Kush Srivastava's Blog, page 39

The Journey

The last outing that I had described in my previous post was indeed a very inspiring one, the evidence for the same is very well reflected in the decision that Saty and me made last night.

Since the weather was getting more and more pleasant by the hour, the two vellas of Lucknow, namely Saty and myself decided to go for a drive and have some delicacies for which my city is so famous for.

While we were very happily about to implement our culinary plan, the love for our karm bhoomi reignited once again instilling in us revolutionary thoughts of hitting the road once more in two consecutive days.

And there we were treading the path which would lead us to our destination. With a child like spirit, and with Saty jumping around in the car while the rain Gods showered us with their blessings, it was truly a rocking journey.

And guess what, to give us company from Unnao was my dear friend shikari, who by the way is all set to get married this very month .

Soon after we were found on a dhaba located en route to Agra. The dhaba treat lasted for another couple of hours and at sharp 3 a.m. we started our journey towards restoration of normality in our lives and it was only around 5 a.m. the whole procedure of restoration could be completed.

I used to wonder that life is a journey but never did I think that it would turn into a collection of the trips and tours that I undertake every now and then. In any case, I love all my journeys and am sure that the best is yet to come .

Source for Image: http://www.yoga.am/2011/07/11/experience-the-journey-called-spirituality/

Reminiscence

It’s not often that you get a chance to relive your past. Yesterday night was one such rare occasion when I got a chance to meet my all season friend after a long time.

He had just got engaged and we had no other choice but to celebrate his bachelor’s party our way . To give our salutation to the very celebration, my two other buddies and me decided to start our journey to the place where we were supposed to catch hold of our long time lost in transition friend who is fondly referred to as shikari (sometimes I wonder why the hell was he given the name, might be because of his excellent shikari like communication skills ).

On reaching the place, shikari was wilfully kidnapped by us and was taken to a nearby dhaba. The long gone college days flashed in front of my eyes. Ranging from discussions about marital life (which, by the way, was the focal point of our discussion for obvious reasons) to why Saty (one of the two buddies) would not want to get away from the mental trauma that he went through when he was a kid on hearing All Indians are my brothers and Sisters, it was in all senses of the word a hilarious outing.

It was not before 3 a.m. in the morning, that we realized that time had flown by while we had taken a dive into the waters of the nostalgic river. It was time to bid adieu to our dear friend and head back to where it all started.

How often the laughter and fun is followed by an ever prevailing silence which was only broken by the wonderful songs being played on the FM radio.

And while driving, I took a bow to the very nature of life which leaves us with nothing but the sweet memories that we will always cherish throughout our lives.

Source for Image: http://meandmyruminations.blogspot.in/2011/01/reminiscence.html

Being Popular: fb

How often is it that when we are totally vella (nothing to do) we end up browsing on the site that has for sure changed our lives (facebook)!

Yesterday was one such day for one of my dearest of friends. Strange, as it might sound, my friend decided to get a feel of his popularity on the same site (which can be quite a dangerous thing to do and indeed can have disastrous consequences   )and which is believed to be an indication of how social a person is and how much is the person being followed or admired on the same platform (guess that’s why so many superstars of our film industry have a presence here).

The results that followed indeed were disastrous. In spite of him tracking the number of responses, to his surprise he didn’t receive even a single comment for the whole day. After having gone through this miserable of experiences, he felt the urgent need to talk to someone.

So, he decided to give me a call.The conversation that followed is very much a representation of the philosophy and psychology behind the phenomenon which we all call facebook (coupled with the fact that the guy that I am talking about is very much a popular guy amongst his friends and at the same time, he is a big nautanki ):

“Dude! You know what happened today. I have been dumped by the society as a whole.”–Friend

“What happened? Why are you sounding so depressed”–Me

“Yaar, I didn’t even get a single response for a thing that I posted this very morning on facebook. Don’t I deserve at least one person taking note of what’s happening in my life and that too inspite of the elaborate friend list that I have.”–Friend

“Hmm! May be they didn’t have time today to come on fb or may be they didn’t notice your posting or may be they had several notifications. It’s not such a big deal and of course in no way representative of society dumping you. Stop being dramatic.”–Me

“No Yaar! Seriously! This incident has changed my perception completely. It is a fake world. I hate facebook, which is nothing but an illusion. Now I won’t ever login on the same.”–Friend

“Ok! But don’t you remember having told me about the wonderful experience that you were having on facebook by interacting with a number of girls on the same, a couple of days back? Suddenly, fb has turned fake and seem like an illusion, haan?”–Me

“Ya, I remember, but it’s not the same anymore. See, it all starts with a liking, then it becomes boring and then you think of dumping the same. Don’t you think its like having a relationship?”–Friend

“Truly, it is in all senses a means to have and maintain communication amongst friends and relatives. And by the way, nothing remains constant for ever. So, tomorrow, you might come to me again and tell me about the wonderful opportunity that this platform provides you for flirting around wih girls. Isn’t it?”–Me

“Ya, might be! By the way let’s get out of the virtual world. What are you planning for dinner?”–Friend

And soon we eneded up having dinner together. He had forgotten all his facebook woes by then, and around 11 p.m. we bid good night in order to throw ourselves on the beds in the cosy ambience provided by our respective houses in order to end a tiring working day.

Hardly, an hour had passed by, when I received a call from the same fb tourtured gentleman.

“Dude, I have got 33 replies for my post, and guess what! 20 of these are from girls:). Isn’t it incredible?”–Friend

“Indeed it is. Enjoy your fb session buddy. Good night!”–Me

And this is how it all ended.Three cheers to this phenomenon: Facebook

Source for Image: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/facebook/9035396/Facebook-worth-1.1bn-to-UK-economy.html, http://www.benzinga.com/general/entrepreneurship/12/02/2313758/dont-buy-into-the-facebook-ipo-hype

Saty Saty Yes Papa!

This can be the story of a guy living next door, a guy whom you keep meeting every now and then, a guy whom you wouldn’t notice in a crowd and a guy who gets up every morning thinking what he should do next.

There are so many such guys in India who don’t really know what they want to do in life. They aren’t sure as to what would be their next destination.

But one thing which is common amongst all such guys, thanks to the culture that we live in, is that they love their families a lot and respect each and every member of their family like no one else would.

They want to see each and every member of their family being happy. They want the best of things to happen to them. They take great pleasure and pride in seeing them getting successful in life.

Then why is it that these very guys are ridiculed at every step that they take by their very own family members? Why is it that the family members, instead of reciprocating the love, end up making the person sad and upset through their remarks? Why is it that they don’t get the same kind of respect as any other member would?

Is it because these guys have not been able to accomplish material success in life? Is it because they are not able to buy expensive gifts for their family? Is it because the very meaning of love and respect has been modified in our society to suit the powerful and the rich?

Whatever might be the reason for the above, one thing that our society must remember is that if we continue living the way we are by focusing on the materialistic pleasures in life, then the day is not so far when you wouldn’t find a breed so pure as above and a heart so loveable as above.

What we need to do thus is to preserve such breed and give it all due respect that it so deserves.

Source for Image: http://freshletes.bigcartel.com/product/rare-breed-tee-gold-black

UpBringing

When I was a kid, my father used to tell me about the importance of maintaining a balance between studies and sports/extracurricular activities. He used to stress on the fact that maintaining a balance was extremely essential for an all round development of an individual.

As a result, even though my mother’s top concern for me was to perform well in studies, she too had to bow down in front of my father’s wisdom. This in turn proved to be a boon for me as it gave me an opportunity to hone my skills in sports as well as in other co-curricular activites.

Why I have mentioned the above is because I am deeply concerned about the state of parenting which has taken a drastic turn in the present day scenario. Parents, today, are more focused on getting their kids selected in premier institutes like IITs at any cost.

In order to fulfill their pown ambitions, the kids are forced to join coaching institutes from class 6 itself. As a consequence, the kids after attending a day’s school end up going to a coaching institute thereafter.

By the time they come back, they are too tired to go for an outdoor activity. After a couple of hours rest, they are made to go through the task of finishing the rigorous home work that is given to them by both the school and the coaching institute.

The little time that is left is spent in playing videogames or watching TV, as it becomes too dark by then to let their child go out of their house.

If the above schedule was not enough, the child has to go through the stress evolving from the comparisons that are drawn between the child and his/her classmates or kids of acquaintances.

What would you call the above? If I had been through the same, I would have felt really constrained and irritated, at the same time would have felt helpless for not being able to find a way out of the whole pressure cooker scenario.

That is how the child of today’s generation feels like. The question that I would like to address to the parents is:

“Do they think that by providing an environment such as the above, they are fulfilling their responsibility of being a good parent?”

Source for Image: http://www.goldenlaurel.com/kthCards.aspx

The Counsellor

A couple of days back I had visited one of my friends who had held a get together of sorts in one of the famous hotels in my city. Well, to be precise he was getting married . After I have had a couple of drinks, a lady dressed in a black gown came over to me and said–”Are you a marriage counsellor?”

“Not really! Why, do I look like one?”–I was bemused at the very nature of the question, at the same time curious as to where this had come from.

“Actually, your friend told me that you are a counsellor and write in some newspaper.”–she tried explaining.

“Ya, I have been writing for a newspaper, but that writing doesn’t come close to being a marriage counsel.”–I just wanted to add that it is extremely difficult to provide counselling in case of marriage for its next to impossible to figure out what’s going on in a girl’s mind , but I thought of not adding the same just because of the sheer festivity surrounding the occasion.

Even though, I had nothing to do with the term, I started wondering about the complexities involved in the very nature of a job of a counsellor, especially a marriage counsellor whose aim is to sort out any differences and issues that might have arisen in a relationship.

Ranging from understanding the real cause of the problem to figuring out a solution, coupled with all the analysis and effort that goes behind figuring out the various variables responsible for the problem is a hell of a job.

Without going into the details of how a marriage counsellor would tackle a problem, the most important thing in a relationship is mental preparation on the part of the two individuals who are going to enter a relationship and the acceptance of a fact that their lives is going to change.

What they need to realize is that differences are bound to arise but those differences shouldn’t be allowed to develop into conflicts, which require some kind of understanding and patience coupled with a compromising nature on part of both the parties to the contract (after all marriage is nothing but a social contract, at least in legal terms).

If both are able to do just the above, everything should turn out to be just fine.

Source for Image: http://career.fullorissa.com/career-counselling-starting-soon/

Result Season

Come the summers, and we all are flooded with news containing the results of the plethora of competitive examinations taking place in our country coupled with the Board exam results.

On one hand, there are some fortunate students who emerge out with flying colours in these examinations, on the other hand there are students who are left wanting and face the wrath of our exam-oriented society with terminologies such as “bekaar hai”, “kisi kaam ka nahi hai” etc.

Recently I happened to talk to one such student who had failed miserably in all the exams that she had given ranging from the 12th Boards to the competitve engineering examinations.

Her family is upset that even after paying for the best of coaching institutes for her, she had failed them miserably. Constant comparisons with her friends who have been able to make it through, is driving her crazy to the extent that she had even contemplated running away from her home to avoid all the criticism that had followed since the results were out.

With the kind of the competition that every child has to go through in this country, parents must realize that there are bound to be children who will not make it to the top notch. They must therefore, instead of blaming their child, should provide a mental and emotional support to their child irrespective of the results.

Their love for their child shouldn’t be contingent, in any way, on the success or failure of their child in such examinations or on the kind of feedback they get for their child from the society and the near and dear ones around them.

It is extremely important that the parents should stop imposing their dream on their child and should stop treating their child as a trophy which they can show to the whole World.

Source for Image: http://www.testime.in/2012/02/28/cdsi-2011-final-result/

Such an Inspiration

Aamir Khan is surely an inspiration but I am not referring to him this time around. I am talking about the people whom he invited in his show this morning.

With the kind of adversities and challenges they have faced in their lives, it is extremely hard to maintain the same kind of positive outlook towards the same. I am sure it would have been much easier, if they would have opted for a path that most of us, in the same situation, would have, and that is to bow down in front of our destinies.

Truly and in all senses of the word, they have emerged well over and above what they were destined to be and have indeed defied the very meaning of the term.

It was heartening and really inspirational to see the way in which they chose to lead their lives. With no remorse whatsoever, they chose to lead a life as every other so called normal human being would.

They refuse to be treated any differently and want to vouch for their rights which their country had promised to them since the time of inception of our Constitution.

Now, it is upto us as citizens and our government to give them their due which they have been depreived of since decades and we must make sure that we don’t fail in our duties.

Always remember that our attitudes and our behaviour towards them can do wonders for such people.

Source for Image:http://www.instablogs.com/entry/a-disability-or-a-difability/

Get Real

One fine morning, I heard my neighbour’s daughter singing on top of her voice. Every time her song was followed by an assertion “main banogee Indian Idol”.

Well, it was “the” day for her and for many other youngsters like her who want to become Indian Idols, or more than anything else, want to become famous and want to be seen on the Television. Yes! It was time for auditions that were supposed to take place in my city the very day.

The kind of publicity and hooplah surrounding such reality shows has indeed have had an effect on the psyche of parents. The same parents, who might have reacted in an adverse manner hearing their child wanting to become a singer or a choreographer, now react in a totally different manner.

They want to support their child in his/her love for the field of Art that he/she might be interested in. They want to support their child in this quest for success and glory by treading the same path along with their child.

On one hand where there are parents who are able to rationally judge the talent that their child might posess, on the other hand there are parents who desire that their child become famous at any cost without really looking into the kind of talent that their child has and without making any effort whatsoever to enhance the same.

As a result, they end up making a fool of themselves in front of everyone who happen to watch such shows and by fighting with the judges end up setting a very bad example in front of their very own children.

This kind of behaviour on the part of parents coupled with the rejection faced by the child can have a very negative impact on the persona and psyche of the kid and he/she might end up developing complexes and negativity towards the World and towards its people, which might also effect the probability of the child in becoming a responsible citizen later on in life.

What parents need to do thus is to set a good example in front of their childen. Before really encouraging their child to run after easymoney and status, they should try to discover that one thing in their child which the child shows a liking to and then make sure that the child receives training from the best possible in the business.

This will not only help their child develop their skill set in a field that he/she likes, but also increase his/her chances of becoming successful in the field of their choice, which would indeed lead to happiness and satisfaction later on in life.

Source for Image: http://harshumeets.blogspot.in/2011/08/reality-shows-are-better-than-daily.html

Being Human

I have taken this title from Mr. Salman Khan’s Foundation to express a point that seem to have got lost and seems to have got confined to a particular section of our society.

A couple of days back, I was browsing through Facebook when I came across a couple of lines that my dear friendDeohad written on the plight of animals in our country.

To give you a background on the same, Deo and I have had innumerable discussions on the same topic. To bring out a revelation, personally, I am a bit scared of dogs, so whenever a dog tries to come near me, I tend to back off from its territory bestowing on it the right to enjoy the fruits of right to territory (as humans would like to put it).

On the other hand, Deo, as any other animal lover, would play with the dog or make sure that the dog is given its full due for being born on this planet Earth.

When I compare my behaviour to Deo’s I can’t stop myself from wondering as to what is it that makes me so scared of dogs? What is it in me as an individual which has resulted in me becoming averse of the same?

Is it because of my genes, which has been transfered in my family from generations and  which makes me genetically averse to the animal ? or Is it because I have had some bad experience in the past with the animal? or Is it because I have seen some dog going after its prey, which at times happen to be humans?

Whatever might be the explanation of my fearing the animal, does it give me any right to take out my angst or frustration on the animal having seen a dog in my neighbourhood? Worst are those amongst us who hit a dog or any other animal with a stone or stick for no reason whatsoever.

Does this kind of behaviour reflect on our personality suggesting that may be we humans, who are supposed to be the most evolved amongst all species are losing the very touch that makes us who and what we are?

Is it a reflection on the increasing hatred and intolerance in our society? Is it an indication of the increasing individualization and self-centredness? Is it because we have become so selfish that we don’t want to share natural resources and their benefits with anyone?

What we must not forget though is, that we as humans are the only species on this planet who can make a real difference by bringing a small modification in the way we perceive our nature and in the way we have become so used to the consumptive style of living.

The question that needs to be addressed is:

“Do we really want to behave like humans?”

Source for Image: http://aboutnicigirl.blogspot.in/2011/01/being-human.html