Bart King's Blog, page 103

There are TWO places you can win a free copy of SUPERHEROES!

Just go to either (or both) of these sites to enter. It's easy!

1. Ms. Yingling Reads 

2. Smack Dab in the Middle 

That's Ms. Yingling's dog, Sylvie. She's studying up on flying!

Octopus backpack!

And that girl made it herself. Good work, Jen !
Bonus Octopus Joke
"Q. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
A. TEN-tickles."     —by Chloe Barnes, age 5
Backpack via  boing boing.

Who wants a free copy of THE BIG BOOK OF SUPERHEROES?

You? Okay, if you insist. 

Just head over to the lovely blog known as From the Mixed Up Files and leave a comment!

It can even be a really short one, like "Why would I want this lousy book?" or "I like turtles!"

German Finger Wrestling is a thing

As you can see, finger wrestling is an intense sport... the idea is to use your fingers to pull a leather band away from your opponent. Of course, judges watch carefully...
And victory is oh-so sweet!Photos by

SUPERHEROES is "funny and useful"!

There's a new review at the Florida Times-Union for The Big Book of Superheroes. It reads, in part:

... the back cover of The Big Book of Super Heroes promises to teach readers how to defend themselves against pre-school villains, invent a satisfactory battle cry and decorate secret lairs. Heady stuff, this. 

Fans expect nothing less of author Bart King, who created Big Books about spy stuff, gross stuff, girl stuff, mischief and magic — to name a few. King’s ... sense of everything silly and sublime remains intact...

As usual, it is King’s breadth that impresses ... [and makes] this book funny and useful.

Brandy Allport, May 22, 2014 

Nobody knows where this boy came from...

BUT DON'T MESS WITH HIM THIS IS CARTER HE KNOCKED ON MY DOOR asked for a banana and left

Listen, everyone—I've made a difficult decision!

After thinking about it, I've decided NOT to attend Iowa State University this year. I know, it's a disappointment . . . but this video will explain why:

I like optical illusions like this—check it!

These authors deserve capital pun-ishment!

Do any not make sense? Click on the title for background:
The Pun Also Rises, The Long Quiche Goodbye, Ska'd for Life, These Boots Are Made for Stalking, Here's Looking at Euclid, and The Toyminator. Via.

HEADLINE OF THE YEAR

"Lasagna Was Everywhere": Read the full story below the break!
The engineer of a estimated 5,000-foot-long Norfolk Southern train reportedly told police that he spotted the tractor-trailer just as he was coming under the T-Bridge. The engineer immediately applied his brakes but there was no way to avoid what happened next.The train, which was traveling at approximately 32 mph, sliced through the trailer, carrying a portion of it with it as it continued down the tracks. Cartons and boxes of frozen food spilled all over the tracks.When the train came to a stop, its cars ended up blocking most railroad crossings in the downtown area with the exception of the T-Bridge, 3rd St. and Corry Street.A massive responsive then occurred as Gaffney firefighters and police, Cherokee County Sheriff’s Office deputies, Norfolk Southern railroad personnel, the state Department of Transportation and Gaffney’s public works department all converged on the scene just as the morning rush hour was starting.South Granard Street in the area of the accident was closed completely and numerous streets had to be detoured in an attempt to keep traffic moving.The rail line was completely shut down, with one source saying all rail traffic between Charlotte, N.C. and Atlanta, Ga., was halted.Luckily, the tractor-trailer wasn’t carrying anything hazardous — just frozen food.
Despite the headaches and the massive undertaking, local officials said the response went smoothly.“I was pleased with the way everyone worked together to get this situation under control and cleaned up,” said Gaffney Fire Chief Jamie Caggiano.The chief, who still had lasagna stuck in his shoes hours after the incident, acknowledged, “This was a mess. We worked together to get the train moving as quickly as we could.”Once the remnants of the tractor trailer were removed from the tracks and railroad personnel inspected for damage, the halted Norfolk Southern train finally got under way again at about 10:45 a.m.At 11:20 a.m., Norfolk Southern officially reopened the rail line to traffic, confirmed Robin Chapman, a spokesman for Norfolk Southern.While there was nothing hazardous on the tractor-trailer, Caggiano said firefighters removed diesel fuel from the trailer’s refrigeration unit out of an abundance of caution before the wrecked tractor-trailer was dragged off the tracks.Chapman said four Norfolk Southern trains were delayed overall, with delays ranging from 1 hour 40 minutes to six hours. Chapman had not yet seen any report on damage to the locomotive when reached.A Gaffney Police Department accident report listed the locomotive’s damage as unknown, while the damage to the C.R. England Inc.-owned tractor-trailer is estimated at $150,000.There was no immediate estimate on the value of the truck’s cargo, or information about where it was being taken.The Gaffney police report does not name the driver of the tractor-trailer, though it does indicate the driver was cited. Turner said the driver was charged with obstructing a railroad crossing and added that the South Carolina State Transport Police also were called to the scene to conduct additional investigations since a commercial vehicle was involved.A call to the State Transport Police on Thursday wasn’t immediately returned.
Even with the trains moving again and most of the scene cleaned up by Wednesday afternoon, the work continued into the early evening.City firefighters went out to the scene to try and hose away the grease from the railroad crossing and roadway to alleviate any slippery conditions.“There was an inch of lasagna ground into the pavement,” Turner said. “They (the firefighters) came down with the truck to hose off the road but the water was beading up. They eventually used big buckets of detergent and brooms to scrub the roadway.”Even when the shattered tractor-trailer was towed away, Turner said, it still caused problems. It got snagged on a telephone line near the Five-Points intersection prompting yet another response by police and firefighters.“As I hope you can understand, we can’t comment on accidents so long as there is an investigation in process, other than to say we will cooperate fully with authorities as they investigate,” offered David Allred, a spokesman for the C.R. England trucking company. “We are grateful that no one was seriously injured and certainly express regret for any inconvenience caused to drivers and neighbors in the area and for any property damage caused by the accident.”There was no immediate estimate for the costs of the cleanup.Turner added that the roadway detours and shutdowns no doubt inconvenienced several businesses. “But for public safety we had to block off that whole section,” he said.