Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 186
December 21, 2015
You end up with a little more courage
The average human being will go to any lengths to avoid the experience of being hurt, being abandoned, or being rejected.
Hurt takes on a totally different perspective when you are afraid of it.
In order to protect themselves there are people who will not indulge in any personal contact or closeness.
Some of them will go so far as to strike first, hurting others before they get hurt.
When you are afraid to be hurt, you can spend a better part of your lifetime on the location for hurt, expecting to be hurt.
There is something you must remember
What you Expect you usually get.
Iyanla Vanzant
So I was doing my daily morning reading and I came across the quote above from Iyanla and I had a "penny dropping moment" or some would say an A-HA moment.
You get what you expect - that's big! and even bigger living life to avoid hurt, or rejection, or in fact, how and what we believe are hurt and rejection, really limits and puts a different spin on situations.
The discomfort, the stories we make up to avoid the uncomfortable situations at times puts limits on what we can and will do, or may go. So the choice is courage over discomfort. Many times, and part of that choice of courage, is taking risks of doing the thing, meeting the person, opening up your heart, flying across the world to take a job, going to an interview, asking someone for something and so on and so on. And just to avoid being hurt, rejected or abandoned we chose the safe route, one of what we know and at the same time wondering what might have been, we eventually bury the feelings but feelings buried alive don't die, they fester and layers and layers of them added on start causing illness, resentment and other types of build up
So, do the thing, meet the person, fly where you want to fly, tell that guy that he's scorching hot, make the call. What's the worst that can happen? You end up where you started, with a little more courage
And, know this, all things are lessons that God would have us learn
Peace
Hurt takes on a totally different perspective when you are afraid of it.
In order to protect themselves there are people who will not indulge in any personal contact or closeness.
Some of them will go so far as to strike first, hurting others before they get hurt.
When you are afraid to be hurt, you can spend a better part of your lifetime on the location for hurt, expecting to be hurt.
There is something you must remember
What you Expect you usually get.
Iyanla Vanzant
So I was doing my daily morning reading and I came across the quote above from Iyanla and I had a "penny dropping moment" or some would say an A-HA moment.
You get what you expect - that's big! and even bigger living life to avoid hurt, or rejection, or in fact, how and what we believe are hurt and rejection, really limits and puts a different spin on situations.
The discomfort, the stories we make up to avoid the uncomfortable situations at times puts limits on what we can and will do, or may go. So the choice is courage over discomfort. Many times, and part of that choice of courage, is taking risks of doing the thing, meeting the person, opening up your heart, flying across the world to take a job, going to an interview, asking someone for something and so on and so on. And just to avoid being hurt, rejected or abandoned we chose the safe route, one of what we know and at the same time wondering what might have been, we eventually bury the feelings but feelings buried alive don't die, they fester and layers and layers of them added on start causing illness, resentment and other types of build up
So, do the thing, meet the person, fly where you want to fly, tell that guy that he's scorching hot, make the call. What's the worst that can happen? You end up where you started, with a little more courage
And, know this, all things are lessons that God would have us learn
Peace
December 19, 2015
Knowing the truth
"Determination" or "stick-to-it-iveness" Or "standing by our convictions" or "exhibiting perseverance". Metaphysically, it is called "knowing the truth"
Neale Donald Walsh
Human beings want evidence that what they are doing is worthwhile, that it is making a difference, that it will pay off in the end or in the long run, when that evidence is not forth coming in the time and way that we know, anxiety steps in, panic sometimes, indifference perhaps or just plain ole desperation.
Human beings want what they want and they want it now, in their own way
This is where "knowing the truth" and having faith comes in, patience also plays a big part in the equation
Newsflash, we, humans, don't know everything and what we know is based upon past experiences and seeing, hearing and being around other experiences, but there is so much more, so much more to learn and experience.
Know the truth, know that there is a process- for everything
Know that when you are not seeing the physical evidence you can lean on the faith and determination to pull you through
Know that doubt and anxiety is a type of fear
Know that you are not limited, your mind is
Know that self-belief trumps it all
then act like you know
Peace
Human beings want evidence that what they are doing is worthwhile, that it is making a difference, that it will pay off in the end or in the long run, when that evidence is not forth coming in the time and way that we know, anxiety steps in, panic sometimes, indifference perhaps or just plain ole desperation.
Human beings want what they want and they want it now, in their own way
This is where "knowing the truth" and having faith comes in, patience also plays a big part in the equation
Newsflash, we, humans, don't know everything and what we know is based upon past experiences and seeing, hearing and being around other experiences, but there is so much more, so much more to learn and experience.
Know the truth, know that there is a process- for everything
Know that when you are not seeing the physical evidence you can lean on the faith and determination to pull you through
Know that doubt and anxiety is a type of fear
Know that you are not limited, your mind is
Know that self-belief trumps it all
then act like you know
Peace
December 18, 2015
From me to you....
From me to you...I got this Oath last year while I was doing my annual ritual of "Pumping up the Power of My Life", I want to share it with you today from my heart to yoursI pray that it is as useful to you as it is to me...Peace
The Oath of ManifestationI accept and receive unexpected good, unexpected money, unexpected love, unexpected generosity, unexpected offers, unexpected prosperity coming in unexpected ways from unexpected places in my life and the life of others. I am constantly guided, and boldly empowered, to receive the lavish abundance of the Universe! I accept the Principles that abundance and prosperity have already been given to me. My acceptance makes it real and opens the space for manifestation to rush in! I open wide the doors of my consciousness to receive and to give! It IS done now! Through this Oath of Manifestation ALL things are possible! I declare, absolutely that I live in a friendly Universe that is always providing for me. I feel it powerful happening now! I open to receive more abundance, and to give more abundance, than I have ever experienced before! I can afford anything I desire! In fact, I am so prosperous I need never worry again! I am grateful for all that I already have, and grateful for all that I am ready to give! I keep myself lifted in high consciousness, no matter what the appearances are! God is all there is! I let the God-times roll! And so IT IS!
December 17, 2015
As a matter of fact...
I don’t turn to people, places, and things to validate my existence.
I stop looking for external signs to give me permission to be
. Deborah Johnson
Iyanla Vanzant, who I call the boss, says and very simply
"You Matter" - you are important, just by virtue of being alive
everything that you do matters to you or to someone else, there is absolutely nothing and no one you need to prove this to only to remind yourself that this is true and most importantly to believe that it is
And so, starting from this point, it makes a difference on how you approach every single thing that you do
What you do matters
How you do what you do matters
Catch that
Peace
Iyanla Vanzant, who I call the boss, says and very simply
"You Matter" - you are important, just by virtue of being alive
everything that you do matters to you or to someone else, there is absolutely nothing and no one you need to prove this to only to remind yourself that this is true and most importantly to believe that it is
And so, starting from this point, it makes a difference on how you approach every single thing that you do
What you do matters
How you do what you do matters
Catch that
Peace
December 16, 2015
The only question is where is your attention?
If you want to change, don’t fight what is already gone, go in, visualize, see, feel and live the reality that you want
Fear and doubt is what happens when you focus on what already is. What has already been created externally.
You can shift change and alter any circumstances by a shift in focus The only question is where is your attention?
– Idiliionaire
What do you do when the funk is up? When it is all in your face and starting to smell?The funk, I mean, is a low feeling, the unease, the anxiety of facing your choices and where you are?Byron Katie says "when you argue with reality you suffer" and I truly believe that, I have over the last few months, decided that I will make friends with reality. This process has been amazingly helpful, it doesn't mean I like it, it means that I accept and make choices based on that acceptance.
So the funk has been up, and fighting the funk I am losing! So I am working on another approach. I am, sitting in it and letting it pass. And therein lies the challenge - I want to "do something about it" I want to make it go away right now, I want to beat up myself, I want it to be a swift funk pass through.And so, the lesson of patience and stillness comes in and knowing that "this too shall pass" before making decisions to "do something about it"Life has a law called the Law of Opposites and that means there is a flow to life that brings ups and downs.When you are in flow things are fluid and shift happens. You get what you want - the money, the stuff, and the love. When you are in flow you get high on progress and intoxicated by possibility.When you are in the ebb its the opposite.and that is just the way it is!It does not last but boy oh boy it feels weird when I am going through itPeace
– Idiliionaire
What do you do when the funk is up? When it is all in your face and starting to smell?The funk, I mean, is a low feeling, the unease, the anxiety of facing your choices and where you are?Byron Katie says "when you argue with reality you suffer" and I truly believe that, I have over the last few months, decided that I will make friends with reality. This process has been amazingly helpful, it doesn't mean I like it, it means that I accept and make choices based on that acceptance.
So the funk has been up, and fighting the funk I am losing! So I am working on another approach. I am, sitting in it and letting it pass. And therein lies the challenge - I want to "do something about it" I want to make it go away right now, I want to beat up myself, I want it to be a swift funk pass through.And so, the lesson of patience and stillness comes in and knowing that "this too shall pass" before making decisions to "do something about it"Life has a law called the Law of Opposites and that means there is a flow to life that brings ups and downs.When you are in flow things are fluid and shift happens. You get what you want - the money, the stuff, and the love. When you are in flow you get high on progress and intoxicated by possibility.When you are in the ebb its the opposite.and that is just the way it is!It does not last but boy oh boy it feels weird when I am going through itPeace
December 15, 2015
Feelings
All you gotta do is say yes
Don't deny what you feel
Open up your mind, just rest - Floetry
Karma usually comes wearing the strangest light
It's easier to deal with that way
There's nowhere to hide, no turning back, no rearrangement
Only what lies ahead
Never stood my ground and breathed it in before
Never felt so brave and so afraid before
Never faced alone and felt the peace before
Accepting this space I'm in
Growing outta the phase where I just wanna win
Growth- I released my grief it was a heavy load
Survived the sleep and now I'm letting go
Waking up and living up to what I had proposed
A Woman now. I love the girl I used to be
Ever step she took was reaching out to me
Every breath is blessed responsibility, we made it baby
Peace
Don't deny what you feel
Open up your mind, just rest - Floetry
Karma usually comes wearing the strangest light
It's easier to deal with that way
There's nowhere to hide, no turning back, no rearrangement
Only what lies ahead
Never stood my ground and breathed it in before
Never felt so brave and so afraid before
Never faced alone and felt the peace before
Accepting this space I'm in
Growing outta the phase where I just wanna win
Growth- I released my grief it was a heavy load
Survived the sleep and now I'm letting go
Waking up and living up to what I had proposed
A Woman now. I love the girl I used to be
Ever step she took was reaching out to me
Every breath is blessed responsibility, we made it baby
Peace
December 14, 2015
An Utmost Life
Don't get stuck in an "almost" life
- Tim Storey
Brandy sings "Everybody knows almost doesn't count"
How many of us extol all the "almost's" that occurs in our life or what almost happens to us. And then after we talk about what almost happened there are either a litany of reasons why we almost did it or whose fault it was it that the action remained at almost.
So, what type of life do you desire? An "almost" life or an "utmost" life?
Peace
Brandy sings "Everybody knows almost doesn't count"
How many of us extol all the "almost's" that occurs in our life or what almost happens to us. And then after we talk about what almost happened there are either a litany of reasons why we almost did it or whose fault it was it that the action remained at almost.
So, what type of life do you desire? An "almost" life or an "utmost" life?
Peace
December 12, 2015
Boundaries
Did I respect my boundaries? Was I clear about what was okay and what's not okay?
Brene Brown
Do you have any boundaries?
Do you have any non negotiables?
Do you draw a line in the sand and stand on it or do you back up and draw a new line when the line has been crossed?
I am still learning, I am learning about setting and standing in mine
The thing is, I am very easy going, I like to keep peace and don't upset the apple cart and therein lies a window for not articulating to other people what is okay and what is not.
So this is what I have learnt, make it known to yourself what you will and will not accept, tolerate and entertain in your own space. Make that completely clear to yourself first. When you see it coming, cross the street or if it's coming into your space and you can't cross the street, speak up, speak up in the kind compassionate way that you would want to hear it. And feel no guilt about that, or make no apology, setting these boundaries its a way of earning self-trust. And when you trust yourself you can trust the process, trust life and trust other people.
And so, I am moving ahead in the class of setting boundaries, practicing makes it easier.
Say it, set them and do it with love
Peace
Do you have any boundaries?
Do you have any non negotiables?
Do you draw a line in the sand and stand on it or do you back up and draw a new line when the line has been crossed?
I am still learning, I am learning about setting and standing in mine
The thing is, I am very easy going, I like to keep peace and don't upset the apple cart and therein lies a window for not articulating to other people what is okay and what is not.
So this is what I have learnt, make it known to yourself what you will and will not accept, tolerate and entertain in your own space. Make that completely clear to yourself first. When you see it coming, cross the street or if it's coming into your space and you can't cross the street, speak up, speak up in the kind compassionate way that you would want to hear it. And feel no guilt about that, or make no apology, setting these boundaries its a way of earning self-trust. And when you trust yourself you can trust the process, trust life and trust other people.
And so, I am moving ahead in the class of setting boundaries, practicing makes it easier.
Say it, set them and do it with love
Peace
December 11, 2015
Unused Creativity is not Gentle.
Unused Creativity is not Gentle. It mestazises, It turns into grief, shame sorrow and rage
Brene Browne
I believe this with my whole heart, we were born to create, that is one of the reasons why we are here, to create and we have to power to create the life that we desire. Having courage and discipline is part of the process, without these two qualities, the process becomes so much more difficult. Brene Browne hits it here head on, unused creativity is the cause of many many challenges. We make excuses, we make up stories, we fear, we stallI also know for sure that you cannot fail, you cannot, what we consider failure is feedback, a red flag so go ahead, create, fail, try again, do it, learn, share, live laughPeace
I believe this with my whole heart, we were born to create, that is one of the reasons why we are here, to create and we have to power to create the life that we desire. Having courage and discipline is part of the process, without these two qualities, the process becomes so much more difficult. Brene Browne hits it here head on, unused creativity is the cause of many many challenges. We make excuses, we make up stories, we fear, we stallI also know for sure that you cannot fail, you cannot, what we consider failure is feedback, a red flag so go ahead, create, fail, try again, do it, learn, share, live laughPeace
December 10, 2015
Normal is so basic
Growing up I was taught that normal was the way to make it. But no, for me, normal is so basic-
Janet Mock
Don't rock the boat, toe the line, stay in your place, keep quiet and just be normal.
I have heard that so many times and even more times I have beleived it as it was either people in authority like my teachers or bosses or other people who I listened to like my parents and family.
Then it became "girl you are so weird, why don't you just do what other people do? eat some meat, drink some alcohol, live a little"
So why is it so much of a big deal when people live the way they want to live? Why does that threaten you? It's not your life! Does it affect you? your life? your living?
Does it?
Well what I have learnt is many times the ones who care about you want you to be comfortable and in their minds going out of the norm requires courage and the ability to stand on your own which may require a bit of discomfort.
Other times, people just have not tapped into the shift that living your truth is freedom, they really do not know so to them it is looked upon as crazy, why would you do something so crazy? Normal is sane and easier
Other times people are just plain nosey
I have learnt to Live your truth, and allow people to live theirs
You cannot walk someone else's path, walk yours and be a demonstration of what is possible.
Peace!
Don't rock the boat, toe the line, stay in your place, keep quiet and just be normal.
I have heard that so many times and even more times I have beleived it as it was either people in authority like my teachers or bosses or other people who I listened to like my parents and family.
Then it became "girl you are so weird, why don't you just do what other people do? eat some meat, drink some alcohol, live a little"
So why is it so much of a big deal when people live the way they want to live? Why does that threaten you? It's not your life! Does it affect you? your life? your living?
Does it?
Well what I have learnt is many times the ones who care about you want you to be comfortable and in their minds going out of the norm requires courage and the ability to stand on your own which may require a bit of discomfort.
Other times, people just have not tapped into the shift that living your truth is freedom, they really do not know so to them it is looked upon as crazy, why would you do something so crazy? Normal is sane and easier
Other times people are just plain nosey
I have learnt to Live your truth, and allow people to live theirs
You cannot walk someone else's path, walk yours and be a demonstration of what is possible.
Peace!
