Tina Gilbertson's Blog, page 3

A Simple Strategy to Make Every Day Productive

If you’re like me, you have some days when you’re the queen of your life and get forty-three things done before lunch … and others where changing out of your pajamas is the day’s biggest achievement. This is one of the many reasons I love listening to business-oriented podcasts. You can pick up gems of […]

Conflict Avoidant? Here’s What It’s Costing You

I’m bad at confronting people  — I don’t always choose the right words because I’m so nervous about having the conversation in the first place —  but I’m even worse at suffering in silence. So when something’s up between me and someone else I just have to say something, even though it’s guaranteed to be […]

On the 12th Day of Therapy…

When my partner, Mike, first heard the Christmas carol The 12 Days of Christmas as a child, he thought the “partridge in a pear tree” was something about a “juniper tree.” I’m impressed that he knew the word “juniper” before he ever heard of a partridge. My own experience with The 12 Days of Christmas […]

How Much Security Can You Stand?

Security is comfy, isn’t’ it? It’s like being able to stay home all day in your pajamas, surrounded by your stuff, knowing what to expect from the cat, the TV, and the kitchen faucet that drips once an hour. The big, ugly outside world isn’t there to bother you, or judge you, or expect anything […]

Why You’re Attracted to the Wrong People

Last week, I was giving a presentation to other mental health professionals when the talk turned to unmet emotional needs. This is the kind of thing we therapists tend to discuss when we get together. That, and reality TV shows. Or maybe that’s just me. Unmet emotional needs are often unconscious, and they cause all […]

What Scares You in Relationships?

Some of us barrel into relationships as if the very fact of being alone could cause severe itching. Others are skittish, shying away from promising new people or finding ways to engage while subtly keep them at a distance. Ultimately, the skittishness takes a toll (barreling into relationships can wreak havoc too, but that’s for […]

Do Toxic People Even Exist?

Whenever I hear the term “toxic person,” I picture a glow-in-the-dark green zombie covered in radioactive waste. Personally, I consider this to be the proper definition of a toxic person. I don’t think too many people agree with me, though. There are tons of blog posts out there, not to mention comments on Facebook and […]

Do You Have an Inner Bully?

One day, almost 20 years ago, I was standing on a corner waiting for the light to change so I could cross the street. I was spaced out, not thinking about much of anything, when I suddenly heard a faint voice inside my head. It wasn’t so much a voice as a feeling. But it […]

How to Stop Procrastinating (Or Not)

It’s ironic that it’s taken me so long to share this post with you, but hey, we therapists are only human. Scratch the surface of someone who writes about procrastination and you’ll find a procrastinator underneath. Okay, so now that I’ve outed myself as a some-time procrastinator, I’d like to share a recent post with […]

Try This New Spin on Goal-Setting

Recently I listened to an interview with Chalene Johnson, who introduced me to a new idea for goal-setting. At first I was skeptical, but when I actually went through Chalene’s steps, it worked! Here’s what she suggested: 1. Set 10 goals. WHAT? TEN goals? That’s too many, isn’t it? Trust Chalene. Write down 10 goals […]