Kush Srivastava's Blog, page 41
May 26, 2012
Today’s Column in iNext DainiK Jagran
http://inextepaper.jagran.com/c/186967
Add on to the Above:
How many times have you thought of things in this World which are so not perfect? And if you are a girl then the imperfectionist nature of our society tends to bother you more, especially in the context of the incidents that take place every day and are reported in nearly every newspaper in our country.
On top of that, with the kind of law enforcement mechanisms in place in our country, parents are left with no other option but to feel insecure and scared about us. As a result, some parents don’t want their children to go away from them even for studies, especially if they belong to smaller towns and cities.
This might lead to frustation in the minds of children who might have seen some dreams for themselves and not getting the chance to pursue their dreams might lead to disappointment in life.
This needs serious thinking on the part of our society. What kind of environment are we as citizens providing to the people? And what kind of legal machinery is in place where people are themselves scared to approach a police officer for their own good?
What is needed though is to instill confidence in the minds of the people about the whole system. What is needed is to make this system function well. This would in turn mean quick disposal of cases on the part of our Judiciary along with presence of responsive and efficient investigating agencies.
Bringing the above into action is a basic necessity for a democracy like us to prosper and fulfill its ambition of giving justice to the idea of a welfare state.
Source: http://www.studyabroaddomain.com/
May 24, 2012
The Right One
A couple of days back, I was having this conversation with a very dear friend of mine who was all set to meet a girl arranged by his and the girl’s parents. The only question that was on his mind at that time was how will he know whether she is the right one for him.
Such questions do arise in all our lives and sometimes we are left wanting as sometimes there is no clear answer to such questions. If I want to explain this situation in purely psychological terms, its all about perceptions and making a decision based on the same perceptions which might be accompanied by the various inbuilt biases in the very process and mechanism of decision making.
Nevertheless, one has no escape when it comes to chosing the right one for themselves and they are left with no alternative but to chose from the list of people that their relatives might have prepared for them. Of course they can keep on waiting till they, in their own thinking find the right one, but someday for sure they will be making that one very important decision of their lives.
This brings us to a question as to how we can actually define the right one. Does that person need to posess all the qualities that our elders and forefathers used to talk about e.g. sabhya, sushil (in case of girls) and khandani etc. (in case of guys)? Or as our modern generation would like to portray it, that person should meet all the criteria that one has in mind for him/her, which might be too individualistic at times.
With the kind of society we live in and the concept of joint families that are still existant in many families across India, there is a great chance that one might not chose according to the wishes of the family as their criteria might not converge with one’s own criteria.
Then what’s the way out? Or Is there any way out of such a situation?
Well! As far as my understanding about a relationship goes, in any kind of relationship whether its being arranged or whether one is chosing for himself/herself based on the bonhomie between a couple; the basic ingredients that would decide the success and failure of a relationship are very much the same.
One needs to have a sense of giving and a desire to adjust and make at least some compromises. It is indeed very difficult for a girl to go on making compromises and that’s where a guy has to step in and take on his share of responsibility.
If both the guy and the girl are prepared to do what I just said, then everything will turn out to be just right and every girl or the guy would turn out to be the right one.
Source for Image: http://datingsymbol.com/2010/02/28/game-set-match-taking-your-relationship-to-the-next-level/
May 22, 2012
Expression Counts
I never used to notice these things a couple of months back. I guess it is just a part and parcel of the life soon to follow when I will be doing the same things like my father does every morning and my better half would tread the same path that my mother has got so used to following.
I am referring to nothing else but the morning search for the precious items that my father carries along with him to his office. And guess what, the only person on this planet Earth who is able to help him retrieve those very items from all the corners of his room is my dear mother.
Sometimes I wonder how can mothers be so efficient at what they do. From getting up in the morning, cooking meals, to doing every chore that is supposed to be done, they have mastered it all.
And inspite of doing all the above in as efficient a manner as possible, sometimes they don’t really get their due which they so much deserve. After all, a couple of words like a thank you or i love you can do wonders for a mom or for a wife.
I still remember a lesson that was taught to me a couple of years back. I was informed about the significance of expressing one’s feelings towards one’s parents and towards the people whom one loves, for its not very often that one will get a chance to do so and sometimes its too late before one realizes the importance of the very act.
So, all the guys out there, (why i say guys is because such an issue doesn’t seem to arise with girls), who think and believe that expressing one’s feelings will lead to a reduction in their machoism coefficient; just give it a thought once again, for expressing one’s feelings towards someone can be the most daunting of tasks that you might have come across and indeed it requires a lot of effort on the part of guys to do so.
My advice to all the guys would be to get rid of their inability to express themselves, for what’s gone will never come back and at that point of time, I don’t want you to be left repenting: “kaash main aisa kar paata”.
Source for Image: http://activeyouth.co.uk/express-yourself
May 21, 2012
The Real Evolution
How often in our lives do we end up doing things without getting our share of gains and success that we think we so deserve without realizing that may be we aren’t doing the thing that we are supposed to be doing or may be we are not doing it in a correct manner.
What follows thereafter is a total emotional and illogical outburst. We start blaming the Almighty for giving us our undeservedly destinies and cursing our luck for not being able to accomplish things in life. In short, we end up going in a depressive frame of mind from which we refuse to come out.
And when this happens we shut ourselves away from any and every person out of our comfort zone and we refuse to listen to any person that might have an advice to give to us. But how long can we afford to live in this self-imposed seclusion? 
Being the social beings that we all are we end up turning to the most trustworthy person in our lives who helps us in discovering the reasons behind our failures and indeed help us to overcome the problems related to our attitudes and thinking.
It is only after going through all this process that we end up realizing that inspite of putting all our efforts we weren’t putting those in the right direction. It is only when we do things right that we get to taste the fruits of success.
And this whole methodological process where a person gets to realize his/her shortcomings and his/her faulty process of thinking is what I call the Real Evolution.
So, all those out there who are facing such a situation where the end of the road is not visible and is leading to confusions and negative frame of mind, relax for a while and take a few deep breaths to ponder over a question which will lead to elimination of all worries that one might be going through at the very moment.
And that question is: “Did you do the things in the right manner?”
Source of Image: http://martyforeducation.blogspot.in/2012/02/evolution-revolution.html
May 20, 2012
Atom Bomb Vs Agarbatti
Today, I was watching this show Satyamev Jayate and Aamir Khan drew this comparison between an Atom Bomb and an Agarbatti. He was talking with respect to the Dowry practice that is so prevalent in our societal set up.
Some people will go to any extent to squeeze even the last penny left in the pocket of the girl’s parents to fulfill their wishes and whims. It all starts with a petty demand and soon it develops into a Frankenstein Monster till the point the girl’s parents are left wanting not able to fulfill the wishes of the guy’s family.
People who go about pressing people for dowry seem to have forgotten the very basic values that, once upon a time, used to define the very essence of the Aryan culture in which we take great pride while browsing through our History books.
They seem to have forgotten that in Ancient India, the guy’s family used to give gifts to the girl’s family in order to get the right of bringing the girl to his own family. Even today, in many North Eastern states, similar practices are followed.
Some people try to justify the practice citing that it is a part of our social norms like so many other traditions and rituals. They also cite the examples of so many who would go to any extent to have lavish weddings for their daughters.
There is nothing wrong in wishing good for one’s daughter but not at the cost of ignoring the very basic values which are extremely significant when it comes to the girl spending a happy and a fulfilling life with her partner.
My advice to all the parents out there:
“Please do not go on compromising when it comes to giving dowry or fulfilling the wishes of the guy’s side.
At the end of the day what you would want for your daughter is happiness and your responsibility is to find the right guy who would keep your daughter happy. And trust me, a guy who puts conditions and demands on you or your daughter is certainly not the right guy for your daughter.”
Source for Image: http://www.saanj.net/profiles/blogs/dowry-system-in-india
May 19, 2012
Inext Column 2
My column in Inext Dainik Jagran:
http://inextepaper.jagran.com/c/177823
I feel very satisfied when youngsters come to me and tell me that they indeed are benefiting from my opinions and views on things.
If you can make some difference in the lives of the people who are in distress or who lack the confidence to do well in their lives, and make them confident enough to succeed in their lives, then that’s the best thing you can ever do.
So keep smiling and keep yourself in a positive frame of mind 
May 17, 2012
Pursuit of Success and Happiness
In my previous article in inext Dainik Jagran, I had emphasized upon the point of chasing one’s dreams and doing what one really wants to do in life. But sometimes things don’t turn out to be the way we want them to turn out to be. Even after all the efforts that we put in accomplishing our goals in life, sometimes we end up on the losing side of scheme of things which can be really shattering and heartbreaking.
But one must always remember that this failure is in no way indicative of one’s potential or one’s abilities. It is just because of the kind of competition one has to face in order to get into top institutions in India, that even some of the candidates who deserve being right up there are unable to make it through.
There are numerous examples that I can cite who had to go through such tough times which are beyond our imagination and yet they were able to emerge as winners.
And one such example is of a gentleman whom I happened to meet a couple of weeks back. This gentleman, who hails from a not so well to do family, had already appeared for the Civil Services exam thrice before and had not been able to crack the same, and for the fourth time, having given the interview, he was expecting that better things would happen to him.
And guess what! He has qualified in his last attempt. All these years that he toiled really hard has finally paid off. His perseverance has finally been rewarded by the Almighty.
This man is a living example and indeed a source of inspiration for people who hail from a similar background or who don’t get to taste success for one reason or the other in the initial years of life, when they are not able to make it through to the big bosses of our education industry, namely the IITs and the IIMs.
No matter whether you are from Arts background or from Science background, if you have the will and the motivation and determination to work hard, you are surely going to succeed, if not now then surely, later.
It might take some time for success to come your way, but trust me, one day it is bound to come your way in spite of all the adversities and difficulties that you might have to face in this pursuit of success and happiness, which we all call life.
Source of Image: http://blogs.ubc.ca/opalleung/2010/11/13/the-pursuit-of-happiness/
May 15, 2012
The Positive Side of SNS
No matter how much we criticize the social networking sites (SNS) for wasting our time, we all end up browsing through the same whenever we are free or whenever we want to get a feel of what’s happening around us.
Whenever we want to share a news with our friends/relatives or whenever we feel like sharing some article which we like and would want our friends to read the same, what do we turn to? Yes! We login in our accounts and find ourselves chit-chatting on the same platform.
Social Networking Sites have become very much a part of our lives and it is here to stay. Recently, I happened to interact with an old lady in her 50′s. She has seen the lows in her life and has been through tough times. According to her, if it was not for Facebook, she would have surely gone down the lanes of depression.
We cannot even imagine how Facebook has altered the life of this lady, who once upon a time, even thought of commiting suicide. Every person needs a companion in life. Till late, people used to engage themselves in the beautiful institution of marriage, which forms such an integral part of the foundation of our society.
Recently, a new trend is emerging, though. Today, people try to get rid of their boredom by spending time on these sites and interacting with friends from all over the World.
On one hand, where SNS results in kids wasting a lot of their precious academic time on these sites, on the other hand, this, in all senses of the word is proving to be a lifeline for people like this old lady.
Whether you like it or not, these SNS are here to stay big time as these target the very essence of human existence and verifies the very fact that all humans are social beings and interacting and communicating with their folks is very much a necessity for all.
May 11, 2012
My column in inext Dainik Jagran :)
I am really excited about this one as this is my first ever column in a newspaper.
My intention is to inspire at least some youngsters so that they are able to emerge successful in their lives and are able to achieve their goals in life.
http://inextepaper.jagran.com//c/167332
The Quarterly Call
Does it sound like I am referring to a report being published by a bank or a financial institution? Well! It is no where close to what I will be telling you about.
Today, I received a call from a friend who has a tendency to give me a call after every 3-4 months. I don’t have my friend’s number as he makes sure that he doesn’t keep a mobile phone due to his hatred towards the same, which he developed due to some incident that occured in his life a couple of years back. So, no one including me can call him. We are all at the disposal of his sweet will .
More often than not, he uses a PCO to make a call and more often than not, he is travelling, when he manages to give me a call. And this time around, he was on his way to the God’s Own Country Kerala, where by the way, I have been trying to go since ages now but have not managed to do so for one reason or the other.
It is strange, but whenever I talk to him, I feel the same kind of bonding that we once shared during our childhood. The interval in between our conversations doesn’t seem to have any kind of significant impact on the way we interact and on the comfort level that we both share with each other.
And whenever we do get a chance to talk, more often than not, our conversations go on and on for hours. I guess that’s because of the accumulation of incidents and events in our lives during those 3-4 months interval. By the way, the friend that I am talking about loves to live in a style similar toHippies.
He works for a couple of months as a free lancer. And then he makes full use of the bucks he had earned during that time in fulfilling his travel ambitions. That’s how he leads his life. It might sound very crazy and unstable to people like us, but indeed he is living life on his own terms without caring much about what’s going to happen in the future.
At times, I am really jealous of him for not having the guts or the courage to do the same. May be because I want to make my future secure. After all, one needs to work in the present in order to make sure that he or she is able to enjoy the paybacks in the future.
But the question is what’s making me jealous? Is it because he is living the kind of life he is or is it because of my inability to gather the kind of courage to lead my life in a similar direction as he does? 
No matter whether I am able to find an answer to the above, the more important question that I should be asking myself is whether I really want to live a life like his and will I be comfortable with the whole scheme of things?
Most of the times, the answers lies with us. We just need to explore our inner soul in order to being able to decipher the same. What might be suitable for one person might not be so for another.
So, instead of making unwanted comparisons what one should really focus on is to decipher as to what one really wants and how would one want to lead his or her life in order to accomplish the aims that one sets for himself/herself.
This will not only help us remain happy and satisfied in our lives but would also enable us to derive happiness from seeing other people happy at the same time getting rid of the noxious habit of drawing comparisons.
Source for Image: http://www.freeclipartnow.com/electronics-technology/phones/casual-call.jpg.html
