Alan Fadling's Blog, page 82

Podcast: Copying a True Master – The Essence of Apprenticeship



A visit to a museum provides the backdrop for a conversation on what it means to be an apprentice to a master.

We made our way through quite a few rooms of the Hermitage. The interiors were jaw dropping, the paintings gorgeous. And, as Alan said, he had been there before, so he knew when we were nearing the original painting we were most looking forward to seeing, which was Rembrandt’s Prodigal Son. He gave me a brief warning as we turned the corner, “Get ready.” We rounded the corner and entered the room completely devoted to Rembrandt’s paintings. There it was, on its own wall, as we walked through the doorway. The original. Breathtaking. I waited a bit for the crowd to clear so I could get a close-up view for myself. A masterful work of art, depicting essential truths: The Father is waiting. He never gives up. He loves me. He is generous.

Join Gem and Alan as they share their experience of being in a room full of Remrandts.

Subscribe on iTunes or Stitcher

Join us on Patreon!

Become a Patron

Those of you who listen to our podcast know that we are creating a worldwide conversation at the intersection of deeper spiritual life and broader personal influence. That’s what we mean by Unhurried Living.

In an age where hurry, distraction and busyness are rampant, we share a different message: Rest Deeper. Live Fuller. Lead Better.

We need your help to keep this work going–and to make it better. So we invite you to join us as a partner on Patreon.com.

We want to release the same high-caliber, high-value episodes to you, but with even more excellence. We want to create even more conversations, prayers, interviews and 5-minute retreats for a more gracious, thoughtful approach to your life.

Our podcast will always be free to all listeners, but by subscribing to Patreon you can help–your monthly subscription helps us grow our team, pay for the hard costs of producing our work, and makes it possible for us to spread our message globally. You can partner with us for as little as $1 a month.

Plus, depending on your subscription, you’ll get access to some resources and opportunities available only to our patron community, like:

A copy of our talking points and notes for each episode.
Access to a members only Patreon feed.
An extra 10-minute “inside track” after-episode podcast, where we unpack the podcast theme further.
Helping us choose topics and respond to questions for future episodes.
A 20% discount for all of Unhurried Living online courses.

Help us produce the work you already love–become a subscriber today. We thank you in advance for becoming a part of our community. So head on over to patreon.com/unhurriedliving and become a patron today!

The post Podcast: Copying a True Master – The Essence of Apprenticeship appeared first on Unhurried Living.

Lessons in Distraction, Compulsion and a Busy Mind

At the beginning of Lent, Alan let you in on our plans for this season (aka, a surefire way to cause unwanted and unplanned media loss withdrawals). I’m kidding…but only a little. (If you didn’t read that post, you can see it on our website here.)

You would think, wouldn’t you, that people who run an organization called Unhurried Living wouldn’t have issues with cultural pressures like social media imagery envy or binge watching unnecessary shows on Netflix, right?

I want to clarify here that our choice is not simply about fasting from certain media or screens. It is about leaning into the process that Alan has been teaching for years: the difference between the cycle of Driven Achievement / Mind-Numbing Escape, and the cycle of Work is Given / Rest is Given. (See An Unhurried Life, chapter 7).

I thought I would give you a real-life update (including a confession) on my process in this first half of Lent.

Thursday, the day after Ash Wednesday, was our first real day of fasting from mind-numbing escape in the evening. Here are a few of the reasons I compulsively reached for, and then realized I had chosen not to reach for, my phone:

Text sons regarding dinner. (I had to walk upstairs and talk to them in person.)
Check the weather. (Had to wait until the next day to figure out what to wear.)
Take a photo of the lovely candles I lit for ambience while I read (Do I always have to be interesting and inspiring, even in mundane events like lighting candles? Too much pressure.)
Order a coloring book on Amazon. (That’ll help pass the time.)
Check the time. (Must solve the fact that my phone is my clock.)

Because I was nervous about having “nothing to do” but read in the evenings, I decided to move my workouts to just prior to dinner. (That’ll pass the time, I thought). Just this one small move has reinvigorated my entire day. I can move easily through my morning routine into my workflow, and before dinner I get to cardio-dance-it-up.

By Saturday after Ash Wednesday, the need for the phone seemed to quiet some, simply by unhooking from it for two evenings. And on Sunday, it wasn’t until the end of the day that I realized that I had not checked social media even once. I felt lighter inside. It turns out that all that mindless scrolling is not actually peaceful.

It was five days into Lent and I could report that my compulsive need for my phone had subsided greatly. For work, I still use my phone all day, but only as necessary. At night, my questions go unanswered (Who was that guy in that great movie from 1995? Who cares?). My vain need to be interesting for social media gets a rest. And I wait until the next morning to find out what the weather will be so I can decide what to wear.

Before you begin to think this all sounds too spiritual and easy, let me say that… you are correct.

The very next day Alan left for the Dominican Republic. I then promptly rationalized that I could not possibly keep the evenings media free without someone else in the house doing the same thing (in case you forgot, I am a busy minded extrovert). Alan’s grounding presence was removed, and I could not foresee continuing the process while he was gone.

So, you know how some say that you get one day off a week in Lent from your fast? Well, I took all of those days and smushed them together in Alan’s absence. Yes. I broke my Lenten fast for one week. Even as I write these words, I can feel the shame rising in my belly.

I really wish I could say that I am a paragon of self-control and that, as the days went by, I didn’t miss my mind-numbing escape. But I did.

At this point, half way through Lent, I am experiencing what I can only call withdrawal. Remember, at the beginning, I mentioned driven achievement and mind-numbing escape. It appears that I still struggle with this pattern. But Lent is like a huge flashlight shining a light into my soul. And a still, small voice is whispering, “Work is given. Rest is given.”

A couple of Sundays ago, our pastor gave an inspiring sermon about Lent. He said that it was good to narrow the focus of our lives for a bit, keeping it simple. He also said that it is good to have a “beginner’s mind” about things: no fear of mistakes; it’s ok to try things, fail and try again; there are no dumb questions, etc.

He said that Lent is really about creating space in our lives so that we can be the bearer of this alternative possibility: I am a beloved child of a redeeming God.

So, after all of my confessing, the real question is, will I continue creating this space in my life? And will I remember, under all of this, that I am a beloved child of a redeeming God?

Maybe it’s not perfection that is to be achieved in Lent–maybe it’s direction, intention, uncovering, confessing, failing, and trying again.

I am in the trying again part. If you have been struggling with your Lenten journey, it’s okay. No judgments here. Just pick it back up and try again. Let’s hear the wisdom again…

Lent is really about creating space in our lives so that we can be the bearer of this alternative possibility: I am a beloved child of a redeeming God. (Todd Hunter)

All jokes and confessions about Lent, social media, binge watching shows and phone addiction aside, I am choosing to create space in my life so that more of the goodness of God can sink in. I do actually long to be the bearer of this alternative possibility:

I am a beloved child of a redeeming God.

And so are you.

 

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

The post Lessons in Distraction, Compulsion and a Busy Mind appeared first on Unhurried Living.

Podcast: Eight Simple Ways to Bless People

In this mini-sode, we want to share eight simple ways for blessing others. These are actually drawn from a resource we produced a year ago, called “Take Five: 17 Simple Ways to Serve Others.” That was before we launched this podcast, so I wanted to share some of the helpful ideas with you all.

These little “five minute” ideas aren’t complex. That’s actually the point. You could easily add plenty of other creative ways to bless another. We simply encourage you to do the good that God has put in your heart for the benefit of another.

These mini-ministries can be done as you live your real, day-to-day life, including emailing, grocery shopping, driving, doing laundry and washing dishes.

Subscribe on iTunes or Stitcher

Join us on Patreon!

Become a Patron

Those of you who listen to our podcast know that we are creating a worldwide conversation at the intersection of deeper spiritual life and broader personal influence. That’s what we mean by Unhurried Living.

In an age where hurry, distraction and busyness are rampant, we share a different message: Rest Deeper. Live Fuller. Lead Better.

We need your help to keep this work going–and to make it better. So we invite you to join us as a partner on Patreon.com.

We want to release the same high-caliber, high-value episodes to you, but with even more excellence. We want to create even more conversations, prayers, interviews and 5-minute retreats for a more gracious, thoughtful approach to your life.

Our podcast will always be free to all listeners, but by subscribing to Patreon you can help–your monthly subscription helps us grow our team, pay for the hard costs of producing our work, and makes it possible for us to spread our message globally. You can partner with us for as little as $1 a month.

Plus, depending on your subscription, you’ll get access to some resources and opportunities available only to our patron community, like:

A copy of our talking points and notes for each episode.
Access to a members only Patreon feed.
An extra 10-minute “inside track” after-episode podcast, where we unpack the podcast theme further.
Helping us choose topics and respond to questions for future episodes.
A 20% discount for all of Unhurried Living online courses.

Help us produce the work you already love–become a subscriber today. We thank you in advance for becoming a part of our community. So head on over to patreon.com/unhurriedliving and become a patron today!

The post Podcast: Eight Simple Ways to Bless People appeared first on Unhurried Living.

Lent: An Invitation to True Satisfaction

I love when a passage of scripture becomes a defining text for a chapter of your life. Lately, Isaiah 55 has been such a passage for me. I unpacked the first few verses in chapter 3 of An Unhurried Leader (titled, “Leading in His Presence.”). I love the invitational language of God here. In the season of Lent, this is an invitation to true satisfaction.

A couple of weeks ago, I led a morning retreat based on this text. And last week, I shared these insights with a number of leaders in the Dominican Republic. I’ve often been drawn to a question in this passage that I think God wants to ask each of us:

Isaiah 55:2

Why spend money on what is not bread,

            and your labor on what does not satisfy?

Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,

            And you will delight in the richest of fare.

It’s a good question, isn’t it? Why indeed? Why do I spend my money the way I do? Why do I work so hard? What are my aims? Do I sometimes wake up and realize that a lot of my spending and working is actually empty and unsatisfying?

What am I actually seeking in the ways I spend my money? Am I trying to purchase something that will fill my soul? There is nothing I can purchase that is substantial or sizeable enough to do that. What does my hard work seek to acquire or achieve?

We find ourselves again in Lent. It’s a good time to ask a question like Isaiah’s. In Lent, rather than aiming at acquisition, we aim for some form of openness or even empty space. Fasting results in empty stomachs. Self-denial can quiet our selfish ambition.

But the empty here isn’t a vacuum. It is a welcoming of God’s presence. We open up space for God to be active in and through us. We seek to become quiet so that we can hear whatever He might wish to say.

In church language, we often talk about what we have to spend in ministry in terms of time, talent and treasure. Perhaps the first two speak to how we work. The last certainly seems a way of talking about how we spend our money.

What would it look like to spend our resources or expend our effort in a way that leads to true fullness? How could our spending and working lead to abundance, not just for ourselves but to enable us to easily bless others?

So Lent is more about entering in than just avoiding something. Lent is an opportunity to rest rather than strive. Lent could be about contentment rather than desperate attempts to fill our souls from the outside.

Enter in…find rest…enjoy contentment

For Reflection:

How might these weeks of Lent leading up to Easter be a season for looking at how you spend your money or expend your effort? What are you try to get?

How satisfied have you been with our purchases or achievements?

If you’ve taken on a Lenten discipline, in what way, if any, does this Isaiah 55 question speak to you?

 

Photo by Patrick Fore on Unsplash

The post Lent: An Invitation to True Satisfaction appeared first on Unhurried Living.

Podcast: Carry Prayer – An Effective Way to Pray for Others

Many years ago, I (Gem) was having a conversation with a very dear friend. As we interacted, she shared some insights about me that I had not directly told her before. No one could have known, because I had not shared with anyone. She was quite observant, but I was still surprised when she shared with me her thoughts. I asked her how she knew. She said, “I know you because I pray for you.”

I didn’t really understand that fully at the time, but over the years I began to learn what she meant. The Lord had obviously led her to pray things for me that were core for me at the time.

How is it possible to pray for someone that deeply without having been given a specific prayer request? What would it look like for Jesus invite us into his thoughts, ideas and desires for another person? How can we cooperate with Him as we pray for our friends and family?

Using the text from Luke 5, we can practice carrying others to Jesus. He knows them, loves them, and will meet them right where they are.

Subscribe on iTunes or Stitcher

Join us on Patreon!

Become a Patron

Those of you who listen to our podcast know that we are creating a worldwide conversation at the intersection of deeper spiritual life and broader personal influence. That’s what we mean by Unhurried Living.

In an age where hurry, distraction and busyness are rampant, we share a different message: Rest Deeper. Live Fuller. Lead Better.

We need your help to keep this work going–and to make it better. So we invite you to join us as a partner on Patreon.com.

We want to release the same high-caliber, high-value episodes to you, but with even more excellence. We want to create even more conversations, prayers, interviews and 5-minute retreats for a more gracious, thoughtful approach to your life.

Our podcast will always be free to all listeners, but by subscribing to Patreon you can help–your monthly subscription helps us grow our team, pay for the hard costs of producing our work, and makes it possible for us to spread our message globally. You can partner with us for as little as $1 a month.

Plus, depending on your subscription, you’ll get access to some resources and opportunities available only to our patron community, like:

A copy of our talking points and notes for each episode.
Access to a members only Patreon feed.
An extra 10-minute “inside track” after-episode podcast, where we unpack the podcast theme further.
Helping us choose topics and respond to questions for future episodes.
A 20% discount for all of Unhurried Living online courses.

Help us produce the work you already love–become a subscriber today. We thank you in advance for becoming a part of our community. So head on over to patreon.com/unhurriedliving and become a patron today!

The post Podcast: Carry Prayer – An Effective Way to Pray for Others appeared first on Unhurried Living.

There’s No Time Like the Present

“I don’t have time for this!”

I gritted my teeth and barked at my 5-year-old. I was in a hurry to get somewhere and my son had forgotten his shoes in the house. He ran to get them and I fumed. As I pulled out of the driveway, the sentence I had barked haunted me, “I don’t have time for this!”

I don’t have time for this? I was a stay-at-home mom at the time. If I didn’t have time to care for my sons, what in the world did I have time for? That sentence began a work in my heart to change my orientation to time.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens… (Ecclesiastes 3:1, NIV)

Hurry has been a temptation in each season of my life. It is an unbidden tendency that can run in the background of just about any situation. Back then, it showed up in my negative talk about myself, and my too high expectations of myself and those around me.

It can be easy to find ourselves under the pressure of all we do for others. Sometimes, it’s not even that heroic. We are simply under the demands that we place on ourselves…demands that may or may not have anything to do with what others want or need.

My life has been one long lesson in patience, trust and grace. So…

What if I had a broader view of time?
What if I thought seasonally in addition to daily?
What if the time I was given was actually enough?
What if I could live at the pace of grace?

As I mentioned in my last post, all throughout nature we see the examples of process: cycles of life, death and renewal. We can have such a view of our own lives. Each of us moving beautifully through our own processes, giving grace to ourselves along the way. What if we allowed the seasons of our lives to ebb and flow? How might we move more graciously through our days?

A while back, a wise friend of mine shared, “Life does not come at me. It comes to me.” Shifting those two little prepositions can make a world of difference. Can I come out from under my own demands and enjoy the process? That question might have prevented me from barking at my son about his forgotten shoes all those years ago.

Life does not come at me. It comes to me.

Quite a few years ago I stumbled upon an invention called The Present. The hand of the clock takes one year to make its way in a complete circle. Just looking at the way the colors fade from one to the next helps me to take a deep breath. Since then, they have added another clock called Today. There are no numbers. Simply colors and one hand that moves around the dial in 24 hours.

For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. (Ecclesiastes 3:1, NLT)

With the images of The Present in mind (see pic above), let’s ponder a few questions…

How do the blending of color and season affect your perception of time?
How does this compare with your view of a traditional clock with numbers denoting hours?
How can this contrast help you with your inner pace?

As you give some thought to your own inner pace…

What do you notice?
What is the speed of your thoughts? Your heart?
Do you need to pick up the pace or slow it down?

Giving attention to our inner pace can open us up to a whole new level of grace…grace embraced and grace extended.

Spend just a few moments with Jesus in some silence. Linger in these questions with Him. Allow Him to show you what grace He may have for you.

Remember, life does not come at you, it comes to you. What will you do with your time today?

Peace to you as you seek to be more present today.

The post There’s No Time Like the Present appeared first on Unhurried Living.

Podcast: Emily P. Freeman – Small Moment Living in a Fast Moving World

Today, it is my delight to share a conversation that I had with Emily P. Freeman. As I’ve followed her on Instagram, read her blog and enjoyed her podcast – I’ve found her to be a true kindred spirit. She is singing the same song as as Unhurried Living – as she shares the message of small moment living in a fast moving world.

In our conversation we talk about: story, process, spiritual practices, small moment living, making connections between our outer world and our inner world and more.

A little about Emily – She is a writer, creative director, and spiritual mentor who helps create space for the soul to breathe so people can walk in step with their calling. She is the Wall Street Journal bestselling author of Simply Tuesday and Grace for the Good Girl as well as Graceful and A Million Little Ways. She’s been writing online for over 10 years and is the co-founder of a growing community for writers at hopewriters.com. Emily and her husband live in North Carolina with their three children. Connect with Emily online at emilypfreeman.com and on Instagram @emilypfreeman.

Subscribe on iTunes or Stitcher

Join us on Patreon!

Become a Patron

Those of you who listen to our podcast know that we are creating a worldwide conversation at the intersection of deeper spiritual life and broader personal influence. That’s what we mean by Unhurried Living.

In an age where hurry, distraction and busyness are rampant, we share a different message: Rest Deeper. Live Fuller. Lead Better.

We need your help to keep this work going–and to make it better. So we invite you to join us as a partner on Patreon.com.

We want to release the same high-caliber, high-value episodes to you, but with even more excellence. We want to create even more conversations, prayers, interviews and 5-minute retreats for a more gracious, thoughtful approach to your life.

Our podcast will always be free to all listeners, but by subscribing to Patreon you can help–your monthly subscription helps us grow our team, pay for the hard costs of producing our work, and makes it possible for us to spread our message globally. You can partner with us for as little as $1 a month.

Plus, depending on your subscription, you’ll get access to some resources and opportunities available only to our patron community, like:

A copy of our talking points and notes for each episode.
Access to a members only Patreon feed.
An extra 10-minute “inside track” after-episode podcast, where we unpack the podcast theme further.
Helping us choose topics and respond to questions for future episodes.
A 20% discount for all of Unhurried Living online courses.

Help us produce the work you already love–become a subscriber today. We thank you in advance for becoming a part of our community. So head on over to patreon.com/unhurriedliving and become a patron today!

The post Podcast: Emily P. Freeman – Small Moment Living in a Fast Moving World appeared first on Unhurried Living.

Ash Wednesday: The Gift of Lent

Today is Ash Wednesday. It’s the first day of Lent. For years, that would have been completely lost on me. “What in the world is Ash Wednesday?” Most Baptists like me back in the day would have seen it as a “them” practice. Definitely not for “us.”

But now I am an Anglican. Next month, Lord willing, I’ll complete my ordination process and become an Anglican priest in the Diocese of Churches for the Sake of Others under Bishop Todd Hunter. This has become such a grace-filled home for both my soul and my work. And Anglicans definitely practice Ash Wednesday and Lent!

My Lenten Practice

So, as I have been thinking about my Lenten practice, I’ve come across one that I think is right for me this year. Both Gem and I are going to spend our evenings after dinner completely electronic media free. That means we’ll let the television, our computers, our smart phones and any other powered devices take a break each evening over the forty days of Lent right along with us.

How do I know that it’s the right choice for this Lent? Because I can hear a whiny little voice inside of me saying, “What will you do with yourself if you can’t watch television, or check social media, or look at email, or, or, or…” That nervous voice inside of me is nearly always a sign that I’ve touched a nerve in me that must die.

That sounds a little dramatic, but it’s real to me. As long as I allow that addictive little voice in me to sit behind the wheel of my life, I’m right back to imagining that “mind-numbing escape” and “true spiritual rest” are really just about the same thing. I wrote about this in An Unhurried Life. And I’m still in recovery with the more-than-occasional lapse.

Instead of media in the evening, Gem and I will visit with each other. Or read a book. Or sit outside and enjoy the evening (weather-permitting). Or play a board or card game together. Or even get to bed early for a change. It doesn’t actually sound that bad, does it? Maybe I’m not giving up all that much!

A Little No, A Bigger Yes

What we say “No” to in Lent is not about missing out on something good. It’s really about opening up space to remember what is truly and more deeply good.

I could choose some form of fasting for Lent. I could decide to fast a certain day or two each week. I would do this not to prove something about my heroic spirituality or self-discipline. I would do this to learn the wisdom of Jesus: I do not live mainly by the bread I eat. I live mainly because of my communion with God. The absence of bread has a way of highlighting the presence of God.

I could choose to give up hurry for Lent. I would do this not to be less productive for forty days. I could make this choice so that I can remember that “getting things done” and “bearing much fruit” are not always the same thing. Slowing down to the pace of love instead of the pace of greed, the pace of peace instead of the pace of anxiety, the pace of joy instead of the pace of excitement and over-stimulation just might prove to be an abundant life for me.

The “No” we say in Lent makes room for a bigger “Yes” to God along the way.

So, when I say No in the evenings to my favorite show, or to staying in touch with who is doing what on social media, what am I avoiding? I’ll likely be saying “No” to escaping my life. Or I’ll say “No” to checking for “likes” of one of my social media posts that feels like needed recognition from others. I just might discover, as I refrain from all of that “checking,” the voice of the One Who calls me his beloved coming through a bit more clearly. I might just find some real rest for my soul.

For Reflection

As Ash Wednesday is upon us, have you thought about a fitting practice for you in Lent this year? What little “No” might you say so as to open up space for a heartier, freer “Yes” to God’s goodness, beauty and truth?

I’d love it if you responded to this post and let me know your Lenten plans.

You Might Also Enjoy:

“Gluttony: My Disordered Relationship with Food“
“Can Beauty Be Found in a Dry Season?“

The post Ash Wednesday: The Gift of Lent appeared first on Unhurried Living.