Lysa TerKeurst's Blog, page 4
May 7, 2021
Many years ago, I made a promise to God…
Over 25 years ago, I was a struggling first-time author who desperately wanted her first book contract. After multiple rejections and long seasons of feeling so confused about the process, I made a promise to God: If I ever became a published author, I would help the next generation of communicators learn how to write, but also how to effectively communicate the message God’s given them.
She Speaks is part of that kept promise. It’s an annual conference offering professional training for women who write, speak and lead. We combine worship, engaging keynote messages and workshops led by industry professionals on topics designed to equip you in all aspects of your calling.
I’m so excited that since 2001, we’ve trained over 10,000 women and we’re not stopping anytime soon. In 2020, we took our in-person conference fully online and reached 2,200 women in all 50 states and 25 countries. It’s amazing to see community and connection that forms when women champion women. We believe God has a purpose for every single woman who attends She Speaks, and that includes you!
Friend, I want you to have this experience and I want to make sure that the God given message — that unique message — that’s inside of you gets shared with the world.
At She Speaks, we will equip and encourage you to communicate that message in the most effective and powerful way possible. So consider this your personal invitation to join the She Speaks community at our next event June 24-26, 2021 which will feature keynote messages from Jo Saxton, Paul Faris and yours truly. I hope to see you there (virtually)!
March 19, 2021
The Secret to Finding Beauty in the Midst of Pain
Have you ever wished you could change the details of your story?
While there’s no denying there are definitely painful parts of our story we’d love to edit out if we could, what if those same circumstances are the unlikely ingredients God is using to weave together a greater good we’d never want to miss out on? You see, with God, there’s always more than we currently see being worked out behind the scenes.
I recently sat down with Shae Tate, my dear friend and teammate, to answer some questions about finding beauty while walking through painful seasons.
In this short Q&A, you will be equipped to:
Uncover the secret to really seeing and experiencing God even in the pain you didn’t cause, the change you didn’t want, or the reality you didn’t know was coming.Disempower the lie that how you feel about your life is the full story by remembering with God there’s always something more true, lovely, and good right now.Show up for a friend who’s walking through a heartbreaking season with practical and personal ideas and to love and care for her well.This Q&A is available to watch on YouTube or to listen to as a podcast!
I pray this conversation will encourage and help you as you learn to hope again after all you’ve been through.
March 3, 2021
Start reading my new devotional today!
I deeply understand that when unexpected hurt shatters the way we thought our lives would be today, we can easily start to become guarded with others and skeptical of God.
But can I share something with you I’ve personally discovered?
Right now, in the middle of the pain you didn’t cause, the change you didn’t want, or the reality you didn’t know was coming … your life can still be beautiful.
I know it can be hard to feel like this is truly possible. That’s why I wrote my new devotional, Seeing Beautiful Again: 50 Devotions to Find Redemption in Every Part of Your Story, so we can start making progress together.
In these pages, you will:
Gain healthier ways to process your pain and learn to see your situations through truth-based perspectives.Disempower the lie that how you feel about your life is the full story by remembering with God there’s always something more true, lovely and good right now.Stop feeling alone in your struggles by spending guided time with God each day alongside me, your friend who will bear witness to your hurts but also help you move on.
Seeing Beautiful Again won’t be available until March 30, but you can preorder today and get the first 5 devotions right away to use during your quiet time this week.
Remember… with God, there’s always more than we see being worked out behind the scenes. I pray these devotions, Scriptures, prayer prompts and personal notes from my journal help you hold on to that truth, no matter what you’re facing.
February 17, 2021
Send me a text!
I love inviting people over to my house. There’s such beautiful connection that can happen while sitting at the table breaking bread and sharing life.
One day, I’m going to start having dinners where you will be invited!
Until then, I have another way we can connect more regularly. We can text! Here’s the number: 704-286-1121
And yes, it is really me. It’s not a computer bot or a Wizard of Oz-like person behind the screen.
It’s just me. Which means I won’t get to every personal text but I will randomly pick some each day to respond to. But even better, I will send you regular updates, encouraging thoughts, prayers, and videos (probably of my sweet new puppy, Givey.)
This is going to be so fun! I can’t wait to hear from you.
February 2, 2021
I have so missed gathering with you!
You know what I’ve really missed over the last year?
Gathering, having conversations, and opening God’s Word together. I’ve so missed coming to speak in your hometowns, at your churches, and getting to share about what I’m passionate about. And right now, that’s forgiveness.
So, my team and I created something really special just for you. I recorded a message from my new book Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, because even though forgiveness is such a cornerstone principle of our Christian faith, most of us don’t fully understand it spiritually nor how to practically live it out emotionally.
This 30-minute message is completely free of cost just for you, to use in whatever capacity you need… your church could use this as a Sunday morning message, you could watch it with your small group or share it within the women’s ministry of your church. You could even watch it personally for yourself. Truly, the possibilities are endless! I just want this to be a blessing to you during a time when getting together looks so very different.
I can’t wait until we can all be with each other again. But in the meantime, I truly pray this teaching helps you no matter what hard situation you may be facing today.
January 7, 2021
To the girl whose hurt cannot be undone…
To the girl whose hurt cannot be undone…
Forgiving can seem impossible when the other person has not just affected a season of our life but affected us deeply every day since.
Unchangeable wounds feel so very unforgivable.
I agree; the person who hurt you should have consequences for their offenses against you. But you shouldn’t have to pay for them.
Revenge is paying twice for a hurt that someone else did to you. You may think it will make you feel better in the short term, but in the long term, it will always cost you more emotionally and spiritually than you’ll ever know.
Believe me when I say that the peace forgiveness brings is more satisfying than the chaos of revenge. And I want to help you find peace in your life. So, I’ve created a space for us to make progress and experience healing.
Sign up for Proverbs 31 Ministries’ next free Online Bible Study of my new book, Forgiving What You Can’t Forget. The six-week study starts January 19, and I would love nothing more than for you to join us.
I’m in! Click here to sign up and learn more.
That pain you’ve been living with? Those unresolved feelings of angst? You deserve to stop suffering because of what other people have done to you. Let’s walk out this forgiveness journey together.
Love,
Lysa
December 29, 2020
Does God Even Care About Me?
“We know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28 (ESV)
In 2015, The New York Times ran an article called “Googling for God.”
In this article, author Seth Stephens-Davidowitz starts by saying, “It has been a bad decade for God, at least so far.” He goes on to ask, “What questions do people have when they are questioning God?”
The number one question was, “Who created God?”
The number two question was, “Why does God allow suffering?”
But it was the third question that slammed into my heart and made me realize the depth at which many of us struggle when we walk through devastating situations: “Why does God hate me?”
I’m not alone in wondering about God’s feelings when circumstances beg me to feel betrayed. While I would have never used the word “hate,” seeing it typed out as one of the most commonly asked questions about God shows me just how dark our perspective can get. The most devastating spiritual crisis isn’t when we wonder why God isn’t doing something. It’s when we become utterly convinced He no longer cares. And that’s what I hear hiding behind that Google search.
And I shudder to say this, but I think that’s what has been hiding behind my own places of disillusionment as I’ve walked through painful circumstance after devastatingly painful circumstance in recent years. What makes faith fall apart isn’t doubt. It’s becoming too certain of the wrong things. Things like: He doesn’t care about me. How can a good God be OK with this? What I see is absolute proof that God isn’t working.
That’s where I can find myself getting more and more skeptical of God’s love, God’s provision, God’s protection, God’s instructions and God’s faithfulness. And most of all, where I start fearing He really has no plan at all, and I’m just truly going to be a victim of circumstances beyond anyone’s control.
The problem with that thinking is while it may line up with what my life looks like from my place of pain and confusion, it doesn’t line up with Truth. And before everything went haywire in my life, I had already put a stake in the ground, proclaiming that God’s Word is where I would turn and return to no matter what.
I could resist trusting God and turning to His truth. I could run from it. I could, with bitter resignation, put my Bible on a shelf to collect dust for years. But I wouldn’t be able to escape what was already buried deep into my heart.
I knew in this deep-down knowing place that what I was seeing wasn’t all that was happening. Past experiences where I have seen God’s faithfulness remind me that I don’t always see God working in the midst of my hard times.
There are a few times in my life where I’ve seen dramatic moves by God happen quickly enough for me to say, “Wow, look what God is doing!” But most of the time, it’s thousands of little shifts so slight that the dailiness of His work doesn’t register in real time.
It’s hard when we are living in that space where our heads know God can do anything, but our hearts are heavy because He’s not doing what we are hoping for, what we’ve prayed for, what we’ve believed for, for a long while. I get it — and I’ve cried many tears because of it.
So, what helps? It helps to know these things:
God often works in the unseen. Just because we can’t see it or feel it doesn’t mean He isn’t working.
“We fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Corinthians 4:18, NIV).
What may feel like a lack of intervention is not a sign of His lack of affection.
“Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness” (Lamentations 3:21-23, NIV).
God loves us too much to answer our prayers at any other time than the right time, and in any other way than the right way.
“We know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28).
Today, look for beautiful ways God is showing you assurances of His love. His deep affection is all around you, friend. Even in the waiting places.
God, I know You are always working. Help me acknowledge You working in the unseen. I confess my skepticism when things are not working out the way I had planned. I choose today to believe I am not a victim to uncontrollable circumstances. Even when I don’t see it, even when I don’t feel it, I will stand on the Truth that You are working all things together for good. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
When you want biblically based teaching you can trust and relate to, Proverbs 31 Ministries is there to meet you throughout your day with answers from God’s Word. Would you partner with us so we can continue to offer you and women just like you the resources you need? Right now, your gift will make twice the impact! Donate today and your gift will be matched. Don’t wait, friend! Click here to give.
December 8, 2020
Help for Your Relationships in a New Therapy & Theology Series
When we’ve been deeply hurt, whether by someone or by circumstances outside of our control, we often wonder if forgiveness is even possible. What if they never say they’re sorry? What if things will never feel “normal” again?
I have wrestled with these questions too, and that’s why I’m so thankful that we’re back with a four-episode installment of the popular Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast series, Therapy & Theology.
In these brand-new episodes, we’re focusing on forgiveness, confession, unchangeable circumstances and codependency. You’ll hear from me, as well as Proverbs 31 Ministries Director of Theological Research Joel Muddamalle, and Jim Cress, my personal, licensed professional counselor.
To listen, click the name of each episode below or visit your favorite podcast app and search for the Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast and look for the episodes in the Therapy & Theology series!
What Forgiveness Is and Isn’t According to the Bible
Reconsider the misconceptions you’ve always believed about the forgiveness process by discovering seven truths about what forgiveness is and isn’t that may surprise you.
The Daily Cure For a Heavy Heart
Let go of any bitterness holding you back from offering forgiveness to those who hurt you by understanding the necessity of daily confession.
When the Unchangeable Feels Unforgivable
Find hope in the losses that are unchangeable or feel unforgivable by trusting in the character of God, even when you don’t understand what has been allowed by God.
Recognize what codependency is and how it may be keeping you from setting the appropriate boundaries you need to ensure that you and your relationships are healthy.
If you’d rather watch these episodes, head over to the Therapy & Theology page on the Proverbs 31 Ministries YouTube channel to view them!
My greatest desire is that you’ll find these conversations to be truly helpful as you lean into the places in your life that need some hope and healing, friend.
November 17, 2020
Forgiveness: The Double-Edged Word
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32 (ESV)
Do you ever find yourself defining life by before and after the deep hurt?
The horrific season. The conversation that stunned you. The shocking day of discovery. The divorce. The wrongful death so unfathomable, you still can’t believe they’re gone. The breakup. The day your friend walked away. The hateful conversation. The remark that seems to now be branded on your soul. The day everything changed.
That marked moment in time. Life before. Life now. Is it even possible to move on from something like this? Is it even possible to create a life that’s beautiful again?
I deeply understand this kind of defining devastation in such a personal way.
Like you, I wish I didn’t have such an intimate understanding of those feelings. But I do.
If you read my book, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way, you know of the shattering discovery of my husband Art’s affair and the long road of uncertainty I was still walking at the end of that book. The four years of hellish heartbreak that followed the discovery did eventually take an unexpected turn toward reconciliation. I’m grateful, but I have not been spared the slow and grueling work of finding one’s way again after experiencing something that forever marks your life.
When your heart has been shattered and reshaped into something that doesn’t quite feel normal inside your own chest, the word “forgiveness” feels a bit unrealistic to mention.
But friend, can I whisper something today I’m learning?
Forgiveness is possible, but it won’t always feel possible.
It’s a double-edged word, isn’t it?
It’s hard to give. It’s amazing to get. But when we receive it so freely from the Lord and refuse to give it, something heavy starts to form in our souls.
It’s the weight of forgiveness that wasn’t allowed to pass through. And for me, that’s mainly because I’ve misunderstood something so incredibly profound about forgiveness.
Forgiveness isn’t something hard we have the option to do or not do. Forgiveness is something hard-won that we have the opportunity to participate in.
Our part in forgiveness isn’t one of desperation, where we have to muscle through with gritted teeth and clenched fists. It isn’t sobbing through the resistance of all our justifications to stay angry and hurt and horrified by all they did. This is what I once thought forgiveness was, and after already being the one who was hurt, I couldn’t imagine having yet another process to work through.
But when I wrongly think forgiveness rises and falls on all my efforts, conjured maturity, bossed-around resistance, and gentle feelings that feel real one moment and fake the next, I’ll never be able to authentically give the kind of forgiveness Jesus has given me.
My ability to forgive others rises and falls on leaning into what Jesus has already done, which allows His grace for me to flow freely through me. (Ephesians 4:7)
Forgiveness isn’t an act of my determination.
Forgiveness is only made possible by my cooperation.
Cooperation is what I’ve been missing. Cooperation with what Jesus has already done makes verses like Ephesians 4:32 possible: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
Forgiving one another just as Christ forgave you. God knew we couldn’t do it on our own. So, He made a way not dependent on our strength. A forgiving way. A way to grab on to Jesus’ outstretched arms, bloody from crucifixion and dripping with redemption. He forgives what we could never be good enough to make right. He makes a way for us to simply cooperate with His work of forgiveness … for us to receive and for us to give.
That person or people — they’ve caused enough pain for you, me and for those around us. There’s been enough damage done. And you don’t have to be held hostage by the pain. You get to decide how you’ll move forward. If you’re knee-deep in pain and resonate with the feelings of resistance I have felt too, let me assure you: Forgiveness is possible. And it is good.
So, I want you to just sit here for a moment today and consider the possibility around this double-edged word, “forgiveness.” Not because your pain doesn’t matter. Not because what they did was right. Not because it fixes everything. But because your heart is much too beautiful a place for unhealed pain. And your soul is much too deserving of freedom to stay stuck here.
God, thank You for sending Your Son Jesus so we don’t have to do life alone. Thank You for caring about my pain and meeting me in this place. Show me how I can cooperate with forgiveness today, even when it’s hard. Help me continue to take steps in this healing journey with You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
You deserve to stop suffering because of what other people have done to you. That’s why I want to invite you to a special message I’m giving.
You can join me for this FREE Facebook Live teaching tonight, November 17 at 7:00 pm ET, on my Facebook page. I’m celebrating the release of my new book, Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, and today only, you can get 25% off your copy along with a limited time resource when you order through Proverbs 31 Ministries. Purchase your copy here.
I can’t wait to share what I’ve been learning with you.
November 6, 2020
I’ve always wanted to invite you to my home…
I’ve always wanted to invite you to my home, and now, I finally can. Although we can’t meet in person, I want to have you over (virtually) on November 17th for a conversation about my family’s personal journey with healing relationship heartbreak. In fact, I’m going to dedicate an entire night for you and I to walk through how to find redemption for our stories… together.
During this special live stream event for the release of my new book, Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, I’ll be sharing:
A special teaching on forgiveness.Live worship.An exclusive conversation about forgiveness between me and my counselor, Jim Cress.A downloadable resource to help you apply this practically in your life.A live Q&A with some of my family.
If you’ve been struggling through relationship challenges that continue to feed resentment and keep you feeling stuck, I don’t want you to miss this.
You can purchase your live stream event ticket here.
I can’t wait to spend this time with you!
