maybe you withdraw, disappear, cut them off, because "that is just who you are"
Perhaps you may need to look at them for a hot minute? I'm just saying.....
Peace!
July 17, 2015
Invincible.....................
“it is being honest
about
my pain
that
makes me invincible.”
― Nayyirah Waheed
I once thought that I had to do everything right, I had to solve all my so called problems, I had to be independent and do all the "proper" things, I had to be quiet and polite and nice! Where did I get those ideas from? who the hell knows! But I can tell you something it is bloody tiring to be playing miss perfect! This thing we called life, perfection is not a requirement to live it, it really isn't! Then I was introduced to life, it's challenges and pain and all the other good stuff. There was me still on this so called "having it all together, perfection road" well at least in my own mind I thought I was
Denial is really lying to yourself! Thank you Universe for showing me a different path.
No one is exempt from this process of life and it's ups and downs. Share your stories and do it in an empowering way which serve you first and then others! Stop being fake and pretending that its all honky dory! There are others out there going through the shit storm as well! Awareness and acknowledgement initiates healing and growth.
Let go
Forgive
Live a full authentic life
Admit when you don't know
You don't have to be perfect
and know that it is really all lessons
feel the feelings, all of it, feel all of it
Those who judge you well stop, get them off the bus, bless them and keep moving!
The ones who live a full life are the ones who got back on the bus and kept moving rather than parked up and stayed in one spot!
In my first book, I poured it all out, it saved my life, it really did!
I feel now that I can do anything! And I'm doing it!
You may not want to go down the road of writing a book, you may have another way of letting it all out, do it!
Come join me, it really is a lot of fun!
Peace!
about
my pain
that
makes me invincible.”
― Nayyirah Waheed
I once thought that I had to do everything right, I had to solve all my so called problems, I had to be independent and do all the "proper" things, I had to be quiet and polite and nice! Where did I get those ideas from? who the hell knows! But I can tell you something it is bloody tiring to be playing miss perfect! This thing we called life, perfection is not a requirement to live it, it really isn't! Then I was introduced to life, it's challenges and pain and all the other good stuff. There was me still on this so called "having it all together, perfection road" well at least in my own mind I thought I was
Denial is really lying to yourself! Thank you Universe for showing me a different path.
No one is exempt from this process of life and it's ups and downs. Share your stories and do it in an empowering way which serve you first and then others! Stop being fake and pretending that its all honky dory! There are others out there going through the shit storm as well! Awareness and acknowledgement initiates healing and growth.
Let go
Forgive
Live a full authentic life
Admit when you don't know
You don't have to be perfect
and know that it is really all lessons
feel the feelings, all of it, feel all of it
Those who judge you well stop, get them off the bus, bless them and keep moving!
The ones who live a full life are the ones who got back on the bus and kept moving rather than parked up and stayed in one spot!
In my first book, I poured it all out, it saved my life, it really did!
I feel now that I can do anything! And I'm doing it!
You may not want to go down the road of writing a book, you may have another way of letting it all out, do it!
Come join me, it really is a lot of fun!
Peace!
July 16, 2015
To not decide is to decide
Live a whole life .Work can be an important part of our lives, but we should never let it be how we define ourselves. Putting all your energy and resources into your work may feed your ego, but if you’re relationships are falling apart, your health neglected and your spiritual life ignored, you could end up sitting alone in your castle of glory.
I walked in the boxing gym, the coach gave me the "you are late stare" I walked over to him he handed me the skipping rope and said " you are weighing in today, the fight is on August 1st in Arima" The grin on my face grew into one of those that said " if I don't laugh tears will flow""Coach, I am out of the country on the 1st""Listen, this is enough, you came here to fight not to run, when will you be ready to fight? It's been too long, time to face the battle on the ropes"I swear he thought I must have been Rocky Balboa or something and preparing me to fight!"Coach for real, I am out of the country on the first"I got the dirtiest look, he said "no wraps on your hand, gloves only, let's go"After three rounds of sparring, my hand was burning, I wanted to cry, he said "you keep running, just keep it up, one day you will get tired and it will catch up with you, we're done for tonight"
I walked out of the gym and thought about what he said, keep running and you will get tired. Why not decide? Why do I wait until it's critical to decide and to not decide is to decide, you end up living by default, shit hits fan a whole lot in that mode!Decide! And to make another choice is to decide!And just for the record, no I will not be fighting on 1st August in Arima I will be in Toronto sharing lessons on the journey but by then a decision will be made on my fight!Peace!
I walked in the boxing gym, the coach gave me the "you are late stare" I walked over to him he handed me the skipping rope and said " you are weighing in today, the fight is on August 1st in Arima" The grin on my face grew into one of those that said " if I don't laugh tears will flow""Coach, I am out of the country on the 1st""Listen, this is enough, you came here to fight not to run, when will you be ready to fight? It's been too long, time to face the battle on the ropes"I swear he thought I must have been Rocky Balboa or something and preparing me to fight!"Coach for real, I am out of the country on the first"I got the dirtiest look, he said "no wraps on your hand, gloves only, let's go"After three rounds of sparring, my hand was burning, I wanted to cry, he said "you keep running, just keep it up, one day you will get tired and it will catch up with you, we're done for tonight"
I walked out of the gym and thought about what he said, keep running and you will get tired. Why not decide? Why do I wait until it's critical to decide and to not decide is to decide, you end up living by default, shit hits fan a whole lot in that mode!Decide! And to make another choice is to decide!And just for the record, no I will not be fighting on 1st August in Arima I will be in Toronto sharing lessons on the journey but by then a decision will be made on my fight!Peace!
July 15, 2015
Our only problem is thinking we have a problem.
Our only problem is thinking we have a problem. The thought that "I don't have it yet" is the problem. We need to be enlightened from thinking we need to be enlightened. All that has to change is that thought, and the thought changes nothing, does nothing, because we are always already enlightened, always already happy, always already perfect. God created us that way and we can't change it; all we can do is forget it and pretend we are something else.
ACIM
One of my many teachers said to me in response to a situation that I was going through that was kicking my butt "This is happening for you, not to you" and I remember this always mainly because on the other side of it all I learn, I become, I grow and that is a beautiful thing!
Are you always looking at what you don't have, what you think you need, what is missing, and not "here" yet? Isn't that exhausting? Why not try this start with what you have, set some goals, objectives and high standards and move towards them with the belief that it is coming or something even better will? It may not look the way you want it to look that doesn't mean that it isn't working or that you have to continue focusing on "it" not coming or "it" being a problem.
The thoughts based on lack and limitation only create more of the same, I'm just saying......
Change those thoughts and see what happens, believe that!Peace!
One of my many teachers said to me in response to a situation that I was going through that was kicking my butt "This is happening for you, not to you" and I remember this always mainly because on the other side of it all I learn, I become, I grow and that is a beautiful thing!
Are you always looking at what you don't have, what you think you need, what is missing, and not "here" yet? Isn't that exhausting? Why not try this start with what you have, set some goals, objectives and high standards and move towards them with the belief that it is coming or something even better will? It may not look the way you want it to look that doesn't mean that it isn't working or that you have to continue focusing on "it" not coming or "it" being a problem.
The thoughts based on lack and limitation only create more of the same, I'm just saying......
Change those thoughts and see what happens, believe that!Peace!
