Alan Fadling's Blog, page 51

Podcast 185: What Does Your Soul Love? Part 2 (Summer of Unhurried Favorites)

Over the summer, we are sharing ten episodes of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today we’re sharing “What Does Your Soul Love, Part 2.” In this episode Gem and I unpack the second four of the eight questions from our book, "What Does Your Soul Love?". We address the themes of pain, fear, control and joy. It’s really in learning to live these questions rather than seeking quick-fix answers to them that we are transformed.

We also wanted to let you know that beginning in September, Unhurried Living will give birth to a brand-new podcast, hosted by me, called “I Can Do That!” I’ll help you see the big picture and take your next step so you can transform hopes into habits. In each episode I’ll share one practical idea, with one simple takeaway.

Alan will host the Unhurried Living Podcast. He will continue to interview fellow authors on themes related to An Unhurried Life. He’ll also share round table discussions with members of the Unhurried Living community on the values and practices of unhurried leadership.

 

 

Gazing: The Artist Is Present

One of my (Gem) favorite activities as a child was going fishing with my dad on the beautiful Washougal River in Washington. Before we put on our gear and walked across the street to our fishing hole, it was my job to find worms in our garden. It was like a wriggly scavenger hunt. I would dig down into the rich, dark brown soil on a search for squiggly bait. I didn’t even care if I got dirt under my fingernails. Ah, the carefree life of a child in nature.

 

When I recall my childhood, I get in touch with a much simpler time. If I close my eyes, I can picture the garden, the dirt, the worms, and even my little darkened fingernails. I had so much leisure as a child. Pure time. No hurry. Go get worms? Okay.

 

Once we made our way to the river, my dad was really the only one who fished. He would set me up with my own rod and I might fish for a while.

 

But what I really liked to do was search for water skeeters in the eddies along the edge of the river. I’d crouch down on the rocks and watch the skeeters skate along the surface of the water. They moved surprisingly fast and were quite engaging.

 

Only a child would spend that much time gazing at something so small and seemingly insignificant. But I had the time then to really take it in. I was seeing the skeeters. I was experiencing them. And it was pure enjoyment.

 

Now there’s a word for you: GAZING. When was the last time you gazed at something? Maybe a sunset or a sleeping child? In your life, what makes you stop and gaze?

 

A while back I became aware of the performance artist Marina Abramovic. For three months in 2010 she sat in a room at the Museum of Modern Art in New York. She made herself available to be present and to gaze into people’s eyes. Some officials told her that she would be sitting there alone most of the time, that no one would show up. But it turned out to be exactly the opposite.

 

The extra chair was never empty. The room was always full, and people even slept on the street in order to get a turn to be in her presence and simply stare . . . to gaze.

 

Why?

 

In Abramovic’s words, there is “this enormous need of humans to actually have contact. . . . We are so alienated from each other. . . . Society makes us really distant. We are texting each other messages without seeing each other and we just live around the corner from each other. [There are] so many stories of loneliness.”

 

People would sit in the chair and cry. While there were probably many different reasons for their tears, my guess is that the main reason they cried was in response to the presence Marina provided. She prepared herself to be a peaceful, loving container for whatever needed to be expressed in those minutes. That was at least one of the purposes of the art piece. To provide presence and a meaningful gaze.

 

Presence. Gazing. It’s one thing to receive that gift from an artist like Marina. It is another to receive the gaze of the True Artist, Jesus himself, and to gaze upon him.

 

What do you sense if you close your eyes and picture the gaze of Jesus? My hope is that, no matter who you are or what you’ve done, you will realize that you are seen in love. God is love, which means Jesus is love. Which means this is his posture toward you. Always and first, there is love.

 

Reflection 

How might you experience Jesus’ loving gaze today?
How might you then become a loving presence for those around you?
It might be good to take some time today to process this. It can be as simple as reminding yourself that you are looked upon always and first in love and then returning the favor by looking upon them in love.

 

This might be easier if you try to return to the simplicity of a child—just like my younger self, who had all the time in the world to dig for worms and gaze at skeeters in the river. That same spacious time is available to you today.

 

Click the Marina Abramovic link and be sure to watch the gentleman who sits down at the 1:16 minute mark. It’s quite moving.

Podcast 184: What Does Your Soul Love? Part 1 (Summer of Unhurried Favorites)

Over the summer, we are sharing ten episodes of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today we’re sharing “What Does Your Soul Love, Part 1.” In this episode Alan and I unpack the first four of the eight questions from our book, "What Does Your Soul Love?". We address the themes of desire, resistance, vulnerability and truth. It’s really in learning to live these questions rather than seeking quick-fix answers to them that we are transformed.

We also wanted to let you know that beginning in September, Unhurried Living will give birth to a brand-new podcast, hosted by me, called “I Can Do That!” I’ll help you see the big picture and take your next step so you can transform hopes into habits. In each episode I’ll share one practical idea, with one simple takeaway.

Alan will host the Unhurried Living Podcast. He will continue to interview fellow authors on themes related to An Unhurried Life. He’ll also share round table discussions with members of the Unhurried Living community on the values and practices of unhurried leadership.

 

My First Experience of Unhurried Time with God

I (Alan) often share the story of my first experience of solitude and silence on January 19, 1990. It was led by one of my mentors, Wayne Anderson, as part of a class I was taking at Fuller Seminary. I tell a little of that story in chapter 2 of An Unhurried Life, but until now I have never shared the full journal entry from that day. It was the first page of my journal, which today, over thirty years later, runs more than eleven thousand pages.

 

That journal has chronicled my attempt to practice a long obedience in the same direction of unhurried time with God. I hope this first entry encourages you in your own journey of following Jesus into lonely places to pray (Luke 5:16). (Note: I’ve used only first names, and where necessary I changed those names for reasons of privacy.)

 

An Unhurried Day 

January 19, 1990. Yesterday was our extended personal communion time with the Lord. We met out at a church in Whittier. It was an incredible day. Chris was able to join me for the day. It was good to talk with him on the one-hour drive there and back (more about that later).

 

We started the day with some instruction from Wayne Anderson out of John 10—the Good Shepherd passage. It was gold! The three main points were (1) that we know Jesus in the same way that Jesus knows the Father, (2) that we listen to Jesus’ voice, and (3) we follow Jesus. It is so simple and yet so perspective changing.

 

One of the challenges of the day was to take 75 minutes to “be alone with Jesus.” It was not a time for Bible study or intercessory prayer, which are great and necessary, but a time for just being open to Jesus. We were to listen to Him and be open to what He might wish to bring to our hearts and minds.

 

I started out by just walking for the first 10 or 15 minutes. I didn’t have many thoughts in my mind, but I just occasionally said in my heart that I was open to hear what Jesus might want to say. After walking quite a while, I sensed that Jesus was saying to talk with Chris about my past struggles with lust. He wanted me to share according to James 5:16 (“confess,” “pray,” “be healed”), and He wanted me to start from the beginning and share right up to the present.

 

At first, the idea of sharing these things with Chris seemed a bit much, and I wrestled with God. I wasn’t very willing to do it. I allowed the thought to go away, but it just kept coming back. It seemed that Jesus was intent on my making a confession. He also seemed to say that I need to tell my friend Mike.

 

Another thought that came to my mind were the words “stop running.” It seemed to me that this was Jesus trying to show me how I have been trying to run away from Him over the last few months. I felt unwelcome and so I was running away from God. Unhurried time learns to rest in the Presence.

 

After walking a while, I lay down in some grass that covered the hillside. As I was lying there, a very vivid thought picture came to my mind. It seemed that I heard the sentence, “I come to God with my ears plugged when I pray.” As I thought more about it, I could picture myself in the past, coming to God with my massive prayer list and rattling it off to Him as if He didn’t already know about these things. I saw that most of my praying recently has been a monologue, not a dialogue.

 

Finally, one last picture that I saw in my mind was that of a spinning bowl. The thought seemed to be that the bowl was the world, and that the centrifugal force of the spinning bowl was driving me away from Jesus at the center of the bowl. Jesus seemed to be inviting me to the center. As I interpreted this thought throughout the day, it seemed that the walls of the bowl were all of the things that I’ve been doing to “keep busy for God.”

 

Reflection Questions 

Have you experimented with extended times alone with God like I shared in this story?
If so, how meaningful has that experience been?
If not, do you feel drawn to time with God like this?
How might Jesus be inviting you to try on (or continue) this practice? When and where might you do this?

 

Photo by Kai Dahms on Unsplash

Podcast 183: The Common Rule (Alan with Justin Whitmel Earley (Summer of Unhurried Favorites)

Over the summer, we are sharing ten episodes of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today we’re sharing “The Common Rule” with author Justin Whitmel Earley. A key focus for continually cooperating with the transforming work of God both in us and through us is to develop a Spirit-guided and Spirit-empowered rule or rhythm of life. Learning to cultivate simple and regular habits that help us cooperate with the work God is doing is us is strategic. 

We also wanted to let you know that beginning in September, Unhurried Living will give birth to a brand-new podcast, called “I Can Do That!” and it will be hosted by Gem. [Gem will help you see the big picture and take your next step so you can transform hopes into habits. In each episode [she’ll/I’ll] share one practical idea, with one simple takeaway. 

Alan will host the Unhurried Living Podcast. He will continue to interview fellow authors on themes related to An Unhurried Life. He’ll also share round table discussions with members of the Unhurried Living community on the values and practices of unhurried leadership.

 

You can get a free chapter of Justin's book, "The Common Rule" by signing up on our website. If you’ve downloaded free podcast bonuses before, you can access this one and all previous resources by signing on to your Unhurried Living library. Enjoy!

 

The Process of Creativity

I (Gem) recently turned in the first draft of my second book. Writing is such a weirdly organic dynamic that has its own dramatic progression. Way back at the beginning I gathered some notes, tried to organize them, and even wrote new material for the introduction.

 

Then I had an idea that shifted me away from my original outline, and I got confused. I could no longer feel or see the form of the book. I was at a standstill. The shape was shifting inside me but I couldn’t grasp it. That is a very scary part of writing, especially when you have a deadline. It feels like a black hole, and making your way back out into the writing space seems impossible.

 

Slowly, over the course of many weeks, the original outline began to make sense to me again and I reworked the form. But I was still missing that intangible “connection” to the project. It’s so subjective, I know. But there is a place inside me that desires to see the whole before I can make progress on the parts.

 

Thanks to a writing retreat in Utah, I was able to focus on the project, and I finally achieved a settled sense of the whole and of the flow. I was finally able to prune and order my content and compose a few thousand words.

 

Writing is hard work. Don’t ever let anyone tell you differently. A friend shared the following quote from Henri Nouwen with me:

 

“Writing is a process in which we discover what lives in us. The writing itself reveals to us what is alive in us. The deepest satisfaction of writing is precisely that it opens up new spaces within us of which we were not aware before we started to write. To write is to embark on a journey whose final destination we do not know. Thus, writing requires a real act of trust. We have to say to ourselves: ‘I do not yet know what I carry in my heart, but I trust that it will emerge as I write.’ Writing is like giving away the few loaves and fishes one has, trusting that they will multiply in the giving. Once we dare to ‘give away’ on paper the few thoughts that come to us, we start discovering how much is hidden underneath those thoughts and gradually come in touch with our own riches and resources.” (Henri Nouwen, Spiritual Direction, p. 99)

 

This is exactly what the writing process feels like to me. An exercise in trust. And even if you aren’t a writer, my guess is you will recognize the dynamic Nouwen speaks of.

 

We all create something. Whatever our job or responsibilities, we are all called to bring forth life from within us to share with others. It may be baking, podcasting, speaking, painting, or other creative hobbies. The creative process is alive and it takes time.

 

I want to encourage you to keep holding on. If you are at the beginning, enjoy the excitement of a fresh start. If you are in the messy middle, hang in there and let the process continue to unfold. If you are nearing the finish line, let me say, “You can do it!”

 

Reflection

Where are you in your creative process right now? What does that feel like?
How might you enjoy where you are in the process, even if it’s the messy middle?

Photo by Luca Onniboni on Unsplash

Podcast 182: The Next Right Thing (Gem with Emily P. Freeman) (Summer of Unhurried Favorites)

Over the summer, we are sharing ten episodes of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today we’re sharing “The Next Right Thing with Emily P. Freeman.” Emily is another trusted and wise voice and any of you who listen to her podcast know this. In our conversation we discuss being ourselves, the writing process, listening to our bodies, the idea of receiving people, and serving from overflow.

Today, we are going to talk about being exactly who you are wherever you go and sharing from that centered place. We also talk a bit about writing, listening to our bodies, the overflow nature of leadership and more.

Emily made our "Unhurried Favorites" list as today, July 5, 2021, marks the six moth anniversary of her "The Next Right Thing Guided Journal".  Although the podcast episode does not talk about the journal itself, it is a tremendous resource that has aided many on their journey.

We hope you enjoy this episode and please do connect with and follow Emily on Instagram @emilypfreeman.

Restoration: Treasuring What's Valuable

There’s a world of difference between restoring something and buying something new. I once received a wonderful birthday gift of a brand-new Pitt Minion NIV Bible bound in goatskin leather. It’s a treasure I hope to enjoy for the rest of my life.

 

But a while back, a friend of mine who is a pastor brought his favorite old preaching Bible to a specialist for restoration. Rather than throwing it out and buying a new one, he took the Bible to a shop that would carefully return the well-worn book to fine condition. They mended its torn pages, replaced its worn cover, strengthened its loose bindings, and so forth, with the goal of restoring its intended beauty and usefulness. It makes me think of a line that occurs three times in Psalm 80:

 

Restore us, O God;
    let your face shine, that we may be saved. (vv. 3, 7, 19 NRSV)

 

No one wants to restore trash. However, when something is old and worn but still valuable, a loving owner wants to restore it. Asaph, the writer of Psalm 80, wants God to bring restoration to his people. He wants God’s gracious favor to shine on them so that they might be saved—made whole and holy.

 

I believe God does this by giving us a truer vision of himself that inspires and energizes our lives and brings us the restoration he intends for us to experience.

 

Restoration in Good Soil

 

Later in the Psalm 80, Asaph makes this statement:

 

You brought a vine out of Egypt;
    you drove out the nations and planted it.
You cleared the ground for it;
    it took deep root and filled the land.
The mountains were covered with its shade,
    the mighty cedars with its branches;
it sent out its branches to the sea,
    and its shoots to the River. (vv. 8–11 NRSV)

 

Just as God brought his people Israel out of Egypt and planted them in a good land, part of his restoring work in us involves planting us in a good place and tending our lives so that we might become more fruitful. He wants our lives to bless more and more people.

 

I find a prayer rising up within me in response:

 

Jesus, grant that I might become more and more fully, deeply, and solely rooted in you for my life and my work. May I be enabled to resist the draw of every false vine that makes big, empty promises to me. Show me how to bring my thirsty roots to you and you alone. May I be so filled that even a trickle of living water flowing from me becomes a torrent. I cannot do this on my own. You can do this in and through me. It is what I want. Amen!

 

Reflection Questions 

Where do you feel broken or damaged and in need of God’s gracious restoring work?
How would you like to invite God to do this work in you?
What might your restored life look like?
How might your life become a greater blessing to others as a result?

Photo by Dietmar Becker on Unsplash

Podcast 181: Attachment to God (Alan & Gem with Jim Wilder) (Summer of Unhurried Favorites)

Over the summer, we are sharing ten episodes of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today we’re sharing “Attachment to God” with author Jim Wilder. Gem and I had an encouraging and very helpful conversation with Jim about his book Renovated. We loved how Jim unpacked how our relationship with God and our formation into the likeness of Christ is rooted in connection with God. 

Christian faith has often focused on right beliefs and right choices as the key to personal growth. But biblical evidence and modern brain science show that our character is shaped more by whom we love than merely by what we believe. 

In Renovated, Jim Wilder shows us how we can train our brains to relate to God based on joyful, mutual attachment, leading to emotional and spiritual maturity, as our identity and character are formed by our relationship with God. 

Dr. Jim Wilder is a neurotheologian, training leaders and counselors for over 30 years on five continents. The founder of Life Model Works, he is an expert on the intersection of theology and brain science. He is coauthor of Rare Leadership and Living from the Heart Jesus Gave You. 

You can also connect with Jim via social on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

 

You can get a free chapter of Jim's book, "Renovated: God, Dallas Willard, and the Church that Transforms" by signing up on our website. If you’ve downloaded free podcast bonuses before, you can access this one and all previous resources by signing on to your Unhurried Living library. Enjoy!

 

Three Simple Words

As an author, words are important to me (Gem). Below are three words that have become especially meaningful to me recently. My prayer is that at least one of them will encourage you today.

 

Word #1—DELIGHT

 

A few years ago Alan and I attended the baptism of one of the newest members of our church community—a six-month-old boy. He had been long awaited and is much beloved by his parents and extended family. I follow his mom on Instagram and see the photos of him that she posts, and I must say that as a baby he had a unique face. So expressive, inquisitive, cherubic—almost like a little man. It’s a delight to watch him grow and see the love his parents shower on him.

 

As our bishop was holding the infant so that he could pour the water over his head, the baby leaned his head way back, as if in expectation. The entire congregation gasped and then giggled as this sweet one contorted his body. So much love. So much delight. Overwhelming love was directed at this one innocent, perfectly created little human.

 

I was not related to this child in any way, and yet I felt overwhelming delight. My mind immediately turned to God my Father. Can I imagine that God, my own Creator, might have that same sense of delight in me?

 

The delight in the room on that Sunday was so palpable and such a gift. I think it may have been the invitation I needed to believe at a deeper level that I am indeed a delight to God. If as mere mortals we take such delight in a little child, then God surely is capable of much greater love for and delight in us.

 

REFLECT: Are there ways in which you still struggle to believe that you are a delight to God and that you really are delightful? How would it change your view of yourself if you lived from such a place? How would it affect the quality of your relationships, your work, your life?

 

Word #2—ENOUGH

 

By now it’s no secret that I struggle with anxiety. On any given day I catch myself fretting at least once. Although I have learned to manage this much better in recent years, I’ve come to understand that I’m usually in that mode because I don’t think I have enough time to attend to the things that need to get done.

 

One time when this occurred, I stopped in my tracks and asked myself, “Do you have enough time?” I repeated slowly. “Enough. Time.” Of course I have enough time. I actually have more than enough time. So why am I acting like I don’t? There was no good answer to that question.

 

REFLECT: Do I have enough time to accomplish my work in peace? Do I have enough time to love the person in front of me? Do I have enough time for rest? And what is enough to eat? What is enough to own? What is enough to do? What is enough to know?

 

Word #3—HERE

 

In my practice of contemplative prayer, I typically choose to focus on words like God, Jesus, or love. But lately a new word has opened to me and has proven helpful in bringing my mind back to focus on God’s presence: here.

 

When I say this word out loud, I enjoy a sense of comfort, peace, and presence. With one small, simple word I remember to rein in my thoughts and simply occupy the space in which I am sitting. I am here. God is here. That’s all that matters in this moment of prayer.

 

It’s nice to feel small once in a while. Grand plans and ideas for my life and work are fine, but simple presence is a true gift.

 

REFLECT: What does being here mean to you? In what ways can you experience the power of being right here, right now? How can you be more here in your relationships and work?

 

I hope one of these words proves helpful to you today. Feel free to use some of the reflection questions to spark prayer and discernment in your current season.

 

May these words open us to new levels of knowing the love and presence of God in our real, everyday lives.

 

Photo by Daniel Thomas on Unsplash